rockin' my world.

January PV month

24th 25th 30th
Mon Tues Wed Thurs Friday Sat Sun
RD meeting Grouping Leader's supper Bencoolen Appt
Network Supper by Arthur Making

31st
Mon Tues Wed Thurs Friday Sat Sun
Dinner Network Seah House
w RMs Supper@ T3 Evening

7th 8th
Mon Tues
Closing Tally

posted by Ben @ 1/24/2011 06:11:00 PM 0 Comments

Make a memory.

it's just only almost 2 weeks. But so much has happened. The only reason why i'm putting this post was just to remind me of this short journey.

Thank you so much. Thank God for letting me know you.

If only i met you at a different place and a different time, you'll be so mine.
I knew for one after this day ...everything would be different.

Man what can i say... My best friend was with me the entire while. When Mr " not very nice guy" over here ... started to feel those feelings inside we can't describe.

And i asked myself ... How can somebody with no emotions, started to feel this. Then i knew you were different. I started to feel emotions, my heartbeat raise when i saw u, I felt nervous when i'm with u, I smiled when i saw you, I really laughed out loud when we were on the phone.

I started to visualize .. the day we would collect our Porsche together ... The day we first enter our new apartment, Reflections@ Keppel Bay and our higher end living, our endless holidays.

I wanted to go along with my heart says, to go all out to get you. i just need time.

But i was faced with reality again. - The reality monster. Then all the flashbacks came back, of why i do the business. When i gave up so much .... I cannot allow even 1% of compromising.

My logical sense came in. Then i knew my decision. Emotionally fucking wrong, but logically fucking right. I had to make a decision.

This is business. Business sometimes is the best reality check ever.

Ytd morning .. I woke up, having mixed emotions. I felt so angry with myself .... and sad too, with my fate ... I knew i didn't want this to end on a bad note. I wanted it to be a perfect memory.

I need 3 years. Give me 3 years .... I'll be different. I won't be the same.

I fell in love with u. You made me felt that I'm human again and I might have a chance to experience romance and marriage. Pure happiness.

When I was driving back .... i knew it was the last. After this day ... I'm gonna have no emotions once again.

That drive wasn't easy. I wanted to send u back fast because i wanted it to end fast and not have anymore emotions. But yet i wanted to drive slow so that everything could just pause.

Thank God for letting all this happen and allow me to feel happiness from deep within in this matter of short time. But God, you probably understand my objecives and priorities very well. I'm sure it's all in your plans and my life will always circle around this 2 words. - Forbidden love. That's why you didn't allow me for one time to stray off the track.

Let this be a perfect memory.

Love. Ben.

posted by Ben @ 11/10/2009 10:52:00 AM 3 Comments

The perfect vision

The Porsche.
The Reflections.
The exclusive Millon club.
High-end living.

Romance.

posted by Ben @ 11/02/2009 04:33:00 AM 0 Comments

recession + h1n1 . congratulations.

Officially ..... I'm out of job last friday.

Basically , that's how it goes. I secured a job in Sales before i ORD so once i was out of the army , I already had a job. But after being in the job for 2 weeks and so, I was feeling super stressed out and exhausted and I thought about resigning ( just a meer thought. )

Then my boss gave me 2 options due to some incidents. Is that either i sign a 2 year contract or I resign. So how did a job ended up with a forced option of commitment ?

I made the decision to leave because i don't want my friends seeing me going nuts after 2 years. Because that's how i felt during my 1 mth plus there. I was going crazzzzzzyyyy.

Well ... so i'm living the life of a STUDENT in Holidays nw ! haha . that's the good part of it now. The bad part is ..... I NEED A JOB!

All i can say is , if u wanna be an employee ... Diploma no go man. The market rate for me now is 1.5k. bring home is 1280.

With that kind of pay.... EAT DIRT ! I can't even feed my parents. ha.

Other than my job , everything's going pretty well . =) looking forward to a few overseas trip this year .... but it sure is gonna be an exhausting year. haha.

but anyway , What happened to your health may anne ?!?!? You never update me sia. Whatever it is , make sure you take care too !

posted by Ben @ 7/01/2009 11:32:00 AM 0 Comments

now now... do looks define YOU?

it's pissing me lately ( just a little) that people keep defining people by looks. I'm not talking about the kind that people treat u nice because u are good looking and because u look not so nice and people treat u bad.

now tell me ... is there something the way i look or what? i swear to god ... there are at least 10 people all saying ( the girls) something related to how i look.

for e.g , in 2006 when i was gonna meet xin wei for valentine's day , just a catch up session that landed on that day and subsequently meeting up my gang buddies ( that's the actual celebration, with the guys). I got off the bus stop at far east plaza, headed to tangs and somewhere outside of NIKE B.I.R.D , this girl asked me to get some flowers for her.

And then i said, you know, i don't have a girlfriend , who do i get it for ? then there they go ... " HOW CAN IT BE?! DON't BLUFF LEI! "

well , i don't lie for such bad reasons ... i mean i don't in the first place... but .... i didn't have a gf that time for a long long time. 3 years in accordance of that day.

then came again , my female classmates keep asking me whether i have a gf each and everytime or even so now , when we catch up. I just keep disappointing them again and again in those 3 years in poly. then they say the whole same thing again ...

then again, i got some girls thinking i'm popular with many girls? even so dated til today. I think i know myself very well ... I super am the opposite of that statement.

popular guys ... i only know 2 and this number don't include me. That's oliver and owen.

I just have to re assure people that i'm just a regular guy and ain't got any x factor to get girls to me. Then of late, because my manager sees me everytime in specs and it just happens that i was without specs and he says without specs i look like a womanizer.

What the heck was that? haha. that is very very very harsh u know. esp when it is the total opposite. i ain't popular to start with and now i'm a womanizer? haha. my gosh ... the assumptions are getting worse and worse each year. I won't dare to do any anti aging stuff to myself now or even keep myself toned up.

so tell me ... is it wrong to be who i am or what? haha ... i should start working towards to being the best geek on earth. I should start learning from a mate named dax whom i know in sch. hmmmmmm.

posted by Ben @ 6/07/2009 11:52:00 PM 0 Comments

eat. sleep. gym.

i just went to look through my web albums and guess what i saw.
MY HUMBLE LITTLE EX-BIKE! the KAWASAKI KR150 KIPS



Well , i missed this little guy. makes a lot of noise when he moves off. Generates a lot of smoke when he take his big owner around. Makes people wonder whether there's a huge forest fire in the muffler. haha. Those were the days... Me hiding from my parents because they would kill me if i had a bike. parking a few blocks away from my house.

When my men in seletar saw me with my humble bike. then changing to a bicycle. then changing to my humble toyota vios sport. Well ... initially really really wanted a Honda Integra ... but parents super skeptical of other brands. Oh well ... still love my car though. Served me well. :)

anyway wen zhong and i were chatting. so we ended up talking abt bd presents. and they gave me this in 2006



This nike " EAT SLEEP GYM " t shirt. i guess they got it for me because it really described my life back then ? eat, sleep and gym. because in poly , i never actually paid attention in class. i only do one thing. SLEEP.

If anybody asks you what Ben is good at, they will probably say nothing but sleep. Ha, my ocs mates sure know that well. :)

wah lao eh , jia lat man. My blackberry camera not good. time to switch to my camera soon.

well , i'm outta here. time to sleep !

ORD IN 4 DAYS !

posted by Ben @ 5/08/2009 10:28:00 AM 0 Comments

New chapter.

Wow, I've been through many phrases of life and now it's gonna be the biggest one yet.

ORD LIAO LOH ! on tuesday lah.

Well, the next time we see each other in reservist... is the time we'll judge each other, who is doing better in their career.

IS LIKE THAT ONE MAH! Men judge each other on 2 things. The car you drive , and the watch you wear. haha.

So really, we can see each other progress in the next 10 years. Where we will be. Wife ? Kids ? BMW ? Mercedes ? or just a humble KIA?

nothing wrong with any of that .... but you know , men with their biggest problem ( which is ego ) , we super judge each other and compare.

I see my direction and i know it very well. Actually, a lot has happened for the past 6 months. Super. My life actually totally FLIPPED. Total transformation.

You can call it the worst time of my life. Or either the most important part of my life. Cause so much has changed. Haha ,not gonna elaborate it here ... if not i might as well go write my life biography out ... long grandfather story.

Well , my actual work is starting on 18th may. I can see my boss welcoming me with open arms ... ( I HOPE. ) haha.

THIS IS NEXT.

posted by Ben @ 5/07/2009 01:20:00 AM 0 Comments

Hectic life.

I just caught this movie. Darn nice. I RECOMMEND EVERYBODY TO catch it.
What's nice? This part, when he say " I DON'T KNOW WHO YOU ARE. I'VE ACQUIRED A SPECIAL SET OF SKILLS OVER A LONG CAREER.IF YOU DON'T LET MY DAUGHTER GO, I WILL FIND YOU. AND I WILL KILL YOU. "

haha , just go watch it , you'll understand.

Anyway ... been really busy for a long time. no much of a mood to blog actually. haha. Blogging for wenzhong to read rather. lol since he got back to the mood of blogging, so maybe one post from me.

I've just changed my wishlist today. over this few months ... haha, managed to clear some of them. for e.g , there's a new lcd tv sitting in my room. I would admit ... it's money pretty wasted , but it does impress anybody who goes into my room. HA. my auntie uncles.

Well, i'm gonna ORD soon. it's the time when nobody still really know what they want. But i have my goals packed and ready to rock. first one , would be my new 4 wheels beauty. :)

My platoon has been nice and i had a lot of fun with them. Thanks guys ! I'm happy to be your officer although u guys piss me off many times. HA

wah lao eh , seriously no mood to blog man . I need shen leong to come excite my life again sia. HAHA.

posted by Ben @ 5/04/2009 12:12:00 AM 0 Comments

ATTENTION!

Yesterday , i have just booked his first set of 4 wheels !

wait for pictures coming up !

posted by Ben @ 12/22/2008 02:54:00 PM 0 Comments

21st .

Celebrated my 21st birthday yesterday ! I mean , technically , today is my birthday , but we celebrated it yesterday !

BUT WAIT A MINUTE . is my blog becoming a gathering place to OCS TANGO WING PLATOON 2 SECTION 2 OFFICER CADET COURSE 69/07 ??

haha , then wait , u gotta see the vid i'm talking abt .



Anyway , my family and i headed to Din Tai Fung and had a food frenzy with xiao long baos and a few good dishes . Haha , then we walked around , checking wathces out and ended up in the shop next to Gap at Wisma.

There , i finally see see here , see see there . and ended up with my Emporio watch ! Dad got me the most expensive present ever !

anyway , i got problems blogging , this stupid blog . i put in pictures , then the whole html code messed up . lazy liao lah , haha .

posted by Ben @ 10/27/2008 12:48:00 PM 0 Comments