How is the Easter Bunny like Michael Jordan?
They’re both famous for stuffing baskets!

*writes paper*
this doesnt make any sense
*prints it*
*doesn’t proofread*
*hands it in for a grade*

me: *gets hit by a car*

me: sorry

I have had a really bad day and it always makes me feel better to see a pretty girl smile. So, would you smile for me?

You are so beautiful that I would marry your brother just to get into your family.

You’re hotter than Papa Bear’s porridge.

Damn girl, you have more curves than a race track.

I need a dollar, but I only have 90 cents… do you want to be my dime?

Are you my phone charger? Because without you, I’d die.