hey sue, i always tune in to read your wonderful pieces of art, please never stop writing. now, i came to ask if you’ve ever been in a position where you know you’re always going to love someone, regardless of any relationship you might pursue? it’s like you’ve settled for accepting that it might not work out between you two so you venture to find love in other people knowing that you’re always going to love this person? making peace with your feelings for someone while fishing the love you deserve in others ? no just me ?
I think I’ve felt this way about every person I’ve ever loved, and a couple who I never quite got there with. And I think there’s some truth in the feeling, and some exaggeration, and a lot of humanity. I think that as people, as much as we like to look forward to the future or back at the past, most of the things we predict don’t come true and most of the things we lament are imprecise memories. We can’t but to live in the present moment, feeling joy or anguish or love as we do. And of course our present emotions will cast their light on how we perceive our futures to be, but we mustn’t let them colour our experiences so far that we shut ourselves off to new love.
The concept of teaching people how to treat you is so wild to me - especially people who love you. I always believed that in love people would treat you right without having to be taught but I guess the nuances to what “right” means have to be communicated too
Is it really selfish to choose yourself rather than the person you love? Like, is it bad that I chose to end my relationship because I loved myself more? Is it okay that I'm hurting too even if it was my decision? And even if I still loved them?
I'm so distraught
It’s okay to make decisions that are right for you. That’s okay. Staying in a love that you’ve realised is not working for you is not selflessness - it’s lying to both yourself and them.
