Chapter Text
Vex’ahlia stared in shock.
The Halfling before her began to wring his hands.
“My apologises, my lady, but I’m afraid we just don’t have any.”
Vex’s mouth opened and closed, as if she was unable to get the words out.
The Halfling continued, “I’m sorry. I know how much they mean to you but they just aren’t here. There is nothing to be done.”
***
Percy looked around flustered.
“Juniper, get your brother down from there. Vesper, I need you to take your bag to the room.”
He rubbed his head. He was the Lord of Whitestone, surely that meant a little respect. But his children knew him as Daddy first, Mother’s darling second and the lord of a city a distant third. Percy Junior came into view standing on the back of a lumbering Trinket, a chamberpot on his head and wearing what looked suspiciously like a pair of Scanlans pantaloons.
“We are meant to be on holiday,” Percy tried again. “That doesn’t mean you can mess around.”
“Oh Percy,” Said Keyleth absently, “surely that’s exactly what it means.”
Percy looked over at her, the Voice of the Tempest, leader of the Air Ashari, currently scrawling crayons haphazardly across a piece of paper ably assisted by young Ludwig. From Percy’s eye, little Ludwig was the better drawer but he decided not to call attention to the fact. Derrig stood behind her, normally so stoic but everytime they came on this holiday, he watched the leader of his people return the gawky druid rather than the Inspiring archdruid of the AIr Ashari.
Percy turned instead behind him. “Jarett, can’t you impose some order?”
His captain in arms shrugged. “Alas no, lord Percival. I am here only to guard your children, not to partake in choosing sides.” He said it with a straight face but after 20-something years of service, Percy could hear the amusement in his tone.
“And just where is Grog?” Percy sighed, almost dreading the answer.
“Ah, he heard that Tary was constructing sand castles and rushed off to assist.”
“Oh gods …” muttered Percy.
“Do not worry, my Lord. Trish has followed him to the beach.”
Percy nodded. He wasn’t certain at what point the long running feud between Tary and Grog over their sand castles had started but it had been running almost all the way through the two decades Vox Machina had been coming to Dalen’s Closet. An interested feud as Grog still didn’t realise there was a feud and continued to ‘offer his help.’ Which Tary had, on occasion, commanded whatever version of Doty he was up to these days to try to halt the eager goliath. And Lawrence was a lovely man but had never got to a point of being up to stand up to Grog. Trish on the other hand brooked no nonsense with any of them and would prevent any unnecessary bloodshed. Or at least keep any innocent bystanders out of harms way.
“Vesper, your room is that way.” He said absently. He was sure it used to be much simpler than this to go on holiday. It was just Vox Machina themselves the first time but family meant that they needed more bags, and for a noble family to travel now, they had to bring guards and nurses.
“Velora,” he waved as he saw her enter the room, “would you please assist Vesper?”
“Sure, she’s bunking with me anyway.” Percy noticed Vesper perked up at that, put down her book and grabbed her bag, but before they could leave, Vex walked back into the room.
Percy noticed immediately that Guath, the Halfling who ran Dalen’s Closet here in Shamal Bay, was behind her, wringing his hands, a habit he had picked up over the years, probably largely from their holidays here, Percy thought to himself.
But his concern was for his wife, apparently distraught.
“Dear, what’s wrong?”
Velora approached her sister.
“Vex, what’s up?”
Vex cleared her throat and Percy noticed that everyone in the room shushed and looked over.
“Darlings, I’m sorry to report dreadful news but ….” She paused.
“What?” Velora leaned closed and Jarett instinctively reached a hand towards his crossbow
“… I’ve spoken with Guath and it’s with regret that I have to tell you all …”
Everyone was poised with nerves now.
“… that there are no mangoes this year.”
Silence.
Then Trinket sat, upending Percy Junior and let out a mournful wail. Vex immediately went over to him.
“I know buddy, I know” She enveloped the bear as best she could with a hug whilst the rest of the room relaxed. Percy was sure he could feel the smile on Jarett’s face but as he picked up his prostrate son, Jarett’s face was blank.
Too blank, Percy thought.
Velora smiled, patted her sister on the shoulder and motioned to Vesper and they left as Juniper took the opportunity to clamber up on the roof of a nearby hut, her twin brother up there and already pretending to hide.
Percy shared a look with Keyleth, who went back to her crayoning, and knelt next to his wife, bringing the one son he had grabbed in with him.
“No mangoes?” He asked, keeping his tone neutral.
“I’m sorry darling but Guath says that the shipment of fruit he was expecting never arrived.” Here she looked up from Trinket and continued earnestly, “Apparently the ship was besieged by pirates after it left Nicodranas and they took many of the supplies.”
Guath, still hovering, interjected. “The crew bravely defended themselves but the pirates had ogres who crushed men with a single blow and casters who cast fireballs by the dozen. Only a handful of brave sailors were left and all were branded by a devil woman. The cursed survivors all spoke of a mighty Orc captain who bore no blade and whom blades could not even hurt and it was his brand that the devil women scarred them with. The brand of Captain Ford TuskTooth.”
“Yes, thank you Guath, that will be all.” Percy made sure to bring the brunt of an imperial tone and Guath had already nodded and was turning away before he caught himself.
Lord of Whitestone, Percy thought to himself and if I tried that tone on any of the children, they’d just smirk
Vex looked at him
“What are we going to do, darling? No fruit!”
He cupped her cheek in one hand, the other holding a squirming child “My love, we are Vox Machina. We have defeated dragons. I’m sure we can manage fruit.”
Up from the corner, Keyleth piped up, not removing her gaze from the artful masterpiece under construction. “Do you want me to grow fruit trees, or just go to the Menagerie Coast and get some?”
“See.” Before Percy could continue, Keyleth started up.
“Oh, oh. Ooohhh, we get Pike back from her naughty business with Scanlan and we take a girls trip to Ank’harel. You, me, Pike. We could pop in to see J’mon Sa Ord, get our hair done, maybe stop and get a sandkheg or two for Grog”
Percy sighed again as he thought of the damage to the Whitestone Treasury likely to ensue.
Vex had also perked up at this point. “I could do with some new silks, as could Velora. I’ll check in and see if she wants to come. Juniper, tell your brother that he shouldn’t hang upside down like that for too long. Come along Keyleth, we have places to go.
“Don’t worry buddy,” this to Trinket as she rubbed his cheeks affectionately, ”Mummy’s just going to pop out and get you some fruit.”
And with but a quick peck on the cheek, Percy was left with one son clambering back on top a still mournful bear, another deciding the white tiles were better than paper to continue his masterpiece, and the gentle thump that suggested one of the twins was abruptly off the roof.
It would Percy thought, going to check on which child had fallen, probably be less hassle to track down this Captain Tusktooth and get the fruit back.