Chapter Text
"DAMNIT MAAYA!"
"Haar'chak!"
"WHY-"
The rest of the crew screamed as their resident child decided to veer off course and go into the nearest wormhole, a decision that was considered intelligent by absolutely nobody. Kaiant did his best to steer away, only succeeding in getting the controls jammed, prompting their R4 unit to hit him with a lightly flaming screwdriver and take over manning the ship as their medical droid started to prepare a eulogy and funeral arrangements.
"Let me drive. It is the will of the force," Jedi Knight Venca said without a shred of the truth, just the hopes that she would be able to get them through to the other side alive, while Luiryl silently whispered prayers, at first to survive and then for a lightsaber so that he could end it quickly, reaching towards Kaiant's stash with the hopes that his smoldering leg would prevent an intervention. He was wrong. He too experienced the fire as the medical droid went against its own programming to question what its life had become.
Venca sat with furrowed brows as she navigated through the wormhole, dodging stray space junk, until they finally reached the other end, at which point nobody was on fire any longer thanks to the existential medical droid. They were running low on fuel, she'd need to land on the first planet she could find, but they were so far out that she had no ideas what territories awaited, or whether they would welcome a group of Jedi. She hoped she hadn't run into any Sith space.
"WAIT! LOOK! I think we need to go there," Maaya grinned at the rest of them, pointing towards a small planet which looked somewhat Alderaan.
"Well, we don't have much of a choice, we'll try to refuel there and continue our journey in 2 days," Venca sighed, taking stock of her current situation.
One in which she was responsible for two people who barely knew how to wave around lightsabers, a literal child and a pair of slightly faulty droids with personality issues.
But it was only when she hit the atmosphere that she realised just how screwed they were.
The ship shot downwards, much quicker than it should've. Even using the force only slowed it down marginally, the pull increasing as they went down, and their dangerously depleted fuel tanks weren't very helpful.
Venca found herself barely able to pull up slightly as they reached a strange cliff face with faces on it, crashing directly into one of them.
The ship shuddered and lurched, Maaya and Luiryl falling over as the SVICT embedded itself into the man's nose. Kaiant had been thrown into a wall and was out cold, while Jarx2 fussed over the blood he was spouting from an abnormally angled arm. Venca was splayed out on the controls.
R4 was completely fine, and having a pretty good day overall.
It was at this point that Hiruzen Sarutobi, the 3rd Hokage, looked out of his kitchen window to see the massive metal thing in his sensei's face.
"Not my problem, not my problem..." he chanted in vain as his ANBU appeared.
"It's my problem, isn't it."
Hound and Crane nodded.
"Damnit," looks like he wouldn't be available for his son's birthday after all.
Instead he had all the fun of dealing with whatever that was. Retirement could not come too early. Perhaps he could lure Jiraiya back...