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The day had started out normally enough, it was one of those rare days where he and his Guardian had a break from their daily assignments. On these rare occasions, they normally filled their time simply staying home, and relaxing. If you could call meticulously disassembly and reassembly their weapons over and over again until they were satisfied relaxing. Most wouldn't but Lior found that it was one of the many ways he and his Guardian bonded.
This had been one such day.
Lior watched as Avik tilted his head, eyes fixated on their Monte Carlo rifle. It was Avik's signature weapon of choice but recently, his Guardian was looking to improve it. They managed to get their hands on a few parts Avik thought would help, parts that cost them heavy in Glimmer.
Yet his Guardian still didn't seem happy with the result.
"Something's still missing?" He inquired, floating next to him.
Avik let out a sigh, lost in thought, "Maybe…"
Lior has known his Guardian long enough to know what happened when he got like this. He'd become so fixated that he wouldn't stop until it was perfect. Taking apart every component with the utmost precision, he'd be up all night, neglecting sleep like he always did. It was something he noticed warlocks tended to do. Perfectionism was their strong suit and given the dark circles underneath his eyes and how paler his purple skin was, it was clear that it was already happening.
He needed to fix the problem so that his Guardian could sleep.
"Maybe more stability?" He suggested, hovering in front of Avik's line of vision to get his attention. "We can go out and see if Banshee has some spare components or maybe some of the other auto rifles we have would be a better fit?"
Lior watched as his guardian let out a sigh that then turned into a yawn. "No, I've checked those and they've long passed their use."
"So Banshee's it is?"
Avik looked at his rifle one last time before nodding. "Yeah."
They were walking down the streets of the city a few moments later.
Lior floated just above the cobblestone streets of the Last City, his core pulsing with a soft, steady blue light. The neon signs and holographic displays cast fragmented reflections on his sleek, metal surface. The night was quiet, with only the occasional murmur of late-night conversations or the distant hum of machinery breaking the silence. It was peaceful, but Lior couldn't focus on peace, his priority was making sure Avik slept. It might be a ridiculous thing to worry about, this he knew. With the life and death situations Guardians go through every day, worrying about something so minuscule, seemed senseless and yet Ghosts still worried.
No one ever really knew the length Ghosts will go to keep their Guardians alive, the life and death situations they were all put in were one thing, that was normal, but from Lior's own experience, Avik's lack of his own well being was something he always found himself watching out for. Not the Fallen, The Hive. Between the lack of sleep, forgetting to eat, two very important things a living being needs to live, he concluded long ago that Avik was his own worst enemy and Lior couldn't understand how his Guardian could be so forgetful when it came to basic needs.
Yet if Avik could read his thoughts, he knew he would merely chuckle from his Guardian amusingly and be told that he was being dramatic.
The crowd seemed to expand in size and the increasing pressure seemed to urge his Guardian forward, Avik never did like being around crowds, he increased his speed to keep an equal pace with him. But as he floated through the crowd of people, one moment his Guardian was there and the next, he wasn't. Lior stopped, hovering in the air, for it took him a moment to realize that Avik's tall, armored figure had been swallowed by the sea of people.
"Avik?" Lior hovered higher, scanning the mass of bodies for any sign of his Guardian's distinctive armor. "Where did you go?" He called out, turning in different directions, hoping to catch some trace of Avik's armor against the crowd.
But there was nothing, not a single track of his golden leaf armor anywhere. For a moment he stood there, looking around, and then off in the distance he heard a scream. A flash of red impaired his vision, there was fire and smoke everywhere, people screaming, Ghost's remains scattered about while their Guardians lay dead by their side. Lior let out a gasp, he shook himself about and he was back in the Market. No fire, or dead Guardians, simply children laughing and the clinching of glasses. Yet that didn't stop the fear from building, in fact it was near immediate.
Panic clawed at the edges of his thoughts, memories of the Red War paralyzed him. The chaos, the fear, the helplessness. Three days, for three days he did nothing else but search for him, scanning what seemed like a hundred bodies, looking for Avik, the panic that he might be dead, the dread knowing he wouldn't be able to bring him back— it all came rushing back in a single second.
Bodies… so many many bodies.
"Guardian!"
He darted between people, his light flickering erratically as his anxiety grew. The market, usually a place of vibrant energy and life, now felt chaotic and overwhelming. The laughter, the clinking of glasses, the hum of street lights—it all blended together into a kaleidoscope of colors and shapes and warmth, warmth that reminded him of the Traveler, yet that didn't not calm him.
Calm down. He told himself, trying to steady his trembling core. Focus…
But he couldn't, the more he searched, the more the crowd seemed to press in around him, it all felt like a never ending tide of faces and voices. His sensors reached out, straining to find Avik's signal, but it was lost in the noise of his own static thoughts. Logically, he knew he was being ridiculous, for any other Ghost that lost track of their Guardian in a crowd of people would simply fly over them to get a better angle, and yet all logic faded away.
Death, was all that consume him, so much death. Avik's, his own, Cayde, Sundance, Targe, the pain of everything.
The fear of being alone, alone without his Guardian by his side gnawed at him, clouded his senses, he felt sick, because he knew he wasn't supposed to be here amongst these civilians. It didn't feel right, he was meant to be alone amongst their laughter and joy, he didn't deserve to be.
He let out a gasp, a shiver enveloped his very core, the energy in him suddenly vanishing, all that plagued him now was the Red War, his death, Avik's, everything was too vivid, and it felt him paralyzed.
"Guardian…" His voice hitched, "Avik.."
"Lior?"
He spun around and saw, not his Guardian, but Glint. He felt like he could cry with relief, he made to move, to float over towards him, but couldn't. Glint seemed to notice this and floated towards him, "There you are!" He said, relief in his voice, "We've been looking for you for… Are you alright?"
"No… I can't find—" He felt sick again, losing momentum. "Avik, I can't find him! I lost him again!"
"It's okay." Glint gently bumped the side of his shell against him, "Everything is fine. You didn't lose him. He's fine. Once he realized you were gone, he went straight to the Tower but ran into us, he's with Crow." Glint's tone was calm and reassuring. He floated closer, his light a steady, comforting presence next to him. "I'll take you to him."
Lior tried to steady himself, it was as if his very light was flickering as he followed Glint around several twisting corners. And for what seemed like an endless torment of mazes, they emerged into a quieter section of the market, he floated there for a moment, scanning the area before his opic finally found Avik, standing right with Crow, just like Glint said he was, Avik's worried expression softened with relief as he saw Lior.
"Guardian!" He cried, his voice breaking with relief, as he sped towards him. "Avik!"
"Lior!" Avik ran towards him, meeting him half way before reaching out, cupping his hands together. Lior settled into Avik's palm instantly, "Thank goodness… you’re okay… You’re okay."
Lior trembled, the fear still lingering in thoughts, "I lost you, I'm… I'm sorry, I thought… I—" His Guardian pressed him against his forehead, smoothing a thumb along his shell, trying to soothe the fear away.
"I lost you…" His Guardian's tone held a deep guilt, as he held him tighter, "When I moved away from the crowd, I… It was all… I didn't know you weren't with me until I couldn't feel you anymore." He felt a tear drip down onto one of his fins, "I'm so sorry, Little Light."
”Please.” Lior trembled, closing his iris and tried to force the fear away. Everything was fine now, he'd found his Guardian, Avik was safe, alive and right here. "Can we go home now?"
"Yes." Avik answered shakily, pressing him to his chest, "Yes, we can."
Lior distantly heard his Guardian thank Glint and Crow for their help. His vision fades in and out again, the exhaustion feels overwhelming, the strange thing was, even though he didn't need to sleep. Right now that's all he wanted to do. He wanted to close his iris, lay on Avik's chest and sleep while his Guardian holds him close. Lior comes back around once he hears the familiar creaking of the door to their home creak shut. His Guardian didn't even bother taking off his armor, he seemed to have thought exactly what Lior was wanting, as he all but collapsed onto their soft but tattered bedsheets.
Lior let out a shaky sigh, nudging his shell against Avik's chest. Now that he had time to settle, he can't help but feel ashamed. He felt so foolish, to act in such a way, this was something Targe would never have done.
Suddenly he felt a finger poke him, "Stop that."
He looked at his Guardian, "Stop what?"
"Overthinking." Avik looked at him, giving him a small smile. "You feel embarrassed, but you don't have to be. What you experienced was normal—"
"For a person." Lior interrupted
Avik poked him once more, "For anyone." He cupped both hands around him and held him up in the air right over his face. "You feel, Lior. Just like everyone does, it's normal."
He looked at his Guardian, really looked at him, saw the kind, and understanding person that he was, he also saw fear within those eyes, while Avik held him exactly like he had when Cayde brought him back.
When he died, he remembered how it all felt.
There was light, so much light, the light of the Traveler. Cayde had been right when he said it was a peaceful nothing. Because it was so peaceful to be part of it again, he should have felt whole, should have felt overjoyed to be one with the Traveler again, but he wasn't, he wasn't because he couldn't feel his Guardian anymore, he was half a whole. And he couldn't handle that, the pain was unbearable. The agony of not being whole. So he searched. Wondering in the light, looking for his Guardian like he had before. Because he had to be here somewhere. No matter how long it took, he'd find him.
When he woke, there was Avik. Tears in his eyes, in pain, like he had been. There was love there too, a pained love, a love he thought he'd lost.
He floated out of Avik's grasp, and bumped his shell against nose, "Guardian…."
Avik let out a sigh, content, at peace, just by his presence alone, "It's okay…" He ran a finger along his shell, "I’m here and so are you. We're okay.“
He closed his optic and refused to move, relief filling him, the last remnants of the fear he had been encapsulating his very core, finally fading away, he nudged himself further into his Guardian's face, the half that made him whole, "I love you."
There was no greater truth than that, his love for his Guardian, was greater than even his love for the Traveler. He felt a gentle, chaste kiss pressing against a fin.
"I love you too, my Little Light."