Chapter Text
Elizabeth was standing on the balcony outside her office watching the sun setting on the horizon and coloring the sky in a myriad of shades of red, orange, yellow and grey. Strange how it felt both familiar and different at the same time, this planet that was to be their new home for an indefinite period of time. The coloring was just like on earth, the sound of the waves breaking on the solid walls of the Atlantean piers just as familiar. But the sound of seagulls was missing and the smell of the ocean was slightly off though she could not put her finger on how exactly.
She let her eyes wander over the silhouette of the Ancient city bathed in the last rays of sunlight. What a wonderous sight, she thought. A few weeks ago, she had been in Antarctica putting together a team for an expedition that she had no idea would ever happen. She had been so hopeful and then so excited when Daniel had informed them about the gate address. To find the city of the Ancients, Atlantis. Even then it had seemed more a dream than reality despite all the gate travels the teams at SGC had accomplished over the years.
She had not really believed the IOA would allow her to become the leader of an undertaking of this magnitude. She also knew there were more than a few heads in the Pentagon who thought that this should have been a solely military operation. But by some mysterious fate she was standing here at this balcony railing looking out over this vast city that was under her command now.
It was humbling. It was invigorating.
There was so much to explore, so many secrets to unravel. At night she had trouble closing her eyes and finding sleep as she was so hyped up at all the possibilities. The Ancient database alone was an endless source of information and every day their teams explored the city only to come back with sparkling eyes and wonder in their voices. It felt like a treasure hunt, like being a child again when every day was filled with explorations and discoveries and even the smallest stone on the beach could set off her imagination.
If only it could be that easy. But she knew when she had taken this position that it would also include a ton of responsibility. There were 200 hundred people depending on her making the right decisions as their leader. She was responsible for their safety and it was not as if they could just call in more troops if the waters were getting rough. No, they would have to make do with what they had, which did not seem much in light of the enemy they faced and the current vulnerability of the city.
Major Sheppard had not really made her task any easier when he had brought back Teyla’s people from his first mission. But then, as he had pointed out, they had been responsible for the destruction of their settlement so it was the right thing to do to offer them shelter in the city. And Teyla had become a valuable member of Sheppard’s team.
But when the Wraith attacks on the off-world team had started recently and Sergeant Bates expressed his suspicions, Elizabeth realized that maybe she had been too naïve. Had she been negligent in her failure to get to know Teyla’s people right away? Could she have done things differently? Should she have?
She had felt isolated when once again Major Sheppard had challenged her way of approaching the situation just as he had when Colonel Sumner had been taken captive. For once, she had hoped they would be on the same side of the argument as far as the safety of the city was concerned. But John, as she thought of him in private, had chosen to take Teyla’s side instead. And while she could not honestly fault him for it since she herself had not really thought Teyla guilty of betrayal, it made her realize how much he and his team had bonded on their missions over the last weeks while she remained in the city taking care of administrative tasks. She could not help the pang of envy that thought caused. Should the two of them not have formed a team as well in their task to keep the city and all its inhabitants safe? But with their need for another ZPM to power the city’s shield, the missions to explore the planets took precedence over spending time to establish their working relationship. And when had this become a competition for his loyalty, anyway?
She took a deep breath and closed her eyes.
“Some heavy thought that must have been,” sounded an amused voice from behind and she whirled around only to come face to face with the object of her thoughts. She could feel the blush creeping up her cheeks as if he could read her mind.
“Major, you startled me!” The words were out of her mouth before she could think about them.
“Sorry,” he apologized and maybe it was her previous thoughts about him but something in his voice made her doubt if he really meant it.
“I came to give you an update on our new prisoner.”
She was tempted to take another deep breath and only barely held herself back. Instead, she straightened her shoulders and met his gaze head on.
“How is he?” she asked.
“Grumpy,” he answered and she raced an eyebrow. He shrugged. “Not that I can blame him. I would not be all that chipper myself if I were in his position. Although, come to think of it, I might have been the evening meal by now if our roles had been reversed.”
“Speaking of meals, how do you plan to feed him?”
“Well, we’ll keep trying different foods but so far he seems to be a picky eater with a very limited appetite for the one thing we do not have on the menu.”
John came to stand next to her and leaned his forearms on the railing.
“I must admit I am not at all comfortable with the idea of starving him,” Elizabeth let out a sigh.
“What do you want me to do?” John asked and she perceived a slight note of impatience in his voice. “It’s not as if we have any volunteers.”
“Well, maybe you should have thought of that before you took him prisoner,” she countered. Way to go, Elizabeth, she thought. Drive him into a corner. That surely will make him come around to your way of thinking.
John straightened and clenched his jaw. “He was about to feed on Teyla. What was I supposed to do aside from killing him right then and there?” he asked anger now rising in his eyes.
Elizabeth swallowed. She hated that they were already in a confrontation again but his tendency to rush into action without giving more than a slight thought to the consequences irked her.
“I don’t know, Major, but it seems you’re going to kill him anyway, only it will be a slow death instead.”
John stared at her hard before averting his face and looking out over the ocean.
Elizabeth sighed. “Look, Major. I realize this was a military situation and it was your decision to make and I respect that. But we have to come to an agreement on how to go on from here. What are we going to do with him and won’t his presence here risk the safety of this city? Will it not bring the Wraith right to our doorstep?”
“They have no way of knowing where we took him, so I think the chances are slim. And I guess they are already searching for us, so what does it matter anyway? On the other hand, we might gain some intel from him on what they already know and what their plan is. It could help us come up with a suitable strategy for defense.”
Elizabeth thought about that. “And you think he will give away anything?”
John shrugged. “It’s worth a try. So far, we have nothing. I hate us being sitting ducks. I’d like at least to try and find out what we can from him.”
Elizabeth nodded. “Okay.” She paused. “Okay, but let me know as soon as you learn anything.”
“I will.” He started to leave.
“How is Teyla by the way?”
He stopped and looked at her and it was hard for her to read in his face what he was thinking. “She is fine. She is an impressive fighter. I might take some training lessons from her.”
More time to bond, she thought with another pang of envy. She forced a smile. “Sounds good. I talked with her earlier about the situation with her people. I apologized for the suspicions. I think she understood.”
His chest rose with a deep breath as he chewed on his lower lip while thinking on his next words. “She might, but Bates and I are going to have a problem if he continues to throw accusations around like he did this last week. I will not let him discredit a member of my team in such a way again without any substantial proof, Doctor.”
She admired him for his loyalty to his team. It was the sign of a true leader. She only whished he would show even a slight trace of the same loyalty towards her.
“I know, and I agree,” she acquiesced. “I’ll talk to him.”
He seemed surprised at her reaction but nodded. “Thanks. Good night.”
“Good night,” she replied and watched him walk back into the tower.
That went well, she chided herself. She did not know why there was always this tension between them but guessed it must be due to the fact they were still in the early stages of figuring out their respective roles. General O’Neil had warned her that Sheppard would not be an easy man to rein in. She had dismissed his advice but back then she had not really considered the chance that she would have to be the one to do the reining in. After all, this was supposed to be Colonel Sumner’s job and he had not thanked her for it either.
Would she have made a different choice about Major Sheppard if she had known then that he would become the military commander so shortly after their arrival? She had been so consumed with his ability to control the Ancient technology that she had brushed away every other concern. And considering the enemy they faced she was glad to have him around. At least with his command of the control chair they might have a slight chance to withstand an attack.
However, if she were honest with herself, she would have to admit that something about him unnerved her. She had enough experience as a diplomat to deal with the most uncooperative negotiation partner so this should not be such a difficult task to find a common ground between them. Why then did she always loose her cool whenever he challenged her? She did not need his approval of every decision she made.
But she craved it.
Which could become a huge problem.