Archive of Our Own ^beta

There was something peaceful about Earthen nature.

On Cybertron, everything was much sharper. Flowers opening up towards the sun had petals with points sharper than some warriors’ spears. The feel of the surface oftentimes shook metal with the sudden glitch. Colors that persisted were neon, guiding Cybertronians when the breem got too late. As if there were lanterns everywhere around.

On Earth, however, everything was so soft, round and even more importantly, fragile . The grass tickled when touched, the trees had a mighty girth to them. There was nothing Soundwave would substitute for his dear Cybertron but this was… Surprisingly pleasant. It was no secret that nature was such a big culprit from the Earth songs. Nothing surprising, of course, since the Cybertronian musicians did exactly the same with theirs.

It’d been almost enticing to see just how much the Earth had changed since they got here. How the tree sprouted higher and new flowers bloomed, spreading an aroma he hadn’t experienced in any of the visited worlds. All this and more in what felt like a duration of a flash of the front lights in vehicle alt modes.

Closing off his optics, Soundwave could feel the ages of inspirations flowing through his lines, a newfound peace in the ever-present chaos.

Until there was a thud.

“Hey!!! Why the scrap would you do that for!?”

“Meh. I was bored of this stupid trip.”

“Oh, yeah? Well, I’m bored too, so maybe I’ll get your face to meet my piledrivers!”

“Don’t even try it, nerd!”

Soundwave stopped. It was a matter of micro kliks until the sounds of Rumble and Frenzy’s fight got to him. Directly by his audial Laserbeak chirped and started pecking at his cannon. By his pede, Ravage already started clawing her way on his metal. Just a single moment was all that Soundwave asked for. But with his bunch it was rarely an option.

So he ex-vented heavily and took a careful step not to  do anything to Ravage, Soundwave took both cassetticons by the scruffs of their necks.

“Rumble. Frenzy. Cease this,” he said with the flattest tone he could.

“What! C’mon, Soundwave, she started it!” Waving his legs, Rumble already wanted to get out.

To which Frenzy took out her claws, “And I can end this too if Soundwave– Uh. Soundwave?”

But he didn’t budge. Didn’t even move an inch. Didn’t say a single word. Instead, he stood up, looking at them both with the sense of authority they both were too familiar with. The sun casted a shadow on his faceplate in a way that only his visor could blare red at all of his companions. 

In his spark, he could feel that wave of embarrassment and guilt washing over them. Underneath his mask, Soundwave smiled. Their spark bond never lied.

“Sheesh. Okay, sorry, Rum-Tum,” sheepishly, Frenzy apologized.

“Yyyeahh. Sorry too, Frenz.”

Only afterwards did Soundwave put them both down. With them, the specific tactics didn’t matter. If it worked it worked.

Finally, they could move along on their stroll through the valley. When both Rumble and Frenzy picked up their equipment, Soundwave was certain the tail end of their journey wouldn’t be filled with many troubles. Instead, he could see the differences in nature's wonders, listen to what humans called “birds singing” (quite similar to how machines sang, how curious) and definitely not think of anything worth stressing over.

“Actually,” Rumble started again, fixing up the giant fishing rod in his servos, “Why are we even here? Couldn’t you do it yourself and leave us on Cybertron?”

Agreeing, Laserbeak squawked before diving in to match others’ point of view. The cassetticon solidarity had always been a greater force than what he was able to say. Still, Soundwave had to play his own cards, no matter how little he had.

“I was sure you all enjoy walks when you can. Don’t complain about the subspace again,” said Soundwave, already used to all of their disputes against him. “Not to mention, your enjoyment of the fishing trip and playing by the lake could compensate for the weight of the equipment.”

“That’s not fair! Not when we have to carry some stupid garbage for your date .”

His optics got bigger. How he thanked Primus that no one else saw.

Right where her split spark ended, Frenzy picked it up, “You really think we’re gonna stay for you trying to seduce that Autoboob leader? No way, boss, we’re all staying in the subspace, even if your spark yammers our audials off.”

Once more, Soundwave felt as if his record scratched on a particularly embarrassing note. Even worse, they all probably felt that too.

“The war has ended. There are no more sides. He has helped us all.”

Such a statement, no matter how redundant, was possibly the most neutral thing he could’ve said at that point. Except the last thing. This was something truly only his spark was able to say.

The doubt within him started to subside, as Galvatron’s orders became more nonsensical with each solar-cycle. Ones that were full of self-fulfilling glory, words that made little to no sense and the constant dismissal of his troops had strained even the most loyal subjects. One of such being Soundwave. The questions of why and how more often than not were asked in the midst of private Decepticon meetings. Especially since Galvatron chose the road of solitude, not even needing a single Cybertronian in his army.

Then one solar-cycle, at the brink of his own powers, Galvatron challenged the young Autobot leader. All by himself.

Fighting with Optimus Prime was nothing new for Megatron. However, Galvatron wasn’t prepared for the fight with his successor, Rodimus Prime. With his quick thinking and nimble movement, he outsmarted his opponent at any given turn to strike. And in the end, Galvatron didn’t yield. In the last moment of  desperation, he couldn’t admit defeat. Instead, in front of everyone’s optics, he had revealed his spark, ripped it away and with his last ex-vent crushed it with his own servos.

Leaving Rodimus with his pyrrhic victory of circumstance.

As the Decepticons watched their leader waste himself away, the chaos was ready to ignite. How ironic it was that the one to snuff it out was Rodimus himself? With his servo out for them, he offered peace and equality for everyone who joined him and obeyed the rules given. If anyone disturbed the peace between them, they were sure to be thrown into cells or banished. Though still stirred, most of the Decepticons chose the former, tired of the constant fighting that was further and further away from the Decepticon way.

It wouldn’t be fair to make a decision and not discuss it with the cassetticons. There could be disagreements and differences, yet they were all connected within that bond. However, this time around, Soundwave was certain of this step for them and the cassettes joined him in. Thus Soundwave agreed to take Rodimus’ servo. The rest was history.

“Look, I know an’ stuff but seriously? Rodimus Prime?” Rumble scoffed, “Are you that bored with the peacetime? Get a hobby, Soundwave.”

“I am in the process of getting one,” he answered, his shoulders appearing ever so firmer. “What if it is fishing.”

Feeling them all think about this way too much, Soundwave already knew he had gained that upper servo on them all. Whatever would keep his circuits steady when it came to meeting Rodimus was good enough. Or maybe, the cassetticons were right on their assessment of the feeling dug within his processors.

Soundwave wasn’t sure. The only thing he had no doubts of was that next to Rodimus Prime, his own spark felt… Warm. Something he possibly had never truly felt with anyone else.

“Meh, I mean I guess it’s fitting for ya? If not just turbo boring, even at that,” thinking really hard about this, Rumble tapped the edge of his enstril.

His own most sound decision was possibly to not think too hard about the last part. But even if he was ready to go forward, their speculations were far from other.

“No, hold on! Are you seriously giving up that easily, Rumble!?” Frenzy’s heightened vocoder delivered another observation. “You can’t fool me, Soundwave. Ravage is even carrying Rodimus’ favorite grilled energon sandwiches. And I know it only because you keep mentioning it!”

This sort of evidence was for damning. Somewhere beside him, Ravage let out a short mewl but still bravely carried the basket. Even doing as much to rub her head against Soundwave’s lower leg. Fortunately, such accusations also had a way out.

Still appearing unfazed, Soundwave looked to the side, “Laserbeak also likes them.” Calling him in, Laserbeak nodded in agreement before once more landing on his shoulder.

“That’s why you packed so many?”

“Cannot convince me you will not eat them too.”

He just knew that behind her visor, Frenzy had to blink several times. Then with a groan, she agreed, “Okay, fiiiine. You win.”

Giving them all a quick, yet deafening nod, Soundwave truly pleaded that would be enough for them to stop their licentious theories. Of course, he knew them too well. Hence it was just wishful thinking but one nonetheless. As he certainly didn’t want to talk with cassetticons about what was between him and Rodimus Prime.

The truth was that he himself didn’t want to have this synthesizer solo written out.

Maybe it was outlandish to say but Soundwave was always curious about Rodimus. It could’ve been that he had caught him in such a peculiar moment of his lifespan, torn apart by his doubts. While Galvatron spewed venom about his opponent, for him it only created the most unexpected mixture of hatred and fascination. One that almost made him ashamed of a mere thought of Rodimus Prime. Yet, he couldn’t help it. He simply did.

It probably only heightened as Galvatron was no more.

Nothing in this world would make Soundwave do a thing against his cassetticons. Their wellbeing was his priority, their loyalty his most important factor. But in a backwards way, he knew Rodimus wouldn’t possibly do anything against him . The lunar cycle when he could sense his cassettes wondering what exactly was Rodimus’ own goal, Soundwave had spent learning more about him.

Afterall, it was Rodimus who offered him a servo. The one who suggested him a job by his side, who wasn’t afraid of what he was capable of. His past of a ruthless third in command had not much on being a diligent, loyal worker. When other Decepticons filled the spaces and Rodimus himself never talked down to his cassettes, Soundwave agreed. Like so he had spent more time with him, learning him through. It was when Soundwave realized with someone like Rodimus, it was impossible to get to know him just via second servo accounts. He was the mere definition of a surprise at every corner.

Especially, since it was him who invited him on a fishing trip. Peculiar idea but with his own intrigue, Soundwave couldn’t find it in himself to say no.

In the distance, he was able to spot a lone red leaf blown off the tree by the wind. Last moments of summer slipping away from his digittips. Why did the changing of Earthen seasons made him this nostalgic, Soundwave couldn’t tell. The grass was still green, the skies were still blue and they’d be like that for a long while. Yet the presage of Fall taking its place was creeping into his processors.

Suddenly, he could feel a thud. This time around one of the metal wing right at his helm. Looking at Laserbeak with a grievance only he was able to tell, in return he had heard a loud squawk. Still confused (and with the noises of Rumble and Frenzy trying to mask their snickering), Soundwave turned around to the further point of the meadow.

Right where Ravage was currently chasing off a small Earth rodent. However they were called, anyway.

Without a second thought, Soundwave sprinted towards his pouncing Ravage and appeared behind her in the record time. Before she could let out but a small mewl, he already captured her right underneath her pits. That was when a loud, disapproving meow escaped her mouth. All while, he could only ex-vent exasperated.

Of course , she already tried to wriggle herself away. Yet Soundwave remained unphased, “Desist, Ravage. Not being able to behave results in being carried all the way to the destination.”

No matter how pathetic were the noises she made and how many times had she bitten his servos, Soundwave didn’t budge for even a micro-klik. All while everyone else seemed to have just the greatest time making fun of him. With a sharp motion, Soundwave looked at them with a death glare-like visor.

“Haha boss, since when has your spark become an energon gummy?” Asked Rumble, not muffling his laughter anymore.

“Yeah, it’s softer than those Earthy pillows!” Frenzy pointed out. Even Laserbeak as he landed on her head started to chuckle, moving his wings up and down.

Soundwave tilted his helm ever so slightly, ignoring Ravage currently gnawing on his digit-thumb, “Explain.”

“Oh, c’mon, boss, don’t play dumb on us!” Rumble’s brow ridges rose as far as they could. “If it was you from like several vorns you wouldn’t bat an optic on Rav just massacring any Earth life form. Admit it, you started caring about nature too much.”

“I do not–“

“Yeah!” Echoed Frenzy, nodding her helm. Couldn’t they agree on quite possibly any different matter? “And not only this, this is just one of maaany things. Like the way you have been talking more at the meetings with Rodimus…”

“…And going on field trips more on your own. I can tell you’re not going on missions, I mean we all would’ve picked up on that,” kept at it Rumble, almost trying to elbow his split spark. “Also Earth music! Why do you care about it so much, anyway? You never liked when I listened to Huey Lewis.”

“Huey Lewis sucks , you yuppie scum, at least he’s listening to Run DMC. Anyways, as dumb as Rumble is, he’s got a point,” almost right back, Frenzy elbowed him too. To then wonder about it all with her pointing digit tapping at her chin. “There’s also, uh… You guys know…”

Right at their spark bond, Soundwave could sense their sudden agreement. Hearing Laserbeak’s silent squawk, everything became a bit too clear. Without a word spoken out loud, Soundwave preferred to remain silent.

“We all know you care but… The way it’s been, it’s, uh… Not that we mind that much, it’s just… It’s more than usual. Not like in front of Megatron or Galvatron.”

Still, Soundwave didn’t seem to give her the response she had wanted. It was plain obvious what they’ve all been wondering about. Yet his own vocoder couldn’t say it out loud. Did he really care about them more than before? Frenzy was right, he had always cared but did it become bothersome? Has he overstepped any of their borders?

Were they afraid to tell him?

Possibly in the most backwards way and at least in part, Soundwave remained himself. With his spark, he sent them a message of caring and calm waves. In front of their Decepticon leaders it was oftentimes the only way to reassure them all. This time, however, did he do this to prove a point or out of his own fear? Maybe there was something else entirely he had feared.

Sending a silent thankful message too, Frenzy then cleared her vocoder and started again, “Even this fishing trip, you wouldn’t give a scrap or two about this before. But now you go along with it and you listen to Rodimus yapping about the protection of lifeforms or whatever he’s talking about…  I dunno, Soundwave. Is it the lack of Galvatron? Or is it the war?”

“Or maybe you actually do like Rodimus a bit too much for your own liking. You gotta admit lots of these changes kinda seem more like him than you are. Or at least being influenced by that punk,” teased Rumble. “Either way, somethin’s wrong. Like super wrong, y’know. You’ve changed.”

The last words of the cassetticon especially rang in his processors. No matter how much Soundwave didn’t want to show his flusterment, he was sure everyone already knew. Especially Ravage, since his grip on her tightened considerably.

Has he truly changed that much? Soundwave couldn’t tell. The circumstances and their way of living definitely did but it wasn’t that he himself had changed. At least not as fundamentally as they figured. Taking steps across the late summer meadow, Soundwave looked down to notice his pedes moving along. Were his legs and pedes the same as before or were his optics having a malfunction? No, it was still him, still him, no matter what, it was still the same Soundwave who was right there, at the war, during the war, it was all him.

Trying to take a sneaky look in their direction, Soundwave wanted to catch a glimpse of his companions. No, nothing had happened, his cassettes were still there with him. Would they still be there later? Doubt spread across his spark. Maybe he truly did become overbearing in his requests and care for them. But no, he still was just the same. His relationship with the cassettes was like during the good old times with Megatron. The sky was blue, the grass was green, Rumble and Frenzy quarreled, Ravage bit him, Laserbeak watched in amusement.

Nothing had changed, nothing about his cassettes, nothing about him , that was for a fact.

The true new thing in his life could be… Rodimus Prime. That was undeniable. Yet definitely not in a way Rumble had discerned. There couldn’t be anything different about him and Rodimus, could there be? No matter for how long he could’ve recalled, Soundwave was loyal to a leader. Without Galvatron, someone had to take the place of his superior, that was how life went. The fact that it was Rodimus had nothing on his personal feelings towards him. Afterall, he was the leader of the Autobots or Cybertronians in general. Whatever. Nothing else.

Not even with his bluer than crystal lakes optics, or his laughter sweeter than any melody he had heard. Not with his wheels doing another round across the facility just to prove Blurr a point. Not with the way he listened to Soundwave’s music so eagerly and then tapped his digits to those beats when Ultra Magnus went on for too long. Not with his charming smile and his chivalrous mixed with spunky attitude. Nothing of that sort. Rodimus Prime was simply his new leader, that was that.

A smaller servo tapped on the side of his leg. One belonging to Rumble, “Look alive, Soundwave, here he comes. Pull on your best good old fashioned lover-mech.”

In the ever smaller distance, a figure was visible. The orange and magenta colors one by one making up a mech who started it all. With that plastered denta-filled grin and servo waving at them, Rodimus Prime awaited eagerly, wielding a fishing rod and his own picnic basket.

Oh, the static that spread within him was most definitely felt by them all.

“ Behave ,” hissed Soundwave. Much to his own annoyance, of course, the cassettes snickered again.

“Sure thing, boss, on our best behaviors,” barely muffling the laughter, Rumble nodded.

And Soundwave just waved his servo. No time to pay their jokes too much processor space. It was time to show his own best self to Rodimus. In a way.

Taking those steps on the hill Rodimus was standing on, he could feel even more static coming through him. The gentle wind swayed and the sun shone behind him in almost an afterglow way. His right servo exchanged further for him, helping him step up. Along with the smile on his faceplate, though ever-present then became softer.

“Hi Soundwave,” he spoke with almost a dreamy quality to his vocoder. Soundwave didn’t hesitate twice to take his servo. Suddenly though, Rodimus looked behind him and with a cheery tone said, “And hiii Rumble, Frenzy, Laserbeak and Ravage too.”

“’Sup,” Frenzy nodded her helm, a bit too much.

“Yello,” Rumble then showed him a horned sign, taking out his glossa.

“Greetings, Rodimus Prime,” said Soundwave and then realizing Ravage was still wriggling in his arms, he put her down. “Apologies for the delay.”

If Soundwave even looked behind him, he probably would’ve spotted the cassettes all sharing both disapproving and vexed looks between each other. Their spark bond too was so perfectly then hidden from him, he couldn’t suspect a thing. Definitely not while looking into Rodimus’ optics.

“Nooo, not a problem, didn’t wait too long, hah,” he waved his servo dismissively, shaking his massive shoulder pads in a laugh. “Ready for an awesome adventure to be remembered?”

Thrill spread across his spark, not even able to sustain his own emotions. Why was it all exciting him this much, he had no idea. Especially why did the sudden look at Rodimus made everything within him so conflicted. Hoping that soon his doubts would be over, Soundwave only looked at his cassettes, all ready for what was in store.

“Affirmative.”

“Now – come look at this. And I mean it, look very closely.”

He didn’t have to say it twice to Soundwave. With all the bits of patience he had, his optics focused on Rodimus’ nimble yet precise digits. If usually his movements were all over the place, hectic and almost unfocused, this time his sensors worked at the highest capacity. Like it was defending the Autobot headquarters on Cybertron.

“Y’see, if you push it too far, the maggot will end up in their throats. Buuut if you push it just enough so the skin sticks – a fish both swallows it and catches on the hook. That’s a win-win in my opinion,” Rodimus concluded his demonstration and turned to flash a huge smile at Soundwave. “Easy, right?”

“Your assumption is correct,” Soundwave agreed, trying to record every bit and piece of the presented information.

“Heh, I knew you’d get it in no time! C’mon, try it for yourself.”

Giving him a quick nod, Soundwave focused then on the whole bucket of maggot Rodimus had prepared before. Bracing each circuit on his motherboard, his servo then dove into the deep end. Of course, he didn’t have to go that far but a part of the challenge was to convince Rodimus he was cut out to do this. With a more sturdy push, he took a whole servoful of maggots and looked at them. Ready to find out their secrets buried in their small brain modules. Of sorts, that was.

“Woah!” As his optics became bigger, Rodimus turned his full attention to the scene. His servo clutched at Soundwave’s frame, almost as if fire on cold metal. “Don’t think we’ll need so many! Try, uh, two or three, maybe?”

Soundwave’s brow ridge rose, “False. With more maggots, the size of the fish also has to increase.”

“I’m not sure if that–“ he wanted to explain it shortly, however with Soundwave’s crooked and oh, how intimidating look, it was completely fruitless. “Okay, okay, you’re right! Yay, more maggots.”

“You are not too enthusiastic about this.”

“Who? Me? Please , Soundwave. Like you wouldn’t know me,” though Rodimus’ tone was very much sarcastic, everything within Soundwave still shook with indescribable feelings.

Yes, that was true. He did know Rodimus Prime, in a way. A very enticing and unexpected way.

Right as they were, both sitting down at the cold Earthen ground, there was no chance that he’d ever get used to this. Whatever “this” was anyway. It might’ve been how Soundwave couldn’t get used to the Earth atmosphere, still wishing his beloved Cybertronian clouds could follow him wherever he went. Or was it actually Rodimus’ presence that made his circuits loop around themselves? The truth was that he couldn’t focus on the smallest things like the lake as reflective as a metal plating or nature sounds, far from metallic. All this seemed miniscule compared to what Rodimus made him feel.

Even his movements, usually so precise and perfectly put together, weren't on par with his own standards. When Rodimus was this close, his processors got muddy with too many love songs he had saved on his drive. His sight went away to his curved frame, as the sight of it made his own diodes burn as bright as ever. As if when Rodimus Prime was close, the whole world stopped mattering. How much Soundwave hated that distorted touch to his actions, he couldn’t admit

Yet, he hated looking away from Rodimus’ diligent tries even more.

Still, he had to stay true to his firm stance and intellectual approach. Which sometimes took things further than he had preferred. However, Soundwave followed the directions to the t and soon enough showed his hook full of maggots, “Accomplished.”

“Lemme… Oh, yeah, good work, Soundwave!” He showed him a thumb-digit up. Soundwave could’ve sworn his spark sang. “Aaalright, our next step is to… Well, it’s time to catch some fish!”

That was enough for Soundwave to know his cue. With his servos firm on the fishing rod, he was ready to swing it forwards and showcase his newfound fishing skills. Which he obviously had to have before. Focusing on the deep, he could already feel the fresh water and scales on his own plating. In his own processors, he could see the showcase of the wonder on all the faceplates, from Rodimus to his cassettes. Thanks to Soundwave’s strong servos the lithe rod swayed towards the other side of the lake. As the line went above his head, he could feel the success of casting at his digittips.

“Soundwave, wait, no!” Suddenly shouted Rodimus. What did he–

Sharper pull revealed to him all the needed truth, as the hook attached to the sides of Soundwave’s imitation battery space. The tug was enough for it to let go of him. As well as making a sizable tear on his plating. Not to mention making Soundwave bite down a yelp of pain.

“Nice one, boss!” Somewhere in the distance, Rumble cheered. Other cassettes echoed his enthusiasm.

All while Soundwave wanted to simply scream that damn dent away.

“Ough… Everything good?” The only one who saw through the distant façade was Rodimus, already approaching him. With a tone so protective, Soundwave almost thought his perfect hearing suddenly became faulty. “If you want, I-I have a welder with me for emergencies, I can help you out!“

Though from the outside perspective nothing about him had changed, it was only then when Soundwave’s optics opened up again. Behind his visor, his sight focused on Rodimus Prime only. Everything within Soundwave fought so hard not to take this much note of his servo on his own back. A bit lower than he would’ve expected, if he was being honest. All while he wished that Rodimus went even lower.

The shifted focus didn’t do Soundwave’s troubled processors many favors. Not when Rodimus’ blue optics looked at him with care he hadn’t experienced in forever. They glistened with a certain kind of blue, one deep enough to drown in. His faceplate so close to him, his dermas almost next to his own, his whole self was just within his reach. And the touch that burnt almost as brightly as Rodimus himself did.

It was no use, Soundwave knew it. His descent to reality was akin to a mighty fall.

“Everything is optimal,” hiding any troubles of his, Soundwave spoke. “Besides – you do not want to miss any more fish.”

“Says who?”

“Says me.”

“Well, spy master. There are things even I can wait an eternity for,” not buying what Soundwave had been selling, Rodimus raised his brow ridge and slid his servo off of his back. A weird frost overwhelmed the place where Soundwave felt him a mere klik before.

Instead of going away, Rodimus moved himself to his unpresuming fishing box. Before Soundwave could question him, he pushed one button on it. Just this one motion managed to shift it to become a med kit. As Soundwave saw him take a welder, he himself examined the box with a curious look.

Of course, it didn’t pass by Rodimus’ attention, “Neat, huh? Lifeline showed First Aid some Paradron engineering and here you have the magic before your optics.” Seeing Soundwave still looking at it in interest, he put his free servo on his hip and asked, “Permission?”

To which Soundwave ex-vented. Damn pulsating pain.

“Granted.”

With the access of sorts, he kneeled right behind him, powering up the welder. Bracing himself for the impact, Soundwave’s derma pressed hard onto one another. Yet the only thing that occurred was… Relief. Another ex-vent he took was one of acceptance. He wanted to spare him a look, to see another form of focus on Rodimus’ features. Yet a part of him was thankful that it wasn’t possible.

Maybe he wasn’t bound to see any of this. Especially him in that different light.

“How is it, huh? Feeling better?”

Soundwave remained silent. And Rodimus could only laugh at such a confession.

“Are you always this stubborn?” He asked, feeling another tingle of the welder against his plating.

Stopping for a kilik, Rodimus took a step forward to look at him. Right then he didn’t have to imagine that cocky smile of his. Instead, he could see it, closer than he had ever allowed himself to. With that little curl to his derma and the bliss behind his optics. One thing Soundwave realized immediately – the real thing was much better than what his imagination had shown him before.

As he put his servo against his cheek, Rodimus asked, “I could ask you the same thing, Waves.”

Just one word and it was enough to make himself spike up in attention. Enough to make Rodimus notice, anyway.

“ Waves ?”

“What, you’ve never gotten a nickname before?” When Soundwave wordlessly looked at him with a still confused faceplate, Rodimus’ optics got even bigger. Solemnly and still in shock nodding, he went back to his cooled off welder. “Damn, I had no idea that you were so… Never mind, actually. No nicknames… Well, if you ask me, bots have been giving me all sorts of nicknames. Arcee usually says Ra-Rod which is pretty alright but Springer? Ugh, she calls me Rodder! Says that it’s for our names to match but gah, I hate it. I know she knows but eh, she likes to spite me, even now. So when she’s not leading the Wreckers, I give her the worst duty of prepping bottled energon with Ultra Magnus, who, by the way, is very particular about this. But hey, sucks to suck, Springer,” suddenly, Soundwave could feel the welder lift away from his plating. Possibly he’d be able to guess his expression too. “Agh, sorry, speaking of Magnus, he keeps saying I’m not… I’m not focused enough and I say way too much. Hope I didn’t bore you to deactivation with my constant yapping. Heh.”

He shouldn’t extend his power to feel his spark. There was no reason for him to break those boundaries and see what he had felt. Though in his limited understanding, he could sense that it still was… Something that hurt Rodimus. Then welding continued.

In the past, Soundwave wouldn’t pay the unnecessary noises any processor space but this time it definitely didn’t feel so superfluous. Far from it, actually. As if he was granted to see a part of Rodimus he himself had to conceal all the public speaking manners. Right then, Rodimus Prime was just himself, comfortable enough to share his own way, not polished by Ultra Magnus’ tips.

In all honesty, Soundwave simply liked what he had been picking up on. A musical of words and visuals.

“No. I want to listen.”

“You first, probably,” with that silent confession, at least he could hear the smile on his dermas appearing again. “Well, anyway, don’t you want to give me one now?”

“No. Rodimus Prime.”

“Suit yourself. But if my name sounded like you say it every time, I wouldn’t be too mad to only hear this.”

Soundwave’s senses sharpened exponentially. Yet Rodimus didn’t elaborate it in the slightest. What was even stranger, he didn’t say another word for the remainder of the repair work. Finally, he could feel the welder lifting off and a slight brush off Rodimus’ servo against that sensitive spot. One that almost made him malfunction again.

“Aaaand here you go. Good as new.”

“You have my thanks,” concealing anything that happened inside him was usually easier than this. Still, there was a doubt at the back of his processors, “I have a question for you.”

“Ask away, ‘m not stopping you,” Rodimus sounded ever so nonchalantly.

The words ready to be spoken out suddenly got stuck at the box of Soundwave’s vocoder. He had observed Rodimus moving away to the box, changing it again to contain the fishing gear. Whistling a cheery tune, he started preparing his own hook. Nothing too outlandish about it. But amidst something so unusual.

“You were not a medibot before your Primehood. How did you know how to repair me?” He asked, losing even the fleeting optic-contact with his fishing rod.

Such a question startled Rodimus a little, making him look away from the hook. Apparently, it was already assembled, as with a swift movement, he took a place to sit right by Soundwave’s side. All while he simply observed him, looking for an answer within his stare. Yet there was nothing he could read.

“Y’know I could tell you that most Autobots have even the smallest amount of medical training but… You wouldn’t really care, would you?” Almost nudging him, he turned to his side.

“Correct,” agreed Soundwave, the demanded social cues be damned.

“See? That’s fair. Just how I wouldn’t believe myself. Didn’t pay too much attention to these, anyway,” despite the laughter, within Rodimus’ vocoder there was a tinge of nostalgia he wasn’t expecting to hear. Not that he couldn’t relate to this, anyway. Everything was easier when Optimus Prime and Megatron fought each other until deactivation. “Who really pushed me towards it was Kup.”

Noticing a sneaky side-stare Rodimus gave him, he looked right back at him. No matter how small the action was, Soundwave knew it was enough to show him he listened. 

“I know most would expect Ultra Magnus and his perfectionist but if he’s the reason, Kup is the rhyme. He was… Always by my side, teaching me to become the best bot I can be. They both did but with Kup, he is y’know, much more about combat, being a veteran and stuff. Well, Magnus is one too but his aft is permanently glued to the desk,” Rodimus smiled to himself, looking into the distance. In all this, Soundwave didn’t even notice his fishing line was already in the water. “But eh, don’t tell him I said it but Kup is an old timer. His joints fall apart more than he’d want to admit, so just so he wouldn’t have to constantly lie to First Aid, I picked up the basics of medical training. Whenever he needs it, I do it and never mention it afterwards. Think he prefers it this way.”

Not looking away from him, within the words, Soundwave had noticed another peculiar thing. This time around, Rodimus didn’t stop or outright ask him if talking this much was good. He didn’t have to question his allegiance, in maybe a backwards way, he trusted him.

And Soundwave knew he had to ask, “Do you prefer this way?”

Shifting in the chair, Rodimus gave it a slightly longer time to think about, “Guess it’s less about what I prefer. When you care about someone you’re ready to take that extra step, do things you wouldn’t really do on your own. C’mon, Soundwave, we both know there’s no way in the Dark Spark I’d give a damn about medical studies. But saving Kup… I know he’ll always have my back. The least I can do is look after him. I don’t know… Hope I’m making sense.”

For him, it couldn’t have been clearer, “The victim of circumstance.”

“Ehh, I wouldn’t call it being a “victim”. It’s more of something that is bigger than you could ever become. Has to be someone for who you’d do it to, right?”

Once more, the silence fell between them. Though Rodimus’ question could very easily be one of metaphorical matter, it did have a clear cut answer. His servos shifted on the rod and his helm ever so slightly tipped in the direction of the cassettes.

All of them relaxing, having their own type of fun. Ravage took a nap by the nearby tree, while Laserbeak started to go around the field to catch any worms. It didn’t matter that they weren’t made out of energon, he just liked the thrill of getting the smallest victim. Rumble was the closest to the lake, splashing water around and humming a new song. Meanwhile, Frenzy climbed those trees, one by one, scaring the critters. From their bond, Soundwave could feel they enjoyed their time and that they were… So surprisingly calm. Something he wasn’t aware they could even feel. But it was just what they deserved.

“Oh. I understand.”

Like the sound of the lighter snuffing out, he could hear Rodimus’ vocoder, treading carefully. In all probability, his whisper wasn’t meant to be heard by him. It simply wasn’t the most sensible thing to assume when the mech by his side was known to be able to hear even the smallest noises.

So Soundwave spared him a look again. With anyone else, he knew he’d be safe continuing to simply let himself be. If they judged, they still couldn’t tell who exactly he was underneath his battle mask.

Not with Rodimus Prime. Not when he read him like a music sheet.

At first, he had wanted to let it slide and catch the fishes that Rodimus so desperately wanted to. Yet for the first time in his lifetime, silence was deafening for Soundwave. Everything had its place, both sound and silence. Without one the other had no meaning. Intertwined forever in a dance between lovers, Soundwave appreciated them both. But the silence coming from Rodimus didn’t suit him. No matter how hard he had brushed off the questions from before.

Finally, he spoke, not in a way Soundwave had anticipated, “You’re doing a good job, y’know, Soundwave? Steady servos, optics on the spot, just don’t fiddle around with the reel and you’ll catch a great trophy.”

“Rodimus Prime,” almost exasperated, Soundwave spoke but of his name. He knew that it had to be enough.

And it was.

“I’ve said enough. If you don’t want me to butt in, I won’t peep a word,” with a free servo, Rodimus almost reinforced that distance between them. A painful one at that, “I say a lot of dumb scrap and I don’t want you to be another victim of my loudmouth. Not when… I’m not forcing you to do anything you don’t wanna right now.”

One motion was enough to shut Rodimus up. That was in fact the grip of Soundwave’s servo right where the exhaust pipes on his arms ended. Once more, they shared a look.

“Understood,” said Soundwave and then lifted up his servo to point at the cassettes. “Everything I can, I do for them.”

That was when Rodimus’ optics softened. The confession was enough to make his thoughts clearer. At least in a way. He didn’t interrupt, just nodded silently and signalized Soundwave to keep going. Only if he so desired.

Maybe he had been hiding it in his spark for too long.

“Before the war, I found the cassettes on Cybertron. They were stranded, all alone. I took them in,” Soundwave’s melodic tones became more hushed with each word. Though for his knowledge, the cassettes already knew. “When the war started, they were all I had. When we joined Megatron, we worked for him together. When Galvatron fell, I only thought about what it meant for them.”

“Even switching to the Autobot side?”

“Yes. It was our decision,” admitted Soundwave. “I was always their harbor. Their guide and protector. I commanded them and in return, they defended me. Galvatron is no more – the search for a new leader had to begin. It was how it’s always been.”

“And when it’s all… Gone?”

“I think about the cassettes first. Always.”

There was nothing else he could have said regarding it. Hence his sight once more focused on the vastness of the blue lake before them. The glistening surface reminded him of the crystal cities they were rebuilding back on Cybertron, just with different hues. So close, yet so far away. Not to mention, the way water slightly ruffled around.

Pondering the same space, Rodimus bent his back a little. He let out a low hum and said, “Guess I know exactly what you mean by that.”

Concealing his surprise, Soundwave demanded, “Elaborate.”

“I know, gotta be a shock or something, heh… But if you know Daniel, him and I are pretty dang close. He looked up to me, showed me a lot of things. Even fishing, that was all him,” with memories of Daniel, Rodimus’ faceplate brightened up again. “I kind of grew to think about him as my own family and I protected him with my entire spark. But it’s different now, when he’s not around.”

“Destination?”

“College. Something humans do to learn more, kind of like academies,” taking another servoful of maggots, Rodimus tossed it back into the water. A bit more encouragement wouldn’t hurt any of the fish. “He’s not that little boy who saw me become a Prime anymore… Now he studies history to understand life better. Learn from the past to understand the future better, at least that was what he’d told me. Guess I’ll never stop thinking about him as that wide-eyed kid I told bedtime stories to. I know he’ll never forgive me for this, hah. Really, what gives. I had to let him go.”

A part of him truly did understand the nostalgia that suddenly overwhelmed Rodimus’ entire being. Longing for the things from the past, the stories woven years ago. With humans it had to be much more drastic than with cassettes. Their lifetimes for them felt like mere kliks. Yet Soundwave couldn’t help but to wonder about the lives of his dear cassettes and who they had become to him. Of course, belittling their opinions was never something acceptable but… How was it with letting go?

As if Rodimus had gotten used to letting go of things in his life, hence he accommodated so easily. In his own spark, Soundwave feared that he himself had gotten used to things staying exactly as they were much more than acceptably.

The ripples forming on the water’s surface had become increasingly more frequent. With his senses as sharpened as they could be, his grip on the fishing rod tightened.

“Eeeh, either way,” with a wave, Rodimus shrugged his impressively big shoulder pads. One that Soundwave had always gazed upon with admiration. “I wanted to say that you’re treating cassettes well. I myself was forced into the leader role but you? You’re a natural!”

Startled a little, Soundwave’s brow ridge rose, “In my opinion you’re a good leader.”

“Thanks, heh. But trust me, I was worse. Way waaay worse, just ask Springer,” which he said, punctuated with a laugh. Only to quickly end it and ex-vent, preparing for the next confession. “I don’t know how to say it… Optimus gave me the Matrix when I thought I wasn’t prepared, just stumbling around, making scrap up as I could. I never thought I’d be half as good of a leader as he was. Just wallowing around, afraid I’m not the successor he had wanted. It was actually Galvatron who made me see through all this. I realized – if he never changed, could I become just like him?”

There was no need to be a sparkreader to understand what Rodimus Prime had in his processors. The incredible burden of leadership, the sudden shift in his whole life, one that happened as quickly as the force of devouring flames. The Decepticons at first welcomed Galvatron with open servos. With Rodimus, Soundwave was sure it couldn’t be this easy, as even Autobots had their objections of sorts. He had heard bots gossiping about him, calling him by his older name to disrespect his leadership. In spite of all of this, Rodimus persisted in who he was, ruling Cybertron in his unique and fair way.

The question of his leadership had a clear answer, Soundwave knew that. Undoubtedly, he had valued his skills and he knew cassettes did think just the same. To even think about disrespecting his legacy should be like scoffing at Optimus’ decision. But all this came with a sacrifice of who he was.

How Soundwave wished he had known Hot Rod better than passing stares during the battle.

Suddenly, his thoughts had been forcibly cut short. The line at Soundwave’s fishing rod shook, as the fish finally bit. Tug at the whole device almost swayed his whole frame. As well as his optics behind the visor got so round, he thanked all the Primes that Rodimus wasn’t able to see.

“No way! Your first fish, way to go, Soundwave!” Instead of any improper comment, Rodimus praised him with a smile.

Well, in any other circumstance…

In the distance Rumble whistled right back at him, “Wooh, you go, boss!”

“Yeah, show ‘em who’s the boss, boss!” Echoed Frenzy, clapping to it.

“Rodimus Prime–!” melodic tones of Soundwave’s vocoder then sounded disjointed and desperate. Or he heard it from his own audials, it was a pathetic mix of both.

“Oh!” Proud and laidback at first, Rodimus jumped in place at the sound of his own name. He then scooted closer with his chair, “Okay, okay, okay, stay calm and I’ll walk you through it, alright?”

Behind his battle mask, Soundwave gritted his denta, “When am I not?”

“Easy, killer whale, don’t break your records,” said Rodimus. Even more so, Soundwave didn’t know how to approach it. “Alright, alright, you will need to reel it in carefully. Can I touch you?”

The energon in his lines simmered, “Yes.”

To which Rodimus nodded. Then almost like a burst of colors, his servos reached Soundwave to help him retrieve the fish.

Beyond the surprise of anyone, save it for himself asking if it was possible, the sensation of Rodimus’ touch was almost indescribable. Of course, as a Prime, his strength had the force multiplied than one of a regular Cybertronian. Beyond that, it was simply unlike anything else he had experienced. What especially captured Soundwave was the sudden warmth. It didn’t even require the heat wave he had unexplainably felt whenever Rodimus was nearby. Nor the blast of flames through his exhaust pipes. Instead, it was the subtle and pleasant warmth of his servos touching his own. As if a torch lit him the way.

Holding it tightly and swaying back, Soundwave instantly tried to reel his fish in. Yes, Rodimus’ steady servos were there to guide him, yet the sight of rippling waters stirred something within him. It was a chance to prove to Rodimus that all the preconceived notions were a lie. That his loyalty surely had laid within his virtues not just names. That just because he once served Megatron and Galvatron, his past allegiances weren’t prevalent anymore. That he still could be of use to Rodimus Prime.

That he could still do it all.

Hence, Soundwave stood up. Only a surprised noise from Rodimus could indicate whatever he had felt. Not that it really made its way to his own audials. Standing firmly on the ground, with every bit of strength he had, Soundwave reeled in the biting fish. His servos working overtime, his pedes not letting him move even an inch. Optics only the price. His fishing rod tipped in the direction of the water's surface, one he was ready to drown in. At least this blue would reveal to him the needed truth.

“Wait! No, no, no, no, no, don’t do that!!!”

There was no time to ask what he meant. Not when the answer unraveled before him.

It all happened so quickly, he wasn’t sure when he managed to register all of it. The sounds of fishing line splitting apart. Soundwave’s confused look upon those depths of the water. Then the force with which the line broke, which caused him to fall on his back.

The impact of the fall spread across his aching back like a rust plague.

Further away, another sound came to his audials, of cassetticons laughing the fall away. Even Laserbeak and Ravage joined in the group effort to unapologetically make fun of him.

“Soundwave!? Are you alright?”

At least, he was in the right position to see his own sunrise.

“Affirmative.”

“Oh, Primus,” ex-vented Rodimus, sounding just so drained. Yet equally controlled. “C’mere. I won’t leave you laying there.”

Like so, Rodimus exchanged his servo. Observing it for a far too long klik, Soundwave took it in his own.

Regaining his footing, Soundwave took a moment, so all of the puzzle pieces could fit together. Though Rodimus’ presence warmed his spark up, the inexplicable cause remained a mystery. His optics looked upon the waters, hoping there was a tried and true method to extract the needed information. Afterall, everything had its breaking points.

Yet it seemed like water did not. Only the reflections of sunlight falling onto it, dancing with each next ripple.

“You’re wondering about it, aren’t you?” Rodimus asked, unable to stay within that ambience for too long. Soundwave didn’t answer. Just started in the lake’s direction. “D’you want me to explain it to you?” With this question, Soundwave turned around. Still not saying a word, he stared back as if to drill a hole through him. “Alright, c’mon. No need to ask twice.”

Soundwave’s brow ridge rose. Oh, he truly was starting to get him way too well for both of their goods.

Chuckling a little, Rodimus turned around to retrieve his fishing rod. Thankfully, the whole tool didn’t fall apart. The line, however, wasn’t that lucky. Dangling off of the rod, then it only served as a decoration piece. Without the most important part, resulting in something lesser than the sum.

“See, when the fish start to bite, you can’t exactly point the tip of the fishing rod at the lake. You gotta push back cause if you don’t…” Saying so, Rodimus brushed his digits at what remained of the line and looked at Soundwave. “In short, this is what happened.”

“Acknowledged,” Soundwave nodded his helm, fascinated by the physics that went into creating this little device. “Accept my apology.”

“What for? It’s alright, I’ll just tie a new line and a hook to it and it’s ready to use again,” Rodimus shrugged and  once more went around to his fishing box. Before he could start, he turned around and with an unamused look and drawn together brow ridges said, “Don’t look at me like that. I’m not gonna throw away a perfectly good fishing rod just because of a line.”

Once more, Soundwave didn’t say a thing. Sparkdammit, it was all too much of a conundrum.

Instead, trying to sustain his curiosity, Soundwave sat down beside him. In a kilik, Rodimus had realized so and gave him another one of those warming smiles. Something that once could’ve been so annoying, then simply made him comforted against a failure. When Rodimus took the rolled up line, Soundwave’s optics almost swirled at the amount of thoughts barraging at him. Suddenly, even the grass was too damn green.

“I fail to understand.”

Surprised, Rodimus looked back at him, “What exactly, that I wanna repair it? Fishing rods don’t grow in the energon rivers, you know.”

“I fail to understand why didn’t you leave it be and get something better,” Soundwave stood even firmer. There had to be an actual reason.

“I don’t like to just throw things away. I prefer to give ‘em another go, see where it takes me. There’s nothing really gratifying about disregarding things as soon as the first problem arrives. Primus knows how much I’ve had this happen…” Closing his optics for a klik, he then fully turned around. “That’s what you mean, do you, Soundwave?”

And for the first time in his life Soundwave felt as clear as that water behind him.

Just as if Rodimus Prime himself saw right through him. Immediately understood what was wrong and did not care if admitting so was right or wrong. Only that there had to be honesty between them. One he was ready to provide.

Keeping his silence, all Soundwave could do was to wait for his next judgment. Maybe the uneasy feeling wasn’t anything out of the blue but something actually tangible. There he was, in front of the leader of the Autobots. No quick escape, as much as he had wanted.

Instead of an immediate outburst of anger, Rodimus’ dermas trembled, “Soundwave. Don’t fall into it, it’s different now. I am neither Galvatron nor Megatron.”

“I liked the way things were,” was all Soundwave was able to say.

“Did you really like ‘em? Or did you just get used to how they were?”

The pulsating ache overwhelmed his whole spark. No force in this world was enough for him to look back into Rodimus’ optics and see the disappointment in his features. There wasn’t anything else left, just that gaping hole in his chest. No matter how well he could have served another leader or how he could act on his best behavior, it still wasn’t enough.

Maybe Megatron just had gotten used to how Soundwave worked and that was why he didn’t replace him. Maybe it was all for naught and the choice was but an illusion.

Even in that moment, Soundwave couldn’t help but to conceal his weakness. His spark tried to be as calm as ever, not sending a signal back to the cassettes. He had to fight it, push it, anything so they wouldn’t sense his ache. Even without the bond, there was no need to fall apart in front of Rodimus. Not when it was going so smoothly and he had so many credentials, that he was almost respected again. Not in front of Rodimus Prime, both a leader and someone… So extraordinary. Someone who started to mean more to him.

However much he tried, Rodimus was still right by him. Though his servos didn’t reach his chassis, the hovering warmth of them was present as it always had been. Almost touched. Just not quite.

“Soundwave. You can say anything you need. For one sparkdamned time, be heard, not the one who hears everything.”

Truth be told, with Rodimus’ keen optic to his patterns, muddying the waters was almost an impossible task.

Soundwave was never a coward. The missions didn’t phase him, he had the upper servo by being not only a spy, previously a reporter but also a sparkreader. He wasn’t the one to guess, he was the one to know and use it to his advantage. It just so happened that coming clean about what went on inside his processors filled him with a fear he didn’t know was possible.

“Change is not optimal,” he said as shortly as he could. “Neither to me, nor cassettes. Fear is also not optimal. It overwhelms me when I think of current circumstances. But Galvatron is gone. I’m a different bot than I was with the Decepticons. It should not be in my programming.”

The sound of his vocoder had to be so humiliating, Soundwave couldn’t bear it. If it was Megatron or Galvatron, he couldn’t hear the end of it. Prepared to be called all the different insults on being soft and revealing. He could’ve guessed that, he knew that Megatron’s spark was barely hanging on with or without Optimus. But the pressure he sustained against Decepticons was greater than any of his past sparkbreaks. Soundwave knew this too well. Afterall, he was the model Decepticon, the perfect troop a ruthless leader could’ve asked for.

Rodimus Prime wasn’t a ruthless leader. He was a leader with a spark on his shoulder pad. And he sat next to him, maintaining a comfortable distance. Close enough that Soundwave could feel his natural heat.

When his optics settled back on his frame, he asked, “What scares you the most?”

“Why would this be of use?” Soundwave rebutted, his back suddenly straightening up.

“Ultra Magnus says I talk too much. Kup says it too but he told me to talk too much when things are upsetting. It helps, usually, unless I just startle Perceptor when he wants to ask me something,” he shrugged ever so slightly, yet more understanding than he’d give himself credit for. “Sooo, go on. Maybe it’ll be enough to strike the right cord, mini recorder.”

Though unsure at first, Soundwave knew there was nothing he could lose, as their stares interlocked again. If only Rodimus was aware of it. Knowing him, he could already read him through like a lyric booklet. It was the meaning that kept slipping through both of their servos.

“That the things I grew to feel familiar with were never good for me.”

Nodding, Rodimus signalized him to keep going.

“That I won’t be able to adjust to the new way of life, leaving myself worthless.”

His digits tapped onto the ground.

“That I betrayed my Decepticon roots.”

The silence between sentences continued.

“That I won’t be enough for the cassettes. That they can’t depend on me anymore.”

His spark ached even harder than before. Suddenly, everything seemed beyond his control. And Rodimus still didn’t say a thing.

“That I don’t even hate the version of myself from the present. That I can’t and won’t go back to what was.”

And there was nothing else. All Soundwave could do was to sit down with that realization of what he had confessed to. Even if the Earth didn’t explode and as he observed, neither probably did Cybertron. The cassettes weren’t in any danger nor distress. Everything stayed the same as it was. Maybe in part it was the worst that could’ve happened.

So he remained in his place, not able to look at Rodimus. Those little problems of his weren’t ones to be considered important by a Prime, would they not? Or at least they shouldn’t be. Another wave of shame washed upon Soundwave, just as the waters washed shyly onto the miniscule slab of dirt that connected land and lake. A distance seemingly so little, yet for some could be the longest of stretches. The dandelion pollen danced in the air. It was its time to go too.

Soundwave’s joints moved amply, so he could take cassettes and go. Instead there was not a brush of servos, not even an action to hold him down and beg. There was just Rodimus’ voice, calmer than he had suspected.

“Did it help?”

“No.”

“Ehhh. I knew it wouldn’t,” admitted Rodimus and behind his mask, Soundwave got the biggest reminder of how he was. Surprisingly for him, he wasn’t the reason to go. Despite his terrible jokes and unserious demeanor, he was actually the reason to stay. “But sometimes saying it out at least gives you a road to drive through to solve this out.”

His brow ridges drew in together, “I’m not a vehicle. I can’t drive on the road, Rodimus Prime.”

“We’ll attach mini wheels on you and no one will know,” he waved his servo. Shifting around, he leaned on his leg, as his arm propped him up. “You know what I mean. Maybe it did show you the path to take or at least… Things to look closer to. I shouldn’t be the one to speculate–”

“Speculate,” he ordered so quickly it surprised even himself.

But even more so Rodimus. Blinking twice in a row, he asked, “Are you sure? I shouldn’t go out of my way to question your judgment.”

“Neither should I question yours.”

“If you don’t question what I say then… Truth be told I’ll probably end up doing a lot of stupid scrap. Well, that’s what leadership does to ya. Learnt that the hard way,” ex-venting heavier, Rodimus paused for a mere kilik.

Yet this was enough for Soundwave. Though usually carrying himself with a bravado unlike anyone else, there was something humble about Rodimus Prime. The pushback from himself to be more discreet, the times when he saw him hovering over his plating, as if not to touch him without his permission. Maybe this kindness was its byproduct too. Not even to mention his developed iron will. The whole picture revealed to him someone so much different than he’d expect from the Decepticon rumors regarding Hot Rod. 

Rodimus Prime was stubborn, that was for a fact. Yet it took Soundwave too long to see his stubbornness expand to bettering himself too. For better or for worse.

Barriers be damned, Soundwave couldn’t deny this truth anymore. He cared. At times too much. His servo touched his arm, reassuring Rodimus of his presence. What his touch couldn’t express, Soundwave hoped his optics could follow.

“Speak,” almost as a demand, Soundwave said firmly, lost in the blues of his optics.

And Rodimus didn’t waste any more klik, “Do you miss Galvatron? Or Megatron? Be honest, please.”

The answer was almost too simple for him to say out loud. And even more so, he hated how he didn’t have to think too much about it.

That was why honesty was this important.

“No.”

“You’ve said that it was you and the cassetticons who voted to join us instead of going to jail… Did anyone just refuse? I haven’t heard anything against the Autobots from Rumble or Frenzy.”

“Neither them nor Laserbeak, nor Ravage disagreed. We have all listened to one another,” admitted Soundwave, almost confused. “What is the meaning of those?”

“Don’t worry, Waves, last question,” with a smile at the newfound nickname for him, Rodimus paused for a moment and delivered one more query. “Have you ever wondered… Have you changed at all, Soundwave? Or was it just the place you got to and the bots around you?”

One more time, their stares interlocked with each other. All while the only thing Soundwave could hear was the static.

Instead of a thousand different voices, his processors only echoed the last thing Rodimus had asked. The perspective shift that Soundwave hadn’t expected. His late lunar-cycle wonderings always led him to the same conclusion. That it has already happened. Right before Rodimus, the answer wasn’t as clear cut as he had believed.

Living next to Megatron and Galvatron for millions of vorns did equal to his own circuits being somewhat fried when it came to his own autonomy. There wasn’t a moment in which Soundwave could wonder about who he was. Not when the loyalty to the Decepticon cause had consecrated his better judgment. What he thought wasn’t as important as his allegiance to Megatron’s new idea, repairing what his Amica Starscream wanted to burn away or even more so – perfect. Afterall, being Megatron’s right servo bot was an honorable title.

Everything he had wanted was crushed irrevocably by war. His journalistic skills made way for his spying abilities, his cassettes started recording others not for news but for blackmailing material. One by one, Soundwave had withered away, with the smoke of Megatron’s cannon.

If neither Megatron nor Galvatron were there… What did it make Soundwave to his own core?

It wasn’t as if he was forced to join the Decepticons like many others did. Their Cause was about uniting the Cybertronian world, full of corruption, lies and bribery. Soundwave saw it first servo, interviewing many mighty personas. The decision to join Megatron with his conquest wasn’t too hard to make. What also wasn’t too hard was succumbing to the  descent into violent ways. Soundwave didn’t mind deactivating, destroying and stalking his opponents. If asked, he’d do it all over again. The quick switch only seemed like an excuse rather than a full reason.

On the other side, joining the Autobot ranks and still mastering his spy craft had been the calmest, most fulfilled Soundwave had felt in many vorns. Sure, there were some Autobots who would’ve never accepted Decepticons, as he still endured indiscreet stares from Prowl. At least wih the passing solar-cycles these occurrences were decreasing in numbers. Those like Jazz and Arcee smiled and asked him to join the group. What more could he wish for.

Soundwave didn’t regret his decision. Neither of joining the Decepticons, nor of giving the kindness of the Autobots a chance. Even this trip was his way of embracing it. Both sides almost prioritized his choice to live time and time again. Such complicated matters.

Sensing quietly that Rodimus awaited his answer, Soundwave spoke, “I am unsure. I miss when predicting occurrences was a given fact, not an anomaly.”

Rodimus listened. Maybe for the first time ever, he saw him this focused. However, with this confession, he lifted his helm and asked, “Is it time for me to tell you something?”

“Proceed,” he nodded, tired of speaking this much.

“Thanks. You probably haven’t seen it coming but this is a story about me. Shocking, right?” Letting a small laugh, he probably knew Soundwave rolled his optics. But neither of them commented. “You know this one… One solar-cycle me and Daniel are fishing in this exact spot and the other I receive the Matrix of Leadership from Optimus and everything goes bananas.”

“Bananas?”

“It’s an Earth expression,” Rodimus waved his servo and continued. “Everything happened so fast and I didn’t know what to say or even do. I begged Ultra Magnus to take this thing away from me and that I’m not the one Optimus chose. And then Magnus sat me down and said ‘Optimus might have not chosen you directly but the Matrix of Leadership did. Choose yourself just as the Matrix did.’ Guess I couldn’t stop thinking about it but Ultra Magnus sure knows how to drag me into the zone, heh. And I finally understood.”

Still unable to understand him completely, Soundwave simply stared. Hoping to memorize every detail of his gorgeous faceplate, of the exact blue of his optics. As he had noticed Rodimus’ side stare to check on him, Soundwave nodded. Almost as if in their own secret language.

“I’m nowhere near as good as Optimus was. I thought to be more like him I need to forget about being Hot Rod. But it’s not as easy as it says when solar-cycle after solar-cycle your life changes completely. But I was never known for taking the scenic route, anyway,” Rodimus paused for a klik, letting the memories wash over him. And suddenly, Soundwave felt as if he was right there in the past, by his side. “So I just embraced this. Life is changing and what am I supposed to do other than to just roll with it. Everything is changing and I guess I did too. Maybe not fully Hot Rod but I’ve learnt to like Rodimus Prime just as much. And he didn’t lose Hot Rod either, just… Changed the circumstances and drove farther. To become someone I’ll be proud of in the future. And maybe like this, you’ll find that version of yourself too.”

The gust of wind danced across both of their frames. Such an insignificant thing that Soundwave felt into his own core. It truly was about the little things. Even as he had felt the grass underneath his bunched up servos. Finally green enough.

With his spark still trembling, he couldn’t say the final assessment. Instead, he asked, “What if I fail my cassetticons? What if they don’t like who I will become?”

As thinly veiled two cannon gunshot as he could’ve made it.

An answer came to him immediately, “If they love you, they won’t mind. Yes, I know, you ex-‘Cons and that word but trust me – it’s a good word.”

“All the love songs have got it.”

“See? Some more faith, Soundwave and stay on the right track. Things might change but there’s only one you around. Let him stay in good servos, be it yours or someone else’s too. No need to face it all on your own.”

When the last tones of Rodimus’ vocoder had punctuated his view, finally Soundwave had realized its meaning. As much as this confession once might’ve been an exile warrant from the Decepticons, this time he had to say – Rodimus Prime was right.

The Decepticons had such a warped idea of care and affection to one another, the stagnation was inevitable. Maybe even welcomed. If one didn’t change, they could become the most efficient among them. There was barely anyone to confide in and listen to. Barely anyone cared about one another, when Megatron’s cannon could fire at any given moment.

This time, no matter the wariness and skepticism within him, he trusted what Rodimus had said. Soundwave wasn’t alone. He didn’t have to take it all on himself. Forced to a secluded life, at first it couldn’t have been an answer but… Right then Soundwave could take that chance. To understand and listen to himself. Find other things in life that could bring him the happiness he wasn’t aware of. Maybe even things he could embrace. On the digital roads of the Autobot City, he didn’t have to be alone. Not with friends old and new, his dear cassettes and… Rodimus Prime. Bracing himself for whatever future could bring.

He was still the same Soundwave. He was still as superior as ever.

“Thank you, Rodimus Prime,” he confessed, letting his digits softly brush against the back of Rodimus’ servo. The sudden current he felt coming from his chassis was nothing short of amusing. “Thank you for listening to me.”

“Glad I could help you out,” this time, Rodimus’ smile wasn’t one of his usual and boastful ones. In comparison it was rather modest. Yet it made Soundwave’s spark skip a beat even more so than before. “I know you don’t have wheels but trust me that if needed I’ll give you the best set around.”

“When did you learn to be this patient for the changes?” Asked Soundwave, recounting things from the past.

“Oooh, Soundwave. I’m the worst bot to be called “patient”. It’s a different thing, entirely,” not teasing him anymore, Rodimus immediately cleared the waters. “I’d say it’s more of adaptability. When Springer wanted to try gladiator fights, I started training so she would have a good opponent. When Daniel said he wanted to study history, I learnt some so I could quiz him on it. When Junkions became bigger allies for us, I learnt the TV speak so they wouldn’t feel alone. Kup says it’d be my strongest suit if I worked on it a bit more. Guess that’s the patience I’ve been lacking, heh.”

Once more, Soundwave couldn’t answer instantly. Just nodded along to his explanation.

Before coming to the Autobot cityscape, Soundwave’s vision of Rodimus was askew. Most Decepticons said he was a mere copy of Optimus with none of the bite that the late Autobot leader had. Then he had heard about how Rodimus talks a lot but not necessarily does too much. His brash decisions could doom the Autobots before the Decepticons would have tried.

Then beneath the summer skies, Soundwave learnt the truth. Within Rodimus Prime, there was the same kind of tiredness he saw in Megatron. Yet despite this, he still smiled and joked unapologetically. Leadership didn’t change his spark from being optimistic and immersed in his own infective hopefulness. Instead, it gave those traits a tangible culprit.

Between their stolen glances, Soundwave wanted to try his luck one last time.

“Rodimus Prime,” he said and as Rodimus turned around a hummed, interested, he continued. “Thank you for giving me a chance.”

“Why wouldn’t I? I know some Autobots have a very weird outlook but I couldn’t leave you behind. These changes came fast, sure but nothing I can’t handle. You deserved this and… I was right. You’re smart and collected, you plan and listen better than anyone I know. You’re someone I trust. You’re more than I could’ve imagined,” Rodimus smiled at him once more, scooting a little closer.

Hence Soundwave closed their distance, taking his servo on his own and giving it a squeeze, “A valiant leader. A hothead with a thousand stories to tell and a shining spark. Ditto, Rodimus Prime.”

He could see the heavier ex-vent stuck in his chest. Along with a quiet glance to their intertwined servos. Then Rodimus confessed, “Sometimes I wish I’d known you from before, Soundwave. I’m just not sure if we’d like each other then, y’know. And if we haven’t changed even a little… Maybe we would’ve never found each other.”

This kind of silence wasn’t something voluntarily chosen by Soundwave. It simply hit him like a sudden fire set right where his spark was.

Right there, right in this moment, Soundwave looked at him and a part of him knew. Another change in his life, reaching him without a question or an invitation. Maybe he couldn’t plan a thing like this. And maybe he couldn’t completely name it yet. In spite of that in this exact moment, holding Rodimus’ servo and looking into his gorgeous blue optics, a part of him knew. The swirling storm of flames overwhelmed him, just as Rodimus’ presence did. His radiant soft smile accompanied by the sounds of the lake’s subtle waves forming. His magenta plating reflected in the clear sky’s sunlight.

All Soundwave could think about was how the blue of his optics became his favorite color.

Then suddenly, a splash of the water startled them both. Soundwave jumped away, leaving himself so damn displeased. He knew the culprit. One so embarrassing, he couldn’t look back at Rodimus anyway.

With a sharp turn, he stood up and looked at his little criminals, “Rumble! Frenzy! What is the meaning of this!?”

As predicted by him, in the lake he spotted Rumble and Frenzy (as he looked more menacingly, Ravage quietly dragged herself out of it) with looks that could only translate to being busted. Their visors even rounder, their servos mid-air, awaiting their judgment. While Soundwave very, very slowly approached them.

“Heh, we were… We were just… Uh, Frenz?” Rumble took the stage first, yet with his word stumbles of course he had to lay it on someone else.

“Ughhh, coward,” Frenzy groaned heavily and shook her helm. “Look, it was supposed to be a fishing trip and you guys don’t do anything! Boss, the only fish you almost got just swam away. Sooo me and this idiot right here,” saying so, she pointed her thumb-digit at Rumble. “Decided to catch fish ourselves.”

Rumble nodded, “Yeah. As she said. Hey, idiot!?”

“With your servos?” Asked Soundwave, completely unamused and disregarding their petty insults.

“Eeeh, it’s more fun this way,” he shrugged, to which Frenzy finally agreed.

Feeling every circuit of his barrage especially at his helm, Soundwave was ready to tell them all off. The concrete words waited to slip away from his glossa. Until someone else appeared by his side. Someone brighter than the sun.

“Ohoho, you’re absolutely right, it is! But I know a way even more fun that with servos y’know,” Rodimus chimed in their shared moment.

Confused, Soundwave just shot him a puzzled look. To which Rodimus winked right at him. The way his faceplate felt like it was straight up lit on fire reminded him why he kept it hidden. Among other reasons.

“Oh, yeah?” Frenzy questioned. “Then show us, Autobot no.1.”

Other cassettes agreed. While Soundwave felt like digging his own deactivation spot.

“Soundwave!” Called Rodimus and walked to the side, with him closer than before. Once in a safe distance, he whispered, “I’m gonna do something. Not gonna tell you what, you’ll learn in your time. But you gotta trust me with this, okay?”

Which force commanded him back then, Soundwave couldn’t tell. But he simply said, “Affirmative. I trust you.”

Rodimus gave him a slight pat on his back, “Then watch me transform and do it yourself on my roof.”

It had to be the dumbest idea Soundwave had ever heard. Well, no turning back there.

Stepping away, he gave him all the field to transform into his impressive alt mode. Possibly Rodimus didn’t call for his trailer but even without it, the sight was so damn remarkable. His sleek mode with sharp edges, the fastest sports car there could be. His spoiler at the end, his flames forming into one, his exhaust pipes ready for action. Even just watching him transform was… So enticing.

Not to think about this too much, Soundwave followed his suit. As he transformed into his cassette recorder mode, he placed himself right where Rodimus wanted. The shifting weight had to be all he needed, as his engine roared in Soundwave’s hidden audials. The next thing he knew, Rodimus drove a little further away to then launch them both helm first into the water.

Except they didn’t. Instead of sinking into the bottom, Rodimus’ alt mode sliced the waves as they were. His wheels traveled across the bottom and lake waters cleared out onto the sides, creating a path for them. Before Soundwave the water splashed into the sun creating the myriads of shining rainbows in contact with the light. The nautical life appeared as if within the servos’ reach. And the sound of Rodimus’ laughter, as well as his roaring engine carried through the whole journey of theirs.

Finally, the ramp of the lake was big enough for Rodimus to speed through it. In a moment, his velocity got higher than Soundwave could have expected. When Rodimus’ wheels stopped touching the ground, he saw him transform midair. Who could he be not to do just the same?

It was a split-klik. A mere moment between them. When Rodimus was so close, Soundwave felt like he could take him into his arms. The droplets of water both clinged onto their chassis and flew everywhere the air led them. Soundwave’s servo brushed across his chest, while Rodimus’ grip shifted to his sides. The smile on his faceplate was brighter than anything Soundwave had ever seen. His optics were bluer than the sky. Everything smelled like fresh water.

Next thing Soundwave knew, they hit the meadow next to the lake. His back pressed against the soft grass, while Rodimus laid on top of him. As he laughed so gleefully, Soundwave felt the energon rush in his lines. Several ex-vents were all Rodimus took to compose himself and look back at him again. The distance between them waited patiently to be shattered.

When Soundwave’s life stayed in its spot, only then he could see how Rodimus Prime was always in motion. As if nothing could remain as it was for longer than a servoful of cycles. Whether it’d be his sudden Primehood, the change within his closest bots, the way Daniel went away for his own sake, it could never be too familiar for too long. Yet within him, Soundwave saw the truth. It was hard to get used to anything when life never gave him a chance.

For Rodimus Prime nothing was permanent. For Soundwave everything was bound to be forever.

Reaching out with his servo, Soundwave brushed his digits against his faceplate. A sudden touch made Rodimus startle at first. Then quickly he moved to await the next part. As Soundwave wanted nothing else than to give him that piece of eternity.

“Rodimus Prime. If you want to teach me the change – then let me be the one constant in your life.”

Something shifted in his optics. Something making the blue even clearer.

“Soundwave…”

“Holy scrap, Rods, that was so cool! Look, it even rained some of these fishes,” Rumble cut through the moment when least expected. As he always did.

This one sentence, just this one thing was enough for Soundwave’s whole self to detach from reality in the mere kiliks. With Rodimus on top of him, feeling his warmth so close to his spark. There was no way he was able to move. In the spark bond he shared with the cassettes he could feel that damn smugness he wanted to avoid.

As well as… Pride? Happiness? What was going on?

The weight of Rodimus’ chassis shifted, when he looked back at cassettes, “Rods? That’s a new one alright. I like it.”

“Well, Rods , if you have more tricks then go ahead and show us! Unless you wanna go to your fishing rod in the mud,” laughed Frenzy, joining along and wielding one of the fishes the tricks provided them with.

“I… Uh…”

“Come on , show us whatcha got!” Rumble encouraged him. “If you wanna prove you’re not lame like some say…”

“Pfft, don’t take anything Springer says as truth, she likes lying.”

“Hmm… I dunno. If you don’t show us, we just might believe her over you…”

Half-sitting and watching it all unfold, Soundwave took special notice of Ravage approaching Rodimus. Her low mews and purring noises were only matched with how she fawned around his leg. Possibly or completely desperate for the pets. Not that it was anything out of the ordinary, yet… Ravage never demanded so from anyone but Soundwave. Seeing how calm she was when Rodimus reached out and scratched her back made his own spark sing once more.

“Alright, alright, alright,” reassured Rodimus, laughing along with it. “Bring it on, guys! Wait for me at the other end!”

To which smiles appeared on their faceplates, as they happily ran forward. Questions piled up in Soundwave’s processors, trying to comprehend it all. When he saw Rodimus’ servo exchanged to him, waiting for him to take it and stand up. And so he did.

With one more look at him, Rodimus Prime took his kilik, bracing himself up. “I would be honored. Soundwave.” Which he sealed it with a kiss on the side of Soundwave’s mask.

Nothing else said. Instead, Rodimus ran away to his cassettes, all already waiting for him.

His processors couldn’t comprehend it anymore. Some soothing melody played across it, as the mark of the kiss buzzed with fire. The most pleasant one in his lifetime. Sensing his spark, Soundwave could feel the increasing happiness coming off from their bond and… Relief. The promise that it was all gonna be right. Just like so, Laserbeak also landed on his shoulder, watching it all go by.

Another gust of the wind ruffled his plating and a strange object flew at him. All confused, Soundwave checked himself to see the intruder.

Then he found it. In his servos was a single leaf of oranges and yellows. Underneath his battle mask, Soundwave smiled.