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they've given me brain worms
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I saw some people asking why Grace had such a well-laid plan for Max within literally a day of deciding he's her worst enemy and I would love to invite you all to sit with me and imagine Grace Chastity laying on top of her perfectly pressed sheets and immaculate bed in full school clothes, entirely still like a fucking vampire in a coffin, spending 10 straight hours doing nothing but planning the downfall of Maxwell Jägerman, one lethal and one non-lethal
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James and Erin (aka my emotional support Irish/English peace metaphor) probably at some point had some major crush milestone moments offscreen, so I’m counting this as canon content you can’t stop me.
Next step after handholding (which she has mastered for the record) is working up the nerve to go for a cheek kiss, Erin has been planning this in her head for a while so she has. James meanwhile is just very happy to be here.
Bonus, the flat color version (I couldn’t decide which to post):
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Derry Girls in LOTR:
Orla: Wizard that shouldn’t have been a wizard but somehow is. Somehow gives even less helpful advice than Gandalf, and is twice as weird as Radagast. Radagast is her best friend, but Saruman is her favorite for some strange Orla-reason and she keeps stalking and startling him while he goes about his evil ways. When she gets bored of his tower, she goes on decade-long trips around Middle Earth. She is always amazed by Gandalf’s fireworks but can never replicate them without burning everyone and everything.
Michelle: Is OBVIOUSLY a dwarf! Specifically a Blacklock dwarf, with thick, billowing black hair and an equally thick and unkempt black beard. She is always talking about clubbing the heads off orcs despite having zero battle experience and threatens everyone as a formal greeting. She thinks all elves are racist, and all races that aren’t dwarves are inferior. Despite being very proud of her heritage, she is always getting names, details and dates mixed up to a comical degree. If anyone outside her line criticizes her facts, she verbally abuses them and their entire family. She describes Thorin Oakenshield as a “massive ride.”
Erin: An elf living in Rivendell that believes she’s super sophisticated, cultured and educated, but she’s really just fucking stupid. She says the most delusional things like “I think Elrond wants Legolas as a match for me” to her fellow elves and they feel both like they want to kill themselves and everything is funny when they’re around her. She makes them tired, but she also makes them laugh. They talk shit about her shitty art that isn’t getting better with years of practice for some confounded reason (although she writes good poetry, it’s just that she can’t recite it very well), but they will defend her honor and her life if threatened in a heartbeat because they love her as she loves them.
Clare: A hobbit. She’s a chubby, big-and-hairy-footed girl with the pinkest, roundest cheeks and the sunniest hair. Everyone in The Shire is in love with her idc. She’s of Took descent, and while very chipper and pretty, can also put you in your place so that you never imagine crawling out. People keep asking her when she’s going to accept any of the many proposals that are being dropped into her hobbit hole, but she can’t say that she spends her evenings eating cheese and improving prose and grammar of the letters so they sound more romantic. She dreams of adventure, but doesn’t think she has the guts for it. Until a wizard called Orla breaks into her home….
James: Smeegol.
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Derry Girls + dril tweets
[Image descriptions Orla McCool wearing military fatigues with Tweet "if your grave doesnt say "rest in peace" on it you are automatically drafted into the skeleton war" second is Erin Quinn in front of a chalkboard with tweet "im a journalist now so send me any scoops you might hiave and ill try to post it here if its not perverted" Third is Michelle Mallon with her hands on her hips and biting her lower lip with tweet "(me after seeing two guys in any context whatsoever) Well well well if it isnt the Blowjob Brothers" fourth is Gerry Quinn with tweet "and another thing: im not mad. please dont put in the newspaper that i got mad." fifth is Clare Devlin looking distressed with tweet "I;ve looked at the facts. Hell im looking at the facts right now." sixth is James Maguire talking to the girls with tweet "(saying to group. of 7 girls) the lore surrounding the Addams family is actually quite a bit darker than you might think..and fairly Leftist" Seventh is Sister Michael looking disgusted with tweet "its decided. tomorrow morning im going to speak with the priest after his sermon and ask him to perform the ritual that will turn me athist." eighth is Grandpa Joe, probably yelling at Gerry, with tweet "IF THE ZOO BANS ME FOR HOLLERING AT THE ANIMALS I WILL FACE GOD AND WALK BACKWARDS INTO HELL"]
