Every time you forgive him

My mother once told me: “Every time you forgive him, he will love you a little more, but you will stop loving him, so the day he loves you the most you will not feel anything for him anymore.”

I apologize. For not putting you first. For putting them first. For making your worth dependent on how they saw you. For making their words more important than yours. For not allowing myself to forgive you or to forgive me. Forgive me. For believing them when they said that something was wrong with you. Forgive me for not believing in you. Forgive me for loving them more than loving you. Forgive me for not loving you. My heart cries every time I read this.