Writing with Anxiety
I often struggle with anxiety around writing. For some reason I would see writing as being dangerous. Whether it was because it was something that made me vulnerable, or because I didn’t believe I was up to the challenge, I had difficulties sitting down to write. Your reasons may be different than mine, but for some reason if you are having anxiety writing, maybe I can help you out a little.
For me, the main thing that really helped me was forming a routine around writing. I kept getting enamored by all those videos of people trying out different writing routines, but as a chaotic gremlin I struggled to form a routine. But in the end I managed something simple, and that is writing at the same time everyday. For me, I need to write first thing in the morning. I wake up, have breakfast, take medicine, journal, and then I write. The rest of the day can be anything else, I can lose my mind doing whatever I want, but the beginning of the day became the same. Since it became a habit the anxiety naturally reduced. But I think that came down to another thing:
I found that if I had written the day before I would feel much more up to wriitng. If I kept up a streak my anxiety would be reduced. Maybe it was because I had it in my mind that I was capable of writing. I had done it before, so I knew I could do it again. It was like it was already loaded in my brain, meaning it was an ability readily available to me.
But building a habit is hard, and if you run out of momentum how do you get over that initial leap? Well, personally I think it is important to take things slow. It’s similar to my mentality when it comes to overcoming depression. Even a single word is an accomplishment. Get a word onto the page, maybe a sentence. Be proud of yourself. I would start with a low word count goal. For me I would try to hit just two-hundred and fifty words. Sometimes I would get into the flow and I would write much more than my goal, sometimes I wouldn’t. Both were okay, the important part was that I sat down and fought my anxiety.
But forgiveness is also important. If your anxiety is too bad and you really can’t write that day it’s okay. It really is. You don’t need to write everyday and putting pressure on yourself will only hurt you in the end. It’s nice to have a low word count goal, a routine, and momentum, but sometimes you just aren’t up to it. It’s okay to have a bad day.
One other thing that can help with writing is tying it to some sort of treat. When I was starting to build my habit I gave myself small rewards for hitting my goals. For example, I’m kind of obsessed with the nerd gummies candy. Everytime I hit my goal I would get to eat a single nerd gummy. If I hit five-hundred I got to eat another one. If I really went crazy and wrote a thousand words I would get to eat two nerd candies. The positive reinforcement really helped me beat my anxiety.
Another fun thing I added on to my routine is a website called 4thewords (I promise I’m not sponsored). It’s an rpg where you fight monsters by writing. The monsters are super cute and the plot is fun. It just adds a little extra dopamine when you see your word count go up and you defeat a monster. I like video games so it really just adds another element of enjoyment to my writing process. You can get a free account and have a good time. It’s super easy and I definitely recommend it.
At the end of the day the paramount thing is to be kind to yourself. All of these things are great but white knuckling your way through something you supposedly enjoy isn’t always the best. Learning why you feel anxiety around it, being mindful, and kind to yourself will do you the best in the long run.
Anxiety sucks but it is something you can learn to manage. These are my tips to cope with your anxiety and get your writing done. Building a routine, momentum, low pressure goals, and rewards is what helped me make writing something enjoyable and not frightening. I truly wish you luck on your journey because writing is supposed to be fun, and if you sought this out I’m sure you do like writing. I’m sure you love writing but your anxiety is simply getting in the way of things. I believe in you and hope this has helped. Happy writing.
