feel like I know you...

@booksandpaperss / booksandpaperss.tumblr.com

but we never met call me elli or books | they/them| multifandom | lots of bsd
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till death, I'll give you my breath - Chapter 1 - booksandpaperss - 文豪ストレイドッグス | Bungou Stray Dogs [Archive of Our Own]
An Archive of Our Own, a project of the Organization for Transformative Works
archiveofourown.org
“Here’s what’s gonna happen,” Chuuya starts, conviction (and probably some desperation) firm in his voice. “Neither of us are gonna leave this damn room. Call in sick, or whatever the fuck I don’t care, but you’re not going into work, or anywhere today. I’ll fucking hold you down just like this if I have to. Got it?” Dazai cocks his head, and Chuuya can tell he’s really trying hard to maintain the bored look on his face. Chuuya’s known Dazai long enough to recognize when he’s curious. “Am I being held hostage by the mafia right now? Is that what’s happening?”

The one where Dazai succeeds in the death he’s always longed for, and Chuuya and Atsushi will do whatever it takes to save the man who saved them before they even realized they were being saved. However many times it takes.

A study in loving someone who refuses to be loved.

Or, soukoku and atsushi timeloop: the fic

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Chapter 4 of this is up!!

Dazai’s ridiculously long legs are crossed, and their chained hands rest on his raised knee. He’s been drilling holes into Mori’s skull with a bullshit eery smile pasted on while Mori gazes serenely out at the view since they sat down. Kouyou’s been glaring skeptically at their joint cuffs.  This was such a bad fucking idea. 

In which Dazai must revisit an unpleasant piece of his past.

#elli's writing#bsd#soukoku#skk fanfic
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chapters 63, 78, 105 and 121.

and each time, Atsushi's reaction was to acknowledge Dazai's presence and be motivated by it:

but, now that the veil has been lifted, it's very easy to see that this Dazai hasn't been very nice in his approach at all. Here, let me help you visualise it a little:

Looking back, that Dazai's words were systematically accusatory and harsh, and if at the start his face resembled the man Atsushi knows, recently his expressions have turned dull and cold, much more reminiscent of what we've seen from the orphanage headmaster.

Yes, the headmaster was cruel. Yes, it was unfair. No, Atsushi didn't deserve any of it. He should have been protected, he has every right to despise that man and to feel all the conflicting feelings he has about it. But it happened. It happened, and he was shaped by it, and every step he takes as he makes his way through his new life has the echoes of the way that man raised him. He's making the choice not to let anyone go through what he has to if he can help it, but also makes him prone to self-sacrifice because of his lack of self-esteem.

Atsushi's been struggling hard since the Decay of Angels arc began, and the voice that's been motivating him whenever his determination waned has been the one of the man who raised and abused him hidden behind the mask of the one who brought him to his new home. It's fucked, and it worked.

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and now starts the countdown of me being deeply obsessed w renga again for a full 24 hours as is tradition anytime i watch or read any content of them ever

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You don’t understand how much the casual intimacy of this means to me. Reki resting his head on top of Langa’s and Langa just looking like he’s never been more in love with anything in his whole life? The comfort and security Reki feels to basically just melt onto Langa’s back, to put his full weight into Langa and just lean comfortably on him while they bicker? It’s genuinely such a pure expression of affection and comfort and more than literally anything else in the ova, this is what makes me the happiest.

#hejrhehdjsw
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