ALTERING THE OUTCOME: BIO CARDS, ACHIEVEMENTS, ETC.

COLLECTED BIO CARDS:

🔺 Alterrune (TOPPAT) - One of the first recruits Henry and Ellie grabbed due to his combat prowess. His real name is Kyle "Alterrune" Cross, but he hasn't revealed that to anyone else in the clan (other than his fellow higher-ups), and he doesn't intend on telling them anytime soon. The clan knows that he's still a force to be reckoned with, though.

💜 Violet Cilantro Wolfsbane (SOLO/TOPPAT) - A former member of the CCC, and a cousin of Alter. Wields a heavy-duty lead sword aptly named "Leadhead" that can cut through any material, and it also has electrical-based powers that allow her sword to absorb any electrical energy and empower her abilities even further...but she tends to hide these abilities from anyone who hasn't earned her trust yet.

🔵 Henry Banker Stickmin (TOPPAT) - The current leader of the Toppat Clan. He's already completed his own mission, thank you very much, but he's still more than willing to help Alter complete his mission.

💕 Ellie Thorne Rose (TOPPAT) - Henry's Right Hand Lady. She's been married to Henry for about a year since the station launched, and although she hasn't been fighting alonside Henry like she used to since then, she still knows how to whack someone hard with a road sign.

✍🏼 IRL!Alterrune (N/A) - Kyle Micheal Ryan Gibbons, the Canadian-born creator of both the Altering the Outcome askblog and its' story, has finally joined the game himself! He has no ties to any of the major factions, as he is normally behind the computer monitor, not on it. He's still a force to be reckoned with, though, no matter which side of the monitor he's on.

🎩 Reginald Copperbottom (TOPPAT) - The previous leader of the Toppats. He once considered betraying Henry, but after Henry put himself on the line to save the Toppat Clan, he now knows the clan is in good hands with him.

🛠 Right Hand Man Reborn (TOPPAT) - After getting beat up by Henry in the Airship, he gained some new enhancements, and powerful ones at that. He's helped Reginald and Alter make some quick escapes.

🐁 Carol Crystal Cross (TOPPAT) - Alterrune's fashionable green and black-clad mother. She's one woman that you don't wanna cross, which many of the Toppats have learnt the hard way. She also has her own personal army of white mice at her disposal, which have proven to be advantageous to both her and her fellow clan members.

🛡 Clarence Cross (TOPPAT) - Alter's deceased father. He was captured by the Wall and killed by Dmitri when Alter was a kid, but has now, after 13 years, come back to the family as a ghost. When he was still alive, he was a loving and caring father to Alter, and he always had a genuine smile on his face, taking care of Alter whenever Carol couldn't. Now a ghost, he's back to doing all those things, now with ghostly abilites atop that.

🥼 Dr. Vinschpinsilstien (TOPPAT) - After losing her boat to the government, Henry and Ellie offered her a job as the Toppat's lead medic, which she gladly took. She knows how to quickly and thouroughly treat every wound the Toppats may come across. Most of the Toppats call her "Dr. V", as her full last name is incredibly hard to pronounce and spell.

🚁 Charles Chandler Calvin (GOV'T) - The government's top pilot, and one of Galeforce's best recruits. He has a bit of a personal vendetta against the Toppats for taking Henry, and can be a bit hyperactive at times, but he can still hold his own in a fight.

🏅General Galeforce (GOV'T) - Even though the Toppat raid backfired hilariously, his discovery of the Alter Rune didn't, which led to a massive promotion. He's a gentle giant, but mess with him and you'll be scrubbing his entire quarters with only a toothbrush.

🎖 Commander Galeforce (GOV'T) - After the Alter Rune raid backfired, he was discharged honorably from the army. One of his higher-ups managed to land him a spot as one of the head commanders of the FBI, and now is known as Commander Galeforce. He doesn't mind still being called General, though.

❄️ Dmitri Johannes Petrov (WALL) - Henry ruined his reputation and caused him to take a stop sign to the face, causing him to talk with a lisp now. He'll take out anybody who tries to get in the way of him killing Henry, and without any hesitation.

🌨 Dmitri Johannes Petrov Reborn (WALL) - After being shot back in the temple, the Wall staff was able to revive him and give him some cybernetic upgrades similar to RHM's. He now has a personal vendetta against both Henry and Alter.

💪🏼 Grigori Olyat (WALL) - His arms were in casts for weeks after he got hit by one of The Wall's own trucks, but he eventually healed up, despite how slow that process was. He and Dmitri have planned to kill Stickmin for a very long time...

🦾 Grigori Olyat Reborn (WALL) - Even though he took a more fatal bullet than Dmitri did back in the temple, Dmitri was able to revive his most trusted aide, at the cost of Grigori's head being the only non-robotic part of his body left. Now with a robotic body with a ton of functions, he's just as dangerous as Dmitri is.

🪃 Samuel Mundy (SOLO) - He's been contracted for the police and government before, but has been off-duty ever since the Toppats went into orbit. That doesn't mean he's no longer using his Sniper Rifle, though, he's still got a few headshots left in him.

⛓ Dave Panpa (TOPPAT) - He was locked in the Toppat's brig for two years until he decided to join the Toppat Clan to free himself. He's never been more proud of that choice.

🔫 Rupert Price (TOPPAT) - After being reunited with his old partner, Dave, he officially quit the government and joined him in the Toppat Clan. He's never actually liked the government, to be honest.

💟 Jacob Wolfsbane (SOLO) - Violet's incredibly shy brother. While he's grown as a person with the help of his older sister, he still has his moments of cowardice. Violet and the rest of the team always help him overcome those obstacles, though.

🦼 Drake Wolfsbane (SOLO) - Violet's father. He's been wheelchair-bound for his entire life, having no feeling in his legs at all. That didn't stop him from becoming a botanist and teaching a young Violet all his tips and tricks.

🌂 Clair Cross (SOLO) - Carol's sister, and Violet's mother. Personality-wise, she's the opposite of Carol. She's a very gentle woman, and only goes on the offense to protect her family.

🔷 Nicholas Cross (TOPPAT) - Alterrune's navy blue-clad older brother, codename "Zinger". He's a gentle giant, but mess with him or his brothers and you'll wish you were never born.

🟡 Justin Cross (TOPPAT) - Alterrune's mustard yellow-clad younger brother, codename "Atlas". He's quite hyper for being a year younger than Alter is, and tends to be unpredictable (which works in his favor during battles with the Toppat clan)!

💞 Jacob Rose (TOPPAT) - Ellie's brother, whom unfortunately lost his life from one of the enemy factions planting a bomb near him. Despite resurfacing as a ghost, he's still got his snarky yet sincere personality he had when he was alive.

😈 Terence Suave (TOPPAT) - The Toppat Clan's leader before Reginald came in. He is hated across the board, he always did things for his own selfish gain, never listening to anyone in the Clan who objected to him.

🚜 Texas Jack (SOLO) - The Texan owner and bartender of the tavern just down the road from the Wall. His real name is Jackson Cooper, and he considers trading the heat of Texas for the Russian blizzards to be the best decision he ever made for his buisiness, as he and his tavern are more popular here than they ever were back home.

💉 Corporal Earl Grey (GEOGRAM) - The head soldier of the GEOGRAM army, and the overseer of all the tests that GEOGRAM runs on the ColorStreak Battalion's beast forms. He always carries a thermos of chilled earl grey tea on him to stay hydrated.

🔥 Laurence Blazerflame Burnway (GEOGRAM) - A man who has suffered a lot, but he has finally turned his life around (with help from Kyle, of course) and finally feels at home.

🎀 Kynn Libitina Lee/Lily Ribbonrunner Burnway (GEOGRAM) - The younger sister of Laurence Burnway and daughter of Aaron Schaffer, Lily died after being accidentally shot by Laurence, but through Hack!Anon's help, Lily was brought back as Kynn Lee. Now Laurence, Lily, and Aaron are finally back together again as a family, and Lily is the head ass-kicker of it.

🧀 Fredrick Muenster (TOPPAT) - The only Toppat who has a top hat made of edible material. He does enjoy having a snack available on his head at any time, but lately, he's been having trouble keeping his cheesy hats fresh.

👩🏻‍🎤 Matilda Ivy (TOPPAT) - An irish Toppat member with a crazy pink hairdo that everyone agrees is the best out of the whole clan. She's been known to get drunk off of Irish whiskey, which normally leads to someone getting stabbed with a broken bottle.

🧹 The Witch (TOPPAT) - The Toppat's original herbalist, and currently learning new ways to use herbal materials from Violet Wolfsbane. She's one of the only members of the clan who wears a hat other than the standard top hat.

💎 Gene Fredrickson (TOPPAT) - Originally a mayoral figure, he was found to have committed voter fraud shortly after Henry stole the Tunisian Diamond. He's had to grow accustomed to working with Henry, though it's still awkward for both parties.

🚂 Mr. MacBeth (TOPPAT) - The man in charge of the Toppat Clan's cargo train operations. He loves his job, and hates being seperated from being on the rails. He's gotten used to being compared to an ape since the station launched.

💸 Stu Pendles (TOPPAT) - An unfortunate higher-up who still hasn't paid a debt he owes Carol Cross yet. It's not like he isn't trying, he simply doesn't have an easy way of getting the money!

🛰 Burt Curtis (TOPPAT) - The Toppat Clan Orbital Station's overseer. He always wears a pair of orange headphones with his top hat for easy message relaying. He's not the biggest fan of his job (it can get pretty monotonous at times), but the Toppat Clan pays nice, so he doesn't mind doing it.

COLLECTED ACHIEVEMENTS:

Stock achievement set:

Not Failing This Time! - Get through one of the AtO pathways without failing. Only counts on your very first attempt, so make sure you choose wisely!

Dreamed By Bone - Looks like bonedbybone's dream came true...though I have no idea how many times I've ACTUALLY answered him, to be honest, so let's just say that it was 10 like his dream said.

Double Duelist - Win the friendly 2v2 duel with the Phantom Squad.

Rank: Wallbreaker (WB) - Get the true ending for Chapter 1 - "The New Protaganist(s)".

Rank: Quintuple Threat (QT) - Get the true ending for Chapter 2 - "The First Fight(s)".

Rank: Unstoppable (U) - Get the true ending for Chapter 3 - "The Breaking Point(s)".

The Right Move - You made the right move with Alter...but at what cost...?

No Way Back - Witness Lily Burnway's death.

A Strange Reunion - Learn who Kynn truly is and the person she once was.

True Happiness - Reunite Laurence with his sister, Lily.

Forgiveness - Successfully find peace in Laurence.

Alter's Dalmatian - Meet Alter's pet Dalmatian dog, Damien!

Thunderstruck - Meet Violet's pet stormcloud, Thunder!

Fate - Destroy the remains of the Heaven Incursion.

Anarchistic ColorStreak Rainbow - Have the AtO team join in on the Grand Festival festivities!

Blackjacks Redeemed - Hear out the stories of the Ex-Blackjack Members.

Blackjacks Assemble - Witness the Ex-Blackjack Members turn themselves into superheroes.

White Diamond - Get the CSB to earn the highest and most prestigious medal of honor that GEOGRAM can bestow upon them: the White Diamond.

"Beastly Beauty" achievement set:

Beastly Rage - Complete Alter's monster test

Beastly Fear - Complete Violet's monster test

Beastly Pain - Complete Henry's monster test

Beastly Sorrow - Complete Ellie's monster test

Beastly Sickness - Complete Kyle's monster test

The Perfect Lab Rat Group - Get 100% completion on all 5 monster tests

"Party Animal" achievement set:

Party of Rage - Complete Alter's party test

Party of Fear - Complete Violet's party test

Party of Pain - Complete Henry's party test

Party of Sorrow - Complete Ellie's party test

Party of Sickness - Complete Kyle's party test

The Life of the Party - Get 100% completion on all 5 party tests

"Faded Color Gang" Achievement Set:

Killer Knox - Turn Kyle (TK!Alter) into Knox.

Violent Victoria - Turn Violet into Victoria.

Harming Harold - Turn Henry into Harold.

Evil Emma - Turn Ellie into Emma.

Klever Kelvin - Turn Kyle (IRL!Alter) into Kelvin.

Two Sides, One Coin - Turn all characters evil (IRL!Alter isn't required for this achievement).

BONUS MESSAGE: I hope you won't be needing your little quartet anytime soon, IRL!Alter, because I have plans for them. -Adam

"Thicker Than Water" Achievement Set:

Cousins Forever - Succeesfully have Alter calm down Violet.

Brothers For Never - Sucessfully get Kyle's brothers to retreat.

All In The Family - Learn about Justin and Nicholas’ recruitment into The Trinity of Fate.

The Son - Listen to Aaron’s confession with Laurence.

Never Alone - Show Laurence that he isn't alone on his endeavours.

"The New Enemies" Achievement Set:

The Old Soldier - Gain info on William Arase and his group.

Not One Of Us - Gain info on Sarah Kelso and her group.

Phasmophobia - Gain info on Phantom 1 and his group.

Pulled To Darkness - Gain info on Laurence Burnway and his group.

A Dreamer's Space - Gain info on Albert and his group.

The Enemy Within - Gain info on Terence Suave and his group.

For Your Sake - Gain info on Justin & Nicholas and their group.

"Operation: Prowling Spider" Achievement Set:

Should've Gone For Silver - Successfully complete Part 1 of Operation: Prowling Spider and give Laurence Burnway a taste of his own medicine.

Data Unavailable - Successfully complete Part 2 of Operation: Prowling Spider and syphon the data back from Laurence's servers.

A Pheonix's Birdcage - Sucessfully complete the final part of Operation: Prowling Spider and finally put a stop to Laurence Burnway's plans.

Zulu Security Gone - 100% complete all parts of Operation: Prowling Spider and weaken the Trinity Of Fate.

"Operation: Hounds Slumber" Achievement Set:

House Of Blackjack Cards - Successfully complete Part 1 of Operation: Hounds Slumber and weaken Kyle's brothers' forces for the first time.

One Pair - Successfully complete Part 2 of Operation: Hounds Slumber and find out just how skilled Violet can be with a sniper rifle.

Two Pair - Successfully complete Part 3 of Operation: Hounds Slumber and detoxify the toxin with a recipe from Laurence Burnway.

Three of a Kind - Successfully complete Part 4 of Operation: Hounds Slumber and destroy the Blackjacks' drill machine.

Royal Flush - Successfully complete Part 5 of Operation: Hounds Slumber and sic a trained dog on the Blackjacks.

Full House - Successfuly complete the final part of Operation: Hounds Slumber and save Nick and Justin from having to take any more of Arase's fury.

"Operation: Twilight Gate" Achievement Set:

Edge of My Mind - Complete the prelude to the Operation and have Adam Schaffer give William Arase a literal taste of napalm.

Monochromatic Victory - Complete Section 1 of the Operation and begin the push towards Albert.

Double Freeze - Complete Section 2 of the Operation and show Albert that cold temperatures and two-on-one battles won't slow you down at all.

Tripled Trouble - Complete Section 3 of the Operation and show that even when three things go wrong at once, you can still handle all of them.

Quadruple Quarrel - Complete the final section of the Operation and finally show Albert he doesn't know everything about the team.

"Operation: Emperor's Abyss" Achievement Set:

Sewage Blast - Complete the first part of the Operation and prove that not even raw sewage will stop you from reaching your goal.

Beach Party - Complete the second part of the Operation and enjoy some well-deserved fun in the sun.

Rage Of The Colorblind - Complete the third part of the Operation and find out the truth about Alter's past.

A New Outpost - Complete the fourth part of the Operation and give Violet a new base for the Chaos Creation Center.

A Cup Of Earl Gray - Complete the fifth part of the Operation and have Earl take Jerry away from Terence...with a profound effect on the latter.

End Of Suave - Complete the final part of the Operation and get rid of Terence Suave once and for all.

"Operation Cat's Claw" Achievement Set:

Catnipped - Complete the first part of the Operation and show Kelso why nature really matters...and humiliate a grunt by making him hallucinate in the process.

Electric Kitty, Eclectic Kitty - Complete the second part of the Operation and display to Kelso why using electric based-weapons was a really bad idea.

Exploding Kittens - Complete the third part of the Operation and turn one of Kelso's syndicates into bloody chunks of meat with a mounted high-speed high-ordinance grenade machine gun turret.

Giving A Cat Cow's Milk - Complete the fourth part of the Operation and cause the assassins in both the Airship and the GEOGRAM base to get killed by their own sabatoges...and earn the CSB a medal of honor in the process!

Cat Medicine - Complete the fifth part of the Operation with help from a familiar face and set the stage for the final act like a Phantom Aficionado.

Declawed - Complete the final part of the Operation and take down Kelso once and for all...and have three other characters deservingly earn the same medal of honor the CSB did!

"Anniversary Events" Achievement Set:

One Year Older - 100% complete the scavenger hunt for the Altering The Outcome 1st Anniversary Event.

Two Years Older - Enjoy some time off for the Altering The Outcome 2nd Anniversary Event.

CHARACTERS AVAILABLE FOR ASKS:

💜 Violet Wolfsbane

🔵 Henry Stickmin

💕 Ellie Rose

✍🏼 Kyle Gibbons

🎩 Reginald Copperbottom

🛠 Right Hand Man (RHM)

💟 Jacob Wolfsbane

💞 Jacob Rose

🥼 Dr. Vinschpinsilstien (Dr. V)

🚁 Charles Calvin

ALTERNATE STORY CHARACTERS (CURRENTLY UNAVAILABLE):

[FANFIC: One Single Blow - a short Animator vs Animation fanfic featuring The Second Coming and Blue that shows how things could've gone differently for Blue during Animation vs. Addiction]

INTERMISSION 9: THE STORMCLOUD (ft. @violetthunderstorm!)

[NOTE: This takes place just before the final part of Cat's Claw.]

(KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK)

(A purple blur dashes to the hatch on top of the airship and lets someone in...and that blur is Violet, of course.)

Guess that answers my question...god, why is someone here at 6 in the goddamn morning?

(We all groggily follow the ever-so-energetic Violet to the airship hatch, and the vistor we let in is...well...)

(...like nobody we've ever seen before.)

(The 5 of us are greeted by a little purple stick-figure.)

(She wears a purple stereotypical witch hat with a gold band around it that seems to have been made to look jagged [akin to a lightning bolt], a lavender tasseled scarf on her neck, a pinkish purple long-sleeved shirt with a purple storm cloud printed onto it, and a purple skirt to finish the look off.)

I'm sorry, WHAT?! A pet stormcloud?

(She brings out a little ball made of storm clouds. Suddenly, a face made of purple lightning appears.)

(The little purple stick figure then poofs away in a puff of smoke.)

I think I'll call him...Thunder.

(Thunder immediately begins chasing Damien, Alter's pet dalmatian dog, and the two immediately begin a Scooby-Doo-esque chase.)

Sweet. Thanks for the info, Doc.

You're welcome, Kyle. By the way, how is Clifton Hill?

Oh, it is fucking SWEET. Since I made this game world, I made Clifton Hill exactly as I remembered it back when I visited it in real life, back around...2012-ish, I think? As such, we just got done visiting the Ripley's Believe it or Not mueseum, and are headed to the Guiness World Records museum right now.

(Alter vomits into a nearby trash can.)

For authenticity, Alter! You know I don't half-ass things!

Alter, c'mon, it wasn't that bad. And you know that Kyle warned you about eating the snacks we got at the gift shop before entering.

(Alter runs over to the trash can again and vomits into it.)

I promise, Alter.

Dr. V, if you ever need to contact us again, just give us another video call, okay?

Да. thank you, Kyle.

...I just said "yes" in Russian, didn't I?

You did. And I don't mind it. Now then, gotta go, doc. See ya!

(I disconnect the call with Dr. V from my wheelchair control panel as we head into the Guiness World Records museum, with the last of Alter's dizziness finally wearing off.)

Maera...? Is that you...?

(Dr. Free's voice is heard from atop a pile of scrapwood. His neck is bent out of shape, but not broken.)

Please...get us to a hospital...!

(Dr. Sander's voice is is then heard from where the fluourescent light was broken over her head. She was stabbed by a shard of glass from the fluourescent light in the jaw, leaving a hole in her jaw that thankfully didn't kill her.)

(She teleports the doctors to the medbay in the GEOGRAM base, then calls up Sutton.)

(Sutton teleports down to Maera's location, and is immediately gobsmacked to see something he absolutely did not want to see.)

(Laurence whips out a machete and "slices" it through Sutton and Maera's necks. However, since it's an astral projection and he's not actually there, the blade goes right through them without any damage, like nothing even happened.)

(The astral projection of Killer Laurence fades away.)

(Sutton presses a few buttons on what looks like an old pager, and soon enough, they're teleported back to GEOGRAM's base.)

(BZZZZT!!!)

CHAPTER 4, ACT 6: UPROOTED

(As it turns out, her warehouse is actually located in the outskirts of the Canadian side of Niagra Falls, which Futaba found out for us.)

(We immediately bust open the door to find...)

(...Carol Cross, still in her cage.)

Mrs. Cross, I'll have to ask you to step back.

(Carol give Violet a nod as she uses Leadhead to cut a hole through the bars of the prison cell.)

(Carol gives her son a hug, as I use my wheelchair to teleport her out.)

(However, the moment I do that...)

AWW...HOW NICE TO SEE YOU GOT YOUR MOTHER OUT OF THAT CAGE. TOO BAD YOU'RE ALL ABOUT TO BE TORN APART AND THEN MADE MY LUNCH!

Sweet fucking lord...

(I shake my head to snap myself out of it.)

Well, what are we standing around for? ATTACK!

(We all begin attacking Kelso, however, after a bit, Kelso grabs me out of nowhere.)

GOODBYE, MISTER NARRATOR.

WAIT NO NO WAI---

(GULP!)

(You cannot be fucking serious. Kelso ate Kyle...?!)

AND NOW FOR THE REST OF YOU!

Hey, Kelso! I'm still alive in here!

WAIT, WHAT?!

(HOLY SHIT! Kyle's still alive! And from the sounds of things, he's completely unharmed!)

Yeah, it'll take more than stomach acid to get rid of me. And by the way, it fucking REEKS in here! Haven't you ever heard of a breath mint?

AND HAVE YOU EVER HEARD OF BEING DIGESTED?

Kelso, I think the proper term here would actually be...

..."being vomited out".

(Carol, Laurence and Lily suddenly smash through the upper windows. They all begin a three-person attack on Kelso.)

(First, Carol uppercuts Kelso, knocking her down to the ground, belly up.)

(Then, Lily uses her scythe to cut some spotlights from the roof that drop down directly onto Kelso's now-exposed gut, and the hits cause her to vomit Kyle and his wheelchair out.)

I'm covered in puke along with my wheelchair, but other than that, yeah, I'm fine. Thanks, Lily.

(Then finally, Laurence rushes in and injects her with chemicals to turn her back into a human.)

(Kyle, you think you can narrate again?)

(Yeah, I think I can do that.)

(We all surround Kelso, who is now back to normal. I drive my wheelchair over to her, whip out a tranquilizer dart gun, and aim it at her.)

I did not enjoy that, Kelso, and I'm undoubtably going to have to take an incredibly long and incredbly thorough shower after this. Regardless, it's over. We've won. Surrender willingly or we will be forces to take non-lethal action.

(Kelso suddenly whips out a detonator from her pocket. She clicks it...and nothing happens.)

Nice fucking try. We saw your bombs earlier and disarmed all of them.

(A small explosion goes off on the catwalks, causing a piece of the catwalk to fall to the floor, and the metal roof to bend upwards.)

(I immediately facepalm with the hand currently not holding my tranquilizer dart gun.)

(sigh...) Damnit, Alter...

At least the roof's just bent and the part of the catwalk that got blown off is still intact. I can fix that easily.

Regardless, Kelso, this is your last chance to come with us willingly.

Don't worry, I'll do it myself.

(Kelso grabs the tranquilizer dart gun I had been aiming at her, and aims it at her own head.)

If you want to try and redeem me once I'm in that holding cell of yours, be my guest. But I won't give in to you so easily.

And if I'm going out...

...I'm going out on my own terms.

(She shoots herself with the tranquilizer dart gun, causing herself to collapse onto the floor, unconsious.)

Well...that was...unexpected.

What about the Chaos Creation Center? We HAVE always wanted a Niagra Falls location.

Let's grab Kelso and head back to base.

(All of us are in fancy tuxedos, as this is a formal event. Thankfully, after a very long shower, I'm ready to go.)

(I drive my wheelchair up to the podium, and begin talking.)

NEVER SURRENDER!

(The audience begins cheering for all of us directly after chanting that.)

(I drive off the podium, having finished my speech...however, I quickly do a U-turn as I realized I forgot some names.)

(As the audience laughs at Adam's sudden intrusion, I drive off the podium and over to the others.)

Hey, wanna head back to Niagra Falls? Clifton Hill's a-waiting!

(Alter quickly finishes the champagne he poured into his "What in the Kentucky fried fuck" mug, and nods his head "yes" excitedly.)

Beam us up, Scottie...I mean, Kyle!

(I let out a chuckle at Vi's joke.)

No need to tell me twice, guys! Let's get going!

(I aim the teleportation for Niagara Falls' Clifton Hill area, and immediately teleport us there for an amazingly fun celebration for a job well-done.)

(Malice Lily is currently outside in the freezing cold of Siberian Russia, wearing her rabbit mask to ensure nobody sees her face.)

(Thomas Tanker, now wearing a bulky, yet ornate suit of armor that has been enchanted by Malice Lily's malice magic, bows at the evil Malice Lily's feet.)

Yes, o great Malice Lily. It has finally been completed.

(Malice Lily grabs Thomas' head and begins caressing it in a sultry manner.)

Of course, my dearest Malice Lily.

(Thomas walks Lily into the the ornate castle, and directly onto her throne. She tosses her mask off immediately sits down onto it, as the queen of her castle/stronghold.)

Before I leave, my dearest Malice Lily, I would like to say we found another person from beyond this realm. He had accidentally hopped into this world in a hallucinatory daze.

(Two guards wearing medival suits of malice-magic enhanced armor bring in the Laurence Burnway from "What if Laurence Burnway won Operation: Prowling Spider?". His eyes widen when he sees the sight before him.)

(Malice Lily zaps the alternate Laurence, and he suddenly looks at Lily with clarity he didn't have before.)

(The alternate Laurence gives Malice Lily a hand, motioning for her to shake it.)

(Laurence puts his hand to his chin in thought. After a few moments, a lightbulb goes off in his head. He killed the CSB, the Toppats, the Government, and even GEOGRAM in his world. He killed all of them. KILLED. The word is right there! As such, he immediately decides on a name...)

(Malice Lily and Killer Laurence shake on it. Malice Lily then gives him a new outfit with another malice magic spell.)

(Killer Laurence is now wearing a jet-black leather jacket with a black long-sleeved sport shirt, a pair of jet-black leather pants, black socks with black spiked cleats, black leather gloves, and a Ghostface mask that has black skin and white eye and mouthholes [an inversion of the actual Ghostface mask colors].)

(The deal has been made, and while Malice Lily is still the head of the show, Killer Laurence is now her right-hand man. Looks like we now have two alternate timeline lunatics to watch out for.)

...unfortunately, that loud crashing sound is Kelso grabbing Phantom 1 mid-teleportation and smashing him into a set of lab equipment.)

YOU'RE NOT GOING ANYWHERE, MOTHERFUCKER.

Kelso, please, watch the suit! I just dry-cleaned it, you know.

LISTEN TO ME AND LISTEN TO ME GOOD, PHANTOM 1. TELL MY FATHER THAT IF HE HATES ME, FINE. I'LL DO HIS JOB FOR HIM. I WILL RIP THOSE FIVE FUCKING IDIOTS IN HALF AND WATCH THEM BLEED OUT ONTO THE FLOOR. IT'LL BE EASY, LIKE BREAKING A FUCKING TOOTHPICK. I'LL FINALLY TAKE THOSE CONDECENDING SONS OF BITCHES DOWN MYSELF.

AND WOULD YOU JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP ALREADY? I WOULD CALL YOU BY YOUR REAL NAME TO INTIMIDATE YOU, BUT UNFORTUNATELY, YOU DON'T SEEM TO HAVE ONE!

Of course I do, my dear Kelso. You've been calling me by it the whole time.

WAIT...YOU'RE TELLING ME THAT YOUR REAL NAME IS ACTUALLY "PHANTOM ONE"?

Of course it is! I'm gobsmacked you hadn't realized that earlier! I had it legally changed to that a long time ago. I've since destroyed any and all documents that had that blasted old name of mine printed out onto them, and tragically, all the people that knew my name have all since died in the line of duty.

ALRIGHT, I GET THE FUCKING PICTURE ALREADY. NOW GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY SIGHT SO I CAN HAVE SOME PEACE AND QUIET FOR ONCE.

Gladly, you brute. Hmph!

(Phantom One teleports away, scoffing at what Kelso has become.)

OH SHUT THE FUCK UP, CROSS. THIS IS WHAT I WAS WAITING FOR THIS ENTIRE TIME. THE CSB, THE TOPPATS AND GEOGRAM. ALL GETTING TORN TO SHREDS. ISN'T IT ABSOLUTELY CATHARTIC? ACTUALLY, I GUESS IT'D BE MORE "CHAOTIC" FOR YOU, HUH?

IF THE CSB IS LUCKY AND DEFEATS ME AND SURVIVES MY ONSLAUGHT, YOU'RE FREE TO GO.

(Kelso opens her now-monsterous jaw at Carol.)

YOU AND THE REST OF THEM ARE LUNCH.

(Kelso then snaps her jaw shut.)

HEY, MAINTAINING THIS FORM TAKES A LOT OF ENERGY. YOU'D BE SURPRISED AT WHAT I'M WILLING TO EAT RIGHT NOW TO MAINTAIN IT.

(Kelso walks to the other end of the warehouse, as her Vipers begin bringing in an entire farm's worth of live animals for Kelso to eat, just to ensure she doesn't black out in her monstrous form.)

(If there was any part of Kelso that had even the slightest shred of dignity and/or sanity, well, it just got fucking OBLITERATED FROM ORBIT. You're going to get what you fucking deserve, Kelso. -K)