CRUSTACEANS FOR DINNER (THE AQUATIC TRILOGY)

CRUSTACEANS FOR DINNER (POEMS) (The Aquatic Trilogy) Tikum Mbah Azonga. WOMAN WITH THE BANGLE She was here She was here just a while ago But when the cock crowed She picked up her bangle and left Without a forwarding address Without a word. 2. WHAT OUR PRIEST DID I waited all day for him But when he came He took it for a game And dropped hot candle wax on my wrist. It`s good to fight for one’s rights But if it`s all a gamble Then stop and think You`re not re-inventing the wheel. 4. WHAT WE ORDERED It was only a bike But it was better than a hike So when we next ordered cheese rolls We knew what we were talking about. 5. LET ME SPEAK I asked why Not because I was incredulous But because I wanted assurances So, don`t mock me. 6. WHAT DOES IT TAKE? Yes, the swan bird`s song was sweet That`s why it held me spell-bound You`ve stood here for ages Yet, nothing moves you Not the multiple choruses of frogs and toads Or even the hissing of the valley snakes So, tell me What exactly does it take? 7. THE FLOWING TAP I stood there, aghast and helpless Watching the bucket overflow On the opposite with a defiant smile They turned on the tap to full capacity. 8. HER STRANDED THING She called it the stranded thing Just because she wasn`t ready when it needed her But did she think of what would have happened If she needed him and he wasn`t ready too? 9. THE HOLLOW GONG It didn`t matter The only thing that mattered was the gong Yet it sounded hollow And I couldn`t find a desperate buyer. 10. THE SHEEP SHEARER It sounded like a bee hum Far from Cecilia`s old bum But when I got nearer I found it was sheep shearer. 11. OUR OWN KNOW-HOW I really don`t know how But I know where So if you`re not there What then happens to our vow? 12. THIS ROUGH CHIN OF YOURS Your chin is rough Because you think you`re tough But when you`re challenged Will you still feel privileged? 13. THE CHIBOK GIRLS Don`t say that How can you? The day is still young And our girls aren`t yet back. 14. STRANDED BECAUSE OF A BONE Has he gone Or is he struck? If he`s run out of luck Then what he needs now is another fat bone. 15. NO FEE FOR PAY RISE It has dawned on me So I won`t be a fool twice If there has only been one pay rise How do you expect us to pay the fee? 16. ANCESTRAL DUST It looks too hollow So who will follow? If we`re all so full of disgust Isn`t it because of the ancestral dust? 17. OF CURSES AND THE LOW We are at crossroads Yet we speak at cross purposes Why should it be so? If it wasn`t because of curses Why would we be so low? 18. MANCHESTER PHOTOS FOR THE CAMEROON PRESIDENT They came from the house opposite Someone threw them at us I don`t know who They just flew in through the window And landed on the floor carpet They were in a medium-sized brown envelope But the envelope bore no address When trembling I opened it I found it contained pictures of the Queen I mean the Queen and her second husband But the pictures were so old and so rusty Who kept them with such carelessness? Out of curiosity I turned them over They were seven And behind each was the inscription “To the King, my husband”. I couldn`t understand because The Queen was in her second marriage So which husband was it? These were neither pictures of the queen nor the king They were of an unknown couple Who looked like The President and First Lady of Zimbabwe Zimbabwe of all places! Why so, I wondered Just then a violent wind blew in from outside Then I heard a female voice whisper in my ear “Don`t bother! It`s not everything that You should understand. But if you don`t like the pictures Send them to the President of Cameroon!” 19. RENDERING TO GOD AND TO CAESAR I shall not squeak I`m not a mouse I shall sing I`m God`s creation. 20. THE MISSING WEDDING RING She leapt over it, oblivious But it bounced back When she picked it It was the wedding ring of ten years ago. 21. A CRY FOR HELP We went the wrong way All day we trudged with our children on our backs Our feet too weary to carry us But our fellow human beings All the time sent us the wrong signals We stopped at a stream to drink But its water turned into blood We put our children down to ease ourselves When we returned they were infested with measles We removed our garments, washed and sunned them When we picked them up, they were smeared with excreta We asked for the way to the nearest church Instead we were sent to the Witch doctor We said “hello” to the people we met on our way Instead, they told us, “Go to hell!” When they asked for our names and we told them They gave us different names They renamed us Like they would rename newly-bought dogs We pitched camp under a friendly tree When we woke up It was a jungle overrun by wild animals We knelt down and prayed to God Instead someone appeared in a vision And asked us to re-examine ourselves So where do we belong? Can anyone out there help us? 22. THESE EYES OF MINE My eyes – these eyes Have seen some But not all These poor eyes of mine are Too small for things too big And too big for things too small They`re often accused of seeing too much Sometimes of seeing too little And sometimes of not seeing at all Perhaps it`s because they look weak And can`t don`t spell-bound The attacking bird snatching our only chick But who sees everything at any time, anyway? Who? Apart from Him who made us And gave us our eyes? 23. OH, MOTHER NATURE! ` I wasn`t here when you came I just grew up seeing you But, honestly, aren`t you awesome! You`re so wide and so beautiful You have room for everyone You are the wind You are the air You are the rain You are the sunshine You are the moonlight You are the clouds You are the countless wondrous stars You are the fauna You are the flora You are the aqua You are God You are all of us You are everything You are present How reassuring! 24. THE HUNT THAT YIELDS FRUIT He went out to the sea shore To search for sea shells And brought back plenty All of resplendent and multicolored And everyone wanted a piece. Today he went out to catch hissing crickets At night time He only brought back a few Because when a cricket ran into its hole And he started digging He was stung by a lurking snake Yet no one gave a damn. 25. RAIN FOR THOSE COMING I`m dreaming But I`m not meddling If they come again I`ll simply call the rain. 26. A JOKE FOR THE BLOKE It was just a joke One, meant for the bloke So if you took it amiss You`re nothing but a Miss. 27. THE ONE YOU OWE That`s the person we owe So, how is he a fee? If he were against you You would no longer be two. 28. OUR PRESIDENT AND THE PALACE That`s how it is Take it or leave it But if the president sneezes Don`t show him the road to the palace. 29. LEADS FOR FAITH Let`s now lower the leads And by all means keep the faith If she says she isn`t Faith Let`s then cross out all the leads. 30. THE FON`S MESSAGE The sky is dark That`s why the kinsmen are out When the Sub Chief arrives Who will then hail the Fon? 31. THE EYES THAT MET (For Patience) I am the apple of his eye, you know? He told me so He whispered it to me And I know it myself I could tell from the look in his face But he also uttered it himself It came from his own lips He declared and proclaimed it Here at the foot of the Mountain During the working session. Deeply, I`m only a servant keeping so low One who didn`t deal any blow One who knows all the books on her shelf While keeping her place in the human race I`m a gift from God himself That`s why I`ve made so many trips Whenever I`ve deemed it fit For this gift I thank my one and only fountain For showering me with so much unction. 32. THE LATE-NIGHT DRUNKARD It was late night when he returned He staggered and stumbled and wobbled Too drunk to hold himself together He knocked at his neighbor`s door When the latter`s wife opened Pedro crashed into her hands As if it was his own wife What an ugly sight! Those trousers bespattered with excreta and urine That shirt stained by blood from self-injury Angered, Mami Odilia`s husband Rushed to him And dragged him into the street Battered, bleeding, groaning and cursing He struggled to rise but fell back Alone, abandoned, rejected, disowned Poor Ma Magdalene That`s how she found her husband She and the overwhelmed children She couldn’t cry It was beyond her They managed to bundle the messed-up drunkard And took him to their home Battered, bleeding, groaning and cursing everyone He tried to fight back He was muttering Calling the name of his neighbor`s wife “O..di…li….a!” 33. THE THING I DO I don`t scam I count So when I see the fount I kneel down and pray. 34. FREE FOR EVER We`re here, all of us And without fuss too We came early enough As agreed. We didn`t bring the bus For fear of needing the loo By nature we`re not rough Because forever we`ve been freed. 35. LETTER TO MY DADDY (For Brigitte) Daddy, I wish you were here If you were here Things would be so much easier Time would be nothing So would space Everything would be one And I`d be in one place Having everything And wanting nothing. But alas, you`re not here You were to me so dear But life became trickier And tasted like lime Life became a mad race But I know that with the holy one I have a kingdom of a place I shall want nothing Because he`ll give me everything. 36. TALKING ABOUT TITHES IN CHICAGO It`s a long range So, forget about the sun tan An evening trek to Chicago no longer matters What counts is your tithe. 37. THAT THING CALLED EDUCATION Education! Education in all its forms What a word! What a thought! What a thing! You rule the world From Moscow to Dschang You transcend generations From Adam to me From the beginning to the end From the Alpha to the Omega. You are geographic and geographical You migrate Longitudinally And latitudinally Sometimes as a stalactite At other times as a stalagmite. You are the waters of the river Through the tree stages You are the monsoon winds and the temperate regions You empty your bowels into the mighty ocean And it swallows them up Despite its ecosystem And the ecology. Education You are so bi You are so broad You are so wide You are so wise. 38. DANCING ON MY TWO FEET (For Rodas) I love dancing That`s what I love doing most Dancing makes me feel good It makes me feel on top of the world It makes me look younger It lifts me up to higher heights. It`s not that I hate singing No, I thank the Lord of host But music is spiritual food That`s why I dance every word Not like a stranger But like someone who knows her rights. 39. WHAT MUSIC DOES TO ME (For N.F.) I like music It`s the sweetest thing ever It penetrates me It pervades me It lifts me higher and higher That`s what music does to me. If I were just a classic I`d think myself clever But then, I have paid no fee That`s why daily I go on my knee To thank him for making me better Without his music, wouldn`t I just flee? 40. THE IMMEDIATE EXERCISE (For Imbolo) You mean, now? Or is it later? Isn`t it a bit too abrupt? On the spot Right here, right now? Can I really do it Or shall I ask my group? However, I accept it with a bow Because it will make me better Nothing will I disrupt Not even the tiniest dot There shall be no row Because, this poem I worked for it If I`ve lost anything, that will I recoup. 41. THE FORGOTTEN JACKET He did it He did it alone He did it all alone He did it for us He did it for all of us But we scorned him. He came back He came back early on Monday morning When he came up the stairs, he knocked But we spat him We told him off Later we found his jacket at the doorstep But could not find him To give it back to him. 42. THE FLYING DOVE I looked through the open window And saw him moving towards the mantle Then he raised his left hand And a dove flew from it When I looked again It was the man flying. 43. ACTION TIME Keep talking But stop stalking Reveal yourself Get out of your shelf See the RAV 4 And own it today. 44. WHAT MY NEIGHBOURS SAY I started out early And respected all men No blood disease was ever an obstacle I was guided by the spirit of God. I once grew barley And kept a hen But I had no oracle Rather, my only oracle was God. 45. WHO GOD IS God You are Lord The Almighty The greatest of all The all and all Everything The Alpha and the Omega. 46. A WORLD APART You are not of their world Their world is different from yours That`s why it`s not in the book Only other things are in the book. 47. ONLY HE ALONE You may read but not understand You may look but not see You may listen but not hear You may talk but not speak Only he can. 48. GETTING RID OF LOOSE ENDS Why wait? Get up and crash it But also, wait and pick up the pieces Don`t leave any loose ends. 49. THE PHENOMENON OF FEAR (Persona non grata) Fear is criminal It is evil It creeps in through the backdoor Then engulfs us like some senile volcano And pushes us out through the main door It dictates to us and we go at its bidding It makes us abuse, challenge, Destroy, maim, betray, murder Tear up in pieces and throw away In the end We are helpless Taken hostage We abdicate and sell our birth right What to do is bar all the doors and windows Then it won`t come in. 50. ME AS A STALKER Come out and talk Don`t talk from inside That`s why the gap is wide Unless you want to stalk. 51. MEN OUT OF GEAR Men don`t walk They run Then when they run out of gear They walk and cry. 52. SEASONAL MOODS In winter, she wept In autumn, she smiled In spring, she laughed In summer, she danced. 53. CLOCK FOR AUCTION I knew it had to happen Once I saw him hasten If only we had paused to take stock We wouldn`t have needed to auction the clock. 54. THE ROAD TO YORK Field work or no field work Let`s put our heads together When fresh leaves start to wither Remember the old road to York. 55. A NAIL FOR OLA I need a nail Not for me, but for Ola So that if you harm her by the tail She can flee to Yola. 56. A CUP FOR US ALL I want all of them to come up All, without exception There`s room here from everyone So, don`t count yourself out. We must each lift a cup According to the latest fashion One for all and all for one Each of us before our own bout. 57. POINT OF NO RETURN Why are the flowers withered? And we stand here wondering? Don`t we know the die is cast And we`ve reached the point of no return? 58. MY DOUR HOUR I knew the day But I didn`t know the hour That`s why when she failed to hold sway My limbs went sour. 59. ANOTHER NAME FOR MADNESS I wasn`t naked But I was sacred Everyone else was hungry And you call me, mad? 60. THE DANGER OF IMITATION (Douglas Hurd as heard) This is a word It`s not a bird So if you want to imitate Douglas Hurd Then don`t say you haven`t heard. 61. THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT It`s a right and not a privilege So don`t place any conditions Tomorrow when you`re accused of sacrilege Don`t say you`re not responsible for your actions. 62. THE UNWORTHY PATCHWORK Where have you been? I`ve looked for you everywhere Now that the sky is overcast How shall we square things up? 63. A BELT FOR A HICCUP My belt is too tight If this were a fight I would have rung you up So that you stop that dreaded hiccup 64. THE BRITISH DARE-DEVIL This is a word And not a bird So if you want to imitate Douglas Hurd Then don`t say you haven`t heard. 65. A SOVEREIGN RIGHT It`s a right and not a privilege So don`t impose any conditions Tomorrow when you`re accused of sacrilege Don`t say you`re not responsible for your actions. 66. IN SEARCH OF THE LOST ONE Where have you been? I`ve looked for you everywhere Now that the sky is overcast How shall we square things up? 67. A ROMAN WITHOUT AN EMPIRE You`re not a robot You`re human So, if you see Libot Call him a Roman. 68. TO BE OR NOT TO BE Don`t be blacklisted Be shortlisted But if you`re wait-listed Then make sure you`re duly visited. 69. THE CATHODE AND THE ANODE This is not the right code It`s not the appropriate contact point If you feel numb at the joint Then you`ve lost the cathode. 70. ALL THE HACKED ACCOUNTS That day will come Whether you like it or not So, prepare yourself for it There’s no turning back None will be welcome Latecomers will be allowed to rot Nobody will be able to fake it Everything will just look hacked. 71. ALONE WITHOUT THE GROOMS You Can’t do it that way There’s only one option That of Gobson But you must bring hammers and brooms You can’t stand at bay Because even you have your portion Even if you live in Boston Because you lost your grooms. 72. UNFAIR TO YOU I came alone So that you we could fix it I didn’t bring my shovel Because I didn’t want to scare you. But now that you’re just a bone And far from being a hit How can I begin to shovel? That would be unfair to you. 73. FOR QUEEN AND COUNTRY You sang well But you didn’t dance well That’s why the queen pulled you out She is the alpha and the omega. Even so, if you dig into the royal well Where our ancestors used to dwell And you find the rout You’ll be the queen’s alpha and Omega. 70. PARLIAMENTARY PROCEDURE Give it another thought But don’t be rash Ass long as it’s not thrash Consider it well wrought. 71. GET UP AND WALK By all means and for once Stand up and be counted Drown yourself in your own sorrows And this day will be your last. You’re losing more than an ounce With so much angst vented Just look at your face furrows And you wonder why I’m aghast?