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    Rom Com
    Rom Com
    Rom Com
    Ebook160 pages1 hour

    Rom Com

    By Dina Del Bucchia and Daniel Zomparelli

    4.5/5

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    About this ebook

    At precisely the cultural moment you were hoping for, a dream team of smart, sexy, brunette, West Coast poets of Italian descent has passionately co-authored an intelligent collection of poetry that both celebrates and capsizes the romantic comedy.

    From the origin of the genre (It Happened One Night) to its contemporary expressions (Love Actually), the poems in Rom Com trace the attempt to deconstruct as well as engage in dialogue with romantic comedy films and the pop culture, celebrities, and tropes that have come to be associated with them. These irreverent, playful, weird, and comedic poems come in a variety of forms, fully engaging in pop culture, without a judgmental tone. They see your frumpy expectations and raise you issues of sexuality, consent, sexism, homophobia, race, and class. They explore the highs and lows of romantic relationships and the expectations and realities of love, tackling real emotional worlds through the lens of film.

    Two cool people wrote it. Dina Del Bucchia, the fashionable and voluptuous, is a woman on the go, brazenly hosting literary events and tweeting about otters and award shows. Daniel Zomparelli, the handsome and dashing, is a young, gay man-about-Vancouver who somehow also quietly edits (in chief) a semi-annual poetry journal. (Ship them all you want, fools.)

    How to tell if you are compatible with this book: Are you equally versed in literature and pop culture? Are you a film-savvy fan of contemporary poetry? Are you an academic with interest in literature and cultural studies? Are you in general a cool, sad person? This book might just be the sassy best friend you’ve wanted.

    LanguageEnglish
    PublisherTalonbooks
    Release dateDec 15, 2015
    ISBN9780889229983
    Rom Com
    Author

    Dina Del Bucchia

    Dina Del Bucchia is the author of the short-story collection Don’t Tell Me What to Do and of three collections of poetry: Coping with Emotions and Otters, Blind Items, and Rom Com, the latter written with Daniel Zomparelli. She is an editor of Poetry Is Dead magazine, the artistic director of the Real Vancouver Writers’ Series, and a co-host of the podcast Can’t Lit with Jen Sookfong Lee. An otter and dress enthusiast, she lives on the unceded territories of the xʷməθkʷəy̓əm (Musqueam), Sḵwx̱wú7mesh (Squamish), and səl̓ilwətaɁɬ (Tsleil-Waututh) First Nations (Vancouver, British Columbia).

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      Book preview

      Rom Com - Dina Del Bucchia

      To print your own copies of the Dina and Daniel paper dolls, visit our website!

      Big mistake. Big. Huge!

      –Pretty Woman

      Rom Com

      Contents

      SHE WALKED OFF THE STREET INTO HIS LIFE AND STOLE HIS HEART

      Meet Cute

      It Happened One Night

      Provincial Gym Monkeys and/or All the Places to Meet the Love of Your Life

      Your Apartment

      Gender Equation

      Bobs and Weaves

      You Need Abs to Be in Love

      Jennifer Aniston

      Jennifer Lopez

      Jennifer Lawrence

      Easy A

      50 First Kates

      Eat, Pray, Love

      You’re Supposed to Be Engaged

      Jokes

      Punchline

      The Funny Thing Is

      Matthew McConaughey’s Abs

      Matthew McConaughey’s Arms

      Porn Parodies: Dick Edition

      Porn Parodies: Vagina Edition

      QUIZ: Ever Wondered If You Might Be the City as a Character in a Romantic Comedy?

      Slow Motion

      Adam Sandler: A Love Story

      What’s Not to Love, Adam Sandler?

      (500) Dicks of Summer

      Dicks Actually

      A Series of Romantic Comedies That Could Never Be Made

      Valentine’s Day

      What’s Your Number?

      She’s All That

      50 First Dates

      Line, Please

      IT'S FUNNY WHAT LOVE CAN MAKE YOU DO

      Unrequited Love

      Unrequited Love 2: Even More Unrequited

      Morning Wood: The 40-Year-Old Virgin

      Some Like It Hot

      Romantic Opposites-Attract Comedies: Your preferences created this row.

      QUIZ: Screwball Mix ’N’ Match

      Sex Scene

      Sex Scene (revision)

      Your Boobs

      Asshole

      How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days, or Asshole

      People Are Assholes!

      You Did That on Your Own

      Definitely, Maybe

      In a Movie about Weddings No One Wants to Attend

      In a Movie about Weddings No One Wants to Attend 2: Even Less Interested

      So I Married a Poet

      Funny Face

      But Hocus Pocus Isn’t Even a Rom Com?

      You Are the Devil, I (Should) Have Said

      Montage

      Romantic Comedies for Young Girls:

      Hollow Ship to Hell

      The Rose

      YOU CAN’T ALWAYS RUN FROM YOUR PAST

      Emotionally Broken

      Because You Watched 27 Dresses

      Overboard

      He’s Just Not That into You

      I Am So Lonely, I Am So Fucking Lonely, lol, SEND, Obvious Child

      He Grasps at Emotion, or The Proposal

      You’re Supposed to Be Engaged

      Puff Puff, Give. Puff Puff, Give

      Acting

      The Acting Was Fantastic

      Forgetting Sarah Marshall

      You Fell for the Wrong Girl

      But Maybe He Wasn’t Really a Person

      On Every Television Channel

      This Is Considered Adorable

      Titanic

      The Stories You Build

      Nora Ephron

      QUIZ: Ever Wondered If You Might Be the Best Friend of a Romantic Lead?

      Sonnets for Supporting Roles:

      Rita, Bridesmaids

      Dionne, Clueless

      Muriel, It Could Happen to You

      George, My Best Friend's Wedding

      Kit, Pretty Woman

      Christmas

      Love Actually

      When Harry Met Sally

      Five-Star Rating

      The Movie Will Be a Disappointment

      What’s Happening Onscreen Isn’t Relatable

      Harold and Maude

      New Year’s Eve

      Soundtrack

      Everything Is Bad Choices that Make Me Feel Good

      Credits

      Blooper Reel

      About the Authors

      SHE WALKED OFF THE STREET INTO HIS LIFE AND STOLE HIS HEART

      Meet Cute

      Spill sticky fruit juice on someone’s important papers.

      Wear a torn tracksuit, jog at the corner where luxury cars drive daily.

      Let your dog run into the street and hope for a beautiful hero instead of blood.

      Open your big, loud mouth and offend.

      Order an egg cream at a diner; hide your disgust as you taste the creamy soda.

      Pretend to be a golf enthusiast and pitch a nine iron into the rough.

      Reach for the Fig Newtons at your local, organic, free-range grocery.

      Get trapped in the subway station train for several hours and talk loudly on your phone to important people about how important you are.

      Trip and fall near someone’s butt.

      Meet quickly.

      It Happened One Night

      It was a hate-until-you-love,

      opposites-attract, sexual-tension thing.

      It was a nice touch: banter

      fresh as bobs and finger waves in 1934.

      It sent a shiver. She was set up

      by men who claimed to love her.

      It happened to pave a small piece of road

      for other women to click-clack down.

      It’s not so different now, expectations,

      how love should blossom into white gowns.

      It won all top five Oscars that year,

      the first to claim that fame.

      It wouldn’t happen like that now,

      get serious.

      Provincial Gym Monkeys and/or

      All the Places to Meet the Love of Your Life

      The gym.

      A coffee shop.

      A Hawaiian vacation.

      Through work.

      In the red-light district.

      While being arrested.

      The Internet.

      The

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