The Ghost of Suzuko

Vincent Brault

THE GHOST OF SUZUKO

Translated from the French by

Benjamin Hedley

QCfiction

Revision: Peter McCambridge

Proofreading: Daniel J. Rowe, Guil Lefebvre

Book design: Folio infographie

Cover & logo: Maison 1608 by Solisco

Cover art: Getty Images

Fiction editor: Peter McCambridge

All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the publishers.

Copyright © 2021 Héliotrope

Originally published under the title Le fantôme de Suzuko by Héliotrope, 2021 (Montréal, Québec)

Translation copyright © Benjamin Hedley

ISBN 978-1-77186-276-9 pbk; 978-1-77186-277-6 epub; 978-1-77186-278-3 pdf

Legal Deposit, 2nd quarter 2022

Bibliothèque et Archives nationales du Québec

Library and Archives Canada

Published by QC Fiction, an imprint of Baraka Books

Printed and bound in Québec

Trade Distribution & Returns

Canada - UTP Distribution: UTPdistribution.com

United States & World - Independent Publishers Group: IPGbook.com

We acknowledge the financial support for translation and promotion of the Société de développement des entreprises culturelles (SODEC), the Government of Québec tax credit for book publishing administered by SODEC, the Government of Canada, and the Canada Council for the Arts.

Table of Contents

Crédits

1

2

Points de repère

Couverture

The blank empty space unfolds, containing nothing within. It holds nothing more than an expanse of desolate absence. Hiromi Kawakami, translated by Allison Markin Powell

Strange Weather in Tokyo

1

Sorry, I’m not sure if I’m in the right place… Ono Ayumi invited me, but… I forgot my phone… so if I remember right…

Voices and electronic music inside the house.

You’re in the right place, come in! Ayumi’ll be happy to see you.

Yeah?

Of course she will! I’ll go get her.

I take my shoes off in the entryway. Press my palms hard against my eyes. Burns a little. So strange to be back here. I breathe in. Breathe out slowly. Breathe in again. I’ll be alright.

I’ve been to Ayumi’s maybe once or twice before. Hypnotic music. Takamasa. Maybe twenty people in the living room. Three girls in metallic one-piece suits standing in front of a low, curved, narrow couch. Cold lighting. Makes your skin glassy. Polished cement floor. Exposed cement wall. Cracks and holes. Two long rectangular windows overlooking an inner courtyard. A few people I know here. Black nylon socks. Loose beige blouses. Grey shirts. Belted skirts above the navel. Crimson jackets. Fine straight leg pants and tights. I stick out like a sore thumb. And not just because of the jeans and tatty brown wool sweater I’m wearing. I feel out of place. I did have a shower this morning but that was before two planes and two bus rides. Hour and a half on a bike too.

All because of the earthquake.

Helmet still in my hands. Orange, loud like the three girls in one-pieces. Not as chic, though. People greet me. Smile at me. And turn around then, whisper things I only half hear.

He was with Suzuko…

…I didn’t know he was back…

I thought he looked different…

…everyone knew Suzuko…

I wonder what they did with her head…

Huge urge to run for my life suddenly but then someone asks me what the helmet’s for.

Uhh… oh… It’s because of the earthquake, caught me by surprise, you didn’t feel it?

Eeeh! No, not at all!

He laughs.

I forgot what they were like. I ran out quickly, forgot my phone, wallet, keys, and rode here from Sumida.

Whoa! That’s twenty kilometres from here!

I had no choice. Luckily I have a good memory, didn’t have much trouble finding Ayumi’s hou–

Her winter complexion. Prominent cheekbones.

Ayumi! I didn’t know if I’d make it here in time, but…

I’m so happy to see you, Vincent.

She throws herself into my arms.

Time flies. Three months already.

Yeah.

She takes a step back. The paleness of her legs. Their reflection on the polished cement floor.

It’s good that you’re here… really.

Then she buries her face in her hands. Laughing or crying?

You ok, Ayumi?

I’m ok.

She takes a deep breath and then forces herself to smile.

Did you fly in today?

Yeah, a few hours ago. I thought—

Stop. Tell me later! Let’s get you a drink first!

Ono Ayumi spent her twenties in London, studying art history. She’s 36, 37 now, maybe, but if you met her on the street you’d swear she was ten years younger.

She runs a contemporary art gallery on the ground floor of the most magnificent building in Ginza, a skyscraper so delicate-looking you’d think it’d go flying off if the wind picked up. The first time I set foot in the place was for Li Yi-Fan’s vernissage.

6:51. Red numbers. White sheets. The edge of the bed, a steep cliff. No one on my left. Or on my right. It’s… ah yes… the party… Ayumi’s. Still here, I guess. Her room. Morning? Evening? No idea. Jet lag. The house. Dead quiet. My jeans on the floor at the foot of the bed. My t-shirt folded on the night table. My body heavy. I want to go back to sleep but I force myself to get up, put my jeans on, my t-shirt. It smells wonderfully fresh. I bury my face in it. The smell of Japanese washing detergent. It’s all coming back to me now. I leave the room.

Ayumi?

Not in the living room or the garden or the kitchen. Nothing out of place. Not a single thing. I go back to the bedroom. I need a shower, desperately, but I make the bed first. A small piece of paper, on the floor. It must have fallen off the night table when I flicked my t-shirt.

Dear Vincent,

You’re sleeping and I dare not wake you, but it’s 2 in the afternoon and I have to leave. I have an appointment at the gallery, and I’m going out with friends afterwards. Please, make yourself at home and feel free to use the shower. I cleaned your t-shirt and sweater. No need to thank me, I had a load to clean anyways. I left your t-shirt beside the bed (you probably already found it). Your sweater is on the clothesline in the garden. I hope it’s dry when you wake up.

In case you forgot… I just want to remind you that last night (or very early this morning rather) you agreed to come talk about Suzuko at the gallery.

We’ll be expecting you Wednesday at 3, then. I hope I wasn’t being too pushy. You don’t have to prepare anything, really, it’s just a small, informal gathering, I’m only inviting people you know. We’ll chat before then, I’m sure. Anyways, welcome back to Tokyo. Have a great day. And see you soon.

Ayumi

I head straight for the shower. The bathroom fills with steam. My lungs too. My brain. Does me well. But it’s weird… I don’t remember Ayumi inviting me to talk about Suzuko at the gallery. Must be the fatigue. The jet lag. The alcohol. Woke up. In her bed. Couch looks hard as a rock. Did we sleep together? I don’t think so. Just passed out from the exhaustion, most likely. Jet lag. Alcohol. Yes. Must be it. She slept curled up on the narrow couch. Or not. Or a little. Maybe. Otherwise I’d remember something. I have to get out of the shower. Floor’s too cold. But the doorman in my building leaves at 10 p.m. I have to get home before that, else nobody’ll be there to let me in. And I’d be overstaying my welcome if I spent another night at Ayumi’s. Oh, Pavle’s, I could go there. He lives in Sumida too. Not too far from my place. But he doesn’t know I’m back. So nice in the shower. So cold outside. 6 degrees, at most. Not a fiber of my being wants to ride home on my bike. Night. Forever. The shower. The steam. The heat. Forever.

I close the door behind me and immediately I miss the comforts of Ayumi’s place. I hop on my bicycle. It’s gonna take a while. Raining. Kind of. The drops don’t fall, they’re stuck in the air, floating, forming an endless wall of mist which swallows me up. I ride. First, a narrow road, no sidewalks, lined with two-storey houses. Gropius style. Concrete facades, no obvious windows. Then, a service station at the intersection of a commercial street. I turn right in front of a 7-Eleven and ride until Yoyogi-Hachiman station. I hop off my bike, walk it along the dark, crowded passage under the train tracks. Shibuya. The mist turns to rain.