Uncapped Feelings

Uncapped Feelings

While every precaution has been taken in the preparation of this book, the publisher assumes no responsibility for errors or omissions, or for damages resulting from the use of the information contained herein.

UNCAPPED FEELINGS

First edition. September 11, 2024.

Copyright © 2024 T.Charles Rampedi.

ISBN: 979-8227856784

Written by T.Charles Rampedi.

Also by T.Charles Rampedi

Notebook

Through My Pen

Uncapped Feelings

Ember Of The Heart

A Collection Of Broken Things

Voyage Of Dreams

Table of Contents

Title Page

Copyright Page

Also By T.Charles Rampedi

Uncapped Feelings

Chapter One

Chapter Two

Chapter Three

Chapter Four

Chapter Five

Chapter Six

Chapter Seven

Chapter Eight

Chapter Nine

Chapter Ten

Chapter Eleven

Chapter Twelve

Chapter Thirteen

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fifteen

Chapter Sixteen

Chapter Seventeen

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I had a dream about you

Me and you.

We were seated on the couch dazzling each other with words that made you blush and smile like eternity came to see and told me welcome to heaven

The girl standing next to me

It was all just a blur

That's when I fell, and you fell over me

What did it mean?

Did it represent me falling in love with you, and you falling for me

On the ground I was able to see you perfectly

In my arms I was able to see the beauty that hid between your smile

As you were giggling the words you said, made me high even though I cannot recall them

You said them with a beautiful gaze while looking in my eyes

Free spirited self you were smiling

You were happy

And we turned to kiss

And I was enchanted by the lips of both I and you meeting

Like strawberries I was never denied their color

As I closed my eyes to get an alluring savor

After that majestic kiss

I turned to open my eyes, and you were gone

A river of lava was burning around I

I ran from the house you were in, to the other

As I arrived at the door it was locked

I knocked and knocked with my breath fading

I turned to open the door and landed in a room that seemed like mine

I looked at myself on the mirror trying to control my heavy breath, but I could not

I took off my hoodie and shirt

Sat down on the floor to let the coldness sink in my lungs to stop me from feeling the way I felt

But I couldn’t

So, I shouted out the pain

Just to realize, it was just another dream

A dream about you.

Define love, the meaning of it, a lot of words have been used to describe the feelings that revolve around that word, but none seems to match that feeling. None seem to be perfectly describing it, like my uncapped feelings. It's strange how life changes from generation to generation. All worldly wonders turn to change, so do feelings, and even love is no longer the same as that of the past. People get lost in the errors of this world, one might say it has always been said, seek wisdom from those that possess the hair that looks white or gray like the clouds up in the heavenly skies. In other words, with age comes wisdom, so seek it from those who possess it, for you to be wise. Well with this generation, wisdom is taken as something that involves control while it is to set a path, to guide, or heed. Those who seek it tend to get lost, as it doesn't go with the so-called today-style. It's either you become an outcast with the wisdom passed down to you or one of the crew without it, and loneliness turns to lurk on the streets searching for those lone wolf outcasts to do damage.

Seated with my mother, talking about this new generation which I'm in. Talking about the whole gender issues of this world, stating that feelings don't turn out to have anything to do with your gender, feelings are all about expression, the way we used to know and grew up knowing. Expressing your emotions about how you feel towards a certain subject or something. With gender, a gay was a man who had the sexual reproductive organ of a female, and a lesbian was a woman who had the sexual reproductive organ of a male, who were called tona kasadi in my home language.

These days all kids turn to say they are gays and lesbians, and now the titles of gender have even increased a lot because they turn to say they feel like they were supposed to be something else. Like the man who said he feels like he was supposed to be a dog, now he lives like one, or that other one who said he feels like he was supposed to be a baby, ironic.

Sleeping with someone and not feeling a certain way doesn't mean you must be attracted to the opposite gender; it just means that your spirit doesn't quite sit well with that person. It's like the saying, intercourses before marriage aren't right as quoted. Having it with a random person isn't going to sit well with your spirit, and remember, some of us, our spirits are hard to understand. That's why we mostly get lost and find whatever reason it is suitable to put on and say yes this is the reason, but what do I know, I am just old. Let this gray hair be my witness, I know nothing but the old, and this is the new, but the new needs to be made while looking at the old sometimes.

For me, if I turn to look at it with a certain eye, if it were me, and I was searching for something and the path I took isn't showing any progress that I'm going to find it, an alternative way has to be found which is going to lead me to having what I want, need sweets, and have no money, ask they say pay, but you have no money, you beg, you cry, and get angry, you take it, steal it, to be more accurate, we all did it when we were young, even if it's not based on stealing we all once took the easy way out. What's to change about love, politics, finding a job, etc.? We still do it.

Choose the easiest path to find what we seek but hard to approach it. It's hard to witness failure, and multiple times rips you apart to collapse, it's hard. Even with love, when it's hard to find love, or you do, but keep on falling in love with the wrong person over and over again and getting hurt, but you seek it with a lot of affection with all your heart, you turn to form an alternative, adapt to the pain, or change what you seek by just a little factor.

Maybe it was I who took the alternative of finding what I sought for, or the signs on the road weren't interpreted in a way I could sign them. Was it I or her that took the alternative?

Chapter One

Love, a picture that was painted in my brain, a canvas so beautiful the word itself underrated it. In my brain it was painted but the thought of it never came. It all started with the search for friendship, someone to play with at a young age. When I was young, I grew up having a friend from kindergarten, he was my best friend, and I believed that it was a friendship which was going to last till eternity. We ended up going to the same primary school together, but after attending there for two years, his family had to move,