Montessori at Home: A Practical Guide for Parents

Part 1

The Parent’s Guide to Montessori

In part 1, you’ll learn the basic tenets of the Montessori method—and why it continues to be such a popular form of interacting with children all around the world. Armed with a greater understanding of the philosophy and instruction style, referred to as pedagogy, you’ll be more equipped to integrate it into your home, and your child’s life, in part 2.

Chapter

1

Montessori 101

Welcome to the world of Montessori. In this chapter, you’ll discover the core concepts of Montessori’s method for providing children with their physical, social, emotional, cognitive, and moral development. This will give you the crucial context needed to make the most of the practical advice throughout the rest of the book.

Why Montessori?

Whether you plan to send your child to a Montessori school or traditional preschool, there are many ways to incorporate Montessori’s concepts into your everyday life. From infancy on, your child is absorbing everything about the world around them through all of their senses. The founder, Maria Montessori called this the absorbent mind. She stressed the importance of preparing the environment that your child is in, being mindful of all that they may absorb, respecting your child, and providing freedom but having limits. By objectively observing your child, you can follow their lead and prepare tweaks to your home that allow them to develop their potential.

A SENSE OF INDEPENDENCE. Montessori allows a child to make choices, learn, and practice how to take care of themselves and their environment, fostering a willingness to explore and an eagerness to pursue learning.

GRACE AND COURTESY. Montessori shows children how to act with and treat one another. Children are encouraged to be sensitive to one another’s feelings, develop empathy, and learn appropriate words to use with other children and adults.

A LOVE OF LEARNING. With the Montessori method, every day is an adventure in the acquisition of knowledge, instilling a love of learning in children from a young age.

CONFIDENCE. Children placed in an environment that enables them to make choices, given materials they are successful with, and surrounded by adults who respect them. It’s only natural for your child to grow more confident from a young age.

HIGH SELF-ESTEEM. A child’s self-esteem begins at birth. It develops and grows through successful social interactions and Montessori is cognizant of these. When you show respect for a child from birth on, their unconscious absorbent mind internalizes it, and the seeds of self-esteem are planted.

AN ABILITY TO RESOLVE CONFLICT. Maria Montessori lived through two world wars and was very cognizant of the need for peace and social justice. The Montessori method asks children to set the guidelines for how they would like to be treated, and to agree that everyone in the classroom will abide by the same rules. When children disagree, they are encouraged to go to a peace table, discuss their differences, and resolve them. In the process, they learn that differences are natural.

A DESIRE TO BE ORGANIZED. The Montessori method facilitates a child’s natural tendency toward order (see here), so they feel good organizing their belongings and being in greater control over their environment. This benefit proves particularly useful at home.

SENSE OF WONDER. Let your child be your guide through their discovery of new experiences, objects, and activities. Share in that wonder: Stop and look at life through the eyes of your child. Ask them lots of questions: Why does the dog wag his tail? Do you think the soap will sink or float in the tub? Why? How are cookies made? The more you facilitate your child’s sense of wonder, the more joy you’ll experience while parenting.

Nobody Solves a Problem Like Maria

Today, there are thousands of Montessori schools around the world, responsible for serving millions of children. None of them would exist, of course, were it not for the incredible ingenuity and determination of Maria Montessori herself.

Born in 1870, Montessori came from the working-class town of Chiaravalle in Italy. Unlike most women around the world, those in Chiaravalle had the opportunity to accrue wealth and power. They formed labor collaborations, resulting in improvements for the workers and their families. Clearly, this made an impression on young Maria.

When Maria was six, her family moved to Rome. At the age of 13, she persuaded her parents to let her attend a predominantly male school; more impressive still, at 20, she enrolled in the University of Rome. While studying to become a doctor, she spent time in the asylums of children deemed mentally ill or developmentally challenged. Her interest in the French physicians Jean Marc Gaspard Itard, known mostly for his work with deaf students, and Edouard Séguin, renowned for his work with the intellectually disabled, led her to focus on how children developed (or did not develop) cognitively, socially, and emotionally.

When Maria was 29, she further upended the norms of the day, giving birth to a son, Mario, out of wedlock. In the face of adversity, she became an outspoken advocate for women’s education and equal pay. She was appointed Director of Rome’s Orthophrenic School, where she trained teachers to work with children deemed mentally ill or developmentally challenged.

In 1907, she was asked to oversee a new preschool for disadvantaged three- to six-year-old children in a low-income area of Rome, called Casa dei Bambini (House of Children). This was where Maria practiced the unique pedagogy her eponymous institutions still embrace today. The school encouraged children to learn through their senses, move at their own pace, freely explore a prepared environment, develop a strong sense of independence, and more. In 1909, she published The Montessori Method, which has been translated into 10 languages.

She went on to open two more Casa dei Bambini schools, eventually expanding her purview to include elementary school–age children. By 1920, Maria was researching adolescents and training teachers—known as guides—to work with the children.

Maria traveled to Argentina, Ireland, Germany, India, Pakistan, Sweden, Sri Lanka and more, to lecture, write, and establish training programs for Montessori schools that opened all around the world. The first Montessori school to open in the United States, in 1911, was located in Scarborough, New York. By 1916, more than 100 Montessori schools had opened in the United States.

Interest in Montessori began to fade by World War I, but Maria soldiered on. In 1929, she and her son established the Association Montessori International. She went on to write numerous books and was nominated for the Nobel Peace Prize in 1949, 1950, and 1951. Maria died in 1952, but her legacy lives on. In the 1950s and 1960s, interest in Montessori schools started to increase again, and by 1960 the American Montessori Society was established. Today there are approximately 5,000 Montessori schools in the United States.

Montessori’s Core Concepts

Montessori’s philosophy is rooted in seven core concepts. These concepts will serve as the foundation for the more specific advice on pedagogy and instruction delivered in part 2.

THE ABSORBENT MIND

The things he sees are not just remembered; they form a part of his soul.

— The Absorbent Mind

Montessori believed that children from birth to age three have an unconscious absorbent mind. They take in a wealth of information about the world through their senses—the first tools a child knows how to use—and formulate foundational ideas about their environment that they will call upon later in life. From age three on, Montessori believed, children have a conscious absorbent mind, at which point they seek out new information more intentionally. An infant unconsciously absorbs the language spoken in their home; a four-year-old consciously wants to be able to learn to read.

Providing opportunities for your child to refine and experience their senses of touch, taste, smell, sight, and sound is paramount during these first few years. Talk to them before they are able to talk; share your passions. They will pick up the excitement in your voice and join you in your hobby. Taking your child with you on nature walks can help pique their curiosity about the natural world. A trip to the art museum can help build a foundation for their appreciation for the arts. Infants and toddlers absorb not only the physical things they see, hear, and touch, but also your enthusiasm.

OBSERVATION

The child’s way of doing things has been for us an inexhaustible fountain of revelations.

— The Absorbent Mind

By observing a child, Montessori could understand the sort of information and experiences they were unconsciously absorbing in their environment, as well as the cause and effect of various factors.

As a parent, you have an incredibly personal relationship with your child. Learning to keep your observations more objective is critical to the development of your child. By stepping back and watching, you’ll be prepared to follow your child’s lead and adjust their environment accordingly.

PREPARED ENVIRONMENT

The first aim of the prepared environment is, as far as it is possible, to render the growing child independent of the adult.

— The Secret of Childhood

Through observation, Montessori realized the extent of a child’s capacity to absorb information about their world and store it in their memory bank. Naturally, she designed an environment for the children that would enhance this capacity. There are three main components of a Montessori environment: the room and furniture arrangement, the materials present, and the adult guides (or parents) who observe the child and guide them toward prepared activities.

The classroom, or in your case, your home, should provide freedom for the child to move around, socialize, and make simple choices. Everything should be in sight and reach of the child. Your home should be clean, orderly, and full of natural materials and plants, making it a healthy, peaceful place to work for both children and adults. (In the next chapter, we’ll go over how to ensure your home incorporates these Montessori traits.)

FREEDOM WITH LIMITS

Little children, from the moment they are weaned, are making their way toward independence.

— The Montessori Reader

Montessori believed children need to have freedom to explore their environment from the time they are born. But with freedom comes some necessary limits. The parent or guide is responsible for preparing the environment—not only for a child’s safety but also to provide the sense of security that comes with boundaries.