LA to Vegas

Captain Dave: [promotional mock preflight safety video] Welcome aboard Jackpot Airlines, service from LA to Vegas, the only airline to ever be on the no-fly list.

Ronnie: Safety is our first priority, and it's our maintenance crew's third priority, which averages out to second priority.

Bernard: Seat belts: you know what to do. Oxygen mask: put yours on first, kids are on their own.

Ronnie: Please keep your shoes on at all times. That's not an FAA thing, but it is for your safety.

Bernard: I will cut you.

Captain Dave: If anyone wants to join the Mile-High Club, it's strictly prohibited.

[whispers]

Captain Dave: Call me.

Ronnie: If he's mouthing "call me," don't.

Captain Dave: Call me.

Ronnie: Now sit back, relax, and enjoy the flight.

Captain Dave: Thank you for flying Jackpot Airlines. Good luck in Las Vegas. May you win big enough to fly home on a better airline.