Une princesse est à bord (1936)
Fred MacMurray: Joe King Mantell
Photos
Quotes
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King Mantell : Your Highness, there's something wrong with your tub.
Princess Olga : Vat?
King Mantell : Yes, you see, the water runs in and it runs out, but the trouble is it runs out faster than it runs in. I discovered it this morning when I was trying to take a bath. It can only draw about that much water
[his fingers show an inch]
King Mantell : and you can't take a bath with that much water
[shows an inch again]
Princess Olga : Vell, if you're a ploomb-er, why don't you fix it?
King Mantell : Well, I'm not a ploomb-er, uh, I mean, a plumber, but I think I could fix it. Have you got a screwdriver?
Lady Gertrude Allwyn : A screwdriver? Her Highness is not in the habit of going around with a screwdriver on her person.
Princess Olga : [to Mantell] Please go avay.
King Mantell : Well, I was only trying to help, but may I suggest that when you want to take a bath, you should take a shower.
[walks away]
King Mantell : Of course, there's always the ocean.
[Exits]
Princess Olga : [dropping her phony Swedish accent] I'd like to smack that guy right in the kisser.
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Princess Olga : Oh, my poof!
[fishing out her sopping wet powder puff]
King Mantell : Your what?
Princess Olga : My powder poof! It is vet!
[squeezing it out onto his shoes]
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Benton : Well boss, do I toss him to the sharks?
King Mantell : What's the matter? Don't you like sharks?
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Cragg : Where did you spend the evening, Mr. Mantell?
King Mantell : Right here.
Lorel : Did you entertain a visitor?
King Mantell : No, nobody was here.
Lorel : You were alone?
King Mantell : Well, practically. I was with Benton.
Benton : Yeah, we were *both* alone.
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King Mantell : Say, did you see that hair? That wasn't grease. That's what you call a royal blonde!
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King Mantell : You ought to know my technique by now. First, flowers. Second, sweet music. Third, a little wine.
Benton : Then I have to find out if there's a husband in town.
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King Mantell : Listen, Darcy, anytime you pat a guy on the back, you've got a knife in your hand.
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King Mantell : I'll take care of Darcy.
Benton : What are you gonna do? Slap the mug on the wrists and ask him for the next dance?
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King Mantell : If you really want to do something for me, fix it so I can get next to the Princess without catching pneumonia.
Benton : Leave it to me. I can handle those dames.
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Benton : King. I just saw Darcy go into the royal suite.
King Mantell : Yeah? Are you sure it was Darcy?
Benton : Sure. Rats like that don't come in pairs.
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King Mantell : If you're ever in any kind of trouble, you can count on me.
Princess Olga : Oh, why do you think I should be in any trouble?
King Mantell : Oh, I dunno. This is a strange ship, and there are some very odd people aboard.
Princess Olga : Ja, and the oddest of them all is you.
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Princess Olga : Well, if you really know who the murderer is, why don't you tell them now?
King Mantell : I would if I knew. The point is I don't.
Princess Olga : Then why did you say you did?
King Mantell : Because to catch a rat you have to have cheese.
Princess Olga : I don't get it.
King Mantell : I'm the cheese. When the rat comes to nibble, bang goes the trap.
Princess Olga : With the cheese in it.
King Mantell : Not if it's a smart piece of cheese.
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Princess Olga : Scram.
King Mantell : What did you say?
Princess Olga : Oh... Scrom. In Sweeden, it means the interview is ended.