- James Gannon: How could you give up a real newspaper job for teaching?
- Erica Stone: Well, that's a very good question, Mr. Gallagher. Maybe for the same reason that occasionally a musician wants to be a conductor, he wants to hear a hundred people play music the way he hears it.
- Erica Stone: Newspapers can't compete in reporting what happened any more, but they can and should tell the public why it happened.
- Dr. Hugo Pine: I can drink any amount of alcohol I like and it doesn't bother me a bit.
- James Gannon: Well it doesn't bither me a bot either!
- James Gannon: [providing an impromptu lesson to Barney] By the way, you heard about it, didn't you?
- Barney Kovac: What?
- James Gannon: Found him dead.
- Barney Kovac: Who?
- James Gannon: Boss.
- Barney Kovac: No kidding. When?
- James Gannon: Two minutes ago.
- Barney Kovac: Where did they find him?
- James Gannon: In his office.
- Barney Kovac: What did happen?
- James Gannon: Some dame shot him.
- James Gannon: Some dame sho... Why?
- James Gannon: Barney, you have just asked me six very important questions: who, what, where, when, how, and why. That's what every news story should answer.
- James Gannon: [referring to Dr. Pine, Prof. Stone's boyfriend] So he's got more degrees than a thermometer, so he speaks seven languages, so he's read every book. So what? The important thing is he's had no experience. He didn't start at the bottom and work up. That's the only way you can learn.
- Peggy DeFore: You're so right, Jim-zee. Take me. Where would I be if I just read books?
- Erica Stone: As my father used to say, a reporter has to do a lot of sweating before he earns the right to perspire.
- Peggy DeFore: Jimsy, what's a psychologist?
- James Gannon: A guy who gives all kinds of advice about things he knows nothing about.
- James Gannon: Morning. Hangover?
- Dr. Hugo Pine: Calling what I have a 'hangover' is like referring to the Johnstown flood as a slight drizzle.
- Dr. Hugo Pine: To me, journalism is, ah, like a hangover. You can read about it for years, but until you've actually experienced it, you have no conception of what it's really like.
- Dr. Hugo Pine: You're confusing education with schooling. Education is the acquisition of knowledge. If you care to look it up, you'll find that the definition of knowledge is "knowing, familiarity gained by experience." You'll also find that wisdom is defined as "the possession of experience and knowledge." Now, being experienced, you therefore have education, you have knowledge, and you have wisdom. You're brilliant... and you make a good martini.
- Gartner: [after being paged to Gannon's desk] Yup?
- James Gannon: Almost forgot: press conference. Got some visiting firemen from Russia. Grab a cameraman, I told them we'd be right over.
- [hands Gartner slip of paper]
- Gartner: Okay.
- [turns to walk away, notices paper is not the intended address, but a flattering sketch of Erica Stone]
- James Gannon: What's the matter?
- Gartner: [chuckling, hands back sketch] Well, that's one way to end the Cold War.
- [Gannon sees his error, snatches sketch back in embarrassment]
- Erica Stone: Look at this. Blood and sex. Journalism is so much more than blood and sex.
- James Gannon: You liked my story about the murder. That's blood, isn't it?
- Erica Stone: Wait a minute, I didn't say I disapprove of blood. It's just that...
- James Gannon: How do you feel about sex?
- Erica Stone: Well, I'm all for it. But some...
- [she suddenly stares at him with a questioning look]
- Dr. Hugo Pine: Nonsense. First she'll go through the typical feminine reaction of indignation, then indifference, then indigestion, then insomnia. Then she'll accept your apologies retroactively.
- James Gannon: I was an obstinate, prejudiced, inconsiderate, coldhearted louse. But at least I was something. Now that I've learned to respect your kind, I'm just a very understanding, remorseful slob. A complete zero.
- James Gannon: I may look like a scholar on the outside but inside I'm still an idiot.
- Dr. Hugo Pine: No!
- James Gannon: An experienced idiot, but I'm still an idiot.
- Erica Stone: Well, Kipling said it quite well in a poem that he wrote: "I keep six honest serving men, they taught me all I knew. Their...
- James Gannon: Their names are: What and why and when and how and where and who.