'Hard Bodies' is a concept I understand why Playboy only ran with once. First it's a fine line between feminine yet attractive and the muscular, masculine. Secondly while the theme naturally rides the gauntlet of sports, working out ...this is the best they could come back with? Toned & fit ladies aren't something to dislike, but the visuals here certainly are for the large part and leave it solely in the losers column.
A silly montage complete with echoing voices, words popping on screen start us off (2 mins). "Jennifer Cogan" is an attractive blonde who likes motorcycles and working out as footage jumps around a bit too much before settling on a mythical warrior theme. That's great, but where's unobstructed shots of Jennifer naked? Zzz (7.5 mins). "The Wrestling Match" keeps the talk, story setup going, but the two women (Casey Gray, Holly Hart) each strip solo. Nice shots of the brunette (Holly) getting out of her bra, panties and the blonde (Casey) puts oil on herself. This is the best part before them in an outdoor wrestling ring with opera music and ... well yeah. Way too artsy (10.5 mins).
"Body in Motion" opens with a blonde (Jennifer?) working out nude in a gym before main lady (Arlene Nicole Rodriguez) in the jungle. Odd choices galore pollute this initially until Arlene is shown in various states of undress in an alley or warehouse (7.5 mins). "The Rock Climb" sees more of the blonde then two ladies (Jacqueline Lovell, Bobbie Marie) briefly rock climb. Upon reaching the top strip, feel each other up. It's your typical tame girl/girl but naked sights come at a constant pace (9 mins). "The Hockey Game" once more the blonde before a lady (Debee Halo) talks about joys of working out. Way too much setup, wasted time (2 mins) but then Debee gets naked in nice fashion. Use of oil, water, many nice closeups made it get better as it went along though I could have done without a red light applied to her body (8.5 mins).
"The Oceanside Workout" starts with the blonde yet again. If this feels like a silly way to keep the theme running than the first shot of lady #1 (Kona Carmack) doing bicep curls in a one-piece bikini on a rock cliff fits right in. She talks as shown rolling around dark sand. Then lady #2 (Ahmo Hight) talks about the joys of working out as shots of them both naked are shown and lady #3 (Christine Lydon M. D.) joins the mix. Christine is very muscular. I lost count of how many times she flexes during this. Shots of them naked come and go in artsy fashion making it less than erotic (10 mins).
A one-off concept video that likely didn't sell very well or turn out all that popular, 'Hard Bodies' shoots itself squarely in the foot. It does a decent job of nailing it's theme, but that means squat to viewers if it doesn't deliver on the necessary nudity that we all came for and plenty of it. Honestly I'm shocked this came out in 1996 from Playboy.
