- [Leonardo, Michaelangelo and Donatello arrive]
- Casey Jones: Friends of yours?
- Raphael: Brothers actually
- Casey Jones: I can see the family resemblance.
- Michaelangelo: I'm the pretty one.
- April O'Neil: I feel like I've gone from happily single to mother of four over night.
- Splinter: Tell me about it.
- Donatello: I was thinking that the Shredder had a bigger hand in our lives than we know. Without the Shredder, we'd all still be pet turtles in a glass jar right now.
- Michaelangelo: [Imitating Gary Coleman] What you talkin' 'bout, Willis?
- Donatello: Well, allow me to explain: As you all may recall, we got mutated by that strange ooze when we were only babies.
- Splinter: I remember it as if it were yesterday. You were all so cute.
- Donatello: The ooze that mutated us came from the TCRI building, right? And, why did the TCRI building even exist? Because the Utroms were trying to build their Transmat so they could go home. And why did the Utroms need to go home?
- Michaelangelo: Because they were late for dinner?
- Donatello: No, because an evil prisoner they were transporting across the galaxy sabotaged their starship, causing them to crash land on Earth centuries ago. And they've been trapped here ever since. And who was this evil prisoner that caused the Utroms so much trouble? He was in fact... Drumroll please.
- [Drumroll]
- Donatello: He was in fact... The Shredder! Ergo, the Shredder had a direct hand in our creation. See what I mean?
- Raphael: I think I speak for everyone when I say, "No".
- Michaelangelo: Ladies and mutants, how NOT to tell our origin story.
- Donatello: Listen, if the Shredder hadn't have made the Utroms crash in the first place, then they never would have developed the ooze, and if they never developed the ooze, we'd never have been mutated. And if we'd never been mutated, we'd all be eating fish flakes in some kid's acquarium right now.
- Michaelangelo: Wow. That's really deep.
- [the power goes out so Splinter lights a candle]
- Donatello: Keep that flame away from Mikey. He just ate a double-chili pizza.
- Michaelangelo: Goodbye, dented manhole cover. Goodbye, home sweet home.
- Raphael: Hello, cruel world. Come on.
- April O'Neil: [Referring to the turtles and Casey] Well, it's definitely a family. But do you think we'll ever be able to teach "the kids" some manners?
- Splinter: Miss O'Neil, teaching them the ancient art of Ninjitsu was hard enough. I'm afraid even I cannot work miracles.
- Leonardo: Can you imagine being that alone?
- Donatello: You know, things may get roughat times, but at least we have each other.
- Michaelangelo: Yeah, but do we have to have Raph?
- Raphael: Come here, knucklehead!
- Raphael: [Splinter has been thrown in the dungeon] I'm gonna go bust him our right now.
- Traximus: Raphael, that is a rash, foolhardy and extremely dangerous act. Count me in.
- Leonardo: We have to keep our wits about us.
- Raphael: Don't worry, Mikey. You can share mine.
- Michaelangelo: [annoyed] Oh, so now I'm witless?
- [theme song]
- Chorus: Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! / Turtles count it off: 1! 2! 3! 4! Turtles! / Mutant chain reaction, turtles! Livin' underground, turtles! / Ninjutsu action, turtles! / It's a shell of a town! Turtles count it off: 1! Live by the code of the martial arts / 2! Never fight unless someone else starts / 3! Always stick together no matter what / 4! If all else fails then it's time to kick butt! / I love bein... I love bein... I love bein' a Turtle! / Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles! / Turtles count it off: 1! 2! 3! 4! Turtles, there's no one better / Turtles, watch out for Shredder! / Turtles, they're like no others / Turtles, those teenage brothers! / 1! 2! 3! 4! 1! 2! 3! 4! / Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles!
- Splinter: How many times have I told you not to sneak up to the surface?
- Michaelangelo: This month?
- Donatello: About 512, Sensai.
- Raphael: Watch out for him, because something that evil always comes back.
- Michaelangelo: Dude, that was great. How do you come up with those?
- Raphael: Don't keep recycling the old ones, Mikey. You gotta try and find something new.
- Splinter: You should never have tried to face The Shredder alone. He is too powerful.
- Donatello: You're telling me. I've got bruises that have got bruises.
- Leonardo: And did you see how The Shredder walked right through that fire?
- Michaelangelo: Yeah, he's like, "The Shredinator" or something.
- Donatello: The elasticity of it's flesh is too resilient.
- Michaelangelo: And it's really rubbery too.
- Hamato Yoshi: He who lives without honor will end without honor.
- Leonardo: And, even if the Shredder is still out there, no matter what he throws at us, no matter how he messes with our lives, nothing he does will change the most important thing: that we are family.
- Michaelangelo: Ha ha ha. Leo, that was off the charts on the Sap-O Meter. You been watching way too many after school specials, bro.
- Raphael: Just eat your S'Mores and keep quiet, Mikey. Leo's got a point.
- Splinter: I hate to put either one of you at risk, but only a fool ignores fate and the strange gifts it offers.
- April O'Neil: Well if it's strange gifts you're after, they don't come any stranger than Casey Jones.
- [Gen, a humanoid rhino, sees a New Yorker dressed like Rocksteady, the mutant rhino from the '80s cartoon]
- Gen: I like your style, my friend.
- Raphael: I'll fill you in over dinner.
- Michaelangelo: Dinner? Now you're talkin' my language.
- Raphael: What language is that Mikey? Nitwit?
- [after entering a damp cavern]
- Donatello: That's some stank.
- Michaelangelo: Don't look at me, my brother. Remember, he who smelt it, dealt it.
- Michaelangelo: [after hearing about the Mousers] Boy, I'd sure hate to be a rat in this city. Oh, sorry Master Splinter.
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