Destroy All Humans! 2 (2006 Video Game)

Robin Atkin Downes: Agent Oranchov, Hippies, Additional Voices

Quotes 

• Ivan Oranchov : I don't get it. We blew that alien spacecraft out of the sky and yet the shriveled geriatric one still survived. These zhopas must be harder to kill than we thought.

  KGB Agent : I spit on them! Ptooey!

  Ivan Oranchov : Nonetheless, inform the Kremlin that we shall proceed with the operation as planned. Tell them we need as much Revelade as they can ship, as quickly as they can ship it.

  KGB Agent : Da, Agent Oranchov.

  Ivan Oranchov : And our American "distributor"?

  KGB Agent : He suspects nothing. In fact he seemed quite enthusiastic about whole idea. He thinks we'll be spreading revolution in a paper cup.

  Ivan Oranchov : And so we will. But not, I think, the sort he expects. Idealists.

  KGB Agent : I spit on them.

  Ivan Oranchov : Stalin, he understood. Ideas may start a revolution, but guns and gulags finish them. Well, no matter. Soon the citizens of Bay City will be embarking on a very bad trip.

  [he laughs evilly while the KGB agent joins in] 

• [first lines] 

  Ivan Oranchov : Premier comrade Milenkov, comrade agents, thank you for coming. Here's what we know so far.

  [a slide show displaying the first game's events and its aftermath is shown] 

  Ivan Oranchov : Ten years ago, the United States government covered up an invasion by an alien race known as Furons. Their primary agent was this Furon: Cryptosporidium-137, dangerous, unpredictable and now deceased.

  Milenkov : So? What is being problem?

  Ivan Oranchov : The problem, comrade, is that Furons can clone themselves and pose convincingly as humans, and they've used these abilities to put Cryptosporidium-138 into the White House!

  KGB Agent : [gasps]  The American people are not noticing?

  [all laugh] 

  Ivan Oranchov : Da, right. Pull the other one. Even worse, this new Crypto clone contains pure Furon DNA harvested from human brains by Orthopox-13, mastermind of the invasion. He also bears a mysterious new mutation referred to only as "the package".

  Milenkov , KGB Agent : Oooh!

  Ivan Oranchov : These aliens pose a dire threat to the Soviet Union, comrades, and so they must be destroyed! As we speak, President Crypto is in Bay City, attending a youth cultural fest, and Orthopox conducting experiments in the Furon mother ship.

• Ivan Oranchov : Savages. Degenerates. There's only one way to deal with such people.

  Orthopox-13 : What in the...

  [the mothership blows up] 

  Ivan Oranchov : Revolution.

• British Hippie : My mind says Richards, but my body says Jagger, baby!

• Crypto : I bet I could tell you that I'm an alien from the Planet Furon, here to harvest your brain stems, and you wouldn't even care...

  British Hippie : Cool! Do it! At least that will take care of my headache.