- Farmer Dave: You remind me of somebody who's about to get fired.
- Uncle Gary: As i said... this is a very special place. Miners discovered things here, magical things. Underneath this ground is the stuff that makes up everything, you know... the real star stuff! Something I learned back in the days when I was talking real fast in Cairo:
- [throws something into a campfire, shapes appear in the flames]
- Uncle Gary: We start by globing the circle, then cubing the globe, and finally: triangulating the cubic globe. Mi mi rama oh niha niha!
- Aladdin: What's it for?
- Uncle Gary: It's the Cave Computer! It's a sacred intelligence that begins and does not begin with everlasting and neverlasting colored chords. In the left corner... that's you. That's me. And at the bottom... that's what's down there.
- Ms. President: We actually don't look at all what we think we do. The lamp is 5-dimensional. In the 5-dimensional view of things, we're all one person, one great person with an invisible string connecting all of our hands. All our hands are actually the same hand.
- Aladdin: Are aliens natural?
- Uncle Gary: Sure! All technology is natural! Look... God = Humans/Nature+Aliens!
- Aladdin: Are aliens natural?
- Uncle Gary: Sure! All technology is natural! Look... God equals humans devided by nature plus aliens!
- Uncle Gary: As I said... this is a very special place. Miners discovered things here, magical things. Underneath this ground is the stuff that makes up everything, you know... the real star stuff! Something I learned back in the days when I was talking real fast in Cairo:
- [throws something into the campfire; shapes appear in the flames]
- Uncle Gary: We start by globing the circle, then cubing the globe, and finally: triangulating the cubic globe. Mi mi rama oh niha niha!
- Aladdin: What's it for?
- Uncle Gary: It's the Cave Computer! It's a sacred intelligence that begins and does not begin with everlasting and neverlasting colored chords. In the left corner... that's you. That's me. And at the bottom... that's what's down there.
- Swedish Roommate: What were you saying before about vaginal theory?
- Aladdin: [Drunk and high, having sex with a different swedish roommate] Vaginal theory. Here it goes: A pussy is a vagina that comes pre-moistened, and as it dries out turns into a vagina again.
- British Druggie Guy: I'm watching that pussy turn into a vagina right before my very own eyes, mate!
- Aladdin: A twat is something a 3-year-old has and a cunt is a mans mouth where a vagina should be.
- Cunt: [From between Swedish Roommate's legs] You stupid cunts, cunts all of you! Hahaha, right mate?
- Swedish Roommate: Well, technically that's just your perception of the pieces.
- Aladdin: I wonder what self-realisation would mean for a guy like me.
- Princess Barbara: It'd propably be pretty ironic. What does 'ironic' mean anymore?
- Aladdin: 'Ironic' is what comes after modern. Everything after modern is ironic. Including all of E-history.
- Genarro Russo: [after obviously getting a blowjob from the princess off-screen] That was the best blowjob I've ever heard!
- Genarro Russo: You all have a disease, and the only thing that will cure it is sucking my dick!... just kidding.