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richardwworkman
Reviews
The Nun II (2023)
More Conjuring universe rubbish.
Some irrelevant and superfluous plot lines float around inside a convent school loaded with formulaic bog standard jump scares which are loosely tied to the first movie.
Is it me or does James Wan not like women very much? Why is the recurring vengeful female a recurring presence in his films?
Expect long dark corridors, loads of negative space, creepy music, creaking doors and that annoying pause that indicates something "scary" is about to happen.
A good horror film for people that don't watch very much horror. I mostly hated it. I liked the magazine rack scene though, that was sort of clever.
Twilight Zone: The Movie (1983)
Should have never been released
Given the circumstances surrounding the deaths of three actors during the filming of this movie, it should have never been released.
To deliberately risk the lives of two young children for the sake of a movies was messed up to say the least. I can't imagine the hell that all the families of the deceased went through. 10 years of court only to watch Landis get away with it.
If you don't know what happened just google Twilight Zone The Movie helicopter deaths. Two people were decapitated in set, Landis knowingly broke the law to get those kids on set.
It's sickening stuff.
How Landis continued to work after that is utterly beyond me.
Wszyscy moi przyjaciele nie zyja (2020)
It's ok. Not great.
There are too many 10 star reviews for this film. Not the worst film of the year but by no means as good as some are saying.
Basically everyone dies at a party, we then have to wait until the end to find out how this happened.
Along the way there are a few jokes, some bits of sex and crazy antics.
If you're looking for a fun romp with loads of sex and violence then this is the movie for you.
I didn't hate it, it's just a bit predictable with a few jokes thrown in.
I can only assume the 10 star reviews are from people trying to boost this movie for personal reasons, because it's no way near as good as they are saying.
Morbius (2022)
Another marvel cultural atrocity
Marvel keep producing this crap. It's never going to go away because people just watch marvel crap because it's marvel.
Atrocious acting, Matt Smith doing that English accent that Americans think English accents sound like made me physically sick. And who the hell keeps giving Jared Leto work? He's hilariously bad.
The script is dreadful, the special effects are shocking, and to top it off, they had the nerve to suggest at the end there might be a sequel. Which of course there will be because the marvel audience are so desensitised to any level of quality that they probably thought the Michael Keaton cameo was insightful.
So bad it's not even funny.
Attack of the Lederhosen Zombies (2016)
Like Shaun of the Dead
.. but not very good.
If you liked Zombeevers this is a little bit below that on the quality scale.
Also there weren't enough Lederhosen Zombies so in this regard the film was disappointing.
La morte vivante (1982)
Marginally better than most of Rollin's films
But only just.
Rollin maintains his poor production values to a barely competent level. The actors look like they know this film is going to be crap so clearly aren't bothered.
At least in this film Rollin refrains from his usual old man sexual perversion fantasies.
Tone-Deaf (2019)
Rubbish
Some sort of generational war thing. Old man hates millennials but likes to kill people for no reason.
Young lady likes cities and hates stuff. Mum is a child of the sixties. Once you get past that there's nothing else to this film.
Gräns (2018)
Profound and more than a bit disturbing
This is a film that defies typical genre definitions. There are elements to this that reminded of Lars Von Trier or David Lynch's movies in so much as they remind the viewer that cinema is participation in an event not just passively observation.
There are certainly some moments that are difficult to watch, the baby in the box and the woodland sex scene for example.
Without giving any of the plot away this is a film that incorporates ideas of loneliness, isolation as well as cultural and social genocide. These concepts sit at different ends of a broad spectrum of existential themes running through the storyline.
If nothing else, this film will have you thinking about it for a few days at least.
The Forever Purge (2021)
Utter crap
I watched this as I remembered a review that was quite favourable. I have to admit I've never watched any of the purge films so was looking forward to this.
It's rubbish. Some ultimate red neck murder porn. No doubt some right wing revolutionary fantasists will love this sort of thing but that's about as far as this poor excuse for a film will appeal.
The Manor (2021)
Half decent
Treads a very well work path of demonic witchcraft that has much in common with the folklore centric British horror of the late 60s or early 70s.
While there's nothing particularly original about this film, it's still a decent and entertaining watch.
The Boy Behind the Door (2020)
Profoundly average
Don't let the decent score fool you. Takes about 50 minutes for anything to actually happen.
Literally and shamelessly lifts the axe chopping through the door scene directly from The Shining.
There's something about boys being kidnapped? I dunno, I lost interest.
Just a ridiculously dull film.
French Exit (2020)
Dull people do dull things.
If you're wondering if rich people love exciting and interesting lives that are better than yours, then this should put your mind at ease.
This is a story of very dull people living a listless ordinary existence.
It took a lot of effort to watch this.
The Night House (2020)
Good ghost story
Reminded me of what lies beneath and the recent Invisible Man.
I liked the way it explored the supernatural without copping out at the end.
Some nice uncanny moments. An enjoyable flick.
Malignant (2021)
Another mess of a film from Wan
I just don't like Wan's films. They are usually like a load of Scooby Doo episodes mashed together in a barely comprehensible clichéd visual mess and this is no exception.
Lots of whippy camera shots of stuff that's supposed to be scary in a big spooky house.
Dull and unimaginative as per usual.
Shookum Hills (2021)
Not very good
This could have been a half decent B movie. It has all the ingredients, undiscovered monsters, suspicious locals, misguided and arrogant expedition leader.. it's all very familiar: and there's the problem.
Unless you haven't seen films like creature from the black lagoon, Alien or The Descent, you won't find anything original here. Bits of scripts just put together from a load of other films.
At least the monster is clearly a man in a suit which is a nice traditional touch.
Be Kind Rewind (2008)
A Charming tribute to the art..
..of American cinema.
A lovely little film that is a celebration of cinema.
Yeah so it's a little bit hokey and a reminder that Jack Black is as 2 dimensional as Mickey Mouse, but we sometimes forget the cultural contribution of American film making over the past 120 years.
A feel good movie that's not quite Cinema Paradiso, but is rooted in a community which now no longer exists: the video store.
No One Gets Out Alive (2021)
Worth watching for..
..one of the more original and terrifying monsters in contemporary horror.
Stats off well but gently slips into one of those missing person conspiracy things.
But what could have ended up being a relentlessly formulaic slog, takes an unexpected and surprising turn that dips into folklore and mythology.
Anna and the Apocalypse (2017)
An absolute atrocity
I lasted 7 minutes and 35 seconds which is when the first song started.
Even before the song starts it's barely watchable. The cheesy kitch title sequence sets the tone, the acting is piss poor and then there's that bloke who used to do the Halifax advert in the UK.
I hate musicals.
Paycheck (2003)
Possibly..
..one of the most ridiculous films ever made.
The 2002 vision of what the future might be like is quaint.
Other than that it's not really worth watching.
Till Death (2021)
Started out as another Gerald's Game..
..but develops Into a decent home invasion thriller.
Yes, I've seen all this before so I spent the first 40 minutes waiting for something original to happen.
While I was left waiting, the story continues along a revenge style survival flick.
Nothing new here but it's entertaining nonetheless.
There's Someone Inside Your House (2021)
Boring people get killed..
..in exciting innovative murders.
So there's a mass murderer on the loose killing seniors who are all individually incredibly dull and probably wouldn't be missed anyway.
The utter meaninglessness of this film is irritating in itself if it were not for the painfully forced social commentary.
I couldn't have cared less about any of the victims who inevitably get picked off by some one.
The one thing I liked about it was the 3D printed mask idea. Brilliant, it's just a shame that it was wasted on this pile of crap.
The Other Side of the Door (2016)
Half decent..
..spiritual supernatural horror.
Set in India this uses a mix of Hindu and folklore as a family struggle with the death of their child.
It's a good watch with some creepy moments but being based on such a deep family tragedy kind of weighs the story down a bit. There was room to explore the spirituality associated with the death gods but if just kind of stuck with the family thing which was a bit of a shame.
A good popcorn movie. Watchable but not a classic.
The Field Guide to Evil (2018)
Should have been good..
..but it isn't.
While well intentioned the collection missed its target.
We need more folklore in cinema but the tales were undone by some ropey direction, crap make up and some dodgy acting.
The frustrating thing is that some of the stories had some unsettling and disquieting moments, but these were offset by the absurdity of others.
Cold Skin (2017)
Ponderous and dull.
The mermaid myths of lore are closer to the spiteful and vindictive Merpeople in Harry Potter's black lake than any Disney little mermaid trash.
There seems to have been a load of movies about men being stuck on an island lighthouse together. So what we have here is some kind of bizarre Lighthouse mermaid crossover.
The monsters are, of course, not the creatures attacking but the humans. And that's about as deep as it gets.
The sea creatures attack, they get shot, then they attack again, then they get shot again, and so it goes on.
It's all a bit repetitive and quite frankly rather dull.
Nightworld (2017)
Not great
I suppose they got a trip to Sofia to make a a film out of this. Why it's set in Bulgeria is Never explained, it's a bit random.
Dreadful script that drags on and on, some flashing lights, a big dark room, blah, blah, blah.