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Attack of the Giant Leeches (1959)
It's a Corman!
This is one of Corman's worst. It's hard to believe that a great professional like Leo Gordon wrote this. If the Cormans butchered his script, he should have taken his name off of it.
There is eye candy in it for both males and females. The leading ladies are pleasant to look at, and it seemed that Jan Shepard truly enjoyed planting her chest against Ken Clark's bare, hairy wall.
Tombstone Territory: The Tin Gunman (1958)
Interesting Episode
This is an unusual story for actor Hal Smith in that he does not portray a drunk. This episode was interesting to me because I saw the feature in "Stan Lee's Superhumans" about a man who can draw a pistol and accurately shoot so fast that his two shots sound as one. In "The Tin Gunman," a showman is billed as "The Fastest Gun in the World"; not the West or the United States, but the world. The story gives no indication that he ever travelled abroad to validate this claim, nor does he shoot anywhere near as fast as the Superhuman. Actually, he doesn't seem to be any faster than Sheriff Hollister. In The Town Too Tough to Die, that billing is fightin' words, and the plot is pretty much predictable. One thing that seemed to be inconsistent is that Sheriff Hollister fines Johnny $10 for shooting his gun inside town limits, but Billy Denver practices in his hotel room very noisily without consequence. A highlight of this episode is the beautiful Lisa Gaye in her showgirl costume.
Route 66: Sheba (1961)
The First Episode
I've been watching the first season of Route 66 on DVD, and this is the first episode I could not endure to the end, because it is so boring. I suspect I neared the 30-minute mark when I shut it down. It is mainly about a beautiful, whiney alcoholic who was being harassed by Lee Marvin. Plot development is glacier slow, beyond my patience.
Star Trek: Metamorphosis (1967)
C'mon, guys
Yet another plot-hole-riddled story. I don't understand why the writers don't think these things through. 1) How can The Companion make the shuttle craft operational again after burning all of those circuits when she attacked Spock? Can she fix electrical modules and printed circuit boards down to the component and printed-trace level? 2) She states she could not save the life of Hedford, but then after "merging" with her, the Hedford body is perfectly healthy. 3) How is Kirk going to explain the disappearance of Hedford? "Oh, she died and we jettisoned her body into space according to her wishes." Would a star ship captain file a false report? "Metamorphosis" would have been much better if these things were addressed.
One Step Beyond: Person Unknown (1961)
This Review is for "Person Unknown"
I chose this title because I referenced another in my text, and the computer put it under that one. I had to give this only five stars, because the over-acting of David J. Stewart had me cringing. Oh, the histrionics! John Newland admitted at the end of the program that it was a dramatization. Wow, was it! About dramatization: with One Step Beyond you're really not sure of the truthfulness of this stories. For example, in "Where Are They," there really was a rocks-from-the sky episode in Chico, CA according to some accounts, while others say it was a hoax. Did the writers make up stories based on popular hoaxes or on strange incidents that happened somewhere in the world? As Mr. Newland is no longer with us, we'll probably never know.
The Magdalene Sisters (2002)
What did she say?
I suppose watching this film in a theater is much more enjoyable than on television or videotape. I viewed it twice on the latter two mediums and I could not understand a significant portion of the dialog because it was whispered or mumbled in a thick Irish brogue. I suppose in the theater one could tell that Crispina was being sexually abused by the priest, but I couldn't tell who it was or even if the priest was the other party. Other than the audio/visual problem, I appreciate the exposure of this dreadful practice and was staggered that it didn't end until the mid-1990s. I also admire the bravery of the actresses to film the shower scene.
Star Trek: I, Mudd (1967)
The Plot Hole Episode
"Star Trek" suffered from a budget that was too low for its genre, which, I assume, is the main reason for the poor writing that was heavily contaminated with plot holes, continuity errors, and pseudo science among other things. What made the series survive three seasons was that it was unique.
As others have written, one must throw out one's sense of logic to enjoy this comedic episode. A few examples: Who built the first androids and what happened to them? How did Norman leave the planet? There was no mention of any other spacecraft. If there had been, Mudd would have lobbied to "borrow" it for his own escape. How did Norman appear out of nowhere and become assigned to a Federation star ship? While Kirk is trying to fry the androids' brains with logic, Norman states that he could not harm the humans he serves, but on the Enterprise he did considerable harm to his future "lords." As sophisticated as the androids seemed to be, they should not have been upset by the crew's charades and logic games but simply dismissed them.
Brigham Young (1940)
Great sets and special effects
Fictionalized account of some of the history of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. This is typical of "historical" films of the 1940s. Many of the Westerns made during this decade are as laughable as some of the nonfactual anti-Mormon rants posted here pretending to be reviews of "Brigham Young."
As a Western history buff, I am dismayed at the historical inaccuracies of this film, but I am impressed by the effort to manage all of the people, wagons, and animals sloshing through mud and rivers. The sets and special effects are commendable.
Too bad Scott Forbes of television's "The Adventures of Jim Bowie" was not old enough to portray Joseph Smith, for he resembles him more than any other actor I've seen.
Mystery Science Theater 3000 (2017)
Mr. Nelson, You're Needed
I don't know the reason Mike is not part of this. The show is not as bad as I expected from what I read/saw of the pre-production publicity. I chuckle occasionally during these new episodes, but I laughed out loud during the old ones. Felicia Day is cute, even with her overbite. Surprisingly, I didn't hear any anti-Republican comments in this season, maybe because the old lefty Kevin Murphy isn't contributing, but I know others, like Patton Oswalt, also are lefties. I expected that with Trump in the White House, the cast would go rabid. I agree with other reviewers that there is too much talking and singing. I hope they read IMDb, so maybe they will tone it down in Season 2.
The American West (2016)
The American West Fantasy
I came across this dreck on SBS in Australia, and I stopped watching halfway through the first episode because of its historical fantasies. Like other reviewers, I'm staggered by what Redford's motivation was. Is he really that ignorant or does he enjoy portraying history the way he wants it to have occurred? I sincerely hope the Aussies don't believe this is the way the American West was.
Starcrash (1978)
Mama Mia! Santa Lucia!
At first I thought this screenplay was written by third graders for a class project, and then on IMDb I saw it is Italian. How could a country that produced Galileo, Michelangelo, and DaVinci turn out this dreck? The only redeeming entity in it for males is Caroline Munro portraying Stella Star. Not that I'm complaining, but in scenes where other characters are fully dressed, she wears some sort of bikini apparently without feeling any embarrassment at all. One is hard pressed to describe the plot, because there really isn't any in the formal sense of the word. As I wrote, it seems to have been concocted by third graders who tried to extrapolate on some scientific principle they saw in a Saturday-morning cartoon. Or maybe, being written in Italian, it was "translated" by someone having only a phrase-book knowledge of the language.
Armchair Theatre: The Hothouse (1964)
Thanks to "A sparkling quartet"
for explaining the plot of this pot. It was about half over before I could discern any plot at all because of the thick British accents, rapid-fire speaking, and seemingly mindless prattle. It seemed like the writer was being paid by the word, which is a credit to the actors for being able to memorize all of that dribble. It became interesting--aside from watching the delicious young Diana Rigg in her mid 20s--only near the end when gorgeous Miranda Connell appears to try to seduce Harry Corbett. I saw it as a special feature in The Avengers DVD set #4. One more highlight: the scene where Corbett gets to carry Diana in a front-to-front dance. Now there was a lucky actor!
Star Trek: The Devil in the Dark (1967)
One of the silliest episodes
While the theme is interesting, the whole story is one big plot hole. 1) The Horta can move through rock as easily as men move through air. Where is the residue, the gasses, the excess pushed-out molten rock? Why are the tunnels not in the shape of the creature but circular and almost the height of a man? 2) The Horta has killed 50 miners. Obviously their defensive weapons are useless. So what do they do? They post a single guard. 3) How could a creature shaped like the Horta—no arms, hands, and fingers—extract the critical component from the nuclear reactor with mechanical precision? 4) In other episodes, communicators and transporter beams would not transmit through solid rock, but in this episode it is no problem at all. 5) All of the people killed by the Horta—even a trained Star Fleet security officer—freeze in fright when they see the creature instead of firing their phasers. Kirk and Spock, of course, do not freeze.
Dunkirk (2017)
Dunkirk for Millennials
In screen writing, a shot is an image captured by the camera. A scene is a meaningful dramatic movement within the story. A sequence is a collection of scenes with a unified dramatic purpose, usually between 10 to 20 minutes long. Millennials like their shots and scenes fast like the commercials that show images for a couple hundred milliseconds maximum, and Christopher Nolan made this movie just for them. There is no classic character or story development; it seems to be just a collection of quick scenes cut and mingled from what should be different sequences. I doubt there is a proper sequence in it. Nolan described it as "his most experimental film," and that truly is what this movie is, but I give it a 7 for technical work.
The Stalking Moon (1968)
Slow, Nonsensical
This script is as exciting as watching paint dry. I'm glad I didn't sit through it in a movie theater in '68. It's as slow as a story can be. Then there is the illogic. I reckon they are called plot holes. The characters don't behave as one would expect. For example, why would Salvaje stalk the party alone and not bring his braves?
The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford (2007)
Did I begin a movie?
So I put the DVD in the player and sit back to enjoy a good Western, but what happens? After a brief narration, there is at least five minutes of a bunch of actors in period dress talking 'bout fornicating with women, interspersed with Affleck mumbling to Shepherd. I'm thinking, has this movie officially started or did the director film some sort of rehearsal and accidentally put it into the finished product? Throw out any teaching of plot creation or advancement in this film. At about the five minute mark of this nonsense, I ejected the DVD.
Groundhog Day (1993)
Mamma Mia!
I read accolade after accolade about this movie, and 14 years after its release I finally watched it on DVD. I was BORED to drowsiness! While the premise is interesting, I can't conceive how it could fill a two-hour movie. I sat thinking "Please end. Please end!" But it kept going on and on and on. It brought to mind the Twilight Zone episode "Stop Over in a Quiet Town." Why didn't Phil try to leave town before the blizzard arrived? Why didn't he not set his alarm clock?
The Avengers (1961)
The Avengers—Brought to You By the British Liquor Industry
Did anyone care if the show had severe failings?
"...made them ever so slightly ludicrous - because we thought that life was ludicrous anyway, which it is! To stay alive and all, you have to be slightly mad - but you also had to be basically cool. We used that, we tilted it a bit, we made it funny and the show worked." – Patrick Macnee
It had farcical, formulaic stories. Examples: -- someone arranges to meet Steed or Emma somewhere and then gets killed just before the latter arrives; -- the time-filling banter with an eccentric Englishman (pardon my redundancy); -- very rarely are doors locked. Steed and Emma simply open them and walk in no matter what the facility is; -- Emma often gets tied up so old English gentlemen can have their private fantasies; -- no one ever kills Steed or Emma when they have opportunity and motive--they simply secure them or knock them out; -- a minor character shown in the beginning often is the chief villain; –- obvious back-screen projection and stunt doubles; –- villains are rendered unconscious with the slightest of falls, hitting some object, or being lightly struck; –-reused sets, locations, props, and actors (such as Jack Watson); –- amateur special effects and some props (a revolver with a silencer?!).
Someone wrote that "Honey West" was canceled because there wasn't room or budget for both of these shows to be on the air, and The Avengers won, but Honey West tried to take itself seriously, whereas The Avengers didn't, so it's too bad they didn't keep both, for Anne Francis and Diana Rigg were the only reasons for males to watch either show. The best episodes for seeing the most Rigg flesh are "The Girl from Auntie," "A Touch of Brimstone," and "Honey for the Prince."
So did anyone care if the show had severe failings? No, because it had Diana Rigg.
The Twilight Zone (1959)
Changing Opinion Over Time
I enjoyed The Twilight Zone immensely when I was a kid, but seeing it as an adult, I was staggered by the lack of scientific and historical knowledge of the writers and dismayed by enough plot holes to drive a herd of buffaloes through. Here are some examples:
An astronaut goes nuts just for being kept in a capsule for a few days.
Asteroids are miniature earths.
A space explorer crash-lands on a planet 4.3 light years from his origin, but he communicates in real time to his mission control.
An old geezer goes nuts over a slot machine, and the casino workers just stand there watching until he pushes it over. Try that in a casino.
The writer(s) are clueless as to when the U.S. entered WWI.
Mannequins come to life for a month and live among real people. Where do they live? How do they get money? How did Marsha come to know she has a mother to buy a gift for?
A young woman allegedly has serious surgery on her face, but when her head is unwrapped, there is not a sign of it.
A man can stop time all over the earth with a stopwatch, yet he can move objects. Why don't aircraft fall from the sky? Does he stop Earth in its rotation and orbit? How about the entire solar system?
Enough. One Step Beyond I believe was a better show. If one accepts the paranormal aspect, it is far more believable and better written.
Joan of Arc (2015)
A Very Good Documentary
As everyone knows the story of Joan of Arc, I hope my review won't get me blacklisted for failing to note spoilers.
While light on the squabbles among the Burgundians, the English, and supporters of Charles VII, and on the myriad events and battles in Joan's life, this program captures the spiritual quest of Joan of Arc to have Charles crowned at Reims. She is superbly played by Milly Thomas, who physically is a splendid match for the title character. Viewers feel an increasing sense of doom for poor Joan as she is betrayed by her own countrymen for political purposes. The program adequately describes the farcical trial by pro-English clergy who had no authority to try her, as the trial was a machination of English secular authorities. Desperate for a conviction, the clergy violated every rule of an ecclesiastical trial and used outright fraud, which culminated in her martyrdom at Rouen.
The Great Waltz (1938)
A Tribute to the Music, Not the Man
This picture is mainly a showcase for the magnificent singing and trilling abilities of Gorgeous Korjus, although I wish she would have done more singing than trilling. That mischievous grin she often has during the film is captivating.
The opening credits imply that the only three real characters in the film are Strauss, his mother, and Franz Josef (maybe Dommayer). They were merely used to develop this fictitious story about Strauss. There are a few tidbits of truth in it. Strauss Senior did want his son to be a banker, and there was a Dommayer establishment and an Austrian revolution in 1848.
Strauss was married three times, but only one ended in divorce, so if he was a rake, he didn't marry and dump.
I was disappointed that the wonderful tenor voice of George Houston (Fritz Schiller) was not used more in the film, and it is sad that his career did not advance more successfully before he passed away much too early.
The Ghost Train (1941)
Vaudevillian Prattle
I was looking forward to a good old English ghost mystery, but this film is mostly like the title of my review. I was getting really close to switching it off, but the thought kept recurring that the English MUST have a good ghost story waiting to unfold.
I was wrong. Most of this movie is vaudevillian prattle. The beginning has no plot development, just pointless comedic yakking. Arthur Askey's character Tommy Gander is even more annoying than Kevin Corcoran's Arliss Coates in "Old Yeller." I was so hoping he would die early.
The "rule" is, if this is a ghost story, you had better scare the audience somehow within ten minutes, but this film doesn't become even mildly interesting until the stationmaster tells the ghost story. The highlights of this picture are the beautiful Linden Travers and the wonderful Kathleen Harrison, who would endear herself to American audiences as Mrs. Dilber in the 1951 movie "Scrooge."
The Independents (2013)
A splendid alternative
to those two Irishmen on Fox. Like Mary Katherine Ham, Lisa Kennedy Montgomery is a delight to watch and listen to. It's refreshing to see an independent review of politics since objective journalism died in 2008 when all of the major media moguls except Peter Rice jumped into the tank for the Democrats. Not trying to hide their bias, CBS released Sharyl Attkisson for being not being supportive of the Obama Administration. The Independents would be a good place for Sharyl.
The talking heads on this show are intelligent and articulate. Democrats aren't worshiped and Republicans aren't spared criticism. The show delves into issues the Democrats would like you to erase from memory, like Benghazi, Fast & Furious, IRS, and, of course, Obamacare.
The Twilight Zone: Stopover in a Quiet Town (1964)
Another one that doesn't fly
While I would love to be marooned with drop-dead-gorgeous Nancy Malone, this episode is another TWZ story that makes it too hard to suspend belief. I got over my jealousy that Barry Nelson is 18 years older than his hot wife and can accept that. But did the couple ever look up to see there was no sun, blue sky, or clouds? A girl that large would not have a high-pitched laugh. The acoustical physics among the couple, the church bell, the train, and the girl are all mixed up. After encountering prop after prop, the couple really would believe the train would actually take them out of town? Did they not think to run to the engine to see if there was an engine crew? I give it a 7 only because of Nancy.
Sagebrush Trail (1933)
Western Shlock, alright
I reckon audiences in the early 1930s were expected to suspend belief completely when they watched these pictures.
Wayne pulls a reed out of the mud as if were a prop. The Law shoots into the water, and because the reed floats away, they assume they gottem, but don't care that no body floats to the surface, and skeedaddle as fast as they can. From the animal's rump, Wayne jumps on horses that should have been tied to the hitchin' post and gallops away without untying it. The Law waits in ambush for Jones and Wayne to enter the store, but fires before Wayne fully opens the door, wounding him in the shoulder, which miraculously heals in a coupla' days. They dutifully wait in the store until the two can escape before they give chase, and, of course, Jones and the wounded Wayne are much faster than the lawmen. Wayne camouflages himself and waits for a stagecoach to run over him, not caring at all if the horses step on him or a wheel squashes him. When Jones and Wayne are behind the wagon being hosed by the continuous fire of the robbers, no bullets at all hit the wagon, allowing the two to have a quiet chat.
I could go on, but that should prove my point.