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The Persuaders!: The Man in the Middle (1971)
Miseducating Archie
An even more fun and likeable than usual episode of "The Persuadors", given that it's very much centred on the appearance of the moustachioed, gap-toothed English comic actor Terry Thomas who guest-stars as Brett's penniless, fly-by-night third cousin. Cousin Archie promptly gets in the way when Brett's assigned mission to collect a top-secret microfilm sees him caught between a rock and a hard place with both British Intelligence and Russian secret agents after him for impersonating a spy at a rendezvous pre-arranged by the judge which naturally goes awry.
Of course we've already seen Archie accidentally meet the real spy, a Mr Price by name and even introduces him to Brett and Danny at the hotel where they're staying..Succeeding events see Brett survive being caught in the crossfire of both sets of spies, end up in the arms of a voluptuous lady diplomat in the British Embassy in Italy only to be tracked down and put in peril again as he's sent out again by the judge to save the Magoffin of the secret formula which both sides want.
On the other side is a pretty, gun-carrying young British agent played by Suzy Kendall. Half way through the episode it seems that Danny and Archie have tied everything up by rescuing Brett but when the dratted Ruskies kidnap Suzy, they demand an exchange with Price but as they don't know what he looks like, it becomes obvious who will play the part of the less than willing dupe to help engineer Kendall's escape and save the day.
It probably helps if you like Thomas's cowardly caddish-cadger persona built up in many a British film of the 50's and 60's and to be truthful he probably won me over despite myself in the end. Moore and Curtis gently and graciously give way to the roaring old boy in more ways than one in another amiable episode of this ever-entertaining light adventure series.
Heavenly Pursuits (1986)
Is Vic There
I was pleased to track down this lesser-known Film 4 production from the mid-80's, set in my native Glasgow. It's very much post-Bill Forsyth with its everyday locations and quirky characters even if it posits at its heart the old religious faith v atheistic scepticism argument although as you'd expect, it doesn't do so in a deadly serious way.
Events centre around a Catholic school in Glasgow for struggling girls and boys, the Blessed Edith Semple School, which is trying to claim sainthood for its namesake and founder for publicity and no doubt fund-raising purposes. To do this there must be three verifiable miracles which can be accredited to her influence and they're off to a flying, or should that be walking start, when one of their crippled young students gets up and does just that. So the search for numbers two and three is definitely afoot, although Tom Conti's teacherly cynic-in-residence character, Vic Matthews, doesn't believe any of it. He has his own problems anyway as he's just discovered he's suffering from an incurable brain tumour.
An intuitive and sympathetic teacher, he takes his class with a mixture of humour and empathy but can't get through to one young boy in particular who's perennially at the bottom of the class and seems uncommunicative, even to him, Ewan Bremner in his debut role as Stevie Deans. So he makes it his personal mission to try help the youngster out, especially as the school's rather severe headmaster, David Anderson, wants to pack Stevie off to a special school.
Also into Vic's orbit comes the pretty new female music teacher, Ruth Chancellor, a young Helen Mirren whom he initially awkwardly tries to woo. Then strange things start happening to him, he runs a bazillion red lights unscathed n his car to prove a point to his passenger Ruth and his stereo plays without being plugged-in culminating in an incredible physical feat of his, when he makes like Spiderman to try to talk down another youngster who's got up on the school roof in an attention seeking manoeuvre of their own. Naturally, it's not long before this story flies with the media with Vic as the reluctant focal point. But the biggest unexplained occurrence is just around the corner...
As I expected, the humour here is gentle and warm. The film doesn't try to lead the viewer to any favoured conclusions leaving the subject of whether or not to believe, down to the audience themselves. Anyway, Vic's much more interested in the welfare of his pupils as well as his stop-start courting of the initially resistant Ruth, than whether the school gets recognition from the Vatican.
It has to to be said that the acting of the child actors is occasionally rather amateurish and it's also blessed, (no pun intended) with an especially dated pop-synthesiser soundtrack which made me wince with every blast of it. Conti is highly personable as Matthews and is nicely supported by Mirren, Anderson and a young David Hayman as another of his teacher colleagues. It goes without seeing that it was highly pleasurable for me to identify in the location shots, familiar parts of my city as it was when I was younger.
I felt the film could have perhaps benefited with a little more humour and drama, but nevertheless it was a pleasant watch and definitely worth looking up on my part.
Disturbia (2007)
New Light Through an old Window
"Rear Window" for teens. Not ordinarily the type of movie I'd watch but having recently watched a different Hitchcock remake, this came up as a recommendation in a similar vein, although I first had to get myself get over its awful title.
The pitch is roughly the same, with the clever twist that the troublesome teenager here, Shia LeBouf's character, is restricted to his room (okay and to his garden too) not by a broken leg as James Stewart was, but by an electronic tag around his ankle which he git after punching out one of his teachers. For about an hour, you have to sit through the movie's teen sex-comedy tilt at its target audience as LeBouf and his Chinese-American chum get their kicks spying on his neighbours, in particular the bikinied young female who's just entered the neighbourhood. I could have happily missed out all the goofiness not to mention the casual voyeurism but things do pick up when the big bad serial-murderer comes into his view.
Aided by a pounding soundtrack, the film builds to a decent climax as LeBouf, his mate and especially his new girlfriend-next-door combine to save his own mom, yes, seriously and of course take down David Morse's nightmare of a neighbour.
Although the film can't escape it's widely over-contrived plot jumps, making allowances for my widely out-of-synch personal demographic, it's not that bad a thriller and if it also managed turn a few youngsters onto the real deal of one of the Master's very best features, even later in life, then I'm happy enough that this exists.
The Man Who Could Cheat Death (1959)
Who Wants to Live Forever
A lesser-known Hammer Studios movie which is less a horror movie than a psychological thriller. The story itself borrows bits of "The Picture of Dorian Gray", "The Strange Case of Dr Jekyll and Mr Hyde" and even the Dracula legend in a complicated narrative which stars Anton Diffring as a Victorian-era young-ish scientist who appears to have discovered the secret of eternal life. Now actually 104 years old, and looking great on it, the only thing is that the process seems to require ten year boosts from the glands of deceased young women who the distinguished doctor appears to meet through his sideline practice as a sculptor.
His accomplice down the years has been Arnold Marlé's now elderly fellow-scientist who started out younger than Diffring but now has literally one hand in the grave as a recent series of strokes has rendered him incapable of performing the required operation to prolong Diffring's already long life. With Diffring only surviving week to week by imbibing a suitably hubbling and bubbling secret potion, he's desperate to have another regeneration but with Marlé physically incapable of the task and also now becoming suspicious at the regular ten-year disappearances of young women, the prof will need someone else to act as his stand-in surgeon to get the job done. Which is where Christopher Lee's straight-arrow young doctor comes in, who finds the whole idea firstly unbelievable and then morally reprehensible but unfortunately his pretty young girlfriend Hazel Court is a still starry-eyed old flame of Diffring's who nevertheless isn't afraid to use her as a hostage to encourage Lee's participation.
But even after the operation, the now revitalised Diffring wants more, in short, he wants Court as his mate resulting in a rescue-come-showdown which literally puts years on the dastardly scientist.
I found the narrative and plot-points a little confusing with a number of situations seemingly flung at the viewer out of nowhere, usually accompanied by a heap of often expository dialogue which rather loftily included discussions on the God complex, eternal life and the world's over-population which I didn't know iwas such a hot topic so long ago as this. I also wasn't convinced by Diffring as a lady-killer in both senses of the phrase in what was overall a rather static and set-bound piece. Still, the acting of Lee, Court, Marlé and Francis De Wolff as the 'tec on the old boy's trail was some compensation and there was a convincing transformation scene at the end too.
Perhaps this particular Hammer lacked a little force but it still nailed down my attention well enough for its eighty odd minute running time.
The Persuaders!: The Long Goodbye (1971)
Oil Be Back
This was definitely one of the best episodes of "The Persuaders" I've yet seen as I rewatch the entire series, the first time I've looked in on it since I was a boy of 10 or 11 when it first hit the TV screens.
This episode, directed by Roger Moore himself, who cleverly contrives a small part for his own young daughter, combined elements of cold war tension, big business extortion and a topical, environmentally friendly message around a scientific formula which could eliminate the need for oil going forward.
The long dead remains of an eminent scientist are accidentally discovered on purpose deep in the heart of Scotland by Danny and Brett on a tip off from the judge. In the late man's possession is his own revolutionary calculation which could be worth millions in the open market and soon attracts the interest of a number of different parties. The deceased's will puts his daughter Carla in possession of the system and it's not long before three pretty young women come forward all claiming to be her.
In the meantime Danny is kidnapped but keeps his wits sufficiently about him, while he is being driven to the captive house, to remember the various landmarks and sound effects en-route which will enable him to retrace his journey later on and so set up the finale. This is when Brett, naturally, comes to the rescue in a wonderfully of-its-time bubble-car promoting a new soap brand where he's previously schmoozed way past the resistance pretty young sales-girl driving the car in time-honoured James Bond style, to then race to the rescue leaving the real Carla to make a noble decision which she believes is best for the planet although we could definitely do with that formula now given how the world has turned against fossil fuels.
With lots of shots of vintage cars in real London locations adding period charm, not to mention Danny's ridiculous outfit of the day which seemed to comprise a lady's low-cut collarless blouse with an extravagant cravat-tie around his neck, all adding to the fun, bar some ugly process shots used for the various car journeys employed, I really enjoyed this episode.
A Perfect Murder (1998)
An Imperfect Movie
This slick, stylised 90's remake of Hitchcock's "Dial M for Murder" updates and relocates the action from 50's London to contemporary New York and features Michael Douglas in the villainous Ray Milland part of the murderous husband who decides to kill his unfaithful wife not only for that reason but also because she's filthy rich and didn't sign a pre-nup when they married. He needs to act quickly too because as a Wall Street financier, his house of cards is falling apart, as with all his hedge bets off, he faces financial ruin.
His wife Gwyneth Paltrow is oblivious to this. She's out of love with him anyway but has found solace in a torrid affair with a bohemian artist, played by Viggo Mortenson in an early major role. She's edging towards leaving hubby but may not get the chance as he's meticulously planned her demise and what's more, he wants the lover to do the job for him.
Those of us familiar with Hitch's original will know that things don't go according to even the best-laid plan, the moral here being that perhaps a kitchen well-stocked with sharp objects isn't the best place to stage a killing but even when things do go awry, the quick-thinking Douglas pivots neatly to try to set up Paltrow for murder but hasn't planned for the actions of the similarly duplicitous Morgenson who also has an eye for the main chance.
If anything, the plotting here was even more contrived than in the original, to the point where it probably exploded the credibility of the narrative. For one thing, Paltrow seems so rich and in love with Morgenson that all he has to do is ask her for the not too considerable sum Douglas offers him. The major plot deviations where the lover becomes actively involved in the murder plot and the wife likewise turns from victim to detective and subsequently avenger also felt just too fantastical.
The film certainly looks good, especially the couple's fabulously appointed apartment but director Davis lacks Hitchcock's sense of pacing and flair with the camera. Douglas is good as the coldly calculating husband and Morgenson registers strongly as the pawn who wants to be king. Paltrow for me though is less convincing in a film which nonetheless makes a laudably strong effort to big up the original Grace Kelly role where her wife was little more than a passive victim of her husband's deadly machinations while David Suchet is criminally underused as the detective assigned to the case.
Never less than at least watchable as a present-day thriller, it certainly doesn't supplant the artistry which so infused the original feature on which it was based. Better perhaps to leave this kind of thing to Brian de Palma!
The Phantom of the Opera (1962)
The Phantom Menace
I've lately been watching a Monsters Inc.-like procession of low-budget horror movies from England's Hammer Studios and would probably pronounce this one the best I've seen, even as I understand it wasn't successful at the box office. I was surprised at how good it was, especially as it doesn't feature in its cast either of the two redoubtable British actors who so often took prominent roles in these productions, being of course Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee. Perhaps they were busy on other projects but anyway they weren't missed in this imaginative retelling of Gaston Laroux's immortal tale of "The Phantom of the Opera".
Herbert Lom stars in the title role, which naturally entails him acting for the most part behind a mask which in fact is somewhat different to the white half-face plaster-of-paris type we now more usually associate with the character, no doubt due to the successful musical adaptation of the tale, but nonetheless with his deep voice and expressive acting, he's excellent in the part. There's good support for him too with Heather Sears as his kidnap victim-turned protégé Christine, Edward de Souza as her ardent lover Harry Hunter and Michael Gough as the treacherous and lecherous Lord Ambrose D'Arcy, who not only cons the future Phantom, when he was the too-trusting Professor Petrie, into signing away all his compositions but also seeks to employ the casting couch for his own nefarious ends with every attractive female lead in his productions.
Tightly directed by Hammer perennial Terence Fisher, it tells its adapted story well, aided as usual by the company's convincing sets, in particular the Phantom's subterranean lair and the excellent use of music both incidental and for the extended "Saint Joan" operatic showpiece.
Modern audiences will baulk at the way the Phantom slaps Christine around for not "commiting to the role" and it also seemed to me that the prior crimes of the Phantom and his mute dwarf assistant got rather pushed aside in which a presumably innocent floor manager and rat catcher (the latter played by Patrick Troughton in another minor role before he regenerated into Dr Who later in the decade) both meet violent ends at their hands but at least the dastardly Lord got his too beneath the famous chandelier.
All in all, this was a version of the much-told story which deserves much wider recognition especially to those of us not in thrall to Lloyd-Webber's music.
The Persuaders!: That's Me Over There (1971)
It's Not You, It's Me
This episode of "The Persuaders" was written by one of my favourites writers for British television, the late Brian Clemens. Best known for his work on "The Avengers", "The New Avengers" and "The Professionals", he also wrote many episodes of the excellent "Thriller" TV series. Whenever I saw his name in the credits of a programme, it was always with a sense of anticipation and I was actually surprised to see that he wrote this episode for this altogether more relaxed and light-hearted series. Cutting his cloth accordingly, while it may have started like a vintage case for Steed and Peel, as a pair of employees, a young man and woman, seek to expose the nefarious operations of a highly respected and extremely powerful captain of industry by the name of Krane, but I might as well call him Murwell or Maxdoch, if you catch my drift, it soon relaxes into another easy-going case for the intrepid duo to crack.
The young man in question is caught in the act and conveniently falls off a roof leaving the young woman to try to get their proof, a tape recording, to the proper channels and so expose and bring the criminal kingpin to justice which of course is when she bumps into our heroes who, egged on by the judge, join the fray.
The highlights of this episode are when Danny and Brett are forced to impersonate one another with outrageous accents and mannerisms to match, there are entertaining scenes at an auction where Danny unwittingly commits Brett to an extravagant purchase before the usual punch-up at the end sees our heroes prevail and the big baddie taken down.
So, even if it didn't perhaps exhibit Clemens' more typical cleverly-plotted style, with entertaining dialogue put over as ever in the usual winning Curtis and Moore style, this was still an above average episode of what was, as childhood memory serves and modern-day rewatches prove, an entertaining and enjoyable series.
The Gorgon (1964)
Turn to Stone
Having plotted their way through the top-tier of scary monsters and super creepies, Hammer Studios effectively dropped down a division in producing this movie about old Snakeeyes herself, Magaera the Gorgon. Helpfully identified for us as one of the three demonic sisters whose stare was capable of turning to stone those who returned their gaze, of course it couldn't be the most famous of their number, Medusa, as she was slain by Perseus way back in the days of Greek Mythology.
Here, the creature manifests itself in early 20th Century Germany petrifying in more ways than one, a host of local victims. When a young girl becomes the latest victim and her boyfriend hangs himself in grief, the lad's father, an eminent professor, comes to investigate and soon suspects the old legend has come back to life. He confronts Peter Cushing's local expert Professor Namaroff and a pre-Dr Who Patrick Troughton's pliable police chief and becomes even more certain of a cover-up until he too is visited by Mageera and pays the ultimate price. Still, before he succumbs to his rocky ruin, he sends a letter to his son Paul who promptly arrives on the scene demanding answers.
He too gets the, pardon the pun, stonewall treatment apart from Namaroff's pretty female assistant Carla, who hints at darker events afoot. What does she know of the unnatural deaths in the area, will Carla's love for Paul save him in the end and just why does she seem to suffer from amnesia anytime Magaera does her stony stuff? The answers lie in that permanent feature of almost all the Hammer films of this time, an old, imposing castle and can Christopher Lee's visiting professor help Paul to break the mould and save the day?
Lee himself is on record as saying that he thought the unconvincing appearance of the gorgon herself marred the film's impact and he's right, although the transformation scene right at the end is effective enough. Overall, I enjoyed yet again director Terence Fisher's ability to create a suitably scary atmosphere with good sets, good background music and most of all, good acting, as usual by studio stalwarts Lee and Cushing but also well supported by Barbara Shelley as the conflicted Carla, Troughton as the nervous head of police and Richard Pasco as the investigative son.
On paper this may have been a rather silly premise for a movie but Hammered out in stone, it made for one of the studio's better chillers.
Sweet Bobby: My Catfish Nightmare (2024)
Bobby's Girl
On-line scams of different types are now almost a staple of the TV schedules. This Netflix production told the story of how a mature, (35 years old at the outset), seemingly intelligent single career woman was romanced om Facebook by a man she'd only met once years before and even then accidentally and fleetingly. This was the Bobby of the title, a handsome, successful and well-connected (an important consideration in the Sikh community of which she is a member) to whom she ended up in an "affair" which runs for over ten years without they're ever meeting.
At the time they first hooked up on-line, Kirat, the woman in question, was a successful London-basef career woman. Her day job was as a marketing executive, while in her off-time she deejayed on a local radio station. She was also in a long-term relationship and seemed ready to at last marry, with the point being strongly made that this was very much a desired outcome by her family, as the testimonies of both her parents and others close to her make clear.
However, when her romance breaks down, she takes comfort in the messages she starts to receive from Bobby, who appears to be free too and is keen to get to know her better. So their cyber-connection deepens with all-night Skype calls, gift-giving and soon enough, professions of love, all without ever physically getting together. Kirat gets to know Bobby's circle of friends and also starts inter-communicating with them too, but matters take a dramatic turn when Bobby is apparently shot and badly injured in Kenya and as a result enters Witness Protection in New York for his safety. His injuries mean he can't speak or appear on video but still the messages keep coming, leading up to a marriage proposal which Kirat ecstatically accepts. As Bobby slowly recovers, all she needs now is for him to finish the protection programme and actually meet up with her so that she can introduce him to the family and get on with the expected happy-ever-after marriage and succeeding parenthood.
But when he continues to prove elusive even after his "return" to England, alarm bells at last go off for Kirat with disastrous consequences for her when after she tracks him down in person, an almost unbelievable revelation explodes the whole concocted story.
Watching this compelling documentary, one is again reminded of how easily apparently responsible people fall for on-line tricksters again and again although the eventual reveal in this one was especially difficult to fathom in terms of motive. It is very easy to criticise Kirat herself for being so foolish as to allow herself to be strung along for so very long without becoming suspicious about what turned out to be a fantastic web of deceit contrived by her long-awaited dream man. It has to be said too that her neediness and susceptibility do occasionally portray her on-camera as a touch delusional and even as something of a fantasist but nothing can excuse the actions of the callous and twisted perpetrator who finally runs out of loom and is finally caught up in their own web of lies.
As a programme, it was sometimes difficult to watch Kirat walk and talk us through her obviously painful story. Told with mock-ups of the texting and messaging which were exchanged and the staging of key events as they occurred, complete with blurry images of actors playing them out, this was another cautionary tale of modern life and the pitfalls of wanting something too much. The only saving grace for Kirat here appeared to be that at least she wasn't swindled out of a large amount of money but she certainly got cleaned out emotionally. As the old saying goes, if something seems too good to be true, it probably is but try telling that to someone in love.
The Brides of Dracula (1960)
The Meinster Mash
Peter Cushing returns as Prof Van Helsing in this Hammer Studios follow-up feature to its successful updating of the Dracula character in its preceding production "Dracula". The only thing is that neither Dracula himself, or more importantly Christopher Lee in particular, returned with him and both their appearances are greatly missed.
Van Helsing is back in Transylvania however, this time on the trail of what today one might call an offshoot branch of Vampires Inc. As he pursues another vampiric figure who goes under the name of Lord Meinster. Naturally, you won't find him buried away in an office or a factory, but as ever ensconced in plain sight in a massive, gloomy Gothic castle out in the country.
The viewer is led to him by following a pretty young female teacher as she arrives at a local inn en route to her new position. Looking for a bed for the night, her options become severely limited when an elderly lady enters and makes her acquaintance, instantly emptying the place. The customers know what she doesn't, that she's been lined up by the old woman as the next victim of her bloodthirsty son, who she chains up in their castle. Quite why he only feasts on pretty young girls isn't made clear but with nowhere else to stay, the teacher is obligated to take up the offer of a bed for the night.
There, in daylight, she falls in love at first sight with the young Lord but little does she know what he gets his teeth into at night, when she innocently frees him from his chains. Then, when a local girl and the castle maid both subsequently die in mysterious circumstances, the good professor finally appears, bearing his essential travel items of a hammer and stake, crucifix and holy water as he seeks to track down the monster and by extension save the teacher.
I found I enjoyed this sequel a bit less than its predecessor. Cushing is as good as ever as the pursuing professor but he doesn't enter the action until the movie's thirty minutes in. I also have to say that the appearance of Lord Meinster in his vampire guise filled me more with amusement than fright, plus the special effects are thin on the ground and weak in execution, none worse than the vampire bat which flits around with more strings attached to it than Thunderbirds.
The script is weak, with poor dialogue, inexplicable plot jumps and strange out-of-character actions proliferating. The backgrounds are good but Cushing apart, the support acting is weak especially the actor playing Meinster / Dracula who in his full regalia comes over more as Camp than Count Dracula.
Lee would return to the Dracula role for Hammer in the future as the central character but I doubt even his appearance could have rescued this rather pallid and anaemic return of the lord of darkness.
The Revenge of Frankenstein (1958)
The Man With New Brains
After the runaway success of their first venture into reinventing the classics horror catalogue,it was inevitable that Hammer would return with a sequel to "The Curse of Frankenstein". Perhaps a better title to this feature would be "The Resurrection..." rather than "The Revenge of Frankenstein" as they roll back the ending to the first film by now showing the bad Baron cheating the guillotine which seemed to have claimed him before.
Three years have passed and he's now turned up with his own hospital of the poor, making such a success of it that the local society of doctors wants him to become a member but the doc curtly declines and we soon find out why. He's not given up on creating a living, breathing man and secretly has a project to do just that literally percolating away in the background. Attracted by his medical genius, Francis Matthews' young doctor joins him in his grand design but this time the creature isn't stitched together from recent body parts but instead is a full, recently exhumed "healthy" body, just in need of a brain to cone fully to life. Conveniently, the doctor's general dogsbody Carl has physical deformities and is up for swapping his brain to the handsome, fitsle specimen preserved in formaldehyde.
Successful transference duly takes place but almost inevitably, things don't go smoothly triggered by a young well-to-do female volunteer, to whom Carl previously took a shine, who humanely released the Mark 2 version into the community where, thanks to a bump on the head, he too proceeds to go on to commit murder and go on the run.
The plot here crosses over somewoeith the story of Jekyll and Hyde plus an agile, good looking creature such as this just doesn't have quite the same scare-appeal as the traditional hulking, green-skinned monster embedded in our imagination. Later however, the focus switches to Frankenstein himself as his past returns to haunt him before a neat ending is contrived to set up the next sequel.
Peter Cushing is excellent as always as the duplicitous doc and he's well supported by TV's future Paul Temple, Matthews as his new no. 2 while Michael Gwynne tries his best to convince us he's a monster in sheep's clothing, so to speak. With effective studio sets and a sympathetic orchestral soundtrack, this was another convincing, low-budget creature-feature from the studio whose name has become synonymous with the terror genre.
Cool Runnings (1993)
The Road to Calgary
This light-hearted, undoubtedly Disney-embellished retelling of the story of the Jamaican bobsleigh men's team's surprise entry to the 1988 Winter Olympics at Calgary certainly plays up the humorous aspect but also got across its broader message of commitment to a cause, defying the odds and probably most of all, national pride in a sunny, funny movie which like the team itself, surprised many when it was first released.
The team was formed when three hopeful sprinters who crashed out of the country's 100m Olympic trials came together to have a go at qualification instead in the unlikely sport of bobsleighing. They eventually win round their initially reluctant coach, disgraced former Olympian John Candy and on makeshift buggies going up and down rough hilly tracks in their native Jamaica, gradually hone their teamwork and technique to a level where they can actually meet the required qualification level to go to the games. They still need funding however and after some amusing ruses to raise the money all fail, it takes the sacrifice of the team's one rich member to find the $20000 dollars needed.
Once in Calgary they first experience the extreme cold they've never felt at home, their sense of displacement only compounded by the scorn heaped on them by their better funded and trained opponents, but with Coach Candy's persistence and resourcefulness, they not only managed to purloin an old American sledge with which to race but more importantly bond together into a team which in the end completes the course, gaining the respect of not only their fellow-competitors but also,more importantly, the support of their countryman and women back home, most of whom probably wouldn't recognise a bobsleigh if it slid right in front of them.
Like I said, I was thoroughly amused and enthused by this modern-day David and Goliath sporting fable. The humour was light, unforced and family-friendky and I also enjoyed the very different characterisations of the four team members, firstly the handsome, naturally-gifted athlete, then his best mate, the comic, almost Spike Lee-tyoe figure of fun, next the taciturn, steely, committed sprinter and finally the timid, rich daddy's boy who initially defies his stern old man to pay the team's way to Calgary.
This winning combination of humour and the cause of the underdog, filmed in bright colour to an effusive reggae-based soundtrack made for a pleasantly amusing and uplifting movie suitable for all the family.
The Hound of the Baskervilles (1959)
The Hounds of Hate
Hammer Studios, no doubt casting about for a new monster to feature in one of their movie productions, went somewhat left-field, in picking up on the Hound of the Baskervilles which meant of course that they had to go all-in on a Sherlock Holmes feature. It actually worked out pretty well with Peter Cushing making for a fine Holmes, bringing out well Conan Doyle's immortal detective's various quirks and ticks and Christopher Lee playing, no, not the hound this time, but instead the newly-installed current Sir Charles Baskerville who becomes the centre of a villainous plot to kill him to acquire his title, wealth and property.
Set at around the same time as the original book, it starts with a prologue which recounts the old story of the debauched Sir Hugo Baskerville who met his end at the paws of the legendary hell-hound of the moors for his murder of the daughter of a servant. We're then brought up to date with a retelling of the demise of the most recent Baskerville, the equally scandalous uncle and lord of the manor, Sir Charles
Baskeville again attributed to the devil-dog, not that you get to actually see it at this stage,
Holmes is hired by the family doctor to investigate the mysterious goings on at Baskerville and sends his faithful retainer Dr Watson on ahead to check the lie of the land. It's worth saying at this stage that this Dr Watson is no oafish sidekick as personified in Hollywood's Basil Rathbone and Nigel Bruce series of films in the late 30's but is actually resourceful and rather brave to the extent that he ends up almost getting himself killed in one of Dartmoor's treacherous quicksand marshes.
Holmes duly turns up, in rather unexpected fashion by which time the plot has been enriched to include an escaped prisoner, the local farmer and his exotically beautiful Spanish-descent daughter, all of whom will come to figure prominently as the story moves to its inevitable climax out on the moors.
While the story itself moves along rather fitfully, director Terence Fisher again uses his sets and dramatic use of music to create a suitably dark and mysterious atmosphere. As stated, Cushing has a good deal of fun playing the quixotic, human computer that is Holmes, Andre Morrell is credible as the redoubtable Watson and Lee, at last stepping out of the shadows into almost a lead romantic role, at last gets to show his up till then underused acting talent. Even if the long-delayed introduction of the "monster" itself is inevitably something of an anti-climax, there's more than enough here to mark this as one of the superior Holmes adaptations, sadly not picked up by the studio for further adventures, although both Cushing and Lee were indeed to play Sherlock in future film productions elsewhere.
The Persuaders!: Chain of Events (1971)
Suitcase's You, Sir...
A trip to the country inevitably goes west for our intrepid duo as a stroll by Danny ends up with him encountering a British agent who's parachuted into a tree and who before he expires, attaches an important attaché case to his wrist without giving him the key. Naturally the case is in demand, not only from British intelligence who have a team on the spot looking for it, but also a crack, let's call him Russian agent, at least judging by Peter Vaughn's attempted accent, who goes by the unlikely codename of Schubert.
In due course, Brett catches up with his chum and they both go on the run from Schubert and his recruits with matters becoming more confusing when the baddies don't police uniforms and even set up one of their own with a dummy case to throw MI5 off the case, no pun intended.
Danny hooks up, almost as you'd expect, with a pretty young female agent, coincidentally a childhood girlfriend of Brett's whose doctor father's country practice is handily close by where the boys go to use his X-ray equipment to learn what's in the case.
This leads to an amusing scene when the girl bursts in on Danny trying to take a shower still attached to the case and it all ends up in a face-off or should that be case-off between the secret service and Schubert and the explosive conclusion about the case contents is revealed.
A light, fun outing here for Messrs Curtis and Moore in this Terry Nation scripted episode which takes the old Hitchcock idea of setting up the audience with a McGuffin and literally running with it.
The Mummy (1959)
Mummy Fearest
If I was being honest, I'd put The Mummy probably a distant third behind Dracula and Frankenstein in the list of scary monsters. Nevertheless, Hammer inevitably turned to it for its next resuscitation of a legendary fright-figure after the success of its two previous films.
It's possible to see that said success has fed into this feature which has a longer running time and higher production values. A fair bit of that time, perhaps a little too much, is given to recreating the ancient Egyptian ceremonial ritual to provide the back-story but at least they have the benefit of allowing Christopher Lee to shed his bandages and speak a few lines rather than have to "eye-act" and lumber about, flailing his arms about as he's charged by his mortally offended modern-day native countryman with coming back to life to wreak revenge on Peter Cushing's family of archaeologists who unearth the tomb of a long-dead Egyptian princess, this being seen as a desecration of a holy site.
Naturally, the climax sees the monster close in on Cushing, who will pointlessly expend a lot of useless bullets trying to shoot the darned thing, but luckily for him an outrageous coincidence of resemblance will save the day and ultimately ensure that it will be well and truly swamped in the end.
Studio-bound as pretty much all of these early Hammer productions were, like I said, the sets here are very well dressed, even if you're never really given to believe that any actual location shooting outside of Bray Studios has ever been carried out. Again though the film is shot in luminous colour with an effective score adding to the excitement.
I always appreciate watching Cushing and Lee, especially together while Yvonne Furneaux, fresh from working with Antonioni and Fellini, effectively adds her literally transcendent beauty to proceedings.
Even if at times the movie plods along at about the same pace as the creature's hulking steps, I still found myself enjoying this solid adventure yarn.
Dracula (1958)
Out for the Count
After the surprise runaway success of their update of the Frankenstein story in "The Curse of Frankenstein", Hammer Studios was quick to cash-in by turning their attention to Dracula for its next excursion into horror. Using pretty much the same constituent parts, the result was another atmospheric thriller which sees Peter Cushing, this time as the good guy, chasing after Christopher Lee's literally bloodthirsty Count in Victorian-Era Romania.
He's on his trail after his assistant Jonathon Harker has failed to return from his mission to destroy old Drac, having tracked him down to his imposing castle lair. Quite what the vampire has against Harker and his family isn't made clear but he next targets Harker's fiancée Lucy and then his sister-in-law Mina with Van Helsing, armed with crucifixes, hammer and stake and garlic plants (!), with Mina's initially sceptical husband in tow, now in hot pursuit.
Jimmy Sangster's script smartly adapts enough aspects of the Inspirations of both the Bram Stoker novel and Bela Lugosi's early Hollywood feature into a suitably creepy and exciting chase story, while director Terrence Fisher ups the gore quotient as we see Lee's Dracula's blood-dripping fangs looking to administer his fatal love, or should that be death-bites, to all and sundry.
Cushing is great as the energetic, straight-arrow Van Helsing even if he's far from the book's aged professor, while Melissa Stribling and Carol Marsh make for comely female victims of the vampire but the real revelation is Lee as the mysteriously handsome Count. It's a pity, with his rich, stentorian voice, that he gets so little to say, but with suitably dramatic incidental music, he makes wonderfully sudden appearances as, his black cape billowing behind him, he swoops down on his victims.
Set-bound it may be, but old Bray Castle serves the story well with its Gothic features and while the special effects are few, mainly comprising the transformation scenes, they're nonetheless effective. Later Dracula movies would learn to put the title character front and centre of the action but this was the studio's second big success in the revived genre and deservedly so.
The Menendez Brothers (2024)
Brothers in Harm's Way
I came to this Netflix documentary about the Menendez brothers case, probably like a lot of other people, after viewing the same channel's recently broadcast controversial 9-part drama, released under the "Monsters" title. I personally couldn't remember anything about the case before I watched the series, however, what I think is pretty inarguable is that it was slanted in favour of the prosecution case, which eventually prevailed at a retrial, finding the brothers guilty of first-degree murder and sentenced to life imprisonment without parole.
This two-hour film however was very different. Using extensive recent audio-interviews with them, I believe there's equally little doubt that the film-makers believe that the two were indeed provoked by the alleged incestuous sexually abusive behaviour of their father, to shockingly shoot both him and his wife, their mother, while they watched TV in their palatial family home.
With access to many of the original participants in the case, including jurors from both trials, also witnesses and representatives for both the defence and the prosecution, including the original female prosecutor, this was highly provocative in the claims it seemed to make. The point is made that in the intervening thirty years, with society's acceptance of parental sexual abuse in particular by fathers on their own children, including their sons, coupled with the emergence of the "#MeToo" movement, that the siblings were incorrectly charged and subsequently sentenced to jail. The claim here is that they should have received the lesser sentence of manslaughter, which would have resulted in much shorter custodial sentences them both, meaning of course they would have long since been freed by now.
The point is also made that the pair likely caught the backlash of the DA Office's perception that the near-contemporary acquittal of OJ Simpson and before that also of the four policemen who beat up Rodney King, meant that they were determined to this time obtain a high-profile conviction with the notorious brothers fitting the bill. One other interesting fact is that on the original hung-jury, the 50/50 split amongst them was on a gender basis, with the six males voting guilty and the six females accepting the self-defence claim.
I thought from the TV series that I knew how I'd have voted if I'd been on either jury but this alternative counter-argument, did make me revisit my thoughts on the case.
That said, I do believe that being kept in jail for over 30 years is certainly long enough, even for the terrible crime they committed and tried to cover up and that I wouldn't argue if their soon-upcoming appeal is upheld and they are freed, as I believe is now probable.
Time has told and time will tell...
Joan (2024)
Joan Fakewell
Based on the book by Joan Hannington herself, this 6-part ITV series starred Sophie Turner in the title role as what you'd almost call a gentlewoman burglar. We're taken back to the early 80's and straight away dropped into Joan's world, just as her violent, criminal husband up and leaves her and their young child Kelly in the lurch. Joan tries to cope as a single parent, but when even a spell working for her sister fails to come off, she drifts into a life of crime, opportunely stealing a handful of diamonds from the jeweller's store where she was working. Running away from the cops, she bumps into her future husband, the spivvy antique-dealer "Boysie" Hannington. They click with each other straight away, as much on a criminal level as anything else and it's not long before they're cooking up get-rich quick plans for their mutual benefit, bringing in Boysie's equally shady, well-connected mate Albie to help with their more ambitious plans.
Over the six episodes we see just how easily Joan adapts herself to a life of deception. A veritable mistress of crime, she's as adept at donning disguises as she is at faking accents, for one job, she's Scottish and for others American. The road to true crime however never runs smoothly and the couple experience many a bump in said road as they recklessly try to dispose of a valuable Stubbs painting they've stolen to the IRA, leading Joan to dream up one last big heist to enable her and her daughter to escape to Spain and live happily ever after. Believe that and you'll believe anything, with crime decidedly not paying as her big idea to return to her old stamping ground to make one last big score doesn't go to plan in rather disastrous fashion, in different ways, for both her and hubby.
Knowing it was based on real-life events gave the programme credibility so that I could relax and watch every incredible up and down in Joan's life in proper truth-is-greater-than-fiction fashion, not that I doubt more than just the odd invention or distortion was made strictly for dramatic purposes, you understand.
Turner was terrific in the lead role, everything she did motivated by a need to keep her daughter close by her, after initially having to pass her over to Social Services at her lowest ebb. Smart, tough and sexy, she runs rings around most of the men around her and is well backed up by Frank Dillane as her literal partner in crime Boysie and Gershwyn Eustache Jr as Albie the go-between.
I certainly found it a gripping and involving watch, the programme aptly conveying time and place with its use of locations, cars, fashions, furnishings and music. It was definitely one of the best ITV crime dramas I've seen although I guess there is a debate to be had about whether or not a show like this glamourises crime. Some may argue that hers were largely victimless crimes but tell that to the honest citizens she robbed, more than one of whom experienced violence and no doubt emotional trauma at the hands of her and her accomplices...
Icons of Football: Jen Beattie (2024)
Beattie Beats the Big C
It says more about me that with regards to this, the fifth episode of series two of BBC Scotland's Icons of Football that I had no idea at all who Jennifer Beattie was or indeed is. I knew about her father and brother, both called John, highly regarded Scottish rugby union internationals but of their daughter and sister respectively, not a clue. I just haven't engaged so far with women's football but nevertheless hers is an interesting and uplifting story and one that was well told here.
The programme makers have stretched their definition of what is a Scottish football icon insofar as Beattie, unlike all the eleven other entries, is much younger than the rest and in fact is still an active football player but obviously the decision has been made in respect of her achievements both on and off the field to award her the accolade.
Capped an impressive 143 times for Scotland and having won top trophies at a number of top club teams including Arsenal (twice), Manchester City and Montpellier in France, she's now signed up for American club Bay City as the next step in her career.
Her biggest challenge however has undoubtedly been going public with her diagnosis of breast cancer from which she's thankfully now been discharged and for which personal courage, as well as her career achievements, she's been rewarded with the coveted Helen Rollason BBC Sports Personality of the Year Award and indeed an MBE medal, the remembrance of the latter, in particular, clearly makes her emotional on camera.
She appears to be from an especially loving family and seems to draw a lot of inspiration from them, all of whom speak lovingly of her in the programme. I can only wish her well in her future career and like I said, was happy here to be enlightened not only on her career to date but also a bit more on the women's game in general.
The Curse of Frankenstein (1957)
Frankie Goes to Hollywood
The first Hammer Studios horror-themed release back in 1957 sought to remake one of the classic stories and movie monsters of old, in this case Frankenstein. The result was this excellent, tightly directed and well-acted feature which introduced two of the studio's acting mainstays in the coming years, the equally excellent Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee.
Obviously, Cushing as the misguided, malevolent doctor has much more to do here than Lee, who basically just gets to blunder about as the reborn creature, but I'm glad he obviously did enough to soon get cast as Lord Dracula himself in the studio's next reboot.
Here, it's interesting to see the Baron as something of a womaniser too, having a below-stairs affair with his young maid-servant, duping his pretty, doting cousin who comes to stay and whom he soon marries. I wouldn't say that Lee's creature is particularly monstrous or scary either but nevertheless with the help of the excellent colour photography, Gothic interiors and an atmospheric score which serves to heighten the tension, the end result is a very effective thriller if not quite chiller, which served to re-energise horror movies in general and put Hammer on the map as a film production company to be reckoned with.
Icons of Football: John Greig (2024)
Captain Courageous
In this, the final episode of BBC Scotland's second series devoted to the "Icons of (Scottish) Football", there was no question at all about the status of the chosen subject. Rangers legend John Greig was a one-team-man who was made captain of the team at a young age and came to become identified as Mr Rangers throughout his long and distinguished career. Never a highly skilled player, he nevertheless made the most of his ability and in particular, set a true captain's example to his teammates with his determination, leadership qualities and will-to-win.
Ironically for the man voted as the best Rangers player of all time, young Greig was born on the east coast of Scotland and as a boy was a keen Hearts fan. However, his diminutive appearance as a youngster (which he certainly outgrew in adulthood) put off his hometown team and he ended up signing for Rangers instead.
He was quickly promoted to the first team in the great Rangers side of the early 60's and blossomed into a tough, hard-tackling midfielder although later in his career he would often play at full back. It wasn't long either before he was chosen for his country, for whom he scored probably scored the best and most famous goal of his career against Italy at Hampden in 1965, smashing home a last-minute winner after playing a brilliant 1-2 with Jim Baxter.
The years 1965-1974 saw the emergence of Jock Stein's "Lisbon Lions" who won 9 Scottish League titles in a row, putting Rangers very much in the shade. Even when Celtic won the European Cup in 1967, Rangers had the chance the very next week to win the Cup Winners Cup but came unstuck against the German giants Bayern Munich.
In the years ahead, Greig was to experience the depths of despair as he was the Rangers club captain at the time of the terrible Ibrox Disaster of 1971 which claimed 66 lives at Ibrox Stadium and then the joy of leading the team to victory in the Cup Winners Cup final of 1972 in Barcelona although the night was tarnished to some extent by a pitch invasion of the celebrating Rangers fans and the overzealous reaction of the Spanish police.
Fittingly, he retired from his long career out on the pitch, a winner of the 1976 Scottish Cup before immediately afterwards taking on the Rangers management job which he carried out over the next four years with mixed success.
With contributions from fellow "Barcelona Bears" team-mates Peter McCloy, Colin Stein and Willie Johnston as well as journalists Chick Young, Archie MacPherson and comedian Andy Cameron, this was one programme you felt could have been extended to take in even more of Greigy's full career.
The man himself comes over as loyal and proud but self-effacing and it seemed only fitting that the statue erected outside Ibrox to commemorate the 66 deaths on January 2nd 1971 should be of him, bearing as it does the names of every fan crushed to death that day.
The Hurricane (1937)
Johnny and the Hurricane
John Ford directing a disaster movie seems about as unlikely as Hitchcock directing a rom-com, or Howard Hawks directing a musical - wait, those things actually happened too! Like in the early 70's, it seemed to be the season around 1936-37 for Hollywood fixing on natural disasters to bolster story-lines, as evidenced by the recent success of "San Francisco" and "Old Chicago Town". Here, the great man takes us to the South Sea islands for a tale of passion, duty, courage and yes, lots and lots of winds and floods.
The film starts with Thomas Mitchell's grizzled and usually sozzled old doctor on board a passing boat, pointing out the desolate and deserted island of Malacure and before you can say "Fantasy Island" we're carried back a number of years to a time when he was slightly less grizzled and sozzled, in fact a happy and contented doctor to the island natives. They're not so benevolently ruled by a strict and unyielding white governor, played by Raymond Massey who's accompanied by his more sympathetic wife, played by Mary Astor.
Jon Hall is the handsome and athletic, mixed-race, first mate on a returning schooner to the magically exotic Malacure, where awaiting him is his pretty young fiancée, Miramar, played by Dorothy Lamour. But in an incident oddly prescient of later Civil Rights activists in the 50's and 60's, he punches out a white racist who demands that he gets up from a seat in a public bar. When he receives a trumped charge of six months hard labour and Governor Massey refuses to bend to the exhortations of the ship's captain, the doc and even his own wife, to intervene in his favour, set in motion are the two big what-ifs of the movie, namely, will Hall and Lamour be reunited and will Massey receive an overdue dose of humanity in the time remaining.
Well, that's when the mother and father of all hurricane storms takes a hand with some pretty amazing special effects and the actors taking a real soaking, as pretty much the whole of the Pacific is seemingly launched their way, which as you'd expect, does much to set up the final resolution of all the loose plot ends. While I'm on the subject, kudos too to whoever carried out the two spectacular high-dives over the rocks into the churning sea.
Style-wise, I must admit I didn't detect much of Ford's hand in this at all apart from Mitchell's presence but I have to say it definitely was a ripping yarn and good entertainment all the way through.
Icons of Football: Willie Miller (2024)
The Miller's Tale
Unquestionably, Aberdeen and Scotland defender Willie Miller is a merited entry in BBC Scotland's Icons of Football series in this, the fourth episode of Series 2. In a superb Aberdeen team of the early 80's, under the management of the emergent Alex, later of course Sir Alex Ferguson, the Dons finally broke the long-standing hegemony in Scottish football of Celtic and Rangers and more than that achieved European success too by beating the likes of Bayern Munich and Real Madrid on the way to winning the European Cup Winners Cup in unforgettable style in 1984.
Miller was that rarity, a one-team-man, who was converted from a striker to a defender and along with the tall, commanding centre-half Alex McLeish formed probably the best central defensive club partnership in the country's history, which also continued into the national side.
Here, the quiet spoken, relatively unemotional Miller tells his tale, backed up by the usual clips of incisive tackle after incisive tackle as well as the occasional goal and glowing tributes from McLeish, star teammate Gordon Strachan and even the ageing, ailing but effusive Ferguson himself.
My favourite clip was when he was asked on the pitch by an interviewer after playing his last ever game if there was a tear in his eye - "Never!" he said as he nonchalantly jogged off to join the rest of his teammates. Miller later almost inevitably became Aberdeen manager but was sacked after two years before turning to punditry which he still plights to this day on BBC Radio Scotland.
One of the highest achieving players in the Scottish game, he undoubtedly deserved the accolades he received in this half-hour mini-biography.
Icons of Football: Joe Jordan (2024)
Killer Joe
This has been my favourite episode to date of BBC Scotland's Icons of Football series. If, like me, you are a Scotland fan of a certain vintage, big Joe was an almost literally larger-than-life character, who had the happy knack of scoring important goals, especially for his country. The point is made that he's one of only a handful of players to score goals at three separate World Cup Finals and remember Joe had fewer games in which to do so as Scotland have never progressed past the three group qualifying games of any major tournament in which they've played (and probably never will!).
You can also gauge the big man's quality from the level of teams he represented, which included the great Don Revie- led Leeds team of the mid-70's, Manchester United and then AC Milan, although he's never forgotten his roots as he speaks warmly of his start at lowly Greenock Morton where it took only six games for him to be spotted by Leeds.
To his opponents he must have seemed an imposing, if not downright fearsome figure to behold with his height, strong physique and of course lacking his two front teeth (after an early footballing accident which brought him nicknames like Jaws or just the Shark when he played in Italy for Milan). Even post-retirement, as assistant manager to Harry Redknapp's Tottenham Hotspur side, he famously went toe-to toe on the sidelines with Milan firebrand player Rene Gattuso..The programme also didn't shy away from the major controversy in his international playing career over the "Hand of Joe" incident which won Scotland a vital penalty in a world Cup qualifier against Wales.
As usual, there are several notables from his football past who came forward to speak up on his behalf, most notably Fabio Capelli and Johnny Giles, but the most touching tribute came from the daughter of his Leeds, Man U and Scotland teammate, centre-half Gordon McQueen who recently passed away from dementia, possibly acquired from years of heading a ball during his career. Joe was also a great header of a ball too and candidly shared his own fears of one day falling victim to this awful disease.
But for now he's hail and hearty and long may that continue. Although I've enjoyed all the episodes of the two series I've watched so far, not every subject in my eyes quite deserved the accolade of icon. Joe unquestionably does and if I was picking a team for my life, he'd be the centre forward for sure.