Change Your Image
junagadh75
Reviews
Viaje al centro de la tierra (1977)
campy but not all that bad
"Where Time Began" is an adaptation of Jules Verne's "Journey to the Center of the Earth", with some variations to make it more salable (such as a love interest). It seems to have been aimed at a juvenile audience and is in the same vein as the Kevin Connors/Amicus Studios adaptations of Edgar Rice Burroughs. Like many genre films, "Where Time Began" has very hokey characters and dialogue. The ineptitude with which the journey to the center of the earth is conducted is quite startling, in fact. The stupidity of their dialogue (especially the exchanges between Glauben and her idiotic fiancee Axel) gives the film a strong tone of campiness and unintentional humor. When Olsen shows up to rescue them midway through and complains that he's had to listen to their stupid chatter for the past ten miles, the viewer can commiserate. However, given the fact that it is a low budget film, the sets, photography and giant creature special effects are actually pretty good, and they manage to maintain some atmosphere throughout the production. Once the characters arrive in the pseudo-prehistoric world at the center of the earth, the film especially picks up, and the revelation of the origin of Olsen provides an interesting twist. For this reason, "Where Time Began" is a reasonable entry in the journey-to-a-lost-world genre.
Spermula (1976)
hilarious and obscure sleeper
"Spermula" is about a race of bodiless aliens living on the doomed planet of Spermula, and their attempts to eradicate the human race so that they can have their planet. The Spermulites take the form of women whose mission is to suck all the sperm out of the human males, thereby dooming the species; despite admonishments that they do not enjoy their sexual acts with the human males, all of them eventually begin to succumb to the temptations of the flesh. The famous Udo Kier plays a Spermulite who has been accidentally made a male (with an inconsiderable member), and who refuses to ask the "Great Mother" that he be made a female: he wants to be male and marry a woman. This unique and bizarrely stylized satire of conventional sexual morality somehow never became a cult hit - and very undeservedly too, as it is filled with some of the funniest dialogue this side of "Andy Warhol's Bad". As I understand it, the French filmmakers dubbed this into English themselves for their own aesthetic purposes, but I'm not entirely sure of this. It is now very obscure, but well worth the effort it takes to ferret out a copy - and hopefully some day it's worth will be more widely recognized and appreciated.
The Mighty Gorga (1969)
dregs of the "giant ape" genre *SPOILER*
"The Mighty Gorga" is probably the worst King Kong rip-off there is. The plot concerns an impecunious circus owner going to a Congo that looks strangely like southern California in search of a giant species of ape that will make his circus some money. Along the way he picks up a woman who is searching for her father (who also wanted to exploit the giant ape), and they encounter a tribe of Indians (played by Caucasian actors) who sustain Gorga on the flesh of maidens so that he doesn't trash their village. The characters wonder what Indians are doing in Africa, but no explanation is ever given (and, incidentally, the only Black person observed during their visit to the Congo speaks English without a foreign accent). In the final scene, the protagonists still haven't captured Gorga, but state their intention to do so although they have no idea how they will transport him back to the States. The special effects are simply unbelievable - the giant ape costume is worse than anything seen in a high school drama production, the one composite shot of the ape and the humans together is pathetic, and the "Indian" scenes (especially the colloquies between the witch doctor and the ape) are like "Gilligan's Island" scenarios; but worst of all is the dinosaur sequence in which the human characters fend off a plastic Tyrannosaur puppet (no exaggeration - it's really that bad) by pelting it with its own eggs, and then observe it being fought to the death by Gorga - this scene is an absolute insult. Even as a devotee of schlock cinema, I was shocked at the ineptitude of this film - it fell far below my already low expectations. If there is a worse giant ape film around, I haven't seen it, and I'd have to see it to believe it.
Fight Club (1999)
overrated
"Fight Club" is about a yuppie who, dissatisfied with his hollow life, turns first to support groups which he doesn't need to fill his emptiness, and then by chance becomes involved with a marginal character played by Brad Pitt; together they start a "Fight Club" in which lonely, empty men like themselves get together and pound each other just for the sensation. Eventually the "Fight Club" takes over the nation. I know alot of people whose opinions I otherwise respect who think this is a really good, intellectually challenging movie - I thought it was nothing special. The basic concept and its development never struck me as anything other than smarmy and obvious and the humor as merely cutesy (in fact, the plot seemed like a slightly-raunchier-than-average sitcom premise extended to feature-length). The MTV-style direction was ... MTV-style direction, that's all. The only thing that it really had going for it was that Brad Pitt, whom I knew only as a People Magazine pretty boy, proves that he can actually act - but that trivial fact doesn't make for an entire movie. If you really want to see a decent satire on contemporary America, check out "Andy Warhol's Bad", and forget this lame attempt at meaning by filmmakers whose talents are better suited for mass-produced Cineplex product.
Bad (1977)
satiric masterpiece
"Andy Warhol's Bad" concerns a rapacious middle-age housewife in NYC who runs an electrolysis business and a murder-for-hire (with only female employees) business out of her home. There are various subplots, involving her hired assassins, their clients, and her mentally dull daughter-in-law who lives with her (and whom she cruelly exploits). Although often considered "camp", a la the films of John Waters, "Bad" is in reality more of a satire in the vein of "Gulliver's Travels". The critique is presents of contemporary, capitalist values in American society is right on target, so that the thoroughly unrealistic plot seems all too real. Even more, this film has perhaps the funniest, most original dialogue of any film ever made - you'll never forget the dangerously paranoid Brigid Polk (a.k.a., Brigid Berlin) and the two amoral sisters she hires to kill a dog. The acting, by both pros and Warhol superstars, is excellent. It even manages to successfully pull off the few moments of poignancy that are allowed in the bleak world it depicts (the assault on the dog and his owner, the final epiphany of L.T. when his empathy prevents him from killing an autistic child and his subsequent confrontation with Hazel). This is not a film for most people - it is far too pessimistic, brutal and graphic - but if you can stomach that, it is more than worth your while to see.
Pixote: A Lei do Mais Fraco (1980)
emotionally devastating Brazilian film
"Pixote" concerns the (mis)adventures of the eponymous hero, a pre-adolescent boy in urban Brazil, abandoned by his parents, who first endures the horrors of a youth prison, and then those of life on the street. Filmed in a quasi-documentary style with real street kids instead of professional actors (for the most part), "Pixote" will leave the viewer utterly devastated at the end of its 2+ hours. It is particulary effective when it develops other characters as they are seen by Pixote, especially those of the streetwise transvestite homosexual Lilica and the aging alcoholic prostitute Sueli (unforgettably portrayed by Marilia Pera, one of the few pro actors in the cast), who become surrogate parents to the young boy in a kind of improvised family whose economy is based on mugging Sueli's clients. Both the tragic denoument (which comes at the end of a film in which tragedy follows tragedy, ad infinitum), and the final shot of Pixote playing alone on the railroad tracks with haunting accompanying music on the soundtrack, are unbearably poignant. A masterpiece.
Voyage to the Planet of Prehistoric Women (1968)
interesting sci-fi oddity
"Voyage to the Planet of Prehistoric Women" concerns a party of cosmonauts attempting to rescue another group on Venus. Along the way they encounter prehistoric monsters and other perils, and there is an intelligent robot. This part of the film is really an excellently made Russian sci-fi film called "Storm Planet", while the other part concerns a band of telepathic Venusian cave girls led by Mamie Van Doren, who worship a pterosaur named Tera and watch the struggles of the cosmonauts from afar; this other part was spliced in by P. Bogdonovitch (at R. Corman's behest? I'm not sure), and is ridiculous camp. I've seen two versions of this film (not including the Russian original), one without the Van Doren sequences. Although it is regarded as a psychotronic/cult/camp type of film, the classiness of the original manages to come through most of it, and the pacing benefits from the exclusion of a stereotypically sexist subplot involving a female crewmember's misplaced patriotic zeal.
Planeta bur (1962)
high-quality Soviet sci-fi
"Planeta Bur" is about cosmonauts who are lost on Venus, attempting to return to the spaceship, and their adventures along the way, which include encounters with prehistoric reptiles, a volcano, and other perils. Like Ptushko's "Sadko", this is a true gem of fantastic film. The use of natural and artificial sets is very effective in creating an atmospheric, alien world; the monsters (an intelligent robot, a carnivorous plant, pestiferous lizard men, a pterodactyl, and some other dinosaurs) are similarly well done. Unlike American films of this kind, there is no emphasis on macho violence or digressions into "steamy" romance scenes; instead the film concentrates on the lavish visuals in an unhurried and dignified pace. My only complaints are that the introduction is too long and slow-moving, and that the subplot involving Masha's agonizing over the fate of her comrades isn't very interesting; but the scenes on Venus, which comprise the bulk of the film, more than make up for these flaws. "Planeta Bur" was drastically edited by Peter Bogdonavitch and released in the States as "Voyage to the Planet of Prehistoric Women"; two versions exist, one with footage of Mamie Van Doren leading a tribe of telepathic Venusian women and worshipping the pterodactyl of the original film, the other without Ms. Van Doren or any of the prehistoric reptile footage.
Evils of the Night (1985)
fun trash with an all-star cast
"Evils of the Night" involves two extraterrestrial women (Tina Louise and Julie Newmar) who hire a couple of idiot rednecks to kidnap and kill 'teens for them, so that they can use the blood to prolong their race (or something like that). I saw this movie in a theater by a fortuitous accident when it was released in 1986: the print of the just-released "Nightmare on Elm Street" had failed to arrive, so the theater owners were showing "Evils..." in its place. My friends and I laughed the whole way through, and were delighted by the many familiar faces in the cast - we never thought we'd see Julie Newmar again! If, like myself, you enjoy following the careers of grade-B stars, you'll get a kick out of this obscure piece of low-budget gore/horror schlock.
The Cross and the Switchblade (1970)
hilarious Christian exploitation film
_The Cross and the Switchblade_ is definitely one of the best *bad* films ever made, and deserves the merit ordinarily reserved for such turkeys as _Plan 9 from Outer Space_. The plot, concerning a small town preacher who goes to the big city to *save* young hoodlums is utterly laughable; depictions of drug use and gang violence reflect middle-class suburban Christian fantasies rather than any reality; and the dialogue is stupefyingly silly - you'll be reciting it with your friends for laughs for weeks afterward. The ostensibly do-gooder preacher and his cronies inadvertantly reveal themselves as complete sleazeballs time after time, with hilarious results: in one sequence, the preacher finds Nicky (the main hoodlum) severely stabbed in an alley, and offers to take him to the hospital only on the condition that he accept Jesus right then and there; Nicky refuses, and is left to fend for himself. The scene in which the preacher enters the apartment of the drug dealer who reputedly controls all of the gangs in the Bronx and finds a groovy hippy pad is a priceless piece of camp. This would make a great double feature with that other masterpiece of low-budget Christian exploitation, _Blood Freak_.
Ercole alla conquista di Atlantide (1961)
good sword&sandal
Although this is yet another Italian sword-&-sandal fantasy, it is also an adaptation of Pierre Benoit's novel _L'Atlantide_. It seems to contain, moreover, a good deal of coded homoeroticism (not uncommon for the genre). For these reasons _Hercules and the Captive Women_ (inaccurately named) has a more interesting plot than other sword-&-sandal films. The usual kind of macho action of the genre is relatively downplayed, with attention paid to the more exotic aspects of the story (the idea of the lost Atlantean civilization is developed in detail). And the Proteus monster is a hoot!
Cesta do pravyeku (1955)
enchanting prehistoric adventure film
If you loved prehistoric life as a child, this film is perfect. The plot concerns four boys who travel down an otherworldly river and encounter the various stages of prehistoric life along the way. The stop-motion dinosaurs and numerous other prehistoric animals not usually seen on film (as far as I know, this is the only film that ever recreated the Carboniferous Age), as well as the painted backdrops, are imaginatively conceived and executed. The characters of the four boys are also humanely and realistically developed (a rarity for children's characters in films), so that _Cesta do praveku_ is equally enjoyable for adults. Unfortunately, the American version is horribly dubbed and has a ludicrous prologue to explain how the boys got to the river tacked on by the distributor; but the originality of the film still comes through, so it's worth watching if the original Czech version is unavailable (as it mostly is).
Sadko (1953)
masterpiece of the fantastic
_Sadko_ is a masterpiece of cinematic fantasy - there doesn't seem to be one frame that doesn't enthral, and the recreations of medieval Ukraine and India are unsurpassed by any other historical/fantasy film. The dubbed American version, _The Magic Voyage of Sinbad_, is a bit of a travesty, but I recently saw the complete Russian version with subtitles at a Ptushko retrospective which was going around the country, so it may soon be possible to finally get the real thing on video.