Change Your Image
dt_one
Reviews
The Mend (2014)
No
This film is up for an Independent Spirit Award, but I would be hard pressed to tell you why. This would be story is about a bunch of low rent characters rejected by Woody Allen who, while in their mid-thirties, feel like they are still on the grade school playground. The whole first act is a house party where nothing really happens. Just a bunch of background music that is too loud over the mumble core 101 dialog that goes flat. At some point we finally realize that the plot is about two brothers arguing about their father with no real back story, as well as a predictably romance gone wrong. You would get better conversation talking to your unemployed neighbor! Austin Pendleton provides the lone, almost passable personality to this two hour waste of time. Actually, ten minutes might have been too much.
S.F.W. (1994)
the title says it all
It is one thing for a film to merely be bad, it is quite another for it to insult your intelligence. The latter happened to me in this non-attempt at filmmaking. How the likes of Stephen Dorff and Reese Witherspoon (one of my all time favorite actresses) got messed up in this I'll never know, but I hope they fired their managers afterward. This is, quite possibly, the single worst movie I have ever seen (Roger Ebert agrees!). Every character seems to be a ripoff of some celebrity who probably had the common sense to steer clear of this movie. Every situation seems entirely implausible. What's more, the writer seems to have a vocabulary that extends to only the three words in the title (you figure it out). This was a painful movie to watch, not because of it's depth, but because it is so inexcusably horrible. It may be the first time in my life that I actually felt sorry for the actors, who really were at the mercy of this doomed screenplay. I so not buy for one minute the notion that this movie may simply have been "too deep" to appreciate. Please, I do not need to be insulted again. Reese, I still think you are on top of your game, and this was ten years ago during your indie phase, so I don't hold you accountable, just please don't let it happen again.
S.F.W. (1994)
the title says it all
It is one thing for a film to merely be bad, it is quite another for it to insult your intelligence. The latter happened to me in this non-attempt at filmmaking. How the likes of Stephen Dorff and Reese Witherspoon (one of my all time favorite actresses) got messed up in this I'll never know, but I hope they fired their managers afterward. This is, quite possibly, the single worst movie I have ever seen (Roger Ebert agrees!). Every character seems to be a ripoff of some celebrity who probably had the common sense to steer clear of this movie. Every situation seems entirely implausible. What's more, the writer seems to have a vocabulary that extends to only the three words in the title (you figure it out). This was a painful movie to watch, not because of it's depth, but because it is so inexcusably horrible. It may be the first time in my life that I actually felt sorry for the actors, who really were at the mercy of this doomed screenplay. I so not buy for one minute the notion that this movie may simply have been "too deep" to appreciate. Please, I do not need to be insulted again. Reese, I still think you are on top of your game, and this was ten years ago during your indie phase, so I don't hold you accountable, just please don't let it happen again.