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Reviews
Papillon (2017)
Why?
There must have been some tax reasons to make this... it's pointless and the original is far superior.
It's like recommissioning the Mona Lisa in order to bring it to a new audience.
The Undoing (2020)
Presumed Innocent Rip Off?
Nicole Kidman did it. There I've said it! I always knew that Nicole Kidman was no good when I first saw her in Dead Clam and Far & Away...
Casablancas, l'homme qui aimait les femmes (2016)
A Memoir of Creep? Should have been called "Predator"
This is appalling especially in light of Jeffery Epstein et al.
This old guy was having relationships with underage girls...
This guy was a creep!
It should have been called "Predator".
Anchorman 2: The Legend Continues (2013)
A worthy follow up.
I really like this film, and I think it gets better with age too.
I laughed a total 50.5 times during this sequel, compared with 51 times for the original.
I appreciate that the first film was 0.5 better, however this film pleases me.
A Hologram for the King (2016)
Saved me a trip to Saudi Arabia
I nearly visited Saudi Arabia on holiday but thank God I saw this film and it informed me about this country.
As soon as the film's end credits rolled I called my travel agent and cancelled my trip, and I then instructed my agent to book me a trip to Benidorm instead.
The Goes Wrong Show: A Trial to Watch (2020)
I laughed so much a little bit of poo came out.
So stupid it's funny.
I laughed so much, I needed a new pair of boxer shorts!
Moreover, it's tv the whole family can watch.
The Two Popes (2019)
A fantastic piece of propaganda for the Catholic Church; just like the Crown is for the Royal Family...
I just watched the pope film on Netflix.
It's a fantastic piece of propaganda, just like The Crown is for the royal family.
Anto Hopkins and Jonathan Pryce deserve recognition for their roles.
I hear that Hollywood is controlled by non catholics, so I guess this film will be allowed to fade away...
The Peter Serafinowicz Show (2007)
Rick & Morty Stole from this...
This is the real inter-dimensionsal tv!
Worth a watch!
Peter Serafinowicz is a genius.
Once Upon a Time in... Hollywood (2019)
This film is unsure of itself.
I found this film to be a bit of a mess. Moreover, I couldn't understand why Tarantino insisted on putting adds for a Bitcoin casino on the screen every 5 minutes.
I also found that the print of the film was grainy and dark. The sound was horrendous too. It was as if the cinematographer used his home video camera to shoot the film... maybe this is how films were in the 1960s?
Hopefully these issues will be sorted for the Blu-ray release.
I.T. (2016)
Where's the clown!?!
This film was mis-sold, there were no scary clowns in this film and no sign of any of Stephen King's writing.
It's a classic case of the studio interfering with the source material to its detriment.
However, the only thing close to a clown in the film is Pierce Brosnan for signing up to be in such muck...
Free Solo (2018)
Disappointed it wasn't about freeing Hans Solo from Jabba the Hutt.
The title is very misleading as I interrupted "Free Solo" to be a kind of additional sequel to the Emipre Strikes Back.
If the title read "Free solo" (lowercase S) I wouldn't have been confused...
Anyway, it's a good film about climbing, but in no way related to Star Wars, hense I'm only awarding it 6 out of 10.
This Time with Alan Partridge: Episode #1.4 (2019)
I wet myself laughing.
A splendid episode. I laughed 44.5 times during this episode. That's an average of more than one laugh a minute.
Funniest TV since... never, it's out there on its own, with no comparison.
The Conjuring 2 (2016)
The Cast Deserve an Award for Keeping Straight Faces!
What more can I say... I couldn't have delivered those lines without cracking up!
These guys are true professionals.
Bird Box (2018)
Sandra Prepared for a Michael Jackson Bio...
I tried to like this film but I think Sandra Bullock showed up to play Michael Jackson...
I found this very confusing.
First Man (2018)
Good Film But Michael Collins Got The Better Bio.
I liked this film and really identified with the love that a father has for his child, however I got to learn very little about the man prior to his time in NASA. It's good but could have been better.
Moreover, Michael Collins (the lad who was left behind in the capsule on Apollo 11) had a better bio made about him by Neil Jordan back in 1996 and unfortunately his film is long forgotten.
Michael Collins (1996)
Armstrong Gets Too Much Glory
I stumbled across this little known film as a result of watching "First Man".
I wanted to know more about the other crew members of Apollo 11 and I was pleasently surprised by this film.
It's a shame that the world doesn't know more about the life of Michael Collins before he joined the NASA space program and helped Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin be the first men on the moon.
House of Cards: Chapter 73 (2018)
This is why women shouldn't be allowed to be president!
This final season is a warning as to why a woman should never be president. Claire Underwood is pure evil!
I'm afraid for the future of an America with Claire Underwood as the president, however I will sleep well tonight knowing that Donald Trump is the incumbent president.
Thelma & Louise (1991)
Natural Born Killers has more soul!
This film is offensive to men. I was offended by the blatant missndry and as a man who has feelings, it made me scared of all women.
There's nothing empowering to women, by them going around killing and robbing and taking advantage of young runaway boys.
I preferred Natural Born Killers as a buddy move.
Mamma Mia! Here We Go Again (2018)
Grease 2 works better as a sequel.
I was in the mood for this sequel, but I have to say that this film is just awful. It starts bad and just goes downhill from there. If you want ABBA music, just listen to their albums!
Moreover, I have to say that Grease 2 is far superior in every way as a musical sequel.
The Shallows (2016)
Dear God, please forgive them for making this movie.
Dear God,
I'm grateful from the shots of Blake Lively in her bikini, however this film is just awful (a bag of mickies). I was actually rooting for the shark, it was so bad.
Please forgive the director for his misdirection and please also forgive the CGI guy and his old Dell laptop for the terrible special effects.
Amen.
Tully (2018)
Would have been much better if Arnold Schwarzenegger was in it.
This film is very odd. I thought that Arnold Schwarzenegger's portrayal of pregnancy and motherhood in Junior was far more convincing than Charlize Theron's in this film.
The third act of the film is simply nuts... Moreover there are quite a few holes in the plot!
The Dark Knight Rises (2012)
Jaws, The Revenge worked better as a sequel.
The final chapter of the Jaws franchise worked better than this film.
In summary, The Dark Knight Rises is dumb beyond belief, hollow, bloody and nonsensical.
The Necessary Death of Charlie Countryman (2013)
A decent film
This film deserved a better reception. It's better than most of the rubbish that's peddled by the big studios these days.
The narrative is a bit clunky at times but there's real power and meaning in the story and the cast deliver very strong performances and credit is due to the director who has shown real promise as a first rate storyteller.
The scene with the protagonist and his mother at the beginning of the film is extremely powerful and so strong it lets the rest of the film down; meaning expectations were so high for a weighty deep meaningful film, thus the narrative becomes clunky at times.
Finally, the director's use of music really underpins the film.
Step Brothers (2008)
This is the Greatest Film Ever Made!
I have three favourite films of all time, they are as follows, in ranking order;
Step Brothers,
Schindler's list,
Gandhi.
I need not say anymore.
Tag (2018)
Sophie's Choice was Funnier!
I waited 45mins for a laugh from this film... there was none, so I put on Step Brothers (again).
Moreover, the character of "Reggie" seemed a bit contrived. Discuss.