TIME TRIP!

Episode Four
"O’Shane’s Seven"

By
Gabe Templin and Orlando Segarra

2016 JustPressPlayhouse@gmail.com
 TIME TRIP!
Prologue

SOUND: LABORATORY STUFF

NARRATOR
The Year is 1944. Safe in her top-secret government
lab, Doctor Meira Bitterman reaches out to Private
First Class, Trip Timeskipper, helping him navigate
each strange new world he encounters...
SOUND: BUTTON
BITTERMAN
Ze people of zis timeline clearly have a strange fetish
for obsolete technology. Unfortunately, zhat technology
is in our future, so I can’t be much help to you, Trip.
TRIP
(THROUGH COMMUNICATOR)
Really wish your encyclopedias could travel time too,
doc.
BITTERMAN
Milo! Vhat is ze status of ze Quantum Spanner?

SOUND: BUTTONS
MILO
Any day now.
BITTERMAN
Trip could be killed! He’s going on a suicide mission!
MILO
He always makes it out okay.
BITTERMAN
Yeah, because I help him. Didn’t you hear me? I know
nozhing of zis strange vorld. I’m useless.
MILO
I wouldn’t go that far.

SOUND: DOORBELL
BITTERMAN
Who could zis be at zis hour? Go answer ze door.
MILO
On my way...
SOUND: BUTTON
 2.

BITTERMAN
Trip? How soon before you set off?
TRIP
(CUTTING OUT THROUGH COMMUNICATOR)
We... pork chops... briefing with O’Shane... ready...

BITTERMAN
Sound’s getting vorse. Let’s hope you have one last
jump sequence left.
SOUND: FOOTSTEPS

MILO
Hey, Doctor B, remember that guy who was on the phone
earlier?

BITTERMAN
Ve don’t have time to discuss investing right now,
Milo, tell him to come back vhen Private Timeskipper is
no longer in grave peril!
MILO
Well, he’s already here, so...
JOHNSON
Agent Johnson, ma’am. Just need a moment of your time.
BITTERMAN
Vhat sort of investment is so important it trumps
science?
JOHNSON
Investment? You mean investigation.

BITTERMAN
Investivhaaat...?
MILO
It sounded like investment to me on the phone.

JOHNSON
Lots of money tied up in this operation. A few
unfavorable stories are making the rounds. There’s
growing concern. We got questions.

BITTERMAN
I don’t have to answer anyzing. Zis laboratory operates
on a Need to Know basis.
JOHNSON
Well, I need to know.
 3.

BITTERMAN
Vhat’s your clearance?
JOHNSON
I’m here in an official capacity. U.T.I.
Ten-One-One-One-Four.

BITTERMAN
Under who’s auzhority?
JOHNSON
S.D. Six. Top level.
SOUND: WARNING BEEP
MILO
Uh-oh, looks like the Micronetic Processor is acting up
again.
BITTERMAN
Agent Johnson, believe me, I vould like nozhing more
than to sit and discuss ze peculiarities of ze vork ve
are conducting here. But as you can see, now’s not a
good time.
JOHNSON
Yes. The Timeskipper boy. Where is he now?
BITTERMAN
He’s in... San Francisco, actually. Isn’t zhat right,
Milo?
MILO
Yeah. Totally. San Francisco.

JOHNSON
The boy’s father has been poking around. Can’t say that
I blame him. Nobody’s seen Trip for two days. About the
same time your laboratory suffered an unfortunate
accident, I believe...

BITTERMAN
Yes, it’s true, ve’ve run into a few snags. But I can
assure you, ze lab is up unt running unt everyzing is
totally under control.
SOUND: PANIC ALARM

MILO
There goes the Proton Accelerator.
 4.

JOHNSON
We need proof, not assurances. If people are dying, we
need to know.
BITTERMAN
Haha! Trip isn’t dead, Agent Johnson. Far from it, in
fact.
JOHNSON
How can we be sure?

BITTERMAN
Vell, I mean, you can go ahead and talk vith him
yourself if you vish... Here, I’ll just, press zis
button here...
SOUND: BUTTON

BITTERMAN (cont’d)
...Ah, yes. Here we are. Ahem. Hello, Trip? Yoohoo,
Trip? Zhere, uh, is an Agent Johnson here from ze main
office and, uh, he vants to check in unt make sure
you’re completely safe unt sound... in San Francisco...
1944... safely... Trip? Hellooo? Trip?
JOHNSON
Never trust a kraut to do a patriot’s job. If it were
up to me, you’d all be rounded up and shot.

BITTERMAN
Not ze first time I’ve been zhreatened vith bodily
harm, Agent Johnson, and it von’t be ze last.
JOHNSON
You got two choices. Behind door number one, you speak
to me now, I get my answers, and if I find out
"everyzing is totally under control," then I’ll be on
my way. Behind door number two, you refuse to talk, I
bring you in, and we get our answers one way or
another.

BITTERMAN
Einstein sent you, didn’t he? Miststück. Du Hurensohn.
JOHNSON
Sorry ma’am, I don’t sprechen sie language.

BITTERMAN
Agent Johnson, please. You don’t understand. If ve stop
now ze mission vill be compromised!
 5.

JOHNSON
As far as we’re concerned there is no mission.
BITTERMAN
Vell! As far as I’m concerned, you’re nozhing but a big
arschloch!

JOHNSON
Door number two it is. You two are coming with me.
BITTERMAN
No! No! Unhand me! How DARE you touch me zhere! I am an
scientist! My vork must continue! Trip! Trip! Zhey’re
taking me avay! Trip!
JOHNSON
If I were to guess, I’d say Private Timeskipper is
lying face-down in a ditch somewhere. Ain’t that right,
you dirty Nazi!
BITTERMAN
Vait! No! He’s not dead! He’s safe in San Francisco!
Please, you must let me go. His life is in terrible
danger! I mean, he’s on vacation. No! You don’t
understand, I must SAVE HIM!
SOUND: THEME MUSIC
NARRATOR
Trip may be gone but not for good. His matter flies in
a million pieces, skips through parallel dimensions on
the Quantum plane, and instantly reassembles on the
other side of a wormhole. But where is he? And more
importantly, when is he? Just Press Playhouse proudly
Presents the continuing adventures of Private Trip
Timeskipper in... TIME TRIP!
SOUND: THEME MUSIC CONTINUES
NARRATOR (cont’d)
Previously, on Time Trip...

SOUND: CLIPS FROM THE PREVIOUS SHOW

NARRATOR (cont’d)
This week’s episode: O’Shane’s Seven.
 6.

Scene 1: Tunnel in Bartsville

NARRATOR
Deep in the tunnels of Bartsville, our heroes make
final preparations to storm the surface and shut down
the signal...
SOUND: BUTTON
TRIP
Doctor Bitterman? Doctor Bitterman? Come in.

HARRY
Trouble with the anomaly?
TRIP
The battery meter keeps fluctuating. I can’t get
through.
HARRY
Here, lemme take a look.
SOUND: TRIP HANDS HARRY WATCH

SOUND: HARRY TINKERING

TRIP
If I don’t find a way to charge it up soon I’m in big
trouble.

HARRY
Better keep that to yourself, these people think you’re
the messiah.
TRIP
Why did you design the signal?
SOUND: HARRY SCOFFS SARCASTICALLY
HARRY
Uh. For the ladies?

TRIP
It was before the upheaval, right?
HARRY
Obviously, I had no idea they were going to use it as a
mind-control device. The Elders commissioned it, I
built it, then the surfers took it over. Somehow that’s
all my fault.
 7.

TRIP
How long have you been on the surface?
HARRY
Long enough to know things aren’t always what they
seem.

SOUND: GENERAL JOCK-ISH LOCKER ROOM ATMOSPHERE

DE SOUZA
Man, I can’t wait to bag me some zapper scum, man. Show
’em what we undies are made of, man. Yeah! Let’s do
this!
DEVILANNE
I’m sure they’d love to see what your insides are made
of, De Souza.

DE SOUZA
Well... You already know what I’m made of, don’tcha,
Devilanne?
DEVILANNE
Ugh. Don’t make shoot you.
DE SOUZA
Hey, how come none of the other guards are coming with
us?

DEVILANNE
Someone has to stay behind and look after your wife.
SOUND: LAUGHTER
DE SOUZA
That’s not funny. You don’t think? Her and the guards?
DEVILANNE
Relax. I’m busting your chops.
DE SOUZA
Yeah, yeah, let’s all have a laugh. Would be nice if
the anomaly said something inspiring. I mean, what’s
the deal, is she asleep?
SOUND: FOOTSTEPS ENTERING

O’SHANE
The anomaly will reveal herself at the appropriate
time, soldier.
 8.

DE SOUZA
Sir, yessir!

O’SHANE
At ease.
DEVILANNE
(ASIDE)
Oh god, look what they did to Freckles.

BONES
(ASIDE)
The po’ kid! They worked him over good.
SOUND: SIX-THREE-EIGHT SNIFFLING AND SHUDDERING

O’SHANE
(TO THE GROUP)
We are the lucky Seven. You are here because I chose
you. You all have a job, and we have one mission: to
detach, disengage, and destroy the signal. Many dangers
lie in our way but rest assured, our success has been
foretold by The Oracle. They’ll greet us with a hero’s
banquet upon our return.
HARRY
IF we return.

O’SHANE
During our interrogation of Zapper Six-Three-Eight we
patched together a rough map of The Pyramid. On the
wall, please!

SOUND: MECHANICAL WHIRRING

O’SHANE (cont’d)
Unfortunately, there’s no way of verifying the accuracy
of this information until we’re on the inside, but here
is the basic layout of the pyramid’s main lobby. And
here is the blockade on Clay street. We’ll come up
Embarcadero, and penetrate it from the south.
HARRY
There’s growing concern I may not be qualified to
undertake this mission.

O’SHANE
Well, we need you to deactivate the signal, so you’re
coming.
DEVILANNE
What have you got to worry about? We have plenty of
grenades.
 9.

HARRY
Grenades won’t mean a thing against those zappers.
BONES
Now we got a zapgun too. D’ boy won’t be needin’ his.

TRIP
We have the element of surprise. Catch them with their
pants down, blitz the crap out of them. Some air
support would be nice, though.

DEVILANNE
Nothing’s flown our skies in fifty years.
HARRY
You’re all the support we got, killer.

TRIP
Gee. Thanks.
O’SHANE
There is an elevator shaft on the east side and a
stairwell on the west. We’ve been informed there are
sentry posts all along the stairs, so we have no choice
but to punch through. This will be A: Very hard, and B:
Very dangerous. We will suffer casualties. There’s no
way to avoid this. Unless...
DE SOUZA
Unless what? Is there another way up there?
DEVILANNE
Bring ’em some flowers, make a few kissy faces, and
they might let you through, De Souza.

SOUND: LAUGHTER
O’SHANE
Yes, there is another way. However, it’s gonna be
tough.

DE SOUZA
We can do it, O’Shane. No problem. You can count on us.
What is it?
O’SHANE
We take the elevator.

BONES
Poo-ye-yi! This plan is odorous.
 10.

DEVILANNE
How are we supposed to do that, exactly? It’s not like
we can press a button and expect one to appear. Those
elevators haven’t worked in decades. And besides, the
pyramid is leaning-

O’SHANE
-leaning up against the ’scraper behind it on
Montgomery. Yes, you’re right, Devilanne, the elevators
won’t be operational. But, we don’t need them to be.
Visual estimates place the angle of the Pyramid at
roughly fifty-nine degrees. Once we enter the lobby the
elevators are directly to our right. We can jam the
doors open, and climb the shaft. All we need is a
little rope and a lot of luck.
TRIP
How far do we have to go?
O’SHANE
All the way to the top. The signal broadcasts out of a
conference room on the forty-eighth floor.

TRIP
Will there be zappers up there?
O’SHANE
Yes. They’ll be all over the place. Because of their
One Mind, they’ll be ready for us the second they spot
us at the blockade.
TRIP
So we’re shooting our way in AND out?

O’SHANE
Not necessarily. Interior routes will be crawling with
the enemy, but I believe we’ve found an alternative...
Show ’em, boys.
SOUND: UNPACKAGING AND UNFURLING

SOUND: GASPS
O’SHANE (cont’d)
Found these parachutes near the airport. Been saving
them for a special occasion.

HARRY
(ASIDE)
We’re screwed.
 11.

DEVILANNE
For once I agree with you.

O’SHANE
Any questions? Good. We leave in one hour. Good luck.
SOUND: GATHERING EQUIPMENT
DEVILANNE
C’mon Bones, let’s check out our new death-shrouds,
shall we?
BONES
Hey, that’s not funny. You know I have a touch of d’
vertigo.

DEVILANNE
Yeah, yeah, you big baby.
SOUND: FOOTSTEPS WALKING AWAY

HARRY
What are you thinking, killer?
TRIP
I’m thinking I should’ve specialized as a paratrooper.

HARRY
Would sure love to hear your master plan if you’ve got
one.
TRIP
Oh, I have a plan alright, I’m just making it up as I
go.
HARRY
If we find your crystal, you can power the watch,
right? You could use that to get us outta there, right?

TRIP
I hope so. I’m not sure. Doctor Bitterman would know
what to do.
HARRY
But you can’t get through to her.
TRIP
No. I can’t. I think the watch is dead.
HARRY
I’d like to introduce you to a coupla friends of mine,
Cut and Run.
SOUND: TRANSITION MUSIC
 12.

Scene 2: The Streets of Cisco

SOUND: FOOTSTEPS ON RUINED SURFACE
SOUND: FLYING MOTOR HUMMING IN THE DISTANCE

SOUND: DETECTOR WHIRRING

HARRY
Vicinity scans negative for zappers.
SOUND: DE SOUZA INHALES DEEPLY

DE SOUZA
Nothing like the warm Cisco air. God, I love the
stench.

BONES
Smell a bit like you, Harry.
HARRY
Harty-har-har.

O’SHANE
We should reach the blockade just before sunrise.
DEVILANNE
Anyone else think it’s kinda quiet around here...?

SIX-THREE-EIGHT
P-please. Let me go. I can’t go back. I can’t.
DE SOUZA
Shut up, zap boy. Or, do you need a little
encouragement?

SOUND: SLAP TO THE HEAD

BONES
Hey, leave d’ kid alone. We’ve done ’nuff mal to d’ po’
boy.

O’SHANE
He’s only here to verify the map. Any surprises and
he’s dead.
HARRY
Well, all this yammering ain’t gonna get us noticed. I
needa take a leak.
SOUND: DEVILANNE WHISTLES
 13.

DEVILANNE
Hold it! ...Where do you think you’re going?
HARRY
To the little boy’s room. What’s it to ya?

DEVILANNE
I don’t trust you. I’m coming along.
HARRY
Wanna hold my hand? I have a shy bladder. This is
highly irregular.
DEVILANNE
Try anything funny and you’ll see how irregular I can
get.

O’SHANE
Be quick about it!
SOUND: FOOTSTEPS
DE SOUZA
Old fool. We don’t have time for breaks.
BONES
You rather he wet hisself? Give d’ man a minute.
DE SOUZA
We could all be dead in a minute.
BONES
Then I guess you best be off keepin’ an eye out fer
trouble.

TRIP
Devilanne doesn’t care much for Harry, does she?
BONES
How would you feel ’bout d’ man that caused yo parents
death?

TRIP
Is that why he was banished?
BONES
Devilanne’s folks were First Elders. Her father was
avocat, her momma sat on the council. Befo’ d’
upheaval, Harry and them be closer than a coupla warts
on a frog. Then one day, he... look, kid, maybe it be
best if he told you hisself.
SOUND: YELLING IN THE DISTANCE
 14.

DE SOUZA
The hell is that??
TRIP
Sounds like trouble.

SOUND: GUNSHOTS AND ZAPS

DEVILANNE
(FROM A DISTANCE)
RUUUUN!!

SOUND: LASER BLAST

SOUND: RUNNING
TRIP
What’s going on?
HARRY
Zappers! They’re right on our tail!
SOUND: ZAP!

O’SHANE
It’s an ambush, everybody take cover!
SOUND: TRANSITION MUSIC

Commercial
NEBULOUS VOICE
(A LA JONY IVE)
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TULLAH
I’m under your wrist, sugar!

NEBULOUS VOICE
It’s your time, use it as you see fit. iWatch, by Opal.
Technology for life.
 15.

Scene 3: The Blockade

NARRATOR
Trip and his companions find themselves amidst a deadly
zapper ambush...

SOUND: CROSSFIRE OF GUNSHOTS AND ZAPS THROUGHOUT SCENE

TRIP
Hold it right there!

BONES
They all over the place!
DE SOUZA
We’re gonna die here.

BONES
Watch yo back, De Souza! This ain’t no time fo’ a
mental breakdown!
SIX-THREE-EIGHT
Help! Help! They’re coming for me!

BONES
Merde. I missed.
TRIP
Got him!

BONES AND SIX-THREE-EIGHT

Thanks.
DEVILANNE
They must’ve known we were coming.

TRIP
How?
HARRY
Spiders have eyes all over, Killer.
DEVILANNE
Grenades!
TRIP
On it.
SOUND: PIN DROP
 16.

BONES
Look, there be d’ blockade! We made it!
DE SOUZA
Ahhhh! Die Zapper scum!

SOUND: GRENADE EXPLODES

O’SHANE
Where are the guards?

DEVILANNE
The gate’s open.
HARRY
Well, what are we waiting for? Let’s go!

SOUND: RUNNING
O’SHANE
Close the gate!
SOUND: GATES CLOSING

SOUND: CROSSFIRE CEASES

BONES
All clear!

TRIP
Clear!
SOUND: HEAVY PANTING
DEVILANNE
You see ’em?
O’SHANE
It’s too dark. They stopped shooting.
TRIP
There’s no one here. The blockade’s deserted.
BONES
I gotta bad feelin’ ’bout this.
O’SHANE
You got anything?
DEVILANNE
Nothing. Whatever it is they’re planning must be big.
 17.

DE SOUZA
We’re dead! All of us! Dead!
DEVILANNE
Do something useful and check for explosives, will ya?

O’SHANE
Damn surfers! What do they want from us?
TRIP
We’re trapped behind the gate. Only way out is into the
pyramid.
DEVILANNE
This doesn’t make any sense, it’s like they’re leading
us in.

O’SHANE
Or lying in wait.
TRIP
Where are they?

SIX-THREE-EIGHT
Look. Behind the glass. In the lobby.
HARRY
...Dear god.

BONES
They just standin’ still... like statues.
DEVILANNE
What do we do?

O’SHANE
...we take the bait.
SOUND: TRANSITION MUSIC
Scene 4: Pyramid Lobby

SOUND: LOBBY DOORS

SOUND: FOOTSTEPS
DE SOUZA
This is a trap.
BONES
It no trap. It a nightmare.
 18.

DEVILANNE
Lifeless eyes. Black eyes.
HARRY
Like a doll’s eyes.

DE SOUZA
This is a trap.
HARRY
Hey! Hey! Buddy! Hello! Anyone home in there?
...Nothing. It’s like they’re powered off or something.
SIX-THREE-EIGHT
The Man wants us here.
SOUND: ZAPPER FEET SHIFTING

DE SOUZA
This is it! They’re gonna get us! We’re done for!
TRIP
No, wait, look. They’re opening up a path to that door.

SOUND: FOOTSTEPS
O’SHANE
They want us to take the stairs.

DE SOUZA
I gotta get outta here, man. I got a wife. They’re
gonna kill us!
BONES
YOU gotta get out?? I got a wife and a kid!

DEVILANNE
So what do you say, boss? Take the bait again?
O’SHANE
...We climb.

SOUND: TRANSITION MUSIC (FUTURISTIC ELEVATOR MUZAK?)

Scene 5: The Staircase
SOUND: FOOTSTEPS CLIMBING STAIRS

DEVILANNE
No problem crossing any of the abandoned sentry posts
so far.
 19.

BONES
D’ silence is makin’ me head pound.
DEVILANNE
Keep it together, Bones, I need you.

BONES
Not a worry, mon cher, I ain’t gone nowhere.
DE SOUZA
(WHIMPERING TO HIMSELF)
Oh, crap... Oh, crap... Oh, crap... Oh, crap...
BONES
Can’t say d’ same for De Souza. Sounds like he in la-la
land.

HARRY
How much further?
O’SHANE
(CATCHING HIS BREATH)
We’re on the forty-fifth.

DE SOUZA
...Oh, crap... oh, crap... oh, crap... oh, crap...
BONES
Keep ya cool, man! Ya makin’ me nervous!

DEVILANNE
Hey, Freckles. Have any idea what The Man’s got up his
sleeve?
SIX-THREE-EIGHT
I don’t know. I’ve never been up inside the broadcast
room.
DE SOUZA
...Oh, crap... oh, crap... oh, crap... oh, crap...

BONES
De Souza! Shut. Up.
SOUND: COMMOTION AND STRUGGLE
TRIP
Look out!
DE SOUZA
The kid took my gun!
 20.

DEVILANNE
Bones!
SOUND: GUNSHOT
BONES
Ah! Me arm!
SIX-THREE-EIGHT
Alright, stand back, all of you! Not another step!

O’SHANE
You little runt. Did The Man put you up to this?
SIX-THREE-EIGHT
No. I won’t be a part of his One Mind. But I won’t have
anything to do with you either! I’m not going up there.

TRIP
Nice and easy now.
HARRY
Don’t be stupid, kid.

SIX-THREE-EIGHT
Surfers and Undies are all the same. You followed your
Attorney up here to get killed. Why don’t you think for
yourselves?!

BONES
We on yo side, kid.
SIX-THREE-EIGHT
You’re just saying that because you’re afraid.

O’SHANE
The only way to ensure free choice is to destroy the
signal!
SIX-THREE-EIGHT
N-no it’s not. You think it is because you see the
signal as power. But it’s not. Power isn’t freedom.
Down in Bartsville you’re safe. You’re SAFE! You could
be happy if you wanted! But you just want more power.
You made up some stupid oracle to justify control of
your own people. How is your oracle any different from
our signal?
O’SHANE
The oracle shows us how to be free. The I, Watch can
terminate the broadcasting license.
 21.

SIX-THREE-EIGHT
I’ve been to Union Square. Where your elders found the
oracle. Underneath the Sign of the Fruit. Beneath the
main level. You know what I saw? An entire room full of
oracles. It’s not some magical device from our past. It
counts how many steps you take in a day! It sends you
weather updates! It’s nothing but a toy!
DEVILANNE
What’s he talking about, O’Shane?

O’SHANE
Lies. Indoctrination from The Man Upstairs.
HARRY
The boy’s right. I’ve seen it too. Boxes of them, just
like he said.

O’SHANE
That’s not true. That’s impossible.
SIX-THREE-EIGHT
I can’t take it anymore. There’s more to this world
than this crummy city. I-I’m not dying here for you.
Y-you can go ahead and take your precious signal. I’ve
made my choice. I’m leaving.
SOUND: TENTATIVE FOOTSTEPS

O’SHANE
It can’t be. It’s not true. You’re lying.
DE SOUZA
Are we just going to let him walk out?

O’SHANE
...you LIAR!
TRIP
O’Shane, don’t!

SOUND: GUNSHOTS
DEVILANNE
Freckles!
SOUND: THUD

O’SHANE
You mustn’t tell lies.
 22.

DEVILANNE
You killed him. I can’t believe you killed him!
O’SHANE
He had a gun. He was going to kill us. You saw him.

DEVILANNE
You killed Freckles. He was just a kid!
O’SHANE
His lies-

HARRY
-Not cool, Danny.
O’SHANE
All his lies. All of them. Lies. My head. I can’t think
straight.
DEVILANNE
How could you??
O’SHANE
I had to. I have to destroy the signal. It’s the only
way. I had to do it. I had to. Trip, give me the
anomaly.
TRIP
O’Shane, think about what you’re doing.

DEVILANNE
You KILLED HIM!
SOUND: BONES HOLDS DEVILANNE BACK

BONES
Devilanne, no. Don’t provoke him.
O’SHANE
Now, you all listen and you listen well. I’m in charge
here. I’m your attorney, dammit! The anomaly is mine,
it belongs to me! I’m going to stop the signal. I’m
going to save the world myself.
HARRY
Danny, this is insane.

O’SHANE
Is it? Or is that what a Surfer piece of crap scum
traitor such as yourself would have me believe. That’s
it, isn’t it? The signal’s gotten inside you all! I’m
the only sane one left.
 23.

TRIP
Listen to yourself, O’Shane. You’re not making any
sense.
O’SHANE
Give. Me. The. Watch. Now!
SOUND: GUNSHOT INTO CEILING
O’SHANE (cont’d)
I’m going to count to three. There will not be a four.
One...
SOUND: CLICK OF GUN HAMMER BEING PULLED BACK
O’SHANE (cont’d)
...two...

SOUND: DISTANT RUMBLE OF RUNNING AND VOICES

DE SOUZA
W-what’s that??

SOUND: RUNNING AND VOICES GETTING CLOSER

DEVILANNE
Zappers. All of them. Coming up fast.
SOUND: A STRUGGLE

TRIP
O’Shane! No! Stop! You don’t know what you’re doing!
O’SHANE
A-ha! I got it! The watch is mine!

SOUND: ZAPPERS CLOSING IN

O’SHANE (cont’d)
Stay back, all of you! Don’t you dare come after me.

DEVILANNE
O’Shane, you can’t do this to us!
O’SHANE
We all have to make sacrifices in the name of freedom.
Goodbye.

SOUND: RUNNING UP THE STAIRS

 24.

DEVILANNE
O’Shane!
SOUND: ZAP!
HARRY
We got company! Run!
SOUND: CROSSFIRE OF GUNSHOTS AND ZAPS THROUGHOUT SCENE
DEVILANNE
De Souza! Look out!
DE SOUZA
Gaaaahhhhh!!!! They got me!!!! No! Please! Don’t zap
me! No!

SOUND: ZAP!
DEVILANNE
Damn.
SOUND: RUNNING UPSTAIRS

BONES
I can’t shoot straight wit this arm.
DEVILANNE
Get behind me, Bones!

TRIP
They’re bottlenecking themselves.
HARRY
We made it! Forty-eighth.

SOUND: TRYING DOOR

HARRY (cont’d)
He locked it from the inside.

DEVILANNE
Can you open it?
HARRY
Gimme a minute, gimme a minute...

SOUND: JIGGING LOCK

BONES
We don’t got a minute!
 25.

HARRY
Almost there...

SOUND: DOOR UNLOCKS

HARRY (cont’d)
Aha! Got it!
DEVILANNE
Everybody get in!
Scene 6: The 48th Floor
SOUND: ZAPPERS IN THE STAIRWELL

SOUND: DOOR SLAMMING

SOUND: CROSSFIRE CEASES
DEVILANNE
We need something to keep the door shut!

TRIP
Help me move this table...
SOUND: TABLE SLIDING AGAINST FLOOR

HARRY
This ain’t gonna keep ’em out for long.
SOUND: ZAPPERS AGAINST DOOR FROM OUTSIDE
TRIP
We just need to keep them out long enough.
BONES
Poo-ye-yi. Me vertigo’s actin’ up!
DEVILANNE
Don’t look out the window, dummy. Shh! Listen. What’s
that?
SOUND: ELECTRONIC DISPLAY HUMMING
ELDERWOMAN
...here in the Upstairs Observatory.....
DEVILANNE
...Momma? Momma!
ELDERWOMAN
...Good luck, and may the Oracle bless you all.
SOUND: DISPLAY SHUTS OFF
 26.

DEVILANNE
Where’d she go? Bring her back!
TRIP
O’Shane. What’s going on? What was that?

SOUND: O’SHANE LAUGHS, DERANGED

HARRY
Where’s the program module?

DEVILANNE
O’Shane, that was my mother, wasn’t it?
SOUND: O’SHANE CALMS DOWN
O’SHANE
They fooled us, Devilanne. All this time.
DEVILANNE
Why was my mother up on that screen?
SOUND: O’SHANE RESUMES DERANGED LAUGHTER

TRIP
What about the crystal?
O’SHANE
Crystal? Crystal?? You want your crystal? Here. Here’s
your crystal.
SOUND: BUTTON
O’SHANE (cont’d)
See for yourself.

SOUND: ELECTRONIC DISPLAY CLICKS ON

ELDERWOMAN
These are the minutes from the final Council of Elders.
I, Crystalline Hicks, Elderwoman of Cisco, leave behind
this message in hopes that one day our children will
understand why we split the Surface from the
Underground. Following The Great Quake, our people were
left homeless and destitute. With nothing left to live
for, an epidemic of Suicide ravaged our kind. This
despair required an antidote, and through the signal,
we’ve achieved balance once more. We restored purpose.
Separating our people into two opposing classes induces
the competition required for our species to survive.
This deception is necessary to keep balance. You see, a
person cannot live without purpose. The myth of the
Oracle completes us. This is the way of it. Do not
(MORE)
 27.

ELDERWOMAN (cont’d)
abandon hope. Humanity’s best days are still ahead, all
thanks to the Men AND Women Upstairs. Good luck, and
may the Oracle bless you all.

SOUND: DISPLAY SHUTS OFF

DEVILANNE
That’s it? Bring her back. Momma! Momma!
O’SHANE
That’s all there is. No Man Upstairs. No crystal. No
Oracle. Here, you can have your broken watch back.
SOUND: O’SHANE TOSSES TRIP THE WATCH
TRIP
We came all this way for nothing. I’m stuck here.
HARRY
I may not be able to stop the signal... but maybe...
SOUND: HARRY TYPING ON KEYBOARD

TRIP
I’m never going back. So many things left unsaid.
BONES
Now, now, what a ting to say. Don’t ya worry yourself
none, Trip. In d’ end, all ya got is hope. Long as ya
got that ya got purpose. You’ll make it back home
someday. Jus’ you wait.
DEVILANNE
Well, what now? There’s only one way outta here-

SOUND: STAIRCASE DOOR CRASHES DOWN

BONES
Zappers! They broke through d’ door!

SOUND: CROSSFIRE OF GUNSHOTS AND ZAPS THROUGHOUT SCENE

DEVILANNE
Take cover and blast ’em!
TRIP
Harry, what are you doing?
HARRY
I may be able to reprogram the signal.
 28.

DEVILANNE
Get your chutes ready! Looks like we’ll have to jump
for it. Shoot out the windows!
SOUND: GLASS SHATTERING

BONES
Lord have mercy! My vertigo!
DEVILANNE
Just close your eyes and pull the cord! Easy peasy.

HARRY
Aw, crap... what was the password, again?
TRIP
Die, you Zapholes!

DEVILANNE
O’Shane, what’re you doing with those grenades??
O’SHANE
A reading from The Oracle: "I, watch...

DEVILANNE
O’Shane, no! Don’t do it! Harry, hurry up!
BONES
I’m running low! They keep spillin’ through!

O’SHANE
"...User Terms of Agreement..."
HARRY
I’m in! Just a few more seconds...

BONES
O’Shane, get back here, ya fool! Yer gonna get us all
killed!
O’SHANE
"...Article 6. Termination...."
TRIP
Harry!!! Let’s Go!

O’SHANE
"...The License is effective until terminated!"
SOUND: PINS DROP
 29.

DEVILANNE
Everybody take cover!!!!
SOUND: GRENADES EXPLODING

BONES
Pic kee toi! O’Shane blew hisself up!
SOUND: ZAPPERS CONTINUE TO SPILL IN
TRIP
There’s more zappers! Harry, you okay??
HARRY
Just gotta... press one more... button...
SOUND: KEYSTROKE

SOUND: ELECTRICAL ENERGY BUILDS UP AND CRACKLES

BONES
This don’ look too good!

SOUND: ZAPPERS SCREAMING AND FALLING

DEVILANNE
Zappers down! Zappers down! Harry, It worked!
HARRY
Ha-ha! I gave ’em all splitting headaches.
SOUND: WHOOSH
HARRY (cont’d)
Killer, look! Your watch! It’s lighting up!

SOUND: MAGNETIC DISTURBANCE

TRIP
Holy crap. Harry, you must’ve set it off when you
switched the signal! I can feel it... it’s working!

SOUND: METAL CREAKING AND SWAYING

HARRY
You’re doing it, killer! Ha ha! The pyramid! It’s
collapsing!

TRIP
I can feel... I can feel... EVERYTHING!!!!
SOUND: ZWIP!
 30.

BONES
My eye! Where’d he go? We didn’t even get a chance to
say goodbye.
HARRY
In all my years... The prophecy was right all along! He
was our hope. Our salvation. The anomaly. Oracle be
praised!
SOUND: PYRAMID CRASHING
SOUND: DEVILANNE WHISTLES

DEVILANNE
Oh, boys! We gotta jump now if we wanna stay alive!
C’mon!

SOUND: RUNNING AND SCREAMING

BONES
Poo-ye-yi!!!!!!!!!!!
(VOICE FADES AS HE FALLS)

SOUND: THE PYRAMID EXPLODES AND CRUMBLES TO THE GROUND

Epilogue
NARRATOR
And so, Harry, Devilanne, and Bones floated safely down
to Bartsville, where their faith was rewarded with a
hero’s banquet. As for Trip? Well, he’s still out there
somewhere, tripping through time...
SOUND: RAINFOREST AND THUNDERSTORM SOUNDS FADE IN

SOUND: TRIP GROANING AS HE WAKES

TRIP
Ugh. Great. Rain. Mud. Geez... at least I landed
somewhere soft this time...

SOUND: QUICKSAND BURPING

TRIP (cont’d)
Aw, what now? Quicksand?? ...Oh, boy.
SOUND: THEME MUSIC

NARRATOR
We hope you have enjoyed O’Shane’s Seven. We’ll see you
next time for... Lost Amazonia. This has been another
exciting episode of... TIME TRIP, the Continuing
Adventures of Private Trip Timeskipper! From all of us
(MORE)
 31.

NARRATOR (cont’d)
here at Just Press Playhouse, so long, and happy
adventures!
The End