Fluid Parenting Practices, Edited by F.J. Green and M
Fluid Parenting Practices, Edited by F.J. Green and M
Fluid Parenting Practices, Edited by F.J. Green and M
http://dspace.flinders.edu.au/dspace/
Damien W. Riggs
This is an Author Accepted Manuscript of a book chapter published in Fiona J. Green and May
Friedman (Eds.) Chasing rainbows: Exploring gender fluid parenting practices. Copyright
Demeter Press.
Introduction
Since reports of Thomas Beatie’s pregnancy appeared in the media in 2008, the visibility
of transgender men having children post-transition has increased considerably. Whilst this
visibility, it may be argued, has attracted negative attention to transgender men who choose to
bear a child (and transgender men more broadly), it may also be argued that representations of
transgender men bearing children have usefully drawn attention to the complex negotiations that
transgender men undertake in having children. At the heart of these negotiations lies what is
often framed as a competition between transgender men’s masculinity, and their undertaking of a
role historically undertaken by people who identify as women (i.e., child bearing). Yet what is
transition, is that they are very much men, even if their masculinity is placed in question by a
The present chapter takes transgender men’s self-representations as its starting place in
seeking to elaborate how such men reconcile their masculinity with child bearing. In so doing,
1
the chapter seeks to bring the social scientific literature about transgender men who bear children
post-transition together with the public self-representations of such men in order to begin the
work of mapping out the unique experiences of men who undertake a pregnancy. Whilst
transgender men become parents in a multitude of ways (i.e., when still living as their natally-
assigned sex, through their partners bearing children, and through forms of non-genetically
related kinship such as adoption), it is argued here that, given the non-normative account of
masculinity that is produced by transgender men who bear children, this specific mode of family
formation requires closer attention. In the following sections the chapter first outlines the two
main challenges expressed by transgender men who bear children in previous social scientific
research, before going on to explore how transgender men who bear children account for their
masculinity and pregnancies to the media. Exploring public representations of men who
undertake a pregnancy are important for the ways in which they both highlight and discount the
alleged dissonance that is thought to exist in the case of transgender men who bear children, as
gender identities. In those cases, the perceived incongruence comes only from
knowing the history of that individual’s body. Other bodies, however, have
with penises for some, male chests with vaginas for others – that produce a
dissonance. (This dissonance, to be clear, belongs not to the trans body but to
As Currah suggests, many transgender people are able to live their lives without other
2
people knowing their transgender status. Transgender men who bear children, by contrast, are a
priori treated as bodies requiring an explanation. That such men are faced with an injunction to
explain their masculine embodiment is, as Currah so rightly points out, very much a product of
cisgender bodily norms. Yet understanding how transgender men account for their embodied
experiences is nonetheless important for offering guidance to those who engage with transgender
men who bear children, in addition to recognizing the experiences of transgender men
themselves.
Previous Research
There has to date been very little research undertaken with transgender men who bear
children post-transition. This may be for any number of reasons, but likely includes 1) the
relative recency of public awareness about transgender men bearing children (and this includes
awareness amongst transgender men that this is an option), 2) the willingness (or otherwise) of
transgender men to speak publically about their pregnancies, and 3) the relative infancy of non-
pathologising transgender studies. The research that does exist suggests two main areas where
transgender men who bear children must negotiate issues associated with their embodied
Pregnancy
Pregnancy brings with it for transgender men two challenges that are primarily the
product of the normative assumption that only women carry children. The first of these relates to
how transgender men understand themselves as men whilst they are pregnant. Previous research
suggests that some transgender men reconcile their pregnancies through the notion of simply
3
being a ‘host’ for the child. Thus as one participant in More’s research suggested: “I didn't regard
the unborn child as a part of my person, rather as a guest” (Matt in More 321). Making a
distinction between the unborn child and themselves, it would appear, allows some transgender
men to maintain a line between the role their body is playing, and their identity as a man.
The second challenge faced by transgender men in terms of carrying a child is in regards to
Sitting in the docs office who delivered me, and my mom, and Zac was also
Here Del speaks of how engaging with doctors forcibly brought him back into his own
body, one normatively marked by the medical profession and society more broadly as female by
Ryan’s research with transgender men who bear children post-transition, however,
suggests that “[Men who had born a child] conceptualized themselves as men who had the
constructs transgender men who bear children as unique men, rather than as men with female
bodies. This, it could be argued, provides an important counter to the challenges experienced by
Breastfeeding
Once transgender men have given birth, a subsequent challenge identified in previous
research is breastfeeding. Interestingly, previous research suggests that transgender men adopt a
4
pragmatic or utilitarian approach to breastfeeding, where breastfeeding is seen as serving a
purpose (and thus that breasts have some use). Participants in Rubin’s research suggested that,
for them, breastfeeding was the only time in which their breasts did not seem like an unwanted
part of their body (as they were serving a purpose), a point also made by one of More’s
participants:
When I was alone I had no problems breastfeeding, it was very natural, animal-
like. But when company was present they related to me as female, even when they
As Matt suggests, breastfeeding was fine unless it involved company, in which case, like
the previous example from Del, Matt is forced back into a body that is treated as female, rather
than simply a unique male body. Yet despite the challenge presented by other people’s views of
their bodies, More suggests that in general her participants, when viewing breastfeeding as a
This section reports on five instances where transgender men have spoken publically
about their experiences of pregnancy. These instances were identified through a Google search
for the key terms ‘transgender pregnancy’, ‘trans man parent’, ‘transgender parenting’, and ‘trans
father’. It is of course recognized that, as with any media report, only particular questions are
likely to have been asked, and the framing of media reports typically aims to generate reader
interest through sensationalism. Nonetheless, in the documentaries, news reports, and blogs
examined here, it can be argued that much of what appears are transgender men’s own accounts
5
of their pregnancies, accounts that very much echo what is found in previous research.
In terms of carrying a child, some of the self-representations identified repeated the idea
I’ve never felt like his mother. I breast fed for 11, almost 12 months of his first
year, but as far as a mother I don't feel like it, I just feel like wow, guys can have
“It really didn't occur to me that [the pregnancy] was actually happening to me. It
was me looking at this another person being pregnant. It was like handling it by
Whilst it could be argued that in some instances such distancing rhetoric may place some
transgender men at risk for not addressing pregnancy-related issues (i.e., by ignoring
physiological responses), this did not appear in any of the self-representations examined. Rather,
the men appeared to use distancing techniques to cordon off certain aspects of the pregnancy
from their identity as men. In other words, they very much considered themselves as responsible
for the pregnancy, yet the pregnancy was not their own per se.
written by Trevor McDonald, who writes explicitly as a transgender man who breastfed the child
The word "breastfeeding" doesn't bother me. Both men and women have breast
tissue and can, unfortunately, get breast cancer. We all have nipples and breasts,
6
Here McDonald clearly orientates to an account of breastfeeding premised upon utility:
that breastfeeding doesn't compromise his masculinity, as ‘breasts’ are not gender specific, and
as he argues more broadly throughout the blog, he believes breastfeeding is important for babies
As was the case with previous research, some men identified challenges that arose from
[Ontario Heath Insurance Policy] card at any medical visit. The ‘F’ on the card
miraculously erases any existing effects of testosterone, top surgery, dress, and
receptionist at the intake desk simply following the silent directive printed on my
OHIP card, and told me ‘Miss, there is a long wait today so go with the technician
to get changed and then have a seat with the other women at the end of the hall’
(Ware 69).
This example highlights the fact that regardless of transgender men’s own negotiations of
masculinity in the context of pregnancy, they must also contend with how other people treat
them (and indeed misgender them). This point is of particular note given that the issue raised by
Ware is not necessarily transphobia per se (though this is not to say that transgender men who
bear children do not encounter explicit transphobia from health care professionals), but rather
that the mundane imposition of gender norms upon transgender men can exacerbate the
theme in the self-representations examined here was a sense that pregnancy allowed transgender
7
men to view their bodies as having a purpose, as Moore elaborates:
I really do think that I was lucky to be able to carry Miles. I think, for the longest
time my body, and being transgendered, was such a negative thing for me, and
made me so uncomfortable. And even though the process of being pregnant and
giving birth isn’t the most comfortable thing, it made me appreciate what I have
more, and realize that even though it’s not the ideal of what I’d like to be, it’s still
beautiful” (Moore).
Echoing a point made by Ryan in previous research, then, Moore’s account of his
pregnancy emphasizes that the unique experience of being a pregnant man in some ways
counteracts the marginalizing and for many people distressing experience of living in a body that
does not match with their identity. A similar claim was made by two participants in the
documentary TransParent, who suggest “That time during the pregnancy was the only time,
absolutely the only time I felt right being in a female body” (Alex in Rosskam) and “That’s the
only time in my whole life I’ve felt right in my body. When I was pregnant and nursing for
almost nine months, my body was doing what it was supposed to be doing, it was doing it by
itself, and it felt absolutely right” (Joey in Rosskam). This logic of pregnancy paradoxically
contributing to, rather than undermining, a stable trans masculine identity, is highlighted in the
How does it feel to be a pregnant man? Incredible. Despite the fact that my belly
is growing with a new life inside me, I am stable and confident being the man that
What it appears pregnancy does for some transgender men, then, is rather than making
8
them feel less like men, instead vindicates for them that they are men precisely because they
Conclusion
Of course the final point made in the above analysis begs the question of whether
transgender men’s accounts of pregnancy are always already reliant upon a normative binary of
what a woman is and what a man is, and the role that each is expected to play. Halberstam
Beatie, as many of the stories about him confirm, was a beauty pageant
uncomfortable place for him to find himself. He dealt well with the glare of the
cameras in general, but, rather than promoting a queer narrative about difference
and gender shifts, his story ultimately came to rest upon an all too familiar
human to want to give birth. The Beaties just wanted, in other words, what
extra cash, and some publicity to boot. Beatie’s very public pregnancy certainly
afforded him and his family a nice slice of fame and fortune, but we would be
very mistaken if we imagined that any political agenda had been advanced by the
smiling, comforting image of the male Madonna, cradling his full belly and
assuring U.S. viewers that everything is still in its right place (78).
At the same time, however, this chapter highlights the fact that it is indeed possible for
9
pregnancy to be detached from its normative relationship to particular embodied identities (i.e.,
female), and to instead reconceptualise pregnancy as a role that can be fulfilled by any embodied
identity (albeit one that occupies a body capable of bearing a child). What the men reported here
are negotiating, then, is a script for being a father in a society that does not view fathers as child
bearers, and moreover that labels particular behaviours as maternal (i.e., child bearing,
breastfeeding) and others as paternal (i.e., everything that the maternal is not).
As such, the transgender men whose self-representations appear in this chapter engage
with the central question addressed by Doucet in her book-length study on whether or not men
who are primary parents mother or indeed become mothers. Whilst Doucet’s research focused on
cisgendered men, the findings are arguably applicable to transgender men as well, namely that
given all of the attributions made about the category ‘mother’ (which is tightly regulated in
relation to gender norms), men (cisgendered or transgendered) cannot be mothers. That some
men do bear children, then, is a physiological fact. But we can impute nothing from this fact
about the identity of such men (i.e., that they are not men). Rather, the experiences of
transgender men reminds us that biology and identity are two separate issues, and that supporting
and recognizing transgender men who carry children requires an approach that engages both with
the body itself (i.e., the specific issues that pregnant bodies experience), but which does so in
conjunction with an engagement with the person who occupies the body (i.e., in this case a man).
This requires recognition of the fact that health care professionals must acknowledge how gender
norms shape individual health care needs, and that whilst there may be some similarities between
pregnant men and pregnant women (i.e., carrying a child), there will also be vast differences
according both to the individual’s experience of their gendered body, as well as the differences in
their physiology at a hormonal, physical and psychological level. Engaging with trans men who
10
bear children, then, requires a specific approach that recognizes such men as men, and does not
Works Cited
Currah, Paisley. “Expecting Bodies: The Pregnant Man and Transgender Exclusion.” Women’s
Halberstam, Judith. “The Pregnant Man.” The Velvet Light Trap 65 (2010): 77-78. Print.
http://www.milkjunkies.net
Moore, Tom and Scott Moore. My Pregnant Dad 20/20 Interview. August 25 (2011).
More, Sam Dylan. “The Pregnant Man – An Oxymoron?.” Journal of Gender Studies 7 (1998):
319-328. Print.
Riggs Damien. “What Makes a Man? Thomas Beatie, Embodiment, and ‘Mundane
Rubin, Henry. Self-Made Men: Identity and Embodiment Among Transsexual Men.
Ryan, Maura. “Beyond Thomas Beatie: Trans Men and the New Parenthood.” Who’s Your
Daddy? And Other Writings on Queer Parenting. Ed. Rachel Epstein. Toronto: Sumach
11
Ware, Syrus Marcus. “Boldy Going Where Few Men Have Gone Before: One Trans Man’s
Experience.” Who’s Your Daddy? And Other Writings on Queer Parenting. Ed. Rachel
Epstein. Toronto.
12