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    Cabaret Script

    Uploaded by

    Vaibu Mohan
    The speaker introduces their Prius, Sheila, and talks about their deep love for her despite her unreliability. They apologize to Sheila for being late but blame her for hiding and having flat tires. The speaker tries to leave Sheila but can't quit her, saying others don't understand their toxic relationship and that Sheila is their favorite drug.

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    Cabaret Script

    Uploaded by

    Vaibu Mohan
    177 views1 page
    The speaker introduces their Prius, Sheila, and talks about their deep love for her despite her unreliability. They apologize to Sheila for being late but blame her for hiding and having flat tires. The speaker tries to leave Sheila but can't quit her, saying others don't understand their toxic relationship and that Sheila is their favorite drug.

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    The speaker introduces their Prius, Sheila, and talks about their deep love for her despite her unreliability. They apologize to Sheila for being late but blame her for hiding and having flat tires. The speaker tries to leave Sheila but can't quit her, saying others don't understand their toxic relationship and that Sheila is their favorite drug.

    Copyright:

    © All Rights Reserved
    Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online from Scribd
    Download as docx, pdf, or txt
    177 views1 page

    Cabaret Script

    Uploaded by

    Vaibu Mohan
    The speaker introduces their Prius, Sheila, and talks about their deep love for her despite her unreliability. They apologize to Sheila for being late but blame her for hiding and having flat tires. The speaker tries to leave Sheila but can't quit her, saying others don't understand their toxic relationship and that Sheila is their favorite drug.

    Copyright:

    © All Rights Reserved
    Download as DOCX, PDF, TXT or read online from Scribd
    Download as docx, pdf, or txt
    You are on page 1of 1

    Cabaret Script

    1. Thank you! Thank you everyone! Now, who here like to drive fast? Who like to go
    from 0 to 60 in under ten seconds? And who here like a hot hunk of mental that get
    50 miles to the gallon on the freeway and in the city?
    2. I’d like to introduce you to a very special lady. This is Sheila…my Prius. She is the love
    of my life and the only girl who really gets me. How many of you named your car?
    (Insert audience bit) Do any of you talk to your car? Anyone in a deep, committed,
    sometimes toxic relationship with said vehicle? No? Just me? Ok, ok I can see the
    looks on everyone’s faces like this girl is coo-coo for coco puffs. But can you blame
    me? I mean, she’s just so pretty!
    3. You know what? I’m sorry. Sheila, I have to level with you. You are an unreliable
    floozy. I mean, when I’m late for a meeting you hide from me in the parking garage.
    When I’m going to a callback, you get not one but two flat tires. True story folks! It
    literally happened right outside. And when I just want to get to Robbie’s class in the
    morning, you DIE! I have to get out of here. Sorry everyone. I’m out. [cue music]
    Sheila? No. I can’t. Stop it! Can’t you see what you do to me?
    4. Oh baby! I could never quit you. And I don’t care what other people say. They just
    don’t understand our relationship. Some people have coke, and I have speed. And no
    matter how hard I try, Sheila you’re my favorite drug.

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