2017-Esther Manual

RAISING UP
MODERN DAY
ESTHERS
A GLOBAL ADVANCE LEADERSHIP TRAINING MANUAL
FOR WOMEN
CONNIE PARKER
RAISING UP MODERN DAY ESTHERS
A GLOBAL ADVANCE LEADERSHIP TRAINING MANUAL
FOR WOMEN
This book is not to be re-sold by anyone other than

Global Advance. Permission is hereby granted to reproduce
individual lessons for training, provided that the reproductions are
distributed free of charge.
Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture quotations are from the

English Standard Version of the Bible. Copyright © 2001 by Crossway
Bibles, a publishing ministry of Good News Publishers.
© Connie M. Parker
CONTENTS
FOREWORD………………………………………………....................…….…..4
INTRODUCTION ……………………………………….........................……5
WHO I AM
1. My Identity in Christ …………...………………………….......................7
2. Walking in the Spirit………………………………..................….….....15
3. Mapping My Life…………………..…………………............................21
4. Dealing With My Past………………..………………...................…..28
MY RELATIONSHIPS
5. Nurturing My Relationship With God..…………………….......35
6. Servant Leadership …………………………………………................48

7. Values, Priorities, Balance ………………………..............………..56
8. Communications, Personalities, Relationships ……….….63
MY LEADERSHIP
9. Leading Where God Has Placed You ……………….......……73
10. Teamwork – The Key to Leadership ……………………......….79
11. Called to Follow ……………………………………..............................86
12. Reflecting, Celebrating, Commissioning ……....................94
BIBLIOGRAPHY………………………………………...….........................99
FOREWORD
Dear friends,
You are called to a great purpose!
This resource is being given to you by Global Advance to build

your faith and to help you impact others for Christ.
Many who will use this book live in cultures where women are often
treated poorly. We want you to know that God thinks highly of you.
You were created in His image. He loves you and desires to use
your life to make a difference.
Just like Esther, you are called for such a time as this. It is no
accident that you live during this season of history in the place
where God has you. He wants to use you to impact others for His
purposes.
Our prayer is that you will be encouraged and equipped to

influence other women for good. You are important to God’s plan
for your family, your community, your nation, and the world!
Gratefully commissioned,
Jonathan Shibley, President - Global Advance

Whitney Daugherty, Coordinator - The Esther Initiative
4
INTRODUCTION
And Jesus came and said to them, “All authority in heaven and on
18
earth has been given to me. 19 Go therefore and make disciples of
all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son
and of the Holy Spirit, 20 teaching them to observe all that I have
commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of
the age. (Matthew 28:18–20)
These instructions of Jesus to His disciples, his last while He was

here on earth, are at the very heart of this booklet. Did you notice he
didn’t just ask His bewildered followers to lead people to salvation
and promise them a home in heaven? They were asked to “make
disciples of all nations, … teaching them to observe all that I have
commanded you,” a much greater challenge! To “make disciples”
requires us to open our lives and give ourselves without reservation
to the task of leading and loving others, encouraging them to
pursue a personal daily obedient relationship with the Creator of the
Universe, the Savior of our souls.
It has been my joy and privilege to write this booklet for you,
sharing my personal leadership journey. Some of the lessons I
learned by observation and instruction from many able leaders I
have encountered along the way, some I read in books or listened
to in seminars and sermons and applied “on-the-go,” and some I
learned through my own successes and failures. I freely admit that
the principles are basic and don’t begin to cover the subject matter,
but I have given you additional reference material “for further study”
if a particular topic seems confusing or is of particular interest or
relevance to your situation.
I have written these lessons specifically for those who desired

biblical leadership training materials for women. The examples and
experiences are from a woman’s perspective. If you are Christian
woman in leadership who is committed to developing the next
generation of leaders for the Kingdom of God, I encourage you to
use these lessons as a guide for twelve leadership-training sessions.
If you are a woman who is just beginning your leadership journey,
prayerfully seek others who are like-minded and together recruit a
godly mentor who will share her wisdom and experience with you.
5
My sincere hope is that you will study these lessons “in community,”
with each individual reading and reflecting on the material prior to
meeting either online or in person to share thoughts, experiences,
and wisdom and to encourage one another.
Leadership can be a humbling experience. If you don’t think of

yourself as a “natural leader,” you are in good company; neither did
Moses, Gideon or David, but God chose them to lead thousands.
The good news is God is not asking us to make disciples who will
follow us, but disciples whom we can lead to follow Jesus, He who is
“with [us] always,” who holds “all authority in heaven and on earth!”
May His wisdom and presence guide all of us, as we seek to

follow Him!
6
LESSON 1: MY IDENTITY IN CHRIST
One of the first rules of leadership is to establish who you are

and where you’re going. Without that, you and all those who follow
you are doomed to wander aimlessly, accomplishing nothing. As
Christians our identity in Christ is clear. Hundreds of verses in
Scripture describe who God says we are. We are the salt of the
earth, the light of the world, ambassadors for Christ, His body, a royal
priesthood, a holy nation. But who does God say I am? How does
He see me? I know I am “born again” (John 3:3). Does that change
my identity? If so, how, or how not? Paul addresses the answers to
these questions very powerfully in Ephesians, a letter written to the
“saints … faithful in Christ Jesus.” That includes us!!
1. I am blessed: “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus

Christ, who has blessed us in Christ with every spiritual blessing
in the heavenly places” (Ephesians 1:3). The word “blessed” is
the Greek word “eulogeo” (think “eulogy”) meaning “to speak
well of someone.” I bless (“speak well of God”) who has blessed
(“spoken well of me”). How amazing is it that the God who
7
powerfully spoke the worlds and the universe into existence from
nothing, has creatively spoken “every spiritual blessing” into my
life in Christ? When I have been discouraged or sorrowful and felt
that I had nothing to give, He spoke well of me, praised me, and
blessed me with every spiritual blessing. In the Old Testament,
fathers pronounced a blessing on their children. Remember
the story of Jacob blessing his grandchildren in Egypt, David’s
blessing on Solomon? There is creative power in the blessing,
and God, Our Father, has spoken His creative blessing over us,
transmitting to us, every spiritual blessing. Think about what that
means!!
2. I am chosen: “even as he chose us in him before the foundation

of the world that we should be holy and blameless before him”
(Ephesians 1:4a). God Himself chose me. No matter what anyone
has thought or said, I was not an accident, an afterthought, or a
mistake. Even if my parents expressed disappointment that I was
not a boy, God chose me to be female, a woman after His own
heart. And it was not a last minute, hasty decision. I was chosen
before the foundation of the world. He knit me together in my
mother’s womb (Psalm 139:13). The Greek word for “chose” is
“eklegomai” meaning, “to choose for oneself, elect.” He selected
me and claimed me as His own. At the market when we are
selecting fruit, we choose the best, the excellent, the pure, not
always for what they already are, but for the potential that we
see in them and typically with a specific purpose in mind. God’s
choosing us should never be a source of pride for us because
God chooses the foolish and the weak in the world’s eyes (1 Cor.
1:27). But it should inspire us with hope and encouragement, and
drive us to our knees as we recognize we are dependent on Him
(2 Corinthians 12:9).
3. I am loved: “In love he predestined us” (Ephesians 1:4b, 5).

Hundreds of Scripture verses describe God’s deep and unending
love for each of His children, but none more powerfully than
Romans 8:38, 39 and Romans 5:7, 8:
38
I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers,
nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, 39 nor
8
height nor depth, nor anything else in NOTES

all creation, will be able to separate
us from the love of God in Christ Jesus
our Lord.
7
For one will scarcely die for a
righteous person—though perhaps for
a good person one would dare even
to die— 8 but God shows his love for
us in that while we were still sinners,
Christ died for us.
Some of us may have never known

the extravagant love of an earthly
father and God’s love may seem like an
impossible dream, and yet deep within
our spirits we long for it --- a love that is
strong, unconditional, compassionate,
kind, generous, forgiving, and gentle. He
offers that and more. Some of us may
have experienced deep emotional hurts
and may be asking, “If God loves me
and He is so powerful, why did He let it
happen?” He wants us to know that in
the midst of our pain, He was there, and
His heart was breaking with ours. He
welcomes us to run to Him and embrace
His love and healing power. Others, like
me, may have known the love of a kind
and gracious father. It was easy for me to
believe in a wise and forgiving Heavenly
Father. I pictured him like my dad whom I
idolized. But I will never forget the day in
my homesickness that God spoke to my
heart, “I want to be your Father.” It was
as though scales fell from my eyes, and
immediately He became my ever-present
source of strength and shelter and truth.
9
I never looked back. If you are longing to know that God the
Father loves you unconditionally, ask Him to reveal that truth to
your heart, then start looking for Him in the unexpected places of
your day.
4. I am adopted: “He predestined us for adoption as sons through

Jesus Christ, according to the purpose of his will” (Ephesians 1:5).
Not only has God chosen me, blessed me, and loved me, but He
has adopted me into His family and given me an inheritance (John
1:12; Ephesians 1:11; Galatians 4:6, 7)! What an amazing privilege to
be part of God’s family, to meet my sisters and brothers all over
the world. We may not speak the same language or share the
same culture, but we have One Father, One Savior, and One Spirit
and that unites us in love and care for one another.
5. I am accepted: “to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which

He made us accepted in the Beloved” (Ephesians 1:6 (NKJV)).
The word “accepted” is the Greek word “charitoo” which means
“found delightful, took pleasure in.” The only other time that
particular Greek word is used in the New Testament is in Luke
1:28 when the angel greets Mary as “highly favored one.” God
finds me delightful in the Beloved. He takes pleasure in me. He
accepts me. He says I am highly favored. Women love to spend
time with family and friends. We love to hear one another’s stories
and share our own. Relationships are important to us as women;
they energize us and boost our spirits – until they don’t. Rejection
is doubly difficult for us; the wounds go deep. How wonderful
to know that the King of Kings loves us and accepts us just as
we are. He will never abandon us or hide from us. He asks us
to come boldly into His throne room (Hebrews 4:16). When I
pray, I picture a beautiful golden room with God seated high and
lifted up. As I approach the door His face lights up with pleasure
and He welcomes me not only into His presence as a penitent
pleading for a favor, but He also opens His arms wide so I can run
to My Father and receive His warm embrace. I am “accepted,”
“highly favored” and “His delight.”
6. I am redeemed: “In him we have redemption through his blood”

10
(Ephesians 1:7a).
The Greek word for redemption is “apolytrosis.” Its root word
meaning “loose” or “open” is used to describe freeing those in
prison, opening things that are closed, and destroying walls. In
the book of Ruth, the concept of redemption is clearly pictured.
In Ruth’s day, when a family was in ruin, “The responsible closest
relative in family affairs [in her case Boaz]… must redeem for the
family lives or goods which have fallen into bondage” (Kittel,
1964, p. 330). At the fall, we were sold into bondage to sin; we
became slaves to sin (1 Corinthians 15:22; Romans 6:16 – 22). But
God, through the blood of Jesus, paid the redemption price to
set us free from the power of sin. He destroyed the walls of the
prison of sin that kept us bound, and restored us to His family
(Romans 6:18). The story of Ruth is our story. Jesus, our Boaz, our
Kinsman-Redeemer, has paid the price for our redemption, for our
restored relationship with our Heavenly Father.
7. I am forgiven: “In him we have … the forgiveness of our

trespasses, according to the riches of his grace” (Ephesians 1:7b).
My past is forgiven! All of it!! I am made holy and righteous in
God’s eyes. “He has clothed me with the garments of salvation;
he has covered me with the robe of righteousness” (Isaiah 61:10).
I have “put on the new self, created after the likeness of God in
true righteousness and holiness” (Ephesians 4:24). Like Abraham,
I “believed God, and it was counted to [me] as righteousness”
(Romans 4:3). I can identify with David in saying, “Blessed is
the one whose transgression is forgiven, whose sin is covered.
Blessed is the man against whom the LORD counts no iniquity, and
in whose spirit there is no deceit” (Psalm 32:1,2). “Transgression”
is the Hebrew word “pesa” meaning “rebellious sin,” (“I knew
it was wrong and I decided to do it anyway”). Even those sins
God forgives. David experienced that; he would know. God
also forgives all my other “sins” (“chataa”) that I have committed
and the “iniquity” or depravity (“avon”) of my heart as well. The
penalty for my sin has been paid by the blood of Jesus and I
11
NOTES have the assurance that “If [I] confess

[my] sins, he is faithful and just to forgive
[me my] sins and to cleanse [me] from all
unrighteousness” (1 John 1:9). There is
nothing I can do to earn forgiveness. “For
by grace you have been saved through
faith. And this is not your own doing; it is
the gift of God, not a result of works, so
that no one may boast (Ephesians 2: 8, 9).
8. I am seated with Him in heavenly places:

He “raised [me] up with him and seated
[me] with him in the heavenly places in
Christ Jesus” (Ephesians 2:6). During His
trial before the high priest, Jesus gave this
testimony “from now on the Son of Man
shall be seated at the right hand of the
power of God” (Luke 22:69). Jesus knew
where He was going and He has taken
us with Him. What are the implications
of that? In Christ we have been given
authority over the enemy. Now we have a
responsibility to exercise that authority in
the name of Jesus.
9. I am called: “That you may know what is

the hope to which he has called you, what
are the riches of his glorious inheritance
in the saints” (Ephesians 1:18). I have been
called by Him to live with hope!!
MEMORIZE:
1 John 3:2 Beloved, we are God’s
children now, and what we will be has
not yet appeared; but we know that
when he appears we shall be like him,
because we shall see him as he is.
Ephesians 1:3–6 3 Blessed be the God
12
and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in

Christ with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places,
4
even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the
world, that we should be holy and blameless before him. In
love 5 he predestined us for adoption as sons through Jesus
Christ, according to the purpose of his will, 6 to the praise of his
glorious grace, with which he has blessed us in the Beloved.
KEY TRUTH:
I am blessed. I am chosen. I am loved. I am adopted. I am
accepted. I am redeemed. I am forgiven. I am seated with Him in
heavenly places. I am called.
YOUR RESPONSE:
1. Choose three truths from this list that mean most to you right now.
How will a deeper awareness of each of these truths change the way
you think about yourself, the way you think about God, and the way
you think about the people you care most about in life?
a. _________________________________________
b. _________________________________________
c. _________________________________________
2. Which of these truths is most difficult for you to believe? What

action step could you begin to take tomorrow to increase your
acceptance of this truth about yourself? It may be as simple as
praying daily that God will reveal and confirm that truth to your heart,
or it may be deciding to do a focused Bible study on what God’s
Word says about it, or some other step that God puts on your heart
personally.
3. Which of these truths is easiest for you to accept, and why do

you think that is the case? Was there a time when a Scripture verse,
or a Bible Study, a personal experience, or revelation from God, or
something else confirmed that truth to your heart?
13
FOR FURTHER STUDY:

He Loves Me by Wayne Jacobsen (Jacobsen, 2000)
Believing God by Beth Moore (Moore, 2004)
The Blessing by Smalley and Trent (Smalley & Trent, 1986)
14
LESSON 2: WALKING IN THE SPIRIT
THE NEW ME: BODY, SOUL, AND SPIRIT

God has created each of us with three distinct, yet integrated
parts – spirit, soul, body (1 Thessalonians 5:23). If we think of the soul
as being our mind, will and emotions, and our spirit as being the very
core of our being, here is an easy way to picture it:
When I became a Christian, it was my spirit that was made new (2

Corinthians 5:17). My body stayed the
same, not gaining or losing weight, or
changing hair color, and my soul (mind,
will, and emotions) were essentially
M
LL
unchanged as well. If I was not a

IN
WI
D
SPIRIT good mathematician before I became

a Christian, I probably was no better
EM
afterward. If I was strong-willed before
OT I O N S
I became a Christian, I was probably
equally strong-willed afterward. And
if I suffered emotional trauma before
15
I became a Christian, it is likely the emotional after-effects still

lingered. So what became new? My spirit!! At salvation God installed
a communications device within me – in my spirit. Romans 8:14 says
that as a child of God, I am to be led by God’s Spirit. How does that
happen? His Spirit communicates with my spirit, frequently in a still,
small voice (1 Kings 19:11, 12). But even if my spirit wants to follow what
God tells me to do, my mind, will, emotions and body do not give up
their positions of control without a struggle.
RENEWING MY MIND
I must begin the process of renewing my mind, (Romans 12:2) by
reading and meditating on God’s Word, and prayerfully studying to
understand His character and His purposes. I can also encourage my
spirit to grow stronger by praying, singing in the spirit, and praying in
the spirit (Jude 20). The stronger my spirit grows, the more it gains
mastery over my soul (mind, will and emotions) and my body. As the
Word of God renews my mind, it too begins to be conformed to the
Spirit of God (John 15:3).
But the good news and the bad news is that my mind is renewed
by whatever I feed it. If I feed it God’s thoughts and God’s Word,
it will be renewed toward God. If I continue to feed it garbage,
unwholesome TV, books, movies, music, magazines, conversations,
and other negative things, the renewal of my mind will be a slow and
tedious process.
In addition to controlling what goes into my mind, I must learn

to allow my spirit to control my thoughts. Philippians 4:8 says
“whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever
is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is
any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about
these things.” Unfortunately, when we think negative thoughts, we
eventually speak negative words, and that leads to negative actions
(Proverbs 23:7, KJV). The downward spiral is inevitable.
As a young mom with two preschoolers I struggled in this area.

Without conscious thought, in the course of changing diapers and
wiping noses, I would find myself thinking negatively about people
16
and circumstances in my life. I could not NOTES

believe how quickly my thinking could spiral
downward. One day as I pictured myself stuck
at the bottom of a ski slope with a long hard
climb back up the hill, I remember praying,
“Lord, if you will just make me aware of
negative thinking when I’m at the top of the hill,
it would be easier for me to stop the downward
slide.” I began to start my days with that
prayer, and God was faithful to give me that
split-second awareness in my spirit. “Don’t go
there.” At that point I discovered if I would start
reciting Scripture, or singing a worship song, or
putting on praise music that would lift my spirits
back to that which was “pure, and lovely.”
We don’t need to feel condemned when

we catch ourselves in negative thinking, but
we do need to repent. Negative thinking is
a sin because it is contrary to God’s Word
(Philippians 4:8). Ask the Holy Spirit to convict
you each time you start to think negatively
(John 16:7,8). Don’t try to win the battle of
the mind on your own. He is there to help
you. Ask Him to help, and go on. Begin to
claim Philippians 1:6 that “He who has begun
a good work in me is well able to bring it to
completion.” I can learn to have a positive
attitude toward my life.
SUBMITTING MY WILL AND EMOTIONS

Not only did my mind have to be renewed,
but my will also had to be taught to submit itself
to the Spirit of God. Paul says it this way, “I
have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer
I who live, but Christ who lives in me. And the
life I now live in the flesh I live by faith in the
Son of God, who loved me and gave himself
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NOTES for me” (Galatians 2:20). Every day my will

must be “crucified,” so I can begin to choose
God’s ways. It is all about making him Lord in
every area of my life, including my thinking.
My emotions too must be conformed to

the Spirit of God who now lives within me. In a
later chapter we’ll learn about dealing with the
emotional wounds from our past, but for now
let’s just look at the simple question every new
Christian asks. I know I’m supposed to “rejoice
always,” (Philippians 4:4; 1 Thessalonians 5:16),
and I’ve read about Christians who live that
way, but how do I learn to do that? Ephesians
5:20 holds the secret. “Giving thanks always
and for everything to God the Father in the
name of our Lord Jesus Christ.” Corrie ten
Boom tells the story of learning to thank God
for fleas in her World War II concentration
camp, when her sister reminded her that those
fleas kept the guards away. When I can learn
to live with a heart of true gratitude and give
thanks for even the tough challenges of my
life, I release joy and peace deep in my spirit.
I am trusting God with my circumstances,
knowing He has promised to work all things
for good, whether I can see the good now
or not (Romans 8:28). When things don’t go
the way I hoped and I have done all I can, I
choose to believe that God has a better plan
and start looking expectantly to see where He
is at work. As I release control of the situation
to God instead of trying to reshape the
circumstances to fit my plan, I am submitting
my will to His. I find that the more I allow joy
and peace to fill my spirit, the more I flow with
God’s Spirit and the more hopeful I become
about good coming from even very difficult
18
circumstances. It is that hope, Hebrews 6:19 tells us, that is the “sure
and steadfast anchor of the soul.” In a chaotic, confusing, and ever-
changing world, I need an anchor for my soul.
And therefore the Lord [earnestly] waits [expecting, looking,

and longing] to be gracious to you; and therefore He lifts
Himself up, that He may have mercy on you and show loving-
kindness to you. For the Lord is a God of justice. Blessed
(happy, fortunate, to be envied) are all those who [earnestly]
wait for Him, who expect and look and long for Him [for
His victory, His favor, His love, His peace, His joy, and His
matchless, unbroken companionship]! (Isaiah 30:18 The
Amplified Bible)
MEMORIZE:
2 Corinthians 5:17 - Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a
new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has
come.
Jude 20 - But you, beloved, building yourselves up in your
most holy faith and praying in the Holy Spirit,
Romans 12:2 - Do not be conformed to this world, but be
transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing
you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and
acceptable and perfect.
Galatians 5:16 - But I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not
gratify the desires of the flesh.
KEY TRUTH:
Walking by the Spirit involves daily discipline of the body, renewal
of the mind, healing of the emotions, and submission of the will. It
sounds challenging and legalistic, but in reality it is liberating, light,
and life giving, because it is accomplished not by self-effort, but by
yielding to the moment-by-moment life of the Spirit.
19
YOUR RESPONSE:
1. Which areas of your life (body, mind, will, emotions) do you find
most challenging to yield to the control of the Holy Spirit? Spend
some time thinking and praying about why and journal your thoughts.
2. What step can you take tomorrow to win a small victory in this
area?
FOR FURTHER STUDY:

Cleansing Seminar by Cleansing Stream Ministries (Ministries, 1999)
The Winning Attitude by John Maxwell (Maxwell, 1993)
Battlefield of the Mind by Joyce Myer (Meyer, 1995)
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LESSON 3: MAPPING MY LIFE
Throughout my years of ministry, I have listened to the life stories

of hundreds of God’s daughters. While my conclusions are by no
means the result of a scientific study, I can make three general
observations:
1. While many of the women were raised in homes with non-
believing parents and rarely attended church, the majority
of these women recognized, much to their surprise, that
even as small children they were drawn to prayer and belief
in God.
2. Approximately half of the women who shared their stories
with me were victims of verbal or sexual abuse as children.
Many of them had never shared that experience with
anyone, but seemed to find it liberating to speak about it in
a “safe” setting.
3. There is power, wisdom, encouragement and strength in
speaking, hearing and reflecting on the lessons learned
from our life stories.
21
NOTES This lesson is intended to guide you

through the process of reflecting on your
“spiritual journey.” The intent is to apply
prayerful reflection to the events and
experiences of your life in order to give fresh
perspective on who you are and how God is
preparing and equipping you for what He is
calling you to do in your leadership journey
ahead.
MY HERITAGE:
Prepare a “family tree” that lists the
names and relationships of family members
who have had a positive influence on your
life. Do not include birth or death dates or
names you do not know. The goal is not to
create a genealogy, but a record of family
influence in your life. Beside each name
list their relationship to you and the positive
influence they have had on your life. Here is
an example:
Mary Ann Munday: mother
Modeled the joy of serving others
Demonstrated humility, how to
overcome adversity.
You may have ancestors whom you have

never met, but they made decisions that
positively impacted your life. Perhaps they
made a decision to become an immigrant in
another country or start a business that has
changed the course of family life.
This work of God in your life is your

heritage, though the events may have occurred
before you were born.
22
MY LIFE STORY:
Think about your life in five-year increments from birth to the
present. On a separate piece of paper or in a notebook, for each
five-year period, list the most significant things that happened in your
life, the people who influenced you and the places you experienced.
Add a short sentence about why they were important.
Specifically think about:
1. Difficulties – particularly painful events, people, or experiences

2. Delights – experiences of great joy and contentment
3. Influencers – people who inspired you– mentors, parents,
close friends, teachers, leaders you met or people you read
about
4. God at Work – things you believe were the “hand of God” in
your life
For example: 0 to 5 years:
PEOPLE:
1. Mom
2. Dad
3. Sister(s)
4. Brother(s)
PLACES:
1. Home
2. Grandparents’ home
3. Church
EVENTS:
1. Birth of brother or sister
2. Starting school
3. Family move
FAVORITE THING TO DO:

1. Helping my mom around the house
2. Entertaining guests
3. Helping my teacher in the classroom
23
Do that for each of the five-year increments of your life: ages 6 -10,
ages 11-15, etc.
1. With that information use the line below to describe the “ups
and downs” in the circumstances of your life story. Make the
line longer if necessary. Add a word or two to describe the
event/person/place that most influenced your thoughts in your
evaluation. To create the chart, just assign a number between
1 and 12 to each age range for your emotional, spiritual, and
circumstantial state at that age.
2. Now add a line in a different color or texture to describe the

emotional “ups and downs” of your life during each period.
3. Use a 3rd line of different color or texture to describe spiritual “ups

and downs” (your walk with God).
MY CALLING, GIFTS, AND PASSION

As you reflect on your heritage and the stories of your life, select
three “stories” of events or situations when you felt most fulfilled and
energized, times when you felt you were exactly where God wanted
you to be, doing what you were created to do. It may be a specific
incident, or it may be a period of time when you were engaged in an
activity that challenged you, and yet you were able to accomplish it
successfully. Use the space below to write a brief description of each
24
of those “stories” in sufficient detail that you can remember it. As you
write, answer the following questions:
How did I get started in doing this?
a. What did I do?
b. How did I finish it?
c. How did I know I did it well?
d. What did I like most about it?
Story 1:
Story 2:
Story 3:
At this point share your stories with a trusted friend, adding color
and details as they come to mind, describing what you did and how
you did it, rather than why. Just see yourself doing it and describe
why you found the experience so satisfying. Your friend’s job is
to listen and jot down the actions you share and why you found it
satisfying, plus any clues about where you were or who you were
with.
You and your friend can then look for any similarities in the stories.
SUMMARY:
When you are alone, prayerfully reflect on your stories, your
heritage and your past experiences, and ask God to give you insight
into what you have learned about yourself and His calling and
purpose through this exercise. What are you passionate about right
25
now? What gifts/experiences might you have that would be useful in

ministry in that area? Some gifts may have been dormant and there
may have been experiences for which you have yet to find meaning,
but somehow you believe that “the story is incomplete,” that God’s
purpose is yet to be revealed.
For me personally, as I worked through this exercise, I discovered

I had a passion for “women and business.” Not long afterward, I
retired from my position as Director of Women’s Ministry and at the
age of 65 embarked on a Master of Business Administration program
at a school that emphasized theology and business. Your experience
may lead to a less dramatic change in life, but never doubt God’s
ability to intervene in your life and direct your path in His ways!
MEMORIZE:
Psalm 139:13–16 13 For you formed my inward parts; you knitted
me together in my mother’s womb. 14 I praise you, for I am
fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works;
my soul knows it very well. 15 My frame was not hidden from
you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven in the
depths of the earth. 16 Your eyes saw my unformed substance;
in your book were written, every one of them, the days that
were formed for me, when as yet there was none of them.
Psalm 37:23–24 (NLT) 23 The LORD directs the steps of the
godly. He delights in every detail of their lives. 24 Though they
stumble, they will never fall, for the LORD holds them by the
hand.
KEY TRUTH:
God has been with you, even from your mother’s womb, through
times of crisis and times of joy, whether you were aware of His
presence or not; nothing can separate you from His love.
YOUR RESPONSE:
1. What gifts do you suspect God has given you, but are still lying
dormant, yet to be developed for His Kingdom purposes?
26
2. What step could you take now or within the next 5 years to
“discover” that gift, to bring it to the surface where it can be
developed?
FOR FURTHER STUDY:

What is Your Giftedness? (Hendricks, 2013)
Discovering Your Giftedness (Bock, 2015)
StrengthsFinder 2.0 by Tom Rath (Rath, 2014)
Your Spiritual Gifts by Peter Wagner (Wagner, 1994)
Discover Your God-Given Gifts by Don & Katie Fortune (Fortune &
Fortune, 1987)
Free Spiritual Gifts Analysis (Gilbert, 2015)
27
LESSON 4: DEALING WITH MY PAST
Now that you have spent some time thinking about your heritage
as well as your personal life journey, it’s time to think about how
those people, places, and events continue to shape your life, your
relationships and your ministry today. The wisdom, insights, and
blessings that others have poured into you are now flowing through
you and blessing others. How have the negative experiences and
suffering impacted your relationships? Perhaps some of them have
made you a more compassionate and caring counselor and friend
(2 Timothy 2:2). Only you can determine if the latter have made you
“better” or “bitter.” The question is what you can do to maximize the
positive and minimize the negative impact of your past on your years
ahead.
REFLECTING ON SUCCESSES
Take a few minutes to reflect briefly on the “delights” of your life,
those times when you felt like you were doing what God created
you to do and you saw His hand of blessing. What are you thinking?
Is there a feeling of pride in what you were able to accomplish? A
28
wishful thought about returning to that place? A tinge of sadness or

fear that perhaps your “glory days” might be over and everything is
going to be downhill from here? What are the lessons to be learned
from our successes? There are several that come to my mind. God
may reveal others that are more personal to you, but here are a few
He has taught me.
When I have worked hard and experienced significant success, it

is easy to slip into a prideful spirit. Perhaps I was wise enough not to
brag about my successes before others, but in the inner spaces of my
heart was there self-congratulation? Pride is an especially dangerous
pitfall for leaders. No one teaches that lesson more forcefully than
Nebuchadnezzar, who, after feeling that sense of accomplishment,
received a warning vision, and then deep humiliation. Heed his
warning: “Those who walk in pride He is able to humble” (Daniel 4:30
- 37).
There are times when we readily recognize the “work of God” in

our success – an opportunity that miraculously opens (or shuts), a still,
quiet voice of the spirit that guides us to a difficult but unexpectedly
wise decision, a “divine appointment” in a casual conversation. But
when we work long hard hours and eventually reach the goal, and
people around us are congratulating our achievement, it is easy to
forget the One who gave us eyes to see, ears to hear, a brain to think,
educational opportunities to learn, and loving parents who nurtured
us in infancy. It is easy to think we have been victorious because of
our own efforts, and fail to express our gratitude to Him, and those
who have helped us in the journey. As you reflect on your “delights,”
express your gratitude to God. If you have never done so, consider
writing a thank you note or an email to those who made a difference
in your life.
If you are feeling sadness or fear that “the best is past,” Psalm
139:16 says God has written in His book, “the days that were formed
for me, when as yet there was none of them.” As long as there is
breath in your body, God has a work for you to do in expanding His
kingdom. The question is whether you will take your eyes off the
past long enough to seek His vision for your future. A. R. Bernard,
29
in his well-known sermon “Your Vision is Your Future” warns, “A man

without a vision is a man without a future and a man without a future
always reverts to his past.” Peter led the other disciples back to
fishing after Jesus’ death, Naomi returned to Israel after her husband
and sons died, and Adam would have returned to Eden if God had
not prevented him from doing so. If you find yourself dwelling in the
past, a good question to ask is whether you have lost the vision for
the future God has planned for you (Jeremiah 29:11).
HEALING EMOTIONAL WOUNDS

We have all experienced seasons in our lives when it seemed our
world unexpectedly came crashing down around us. For example,
the sudden loss of a loved one, a doctor’s diagnosis, a job loss, a
financial meltdown, a teenager’s rebellion, the betrayal of a friend, a
broken relationship, or whatever events you personally recorded as
contributors to your “hard times” in the last chapter. The emotional
trauma we suffer during those times can linger deep within our
spirits for years, only to re-emerge painfully when we least expect it,
triggering emotional outbursts of anger, fear, rejection, abandonment,
frustration, panic, shame, guilt, or other emotions that impact our
decisions and our current relationships. The question is, if we don’t
receive instantaneous emotional healing at salvation, how do we find
it? Is it even possible?
Let me assure you, Jesus is the Healer, not only of physical pain,
but also emotional anguish. He is the Mender of broken hearts.
He may miraculously heal those wounds instantaneously, or more
typically His healing of hearts may be more like the gentle peeling of
an onion, one layer at a time, as each is submitted to His loving touch.
From my experience, there are many parallels between physical
and emotional wounds and the types of healing that each require.
A surface scratch requires far less attention, care, and time than the
healing of the wound from an abdominal surgery. The former may
require quick assessment, application of ointment, a bandage, and
some time. Similarly, some superficial emotional wounds – an unkind
word, an angry retort, an oversight – result in an immediate sting,
but a quick assessment, a word of apology and a reaffirmation of
love and respect is the appropriate response. The matter is quickly
30
healed and easily forgotten. Proverbs 19:11 NOTES

wisely suggests, “Good sense makes one
slow to anger, and it is his glory to overlook an
offense.”
But deeper wounds are not so easily

treated – the betrayal of a close friend, the
deception of a trusted advisor, a broken
commitment, an unresolved dispute that leads
to heated words, or an injustice. These may
require additional attention. If left untreated,
these emotional wounds, like untreated
physical wounds may “fester” and become
“infected” in a way that impacts the rest of the
body. An emotional wound festers when we
continually “pick at the scab” by meditating on
the wrong done without prayerfully seeking
to resolve the issue, or by allowing bitterness
to take root within the heart (Hebrews 12:15).
We justify ourselves by claiming we only want
“truth” and “righteousness” to prevail, but in
our hearts there is a festering wound spewing
poison throughout our hearts and relationships.
Only in true forgiveness is there healing and
freedom. Scripture is very clear. Forgiveness
is not optional for the Christian. In Matthew
6:15 Jesus said, “If you do not forgive others
their trespasses, neither will your Father forgive
your trespasses.” Forgiveness does not mean
that what the person said or did was not painful
or that it is acceptable for them to do it again.
And forgiveness does not necessarily mean
we have to have a restored relationship with
that person. If they refuse to acknowledge the
wrong and are likely to harm us again, we can
still forgive them, but love them from a distance.
Forgiveness is for us, so the poison of failing to
forgive does not destroy our other relationships
31
NOTES or bind us emotionally to the person who
hurt us. So how can we tell if we have truly
forgiven a past wrong? When the incident
no longer impacts our current decisions,
we know we are free from its power over
us. Remember that forgiveness is frequently
a process rather than a one-time event.
Whenever the hurt comes to mind, choose to
forgive.
There are also the very deep “abdominal

surgery” types of emotional wounds that
come as the result of trauma, abuse, or other
violence that has been personally experienced
either as a victim or as a witness. Jesus is
still the Mender of Hearts and the Healer. No
situation is too difficult for His gentle loving
touch. Like physical wounds, emotional
wounds are frequently very deep and
visible from the outside – a string of broken
relationships, an angry countenance and bitter
speech, fears and insecurities that hinder
growth. And as with physical wounds, Jesus
heals emotional wounds from the inside out.
How can we tell if we have emotional

wounds from our past that require action on
our part to experience freedom? Many of us
have experienced times when someone has
said or done something, and we find ourselves
reacting in a way that even we, in the heat of
the moment, recognize is disproportionate to
the situation. What causes that? Frequently,
it is an unhealed emotional wound that the
enemy is using as bait to lure us into his trap
of negative thinking, often a lie we came to
believe during a difficult time. The lie then
holds us captive emotionally until the truth sets
32
us free (John 8:32).
What actions can we take to experience emotional healing and

freedom? (Note: you may want a trusted spiritually mature friend to
be present with you and pray with you as you follow these steps).
1. Come quietly before your Heavenly Father and
acknowledge your need for help and healing.
2. Ask the Holy Spirit to help you visualize the situation that is
at the root of your wound. He may bring an incident from
your past into your mind, or perhaps the still quiet voice of
His Spirit will speak to your heart. You may be surprised at
what you receive, but trust His leading.
3. Ask Him if there is anything He wants you to know about
that situation and to reveal any lies you have believed as a
result of it. Anything that is contradictory to God’s Word is
a lie of the enemy. For example, “No one loves me,” is a lie
of the enemy. “I have to look out for myself. No one else is
going to do it for me.” Another lie of the enemy.
4. Repent and ask God to forgive you. Believing a lie of the
enemy is a sin. There may be other sins that you have
committed that are connected to the event as well. For
example, participating in the occult is a sin, and willingly
engaging in addictive behaviors is a sin.
5. Ask God if there is anyone whose forgiveness you need to
seek and be obedient to what He tells you to do. Holding
unforgiveness in your heart is a sin.
Don’t forget to thank God for His forgiveness and for His healing
power.
If difficult times are so challenging and can have such a negative

impact on our lives, why does a loving God not spare us that pain and
struggle? Most of us can attest to the fact that it was during those
times of crisis that we grew strong, assuming we bent our wills to His
and leaned hard on Him throughout it.
MEMORIZE:
John 8:32 - And you will know the truth, and the truth will set
you free.
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2 Corinthians 10:4–5 - 4 For the weapons of our warfare are not

of the flesh but have divine power to destroy strongholds. 5 We
destroy arguments and every lofty opinion raised against the
knowledge of God, and take every thought captive to obey
Christ.
1 Corinthians 10:13 - No temptation has overtaken you that is
not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you
be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he
will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to
endure it.
KEY TRUTH:
God’s desire is for us to be free from the bondage of our past, to view
it instead from His perspective through the lens of His truth – sins
forgiven, conscience cleansed, wounds healed, Satan defeated, fear
conquered, love restored.
YOUR RESPONSE:
If you find yourself continually asking God for forgiveness in some
area of your life, spend some “alone” time with Him, asking Him to
show you why you seem unable to have victory over that particularly
area. For me it was a sin of pride. One day as I confessed it yet
again, I felt the Lord say “Do you want to be rid of that?” Honestly the
thought had never occurred to me that I could be free. My immediate
reaction was, “Yes.” For the next fifteen minutes I had flashes of
situations when I competed with others (my sister, friends, husband)
and experienced pride in “winning.” Then He showed me how that
competitive spirit had affected my relationships and led to a spirit of
jealousy that had taken root in my heart. That was the beginning of
my journey to freedom. What does God want to talk to you about?
FOR FURTHER STUDY:

Theophostic Prayer Ministry by Ed M. Smith (Smith, 2005)
Totally Free by Robert Morris (Morris, 2015)
Breaking Free by Beth Moore (Moore, 1999)
Forgive and Forget by Lewis Smedes (Smedes, 1984)
www.immanuelapproach.com
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LESSON 5: NURTURING MY RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD
Just as we need to exercise physically in order to maintain our

physical conditioning and health, we need to work out spiritually
to stretch our spiritual muscles and develop spiritual fitness. This
chapter briefly covers twelve different spiritual exercises useful for
that purpose. You won’t use all of them every day or even in every
season of life, but be aware that they exist and have been used
by Christians for centuries. Jesus Himself modeled each of them
while He was here on earth. When you learn to practice these
disciplines, they will help you grow spiritually and develop a deeper
relationship with God. They will also help you maintain an awareness
of the spiritual realm that offers such a different perspective than
the physical realm we perceive with our senses. The good news is
that we don’t need to be advanced theologians to exercise these
disciplines; all we need is a heart that longs for God (Psalm 42:1,2).
Performing these “exercises” as though they were religious

duties or a spiritual “checklist” is not the goal. The goal is to deal with
our sin and self-centeredness. If we try to confront these head-on
35
NOTES using willpower and determination, we will

become like the Pharisees, who tried to use
external means to address issues of the heart.
Eventually it will be clear that we have failed,
for “out of the abundance of the heart the
mouth speaks” (Matthew 12:34). Only God can
transform hearts, but these disciplines will help
prepare our hearts for God to do His work.
In the parable of the sower, Jesus said the

seed is the Word of God, and the soil is the
heart. You can think of these “disciplines” as
preparing the soil of your heart so the seed of
God’s Word will take root and grow (Galatians
6:8; Luke 8:5-8). “Now you are clean through
the word that I have spoken unto you” (John
15:3).
PART 1: DISCIPLINES OF THE SPIRIT

1. WORSHIP
Jesus told the woman at the well that God
is actively seeking those who will worship Him
in spirit and truth (John 4:23). What does that
mean? Reflect on that for a moment. To me
it means He is seeking those who will come
before Him in love and simplicity, honestly and
openly, hearts bare, with no pretense or secret
sins and no hidden agendas, giving Him the
honor He is due. In addition, Psalm 95:6 tells
us to “worship and bow down; let us kneel
before the Lord, our Maker.” Regardless of
whether we are physically on our knees or not,
when we worship the Lord our hearts should
be in an attitude of humility and reverence
before Him. We are to worship Him “in the
splendor of holiness” “at his footstool,” “with
clean hands and a pure heart” (Psalm 29:2;
99:5; 24:4).
36
Our voluntary worship and praise is what God is seeking,

not because it feeds His ego, but for what it does in us. As we
acknowledge His glory and power, majesty and holiness, and spend
time in His presence our problems and circumstances will gain His
perspective.
Worship may take many forms – listening to worship music that

quiets our spirit, joining in corporate worship, singing in the spirit,
praying in the spirit, kneeling down, lying prostrate, raising our
hands in surrender to Him, or whatever it takes to spiritually enter
His presence. Our physical form is less important than our spirit
connecting with His Spirit in love, honor, and adoration. Come into
His presence with an attitude of expectancy, ready to give all that you
are to Him.
2. CONFESSION
The central truth of the gospel is that Jesus died for our sins.
He bore the punishment we deserved, so that we might have
forgiveness, cleansing, a restored relationship with God, and eternal
life. In 1 John 1:9 we read “If we confess our sins, he is faithful and
just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.”
The reality is that even after we are “born again,” sin clings to us, and
daily we do and think those things that grieve the Holy Spirit. We are
often reluctant to confront those sins with specifics, acknowledging
our weakness and receiving God’s grace once again. If we want to
grow spiritually, we cannot lead an unexamined life. Daily ask God
to reveal to you specifically those things that you have thought or
said or done that have grieved His heart, then listen for His response.
“Search me O God, and know my heart! Try me and know my
thoughts! And see if there be any grievous way in me, and lead me in
the way everlasting (Psalm 139:23, 24)! Include sins of the heart (e.g.
pride, fear, envy, and anger), sins of the flesh (e.g. laziness, gluttony,
adultery), things done and things you should have done but did not
do, words, motives, and thoughts.
37
As the Holy Spirit reveals things to you, repent and ask His
forgiveness. Receive His healing and cleansing. Consider closing
your time of confession with the words of Psalm 51:10. “Create in me a
clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.”
Make it a practice throughout the day to keep “short accounts”

with God. Whenever and wherever the Holy Spirit convicts you of
sin, repent immediately and seek His forgiveness. It does not have to
be an extended soul-searching experience. You don’t have to drop
to your knees on the street or even bow your head. It is your spirit
connecting with His Spirit. Remember He loves you and longs for
moment-by-moment intimacy with you, giving you an awareness of
His presence and peace (1 Thessalonians 5:17).
There may be times in your life when the power of the sin is so
strong or the pain so deep that you are unable to find release from
guilt or bitterness. One of the ancient Christian practices was to find
a wise and trusted believer who would listen and speak aloud God’s
words of forgiveness (James 5:16).
3. PRAYER
If God is omniscient and omnipotent, why do we pray? In prayer
we establish a personal relationship with the Father. To pray is to
change. The closer we come to God and His holiness, the more we
see our need to change, to be conformed to Christ. We begin to
think God’s thoughts, and if we take time to ask questions and listen
for His answers, we will hear His voice. If you are uncertain about
whether you are truly hearing Him or not, ask yourself if what you are
hearing is consistent with how God has revealed Himself to you in His
Word. We recognize a friend’s voice on the phone because we have
heard them speak often. When someone supposedly quotes a good
friend, we know the character of our friend and can generally tell if
the quote is accurate. Similarly, it is through repetition that we hear
and recognize God’s voice. Prayer is two-way communication! God’s
sheep hear His voice. He will talk to you (John 10:27).
Prayer is something we can learn – from Jesus, from friends who

have learned to pray effectively, from the Bible (Bible characters and
38
Biblical instruction), from books on prayer (see suggested reading),

and by practice.
Prayer makes a difference (James 5:16; 1 Corinthians 3:9). Pray

for the sick, for marriages, for the government, for pastors and
missionaries, for family members and friends, for protection, even for
strangers as God points them out to you.
THREE SUGGESTED PATTERNS FOR PRAYER:

METHOD 1: The Lord’s Prayer – meditate on the pattern rather
than the familiar words
METHOD 2: ACTS: Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving,
Supplication (for others)
METHOD 3: PRAYER: Praise, Repent, Ask, Yield, Expect, Receive
4. MEDITATION
Meditation is simply reflecting, thinking, “mumbling.” If you know
how to worry, you know how to meditate.
What should you meditate on? Scripture tells us to meditate

on God’s Word, His law, His love, His works, His promises, and His
wonders (Joshua 1:8; Psalm 48:9; Psalm 77:12; 119:27, 48; 143:5).
How do you meditate? Start by setting aside a time and place,

free from interruption. I do it during my morning walk. Others sit
quietly in a prayer closet or study. Ask God to reveal His truth to your
heart. If circumstances are troubling, ask God if there is something
He wants you to know or do about them. As you pray for others,
ask God to show you how to intercede on their behalf. Listen for the
voice of His Spirit instead of problem-solving a solution yourself.
What results can you expect to receive from meditation?

According to Scripture, you can expect to experience repentance,
obedience, wisdom, new insights into God’s character, His love, His
holiness, and His power (Psalm 119:97, 101, 102).
Be patient with yourself as you learn this discipline if it is new to

you.
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PART 2: DISCIPLINES OF THE SOUL (MIND, WILL, EMOTIONS)

5. STUDY
Study involves analysis of God’s Word in order to renew the
mind and expose it to truth (Romans 12:2; Philippians 4:8). Unlike
meditation that seeks to apply what God is speaking to the heart,
study looks at Scripture to understand what it reveals about God,
His character, His purposes, and His principles for life. “Rightly
dividing the Word of truth” will require concentrated effort,
analysis, and the wisdom of the Holy Spirit. Study tools abound
on the Internet, but they should be viewed critically – are they
consistent with the rest of Scripture, with your understanding of
God’s character and purpose? There are no shortcuts in study; it
will take time and self-discipline.
Talk to someone whose knowledge and spiritual wisdom you

value to get started. A good Bible dictionary, a concordance (for
original language study) and a study Bible are an excellent start.
If you have access to the Internet, there are numerous websites
that have free study materials. A few are listed at the end of this
chapter.
Begin each study session with prayer and ask the Holy Spirit
to give you insight and wisdom. One technique is to read a large
portion of Scripture straight through and journal your thoughts
and impressions. Then read smaller passages more closely and
look up the cross-references and related passages from the study
Bible. Make notes in your Bible, highlight or underline passages
that are especially meaningful to you and journal what you learn.
If there is something that you read that you don’t understand

or seems inconsistent with something you believed to be true,
ask God to give you wisdom (James 1:5), consult commentaries,
dictionaries and other reference materials to see what others
have discovered. Talk to a spiritually mature believer whom you
trust, but be cautious about “new” doctrines. Discuss your ideas
with others to see if they are consistent with the rest of Scripture.
40
6. SOLITUDE NOTES
Solitude is being alone and not yearning
for someone to talk to. We can become
so accustomed to noise and chatter that
silence and solitude seem unfamiliar and
uncomfortable. Jesus frequently withdrew
from the crowds and even from His
disciples to seek the presence of His Father
and hear His voice (Matthew 4:1-11, Luke
6:12, Matthew 14:13, 23, Mark 1:35; Mark 6:31,
Luke 5:16). Being alone does not have to
make us feel lonely. We can learn to enjoy
the quiet moments of “alone time” with Our
Father, whether it is early in the morning
before getting out of bed, or the last thing
at night before falling asleep, moments in
traffic or waiting in line, even extended quiet
days of retreat in the “wilderness.” As we
quiet our hearts before Him, not planning
or problem-solving or thinking about past
conversations, He will speak words of love
and encouragement to our hearts, give us
His direction for our lives, and share insights
with us about the issues that trouble us
(Isaiah 30:15).
As we practice the habit of solitude,

we will find strength and peace within, an
inner space of contentment and joy that
will increase our sensitivity to the needs of
others and compassion for their pain.
7. SUBMISSION
Submission is freedom from the need
to be in control and have our own way. It
is not making our interests unimportant, but
it is choosing to deny our will and follow
Jesus, believing His way will ultimately bring
41
greater joy and fulfillment (Mark 8: 34, 35). Submission is both an

attitude and an action.
Jesus set the example for us, always choosing to live

in submission to His Father, even when it cost Him His life
(Philippians 2:4-7; John 5:30; 8:28; Matthew 26:39). He did not
live in submission to the Pharisees or the opinions of people
(Mark 12:14), although He did live under the authority of the Roman
government (Mark 12:16).
Servants in the early church were instructed to choose to

submit to their masters, even those who were harsh (1 Peter 2:18
– 21), though it seemed they had no choice. As Christians, Peter
was telling them they did have a choice and they should choose
to submit to those in authority over them. Paul instructed wives
to submit to their husbands as to the Lord (Ephesians 5:22, 24).
Peter instructed his readers to submit to governments, although in
a difficult situation, he personally chose to obey God rather than
man (1 Peter 2:13-15; Acts 5:29).
To practice the discipline of submission, choose each day

and each moment to live life in submission to God and His will.
Submission to my husband, to an unreasonable and demanding
boss, and to governing authorities becomes simpler and clearer
when I first choose each day to live in submission to my Heavenly
Father.
8. SERVICE
Practicing the discipline of a life of service is different than
making a choice to serve others. Self-righteous service stems
from human effort, seeks recognition and appreciation, picks
when and whom to serve, and is affected by temporary emotions.
True godly service stems from my relationship with my Father,
is content to be in secret, serves all without regard for position,
and is a life-style, not an isolated event. When we choose to
serve, we are still in charge; when we choose to be a servant we
surrender that right (Matthew 20:26; 23:11; Mark 10:43).
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Jesus modeled the life of service (Mark 10:45), not just by

His death on the cross or by washing His disciples’ feet, but also
by taking time to listen to the hearts of those around Him and
addressing their needs (Luke 7:1-17; Mark 5:1-42). He spent time
with His disciples, eating with them, relaxing with them, teaching
them, answering their questions, and delegating authority to them,
even when they were far from perfect. He served the least – the
children, the women, the demon-possessed, and the outcasts of
society, without regard to His own reputation.
The benefits of a life of true service are humility, self-denial,

and God’s approval.
PART 3: DISCIPLINES OF THE BODY

9. FASTING
The discipline of fasting is to abstain from food (solid or liquid,
but not water) for spiritual purposes. A partial fast is one that
restricts the diet (Daniel 10:3).
Jewish law commanded a public fast once a year, on the Day

of Atonement. In the New Testament there is no command to fast,
but Jesus said that giving, fasting and prayer are acts of devotion
(Matthew 6:1-18). The decision to fast is typically a private
decision, although some churches encourage communal periods
of fasting.
The purpose of fasting is to help us focus on God and
obedience to Him, to reveal things like pride, gluttony, or
anger that control us, to give clarity in guidance, and power in
intercession for people and nations. Instead of eating, the intent
is to spend time in prayer or worship. When your body demands
to be fed, use that as a reminder to pray and allow your spirit to
rule over your body. One suggestion from my own experience is
the importance of monitoring your heart attitude while fasting; it is
easy to become grumpy or testy in your interactions with others
rather than more saintly (Isaiah 58:4,6-8).
In his book, “The Celebration of Discipline,” Richard Foster

suggests that those who are practicing this discipline for the first
43
NOTES time start once a week for several weeks

with a 24-hour partial fast from lunch one
day to lunch the next day, drinking fruit
juice, and breaking the fast with fresh fruits
and vegetables at lunch the second day.
Then try a normal fast of 24 hours drinking
lots of water. For longer fasts it is wise to
either read the advice of others or talk to
someone who fasts regularly.
Some Biblical characters who fasted

were Moses, David, Elijah, Daniel, Anna,
Paul and Jesus. Studying what they did,
why they fasted, and the results of their fast
would be an interesting preparation for this
exercise.
10. SIMPLICITY
Simplicity means living with God as the
very center of our lives – not possessions,
not people, not activities, but God Himself.
When we live in simplicity our speech is
truthful and honest. We are not concerned
about gaining status or impressing people.
What we have we make available to
others, because we believe everything we
have is God’s, on loan to us as stewards.
Possessions are genuinely enjoyed, not a
distraction (Ecclesiastes 6:18, 19). We make
our decisions according to what we believe
God wants us to do and, as a result, are
free from being controlled by possessions,
opinions, fear, self-centeredness, worry,
greed and envy. We don’t necessarily have
to give all our possessions to the poor; they
are already given to God, to be enjoyed
and used as He directs. Our children are
not extensions of ourselves or fulfillers
44
of our failed dreams, but gifts from God, to be nurtured, loved,

trained and released for His kingdom.
The discipline of simplicity is to “seek first the kingdom of God

and His righteousness” (Matthew 6:25-33).
11. GRATITUDE
Although gratitude is not usually listed among the “spiritual
disciplines,” there are a sufficient number of Scriptures mentioning
it, that I am convinced of its importance in our spiritual health. We
are to give “thanks always and for everything” (Ephesians 5:20),
to “give thanks in all circumstances” (1 Thessalonians 5:18), and
to “enter his gates with thanksgiving, and his courts with praise”
(Psalm 100:4). What better way to start your day than by thanking
God for five things He has done for you the previous day. It may
be the gift of a family member, the song of a bird, an answered
prayer, health, freedom, protection, a friend’s encouraging
words, an insight from His Word, or the kindness of a stranger.
Throughout the day maintain an attitude of watching for God at
work and circumstances or things for which you can be thankful.
Begin to extend your gratitude to those around you, family

members, co-workers, neighbors, retailers, service personnel, and
those in ministry. Let them know with encouraging words or small
gifts that their work is important to you, and their life is making a
difference in the lives of others.
End your day, as you fall asleep at night, with a grateful heart,
thanking Him even for the difficult circumstances you have
encountered, learning to be “content with weaknesses, insults,
hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak,
then I am strong” (2 Corinthians 12:10).
Ann Voskamp in “One Thousand Gifts” challenged herself

to journal one thousand gifts from God for which she could
be grateful -- a wonderful way to develop the discipline of
maintaining an “attitude of gratitude” (Voskamp, 2010).
45
12. Generosity
“The Lord loves a cheerful giver” (2 Corinthians 9:7). Someone
has said we are never more like Him than when we give. It is part of
our DNA, because He is Our Father and “God so loved the world that
He gave” (John 3:16).
We typically immediately think of finances when we talk about

giving, but a generous spirit inspires us to give far beyond opening
our wallets. Yes, God wants us to give to the poor. Deuteronomy
15:11 instructs us “Open wide your hand to your brother, to the needy
and to the poor, in your land.” In Ezekiel 16:49 we read that God’s
complaint against Sodom was their failure to take care of the poor.
But God also wants us to be generous with our time, our talents,
our words of encouragement, our possessions, and our wisdom. 1
Timothy 6:18 summarizes it well, “Be generous and ready to share.”
MEMORIZE:
Psalm 119:105 - Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my
path.
Jer. 29:13 - You will seek me and find me, when you seek me
with all your heart.
KEY TRUTH:
There is never a need to be “stuck” in your relationship with God.
He is always waiting patiently for you to seek Him with all your heart
in refreshing ways, in the way you study His Word, spend time with
Him in prayer, express gratitude to Him, journal your quiet time,
or whatever way His Spirit stirs you. Learn to make each day an
adventure with Him leading the way.
YOUR RESPONSE:
1. Consider doing a Bible Study on meditation, what we meditate
on and what results we can expect to receive. Then practice
that spiritual meditation yourself and journal what you learn.
What secrets did you learn that helped you meditate more
successfully? What obstacles did you have to overcome and
46
how did you overcome them?

2. Describe your prayer time. When and where do you pray? Do
you have a pattern in your prayer? Do you journal during or
after prayer? What do you find most difficult about spending
time in prayer? Do you have difficulty praying aloud in front of
others?
3. Consider what you can do to simplify your life. e.g. keep debt
to a minimum, eliminate clutter from your house, sell or give
away what you no longer use.
4. What are some study methods you have found helpful?
5. Do you look forward to “alone” times or does the thought of
being alone make you fearful or anxious? What steps could
you take to learn to enjoy solitude?
6. When is it hardest for you to submit to other people? Do you
know why? How does being a Christian make it easier or
harder for you to submit?
7. Where are you currently serving? Ask yourself if you are
choosing to serve or choosing to be a servant. The difference
is the amount of control you have.
FOR FURTHER STUDY:

Celebration of Discipline by Richard Foster (Foster, 1988)
My Heart Christ’s Home by Robert Boyd Munger (Munger, 1992)
Intercession, Thrilling and Fulfilling by Joy Dawson (Dawson, 1997)
Prayers That Avail Much by Germaine Copeland (Copeland, 2005)
Secrets of Powerful Prayer by Hammond and Cameneti (Hammond &
Cameneti, 2000)
One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp (Voskamp, 2010)
Free Bible Study internet sites:
www.biblegateway.com
www.blueletterbible.com
www.netbible.org
www.e-sword.net
www.lovegodgreatly.com
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LESSON 6: SERVANT LEADERSHIP
My personal leadership journey began when I, as a pastor’s

daughter, began to serve in various capacities in the church, helping
in the nursery, in children’s ministry, choir, youth ministry, teaching
Sunday School, playing the piano, even cleaning up after church
dinners. Serving in various capacities was fun; I enjoyed learning,
and I loved to teach. The progression to more responsible positions
during my college years was natural. I never felt the need to be the
“president” or “vision-caster,” but was content to support leadership
and serve. Ten years of being a mom to two little boys taught me a
lot about leadership and serving, but it was during my twenty years
in the corporate world, as I rose through the ranks of team leader,
supervisor and then manager that my leadership style emerged. I
was definitely not the traditional top-down manager in the male-
dominated oil industry, but I learned that the people in my department
functioned most effectively when they were given clear goals and I
did everything in my power to remove the hindrances that kept them
from accomplishing those objectives. I became familiar with the term
“servant leader,” and would have given myself that description based
48
on what I knew, but somewhere deep inside I always considered

myself a “second-rate” leader, one who was not born with natural
leadership abilities, but learned to function in that capacity. Then I
read Robert Greenleaf’s definitive work “Servant Leadership” and
was stunned by the following:
The servant leader is servant first. … It begins with the natural

feeling that one wants to serve, to serve first. Then conscious
choice brings one to aspire to lead. That person is sharply
different from the one who is leader first … The difference
manifests itself in the care taken by the servant-first to make
sure that other people’s highest priority needs are being served.
The best test … is this: Do those served grow as persons? Do
they, while being served become healthier, wiser, freer, more
autonomous, more likely themselves to become servants?
(Greenleaf, 1977, p. 27)
He was saying that I, as a servant leader, was not a “second-

class” leader! That thought was a “light bulb” moment for me. I
began to understand leadership from a completely different
perspective.
Many women, like me, have learned the “servant” role well, even
enjoyed meeting the needs of others. Is God now calling you to
make that “conscious choice” to “aspire to lead”? I would encourage
you to take that leap of faith. Volunteer to lead a small group or teach
a Bible Study, organize an event or put together a project team to
accomplish a task. If God is calling you, He will equip you to do it!!
Some people would argue that the concepts of servant and

leader are at opposite ends of the spectrum. How can one be both
a servant and a leader? Jesus’ response to that question is found in
Luke 22:26. “[L]et the greatest among you become as the youngest,
and the leader as one who serves.” He not only confirmed it with
His words, “the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and
to give his life as a ransom for many” (Matthew 20:28), but He also
modeled it for us during His life on earth.
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NOTES I. JESUS AS SERVANT LEADER

Was Jesus a true “servant leader” by
today’s definition? “A servant-leader --- seeks
to draw out, inspire, and develop the best and
highest within people from the inside out”
(Spears, 1998, p. xii). He certainly was by that
standard! What about other servant leader
characteristics (Spears, 1998, pp. 4 - 6)? Here
are some examples:
1. Listening: Servant leaders listen
carefully to the ideas, concerns, and
hearts of those they lead. Jesus
listened to those to who came to Him,
answering their questions, even when it
was inconvenient (John 3: 1 – 21; John 4:
7 – 42).
2. Empathy (Compassion): Jesus had
compassion for all He led (Matthew
9:36; Luke 7:13).
3. Healing: Servant leaders help make the
people they lead whole. “God anointed
Jesus of Nazareth with the Holy
Spirit and with power. He went about
doing good and healing all who were
oppressed by the devil” (Acts 10:38).
4. Awareness: Servant leaders have their
own “inner serenity.” Jesus knew who
He was and where He was going; He
needed no one to confirm it (John 2:24–
25).
5. Persuasion: Servant leaders build
consensus rather than forcing their will
on others. Jesus knew Judas would
betray Him, but allowed Judas to be a
disciple and have responsibility for the
money (Matthew 26:25; John 13:29;
17:12).
6. Conceptualization: Servant leaders
50
balance physical day-to-day realities with ideas beyond what

can be seen. Jesus frequently preached about the kingdom
of God. “And he went throughout all Galilee, teaching in their
synagogues and proclaiming the gospel of the kingdom and
healing every disease and every affliction among the people”
(Matthew 4:23).
7. Foresight: Servant leaders apply lessons from the past
to present situations and anticipate the consequences of
decisions. Jesus warned His disciples about the difficult times
ahead for Himself and them (Luke 9:44, 45; Matthew 24:1 – 31).
8. Stewardship: Servant leaders are wise stewards of their
resources, committed to serving others. Jesus wisely
stewarded His time. In three years He brought transformation
to the world. He gave to the poor, but allowed the rich to give
to Him (John 13:29; Luke 8:3; Matthew 26:7-12).
9. Commitment to the growth of people: Servant leaders
encourage the personal, professional and spiritual growth of
those they lead. Jesus personally invested His time patiently
teaching, correcting, and training His twelve disciples, pouring
Himself into them (Matthew 10:1; 11:1; 16:24; 20:17).
10. Building community: Servant leaders work to unify their
followers into a cohesive team. Jesus taught His disciples to
love and serve one another. After His death and resurrection,
they met together, united in purpose to communicate the
gospel to the world (John 13:14-16; Matthew 28:19, 20; Acts
2:44 – 47).
What other examples of His servant leadership come to your mind?
II SERVANT LEADERSHIP IN PRACTICE TODAY

1. Listening: Take a personal interest in the people you lead,
their families, likes and dislikes, what causes their spirits to
soar and what troubles their hearts. Be attentive to what they
say and don’t say. Ask them clarifying questions as you seek
to understand their suggestions and ideas. Paul put it this way
“Respect those who labor among you … esteem them very
highly in love because of their work” (1 Thessalonians 5:12–13).
2. Empathy (Compassion): Assume those you lead mean well,
51
even if their behavior or words are unacceptable. Recognize

that “hurting people hurt people,” knowing how and when
to forgive is essential. Demonstrate true compassion for
those who are hurting or going through a time of crisis. At
times that will involve “the ministry of presence,” just sitting
in comfortable silence as they grieve. As women we tend
to want to “do something,” fix a meal, provide childcare, or
clean the house, but what is often needed more is prayerful
companionship. It will take the wisdom and leading of the
Holy Spirit to know which is the true compassionate response
in each situation.
3. Healing: Help those you lead find spiritual, mental, emotional,
and physical wholeness. We may not have the skills to bring
physical healing to the suffering, but if we are intimately
acquainted with “The Great Physician,” we can intercede
on their behalf. To those who are emotionally, spiritually
or mentally wounded, a servant leader will speak words of
blessing, encouragement, and hope.
4. Awareness: Prayerfully acknowledge your own weaknesses,
inadequacies, and sinfulness. As a servant leader, know who
you are and Whose you are – your values, your priorities and
your calling. When the temptation comes to be puffed up
in pride by the praise of others, or shade the truth to make
yourself look better, or surround yourself only with those who
agree with you, allow the Word of God and the presence of
the Holy Spirit to quicken your conscience and guide you back
to truth.
5. Persuasion: Persuading volunteers to faithfully give their time
and talent to accomplish a purpose is a much more difficult
task than persuading an employee you hire to do the same.
Volunteers typically need constant encouragement. They
need to see the significance of the work they are doing. I
have learned that those who are inspired to volunteer
because God has called them to the task have a greater level
of commitment and longevity than those whom you have to
“talk into it.” On the other hand, if someone feels called but
inadequate for the task, persuasion and encouragement
may be essential. Forcing compliance is not an option with
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volunteers! NOTES
6. Conceptualization: Be able to clearly and
concisely articulate the vision God has
given you. That will probably take work
and practice, but it is worth the effort if
those you lead can clearly picture the
end result. That vision will inspire their
creative ideas and energies, and assist
them in decision-making.
7. Foresight/Wisdom: Servant leaders
who can apply lessons from the past to
current situations in order to make wise
decisions avoid many pitfalls. Apply
James 1:5, asking God for wisdom, and
involving others in decision-making to
provide alternative perspectives and
experience. “Without counsel plans fail,
but with many advisers they succeed”
(Proverbs 15:22).
8. Stewardship: Servant leaders use all
resources wisely. Financial resources
are a trust from those who gave. To
build credibility with donors, openly
share how those resources were used
and be accountable. Be respectful of
the time volunteers are donating by
being prepared and organized. Make
an effort to understand the strengths and
weaknesses of volunteers to steward
their talents wisely.
9. Commitment to the growth of people:
Help people identify their strengths
and weaknesses and develop their
gifts by modeling (show), teaching,
coaching (correcting and challenging),
and empowering (delegating) them.
Coaching involves providing feedback
– what they did well and how they could
53
have improved. Inspire them to discover their values, their

passion and their calling. Demonstrate your own willingness
to keep learning and growing, even if it demonstrates your
inabilities.
10. Building community: A servant leader demonstrates
unconditional love for those they lead. The most powerful way
to build community is to personally model that unconditional
love, as you live a life of transparency, integrity, and joy with
one another. You can verbally encourage them to support
and help one another, and you should, but showing them
what that looks like by genuinely demonstrating that love for
them yourself is much more effective and powerful. And don’t
forget to have fun together! Let them know you enjoy your
time together.
Don’t be discouraged if you don’t see immediate results with

servant leadership. In his Foreword for the book “Insights on
Leadership,” Stephen Covey compares servant leadership to the
Chinese bamboo tree.
You plant it and see nothing but a small shoot above the
ground for four years. During those four years the root
structure is developing deep inside the soil – yet you see
nothing. You work diligently all the while. In the fifth year the
Chinese bamboo tree grows 80 feet. (Spears, 1998, p. xviii)
MEMORIZE:
Mark 10:45 - For even the Son of Man came not to be served
but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.
Matthew 25:40 - And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to
you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you
did it to me.’
KEY TRUTH:
The servant leader is first a servant who then makes a conscious
choice to lead.
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YOUR RESPONSE:
1. Do you consider yourself to be a servant leader? Why or why not?
Which comes more easily to you – serving or leading?
2. Which of the ten principles of servant leadership do you find most

challenging and which comes most easily?
3. Do you think servant leadership does not work well in some

cultures?
FOR FURTHER STUDY:

Servant Leadership by Robert Greenleaf (Greenleaf, 1977)
Insights on Leadership by Larry Spears (Spears, 1998)
Leading From the Heart by Jack Kahl (Kahl & Donelan, 2004)
55
CHAPTER 7: VALUES, PRIORITIES, BALANCE
Jesus’ parable of the talents in Matthew 25:14 – 30 has always

been a little intimidating to me. I recognized early in life the “talents”
God had given me, but the question that haunted me whenever I
read the parable was, “God, what are you expecting from me? I
don’t want to be the servant who buried her talent.” It seemed like
in every season of life there were abilities that I had used, but were
now lying dormant, or gifts that I suspected God had placed in me
that I had never discovered or developed. It has actually only been
in this current season of life, that I have sensed God urging me to go
back and pick up some of those “dropped threads,” so He can weave
them into a completed tapestry. What are the talents and abilities that
God has placed within you that He wants you to use for expanding
His Kingdom? Perhaps you are feeling stretched too thinly at times
with so many things, and that is just to get the daily chores done. I
would encourage you to keep your eyes and your spirit open to see
what God wants to do through you. This is a lesson about time, about
priorities and balance, and about discovering what is truly valuable
from God’s perspective.
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I. KNOW YOUR VALUES

What do you value most in life? What makes you happy and fulfills
you? Write down three or four things, but don’t make it complicated
or phony. Don’t over-think it or ask others what they think should
be important to you. Just be honest with yourself. This is for your
eyes only, an acknowledgement of what you know to be true in
your heart. If you don’t know where to start, ask God for wisdom
and clarity. Don’t worry if you don’t get it right the first time or if you
get interrupted and don’t finish it in one sitting, but keep your list in
a place where you can revise it, clarify it, and simplify it over time.
Ultimately your values should be simple, clear statements of what
matters most to you.
By way of example, this is how I personally recently answered

that question:
o My relationship with God and family
o Empowering others: loving, teaching, encouraging,
extending grace
o Challenging work with achievable goals
o Freedom to exercise honesty, integrity, justice, humility
Why write your values? Being able to clearly express them will
help guide you in decision-making as well as your daily behavior.
II. ESTABLISH AND LIVE BY YOUR PRIORITIES

For most Christian adults the top five priorities in life are: God,
spouse, children, work, and church. Typically, other priorities such as
other family members, friends, self, hobbies, education, etc. fall further
down the list, but you may have extenuating circumstances such as
a small or disabled child or an aging parent that would elevate that
individual for a season of life.
First: What does it mean that God is my number one priority?

My relationship with Him comes first in my life. That does not mean
I neglect my family responsibilities and spend a large portion of my
day in my prayer closet, but I daily seek His will and obey His Word
so I can more effectively help my husband and parent my children.
Briefly put, I live first and foremost before my Audience of One and
57
seek to please Him.
Second: My spouse is next. My commitment to him is for a

lifetime and my children are on loan to me from God usually for
twenty years or less. If my children become second or first place, my
relationships with them will become strained with a weight they are
not intended to bear.
Third: My goal as a parent is to raise a spiritually, financially,

emotionally, and philosophically independent and responsible adult
who loves and serves God. “Bring them up in the discipline and
instruction of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4). They are not my “trophy” to
give me bragging rights, nor are they proof of my excellent parenting
skills (or lack thereof). They are individuals, made in the image
of God, who make their own choices, set their own priorities, and
prayerfully establish their own relationship with their Heavenly Father,
the only One to whom they will answer.
Fourth and Fifth: For me personally, work and church have been
“balanced” priorities. At times church has been a higher priority and
at other times work has been a higher priority, depending on my role
and the responsibilities at that particular time. With regard to church, I
believe we are not to neglect meeting together, since God has called
us to live in community with those who share our faith (Hebrews
10:25). Our love for one another in the body of Christ is evidence of
our discipleship, as is the excellence of our work (John 13:35; 1 Peter
2:18; Colossians 3:23).
There may be seasons in our lives when we are forced through

circumstances or led by the Spirit of God to temporarily make
adjustments, but these are general guidelines useful as a starting
point in establishing our priorities.
A more difficult question is whether the way we spend our time

reflects those priorities. Each day is a gift from God for which we are
accountable. We will never be given that particular day again. How
we spend our time matters to Him (Psalm 90:12).
Numerous business books have been written suggesting effective
58
time management strategies and there are NOTES

businesses that specialize in paper, electronic
devices, and computer software to help you
organize your time more efficiently, but in the
end I have found the only essentials are: a few
basic principles, a calendar, a notepad, and a
heart tuned to the Holy Spirit.
1. Use a simple chart or calendar to list and
block off hours for all the non-negotiable
time in your week. Include things like
eating, sleeping, working, exercising,
devotional time, church activities, daily
and weekly household chores, grocery
shopping, and any weekly or monthly
commitments. Reserve Sunday as a
day of rest or relaxation with family if
possible. The white space you have
left is the time you have for any “extra”
activities. When someone asks you to
do something for them or with them, or
you decide to “sleep in,” no problem.
Just realize it comes out of your “white-
space” time for the week.
2. Next spend some time creatively
planning and organizing the routine
tasks such as household chores to
minimize the time you spend on them.
There is a principle that says a job
will take the amount of time you allot
for it. Pray for wisdom! If you have
already run out of hours in the week,
what could you delegate to other family
members? What activities could you
combine, simplify, or eliminate? All of us
have “prime time” when we work most
efficiently. For some, that time is in the
morning and for others it may come later
in the day or the middle of the night.
59
Identify what hours you are most efficient and choose carefully
what you schedule during that time. Identify the “timewasters”
that consume your day -- lack of organization, interruptions,
crises, procrastination, and failure to plan.
3. The goal of this exercise is to create more “white space” for
the “critical but not urgent” tasks that we all tend to postpone
indefinitely, things like reading a book that feeds your spirit,
cleaning out a closet, having coffee with a friend. Carefully
choose how to spend your “white space” time, accepting new
responsibilities prayerfully and understanding what you are
giving up to do so.
Now you are running with purpose (1 Corinthians 9:24-27)!
III. THE BALANCING ACT

One of the most difficult issues women say they face today is
leading a balanced life, juggling responsibilities at work, home,
and church – trying to do it all well and to be honest, trying to keep
everyone happy. For me personally, life became much simpler
and more balanced when I realized it was neither my job nor my
responsibility to make other people happy. That could only come
from their relationship with God. I could provide healthy meals, a
loving home, comfort, encouragement, wisdom, and hope, but I could
not make them happy. For me, balance came when I understood
I lived my life before an Audience of One, not pleasing myself or
others, but God Himself. At times that meant choosing to attend
my son’s soccer game rather than a church prayer meeting or a
“relationship-building” work event; at other times it meant preparing
a family meal the night before so I could travel the next day for a
work commitment or hosting a home Bible Study instead of working
late. Every day was a balancing act, a prayerful adventure. Yes,
there were failures and challenges along the way, but in the end I can
truthfully say He faithfully guided me through the steps of my journey
– with no regrets.
Were there times when I made mistakes? Absolutely! I learned

that when I felt stressed, when I was abrupt with my children or my
employees, when my mind was still racing as I was lying in bed trying
to sleep, it was usually because my priorities were out of alignment.
60
It was time to find a quiet place for reflection, repentance, and

readjustment. “God, you know there are only 24 hours in the day. I
can’t do all this. What am I doing that you have not called me to do?
What is the most important thing for me to do next?” My life had
drifted out of balance, usually because I had allowed the “urgent” or
the “unimportant” things to take precedence over my priorities and
values.
If you are struggling to find balance in your life, feeling

overwhelmed with a longer to-do list than hours in the day, I would
encourage you to take some time to prayerfully seek the Lord
about what changes need to be made in your life. Jesus says, “My
yoke is easy and my burden is light” (Matthew 11:30). If your yoke of
responsibility is more than you can bear with no end in sight, perhaps
you have taken on more than He has called you to do. Consult with
immediate family and trusted advisors. They may be able to offer a
fresh perspective. Are you in a spiritual battle waging war with the
enemy of your soul? Are you seeking status or position more than
God’s plan? Have you taken on responsibilities He has never called
you to assume? Only you and God can answer that question; He is
waiting for you to ask!
“It is the work that God does through us that counts, not what we
do for Him.” (Chambers, 1992, p. August 30)
MEMORIZE:
Psalm 90:12 - So teach us to number our days that we may
get a heart of wisdom.
Prov. 24:3, 4 - By wisdom a house is built and by
understanding it is established; by knowledge the rooms are
filled with all precious and pleasant riches.
KEY TRUTH:
Knowing our values and establishing our priorities according to God’s
Word are essential if we are going lead a balanced life from God’s
perspective.
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YOUR RESPONSE:
1. Write down your current version of your values and keep it in
a visible location where you can reference it daily and update it
periodically.
2. Are there gifts and abilities that you suspect God might want you
to use in this season, but you have never developed them because
you lacked the time or the resources to do so? If so, what are they?
What steps can you take (beginning with prayer) to start opening
those doors?
3. Identify those things that you regret you agreed to do. Fulfill those
near term commitments that are a one-time event. Start to prayerfully
work on plans to “ease out” of the other commitments on your list.
You may be able to find someone who would love to fill your spot, or
you may have to have a conversation with the individual to whom you
gave the commitment and work a phasing out timeline with them, or
God may give you another creative solution. Start the identification
process and prayer today!
For Further Study:

Margin by Richard Swenson (Swenson & Swenson, 2002)
The Balanced Life by Alan Loy McGinnis (McGinnis, 1997)
The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Steven Covey
(Covey, 1989)
Time Management from the Inside Out by Julie Morgenstern
(Morgenstern, 2000)
Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World by Joanna Weaver (Weaver,
2000)
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LESSON 8: COMMUNICATIONS, PERSONALITIES,
RELATIONSHIPS
Nothing is more crucial to successful leadership than

communicating effectively, and nothing is more crucial to effective
communications than understanding your audience. Communicating
involves more than talking; it is body language, tone, and most
importantly, clarity -- making certain what you say is what your listener
hears. You can talk, but if the hearer does not speak your language
or understand what you are saying, you have not communicated.
In this lesson we will also suggest that not only is the language of
the hearer important, but also their personality. Two people can hear
the same message from the same person, but interpret the message
very differently depending on their personality. We’ll cover four
different personality types or “temperaments” that were identified by
Hippocrates more than two thousand years ago, and remain basically
the same today.
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NOTES An understanding of both communication

skills and personalities, are essential if we
are going to build a team that has meaningful
relationships with one another.
1. COMMUNICATIONS
As leaders we usually think
communications is about how we can more
effectively get our point across to those
we lead. There is power in an eloquently
delivered inspirational speech to thousands,
but there is also strong relational power in the
simple act of listening, one on one. Only if we
listen to our hearers will we know if we are
actually communicating clearly.
Steven Covey in “The Seven Habits of

Highly Effective People” emphasizes the
importance of listening in his fifth habit: “Seek
first to understand, then to be understood”
(Covey, 1989). He points out that frequently,
instead of listening to other people, we
are mentally preparing our response. He
suggests that we would be far more effective
communicators if we listened carefully enough
to rephrase what the other person said to be
certain we understood them. For example,
we could say, “I think you are saying … Am I
understanding you correctly?” When I first
learned this principle I had an immediate
opportunity to try it out with my sons who, at
the time, were teenagers with very different
perspectives and personalities. One evening
when emotions began to rise during a lively
dinner-table discussion, I asked each of them
to use Covey’s technique. That led to a very
different conversation!
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LESSON 8: COMMUNICATIONS, PERSONALITIES, RELATIONSHIPS
Leaders who promote new and challenging ideas can always

anticipate feedback – compliments and criticisms. How you as a
leader listen and respond to both types of feedback will communicate
your leadership style. You can smile and nod and say nothing (and
learn nothing) or you can listen carefully and seek to understand
the thoughts behind the comments. In the case of compliments, by
listening you will better understand exactly what was helpful, and in
the case of negative comments, you may discover they have a valid
point! It is important to note that the person who shares negative
feedback offers you a gift; she can share her thoughts with you and
give you the opportunity to clarify or she may spread her negativity to
her twenty closest friends. Always receive the gift of feedback, both
types, with gratitude and comprehension.
Leaders are often called upon to personally respond to those

they lead in times of grief or crisis, but frequently receive little or no
training in what to say or do. Not wanting to say or do the wrong
thing, they often avoid the situation altogether. An organization called
Stephen Ministry provides excellent training resources in this area
and makes the simple suggestion of “the ministry of presence.” Just
being present and listening or sitting quietly with the hurting person is
deeply appreciated and a rare gift.
Listening is crucial, but at the same time, I don’t want to minimize

the importance of being able to clearly speak what God has put on
your heart. Here are a few tips:
a. If you want honest feedback on your delivery style, teach
a classroom of children. They will let you know if you are
boring, long-winded, or lack passion!
b. Practice, practice, practice! I have read that Billy Graham
used to preach to tree stumps. My dad taught me to
practice in front of a mirror so I could see any hand
movements or behaviors that might be distracting.
c. Keep it simple! That does not mean you don’t have to
prepare. In fact, it means you have to over-prepare, and
condense the content of your message to three or at most
four important well-illustrated points.
d. Don’t worry if you are nervous. My dad, a pastor for nearly
65
70 years who often preached four or five times a week,

once told me that every time he preached he felt nervous.
It’s when you are confident in your own ability and not
recognizing that you are dependent on the anointing of the
Holy Spirit that you are in trouble.
e. Ask the Lord to help you be a clear channel for His
love and truth to flow, a clear glass for His light to shine.
Your emotions at the end of your message or the non-
responsiveness of your audience are not necessarily a
good indication of whether the message has been clearly
communicated. A completely silent group of listeners may
indicate that the Word is being sown without distractions.
Trust God to accomplish His purpose and the Holy Spirit to
bring truth to the hearers.
2. PERSONALITY TYPES
The goal of understanding personality types is not to sort people
into neat boxes of right and wrong, but to better understand why we
respond and think the way we do and why others respond and think
so differently. As we learn about others, we begin to recognize that
our way might not be the only right way, and different perspectives in
planning and problem solving will lead to better results as we work or
live together.
There are multiple approaches to classifying personality types, but

most suggest four different categories. Three of the most common
methods for characterizing personalities and the four classifications of
each are:
DISC – dominance, influence, compliance, supportive
Hippocrates – choleric, sanguine, melancholy, phlegmatic
Colors – Red, Yellow, Blue, Green
I have listed the classifications in the same order in each of these
methods.
In the following very abbreviated explanation, I have chosen

to use the “color” breakdown, primarily because it was the one
I first encountered in a supervisory workshop by Management
Technologies, Inc. Before we begin, let me add that most people
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are a combination of all four types with differing strengths in each

category.
Red (dominance, choleric) -- Goal Driven
o Clues: straightforward, decisive, competitive, willing to
take risks, enjoy being in charge, like direct answers,
freedom from controls, have goals
o Make decisions by trial and error, evaluating for results
o If you are red, beware of: making impulsive decisions,
being harsh and demanding, failing to listen
o In communicating with a red: point out the major pros
and cons of a decision and get to the bottom line
quickly, don’t be easily offended
o Reds struggle with relationships. Suggestions: keep
your advice until asked, don’t look down on others,
readily admit your faults, be quick to apologize
Yellow (influence, sanguine) -- Relationship Driven
o Clues: sociable, fun-loving, adapt to change readily,
enjoy working in groups, good story-tellers and
coaches
o Make decisions by listening to opinions and coming to
consensus
o If you are yellow, beware of: trying to please everyone,
disorganization, being easily distracted, exaggerating,
manipulating
o In communicating with a yellow: help them stay
focused, talk through their problems, expect confusion,
lateness, relationship-building time
o Yellows struggle with talking too much and being self-
centered. Suggestions: condense your comments,
don’t exaggerate, listen to others, work at improving
organizational skills
Blue (compliance, melancholy) –- Information Driven
o Clues: seek and absorb information, like to learn, plan,
develop, assess, enjoy creative and innovative projects,
thinking
o Make decisions by: gathering information and
evaluating all options
o If you are blue, beware of: over-analyzing information,
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delaying decision-making, valuing logic and reason

over the spiritual
o In communicating with a blue: help them work through
the alternatives, be patient in decision-making, listen to
their reasoning
o Blues struggle with depression and perfectionism:
Suggestions: develop an attitude of gratitude, look at
the positives, develop mercy for the mistakes of others
and yourself, build your faith and trust in God
Green (supportive, phlegmatic) Methodology-Driven
o Clues: reserved, cautious, detail-oriented, follow
traditions, policies and procedures, like direction and
instruction
o Make decisions by: getting the details, defining the
problem, getting historical data, developing methods,
documenting everything
o If you are green, beware of: over-control, under-
delegation, being inflexible and unwilling to change,
over-estimating risks
o In communicating with a green: encourage creativity,
express confidence in them, provide documentation,
structure and order
o Greens struggle with lack of passion and resistance
to change. Suggestions: Encourage them to try new
things, to find what they are passionate about, to be
pro-active in addressing issues, adapt to change
Another very different approach in understanding people is one

that originated with the Desert Fathers, Christians who withdrew to
the desert in the third century in order to draw closer to God. This
is the Enneagram approach. More information can be found online;
secular groups also use this approach.
3. RELATIONSHIPS
In His teachings Jesus spent a great deal of time talking about
relationships. Why was it so important to Him? Our relationships
with one on another are a reflection of our relationship with God.
We cannot say we love God and hate our sister (1 John 2:9). When
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asked which is the great commandment, Jesus NOTES

responded with two: “Love the Lord your God,
… and love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew
22:36 – 39).
The New Testament gives us other

relationship instructions as well:
“Be kind to one another, tender-hearted,
forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave
you” (Ephesians 4:32).
“Do not let the sun go down on your anger”
(Ephesians 4:26).
“Love your enemies and pray for those who
persecute you” (Matthew 5:44).
Multiple times in the New Testament we are
instructed to live in peace with others (Romans
12:18; 2 Corinthians 13:11, Hebrews 12:14). But
people can be difficult, sometimes impossible!
How do we deal with difficult people? Typically,
we choose one of three ways – avoidance,
attack, or making peace. Scripture clearly
advocates the last.
Whether the situation is one you are

personally dealing with, or you are helping
to mediate a conflict between two group
members, the basic principles are the same.
Start by taking a step back and assessing the
problem. When do problems arise? Look for
common threads and pray for wisdom and
discernment.
a. Is this a clash of personalities,
a difference in values, goals or
expectations, or perhaps just a plain
misunderstanding based on poor
communications or misinformation?
Take time to reflect and pray about the
situation. Ask God for His perspective,
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insight, and timing. If the issue is a clash of personalities,

resolution could lead to a strong complementary relationship
that is beneficial for all, e.g. Paul and Barnabas. If the issue is a
difference in values or goals, each must seek the Lord and find
His will. If the issue is poor communications or misinformation,
talking the issues through will generally bring clarity and
agreement so we can walk in the light together (1 John 1:7).
b. Is this spiritual warfare? Perhaps a spirit of division is at work,
or some other spiritual attack external to both of you, lies sown
by the enemy to create conflict and destroy God’s work. If so,
break down the walls between the two of you by open and
honest conversation and pray together against the enemy
(Ephesians 6:12).
c. Is this relationship breakdown the result of sin, either yours or
the other person’s? Perhaps sins and hurts from the past are
clouding judgment or evoking negative emotional responses
that are disproportionate to any spoken words or actions.
“What causes quarrels and what causes fights among you? Is
it not this, that your passions are at war within you” (James 4:1)?
Peacemaker Ministries suggests four biblical steps to conflict

resolution:
i. Glorify God. Believe God can use this conflict for good
(Romans 8:28).
ii. Get the log out of your own eye (Matthew 7:5). Meditate
on Philippians 4:2-9.
iii. Gently restore. Seek restoration, not condemnation
(Matthew 18:15 – 18).
iv. Go and be reconciled. Forgive as God has forgiven you
(Colossians 3:12 – 14) (Sande, 2014).
Whether the other person acknowledges their role in the conflict

or not, we are commanded by God to forgive if we want to be
forgiven (Matthew 6:15). If this is an area where you are struggling,
there are reading suggestions and websites at the end of this
chapter.
For certain personality types, there is a great temptation to avoid

70
confrontation and just “hope it all goes away with time.” I freely admit
I have been one of those people. At the same time, I have learned
from experience that rarely does the problem just “go away.” More
frequently it is temporarily buried, only to erupt, typically when it is
least convenient. If the problem comes to mind repeatedly and you
begin to find yourself avoiding the other person, it needs to be dealt
with, prayerfully, honestly, and respectfully in direct communication
with the other individual, preferably in a face to face setting.
MEMORIZE:
Romans 12:18 - If possible, so far as it depends on you, live
peaceably with all.
Ephesians 4:32 - Be kind to one another, tenderhearted,
forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.
KEY TRUTH:
Understanding the diversity of communication styles and
personalities is essential in building strong relationships and
community.
YOUR RESPONSE:
1. Which personality style do you think most closely identifies you
and each of your family members. If you have access to the internet
and have never taken a personality test, take the free one offered at
discpersonalitytesting.com/free-disc-test.
2. In upcoming conversations try the methodology of listening

carefully and clarifying understanding before responding. Don’t
be surprised if it feels awkward and cumbersome at first. As with
many things, you will get better at it with practice. If you are giving
instructions to someone you are working with, ask them to repeat to
you what they heard. It may surprise you!
3. Is there someone whom you find yourself avoiding because

of a previous misunderstanding? Try following the “4 G’s” of
peacemaking, being mindful of God’s leading with regard to timing.
71
FOR FURTHER STUDY:

www.peacemaker.net
www.stephenministries.org
www.enneagram.com
The Friendship Factor by Alan Loy McGinnis (McGinnis, 1979)
Speaking the Truth in Love by Koch & Haugk (Koch & Haugk, 1992)
Forgive and Forget by Lewis Smedes (Smedes, 1984)
Managing Conflict God’s Way by Deborah Smith Pegues (Pegues,
1997)
Personalysis – Management Technologies (Noland, 2015)
Personality Plus – Florence Littauer (Littauer, 1986)
LifeKeys – Kise, Stark, Hirsh (Kise, Stark, & Hirsh, 1996)
The Seven Basic Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R.
Covey (Covey, 1989)
72
LESSON 9: LEADING WHERE GOD HAS PLACED YOU
Few of us are born into positions of leadership like Prince William

of England, and few are naturally gifted leaders (though some
personalities might claim that title), but for most of us leadership
evolves slowly, methodically, with wisdom gained by experience,
reflection, and observation. So how does one begin this journey
of leadership? Start by leading where God has placed you. As
mentioned previously, my early experiences in leadership came
through volunteering to help in church and student activities, typically
under adult supervision through my teen years. The leadership
lessons learned during those early years were invaluable – how
to respond to criticism and rejection, the importance of building a
team, and laying the foundation for an organization that lasts. One
of the most important leadership roles of my life came in my twenties
when I became a Mom. Later in life, during my corporate career as
a manager I remember telling my boss that “everything I needed to
know to do this job I learned when I was home for ten years with
my two boys.” Don’t underestimate the significance of leadership
lessons learned early in life. As you become more intentional in your
73
leadership roles, I suggest you consider these four principles.
1. HAVE A VISION
What are you trying to accomplish when you lead? Are you trying
to solve a problem, provide focus or direction, explore an opportunity,
or fill a perceived leadership vacuum? In order to inspire people
to follow, you must be able to clearly communicate the vision that
inspires you to lead. You may be responding to divine inspiration,
your observation of a need, or an invitation from someone in
authority. Moses had a vision of liberating the Israelites from slavery.
Unfortunately, his initial efforts ended with him fleeing for his life to
the backside of the desert for forty years. You are in good company
if your early experiences of leadership end in failure. Just don’t give
up! John Maxwell advises us to “fail forward,” learn from our mistakes
(2000).
2. KNOW YOURSELF
Romans 12:3 encourages us not to think more highly of ourselves
than we ought. But in leadership it is essential that we know our
strengths and especially our weaknesses – our strengths so we can
build on them and our weaknesses so we can determine how we will
compensate for them.
a. Know your strengths. In chapter 3 we talked about our
gifts and passions. Those are an excellent starting point
for thinking about your strengths. What positive things do
people say about you at work, at church, at home, and in
the community, particularly those people who know you
best? Think of 4 or 5 things you like to do and think you
do well. When you think about the leadership situation
you are currently contemplating, how are those strengths
demonstrated?
b. Know your weaknesses. When you fail, what is generally
the reason? What negative things do people usually say
about you? What types of situations do you tend to avoid if
possible? Think of 4 or 5 weaknesses that challenge you.
How might they limit your leadership effectiveness in your
current situation? What could you do to compensate for
those weaknesses?
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c. Know your heart motivation. As you NOTES

think about “leading where God has
placed you,” what is your underlying
motivation? To be in control? To
serve the needs of the people? To
win the attention or affection of
others? What place do pride, greed,
envy, and other “lusts of the flesh”
play in your desire? Be honest with
yourself and with God.
Moses changed during his forty years in

the desert. No longer the Prince of Egypt,
he became a shepherd. No longer an angry
avenger, he became a meek desert-dweller.
Instead of being a man who was “mighty in his
words” (Acts 7:22), he described himself as
“slow of speech and tongue” (Exodus 4:10). His
strengths had become his weakness, but now,
in God’s eyes, he was ready to lead.
3. HEAR GOD’S CALL

The great leaders of the Bible, Abraham,
Moses, Joshua, Gideon, David, Peter, Paul, Old
Testament and New, all had one characteristic
in common. At some point in each of their lives,
they said, “yes” to God’s call. None of them
were necessarily outstanding or remarkable
individuals, in fact several of them considered
themselves poorly qualified for leadership, and
yet, they were willing to be obedient to God’s
call. We may feel inadequate when God says
to us, as He did to Moses, “What is that in your
hand?” (Ex. 4: 2). The question is whether we
will be willing to choose to step out in faith
and obedience and use what we have for
Him. As a child, one of my favorite choruses
was “Shamgar had an oxgoad, David had a
75
sling, Dorcas had a needle, Rahab had some string, Samson had a
jawbone, Aaron had a rod, Mary had some ointment and they all were
used of God.” What’s in your hand?
4. BUILD A TEAM
One of the most important early leadership tasks is to build a team
who will share the journey with you. How do you select them? Look
for people of integrity who are committed to truth-telling even when
it hurts, people who have captured the vision and are passionate
about seeing it come to pass, people who are wise enough to see
the pitfalls you might miss, people whose strengths are in your areas
of weakness, people to whom you are willing to be accountable
because you trust their judgment and their loyalty, people to whom
you are willing to give the authority to correct you when you are
wrong, people with whom you can share your heart freely and know
that they will love you in spite of your shortcomings. The number
of people close to you does not have to be large. After a night of
prayer, Jesus chose twelve of those who were following him, but was
closest to only three. Moses chose only his brother Aaron, whom
he barely knew, but was selected by God as his partner. Build your
team slowly and prayerfully. Be committed to loving, developing,
and serving them, not just using them to accomplish your purposes.
Frequently team building starts with a one-on-one mentoring
relationship, hearing one another’s hearts and life stories, and slowly
building trust and confidence.
Where has God placed you? Has He given you a vision

that He wants you to accomplish? Have you spent time in His
presence identifying your strengths and weaknesses, examining the
motivations of your heart? Has He called you and assured you that
now is the time answer His call? Has He placed trustworthy people in
your circle of influence?
MEMORIZE:
Romans 12:3 - 8 - For by the grace given to me I say to
everyone among you not to think of himself more highly than
he ought to think, but to think with sober judgment, each
according to the measure of faith that God has assigned. For
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as in one body we have many members, and the members

do not all have the same function, 5 so we, though many, are
one body in Christ, and individually members one of another.
6
Having gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let
us use them: if prophecy, in proportion to our faith; 7 if service,
in our serving; the one who teaches, in his teaching; 8 the one
who exhorts, in his exhortation; the one who contributes, in
generosity; the one who leads, with zeal; the one who does
acts of mercy, with cheerfulness.
1 Corinthians 12:4–11 - 4 Now there are varieties of gifts, but the
same Spirit; 5 and there are varieties of service, but the same
Lord; 6 and there are varieties of activities, but it is the same
God who empowers them all in everyone. 7 To each is given
the manifestation of the Spirit for the common good. 8 For
to one is given through the Spirit the utterance of wisdom,
and to another the utterance of knowledge according to the
same Spirit, 9 to another faith by the same Spirit, to another
gifts of healing by the one Spirit, 10 to another the working
of miracles, to another prophecy, to another the ability to
distinguish between spirits, to another various kinds of
tongues, to another the interpretation of tongues. 11 All these
are empowered by one and the same Spirit, who apportions to
each one individually as he wills.
KEY TRUTH:
If you believe God is calling you to lead, start by being a faithful,
committed, and cheerful follower of a good leader who mentors,
shares information, and delegates responsibility and authority. In
most cases leadership will follow naturally.
YOUR RESPONSE:
1. Observe the leaders around you at work, at church, in your
community, and in your family, looking for someone who commands
the respect and affection of those around them. If no such person
exists in your circle of influence, start reading biographies of good
leaders you admire. Journal what you learn from these people of
influence.
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2. Reflect on your past experiences as a leader at home, in the

church, in school, at work, in your community, in your extended family.
You may be surprised at how many leadership experiences you have
already had. What have you learned from each of those experiences,
both the successes and the failures?
3. Rate your leadership skills in the following categories:

(1= low, 5 = high)
Trustworthy 1 2 3 4 5
Fair 1 2 3 4 5
Humble 1 2 3 4 5
Good listener 1 2 3 4 5
Open-minded 1 2 3 4 5
Compassionate 1 2 3 4 5
Wise 1 2 3 4 5
Creative 1 2 3 4 5
Visionary 1 2 3 4 5
Flexible, Adaptable 1 2 3 4 5
Motivates others 1 2 3 4 5
Makes good, timely decisions 1 2 3 4 5
4. Consider doing a reality check by asking a close friend to discuss

your evaluation with you (or ask several to anonymously complete an
evaluation for you). For those areas where you rate 3 or lower, what
will you do to either raise your score or supplement your weakness
with someone on your team?
FOR FURTHER STUDY:

The Will to Lead by Marvin Bower (Bower, 1997)
Leading from the Heart by Jack Kahl (Kahl & Donelan, 2004)
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LESSON 10: TEAMWORK – THE KEY
As we study Scripture and the character of God, we cannot help

but notice that God is never interested in sacrificing the future for
the short-term “flashy” results of the present. Way back in the days
of Abraham He clearly had a plan for communicating His love to
the world. It involved a covenant with one man who would faithfully
communicate his faith to his family, and his descendants would reach
the world (Genesis 18: 18, 19). He chose a tiny, strategically placed
nation as His people. Jesus followed that pattern. He started His
ministry in a rural community far from the religious atmosphere of
Jerusalem, with a non-descript band of fishermen, tax collectors, and
societal outcasts. How did He then develop a team that changed the
world and still inspires leaders and followers today?
1. PRAYERFULLY CHOOSE TEAM MEMBERS

In the last chapter I suggested that you start to find your team
members by observing their character. Are they people you can
trust? Are they honest, hardworking, willing to be corrected, eager to
learn, passionate in their relationship with God, joyful in spirit, truthful
79
even when the truth hurts, supportive of their families, kind and
respectful to all they meet, spiritually mature, forgiving, accountable
in their actions, gracious and loving? That sounds like an impossibly
long list of qualifications. The goal is not perfection in each of these
areas, just an honest evaluation that will help you know where they
need oversight in order to keep them out of situations where they are
doomed to fail.
Get to know them – their story, their strengths and weaknesses,

likes and dislikes, their skills and interests, how they communicate,
and their pet peeves, not in one marathon interview, but over time as
your relationship with each of them develops.
Jesus shared life on the road with His disciples – walking,

eating, and sleeping among them, all the while taking advantage of
every teachable moment to challenge them to grow and develop
as individuals, whether it was on the shores of the Sea of Galilee,
a well in Samaria, or the temple court in Jerusalem. His classroom
spanned the country. He also modeled how they could deepen
their relationship with their Heavenly Father through prayer and
knowledge of God’s written Word.
Prayerfully look for people whose personalities, strengths,

weaknesses, and skills are different than your own. That will require
intentionality. We are so tempted to choose those who talk, think and
act like we do, people who enjoy the same activities, have the same
tastes and cultural background as our own. But we are building an
organization, a “body,” and that requires diversity (Ephesians 4:16).
You may not have the opportunity of building your team from
nothing. You may have inherited a team that someone else put
together, but the starting-point is the same, one-on-one relationships.
Luke 6:12-16 tells us Jesus spent the night in prayer before

choosing the twelve who would accompany Him. No doubt He
had been observing them among the multitudes who listened, but
He needed God’s wisdom and purpose in the final selection. Don’t
minimize the importance of this decision. These will be the people
80
with whom you will share your leadership NOTES

journey. Some of those whom God chooses
may surprise you. I wonder if Jesus was
surprised by God’s choice of Judas, and if so,
how much faith did it then take for Him to then
hand Judas control of the purse?
2. UNITING THE TEAM

Once the “building blocks” of your team are
in place, the real work of building a cohesive
body with a common purpose begins. That
will first require that you, as leader, be able
to clearly articulate the vision God has given
you. Communicating that vision in a way that
everyone has the same picture is both essential
and challenging. You do not want your
team members to be like the blind men who
individually described the elephant as a pillar,
a rope, a tree branch, a fan, a wall, and a pipe,
depending on their perspective. The simpler
the terms in which the vision can be expressed,
the more likely your team members are to have
a common understanding, and the greater the
likelihood of uniting them in accomplishing
that purpose. Simplifying the vision is typically
no small task and should not be taken lightly.
After communicating your vision to them, ask
your team members what they think it means to
them. Don’t assume they understand.
The second step is to define how you
as a team will accomplish the vision. Unless
God has already revealed His plan to you,
brainstorming the methodology can be an
excellent team exercise that builds unity, clarity,
enthusiasm and commitment. Let me give you
an example. Your vision may be “a community
of women who love, encourage, and support
one another in their walk with God,” and
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the “how to” part might be “through study of God’s Word, prayer
partnerships, corporate worship, and serving one another.”
3. SERVING ONE ANOTHER

We are never more like Jesus than when we are working together
as one body, in unity of purpose, loving and encouraging one another
(John 17:21). I have personally found that promoting competition
among team members may yield short-term results, but in the end will
foster jealousy, pride, distrust, and suspicion between team members,
distracting them from the common vision of the organization.
Instead, encourage team members to support and encourage one
another, help those who are struggling, promote love, unity and
shared learning. If you have multiple small groups for example,
and one group is thriving while another is dwindling, encourage
the team leader of the “thriving” group to meet one on one with the
“dwindling” leader and share ideas. Another ideas would be to have
regular team meetings where team leaders share their successes
and failures and brainstorm solutions to current issues they face.
Rather than competing with one another, encourage them to set
goals for themselves and their group, but those goals should be ones
that align with your organization as a whole.
Model respect and love for one another in actions, words, and
thoughts. Jesus always had time for the individual, especially
those who were grieving, sick, or emotionally wounded. He had an
impossibly large mission to accomplish in three years of ministry, but
He was never rushed or harried. His secret was daily, consistent,
faithful, and faith-filled obedience to His Father (John 5:19).
4. MAINTAINING A “HEALTHY” ORGANIZATION

a. Encourage individual learning and growth
One of the most important things you as a leader can
do is encourage the individual growth and development of
your team members. Helping them discover God’s calling
on their life will require sharing your life with them, and that,
in turn, involves vulnerability, honesty, and humility on your
part. Faithfully pray for them. Listen carefully to their hopes
and dreams, and do everything in your power to help them
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become all that God has called them to be.

If they are trustworthy and responsible, entrust them with
tasks that stretch their potential. Jesus sent out seventy-two
disciples to the towns where he was going, with very specific
instructions about what to take, what to say and what to do.
Were they fully equipped to go out on their own, healing
the sick and preaching the gospel? They certainly were
not spiritual giants, as events later revealed, but with God’s
empowerment, they accomplished what He sent them to do
and even they were surprised at the results (Luke 10:1 – 20)!
There is a temptation to want to keep them “under your
wing” once you have trained them and they have become an
integral part of your team. Resist that urge! Release them to
do the work God has called and equipped them to do, and
trust God to raise up others to fill the gap. Without that “flow,”
your team will become like rebellious teenagers, equipped
and ready with no place to go.
b. Maximize the value of team meetings.
Team meetings should be purposeful, loving, and learning
opportunities for all. Prior to the meeting, establish an agenda
of the topics to be covered. Start and end each meeting with
prayer. Schedule important information near the beginning
of the meeting so there is adequate time for discussion and
answering questions. Try to estimate the amount of time each
topic will require in order to set an expectation of the length of
the meeting if that is important to attendees. If team member
reports are part of the agenda, suggest how long each report
should take, and give guidelines about expected content.
Perhaps cover highlights only in the meeting with more
detailed reports submitted in writing.
Team meeting time is valuable. Use it wisely for inspiration,
changes in direction or emphasis, and communicating
important information to all. Words of correction for individuals
should always be handled privately. Team meetings can
also be valuable for you as a leader to discern potential
interpersonal relationship problems between team members.
Watch for cliques that exclude some team members
and do activities that encourage team members to develop
83
relationships with those who have different roles than their

own.
c. Spend time together.
Enjoy being with one another – sharing life as time permits.
Ask God for creative ways to do that – sharing household
tasks, going out for dinner or coffee together. These are the
moments when relationships are forged. Fellowship with one
another is an important aspect of building a team, not wasted
time just because no task is completed. Learn to laugh and
cry together as you listen to one another’s stories.
c. Stay alert.
Watch for the “little foxes that spoil the vineyard,” those
minor interpersonal irritations that fester and grow large with
time (Song of Solomon 2:15). Handle them first with prayer
and wisdom. The timing for addressing them is critical, as is
the approach. “Like a gold ring or an ornament of gold is a
wise reprover to a listening ear” (Proverbs 25:12). Whether
your words will offend or become an ornament of gold will
frequently depend on timing. Proverbs is full of wonderful
gems of relational wisdom. Take time to meditate on one or
two daily and you will build a deep reservoir from which to
draw insight.
5. AVOIDING BURNOUT
One of the biggest pitfalls of ministry is emotional and spiritual
burnout. The needs can be overwhelming and the demands of
people all-consuming. If you are not careful you can begin to feel
like the weight of the world is on your shoulders and if you stop to
catch your breath, it will all come tumbling down around you. That
is a lie of the enemy and pride. The work is God’s and the people
are His, not yours. Examine the life of Jesus. There were times
when He withdrew by Himself, times when He withdrew with His
disciples, and times when the crowds begged for His attention
and He walked away. If anyone felt the pressures of time, it must
have been Jesus, who had three years to train and equip twelve
men to change the world. Yet He took time to prepare, to rest,
to pray, to reflect, and to develop one-on-one relationships. God
had no back-up plan.
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MEMORIZE:
John 13:35 - By this all people will know that you are my
disciples, if you have love for one another.
Philippians 2:2–4 - 2 complete my joy by being of the same
mind, having the same love, being in full accord and of one
mind. 3 Do nothing from selfish ambition or conceit, but in
humility count others more significant than yourselves. 4 Let
each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the
interests of others.
KEY TRUTH:
Building a team, a “body,” of diverse people united in purpose and
love for one another is the essence of true leadership.
YOUR RESPONSE:
1. If you could pick a “dream team,” to accomplish your vision, who
would you choose and why?
2. What are the major challenges that you see in a team of which you
are currently a part? What are the team weaknesses and strengths?
You may think these are difficult questions, but they are essential
questions for leaders to answer.
FOR FURTHER STUDY:

Good to Great by Jim Collins (Collins, 2001)
The Five Dysfunctions of a Team by Patrick Lencioni (Lencioni, 2002)
The Fifth Discipline by Peter Senge (Senge, 2006)
85
LESSON 11: CALLED TO FOLLOW
“Follow Me.” On the rocky shores of the Sea of Galilee, Jesus

first spoke these words to two fishermen mending their nets; their
immediate response was to drop their nets and follow Him. He is still
speaking these words to His disciples today. “Fear not, for I have
redeemed you; I have called you by name, you are mine” (Isaiah 43:1).
This is your primary lifetime calling, an intimate walk with the Creator
of the Universe who cares about you and the circumstances of your
life, listens to your heart, numbers the hairs on your head, and daily
offers comfort, wisdom, and encouragement (Luke 12:7).
But He also issues to each of us a secondary, more specific

calling for a Kingdom purpose, a calling customized for our individual
gifts, personality, and circumstances. For some the calling is so
strong and the task so large, it will require a lifetime to complete.
William Wilberforce who tackled the legislative issue of slavery in
England had such a lifetime calling, as did the Apostle Paul.
My experience has been that for most women this secondary

86
calling varies in different seasons of our lives. For me personally,

the seasons of life have been distinct: student, young wife, mom,
corporate career, ministry, and retirement. In each season, I was
called to follow Jesus, but the places to which He led me, and the
activities He equipped me to engage in were very different. What I
had to learn was that each day, in each season, my primary focus was
to “take up my cross and follow Him” (Mark 8:34).
I would not pretend to say that I have lived my life always clearly
hearing His call and walking in His footsteps. In the early years I was
a people-pleaser, thinking if I pleased people, I must be pleasing
Him. But that became difficult when pleasing one person meant
displeasing another! When I finally discovered that I only needed to
live my life before an Audience of One, the knots and complexities of
life unraveled and life once more became simple daily obedience to
the One who called me to follow.
1. WHAT IS CALLING?
Many talk about people having a particular calling or “vocation”
(from the Latin word “to call”), but will not admit that if there is a
“calling,” there must be a “Caller.” We as Christians are unique in
that belief. In “The Call,” Os Guinness defines calling as “the truth
that God calls us to himself so decisively that everything we are,
everything we do, and everything we have is invested with a special
devotion and dynamism lived out as a response to his summons and
service” (Guinness, 2003, p. 4). That means whether I am designing
computer software at work, comforting a sick child at home,
counseling a distraught woman at church, or going out to dinner
with my husband, I am doing it for the One who has called me. “And
whatever you do, in word or deed, do everything in the name of the
Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him” (Colossians
3:17). If I am too embarrassed to take Him with me, I’m not going. If I
say something I should not have said, I know He has heard me, and
I need to immediately ask forgiveness. He has said He will never
leave me, so I know He sees and knows all I say, do, and think.
Many people are under the impression that a call to ministry is a

“higher” calling than one received by a person going into business.
87
In my life I have experienced both calls. As a “stay-at-home” mom

with two boys in elementary school, I felt God’s call to return to the
business world. With my husband’s consent, I pursued the idea and
within a month, after being absent from the workforce for ten years,
I was back in the same job at the same company and location I had
left ten years earlier. Within three months the company was no
longer hiring, but God had spoken to my heart at just the right time. I
remained there for eighteen years, and then, with equal clarity, I knew
it was time to go. Through Titus 2:3,4 I knew God was calling me to
minister to women. Within six months my company was sold, and the
office closed shortly thereafter. Meanwhile, I became the Director
of Women’s Ministry at our church. From personal experience I can
assure you that the call to ministry is not louder or more “spiritual” or
more important, than the call to business. The issue is whether we
are listening and obedient to His call.
How do you discover your calling? The simple answer is to
develop a personal relationship with the Caller. After that, it is
patience and obedience. Ask Him to reveal to you who you are, how
and why you are unique. It is a question He loves to answer!
2. IMPEDIMENTS TO FOLLOWING JESUS

For many, the issue is not knowing what He wants you to do, but
doing it! What keeps you from following Jesus when He calls?
a. Some say that what He is asking me to do just doesn’t make
sense; it’s not logical and reasonable. God is a God of order,
but He sees beyond the physical world and what may not
make sense to us now is often the result of our limited vision.
God asked Abraham to leave his home and go to a country
yet to be named (Genesis 12:1). He asked Gideon to send
thousands of soldiers home and fight a battle against a vast
army with only three hundred men (Judges 7:1-25). Jesus
allowed Lazarus to die, only to raise him from the dead three
days later (John 11:1 - 43). God chose a man who persecuted
and killed Christians to lead the evangelistic effort to the
Gentiles (Acts 9:15). He chooses the weak, not the strong to
accomplish His purposes (1 Corinthians 1:27). In the end, it’s a
matter of faith. Do I believe He really is calling me, and that He
“who began a good work in [me] will bring it to completion at
88
the day of Jesus Christ” (Philippians 1:6)? NOTES

b. Some say that what He asks me to do is
too hard. They are right. There is a cost
to discipleship. In easy times it will cost
you the right to choose your own way.
In hard times it will cost you everything,
perhaps even your life, but in the end,
the eternal reward will be worth the
price (Hebrews 11:6).
c. How do I know if what I think is a
message from God is just my own
imagination? One test is that God’s
vision will glorify Him and enhance His
kingdom; your own ideas will more likely
glorify yourself (Hebrews 11).
d. I don’t know how to hear and recognize
God’s voice. Isn’t it just easier to let
circumstances determine what I should
do? In John 10:27 Jesus said, “My sheep
hear my voice.” If you are His sheep,
you will hear His voice. The question is
whether you will be able to distinguish
His voice from all the competing voices
vying for your attention. Just as an
infant learns to recognize the voice
of her mother because her mother’s
voice is familiar, we can learn to
recognize the voice of our Father by
spending time with Him, reading His
Word so we understand His character,
and developing our relationship with
Him. When we hear a voice that is
contradictory to God’s Word, we know it
is not Him.
11
For I know the plans I have for
you, declares the LORD, plans for
welfare and not for evil, to give
you a future and a hope. 12 Then
89
NOTES you will call upon me and come

and pray to me, and I will hear
you. 13 You will seek me and find
me, when you seek me with
all your heart. 14 I will be found
by you, declares the LORD
(Jeremiah 29:11-14).
I believe that God’s call is unmistakable
and cannot be easily ignored. Claim
His promise that you are His sheep
and you will hear His voice.
3. ANSWERING THE CALL

a. Following Jesus is both a lifetime
choice and a daily decision.
Every morning I have to make the
choice to follow Him that day. I
like to thank Him that there is no
challenge that I will face that day
that He has not already equipped
me to handle, and I ask Him to help
me remain aware of His presence
throughout the day. Then I trust
Him to reveal His will as the day
unfolds.
b. Following Jesus’ call and using
the gifts He has given me for His
kingdom purpose is never boring.
The task itself may seem menial
and mindless, but its significance
comes because I am doing it for
Him. “23 Whatever you do, work
heartily, as for the Lord and not for
men, 24 knowing that from the Lord
you will receive the inheritance as
your reward. You are serving the
Lord Christ” (Colossians 3:23–24). I
am reminded of Brother Lawrence
90
who learned to “practice the presence of God” while

washing dishes. Whether the task we are doing is leading
someone to Christ or balancing a checkbook, if it is done
in obedience to Him, both receive His reward. The task is
immaterial.
c. Timing is important in following Jesus. When Jesus calls
us to follow, He may give us instructions He wants us to
obey immediately or He may just be preparing our hearts
for what He will ask us to do in the future. Be careful not
to assume it is something He is asking you to do now,
but wait for His timing and then act (John 7:3-10). Many
times I have wished I was like the children of Israel in the
wilderness following the cloud during the day and the pillar
of fire at night. That sounds so clear-cut and easy, but then
I remind myself that I have the Holy Spirit within who leads
and guides me.
d. Following Jesus does not necessarily mean responding
to the needs and demands of those around us. If we
believe we must respond to every need and demand, we
will find ourselves in constant turmoil, rushing to meet an
ever-growing number of needs. But if we respond to our
calling, we will address the issues to which God has called
us, and trust Him to call others to meet those concerns we
are unable to touch. If we only respond to the need, we
will burn out when people are ungrateful or unresponsive
to what we offer.
e. When Jesus calls us to follow, He may or may not give us a
clear vision of the destination of our journey, but He will tell
us what to do next. Abraham did not know his destination,
but he knew enough to start the journey, while Noah was
given very specific instructions. Why is that? He is God.
“For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your
ways my ways, declares the LORD. For as the heavens are
higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your
ways and my thoughts than your thoughts” (Isaiah 55:8–9).
f. When Jesus calls we should always be grateful for the
privilege of sharing in His work. He could choose to
accomplish His work without us; instead He has made us
91
His partners.
g. Following His call is a lifetime commitment. The situations
and circumstances and even the goals may change with
time, but there is no retirement from our calling. Mother
Teresa was teaching high school in Calcutta when she
contracted tuberculosis and was sent to Darjeeling for rest
and recovery. On her way there on the train, she received
a call to “work with the poor, living among them.” She
described that call as an “order.” It was that order that kept
her focused on the poor of Calcutta for the rest of her life
(www.ewtn.com - The Early Years).
4. THE TEMPTATIONS OF CALLING

a. Conceit: Some who have experienced God’s call convey
the impression that God has chosen them because they
are more spiritual, more holy, or more righteous than
others, but Paul says, “27 God chose what is foolish in the
world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the
world to shame the strong,” and Paul himself chose to be
glad he was weak, “so that the power of Christ may rest
upon me” (1 Corinthians 1:27; 2 Corinthians 12:9). Pride is
a dangerous sin, inviting destruction and the resistance of
God (Proverbs 16:18; 1 Peter 5:5).
b. Envy: When we see someone else happier or more
successful than ourselves, particularly those with similar
gifts and calling does it make us sad? If so, envy is
present. Proverbs 14:30 warns that “envy makes the bones
rot.”
c. Greed: Do you do what you do because you are called
to do it, or because it will make you wealthy? “You cannot
serve God and money” (Matthew 6:24).
MEMORIZE:
Proverbs 3:5–6 - 5 Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and
do not lean on your own understanding. 6 In all your ways
acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.
Psalm 32:8 - I will instruct you and teach you in the way you
should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you.
92
KEY TRUTH:
When Jesus calls us to follow Him, we will not know all the steps of
the journey ahead, but He will show us the next step to take and our
final destination, and that is enough.
YOUR RESPONSE:
1. What is your calling in this season of life?
2. What is God calling you to do today?
FOR FURTHER STUDY:

The Call by Os Guinness (Guinness, 2003)
Sermon Series “Why Am I Here?” by Robert Morris
www.gatewaypeople.com
93
LESSON 12: REFLECTING, CELEBRATING, COMMISSIONING
I. REFLECTING
As you think about the lessons we have covered in this booklet, what
are three things you hope you never forget?
a.
b.
c.
94
II. CELEBRATING
Think about the contributions of others in the group throughout this
course. Meditate on the contributions of each of them throughout
this course, and ask God to give you a word of encouragement for
each of them.
1.
2.
3.
4.
5.
95
III. COMMISSIONING
Our commissioning prayer:
“Father, I thank you that the entrance of Your words gives light. I
thank You that Your Word, … is alive and full of power. … I thank You,
Father, that [You have given me a spirit] of power and of love and of a
calm and well-balanced mind and discipline and self-control. I have
Your power and ability, … for You have qualified me … as a minister
and dispenser of a new covenant [of salvation through Christ].
I forget those things that are behind me and reach forth

unto those things that are before me. I am crucified with Christ;
nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ lives in me. And the life which
I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, Who loved
me and gave Himself for me.
Today I attend to the Word of God. I consent and submit to Your

sayings, Father. Your words shall not depart from my sight; I will keep
them in the midst of my heart. For they are life to me, healing and
health to all my flesh. I keep my heart with all vigilance, … for out of it
flows the springs of life.
Today I will not let mercy and kindness and truth forsake me. I
bind them about my neck: I write them upon the table of my heart. So
therefore I will find favor, good understanding and high esteem in the
sight of God and man.
Today my delight and desire are in the law of the Lord, and on
His law I habitually meditate by day and by night. Therefore I am
like a tree firmly planted by the streams of water, ready to bring
forth my fruit in my season; my leaf also shall not fade or wither, and
everything I do shall prosper.
Now thanks be to God, Who always causes me to triumph in

Christ!
In His name I pray, amen.” (Copeland, 2005, pp. 135, 136)
96
NOTES
97
NOTES
98
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2017-Esther Manual

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RAISING UP

This book is not to be re-sold by anyone other than

Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture quotations are from the

1. My Identity in Christ …………...………………………….......................7

2. Walking in the Spirit………………………………..................….….....15

4. Dealing With My Past………………..………………...................…..28

5. Nurturing My Relationship With God..…………………….......35

6. Servant Leadership …………………………………………................48

8. Communications, Personalities, Relationships ……….….63

9. Leading Where God Has Placed You ……………….......……73

10. Teamwork – The Key to Leadership ……………………......….79

11. Called to Follow ……………………………………..............................86

12. Reflecting, Celebrating, Commissioning ……....................94

You are called to a great purpose!

This resource is being given to you by Global Advance to build

Our prayer is that you will be encouraged and equipped to

Jonathan Shibley, President - Global Advance

These instructions of Jesus to His disciples, his last while He was

I have written these lessons specifically for those who desired

Leadership can be a humbling experience. If you don’t think of

May His wisdom and presence guide all of us, as we seek to

One of the first rules of leadership is to establish who you are

1. I am blessed: “Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus

2. I am chosen: “even as he chose us in him before the foundation

3. I am loved: “In love he predestined us” (Ephesians 1:4b, 5).

height nor depth, nor anything else in NOTES

Some of us may have never known

4. I am adopted: “He predestined us for adoption as sons through

5. I am accepted: “to the praise of the glory of His grace, by which

6. I am redeemed: “In him we have redemption through his blood”

7. I am forgiven: “In him we have … the forgiveness of our

NOTES have the assurance that “If [I] confess

8. I am seated with Him in heavenly places:

9. I am called: “That you may know what is

and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in

2. Which of these truths is most difficult for you to believe? What

3. Which of these truths is easiest for you to accept, and why do

FOR FURTHER STUDY:

THE NEW ME: BODY, SOUL, AND SPIRIT

When I became a Christian, it was my spirit that was made new (2

unchanged as well. If I was not a

SPIRIT good mathematician before I became

I became a Christian, it is likely the emotional after-effects still

In addition to controlling what goes into my mind, I must learn

As a young mom with two preschoolers I struggled in this area.

and circumstances in my life. I could not NOTES

We don’t need to feel condemned when

SUBMITTING MY WILL AND EMOTIONS

NOTES for me” (Galatians 2:20). Every day my will

My emotions too must be conformed to

And therefore the Lord [earnestly] waits [expecting, looking,

FOR FURTHER STUDY:

Throughout my years of ministry, I have listened to the life stories

NOTES This lesson is intended to guide you

You may have ancestors whom you have

This work of God in your life is your

1. Difficulties – particularly painful events, people, or experiences

FAVORITE THING TO DO:

2. Now add a line in a different color or texture to describe the