Interview Xukai

No.
1 Kai Xu – 21 years old Chinese College Student

-Based on your understanding, what is puppy love?
Based on my understanding, puppy love is any affection and relationship building before High School
graduate which are not allowed by both parents and teachers. Puppy love which we called it “early love”
in Chinese which is normally used as a word to describe a kind of misbehavior.
-What do you think of puppy love?
As for me, if you can find the person you really like, thew age doesn’t matter at all. Puppy love is
acceptable for me if it’s a healthy relationship between two people and make both of them feel happy
and loved. It’s mostly depends on the person, and some can even help people to become mature and
develop mentally
-What do you think may cause people in different culture have different view about puppy love?
I think parents attitude toward puppy love plays an important role here. Chinese parents are conserved
and inflexible; parents in western countries may get education different from parents in China – not that
conserved; Based on this, parents’ thoughts and attitude may influence children’s attitude towards their
feeling of affection at a young age. That probably the main cause of the difference attitude toward
puppy love in different cultures.
-Parent, school, friend and social media, which one you think will influence teenagers’ action and
attitude about puppy love more importantly
I think it’s school. We all know at teenager, we are suffered under a period called “rebellious phase”. At
this stage, parents’ advice and thoughts cannot be well understood and accepted by their children.
However, school as a place with much authority with disciplines, will enforce their students to follow
school’s rules, which will definitely change how students behave and some times even change their
thoughts. Sometimes teachers’ in school are more authorized than parents in students’ mind because
school will force you to do something and prohibit you to do something, but it’s hard for parents to do
that to their children
-Do you have puppy love experience? How was that? If yes, do you parents, teachers or friends support
it or not? If no, why?
No I didn’t. What I have taught in middle school and high school is that we should inly focus on study at
that age, so I didn’t build any relationship when I was in middle school and high school because I know if
I do so I will be in trouble and my school performance will go bad which will make both my parents and
teachers mad. Parents and teachers always warned me that building a relationship is not allowed in
middle school and high school and I need pay all my attention to study. But to be honest, the main
reason is still that I only focused on study and don’t want to think about anything else.
-Do you think build a relationship is necessary if you find a person you really like at a very young age?
(12-17)
If I do find a person I really love at a young at, it probably necessary for me to try to get us into a
relationship. It’s human’s nature, when we find someone we love or like, no one’s first reaction is inhibit
this feeling; we all want to love and be loved; that’s human nature, so I would say it necessary if I find
one I really love.
-What’s your opinion about a very popular topic in China these days – parents don’t allow their children
to have a relationship and date with others before the went to college or even in the college, and after
their children graduate from college, parents eager to find a person for them to get married (blind date).
Even though I am not totally agree with parent’s such action, but it’s still understandable for me – I have
a lot of friends have such experience – they don’t have a boy friend and girl friend from they born till
they graduate from college, and after they graduated, their parents find a man/woman for them to each
other and then get married. The core here is that most Chinese parents hold a belief which we called in
Chinese – be matched for marriage. In short, to get married, both the man and the woman need be
matched about their family background, economic background and academic background. A rich man
married a poor woman is not normally supported by parents in China; A women who was has a phD.
degree married a man only has high school diploma is also hard to be accepted. Parents want to find the
significant others for their child which can satisfy their own (the parents). The reason parents don’t
allow their children to build a relationship early or even in college are that parents don’t want such a
relationship do harm to their children’s academic performance; and they don’t want see their children
find a significant others that are not satisfied by them. However, many children they don’t have such
experience of building a love relationship with others, they are accustomed to the life as a single person,
and when their age reach 30, they will heard some bad words from their relatives and the society – you
should get married, you are 30 right now, when you get older, it may even harder. And such thought are
even worse for female – they have a unique word to describe female who didn’t get married in a old age
– left lady.
-Do you think puppy love and a relationship will influence your school academic performance?
I think it can be some influence because you need put split your effort from study to other things, so you
will not pay so much attention to your study. You need time to develop and keep a relationship to be
good. But it also depends, there are also some students help each other in their study when they in a
relationship.

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1 Kai Xu – 21 years old Chinese College Student

-What do you think of puppy love?

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