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 5 candles and queer culture, explained

25
millenial must-have

17 19 am I addicted to
scented candles?

12
candles and grief

6 ways to remove
candle wax
 candles and
queer culture,
explained.
by Sam Manzella

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I
are key fixtures in many religious rituals
or solo spiritual practices: When I strike a “To me, b
somethin
match and light a candle of my choosing,
the scent permeates my surroundings
and helps ground me in that moment. I’m
exercising agency over whatever space I’m
in, literally and energetically. I believe the
navigati
kids these days call it “creating a vibe.”
  Fran Tirado, a queer writer and orga-
nizer based in Los Angeles, can relate. “As
someone who is in the activist space and
in the media space and feels a day-to-day
emotional tax on my psyche, it is hard to
maintain a vibe and to get excited to go
to work every day at my desk,” they tell
Apartment Therapy. Enter fancy can-
I can’t pinpoint when my obsession dles, which Tirado collects and burns to
with fancy candles began, but I do help create a work-living space that feels
remember the exact moment I real- comfortable, relaxing, and aesthetically
ized it was common knowledge. For pleasing. (They’re a Taurus, shocking
my birthday this past May, not one, absolutely no one.)
not two, but three of my friends and   Part of the reason I can collect fancy
family gifted me beautiful, luxuriously candles is their accessibility. Barring
scented candles. My girlfriend selected luxury home-fragrance brands like Dipty-
a particularly personal one emblazoned que, many fancy candles are priced in the
with my birth date. I was touched but $20–$40 range, which feels extravagant,
surprised. “You’re the only queer per- but isn’t prohibitively expensive. It’s
son I know who doesn’t burn candles a “treat yourself” purchase I can afford
24/7,” I told her. with the added bonus of enhancing my
  It was a joke, but as I lay in bed a few home. Tirado agrees: “The really nice
nights later with my new candle flick- ones can feel like a splurge, but I’ve
ering on my bedside table, I couldn’t started to take that into account as a
stop thinking about the truth in what I’d necessary part of [creating a space] I find
said: So many LGBTQ+ people I know enjoyable,” they note.
love fancy candles. We burn them; we   Now that my home is also my workplace
recommend them; we make them. They due to the COVID-19 pandemic, fash-
adorn our walls and workspaces, round ioning it into a beautiful, inspiring space
out our self-care rituals. We’re drawn to
them like, well, moths to a flame.
  To me, burning a candle is a tangible
form of taking up space, something I’ve
had to teach myself how to do as a queer
woman navigating a sexist, heteronor-
mative world. It’s no wonder candles

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burning a candle is a tangible form of taking up space,
ng I’ve had to teach myself how to do as a queer woman
ing a sexist, heteronormative world.”

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 I actually enjoy inhabiting is more natural stops and starts, and adding a
important than ever. My fancy candles little variety. This approach, which he
encourage me to proudly, fully inhabit calls “chaptering,” is fun and playful,
whatever space I’m in. but for Herman—who loves a good pair
  This sense of personal power isn’t of “super f*cking high platform boots”—
something I take for granted. Histori- it also parallels a larger cultural shift in
cally, queer people have been shamed how people are conceptualizing gender,
or ostracized for being out. Relegated gender presentation, and sexuality. He
to the shadows, we congregated away recalls attending high-pressure meet-
from mainstream society in spaces like ings at his previous job and spritzing on
gay bars or concealed our authentic La Tulipe by Byredo, a perfume tradi-
selves entirely. Being able to channel tionally coded as being “feminine,” for
my queer sensibilities into my physical an instant boost of confidence. Mean-
surroundings—and share that with peo- while, the women in his office would
ple who visit my home or see pictures of wear more “masculine” scents (think
my space on social media—is a privi- Tom Ford’s Tuscan Leather) for that
lege, and a form of power. same boost.

“By firmly establishing a sense of space,

I’m reinforcing that I don’t have to hide.”
By firmly establishing a sense of space,   “Everyone was feeling more powerful
I’m reinforcing that I don’t have to hide by olfactorily taking up more space in a
what (or whom) I love, my sage-scented way that is also gender-expansive,” he
Stevie Nicks votive included. remembers. That freedom to explore
  Matthew Herman of the popular can extend to home fragrances, too, as
home-fragrance brand Boy Smells— LGBTQ people decorate their spaces
which he co-founded with his real-life in ways that celebrate and affirm every
partner, David Kien, in 2016—also part of them.
views candles as more than just decor.   Though plenty of queer people still
“I went to art school, so that level of grapple with the pressures of society’s
creativity and how it manifests in ob- ultra-gendered norms, many queer
jects you use every day has always been circles celebrate and affirm fluidity
something I was super interested in,” and self-expression. Whether through
he tells Apartment Therapy. clothes, perfumes, home fragrances, or
  Herman personally enjoys burning something else entirely, this freedom
different candles for shorter durations is dependent on a sense of security,
throughout the day as a way of creating both in oneself and in one’s literal

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surroundings. This is a relatively new LGBTQ+ person out there is predis-
phenomenon, Herman explains: “I posed to hoard shiny, fancy candles,
feel like for a long time, queerness was or that someone’s identity is less-than
about sanctuary from the rest of the for not ticking every box imposed on
world. There is just the right amount us? Of course not. But Tirado thinks
of breathing room [now] for discovery, there is some “sociocultural truth” in
embracing new things, and expressing the stereotype. In fact, doing what we
them back into the world. Queer people want and claiming space in ways that
don’t have to arrive fully armored.” feel true to us, with no regard to ste-
  There’s also the aesthetic appeal of reotypes, is fundamental to debunking
home fragrance, which ties into what them.
Tirado notes is a mainstream stereo-   “I think it’s just a fact that gay people
type that queer people, and particularly and queer people have better taste in
cisgender gay men, have a propensity general,” Tirado adds with a laugh.
for interior design à la “Queer Eye”’s “And that includes candles.”
Bobby Berk. Does this mean every

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6 clever
tricks
for removing

candle
leftover

wax by Angelika Pokovba

 1
microwave
Fill your candle with water and microwave it for a minute and
a half, maximum two. This will cause the wax to melt and rise
above the water. Let the glass and wax cool, then swiftly pop

2
out the remaining wax with a spoon or butter knife. Import-
ant note: Keep an eye on the candle while it’s in the microwave
as some wicks have a metal wick holder that could pose a fire
hazard.

freezer
Probably the easiest and cleanest method on this list, this tip
only works if there is not too much wax left (about an inch and
a half). Wax shrinks when it is frozen, allowing it to separate
from the walls of its container. After leaving your candle in the
freezer overnight, simply flip it upside down and scrape off the
wax with a spoon or butter knife.

3
boiling water
This method works best with wide-mouth candles. Add boiling
water into your candle—leaving an inch of space at the top—and
let it rest. (Oh, and make sure to protect the surface you set
your candle down on because it will be very hot.) You’ll see the
wax rise to the top, similar to the microwave method, but at a
slower pace. Finish by straining the water (being careful not to
pour the wax down the drain as it can clog) and remove the wax
separately.

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4
double boiler
For softer candles like soy and coconut, the microwave might
be too intense, so the double boiler method will likely work
better (think of it like the bain-marie of candles). Place your
candle into a large empty pot or bowl, and pour the hot water

5
into the container around the candle. The wax will start to soft-
en around the edges, making it easy to pop out with a knife.

heat gun
If you have a heat gun in your house, you’re probably already a
DIY pro and don’t need much advice. But in case you weren’t
aware, a heat gun (or alternatively, a hairdryer) is a great way to
melt the remaining wax inside a candle. Just be careful not to
burn the tag and make sure the candle is on a safe, heat-proof

6
surface. When it is liquefied, you can use a paper towel to re-
move the excess wax.

oven
This method is good if you have multiple candles to handle
at once. Begin by preheating your oven to 150 to 200 degrees
Fahrenheit. Place your candle(s) upside down on a sheet of
aluminum foil on a baking pan. The wax should steadily melt
and pool on the foil within 15 minutes. Carefully remove the
pan from the oven, and take the glasses off the pan using an
oven mitt. Once the leftover wax has dried on the baking sheet,
you can remove it from the aluminum foil to use in the future or
throw it out.

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candles
& grief
Lighting a candle is one way to show that you remember some-
one. It is a way to show that you want to honor that person.
Whether you do so at home, in a church, or through a virtual
candle website, the goal is the same. Making this small gesture
can be quite a life changing statement both for you and for the
others you hope to support during your time of loss. Most
people don’t see the value of what seems like such an insig-
nificant gesture. Why do it? What does it really mean to light a
candle after a person’s loss?

It Does Not Have To Be Spiritual

While many religious beliefs center around candle lighting,
the act itself is not necessarily that. In fact, it can be done for
many reasons. Candles, such as one placed on your mantle
after you’ve lost someone, can help you to think about that
loved one. Placed in a church, it can help you and others pray
for that individual. Virtual candles can help you to show sup-
port to loved ones who are suffering this loss along with you.
  The lighting of a virtual candle is a significant step towards
showing respect for the lost loved one. If, for example, you’ve
lost a family member, you may not have a lot of words to say
to the immediate family but you want them to know you are
thinking of them and honoring the lost individual. A virtual
candle helps to do that. When the number of these candles
increases, it can help family to see just how much this person
meant to others.
  Don’t overlook the value of such a gesture. You cannot do
much after someone dies to support your loved ones or to
honor the life that was lost. What you can do, though, is to
show simply that you are there, thinking of them and sending
them good thoughts.

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A“Am I addicted to scented candles?
Perhaps. I’ll try anything to fight the
darkness of 2020.”
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by Mary McNamara
H ere’s how bad it’s gotten: I just
ordered a scented-candle-making kit.
  I know, I know; I am way behind
on a generous curve) a fine seam, because
I am old enough to have had several years’
worth of Home Ec, as well as wood and
metal shop, thrust upon me by the benefi-
cence of the Maryland State Department of
the curve, to which the wickless, fra- Education.
grance-free, picked-over shelves of my lo-   Nor am I attempting to distract my fam-
cal Michaels can attest. (Not much I can do ily with yet another pandemic project. My
with a five-pound bag of soy wax without new hobby is simply a matter of econom-
wicks, is there, Michaels?) So I was forced ics: I will be trying to make my own scent-
to turn once again to Amazon, thereby ed candles because I need to stop spending
draining any potential “pioneer” spirit so much damn money on scented candles
from the enterprise. (It’s hard to think of and I refuse to accomplish this by burning
yourself as “getting back to basics” while fewer of them.
ordering something online.)   Before the pandemic, I had an uneasy
  In this case, however, DIY pride is not a relationship with the turn-of-the century
factor. I actually know how to make can- boom in the home fragrance industry.
dles, and churn butter, and sew (if graded   Certainly it is lovely to walk into a fig-

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 “Scented candles are now
or balsam- or hyacinth-scented room
(apologies to those who are allergic or

a staple; I buy them with

bothered by scent). But all those candles
and diffusers cost money, often quite a bit,
and their growing popularity seemed to be
a tell of the new faux-cozy consumerism, the same regularity I
a mark of a system that encouraged the no-
tion that money was there to burn. In Los buy milk, turkey burgers
Angeles anyway, the fault lines of gentri-
fication always seemed to lead to a coffee and toilet paper.”
bar and a shop selling $40 candles, often
with names like Cashmere. learned how to trim a wick and uses terms
  The furor over Meghan Markle’s pen- like “a good throw” (referring to the ability
chant for Dyptique, revealed during her of a candle to spread scent).
recent remote appearance on “America’s   Whatever prejudice I had against un-
Got Talent,” was solid evidence in support likely formulations and absurd names is
of my long-held belief that scented can- long gone. Home Sweet Home, Sweater
dles were part of the luxury economy, ap- Weather, Autumn Oak and Charred Juni-
propriate for holidays, gift-giving and the per blaze away in every room and, yes, my
side tables of the very rich.So does crisis younger daughter was one of those who
make moral cowards of us all. caused Target to sell out of its Cashmere
  I started burning candles at the begin- Vanilla candle after someone on TikTok
ning of the shutdown in order to make the mentioned that it smelled like the Tom
house seem more festive. March was cold, Ford scent favored by Harry Styles.
if you remember, and often overcast —   “When you come home with one that
even rainy — and my newly re-congregated says ‘Live, Laugh, Love,’” my son said
family needed a lift that did not involve recently, “I am going to have to stage
consuming 2,000 extra calories per day in an intervention.”
baked goods. And it was just for a month   Honestly, if Yankee Candle, Bath &
or two, right? Body Works or Target had any sense of
  Seven months later, scented candles honor, they would name a fragrance after
are now a staple; I buy them with the same me. Although I’m not sure “earthy anxiety
regularity I buy milk, turkey burgers and combined with salty hints of sorrow and
toilet paper. There are used candle jars spicy top notes of fury and fear” would be
stashed in every cupboard like the empty a bestseller.
bottles of a secret drunk and ashtrays not   Especially since the whole point of all
seen in decades are scattered through- these candles is to create an alternate me,
out the house as receptacles for all those one who lives serenely, in a calmer, saner,
burned matches. more hopeful place and time. A time when
  And I’m not the only one. My older how my home smells doesn’t matter so
daughter’s bedroom is awash in apple much because I am not in it 24/7.
cinnamon scent in an attempt to keep   As I informed my smart-mouthed
pace with her Temple University education son, science has proven that smell is the
seasonally as well as academically. She has strongest trigger of memory and emotion

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— the olfactory bulb runs straight from the
nose to the amygdala and hippocampus,
parts of the brain most strongly associated
with emotion and memory. (Hippocampus
Nights — a woodsy fragrance, with a strong
patchouli body and a top of balsam and
eucalyptus.) And frankly, triggering all the
best memories and emotions has become
paramount these days. We need to remem-
ber a time when we weren’t all stuck at
home, our stomachs in permanent churn
over pandemic and election anxieties.
  While stuck at home during the coro-
navirus pandemic, Reem Kassis and her
daughters have spent a lot of time in the
kitchen, making pasta, curries, bibimbap
and cookies. Kassis sees parallels between
their experience and her own childhood,
living beside conflict in Jerusalem.
  So it really isn’t surprising that while
much of the beauty industry is in free-
fall — who needs lip liner when there’s no
place to go? — home fragrance has grown
in leaps and bounds. As Americans shelter
at home, we increasingly seek solace in
light and scent; candle-making has saved
more than a few small businesses.
  Faced with financial struggles early in
the pandemic, Fresno’s Smoke & Fire came
up with a quarantine line of scents includ-
ing Shelter & Chill, Come Thru Queen and
even Our Votes Matter (“infused with Fir,
Cypress, Bayberry, a hint of Vanilla, and
Eucalyptus”) alongside more traditional
varietals including Fireside Chat and, of
course, Cashmere Sweater.
  In our house, the blossoms of spring
gave way to the citrus of summer and now
we are into the mellower aromas of au-
tumn: apple spice, pumpkin spice, amber,
musk, a little vanilla (not too much!), fig
and cedar. The scents emanating from
cheerful little flames not only reassure us
that we don’t have COVID-19 (everyone

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who has never woken feeling a bit crappy holidays and the seasonal shifts will be
and rushed to test their sense of smell, different but they can still be festive,
please stand on their head) but also still be happy.
remind us that there are things, many   It’s a lot to ask of a few tumblers of
important things, that exist implacably scented wax, but then I was raised Cath-
and restoratively beyond the reach of olic and everyone knows about Catholics
current events. and their deep attachment to candles,
  Yes, it may still be 100 degrees at 10 offered up, with prayers, in memory
a.m. here in Southern California, but it of the dead and hope for the living. The
is autumn somewhere. Or will be. The various aromas that scent so many homes
pandemic cannot forbid the changing these days form their own kind of contin-
color of leaf, the emergence of naked uous prayer: that someday soon, we will
tree; it cannot banish those bright sunny not need the therapeutic power of ylang
days that dissolve into gold, then ame- ylang & lavender, apple & clove to soothe
thyst, then starry shivery black. (Climate nerves frazzled by confinement, worry and
change can, however, which is why it is the perpetual aggravation of a news cycle
important to vote by Nov. 3, the wiles of that has done its utmost to make Dorothy
pumpkin spice notwithstanding.) Parker’s phrase “What fresh hell is this?”
  COVID-19 may curtail this year’s expe- mundane and unfunny.
rience of Halloween, Thanksgiving and   After all, it is better to light a single
Christmas but it can’t excise their reality. candle than sit and curse the darkness
As the days grow shorter (and hopefully — and if the darkness fights back, then a
cooler), our experience of the upcoming little pumpkin spice should do the trick.

“There are things, many important

things, that exist implacably and
restoratively beyond the reach of
current events.”

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MILLENIAL
MUST-HAVE

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 do not remember a provides both heat and light. But in
single candle burning 2020 the candle has morphed far from
in my 90s childhood its utilitarian origins; today you can get
home. Candles were tealights, pillar candles, taper candles,
the preserve of pow- votive candles, container candles,
er cuts and Catholic prayer offerings, scented, unscented, beeswax, vegan
their very nature functional or spiri- candles, and let’s not forget the next-
tual only. Today, like millions of other gen candle and Mrs Hinch favourite – a
homes across the country, my mum’s soy wax melt.
home on an autumn evening looks like   The independent butcher and the
a seance, with several candles burning baker may well have benefited from
simultaneously, contributing (in no a neighbourhood spending surge in
small part) to the estimated £1.9bn lockdown, but it is the candle-stick
pounds spent every year in the UK maker who is smashing it in the sales
candle market. department. Local manufacturers
  Candles are sold everywhere from like Yorkshire business, Supplies for
supermarkets to Selfridges with prices Candles, saw so much demand it hired
varying from pocket change to the 35 new employees in 2020. While
financial equivalent of buying a sofa: Selfridges reportedly saw candle sales
Fornasetti and Gucci claim joint first skyrocket 54 per cent in March and
prize for the most expensive candles Net-A-Porter a 130 per cent year-on-
on Matchesfashion.com, ringing in at year increase. Brits buy an average of
£550 and £525 respectively. six candles per year but lockdown set
  And candles have celebrity status. our love ablaze.
Every time the Duchess of Sussex   A good scented candle when lit can,
appears on Zoom, it is front of yet an- however, evoke memories from our
other well-crafted Zoomscape featur- past such as places we’ve visited
ing a Diptyque candle (most recently   Given candle fires result in approx-
Tubéreuse, although Meghan is known imately 350 casualties every year, to
to love the Baies scent so much she our cavemen ancestors it might seem
placed diffusers around St George’s unnecessarily risky to bring scented
Chapel on her wedding day). For those fire into the centre of our electrici-
less worried about what the in-laws ty-supplied homes. Not to mention in
might think, Gwyneth Paltrow’s sell- the middle of a pandemic when one of
out Goop “This Smells Like My Vagina” the key symptoms of Covid-19 is a loss
and subsequent “This Smells Like My of a sense of smell. But Deborah Sugg
Orgasm” offering showed just how Ryan, professor of design history at
committed we are to the cult of candle. the University of Portsmouth, tells The
  At its most basic a candle is an ignit- Independent candles are often about
able wick, embedded in wax or another feelings, not functionality.
flammable solid allowing humans to   “I think for some people candles will
easily create a contained fire, which always be reminders of power cuts, es-

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 pecially if they lived through the 1970s
blackouts,” she says. “[But] the scented variety of scents. The American brand
candle in a pretty glass jar couldn’t be has over 200, ranging from “angel’s
further from this as it evokes luxury and wings” to “mango peach salsa”. Then
pleasure. A good scented candle when came the era of higher-end scented can-
lit can, however, evoke memories from dles from Diptyque, Jo Malone, ByRedo
our past such as places we’ve visited. and the White Company. Even the Duch-
  “Perhaps we need this more than ever
ess of Cambridge is apparently a fan of
when we’re locked down in our homes an orange blossom Jo Malone candle.
and unable to travel. We don’t just miss   But it isn’t just about scents – in fact
the sights and sounds of places; we also many bestsellers are scentless. Can-
miss the smells.” Indeed some brands dles have evolved to be a central part of
have capitalised on this lockdown homeware with aestheticism as a pri-
absence – Earl of East has designed mary purpose. Although many of the
candles with on-the-nose monikers above brands remain popular, of the 12.4
like “sense of normality”, “the cinema”, million Instagram posts with the hashtag
and “the local”. #candle, users now focus on candles with
  Undoubtedly scent has long been the
striking visual elements: shapes, struc-
selling point of candles. Take Yankee tures, decorative notes. In a world where
Candles, once considered the candle interior trends are there to be photo-
du-jour largely because of their huge graphed and shared, candles are no
longer just to be experienced firsthand.
  Bianca White, 29, a primary school
teacher from London, started a paint-
ed candle business in June. White was
inspired after seeing a floristry on a
lockdown walk and deciding she wanted
a career change. Her business, Bable,
which she runs from her kitchen table,
has completely taken off. “Gosh I have
made hundreds,” she tells The Indepen-
dent. “I’m currently frantically trying to
get through my first big wholesale order
for a shop. Demand is off the charts!”
  White says despite only running her
business for a matter of weeks she has
noticed her customers enjoy the small
details of her candles and how they
fit into their homes. “I have definite-
ly noticed that people take joy in table
laying and making their homes fun with
candles,” she says. White has been so
successful she has handed her notice in
at school.

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 “Candles have evolved to fit tablescapes
and mantle pieces as decorative objects, to
be enjoyed second hand on social media,
as cult objects and as experiences.”
  Matilda Goad, British designer azine’s purchases of the season in Au-
and creative consultant, agrees gust was the Kana x Evermore candles
visuals are central to the modern poured into large ceramic gingham
candle, saying she was inspired to bowls, meant to have a second life once
start making candles because she the candle is long burnt out.
“found it really hard” to find can-   Matches are also having a renais-
dles that “looked just as good when sance moment - a shell painted match-
they sat unlit in a candle holder as box collaboration between blogger
they did when they glimmer away at Alex Stedman and designer Frances
night” – a testament to the impor- Costelloe, priced at £9, was an online
tance of appearance. sell-out. In an Instagram post, Sted-
  This can be seen in the success man encouraged customers to frame
of candles like the Lex Pott twisted the box, illustrated by Costelloe, long
candle. Made in Pott’s Rotterdam after the emerald-green tipped match-
studio, they combine the candle es were finished.
and base as one, creating a unique   In 2020 candles are no longer about
design but one that is slightly fire and heat, or even just scent. They
structurally compromised from the have evolved to fit tablescapes and
moment you light it. Others like the mantle pieces as decorative objects, to
HAY twisted candle (which TikTok- be enjoyed second hand on social me-
ers have tried to recreate to varying dia, as cult objects and as experiences.
levels of success) and the Studio You can even get candle subscription
Billie “Bella & Yates” origami-style boxes delivered to your door or go to
pleated candles fall into a similar candle workshops to make your own.
scentless but sophisticated bracket.   If millennials are supposedly re-
  While brands, like Bella Freud, sponsible for the demise of everything
make their candle holders so desir- from TGI Fridays, to department stores
able that even once the candle itself and cereals, at least this is one industry
is gone, customers want to retain that they can take credit for making
the empty shell. One of Vogue mag- more profitable than ever.

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WICK magazine was designed in Detroit,
Michigan by Xueyun Cecilia Findlay. This
magazine uses multiple fonts including
Didot, Filosofia, and EloquentJFPro.
WICK was made in the spring of 2021.

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