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Conversations Among Cats

Overheard by Gabriel Rosenstock

Page 1
Cover Photo: Jakub Halun
20171106 Cats Chiang Mai 0178 DxO - Category:Paintings of cats -
Wikimedia Commons

Book 1, Conversation with Cats, available here:

https://freekidsbooks.org/conversations-among-cats/

Text: CC-BY-NC
Images: Public Domain

Page 2
Sophie Sperlich
https://mdl.artvee.com/sftb/702808an.jpg

‘Hey, look! I’ve just caught a mouse! A big white

mouse!’
‘Oh no, you haven’t!’
‘Oh yes, I have!’
‘Oh no, you haven’t!’
‘Oh yes, I . . . I haven’t?’
‘No! I’m not a mouse!’
‘You’re not a mouse?’
‘No! I’m a kitten.’
‘A kitten? I don’t believe it. Say MEEOW!’
‘MEEOW!’
‘Again, please?’
‘MEEOW!’
‘Oh . . . you are a kitten. Sorry about that!’

Page 3
cat-in-the-moonlight.jpg (640×438) (wikiart.org)
Théophile Steinlen.

I feel ashamed! Imagine not knowing the difference

between a kitten and a mouse. What’s wrong with me? I
don’t know. I really don’t know. Maybe I don’t think hard
enough.

Or maybe I just think too much. Is that it? Yes, that’s

it . . . maybe. Well, I can’t just sit here thinking about it all
night, can I?

I mean, a kitten and a mouse – they don’t even smell

the same!

Page 4
Adolf von Becker
https://mdl.artvee.com/sftb/700671an.jpg

My name is Susy and . . . oh, I think I’m falling asleep.

Could we have this conversation some other time, please?

Yes, I’m definitely falling asleep. I hope I don’t start

dreaming about that rat again.

Rats! I can’t stand them . . .

Page 5
Arthur Heyer
https://mdl.artvee.com/sftb/701107an.jpg

Page 6
 Hello, good meeowning to you! May I introduce you to
Lola, my pet ladybird. She’s something else, isn’t she? All
the other cats are so jealous.

I have to be very gentle with Lola. She’s rather

delicate.

By the way, do you know what you are supposed to

say when you catch a ladybird?

Fly away east

Fly away west
And show me the cat
That I love best!

My grandfather told me that one.

Page 7
Arthur Heyer
https://mdl.artvee.com/sftb/701110an.jpg

Page 8
 Tell me. Honestly! What do you think of dogs? Do
you think they are . . . what shall I say, necessary?
Really, really necessary? I don’t know. I doubt it.

I’m going to make a list of things that are really,

really necessary. Dogs won’t be on that list, I’m afraid.

Dogs! They think they’re awfully clever. Don’t

they? They can’t even say ‘Meow!’

Page 9
Arthur Heyer
https://mdl.artvee.com/sftb/701104an.jpg

Page 10
 OK, you want to know what’s really
necessary? Meow! Butterflies!

Can you imagine what the world would be

like without butterflies? Seriously! What kind of
a world would that be?

When I was small, I thought butterflies were

made out of butter. On hot days, I wondered
why they didn’t melt! Meow!

Page 11
Faith Goble
Cat's Meow (painting) Cat (poem after Carl Sandburg's 'Fog') | Openverse

Page 12
 My name is . . . actually, I’m not allowed to
say. Seriously! It’s all very hush-hush. You
know, classified!
Some people know me as Question Mark, or
QM for short. My tail is supposed to look like a
question mark. Meow!
I’m from a place called Oweynagat. If you
were from the West of Ireland, you would know
that Oweynagat is code language. The place was
originally known in Irish as Uaimh na gCat, or
the Cave of the Cats.
Now, what can I say about Oweynagat? I
could say a lot but, as it happens, I can’t say
very much, I’m afraid. You see, it’s all hush-
hush, top secret. I’d love to tell you more,
but . . .
Oweynagat is in Co. Roscommon, Ireland,
near a place called Tulsk. Oweynagat is like an
Irish, hidden-away Langley (home of the George
Bush Center of Intelligence, USA) – except
Oweynagat is older. Much, much older.
Prehistoric, in fact.
OK, I’ve said enough, maybe too much!
You won’t hear from me again. A cat may have
nine lives, but I’m not taking any chances. This
is QM, signing out.

Page 13
Arthur Heyer
https://mdl.artvee.com/sftb/701112an.jpg

Page 14
 There’s something about butterflies. I don’t know what
it is. If you see a yellow butterfly, the days ahead are
going to be bright and sunny, believe it or not!

I heard that from my granny! She never told a lie in

her life!

Never . . . Meow!

Page 15
Jules Le Roy
https://mdl.artvee.com/ft/707067an.jpg

Page 16
 ‘OK, kitties, its quiz time!’
‘Hurray! Meow!’
‘What do you call a big building to honour cats?’
‘Dunno!’
‘A cathedral!’
‘Oh! Meow!’

‘If a dog bites your tail, what word is used to describe

such an incident?’
‘Dunno!’
‘A catastrophe!’
‘Oh! Meow!’

‘Where is the best place to go on a holiday, if you are

a cat?’
‘Dunno!’
‘Catalonia!’
‘Oh! Meow!’

‘What is the German word for the river Danube?’

‘Dunno!’
‘Very close. I’ll give you that one. It’s Donau!’
‘Oh! Meow! Meow! Meow!’

‘That’s all for today. More tomorrow. What day is

tomorrow?’
‘Dunno!’

Page 17
Henriëtte Ronner-Knip
https://mdl.artvee.com/sftb/702512an.jpg

Page 18
‘Hello? What have we got here?
Now, kitties . . . Listen! Pay close attention!

Shh . . . ‘

‘Meow!’
‘Shhh!’

‘Do this right and we’ll have a tale to tell!

‘Meow!’

Page 19
Charles Van Den Eycken
https://mdl.artvee.com/sftb/702292an.jpg

Page 20
‘What time is it?’
‘What? What time is it?’
‘Yes, what time is it, please? Meow!’
‘It is precisely . . . I don’t know. Why do you want
to know?’
‘I might be late. Or early. Meow!’
‘Cats are never late. Or early. Cats are always on
time.’
‘Really?’
‘Always. Meow!’
‘I was wondering. What exactly is ‘time’ anyway?’
‘Time? . . . What is time?’
‘Yes.’
‘Well, it’s a bit like parsley, you know?’
‘Parsley? Meow!’
‘Or sage.’
‘Sage? What are you talking about?’
‘Time! I’m talking about time.’
‘What is time?’
‘You could say it’s a bit like rosemary.’
‘First it was like parsley, then sage – and now it’s
like . . . Meow! Rosemary?’
‘Have you never heard the song:

'Are you goin' to Scarborough Fair?

Parsley, sage, rosemary, and time,
Remember me to one who lives there
She once was a true love of mine!’

Page 21
Clyde A. Copson
https://mdl.artvee.com/ft/907357il.jpg

I know. You think it’s boring. I thought the same,

at first. But believe me, do this for 20 minutes
every day and you won’t know yourself!

Page 22
https://mdl.artvee.com/ft/905261il.jpg
Frank Arthur Nankivell

TERRORIST
Known as “Jock the Shock”

Wanted by the CIA

(Cat Intelligence Agency, Oweynagat,
Ireland)

Huge Reward!
Page 23
Sophie Sperlich
https://mdl.artvee.com/ft/701507an.jpg

Page 24
 ‘Hi there, I’m Peaky!’
‘And I’m Squeaky, the one with the ribbon.
We’ve just learned a lovely new song!’
‘Actually, it’s not new. It’s quite old,
Squeaky!’
‘Is it? Meow! Anyway, it’s called . . .’
‘Farborough Scare!’
‘No, Peaky! Meow! It’s Scarborough Fair.’
‘Oh yes, thanks, Squeaky. Scarborough Fair!
Of course . . .’
‘What a song, Peaky! What a song!’
‘Indeed, Squeaky! Meow! What a song,
indeed!’
‘Scarborough! It sounds like a really nice
place, doesn’t it, Peaky?
‘Nice, Squeaky? You bet! Terrific! Meow!’
‘They have parsley there, and sage, and
rosemary and . . . Meow! They might even have
some catnip there as well, Peaky!
‘Catnip? Do you think so, Squeaky?
‘Yeah, catnip, Peaky! Meow! So, friends,
we’re off to Scarborough! Wanna come along?
Meow!’

END

Page 25
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