Man of meekness His name is Moses

An Israelite, a levite raised in Egypt

His Staff is famous across generations
The parting seas and burning bushes
Truth was told in years of old
From Jacob, Joseph, Judah, till promises unfold
Freedom is brought through the graces of the Lord
Four hundred years their ceaseless tears
For the whipping and beating of godless ruling
Folded inside the basket an infant God's obedient servant
Made mighty and brave, bold to what he believes
Mad for the slavery, his anger he could not bear
Far had he gone to escape from what he had done
Made by fate, out from Egypt his family he shepherded
Hundred thousands from twelve tribes
He led back to God's promised land to Abraham

April 8, 2023
Lord, I am always distracted with the things I wanted. Please help me.
I spent so many hours thinking about my plans and dreams. Thinking
about the things I wanted for myself, instead of the things and plans
you have in store for me. Lord, I am so preoccupied of having a grand
life in the future without realizing that this might be not Your plans
for me. I always kept in my journal the long list of skills and materials
I wanted, yet I never even consult these to You, if this is still according
to Your will. I stil don’t rely on You completely. I still don’t lay down
my everything to You. Because if I did, I shouldn’t have looked for
worldly ways to feel good and productive today. I shouldn’t have felt
anxious about next week. There seems to be no rest on me. To where
all of these leading. Have I truly made my life as an altar? Because,
truly I felt like not setting my eyes to where I am going. Lord, please
help me to rely completely on You. Please give me strenght to
surremder everything to You. Please give me patient for Your ultimate
promises and plans for my life. Make me blind to the worldly beauty
that is so temporary. Give me eyes that only see the best in
everything. Give me eyes that is only able to see Your heavenly
kingdom. Lord, make me blind for material things. Help me not to
want all that is temporary. Help me to stay in the place where you are
placing me. Help me to be still before You. Bring me a heart that is
fully peaceful, joyful and contented.

The Rescue

In the land of greed, God saw and heard

In the promised land whilst Abraham herded
People in madness in Lot’s place nested
With God’s promises, Abraham’s praises, and prayers
A rescue for Lot’s family descended
Angels in men’s faces to Sodom visit
Daughters and wife of Lot were to be saved
Tears filled their eyes whilst they leave
Unfit Lot’s wife in one thought turned into salt
Dirt whispers to her head—hurling her from heaven to death
Sodom in guilt and filth, a fire was spit
Sodom in the morning became a ruin of sin
Sodom met doom for their long looming moan

To remind us that when Jesus Christ rescued us there is no turning

back.

A family glad he’s been claimed to be

On the day when

When she was eight A
All she wanted was a loyal playmate A
Too much did she want to have friends B
Though was unwanted in games B
Living was already ugly those days C
Unfair in many ways C
Unstoppable, the child grows amid cruel realities D
Loving and nurturing her C
Crying and caring for small things D
Every day spent in growing and learning
In High School she found glitters
In the midst of responsibilities in her studies
But one day a mist
Buried her deep in the forest away from life
Desperate she cried for help
Impatient, she stepped away from light
Never stay to fight
Brimming with anger
Many suffered saving her
In the fading of her silverdust
She is drowning in the lake of distrust
Silver-dusts were all but spent in the wind
Even years she could not again find
To no one she could ever admit her pain
She was angry to things she was innocent
She was silly to others as she imagined
When years gone by
She somehow resolves some of her many why
College is no the same
Faces are all mixed, so different
Then she thinks, finally a time for fixing
What she did is to fit in
Though eyes of the past still holding her back
Though freedom still seems so abrupt
Yet her desperation reaches the sky
She thirsts for life even heaven could not deny
(Because I am home.)

In my lonely days, I remember myself taking a full rest under the

trees.

I woke up with smudge of tears in my face and drop that lingers in my

eyes. I bowed my knees, and I raised my hands. My prayers were
graces and mercies for my worries. For long minutes, I placed all my
groans and tears on my blanket and bed-sheet. Silence during the
dawn was overwhelming. But another thing if the roosters crow, and
chickens rap, goats and pigs as well stir up. Then, whilst the dawn
was hiding me, I would trudge on my way to the refuge of my sullen
day—to the Kawayan trees twenty steps away.

Since That Day

In the glimpse of moments

I was but a child with so many dreams
Of all dreams, the most I wanted
Is to be beauty and brain
In my childhood mind
I wonder if I can play sports of different kind
Or wear shorts and dresses in fine line
I wonder if I would look good
On the pants and sneakers whilst in the road
I wonder if I could be as white
Or could be as neat
As the other kids in the school
I remember I was not after all
So much did I want to have many friends before
I wanted people who care for me not as a vapor
Thanks that a few did love me
I would try to know till the end of the day
Since after many years, now that I am twenty
Still I am battling against insecurity and vanity
For a child knows when she is ugly
For a child knows ugly from beauty
For even a child is not innocent to insecurity
For even a child has a dream of beauty
For the reality of these long days
Is never-ending agony and misery
Nobody dreams of insecurity
Nobody can just say that this is absurdity
For it happens since that day till today
And One only knows, the end of this ugly story
April 4, 2023

In Ocean Deep

Oh, when shall I be freed from deep hypocrisy

When I claimed to be loved wholly by the Man so Holy
Lord, I am drowning deep in the sea of insecurity
Lord, I long to breathe free in the surface of purity
My days have been far reach by the sun
Here I am facing the fading sea with the light gone
Without strength to cling on fully the life of Your love
Though still I open my eyes in the surface above
Oh God, can You let me behold You
Be my eyes so I can see in your point of view
Perhaps it is best to think of You this way
To be always with me and never once away
But if I say so to whom did I lie
Yes, I know you can read me inside
You can hear from miles the chains of my pride
Or the memories I reminisce when I died
I have gone away from your Guide
You can see the deepest of my soul
The every cave where I hid desires so foul
You can distinguish the sound of my voice
May it be disgust, insincerity, in purity I disguised

Wonders

I am wondering if Your clothes are the clouds

I am wondering if the trees are your brows
I am wondering if your tears are this ocean
I am wondering if You shone brighter than the sun

Lord, should I continue telling my story through poetry?

Or is it preferable for me to use language bluntly.
Are you not the reason why I rhyme boldly?
Did you not write a perfect romance, our love story
If to recount since day one You courted me
You send your promises through roses and lilies
You sing for me each day through the mockingbirds
You dance for me through the ocean waves
You hold me tightly in the darkness
You stayed with me in the wilderness
As I read the first word of Your bound love letters
All I remember is One voice in different degrees
You love me the same since the dawn of decades
You love me the same in my messy moments
You love me the same as a nobody
And made me into someone worthy
Lord, it is You who clothed me
Yet, it is not You who I thought did love me
Or at least now, my first love became my dark story
And my true love freed me from misery

April 3, 2023
Gold

All the wispy smoke lingers since the dawn

I could not help but be nostalgic to what I found
To the golden flowers dancing, I am not alone
I could not help but get drawn
I wear all of these accessories
The smile, nostalgia and noises
Truly, this day strums in exuberance
Though far from tunes of cohesive devices
Though I barely distinguish voices from faces
Though I stood aloof in all of these
Though dry shades gilded me
Everything still seems fun and free
Skirts being raised up
Crop tops overly cropped
Drums in bomb sports
Lyres in metallic riots
Truly, for a seemingly bored life
I see a golden cake to be halved with a knife.
The bangs of drums get louder than my heartbeats
An anonymous conflict for all my senses
I see the golden moments of my students
I smell their sweet smiles on the dishes
I touch the keyboard with beating
I hear my high school’s joyful songs playing
I feel my head aching
With the memories bravely surging
My long years are behind my back
Before me is the Golden Path
I am alone yet I wanted to laugh
Of course not, a poem is enough
Just that I am standing here in a banner of Gold
A celebration for my growing up and growing old

April 2, 2023-Sunday

When Flames of Arrow Scorch our Faith

When Flames of Arrow Scorch our Faith

We call for rescue through Your Trumpet
When the enemy arose from the field
You alone our Sword and Shield

When the spears of doubt pierce our hearts

You bind our wounds with Your Staff
When we sail to share and ocean rage
You command it down not to surge

When storm and rain shake our faith

You sheltered us under your Feet
When our lamps are stricken by the wind
Your light to us You lend

When our tears drown us beneath

You breathe to us Your gift of grace
When lions seem to prey us at night
In the darkness You help us win the fight

When the world opens the floodgates of our old selves

You let the Cross shut the gates
When the world fed us with polluted wind
You sustain us with your precious grain

When accusing words snare us into condemnation

You remind us of our ultimate mission
When tomorrow got us yoke in worries
You remind us with our dark stories
When we tremble to be Your witnesses
You remind us your incomparable graces and mercies
When serpent crawls around our neck
Your hands grip it to death

When we walk and You are with us

No one shall withstand to be against us
When Flames of Arrow Scorch our Faith
We call for rescue through Your Trumpet

When we stumble for lack of faith

You hold us tight to walk with Your Spirit
For who gathers the wind through His fist
And purify the rivers through His garment

For who is the Creator and Destroyer

If not the Sustainer and Redeemer
For who can be against us
If our God walks with us

March 29, 2023

A Prayer
For a weary soldier
Facing giants in the field
Wresting against chaos in the cage

Oh, God,
In my bed, I cried
With a blanket, my tears dried.
In my heart,
You know I tried.
Even to myself, I lied.
I tried to see You outside.
I tried to see among the clouds in the sky.
I tried to see you in me, in a mirror when I smile.
I tried to see you among the stars.
Even among the million graces in Your altar.
I tried.
You see me cried.

But the beauty of this prayer is the glory and mercy of God within.
Though our weaknesses fail us, our weariness drown us, in our hearts
God never fails.

Under the fig tree,

in my lowest moment You comfort me.
Oh God, I give You all my broken pieces.
All my tears
shed through Your promises.
Just as chaos raises from the ashes,
peace rushes as the sun rises.
Through your voice in the waters,
Chaos vanishes.
Amen.

Monday

Lord, one of the great things I learn last week in my battle against sin
is to always do things by faith. In my small secret sins, I let my flesh
to control me. Without knowing that I put on my old self. I fed the
worldly dog. Lord, my spirit is grieving for these choices I’ve made.
There are some moments that I felt like I am not really changed. I
didn’t even attend our new believers’ class.

(...) things only God and I know.

Lord, thank you for reminding me that all things I went through are
not mine alone. After the warm minister of my sisters, I realized that
indeed I needed help. This battle is not mine alone. Lord, please
continue to remind me of the future that only matters--the day of your
coming where you will judge everyone on earth, including me. Oh
Lord, always remind me to look above when things in front of me are
falling apart. Remind me of your promises that never fail. Remind me
that we humans are nothing but flowers and grasses that soon wither.
Remind me of your precious blood shed in the cross. Remind me of
how precious my life is and how ultimate my purpose of existence.
Remind me of your glorious humility when you descended from
heaven. Remind me to bow my knees, raise my hands, and shed my
tears instead to grumble. Remind me that security and love only
found in You. Oh God, remind me that I belong only to You. Remind
me to fight with my knees for this battle belongs to You.

Jesus is King!
But one day while roaming God found out that his creatures were
often lost for the Earth was very dark. Humans went astray to the
realms of beast, therefore beasts devoured them. God was sad so He
created a light. Light is named Sun. Since then, Sun has been the
light of the Earth.

God roamed in the space one day and heard the cries of Sun. Sun told
God that he saw humans, beasts and birds having a companion and
children. God felt the loneliness of the Sun. The next day, from the
rays of the Sun, God created another light, a dim version of Sun. She
was named Moon. God saw that they are beautiful, and supported
them to bear their own children. Since then, Sun and Moon have
countless children, who are all named Stars. Since Sun and Moon are
working night and day, the two decided to bring their children in their
workplace.

So day and night, according to their work-shift, God saw Sun and
Moon with their children. On Sun’s Day shift, creatures on earth
couldn’t see his children because of his own light. But Stars still enjoy
observing the creatures on earth though they could not show their
light. On Moon’s Night shift, Sun and Stars accompany Moon while
working. In this time, Sun is hiding to witness the unique beauties of
his children while they are playing beside Moon. Through eternity, the
light family thrives.
Tomorrow

Never did I sorrow like this,

Of all my yesterdays
Neither did I glimpse back
To all my books
Thrown in the brooks
Never did I count the sunsets
Or the Petchay leaves and saggy sticks of Pansit I ate.
Of all my teaching days,
Never did I glance at students’ faces.
Never did I become this weak last year,
Never in November, nor in December.
Never did I hide the strings of a guitar
Never did I fear sacrifices in Your altar.
Never did I race
along the masses.
Never did I run away from the rainbow,
Or ruin me with the villains of my Hero.
Never did I touch the bow,
Even put a finger on Goth’s arrow.
The bow of the Rainbow
I know only for a few.
Next day is tomorrow,
Yet this sorrow ceaselessly grow
Oh, sorrow please leave my marrow
You are crawling all night, I pray you go.
Oh God, here I am so low.
Hold me firmly only to Your shoe.
Tell me not I am shallow.
Never untie me from You.
Oh God, bound me only to Your law.
All of them to my soul You can draw.
The Rainbow is my tomorrow.
Tomorrow I know by your perfect arrow and bow.
War

I was not there

Yet I remember
A war broke on September
Until the edge of Winston’s cigar.
World War Two
Aryans as foe,
London bridges
Berlin bricks
War in the sky
Tyrants among army
Jews among the ashes.
Bloodshed by Nazis.
Even laughed at Churchill’s wit,
Amid his already fat feet
He convinced boy Roosevelt
Even the old Stalin great
Wars in mythology
Trojans fall in the Odyssey.
I even believed at the foolish discovery.
Yes, of Zeus’ unreasonable fury.
War in the amazons.
Roots of Percy Jackson.
Wars and bombs,
A freak I was, I drowned.
Yes, of violence in the ruins
Of bombs and chains.
But I wept.
Yes, I weep
But not anymore of these
I weep out of guilt.
I weep for my own war of death.
I weep for running away from His feet.
War in my soul.
May not end a foul.
All I am is my commander
Who am I if not to Him I surrender.
I am nothing but a war of history
Unknown to World War History.
To this girl you see,
one thing I can say
she is more of a family
a summer in one rainy day.
On the day we met
she was not a seatmate
but a curly classmate.
Our friendship is sure a fate.
Now that I am free,
four years ago seemed yesterday.
She already came
before I met Him,
Until now, she’s a mystery.
Her smiles spring even in my sad story.
Though ours is opposite in season
we are still alike in every reason.
To where this journey will take us,
all I know is being blessed that we found us.
She is a sister,
sometimes a mother.
a golden castle in cemetery,
a classic song in my poetry.
Tantananan LJ!
Happy Birthday, he-he! (haha)
I hauled thorns today.
My bones are weary.
Clouds were my crown.
Yet my spirit is not down.
I am beyond blessed.
Even in times I seemed without rest.
My sighs of yesterday
were already miles away.
My grumblings forgotten.
Rainy days were tamed by the Only begotten.
I work to dig for a treasure
I work for the One beyond measure.
Just this night, my eyes fail
but my heart rejoices in His will.
My feet are in the cold marble floor.
My hands in the coffee I savor.
Later in the break of dawn
I might yawn but will not drown.
My words might snap and lose their spark.
But His will not be stopped and forever sharp.

The air carried to me His whispers.

The men told me about His wonders.
The rainbow is arching.
The flowers are smiling.
The sky opens above.
Today, to Him again I fell in love.

I heard His voice amid the noise.

I feel His peace amid the madness.
I saw Him even in the darkness.
I called His name without rest.
Christ, in You I am found.
In You I am going up though crashing down.
Saul was made Paul

His name was Paul

Once a Saul
A highly esteemed educated man was he
With riches and army

The letters in his hands

Are what I know from God’s commands
In pages with short letters
Saul was made Paul by One greater

For His sheep can hear the shepherd’s voice

So was he on the road to Damascus
“Saul, Saul, Why are you persecuting me?”
What he heard from our savior truly

Many sheep see the light

But only Saul heard in fright
For three days he lose his sight
Forever he lose everything and gain what is right

Saul was made Paul

Saul who was horrible to all
Saul who shed too much blood
Saul who in deaths made glad

At the moment,
I remember a Paul I met
A she was she
Her name is Marbee.
Growing up, I always thought my biggest world is my room at home.
And everything just fell messy and crazy yet fit at the pit of the
pandemic. My room. My room. My life revolved around the unlimited
illusion I created inside my room. It's horrible to reimagine everything.
My mind was entangled in all kinds of hypocrisy in books, and I
adopted them in daily basis. I became spiteful to everything. And
people barely know what's really inside my mind. I was horrible.

I didn't really grow up spending most of my time in awe of God's

creations. I hardly appreciate the sun and sky. The silent hustling and
the healthy living of country life. After God found me, I learned that
I’ve missed too much things, and failed in too much things.
I failed when I thought that my world ends in books.
I failed when I thought that my world is in my room.
I failed when I thought that my world is the internet.
I failed when I thought that my place is really in this world. I know I
failed.

But amid these failures in my life that put me in despicable misery,

God wins. He won me.

I thought freedom is in my books, yet they became my blindfold to

actual world. That's why, when I say that God still won me amid my
failures, it's because God with all His might turned my pursuit of
knowledge to the bible, a victory. I know since then that I won't
worship other authors beside God—the perfect author of my life.

Reading the bible, I don't know who I was seeking. But in the end,
God revealed Himself to me, and I know that in my heart He won me. I
wanted to clarify for some, that reading the bible is not what changed
me but God is. When I was seeking God after being convinced of the
gospel, I called to Him and though I was so undeserving He came. It's
about believing by God's grace.

The sky and sea with their vastness.

The sun and moon with their wonders .
The heavenly bodies and their mysteries.
On earth, the small and great with their beauties and uniqueness.
The humanity and their vain searching of the end of the world yet
never actually finding it.
for myself who once despised being outside:
marbs, HOW CAN U NOT SEE GOD?
"Claiming to be wise, they became fools."
I couldn't remember how many times God pierced me.

He rebuked my ways and I listened. He rebuked me for unbelieving.

He rebuked me for falling into the trap of foolish philosophers and
false shepherds. He rebuked my thoughts, my words, and my actions.
I'd never been glad to be rebuked that way in my life.

Admitting that I was lost and now found, was blind but now can see,
is a hard pill to swallow. Admitting that I was arrogant, miserable,
self-righteous, obstinate, and cynical is a punch in the gut. Admitting
that I was wounded inside is unimaginable. But on the cross of
Calvary, He showed me how much He got wounded for my sins, how
much blood He shed for me, and how much He loves me.

Truly understanding that I caused Jesus to suffer on the cross is the

biggest revelation ever unraveled in my life. It felt like being freed from
all the beliefs and principles I accumulated throughout my existence.
It felt like being freed from the constant shame and guilt. For the first
time in my life, I feel like it is fine to show my open wounds. That it's
fine to show my disgusting tears, fears, and defeats. For the first time
in my life, I felt like I could stumble and still be grateful.

I grow up being taught that He died for our sins, but I was not taught
of the profound meaning of His death and sacrifice for our salvation. I
thought His death is the plain way to salvation when the truth is not
at all plain and simple. It was wrong when I thought that believing is
sufficient for my salvation. It was wrong when I thought that believing
will discount my defiance of His commandments.

Before knowing Him I failed Him. And maybe now after knowing Him,
I might still fail him. But one thing I know is my life today is within
His palms. He's guiding me to His righteousness. Leaving my sinful
lifestyle doesn't even sting a bit. God made it easier for me to
overcome, all because of His never-abounding mercy and
righteousness.

Only to His work of creation, and work of redemption, I bow.

BEAUTY IN E T E R N I T Y
Morning I watch the sun brighter
As I fed firewoods to the fire
I have a day so beautiful
Have my breakfast in full

Then dusk came and I watched the sun set

As I swept all the dust from my sheet
I have a day so great
Before and After I close the gate

Then night came and I watched the ceiling

Like a spectator watching and wondering
My mind never leaves the sun
It's wondering about its beauty that ran

This I realized one thing

Tonight I can watch the moon sailing
Watch it appearing and hiding
Watch it till the hour of departing

A beauty in the sun and moon

I am wondering again this noon
Then night till dawn I wonder
On the tree I was under

A beauty in the firewood

Not everyone will consider but I would
In fire for which I used to stoke
The way they departed as a smoke

For two days I wonder about beauty

Beauty, beauty, I met one every day
How temporary they can be
Yesterday, today, and the next day

Yesterday, I found myself in sketches

In curves, colors and dresses
I remember this one summer
The dream to be a fashion designer

The next day, I was writing in poetry

Weaving rhymes along poets of century
I delighted in the weeping of poets
To their way of knitting tears and fates

Today, I am rhyming for Him

Far lesser to His psalms written
Now, I delight only to His beauty
For this I know not a temporary but an eternity

Not as one's short life on earth

So fleeting from birth to death
Wherein hope and joy, we leap and glow
In despair and sorrow, we weep and grow

Every day is a fight for eternity

A good fight against temporary
We fight for our hope in His glory
We fight for the gift given freely
B A T S' C A V E
I was a bat in a cold and dark cave. A bat living behind the veil of the
outrageous convention. I live hidden with other bats. Our colors black
seeping through the darkness, our eyes red full of wickedness, and
our fangs sharp full of deceits.

Inside the cave was a graveyard of death. A world of endless nights

where the sun was hated. Where no moon and stars visit. Where
colors ceased to exist. Where nobody wakes up because of the warmth
but for the coldness of tears pooling in their sheets. Where nobody
comforts one's pain for each of us has a jar of it. Misery and despair
are the conventions. The cave is raging with smoke unseen, like a
poison imprisoning us to stay the same. We are told, a great risk is in
the light. For in the light are rigid rules.

So we fear and stay together unknowingly infecting our diseases to

one another. The crippled bat crippled other bats. The cursed bat
cursed other bats. The miserable bat slapped others with misery. The
abused bat abused other bats. Then, weeping began to roar inside the
cave. We found no healing, so instead of searching for a cure, we
wound each other. We bite each other with the venom of foolishness
and blindness. With this, we are one. We are together.

B A T S' R O U T I N E
Inside the darkness, I lived and wept each day. Some days, this
routine broke my wings and bones. Some days, it gratified me fully
convinced I am strong. I feel loved, so I thought. A love chained to
despair and misery. In my wretched room, it seemed to me that love is
being tossed in the air, like a prisoner in the death-row, doomed to
receive slings of violence and arrows of death. With that, love died
inside the cave, so is hope for light.

B A T S' G O V E R N M E N T
For many years, the boundary between the cave and light grow bigger
and bigger. With the complete absence of light, confusion and danger
became the government. The cave became a dangerous labyrinth full
of wrathful dogs so willing to tear us apart. Fear and confusion
latched me completely.

B A T S' H O P E
I stood while other bats gave up their lives to wrathful dogs. I was
scared for my survival. But one day, hope came to me. A hope came
through a dream. I was told about the biggest door in front me. The
light in my dream testifies that a door saved her. She told me I have
the key all along. I woke up, and I saw the door. I asked myself, “Why
I hadn’t seen this door for many years?” Then a voice seems to answer
me from the other side of the door, it echoes, “Because you killed hope
inside your heart!” The voice came to me like a double-edged sword,
the truth in its edge pierced me, while the hope in the other edge
strengthened me.

B A T S' W A R
Other bats scorn me for opening the door as if a despicable thing to
do. But if there is salvation inside the door, then I will bear it. I strive
against the doubt and fear that keep on strangling me. The wrathful
dogs watched me while fighting against the agony of my false identity.
But as I glimpse in the door, light shone and reached my blindness,
resurrecting my eyes to see colors. The latch of fear and confusion
came into ruin. The veil of the convention has been tugged away. And
I opened the door of light completely. I am saved.

The Patient and

HIS SECOND DEATH

The ceiling is all white

A big window on my right
Nurses speaking imperceptible languages
I hid my face annoyed by their voices

I look around the room

I am confused so I search for my phone
I stand and roam
In the window, there's a moon

Stars are dancing around him

But below are shadows mixed in
I closed the window
Realizing the color of sorrow
What day is it?
Where is my cigarette?
Nurse came
Checking me so I feign

In the window, I peeped

Moon and stars left
Below shadows vanished
By the fault of light vanquished

The fault opened wide

There I saw Him died
When I blinked
I was on the brink of death

Falling in the depth of the fault

A dark one and above a lightning bolt
I trembled to look at my near end
Down, a bottomless pit, no dead-end

With another blink I made

I saw myself bleeding in the bed
No nurses came to help
I screamed in contempt

Another hour passed

In the lake of blood, I was cast
Gripping unto anything
Something for my saving

The smell of death suffocated me

Its stickiness clothed me completely
I was losing my breath
So I asked for my death

Where is the end of this suffering?

I need the ending
Worms seemed to hear my voice
They nested in me in rejoice

I wept so loud
No one is around
Then in the lake
Fire came as a wreck

I heard cries of agony

Millions with eternal misery
The strike of nightmare ends
He came ruining my chains
I stood trembling
For the death that is coming
I am pleading for salvation
Anything for redemption

His face didn't smile

Still, I wept, heard in a mile
He drained my tears
Told me about righteousness

He vanished in thin air

Carrying with Him my fear
I stumble towards the window
I saw Him entering a door so narrow

So I shout, "Where is my salvation?"

Again, I asked for redemption
This time, He smiles
"Patient, I entrusted you to nurses."

Then the vision stops

I let out a gasp
Outside, the sun
Full of warmth

Now I admit I am sick

I was dying every clock tick
I drugged myself to death
Now I am ready for the nurses' help

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and
to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.1 John 1:9, ESV

But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law who belonged to their
sect complained to his disciples, “Why do you eat and drink with tax
collectors and sinners?”

Jesus answered them, “It is not the healthy who need a doctor, but
the sick. I have not come to call the righteous, but sinners to
repentance.”LUKE 5:30-32

"[A]s for the cowardly, the faithless, the polluted, the murderers, the
fornicators, the sorcerers, the idolaters, and all liars, their place will
be in the lake that burns with fire and sulfur, which is the second
death. REVELATION 21:8

AUTHOR: KUYA KENT

Wherever I look, I see God.

I see Him in the tiniest ants and how sophisticated and organized
their colonies are. I see Him in the different types of animals, birds
and insects and how each of them plays a significant role in the cycle
of life. I see Him in the history of the earth and how one event at a
particular point led to the other. I see Him in the complex composition
of a human body and that every single protein in our bodies must be
in place for us to even exist. I see Him in the design of the solar
system and how Jupiter and Saturn are seemingly in their perfect
locations to protect earth from asteroids so that life in here could
thrive. I see Him in plants and how they provide oxygen with its
elaborate process, I see Him from the rising of the sun to the
appearing of the moon. I see Him everywhere. I see Him in His
creation.

When I look at the things that have been created, it's impossible not to
see the Creator, who planned, designed, organized and created
everything that you can see and even the ones that you cannot.
Indeed, HOW AMAZING AND POWERFUL OUR GOD IS!

BUT GOD
The waters prevailed on the face of the earth,
wiping every single thing enclosed in its girth.
The flood was of coon's age, to death gave birth.
But God recalled Noah, blew the waters, causing mirth.
The sons of Jacob grew hearts of jealousy,
toward their brother who had an epiphany.
To Egypt they sold Joseph, nobly suffered.
But God was with him, and rescue was offered.
How many do you think would die for you?
Think rationally, will it be one or even two?
For truly, one would scarcely die for the upright.
But God shows his love in that for sinners, Christ died.
Once were people who to the grave were led.
Disobedient in nature for in sin they were dead.
The lake of fire was their rightful place.
But God in his mercy, saved them in his grace.
We face countless trials that make us sad.
Impossible may seem at times but always be glad.
Be reminded that in the good times and bad,
there is a phrase of truth which is, 'But God'.

A SMILE AS IT RAINS
I lay in my bed as the rain pours outside my bedroom. I hear its
sound as it drops on the tin roof. I feel cold, so I put on my blanket.
It's so quiet, all I can hear is the pitter-patter of the rain. A look
outside my window, and it's gloomy. Seems like it's going to rain for a
long time. Then I noticed that in the midst of this rain, I seek for the
sun. More than I do when it's not raining. I can't see the sun because
it's covered with thick clouds. But I know that it's still there, it's still
shining. And when this rain is over, a greater appreciation for the sun
will I have. With this, I smile.

TO FEAR DEATH
Footprints were left by the boy on the bay.
He ran carelessly, merrily, joyfully and gay!
All he desired was to have pleasure and play.
Oh, what horror was awaiting him on that day!
Then by the sea he saw something he prized.
He thought how fun, and his heart was enticed!
Tempted by what he saw he went to the sea.
Straight to what he valued, for charmed was he.
But before his very eyes, a scene befell.
The treasure was transient, one could even tell.
For little by little the treasure sank to the sea,
but the boy still hurried to save it desperately.
He held the treasure just as it crumbled,
it swiveled to nothing and the boy was baffled.
"I was tricked!", he exclaimed in his breath.
For before him stood, the inescapable Death!
The next thing happened he was underwater,
forced by Death's hands seeking to murder.
He struggled to breathe, deprived of air.
Afraid, that he could no longer bear.
Then he was saved, for help in mercy came!
By the One who died though without blame.
The treasure was vain, he knew to fear death,
he followed Him and was given a new breath.
Footprints were left by the boy on the bay.
Joyfully obeying his Savior day by day!
Now, he neither seeks pleasure nor play.
Oh, what glory awaits him on that Day!

A SHEEP'S DREAM
A sheep closed its eyes but rather could see,
muddled images that were far from reality.
It laid on familiar ground with a hint of peculiarity,
and the air was reeking of utter melancholy.
There, it was unable to perceive time,
but the sheep was to be spared of any crime.
For one part was daytime and the other night,
dark it was on the left, on the right was bright light.
Now the sheep was already on slumber that was deep,
but even so it slowly went asleep.
Suddenly, a great voice was heard by the sheep.
It jolted from the ground and took a leap.
"The Shepherd has come!", the voice sounded.
And never had the sheep been more excited!
It quickly went to where the daylight was seated.
Behold 'twas majestic, so it was astounded.
To its knees, the sheep fell to the ground.
Tears rushed, but its face was far from a frown.
It felt emotions that threatened it to drown.
But relieved and at last, a crown!
The sheep then opened its eyes and alas, 'twas a dream!
But it felt so real and so it seemed.
Now, it wishes for hearts to be filled with fear.
As they see and realize, the Day is drawing near.

Lord, this is the first day that I am writing as a Christian, please guide
my hands and wisdom oh Lord. Lord by your grace I found a friend,
and she’s into writing. You know lord right in my heart that I love
reading and writing. I was so passionate of these things that I became
a lost sheep. The day when I met you is the best thing that ever
happened to me. It changed me. It redirects my dreams in life. From
that day, I turn my back completely from all the heavy dreams and
passions that misled me. I was empty and I will forever be grateful to
you for filling my heart with your grace, love and peace. Lord, I can’t
dance and sing, but I no longer think that I am giftless for you said
that each of us has gift and we can use it to glorify you. Lord, please
lead my heart to the purpose you wanted for me.

Love & Promises

Lord, I wanted to be back in poetry. I wanted to write my own psalms

about you. When I met you Lord, I know that my pilgrimage is
finished because I receive the greatest gift in this world but I know my
fight in this world is not finish. It was not beautiful but whats really
matter to me now is YOU, the most beautiful part of my life. I hold no
more any anger, hatred and sinful habits, and now I realized that the
more I obey you, the clearer I heard your voice. I don’t even worry
anymore about tomorrow, for I know that as you said tomorrow will
worry in itself. Lord, you are my confidence. I know there will be times
that I will be arrogant unconsciously if that happens Lord, remind me
that I am nothing without your mercy and grace. I know that this
world will hate me since as you said they hate you first so Lord, please
change my heart completely. Lord, give me faith, hope and love so I
can survive in this world. There will be heartaches and tests but in
that time with a heart full of love, faith and hope, I couldn’t be shaken
nor be discouraged. Lord, I need you in my life, Lord I am praying that
you will answer me. Please assign me to the school nearer to the
vineyard. It will be complicated but Lord, I really wanted to have a
community. Lord, you are my only hope Lord, and I pour all my heart
in this prayer. It will be hard in the boarding house I know but if
that’s the way to be near to you then I would like to take that
opportunity. I know lord that financial problem will always be a
problem but Lord, I survived this far and I know you will provide for
me.

I WAS A LOST SHEEP

Gone in the wrong field
False shepherd
Poisonous grass I was fed

Tongue was burning

Tasting every fruit without warning
Traveling till the end of the world
Sojourning along sold and fooled

One day I walked with passersby

The next day I said goodbye
Morning I saw a green grass
The whole day there I rest in rush

Morning I heard about burning bushes

The whole day there I stay and watch
My life is so-called constant adventures
So I heard from misled pastures
So as hopeless when sun went down
For in the whispers of death we drowned
Weep unheard, eyes blind
In the night, reaching every wrong kind

Seeping our own tears of worthlessness

Digging graves of foolishness
In years of darken journey
Holy Light visited me righteously

What I saw is a gentle wool

Snow-like, graceful and beautiful
The darkness of night waned
By the Holy name I was tamed

Before the epiphany I stood rapt

Finally, I woke up, I rise up
I met the good Lord
He embraced me to His fold

He lifted my veil down

He straightened my head’s crown
He drained my anger
Hatred, fears, all through His power

My heartbeats are fast

From me a sudden cry escaped like a gasp
My tears is a wild river that carried me
Towards the beauty of His glory

I heard the trumpets of fear

I stumbled and to Him I surrender
To whom I was birth for
The only savior, and creator

The good shepherd

To a few saved sheep I heard
The ever-loving
All-knowing, all-sustaining

They say, the Almighty

Who saved lost sheep through His mercy
My eyes are never lost to His beauty
It brightens through me

My wandering has come to an end

A new revelation unraveled
Through His bleed
I found the right field
When you look imperfect in every imperfect perfect angle but your God
is perfect. When you don't see yourself beautiful but your God is
beautiful. When you are clothed with insecurities but with God you
are fully armored with confidence and authority. When your smile is
not pretty but God creations said you are a beauty.

These days, I am rhyming death and misery where God saved me

from. But today, here I am claiming a whole life with love and
freedom.

The wind and water sang with life.

The leaves and trees danced in calmness.

The sky and sun lit everything into perfect.

TRULY, GOD IS LIFE.

And I will know Him for the rest of my life.

I've kept these photos in my gallery for many days. Normally, I would
delete them. But as I am learning to embrace my flaws, I begin to feel
less anxious and conscious in revealing who really I am as a person.
It's the overcoming the insecurity and shifting my perception on
beauty. God is beauty. And so long as I have God with me, I have
beauty within me.

Living the beautiful miracles of God. Joy. Peace. Love. Hope.

To choose a boarding house over my own room at home has been a

tough decision. Maybe boarding house is a good option for my
teaching internship and CSA classes at night but as I lived for almost
two years at home with my siblings, I would rather have the long
tough rides every night than the other way.

But when I meet Jesus, the resurrected Christ, I just know that I
found the greatest treasure in life, absolutely more than my studies
and desires for riches. And yes, I choose a temporary discomfort for
Him, so I can know Him more, and have Him more in my life, to
witness His never-ending miracles and to know what He truly did for
me in the cross of calvary. I know that my life before Him is not what
true life is. True life is when I am living under His graces and
commandments. YES, CHRIST IS LIFE.

(And I would repeatly say this, that before Him I couldn't imagine
thinking beyond the pleasure and comfort for myself. Until now, I still
couldn't move on from what Christ had done for me in the cross. I will
forever be amazed of His grace.)

PORTAL

0087MP122019
Password: 6MP@ra11033(5-7)

Tuesday, January 17, 2023

Lord, I am right here, ridiculed and opposed but I am standing strong

Lord because I know that You are with me. Lord, do you think what I
did is right? Lord, inside my heart I feel the real joy and peace of
defending your name. Lord, I am scared but I know what I did is right.
I am forever grateful to you Lord for saving me from all kinds of
deceits in this world. Now, satan is mocking me through the mouths
of my parents. But what made me happy is I finally told my mother
that I found my own church.

February 25, 2023, 7:36 PM

He is the Word,
I found shining in a lone road.
The Word true warriors wield as a sword.
He, the Word, who breathes the world.
The light in the darkness.
The only life in wilderness.
The water in the desert.
The living miracle pouring on Earth.
Our highest father,
whose light is forever.
Who carries us with His graces.
Who fills our hearts with overpowering happiness.
Our comfort from sorrows.
Our shield from life arrows
Our hope in every trial.
Our ally in every denial.
The Word who the world fails to understand.
The Word who the broken ran away from.
The Word who endures generations.
The Word who died for His creations.
He is the Word.
The Lord of the narrow road.

The mystery beyond men wisdom.

The humblest in the highest kingdom.