Ar

ranged:Mar
ryi
ngast
ranger
.

01
Phumza:
Gr owi ngupi nast rictlyol df ashi onedf ami ly, Iwasr aisedt obel ievet hatmydest i
nyasa
womanwast ogetmar ried, haveki dsandl i
vef ormyhusbandj ustl ikemymot her .Mymot her,
mybeaut i
f ul mot herl ivedf ormyf atherandhert wodaught ers,meandmyl ittl
esi ster .Fr om a
ver yyoungageIwasgr oomedi nt oawi fe, Ijustdi dn'tknowwhosewi f
eIwas.Idi dn' tlivea
nor mal li
fel ikeal ltheot herki dswhengr owi ngup.Mi newasal waysdi ffer ent ,fat herwas
alwaysst rict .Heneveral lowedmet ogooutandpl aywi tht heot herki ds, Ihadt ost ayi nwi th
mom andl ear nt hewaysofawoman.Looki ngaf terthehouseandcooki ng.Dadsai dt hatwasa
woman' sdut y, nott ogot ovar sityort owor k.Awoman' sj obwasathome, hesai d.Iwasn' t
allowedt odr eam bi gorbecl ever ,wheneverIt oldmyf atheraboutt hecompl iment sIgotat
schoolf rom myt eacher sandt hedr eamsIhad, heshutt hem down.Sai dIwasn' twhatt hey
sai dIwas, Iwasn' tt hatcl everandvar sitywasn' tforavi llagegi rllikeme, wher ewasIgoi ngt o
gett hemoneyt ogot her e?Hesai dt hatvar sitywasj ustanexcuset osendgi rl
sawaysot hey
canbehaver eckl essl y, comebackwi tht alkinguni ver sitycer tif
icat esanddi seases.Sono!
dreami ngbi gwasn' tf orme, heal wayssai d;"Zi ntlemt anam wher ehaveyoueverseenwomen
from ourf ami lygot ovar sityaf terwhathappenedt oyoursi ster?Doyouwantust obur yyou
l
ikewebur iedher ?Yourdr eam asagi rlshoul dbet ogetmar riedandhaveaf ami ly,your
husbandwi lldoal loft hehar dwor kforyou" .Myol dersi sterwascl ever, soocl evert hatshehad
bur sar yof fer st ogot ouni ver sityt ost udysci ence.Ourf at herbei ngt hemant hathewas( old
fashi onedandt r
adi tional lymi nded) ,hedi dn' twanthert ogobutmom beggedhi mt i
llheagr eed
tosendi nghert ouni ver sity.Ever yonewasexci tedf orherwhenshel eft
, shewasani nspi ration
toever ygi rl( thef irstt ogot ouni ver sit
y)i nourf ami l
ybutwenevergott oseehergr aduat e.She
didn'tevengett ocompl eteherf irstyear ,shecamebackdur ingt heJunehol idayssi ck.Ter ri
bly
sick, shewasn' tthebeaut if
ulgi rlshel eftas, herboneswer eshowi ng, emanaphunaphu.
Ebeyi nt oyebhedi nje, amont hlat ershepassedawayandsi ncet hendadpr omi sedhi msel fnot
tosendhi sdaught ersawayt ouni versity.Nowhehadmor er easont of or cehi st radit i
onalways
mor eonusbutt hatdi dn' tst opmef rom dr eami ng, Ihaddr eams.Dr eamst ogot ouni ver sityand
makesomet hi ngofmysel f,Iwant edt ot ravelt hewor ld.Iwant edt opr ovet oever yonet hatnot
ever ydaught erwasgoi ngt ocomebackf rom uni versi tyasacof fin.But .
..Att heageof16,
undermyf at her '
sor der sIhadt oacceptamar riagepr oposalf rom amanIhadnevermet
bef ore.Appar ent l
yhi sf atherwasbestf riendswi t
hmyf atherandt heyhadpl annedt omar r
yus
whi lewewer est i
llkidssoi tdi dn' tmat t
eri fIwant edt ogetmar ri
edorIdi dn'twantt o, whet herI
knewhi m orIdi dn't.Ifmyf at herknewhi m andsai dhewasgoi ngt obemyhusbandt hat '
s
exact lywhathewasgoi ngt obe, hesai di twashi sdut yasaf athert of i
ndasui tablehusband
forme.I twashi sdut yt omar rymeof fwhenhewant edt o, traditional l
owedhi m.Ir emember
runni ngt omymot hercr ying.Idi dn' twantt ogetmar riedt ot hismyst eri
ousmanbutdoyou
knowwhatshesai d?" Mar riagei saver ybeaut ifulthingmt anam andIpr omi seyouwi llfallin
l
ovewi thhi mi nnot i
me, hei sagoodboy.Hecomesf rom aver ygoodf ami ly, theyl ivei nt he
bigci tyt hatyouar eal waysdr eami ngofsoyouwi l
llovei tt here.Theywi llloveyouandt reat
youl ikeoneoft hem" .Asi fthatwasmeantt omakemef eelanybet teraboutt hedeci siont aken
forme, Ididn' twantt ogetmar ri
ed.Idi dn'twantt of allinl ovewi tht hisguyandIpr omi sed
mysel fthatIwi llneverf allinl ovewi thhi m.Anywayatt heageof16Ial r eadyknewt hatat18,
aftercompl et i
ngmat ricIwasgoi ngi ntomar riage.Andt hatwast hat...
.
.
2year sl ater ...
December15
Yandi sa:
ItwasasunnyFr i
daymor ni ng, Iwasbusyget tingr eadyf orwor ki nmyr oom.TodayIhadt o
j
uggl ebet weenbei ngonsi teandt heof fice, somydaywasl ooki nghect i
c.Iwor kedasa
const r uct ionmanagerf oroneoft hebi ggestconst ruct ioncompani esi nourci t
yandwewer e
busywi thacer tainpr oj ect .Byeveni ngIhadt obeoutoft own, cityandpr ovince.Ihadt oat tend
toaper sonalpr oj ectt hatIwasheadi ngwi thoutt hehel poft hecompanyIwaswor kingf or, i
t
wasmyper sonalbaby.Iwasi nt hepr ocessofst artingmyownsmal lconst ructioncompanyon
thesi desoIhadt opr ovemysel ftot hecl ient s.Iwast iredofwor kingf orsomeoneandmaki ng
theirpocket sf ati nst eadofmi ne.Icoul dmakeser iousmoneyi fIst artedmyowncompany, but
gett i
ngi tof ft hegr oundwasabi ttricky.Anywayaf terget ti
ngdr essedIt ookmybagandkeys
thenwentt ot hef rontandt ot hedoor .
"Zizi.
..wef et chi ngyourwi f et odaysoIhopeyouwi llbehomei nt imet owel comeher ",Iclosed
thedoorandt ur nedt ol ookatmymot her .
Me:Oh?Ma. ..
Icompl et elyf orgott hatPhumzawascomi ngher e,Ihavebeensoobusyl atelyt hatIcompl etel
y
forgott hatIwasget ti
ngmar r
iedi naweek.Ort hatIhadawi fe, t
hatIhadt obehomet o
wel comeher .Tobef ormal lyi ntroducedt oherf ort hef irstt ime, Iknowwhatyout hinking.Who
mar r
iessomeonet heydon' tknow?I 'llexpl ain, Iwasmar ryi nghert ogetmypar ent sof fmyback
andt of ul filal ongt imepr omi sebet weenf ri
ends( mypar ent sandt hegi rl'spar ent s).Our
par ent swer ebestf riendswhopr omi sedeachmar ri
agebet weent heirki ds( us)soyousee, I
didn'tr eal lyhaveasayi nwhoIwasgoi ngt ospendt her estofmyl ifewi th.Myl if
ewasal ready
plannedoutf orme, mydut ywast ol i
vei t.Ihat edt hati dea, t
ot hepoi ntwher eIevenhat edmy
ownf at her .Iknewi twasn' theal thy, itwasexhaust ing.Mypar ent swer est r
ictly
cultur al/tr adi tional (cont rolling)andt heyhavebeent ryingt ocont rolmyl ifeforyear s,
somet imesIt houghtt heywer et ryingt ol ivet hei rlivest hr oughus( meandmysi bli
ngs) .Oruse
traditiont omani pul ateusi nt odoi ngwhatt heywant edust odoandf orcer ulesi nt oourl ives.
Theyj ustdi dn' tal lowmet ol i
vemyl ifet hewayIwant edt oorevenhaveagi rlf
riend, especi ally
mom.Shedi dn' tappr oveofanyoft hegi r l
sIdat edbef oreandaf tert heyt oldmeaboutt hi sgirl
andt hei rpr omi set oherf at her ,noneoft hem wer egoodenoughf orherson." Mysonhast o
mar r
yagi rlofpr inci ples, onewhowi lllist ent ohi m, whoknowshowt ocookandcl ean.Agi rl
whowi l
lst artaf ami l
ywi thyoui mmedi at ely, notabanopat azanabal aphaedol ophi ni.Theycant
doanyt hing, alltheydoi st al kback.Theycan' tcookandt heyknownor espect ",shesai d."And
thisgi rlIf oundf oryoui sobedi ent ,gr ounded, shel istens, uzi phet hekahl emt anam, shei s
clever ,har dwor kingandr eal lybeaut iful ",andshewasokayyenashame.Isawheronceat
somevi rgi ndancer eedwhendadt ookmebackhomet oeMbongwenit ot r
yandconvi nceme
tomar ryher .Shewas16att hatt i
meandwhenIsawherIwasal i
ttleconvi nced, shewas
beaut iful .SoIgavef at hermybl essi ngst ogoaheadwi t ht henegot iationsunder1condi ti
on,
thatwedi dt hi ngsmyway.Iwant edt owai ttillshewasol derormor emat uret oi ntroduce
mysel fandt ryt opur suesomet hingbef or eevengoi ngi ntomar riage.Iwant edt omar r
yf orl ove
notf ort r adi tion.Buthowevert hingsdi dn' tgoasIpl annedt hem, rightaf tersheagr eedt omar r
y
me( byt hewayi tt ookher4mont hst oacceptmypr oposal ,thegi rlwasn' tbadgi ngbuther
par ent smanagedt oconvi ncehersomehow)aweddi ngdat ewasf or cedonus.Andi thappens
tobeonherbi rt
hday, whi chwast hiscomi ngSat urday.Andbecauseoft hedi stancebet ween
usandt heci rcumst ancessur roundi nguswehaveneverbeeni nt roduced, ever ythingwenton
wi t
houtourpr esencebutwewer ef ullyawar eofwhatwashappeni ng.
Her :Ihopeyou' llbehomebyt het imewegetback, nomor ewor kingl ate.
Me:Idoubtmama.I 'llbeawayonbusi nessf ort hewhol eweekbutI 'l
lbebackbef oret he
weddi ngday.
Her :Youandyourj ob!Ismi l
ed." ButZi ziyouhavet omeetbef or et heweddi ng, bei ntroduced.
Youdon' tknowanyt hingaboutherandvi cever sa, thi si syourchancet omeetandgett oknow
eachot her "
Ichuckl ed, t
hi swasst upi d.Whoagr eest omar rysomeonet heydon' tknow?Someonet heywi l
l
talktof ort hef irstt imeatt heal terwhent heysayIdo?Me!Idi dn' twantt odoi tbuti thadt obe
donef ort hesakeofmyf ami l
y.
Me:Mamawam omhl emeandPhumzawi llhavepl ent yoft i
met ot al kandgett oknoweach
otherwhenwear emar ried.Wenar elax, yourj obi sdone.
Her :Whati fyouhavenot hi ngi ncommon?
Me:I sn'ti ttool at etowor ryaboutt hatnowdon' tyout hink?
Ilookedatmywr i
stwat chandIwasr unni ngl ate.
Me:Ihaveameet ingi n30mi nut essoIhavet ogo.
Her :Ihopeal loft hiswi llendonceyoumar ried.
Me:Byema.
Iopenedt hedoorandwentt omycar .It hrewi nmybagatt hebackpassengerseatt hengoti n
thedr iver'sseatanddr ovet owor k.
.
.
Phumza:
Todaymysupposedl yf ami lycamet ot akemeawayf rom myl ovedones, fr om myhome, and
from myvi llage.Ihadal waysdr eamtoft hi sday, leavi ngt hevi llagef ortheci tybutonl yt ogot o
uni ver sityt ogetbet t
ereducat ion.Buthowevert hiswasn' tthecase, Iwasgoi ngt heret omeet
myhusbandf ort hever yf irstt i
meaf terseei nghi mi npi ctur es.Hi sf ami lysentmyf ami l
y
pict uresofhi mt ogi vet omeandvi cever sasot hat '
st heonl ywaywekneweachot her ,through
pict ures.Canyoubel i
evei t?Iwasgoi ngt obemeet i
nghi mf ort hef irsttime, andIwasn' teven
exci ted.Iwasner vousandscar edatt hesamet ime, Idon' tknowwhatIwasgoi ngt obeget ting
mysel fi nto.Idi dn'tknowwhatmyl ifeint heci t
ywoul dbel ike,ifIwasgoi ngt of i
tinornot .I
wasar uralgi rlwhoknewnot hi ngaboutt heci ty, Iwaswor riedaboutawhol elotofst uf f.Fitt
ing
i
n, bei ngaccept ed.OhmyGod!Thi swast hescar iestt hingIhaveeverhadt odo.Sayi ng
goodbyet omyf ami l
ywashar d, especi allymymot herandsi st
er .Wewer ebestf ri
endsandI
didn' twantt obewi thoutt hem.
"Don' tcr yl ittl
egi rl,youwi llseet hem agai ni naf ewdays" , shesai dwi pingmyt ears.Inodded
andwi pedmyst il
lfalli
ngt ear s, Icoul dn'tcont rol them.Mymot heral wayssai dIwasweak, that
Iwassof t.Ver yl ittl
eandst upi dt hingsupsetme.Idi dn' tknowhowIwasgoi ngt osur vivein
thatci tywi t
houtmyt wobestf riendst ot ellmet ost opbei ngweak, wi t
houtanycl osef ami ly.
>>>
Her eIwas, travel li
ngt oapl aceIhaveneverbeeni n.Apl aceawayf rom home, awayf rom my
l
ovedoneswi thcompl etest ranger st hatIwasmeantt or el yon.Iwasscar ed, Iwasscar ed
becausenowIhadt oputmyt rustont opeopl eIdi dn'tknowanyt hingabout .Theonl yt hingI
knewaboutt hem waswhatmyf athert oldme, andi twasn' tmuch.I twast hehar destt hingIhad
everhadt odo.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Iwasi nmywor kst ati
onpacki ngmybagwhenmybestf riend/ bestman( Mandl a)wal kedover
tomesmi ling.
Me:What 'supwi t
hyou?Whyar eyousmi lingl i
ket hat?
Him:Yourweddi ngdat ei sj ustar oundt hecor nerbr oandmeasyourbestman, Iwast hinking
wet hr owyoual it
tlebachel orpar tysoyoucanr emovet her ustbef or emar ryingyourvi l
lagegi r
l.
Ur ust i
leboy, whenwast hel astt i
meyouhadawoman?Butdon' twor r
yasyourboyIhaveyou
cover edandbyt het imet hi sgi rli sdonewi thyou, you' llber eadyf oryourweddi ngnight .Your
wi fewontknowwhatshegother sel finto!Shewon' tknowwhathi ther .
Ilaughed, Ihadnot imef orhi snaught yt alksandIdef i
ni t
elywasn' tgoi ngt ocheatonmy
"fi
ancee"daysbef oreourweddi ng.Ist oppedseei ngt hisgi rl;Chant elleacoupl eofmont hsback,
whenmyweddi ngi nvitat ionsgotout .Shewasf ur ioussoshebr okeupwi thme.Besi desIhad
tobeonmywayt ot heai rpor tt ocat chaf l
ightt oPr etor i
a.
Me:Eyawukahl endoda.
Him:Ayman, don' ttellmet hatyout hinki ngaboutwor kwhenyourweddi ngi sj ustar oundt he
cor ner .Youshoul dbecel ebr atingyourl astf ewdaysasabachel or.
Me:Ihaveacompanyt ogetof fthegr ound, Idon' thavet imet ogof ordr inksandcel ebr ating
suchst upi dity.
Him:Al i
ttlef unbef oreget ti
ngmar riedwonthur t ,youdeser vei t.Af teral lyou' llbeeat ingoutof
thesamemenuever yni ght .
Ilaughed.
Me:Pl easet hisi snor eal mar riage, Icanst il
lor derf rom ot hermenus.
Hi
m:Whati fyouf al
linl
ovewithher
?Orviceversa?
Me:Maybeshemi ghtcomeherealr
eadyheadoverheelsinlovewithmebutIwontandthati
s
apromise.
Hi
m:Youmaki ngami st
akehere.
Me:Soyoukeepsayi ng,l
etsgetgoi
ng.
Hewentt ogethisbagaswellthenwewenttotheparkinglot.Wegotonourcarsanddrovet
o
myhousef oracleansetofclot
hesthenhedrovemet otheairpor
t.Igott
her
ejusti
nti
mef or
myfli
ghtsoIsaidbyet ohi
m andwentt ocat
chmyf li
ght.

02
Phumza:
Wef i
nal lyr eachedourdest ination, Capet own.Lucki lyIwasawaket oseei tsbeaut y,itwas
breat ht aki ng.I twasbi gjustl i
keIhadi magi nedi t
, Ismi l
edandopenedt hewi ndowt obr eathe
thef reshai r.
Ma:I tsbeaut ifulr i
ght ?
Me:I tsr eal lybeaut ifulmama, butndosabaukul ahl ekaapha.
Ma:I tssi mpl er eallyandIam sur eYandi sawi l
lbehappyt oshowyouar ound.
Ishr uggedandl ookedbackoutt hewi ndow.Whenwegott ot heirhouse, Iwast oldt ogetof f
thecarandsoIdi d.Thei rhousewasn' tbignorsmal lbuti twasbeaut if
ul .Ihadneverseensuch
abeaut iful housei nmyl i
fe, Ilookedar oundandt hel andscapewasbeaut ifultoo.It hi nkIwas
goi ngt ol ovebei ngher e,itwasr eallybeaut iful
.
"comeonl etsgoi nside" ,Ismi ledandt ookmybagf rom t hevan.Thenf ollowedaf tert heol d
l
ady, sheunl ockedt hedoort henopenedandwewenti n.WhenIst eppedi nsidet hehouseIwas
blownaway, itwasbeaut iful.Thef urni turet heyhadohmyGod!wedi dn'thaveanyt hingl i
ke
thatbackathome.Thef l
oorIst eppedonwaswhi teandshi ny,whi terthanmyt eethl ol.Iwas
scar edofevenwal kingont hef l
oori ncaset hedustf rom t hevi l
lagef ellof ftot hef l
oor .
"Thi swi llbeyourhomenowandever yonet hatl ivesi nt hi
shousei syourf ami ly,soyouwi l
l
treateachot herwi thloveandr espect .Iam sur eyouar et i
redandyouneedt of reshenup. "
,I
l
ookedar ound." don' tbel ooki ngl ostnow, comeI '
llshowyout oyourr oom" ,agai nIf ollowed
aftert hewomant oar oom.
"Youwi ll shar et hisr oom wi t
hyoursi sterinl awf oraweekt henyouwi llmovei nt oYandi sa's
room.Af tert heweddi ngt hati s..
.OhYandi sawontbehomeunt i
lFr i
day" , Inodded.Ir emember
hert elli
ngmet hathewasawayonbusi nesswhi lewewer est i
llont her oadandImustsayI
wasgl ad, Iwasn' tlooki ngf or war dt omeet i
nghi m.Orevenget t
ingmar riedt ohi m, onemi ght
act ual lyt hinkaf t
ert woyear sImusthavewar medupt ot hei deabutno.Ij ustcoul dn't,itwasn't
happeni ng.I fi twasn' tf ormypar entsIwoul dn'tbeher e.
"Thankyouma" ,
sheshowedmear oundt hehousef i
rst.Wher eever ythingwasandhow
ever yt hingwor ked.Af terdoi ngsoIwentt ogetmysel fcleanedup, andagai ndr essedi nmy
bestdr ess.Longanddr owni sh.It henl aidont hebed, Iwast ir
edf rom t her oad.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Ihadj ustgot tenoutofameet ingwi thacl i
entandaf ewot herpeopl ewhower einvol vedi nt he
proj ectwhenmyphoner ang.Iqui cklyt ooki toutofmypocketandl ookedatt hecal lerI D, i
twas
mymot her .Shewaspr obabl ycal li
ngt otellmet hatt heywer ehomenow.
Me:Pl easeexcusemesi r,I'
lljoinyouonsi teshor tly.
Hi m:SoonIhope.
Inoddedt hent ookt hecal lassoonast heyt urnedt heirbackst ome.
Me:Mybeaut if
ul mot her .
Her :YuhYandi sayi ntoniwandi l
indisakangaka?
Me:Iwasst il
lt alki
ngt oacl ientmamasor ry.
Her :Okay, Icalledt otel lyout hatwej ustgothome.Akasemhl eYandi sa.Ukhul il
e.
Of cosshewasgoi ngt osayt hatbecauseshechooseher ,shewasn' tallthatt hel astt imeIsaw
her .Mymot herwasj ustexagger at i
ng.
Me:OkaymaIhopeyouhadasaf et r
ip.
Her :Wedi dbaby, ubuyani ni ?Youhavet oseet hisgi rl.
Me:AssoonasIam doneaphamama, It ol
dyounj e.
Her :Okaybesur et obebackbyFr iday, yourf at herdoesn' tli
ket hef actt hatyouawayonsuch
ani mpor tantt i
me.
Me:Whyam Inotsur prised?I fi twasupt ohim Iwoul dbemar riedbynow.
Her :HayiYandi sa!
Me:Iam j oki ngmamaIwi llbebackbef oreSat ur day, maybeonaFr i
dayni ght.
Her :Uzol i
ndaukut hethanayeecaweni ?
Me:Iguess, ther ei snot hingIcandomos.Letmegetbackt owor k.
Her :Okay, bye.
Me:Shar p.
WehungupsoIwentt oj oint het eam onsi te.
.
.
Phumza:
IwokeupwhenIhear dt wovoi cest alkingont opofme, Icoul devenf eelt heireyesonme.They
wer est aringandi twassoor ude, itmademef eel insecur e.Iopenedmyeyesandj umpedof f
thebed.Ist oodupst raightandf ixedmydr esst henl ookedatt hem.Theywer ebeaut i
f uland
soowel ldr essed.Theot herwasl ightandt heot herwasdar kincompl exion.
"i
st hi swhatmybr otheri smar r
yi ng? "thedar kski nnedoneasked.
"Olwet huhayi ..
.Wedi dn' tmeant oscar eyou" , saidt hel i
ghtski nned.
"It
sf i
ne"
"Okay, unguPhumzar ight ?Awusakhul e.Thi sisOl wet huandIam Zet hu", t
hel ightskinnedone
said.Ij ustnodded.
Olwet hu:Hayiumamadoesn' thaveachoi ceshame.Yohubhut iwi llbedi sappoi ntedandI
doubthewi llmar ryherwhenheseesher .Wher edi dtheyf i
ndher ?Justl ookatherhai r,her
dress.Ungumkhayanj e, uzi yekel el emansi si.Everhear dofi perf ume?Unukauml i
lo.
Ifakedasmi le,didshehavet ober udet hough?Wej ustmet ,wast her eanyr easonf orhert obe
rudet owar dsme?Tear si mmedi atelybur ntmybi geyesbutIst oppedt hem f rom escapi ng, I
toldmysel ft hatIwi llnotcr yoversuchst upidit y.
Zet hu:Ol wet hu!Youcangot ot heki tchen, mom i swai t
ingf oryou.
Inoddedt henwentt ot hebat hroom f irstt opeeandr insemymout h.Af terdoi ngsoIwentt ot he
kitchen, adi vi nesmel lwel comedme.Mymot heri nl awwasi nt her ecooki ng, shesmi ledwhen
shesawmewal kingi nt hr ought hedoor .AndIf eltsooashamed, shewaspr obablythi nkingI
wasl azy.Mom woul dbedi sappoi ntedi fshewast ohearaboutt hi s,shet rainedmesohar dbut
her eIwasf ai l
ingher .
Me:Iam sor ry.
Her :Whatf or ?
Me:Forwaki ngupl ateandnothel ping, IknowwhyIam her eandumako. .
..
Shei nterrupt edme.
Her :Don' tbesor r
y, youwer et ir
ed.Yourf oodi si nt hemi crowave, youmustber eall
yhungr y
sinceyour ef usedt oeatal lt hewayher e.
Me:Mi crowave?
Shel aughedandpoi ntedt oashi nymet albox.Whatwassoof unnyaboutmeaski ng, kalokwe
didn' thavet hesef ancyt hingsbackathome.
"Pul lthehandl et her e",Idi dasIwast oldt hent ookoutapl ateoff ood.
Her :Youusedt obesoshywhenyouwer est il
lal it
tlegirl,Icanseenot hinghaschanged.
Ilookedatmyf ood.Shepoi nt edt oadr awersoIopenedi tandt ookoutaspoon.Isatonachai r
anddugi n, sheopenedt hef ri
dgeandt ookoutj uice.
Me:I '
llpouri tmat hankyou.
Her :Al l
owmet ospoi lyou.Thi si syourspeci alweeksoyoudeser vet obepamper ed.Enj oyit.
Ismi l
edandt ookt hegl assofj ui ce.
"Thankyou" ,shenoddedandcont i
nuedwi thwhat evershewasdoi ngandsodi dI.WhenIwas
doneeat ingIwashedmypl atet oget herwi tht hedi shest hatwer einthesi nk.Af terwashi ngt he
dishesshet ol dmet ogobackt ot her oom t hatIwasi nsoIwentt here,thet wogi r
lswer eont he
bedt alkingatt het opoft hei rvoices.Ij ustst oodbyt hedoor ,Idi dn'
tknowwher eIwasgoi ngt o
sit.Zet hui nvi tedmet osi tont hebed.
Zet hu:Ol wet huhassomet hi ngt osayt oyou.
Shel ookedather .
Olwet hu:Iam sor ryforbei ngr udet oyouear lier.
Me:I tsf i
ne.
Olwet hu:Butyougot taal lowust ohel pyouwi thal ittl
emakeover ,wecan' tbeseenwi th
someonel iket hisandbhut ican' tbeseenwi thyoul ookingl iket hiseither.Theywi lllaughathi m
andmybr otheri smor el iket hei tt hingar oundher e, oneoft hegoodl ookingguys.
Irolledmyeyes, goodl ooki ng?Yeahr ight !
Zet hu:Andwecanst artwi thyourhai r,wantmet odoyourhai r?
Ishookmyheadbutshest oodupandt ookacomb, Vaselineandhai rrelaxer .Ihadar eallybig
afroandi twaspai nful socombi ngi twasj ustonebi gfuss, besi desIdi dn'twantpeopl eto
touchmyhai r.Onl ymom di dmyhai r,sheknewhowt obegent le.
Zet hu:Si ther e.Shepoi nt edt oachai r
.
Me:Isai dnot hankyou, i
buhl ungu.
Zet hu:Iwontber oughsosi t.Isatont hechai randshest artedpar ti
ngitt oputt hevasel i
ne.
Zet hu:Sot ellusaboutyou.
Me:Whatdoyouwantt oknow?
Zet hu:Anyt hing, yourage. ..ubuf undaphi ?Nj et hoset hings.
Me:Ther ei sn' tmucht ot el l
.
Olwet hu:Justt ellheral r eady.
"Urudel omt anayuh" !It houghtt omysel f.
Zet hu:Wewoul dl iket oknow.
Me:Igr ewupeMbongweni , ndifundephaf rom j uni ort osecondar y.Iwasdoi ngmymat ri
ct his
yearandhopef ullyndi zopasa, uhm andI '
llbe18onSat urday.
Zet hu:Onyourweddi ngday?Yougot tabet hel ucki estgi r
lever .
Me:Notr eal l
y, Idon' treal lywantt ogetmar ri
ed.Iam j ustdoi ngt hisbecausemyf atherf orced
mei ntoi t .Ihadot herpl ansbuther eIam sacr ifici
ngt hem f ort his.
Olwet hu:Whatar eyour eal lysacr ifi
cing?Youhaveanot herman?Youi nlovewi thsomeoneel se?
Me:No, Ihaveneverbeenwi thamanbef ore.Int ozokuj olawer eneverapar tofme.Iwant edt o
got ouni ver sityt ost udyf ur ther, makesomet hingoutofmysel fandt henmaybet hinkabout
falli
ngi nl oveandget ti
ngmar ried.
Zet hu:Okaywegetyou.
Me:Sodi dyoueverl iveeMbongweni ?
Zet hu:Yeahbutwewer er eal l
yyoungwhenwel eft.
Me:Howol dwer eyou?
Zet hu:Iwas10, Ol wet huwas4andbhut iwas11.
Me:Okay, myheadi sbur ning.
Zet hu:Let sgowashyourhai r
.
Igotupandwer ant ot hebat hroom t owashmyhai r,afterwashi ngitshedr ieditngehai rdr yer.
Yuht hatmachi negavemebut ter fl
iesi nmyst omachandt heyl aughedatmeever ytimeI
pushedi taway.Whenshewasdoneshet i
edmyhai rup.Ilookedbeaut iful.
Olwet hu:Atl east .
Me:Thankyousi s' Zethu.
Zet hu:Pl easur e, wewi llpl aititlat er.Youhavet ol ookbeaut i
f ulforyourbi gdaywi thourbr other.
Me:Okayt hen.
Shesmi led.
Olwet hu:Let sgoshowmom.
Theypul ledmet ot heki tchen.
Olwet hu:Mamabheka.
Ma:Awusemhl enont ombi ,yuh.
Me:Thankyoumama.
Ma:Butyouhavet ost opbei ngshy, wear ef ami ly.
Zethu:Shewi llgetusedt ousmamadon' twor ry, i
tsst il
l ear lydays.
Ma:Shewasal wayst hisshyanddownt oear thgi rlandOl wet hual waysbul l
iedherkeshame. ..
Olwet hu:Iusedt obul lyher ?
Ma:Eweyuh!Yougr ewupt oget her ,
nilandel ananoYandi sa.Ni mhl uphaandheusedt ohi tyou
allthet i
me.Youwoul dcr ybutyoucoul dn'tst aymadateachot her ,wewoul dseeyour unni ng
afterhim agai n.Akudl ali
se, nihleke.Weal waysknewt hatt het woofyouwer edest inedt obe
together .Ical ledyoumydaught erinl awt hedayyouwer ebor n, andt odayyouar er eal l
ymy
daught eri n-law.
Zethul ookedatmeal lsmi les, mxm bor i
ng!ButIf akedasmi le, Ididn' twantt ocomeoutasr ude.
Macont i
nuedt ellingusst or iesaboutussi sakhul a, t
heywer ef unnysowewer elaughi ng.Buti t
wasapi tythatIcoul dn'tr emembernoneoft hem, Iwast ooyoungt or emember .Wheni twas
ti
mef ordi nnerwehel pedhert odi shupt henwewentt ot hel ounget oeat .Af tereat ingIt ook
thedi shest ot heki tchenandwashedt hem i mmedi ately.Af terwashi ngt hedi shesIsweptt he
fl
oort henwentt oOl wet hu'sr oom.Theyst ar t
edpl aiti
ngmyhai rke, benzai ultratwist .
.
Theyf i
nisheddoi ngmyhai rt hef oll
owi ngdayar ound11andImustsayIl ookedbeaut iful ,l
ikeit
wasn' tme.Myeyesl ookedbi ggert hanwhenIhadanaf r obutIst i
lllookedr eallybeaut i
f ul.It
wasmyf i
rstt imewi t
hhai rext ensionson, dadneveral lowedust oputt hem onourhai r.But
afterseei ngmei nt hem Iwassur ehewaschangehi smi ndaboutl ettingususet hem.That '
s
howbeaut ifulIl ooked#bl owi ngmyownhor n.At11: 05mamacamei nt otel lust ogetr eady
becausewewer egoi ngt of et chourdr essesf ort hebi gdayandgooveraf ewt hingsj ustsoI
coul dhaveasayi nhowIwant edmybi gdayt obebutot her wi seever ythingwassor ted.Hayi ke
wewentt ohaveabat honebyoneandgotdr essed.At1myf atheri nl awdr oveust oa
bout i
quef ort hedr esses, Ihadt ofitmi neof cosandt heyhadt omakeaf ewadj ustment s
becausei twaski ndofbi gbuti twasbeaut i
ful.Sokemyf atheri nlawwasgoi ngt of etchi tlater
ngobamymot herwant edi thome, safeandsoundbyt heendoft heday.Thedr essmaker
promi sedt ogett hej obdonebyt odaysokewel ef tt ocheckoutt hevenuenj e,itwasbi gand
beaut if
ul.That 'sl ikeal lwedi d, therewasnot hingexci ti
ngt hathappenedt hatday.03
Adayl ater:Fr iday
Yandi sa:
Myphoner angdi st urbingmef r
om mysl eep, Ist retchedmyar mt othesi det ablenextt ot he
bedandt ooki t.
Me:Tat a?
Him:Hai boZi zi uphi ?Ithininai ntoyakho?Youri nl awsar eher eandt heywoul dliket oseeyou.
Me:Iam st i
llinPr etor i
at atabutIam comi ngbackt oday.
Him:Hayi klkZi zi peopl ear ewonder ingwher et hegr oom i s, theyar ewor riedt hatt heirdaught er
willbest oodup.
Me:Tat aIst illhavet ogoonsi tet odoaf ewi nspect ionsbutIpr omi seI 'l
lbet her ebef oresunset .
Him:Youbet ternotdi sappoi ntmeson.
Me:Justt r
ustmet ata, foroncei nyourl ife.Ndi thembe, Iwi llbet her eokay?
Him:Okay.
Me:Thankyou, letmegetr eadyt ata.Iwi llcal lyoubef oreget tingont hef li
ght .
Him:OkayZi zi sobonanat oni ght .
Me:Shar p.
WehungupsoIgotupandwentt ogetr eady, Idr essedi nbl ackguessj eansandt -
shi rt.Ical l
ed
room ser vicet oor derbr eakf ast ,theypr omi sedt obringi tupi naf ewmi nutes.SoIdeci dedt o
packmybagasIwai tedf ormyor dertobebr oughtup.Af ter10mi nut esaknockcamet hrough
thedoorsoIat tendedt oi t,tippedt heguyandqui cklyhadbr eakfast .Af t
ereat i
ngIwent
downst ai rsf oracabandi tt ookmet othesi tewewer ewor kingon.
.
.
Phumza:
Iwokeupwi thanupsetst omach, Iwasner vousaboutt omor row.Idi dn'twantt ocommi t
mysel ftosomeoneIdi dn'tloveandhadnopl ansofl oving, Icoul dn'tgetmar r
ied.Ishookmy
sister,Bul elwawhowassl eepi ngnextt ome.Theyar rivedyest erdayandIwassoohappyt o
seet hem, especi al l
yher .Shewasmymai dofhonour ,Icoul dn'tshar et hisdaywi thanyoneel se
buther .Shewasmybestf riendandr ock, ifitwasn' tforherIdoubtIwoul dbeal i
vetoseet hi
s
day.Whenf atherwasf orcingmet oacceptt hepr oposal Iwenti ntodepr essi onandshewast he
fi
rstt opi ckuponi t,
actual lyshet alkedmei ntot his.
Me:Bul elwa
Ishookher .
Her :Hmm?
Me:Ar eyouawake?
Her :Uf unant oni ?
Sheseemedi rritated.
Me:DoIhavet odoi t
?BecauseIdon' twantt o, uphikonal oYandi sa?Akekhoanddoyouknow
why?Hedoesn' twantt hisei ther .
Her :Kodwamt asewhyar eyoust ressingyour self?Hewi l
lbeher euvi l
enj ebet shoabazal i
bakhephezol o.
Me:Andi mt handi BulelwaandIdon' twantt o.
Her :Ist hatwhyyouwokemeupatt hishour ?
Me:Thi si sal lyourf aultBul el wa, ifyouhadn' tt al
kedmei ntoi t.
Her :YePhumzast opt hinkingwi t
hyourhear t,lookatt hishouse, yabonawher eyouwi llli
ve
afteral loft his?Mt aset hesepeopl ehavemoneysoyouwi llbepr oper lytakencar eof,youwi ll
getever yt hingyouwant .Maybet heymi ghtevensendyout ouni versitywhoknowsmt ase?I t
s
yourdr eam r ight ?
Inodded.
Her :Thendot hisuyekel entoyakho!Youdon' thavet ol ovehi m.
Me:Butmt aseandi mazi ,
whati fhei samonst er ?
Shel aughedandsatup.
Her :Thenhei saver ycut emonst er ,
oneIwoul dn'tmi ndmar ryi
ng.I fitwasme, Iwouldn'tthink
twiceaboutmar r yinghi m.Mhl eont hepi ctur es, i
magi neukubaunj anii nper son.Iwoul dn't
mi ndspendi ngt her estofmyl i
fewi t
hthat .
Me:Bul elwa!
Ihitherl apandshel aughed.
Her :Onaser i
ousnot emt aseIdon' tthi
nkhei ssomet ypeofmonst er,hisf ami lyseemsni ce.
Besi desdadt rust sthem t ol ookaf teryou.Uyazihowmuchdadi soverpr ot ectivewi t
hus,
especi al lyyou.Hewoul dn'tgi veyouawayt oamonst er.
Me:Butsi sinooneknowshowt heywi lltreatmeaf t
ert omor row, ngokubasancengeukuba
nditshat e.
Her :Tr uemt asebutcomedowni ftheyar emonst ersyouhavet her ightt owal koutoft he
mar riage.
Me:Iam scar edmt ase, Iam r eallyscar ed.Idi dn'twantt odot his.
Her :I'
llbebyyoursi dehol dingyourhandasal waysandi fyoudon' twantt ogetmar r
iedt heni t
s
fi
newewi llwal koutoft hatvenuet ogether .
Me:Thankyoumt ase.
Her :Akuveut efa, l
ookatyour self.
Shewi pedmyt ears,Bulel wawasal waysst r
ongert hanme.Shewast alkat iveandver y
protect iveofme.SheknewIwassof t
,coul dn'ttalkt osavemyl ife.Sosheal waysst oodupf or
meanddi dn' twantanyonet ot easeorsaycr apaboutme.Iwasgr atefulf orhavi ngheri nmy
l
ife,bot hasasi sterandf riend.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Hour sl at er...
Mom cal ledmeasIwaswal kingi ntotheai rport ,
shewasj ustmaki ngsur et hatIwascat chi nga
fl
ightbackhome.Daddi dn' tevenwantt ot al
kt omeanymor ebecausehet houghtIwasr unni ng
awayf rom t hebr idelolbutt hatwasn' tthecase.Ii nvestedphakweyant ombiandIwasn' tgoi ng
throwawayal lmymoney.Soaf tertal
kingt omom Ical l
edMandl a,het ookt hecal li
mmedi ately.
Him:Myout ti
e!
Me:Sur emyout ti
e,whenIl andyou' ll
bet heretopi ckmeupr ight?
Him:Shomyout ti
e!Justgi vemeacal lwhenyoul and.
Me:Shar pandmakesur et her ear edrinks.
Him:That '
smyboy!Youseenowuyat het ha.
Me:Shar pboy, willcallngoku.
Him:Shar p.
WehungsoIwentt oboar dt hepl ane.
>>
Ilandedi nCapet ownat00: 00, Mandl aandLubanziwer ealreadywai ti
ngf ormeatt heai rportso
themi nut eIst eppedoutt heexi twegoti nthecaranddr ovetoMandl a'shouse.Ical l
eddadt o
l
ethi m knowt hatIwasi nt ownbef orehehadapani cattack.
Him:Lal akeZi zi,youhaveabi gdayaheadofyou.
Me:Okayt ata.
Wehungup, therewasnowayIwasgoi ngt osl eepnow.Ihadt ocel ebratemyl astf ewhour sas
abachel or .
Me:Br ingt hedr i
nksgent s!Mandl aIhavet obeatt heweddi ngvenueont i
me, ifIam notyou
aret obl ame.
Him:Youdi dn' tmakemeyourbestmanf ornot hing,I'
llmakesur eyouont imeboy.Wewoul dn' t
wantyourf athert ogobal li
st i
conus.
Me:Shar p!
Theygavememydr i
nkandt urnedt hemusi cup, wewer ealone.Hi spar ent swer eatmyhouse
doingGodknowswhat .Iopenedmydr i
nkandt ookasi p.Thent heyst artedt hrowingi nadvi ces,
somewer est upidbutsomeIwasdef initelytakingi ntomy" mar r
iage".
.
.
Phumza:
Mymot herwokemeupwi t
hahotcupofcof fee,Ihar dlysleptlastnightsoi twasgoi ngtohel p
mest ayawake.Isatupandt ooki t.
Me:Thankyoumama.
Shesatdownont hebed.
Her :List enmt anam, todayyougoi ngintomar ri
ageasagi rlbutbyt omor rowmor ningyou' llbea
youngwoman.I t
sscar y, IknowbecauseIhavehert here.Andi tisunder st andabl esi nceitwi l
l
beyourf irstt imebutyouwi l
lhavet otrustyourhusband, hewonthur tyou.I twi l
lbepai nf ulbut
youwi llhavet oendur et hepai nbecausei tisnor mal .Andaf t
erthepai ni twi llcomepl easur e.
Baby. ..
Me:Butwhati fIdon'twantt o?Li kemamaIhavenevert houghtofdoi ngi t.
Iwasal waysshy, terri
fiedofboys.Iwast het ypet orunawayorhol dmysi st er'
shandwhena
boywant edt ot alktome.HowwasIgoi ngt osur vivet hi
s?HowwasIgoi ngt ogivemysel ft o
him?
Her :Communi cationi st hebestkeyt oaheal t
hymar r
iage, talktohim abouti t.Hewontf orce
youbutyoucan' tsayno, ithast ohappen.Rememberyouar eher etobui l
dahomehayiukuba
yintombi .
Ilookeddown.
Her :Youcan' tr efusehi m whatbel ongst ohim otherwi sehewi llgolooki ngsomewher eelse.
Me:Hahmama.
Her :Kal okmt am youaboutt ogoi ntowomanhood, Ihavet ogi veyouadvi ces. .
.Ial mostf orgot,
thisisf oryou.
Shegavemeabox, Iopenedi tandt ookoutasetofnewunder wear sandashor tnightdress.
Okayt hesewer esexyandl acy.Icl osedt heboxandputi taside.
Me:ThankyouIguess.
Her :Thesear eonl ymeantt obeseenbyyourhusbandonl y,justli
keyourbody.Uzi hloniphe
mt anam andr espectyourhusband, suppor thim andl ovehi m.Umt hobel e, makesur eyout ake
goodcar eofhi m, ungasi phoxi Phumza.
Me:Ohmamawhati fIcan' tdoal loft heset hi
ngs?
Her :It aughtyouwel lngekeuhl uleke...Dri
nkyourcof feet hengohaveabat h, yoursi sterandI
willhel pyougetdr essed.
Me:Thankyoumama.
Her :Happybi rthdaybaby.
Ismi l
edandhadmycof fee.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Iwokeupwi t
hat er ri
bleheadache, wor setheboyswer emaki ngnoi sei nthel oungeandt he
musi ct heywer epl ayingwasdr ivi
ngmei nsane.Itwasl oudandbangi ng.Wesl eptar ound4so
youcani magi nehowt ir
edIwas.Iwaspr obabl ygoingt of allasleepatt heal t
ert oday, imagi ne
ever yonel ookingandwai t
ingf ormet osay" Ido"kodwanyangobandi l
elel olthatwoul dbe
hilarious.
Mandl a:Eyndodai tstime.
Hewasal ldressedandr eady.
Me:Don' tyouhaveheadachet ablet s?
Him:Hangover ?
Me:Eypooi ..
Hegavemet wot abl etsandagl assofwat er.
Mandl a:Ihaveyousor tedboy, Iwentt oyourhousef oryoursui tsoever ythingi sr eady.You
justneedt ogetcl eanedupandIam t akingyout oyourwi f
e.
Me:I si treal l
ymyweddi ngt oday?
Icoul dn' tbel i
evet hatIwas" set tli
ngdown" ,mna?
Him:Sur eboyandi tsnott ool at etochangeyourmi nd.
Ishookmyhead.
Me:Andt urnthi sdayt omyf uner al?Ha- ahf atherwoul dgocr azy.
Him:Eypl usyourf ather ,Iwoul dn' twantt omesswi t
hhi m.
Me:Yeahbesi desmom t hi nksshewi l
lmakeaver ygoodhousewi f
e, Idon' thavet oloveheror
takeheranywher ewi t
hme.Ij usthavet odot hisforthem, keept hef ami l
yt oget her .ThenIcan
dome.
Him:Ihopeyouknowwhatyoudoi ng.
Me:Ihopesot oo.
Him:HaveashowerI '
llmakeyouacupofcof feetokeepyouawake, wedon' twantyouf alli
ng
asleepatt heal ter.
Me:Shar pboy.
Iwentt ohaveaqui ckshower ,af t
ershower ingIgotoutt ol oti
onmybodyt hengotdr essedi na
blackandwhi tet uxedo.Il ookedatmysel finthemi rror ,
Ilookedgood.Li keIwasgoi ngt oa
classyrest aur antopeni ng.Il ookedhot ,
ifImustsaysomysel f.
"Thereyougopooi ",hegavemeacupofcof fee.
Me:Ineedsomet hi ngst rongt ocal mt hener vesnott his.
Him:Al cohol ?No, havecof fee.Youhavet obesobersot hatwhenever ythinggoeswr ongyou
wontsayyouwer et i
psyordr unk, youwonthaveanexcusef orgettingint hi
sr idi
culous
mar ri
age.
Me:Youwor set hanmyf at her .
Hel aughed.
Him:Tur nar ound.
Iturnedar oundt of acehi m, hehel pedmewi thmybowt i
e.
Him:Whowoul dhavet houghtt hatatt heageof25Iwoul dbehelpingyougetdr essedf oryour
weddi ng?ThatIwoul dbebyyoursi dewi t
nessi ngyousayyourvows?
Hebr ushedmyshoul der st hent urnedmear oundt of acet hemi r
ror.
Him:Per fect !
Me:Thanksman, Idi dn'tknowei ther .
Hel aughed.
Him:Youdoi ngt hi sbr o?At25br o?Ar eyousur e?
Me:YeahmanandIj usthopeal lgoeswel ltoday.
Him:ThenIam 100%behi ndyou, congr atul at i
onsman.
Hepat tedmyshoul der .
Him:Yout heman, abet termant hanme.Iwoul dneverdowhatyouar eaboutt odo.
Me:Thanksbr o...Wher ear et hoset hi ngsIaskedyout okeepf orme?
Him:Ri ghther einmypocketbr o.
Het ookoutZi ntle'sr ingf irst, 8kar atpur egol d.Mypar entsboughtther ingsf orus, t
her ewas
nowayIwasbuyi ngr i
ngsaf terhavi ngt opaysomuchl oboloforsomeoneIdi dn'tevenl ove.
Mi newasal sosi mpl egol d.
Me:Don' tlooset hem.
Him:Youner vous?
Me:No.
Him:Don' tl i
et ome, Iknowyou.
Me:Idon' tknowwhatt oexpectbr o, t
hatgi rlmi ghtl eavemeatt heal t
erandI 'llbethet alkofthe
town.RememberwhatChant ellesai dwhenwor dgotoutt hatIam get t
ingmar ri
ed?
Him:Thatwonthappenman, notwi thyoul ooki ngt hisgood.Phumzai snotl eavingyouatt he
alter
.
Me:I '
m scar edbr o.Whati fshei scr azy?Toocl ingy?
Hel aughed.
Him:I t
snott ool at et ocal litof f.
Me:Youhavenoi deahowmuchIwantt odot hatbutIcan' t
.Itstoolatenow.
Him:Iam sur eyouonl yl ooki ngf orwar dt oonet hingandonet hi
ngonl y!
Us:Pussy!
Wel aughed.
Me:Andshebet terdi shi t,Ican' tgetmar riedf ornot hing.
Him:Whati fshei sst il
lavi rgin?
Me:Shei sbr okl kIsawherpha.
Him:Thatwast woyear sago.
Iscratchedmyhead, pussyi spussyr ight?ButIwoul dn'twanthert obet ouched, theypr omised
meanunt ouchedwi feandt hat '
swhatIwant ed!
Me:Ihopeshei sst il
lonebecausei fshei sn' tI'l
lwanthal fofwhatIhadpayf orherback.
Hel aughed.
Him:Iguessyouwi llfi
ndoutt onight .Your eady?
Him:Iguess, yeah.
Him:Let sgetyoumar ri
edbr o.
Wewal kedoutofhi sr oom andwentt oj ointheboysi nthelounge.
Mandl a:I t
st i
meboys, itst imet ogetourboymar ried.
Theycheer edandwewentout sidet ogeti nourcar s,Mandlawasdr i
vingme.Wehadt ohi rethe
brideandt hegr oom' scar sof cos.Assoonast hecar sstar
tedmovi ngsodi dt hehor ns, passing
bymyhouset hent ot hevenue.
.
.
Phumza:
Whenwehear dhoot ersout sideweal lrant othewi ndowt opeek, Iwasn' tevendr essedkeat
thatt ime.Ihadj ustgot tenmyhai randmakeupdone.
Zethu:Theysuchshowof f
s.
Theyal llaughedbesi desme, t
hener veswer er eallykickingin.Iwascommi ttingmysel fto
someoneIhadneverspokent o, someoneIknewf rom apicture.Ididn'tknowhowt hingswer e
goingt ot urnoutt oday, Ididn' twantt obel eftatt heal t
arthough.I magi near unawaygr oom
yuhi hlazo!
Mom:Okayever yoneout , i
tst i
mef orhert ogetdr essed.
Theycompl ainedbutwal kedoutanyway.
Ma:Don' tbescar edbaby.
Me:Easyf oryout osay, younott heonewhoi sgoi ngt omar rysomeoneyoudon' tknow.
Ma:Ial sodi dn' tknowyourf atherbutl ookatus, wehappi l
yinlove.
Me:Don' tyoueverr egr eti t
?
Her :No, never .I '
llmakeyoul ookbeaut ifulvha?
Inoddedandt ookof fthegown, Iwor eapant yt hengoti nt
omyweddi ngdr ess.Theyhad
adjust edi tt ohugever yhuggabl epar tofmybody, itwasasl i
mf itallt
hewayt omykneesbese
i
vul ekekanci nci aphaezansi .I thadal ongt railbutnott hatlong.Ilookedst unni ngi nthedr ess,
Ilookedl ikeasl im ver sionofKi m Ki ni t
.Itwasn' tlikeeveryot herweddi ngdr ess, Iguesst hat's
whyIl ovedi t
.Iwor emyshoes, mom putont hevei landcover edmyf ace.ButIr emovedi t,I
want edt oseePhumzaMaj olaf ort helastt i
mebef orebecomi ngPhumzaDl ami ni.Ilooked
stunni ng, thedr essandmakeupwow!Ihadneverseenmysel flookingt hatbeaut ifuland
curviliciousbef or e,never !
Bul e:Umhl emt ase.
Me:Thankyoumt ase.
Bul e:Don' tf orgetwhatIsai d.
Me:Thankyoumt ase.
Shet ookmyhandandwewal kedoutwi thmom ul ulati
nginf r
ontofus, myf athersmi ledwhen
hesawmeandcamet ot akemyhand.
Him:Youl ookl i
kear eal princess, umhl ent ombam.
Me:Thankyout at a.
Him:Ar eyour eady?
Me:Iguess.
Heki ssedmyhandt henwal kedmeoutt ot hecar .Wegotonanddr oveof ftot hevenue.

04
Yandi sa:
Iwasget ti
ngr eall
yi mpati
ent,kudal
asi fi
kil
ebutt hebr i
dewasnowher etobeseen.Myonl y
worrywasmet urningtoalaughingst ockafterIhadt ogot hroughsomucht omar r
yt hi
sgirl
.I
hadt obr eaksomeone' shearttomar r
yt hi
sgi r
l,Ihadt osacri
ficemyownhappi nessf ormy
family'ssot hi
scoul dn'
tgowr ong.Nottodayanddef i
nit
elynotli
kethi
s,Ihadalreadywar med
uptot heideaofbei ngwi t
hherf ortherestofmyl i
fe.Andever yonewasheretowi t
nessme
saying" Ido",Icouldn'tbestoodup.Il ookedatdad, helookedcalm.Howcoul dhebecal m ata
ti
mel iket hi
s?
Me:Uyabonaket ata?Yourpeopl ewil
l makemeal aughi ngstockapha,youseeal lthesepeople
here?Theywi lllaughatmewhenshedoesn' tshowup.
Dad:Lookwhoi si nt hehur ryt ogetmar ri
ed.
Me:Ha. at atat hisi snot imef orjokes.
Hechuckl ed.
Dad:Rel axt heyar eont hei rway, Ijustspoket oherf at her .Let sgoi nsi de.
Me:Ha. aIwontgoi nt her et il
lIhearahor norseehercarar r
ive.Iwon' tgoi nt her eonl ytobe
embar rassed.
Goddamn!WhywasIsooner vous? !
Him:Kul ungi lest andher ekeIam goi ngi nsi de.
Hel eftmeoutt her ewi thMandl awhowasal sot ryingt ocal m medownbutIwasn' tgoingt o
untilIsawherar ri
ve.About5mi nut essi mi l
ewehear dhoot ersf r
om adi stanceandt heywer e
gettingcl oser ,thatwasmybr ide.Smi lesescapedourl ips, whywer eweevenhappy?
Mandl a:Yourbr i
dei sher e.
Me:ThankGod, letsgoi n.
Him:Wedoi ngt his?
Me:Iguesssoboy.
Hef ixedmybowt i
et henwewenti nsi det owai tf ormybr ide.Assoonassheandherf ather
stoodatt heent r
ancemyhear tcr eat edi tsownmusi c, i
twasbeat ingoutofmychest .Iact ually
thoughtt hi swoul dbeeasybuti twasn' t,Iwasaboutt ocommi tmysel fi nanodi vor cemar ri
age. .
Iwasner vous.Il ookeddownt henatt hedoorasasongst artedpl aying, ever yonet urnedt olook
ather .Shel ookedl ikeanangel ,breat het aki ng.Thedr esshuggedherbodysoowel landboy
wasshel ooki nggood.Asshet ookst epst owar dsmemyhear tbeatf astandl ouder ,Iwas
shaki ngoutofmypant s.
Mandl a:Sowhat 'syourt akenow?St illgoi ngt ol eaveherathome?
Hegavemeaf acecl othandIwi pedmyf ace, shej ustmademyt emper atur er i
se.Goddamni t!
Phew!Cant hel or dj ustt akemenow?
Me:Mostdef i
ni t
el ynot ,canyouseeher ?
Mandl a:Shei sf inebr o.
Me:Iknowbr oandt hatwi l
lbeal lmi nei nj ust5mi nut es.
Shewasn' tshor tnort all...justaver agebutshor tert hanmebecauseIwast all.Shehadabody,
slenderwi thi ndawozokubambhel ele.I '
mt alkingt inywai standl itt
lebi tofhi ps, justmyt ype.
Shehadt hatmodel body, sexy, notper f
ectbutsexy!Justal i
ttlecur vy.Whenherf athergave
meherhandIt ooki t, givi ngi tasof tsqueeze.I twasmywayofgr eet i
ngandsayi ngt hisi sme
uYandi sa, letsdot hi s.Wet urnedt of acet hepr iestbutIcoul dn' tgetmyeyesof fher ,evenunder
thatvei lIcoul dhearherbeaut yscr eami ngatme.Ij ustt houghtwowcoul dt hisbel oveatf irst
sight?Fi rstt ouch?Whywasmyhear tf ail
ingme?Ipr omi sednott of al lforher , Iwasr eadyt o
betoni t....Wewer ei nt roducedt oever yonet henhet ol dust of aceeachot herandf inallyt o
removet hatvei l soIcoul dhaveal ittlepeekatmybr ide.Il ift
edi tupcar ef ull
yonl yt of i
ndmy
darkbeaut ycr yingsi l
ent lybutshewasst il
lsodamnbeaut iful,shehadt hosepout edl ipsl i
ke
MeganGoods.Theywer esexyandherbi gbr owneyes, If eltlikesi ngi ngpr aisest oher ,danci ng
andcel ebr ati
ngwi thmyboys.Thef eel i
ngwasunexpl ainabl eandt ot hinkt hatIdi dn' twantt o
mar ryt hisgi rlallt hiswhi le.
Priest:I sshet heone, yourmi ssingr i
b?
Inodded.
Him:Ar eyousur eson?
Me:Mostdef i
ni t
el ysi r .
Ourmot her sul ulated, wavel ewakhal akakhul uumt u.Whatdi dIdokengoku?Wasn' tIsupposed
tosayyes?Iwant edt owi pehert ear sbutIdi dn' tknowi fshewoul dl etmesoIj ustst oodt here
prayingt hatshewoul dst opcr ying, hert ear sf reakedmeout .Anywoman' stear sf ort hatmat ter
.
Hermai dofhonourwi pedhert earsandwhi sper edsomet hingi nherear ,shenoddedsl owly.I
hadt ocoverherf aceagai n,thent heser vicebegan.Mypar entshadaskedt hepr iestt ocutout
theobj ect ionpar tsowej ustmovedr i
ghtahead, gott ot hepoi nt .
Priest:DoyouYandi saQhaweDl ami nit akePhumzaMaj ol aasyourl awf ullyweddedwi fe,to
l
oveandt ocher ish, insi cknessandi nheal t
ht illdeat hdoyoupar t?
Me:Uhmmm. .Ido.
Priest:DoyouPhumzaMaj olat akeYandi saQhaweDl ami niasyourl awf ullyweddedhusband,
toloveandt ocher ish, insi cknessandi nheal tht i
lldeat hdoyoupar t?
Her :..
...
Thepr iestr epeat edt hequest i
onbutst illnor esponsef r
om her .Her epeat edi tforthet hir
dt i
me
andst il
lnot hing, IlookedatMandl aandhemi med" relax"butIcoul dn' trelax.Iwant edtowal k
awayi ncaseheranswerwasno.Her epeat edt hequest i
onf ort hef or tht imeandt hat '
swhen
shenodded.
Her :I-
-d- o...Ido.
Isighedoutofr elief ,Idi dn'twanthert osaynohah.Iwasgoi ngt ol oveher .Wesai dourvows
put ti
ngr i
ngsoneachot her sf i
nger s, crazyenoughImeantever ywor d.Idon' tknowabouther
butIdi d.
Priest:Byt hepoweri nvest edi nmeInowpr onounceyouhusbandandwi f e,youmayki ssyour
bride.
Finally!!!Ismi l
edandr emovedt hevei lfr om herf ace, Isteppedcl osert oherandt ouchedher
cheeks.Iwi pedhert ear susi ngmyt humbst henki ssedherf or ehead, j
ustbei ngagent l
eman.
Priest:Ar eyouscar edofher ?Ki ssyourbr i
de, umbambheut himanqanj e.
Att hatmomentIf el tlikel aughi ngbutIhel di tin.Ishookmyheadsmi ling, Ihel dherchi nupso
shecoul dl ookatmebutshequi ckl yl ookeddown.AwuIhel di tupagai nt hengavehera5
secondbabyki ss.Peopl escr eamed, somecl apped, someul ulat edandmyboys. .
.t
heywhi stled.
Wewer egi ven5mi nut est osi gnf or msf orourmar r
iagecer ti
ficateandanewgr eenbookf or
her .Whenwewer edonewegotupandst oodi nf rontofever yoneagai n.
Priest:MrandMr sYandi saDl ami niever yone.
Ourpar ent sul ul at edoutofj oyandhappi ness.Andsi ncewedi dn' thaveanypr acti
cedst epI
tookherhandandl edheroutoft hechur ch, wewer egoi ngt ot akepi cturest henheadt oour
recept ionvenue.Whenwewer eout sidepeopl easkedt otakeaf ewpi cturesofussoweposed
thenIl edhert ot hecar ,Mandl awasst illmy/ ourdr i
ver.
.
Int hecar :
Shecoul dn' tevenl ookatme, shej ustl ookedoutt hewi ndow.Thi smadei tal ittl
ehar dformet o
sayanyt hing, Iwasaf raidofsayi ngal lthewr ongt hingsi ncaset hewor dsf ail
edme.Iwasnever
thet ypet obescar edoft alkingt oagi rlbutwi t
hher ,eisht hingswer edi ffer ent.Ilookedather
handt hent ouchi t,shequi ckl ymovedi tawayf rom mi ne.
Me:Phumza. ..
Shel ookedatmet henbackout sidet hewi ndow.
Me:Hi , uright ?Shenodded." I'
m sor ryt hatIwasn' ther etowel comeyouuf ika"
Her :It
sf ine.
Me:Fi ne?Younotangr y?
Her :No.
Thi skidwascol dyoh, likeshecoul dn'tevenl ookatmeatl east .Gi vingmeonewor danswer s,
comeon!Iwast ryingt omakeaconver sat ionher e!Hayit hiswasgoi ngt obehar dshamengeke
sozeuve.Mandl al ookedatust hr ought her earviewmi r
ror.Heshr uggedhi sshoul dersandI
shr uggedmi ne.Hemi med, "saysomet hi ng"andIshookmyhead.Iwasn' tgoi ngt odot hat,
ucol dqhi thil omt ana.
Him:Umhl emakot ikamf ethu.
Her :Thankyou.
Shewi pedherf ace, wasshest illcryi ng?Hai bodi dsomeonef or cet hi sgi rlt osayyest ome?I
meancomeoni fshedi dn' twantt hisshecoul dhavewal kedoutmos.Mandl apromot edagai n
andIj ustr olledmyeyesandl ookedoutt hewi ndow, helaughed.
Wewer equi ett illwegott oourvenue.Af terpar kingwegotof f,itwasqui etandbeaut if
ulsowe
quicklyt ookpi ct ures.Phumzawasuncomf ortablear oundmesot aki ngpi ct ureswi thherwasa
mi ssioni mpossi blebutwemanagedt ogetaf ewgoodonest henheadedt ot her eception
venue, Bayhot el .
.
.
Phumza:
Thedaywentwel l,theweddi ngwentwel l.Ever ythingwasbeaut if
ul .Iwasbeaut if
ulandt he
groom washandsome, mor ecut tert hani nt hepi ctures.At alldar kyguybuthewasal i
ttl
e
l
ight ert hanme.Al ittlebuf fedup, dimpl esandr eallysexyeyebr owsandsmi le.Hisl i
pswer ea
l
ittl
epi nk, aver agesi zel i
kemi ne.Hewasagent leman, hehel dmyhandandwi pedmyt ears
duringt hespeechesf or m ourpar ent s.Thespeecheswer ebeaut i
fulandemot ional, especi ally
Bulelwa' s.Itr eallyhi tust hatwewer ereal l
ybei ngsepar ate.Hi spar entswel comedmei ntot heir
fami l
y, wef edeachot herourweddi ngcake.Peopl eseemedt obehavi ngf un, Ialsot ri
edt ol ook
l
ikeIwashavi ngf unbecausemymoodsor tofaf fectedYandi sa's.Helookedhappy, genui nely
happyyaziandhewashyperespeci allywhenhewassur r
oundedbyhi sf riends.Ar ound6t he
program wasoversohegotupandt ookmyhand, hehel pedmeup.Thenl edust ot hecar ,his
mot hercamet ousbef orewegoti nt hecar .
Her :Ni r
ight ?
Inodded.
Him:Eweol edi .
Her :Congr atulat i
onsbant wanabam andt hisisforyou.
Shegavehi m anenvel ope.
Him:Thanksmama.
Her :Mom al wayshasi tf i
gur edout .
Hesmi l
edandopenedt hef r ontpassengerseatdoor .
Him:Ngenasi si.
Igoti nandcl osedt henhewentt ot hedr i
ver'sside.Hegotonandst artedt heengi ne.Hel ooked
atmebef or edr ivingof f.
Me:Si yaphi ?
Hegavemet hesameenvel opehi smot hergavehi m, Iopenedi tandt ookoutapapernj e.
Me:Wher ei st his?
Him:I tsaB&B, 10onRugbyl uxur y...oneoft hebest .
Me:Si yokwenzani pha?Shoul dn'twegohome?
Iknewexact l
ywhywehadt ogot her ebutIj ustwasn' tsur eIwant edto, nott onight .Notwhi l
e
therewasst i
llnospar kbet weenus.
Him:I tsf orourhoneymoon, wecanal waysgohomexaungat handi.
Iswal lowedspi tbutsai dnot hing.Hedr oveust ohi shouse, whenwegott her eheaskedmet o
stayint hecarsohewenti nal one.Hecamebackaf teraf ewmi nuteswi th2bags, heputt hem
atthebackseatt hengoti nanddr oveust ot heB&BIguess.Becausewhenwegott her e,he
parkedt hengotof f
.Hecamet omysi deandopenedt hedoor ,hehel pedmeout .Thenaf ter
tookt hebagsandl ockedt hecar .Het ookmyhandi ntohi sandwewal kedi nside,ibintlesana
yoh.Hequi ckl ysor tedsomet hingoutatt her eceptionwhi leIlookedar ound.Iwasamazedby
thebeaut yoft het hepl ace.
Him:Gott hekey, l
etsgo.
Hehel douthi shandf ormebutIdi dn'tt akei t,
Ijustwal kednextt ohimt ooursui te.Whenwe
gott ot hedoorhel ookedatme.Il ookedawayt oavoi deyecont actsoheunl ockedt hedoor .
Him:Wai ther epl ease, yeah?5secondsIpr omi se.
Inoddedsohewenti nal onebutcamebackt omequi ckly.
Him:Iwonthur tyoune?Tr ustme.
Inoddedagai nsohescoopedmei ntohi sar msandcar ri
edmei nsidether oom.Thel i
ght swer e
turnedof f,ther ewer ecandl esl i
kebackathomebutt her ewasawhol elotoft hem sot her oom
wasbr ightandbeaut i
ful .Hecar eful lylaidmeont hebedt henst oodupst raight .Het ookof fhis
bowt ie,followedbyhi ssui tj acket .Igotupandsatupst raight .
Him:Rel axwi llyou?Ij ustwant edt obecomf ort
abl e,didn'tmeant oscar eyou.
Inodded.
Him:Iam sur eyoual sowantt obecomf or t
ableright ?
Me:Iam.
Him:Wel li
fyouwantt ot akeashower , i
bat hroom i sther e.
Hepoi ntedt oanopendoorbutIj ustshookmyhead.
Him:Youdon' twantt ohaveashower ?
Me:Idi dn'tbr inganycl othes.
Hest oodi nf rontofmeandcar essedmycheek, Ifeltlikecr yingyoh.
Him:Whatdoyouneedcl othesf or ?Nocl othesar eal lowedi nt hehoneymoon.
Me:Pl easedon' t.
..
Iremovedhi shand.
Him:Theyar ei nt hatbag, yourmom packedi tforyou.
Me:Okay.
Igotupandwentt ot aket hebag.
Him:Wi l
lyouneedhel p?
Me:No!Not hanks.
Hechuckl edsoIwentt ot hebat hroom.Taki ngof fthedr esswasabi tofahust l
ebecauseI
coul dn'tr eacht hebackoft hedr esst ount i
ei t.Iwal kedoutoft hebat hroom andt ot heroom
slowl y,gat her ingal lmyst r engt ht oaskf orhel p.
Me:Pl easehel pmewi tht hi s.Igavehi m mybacksohecoul dunt iet hedr ess, het ookof fthe
neckl acef irstt henunt iedt hedr ess.Ihel di tsoi twoul dn' tfallthenwentt ot hebat hroom tot ake
i
tof f, whenIwasnakedIgotundert heshower .
.
.
Yandi sa:
Asmywi f ewasbusyi nt hebat hroom Iundr essedsoIwasonl yl eftinmyboxer s.Iopenedt he
bot tl
eofchi lledwi net hatwasi nabucketandpour edi tint het wogl assest hatwer einfrontof
me.Iwentt oputt hem cl osert ot hebedt hent ookt hest r
awber r i
es, cream andchocol at
ecl oser
tot hebedt oo.Eymom wast ur ningmei ntoMrRomant icnow.It ookt wor osesf r
om t hevase
andpeal edt hem, throwi ngt hepet alsont hebed.Iwant edt omakei tspeci al ,fi
rstt i
meorno
fi
rstt imei twasgoi ngt obeourf irstti
me.Whent hewat erst oppedr unni ngIt ookt het wo
glassesandl ookedatt hebat hroom door ,wai tingf ormybeaut ifulbr ide.Shef i
nal l
ywal kedout ,
i
nagown.Whenshesawmest andi ngt her eshef rozeandl ookeddown.
Me:Howwasyourshower ?
Her :Itwasokay, pleasewearsomet hing.
Me:Youhaveneverseenaguynakedbef ore?
Sheshookherheadst il
llooki ngdown.
Me:Okaysor ryIdi dn'tknow. ..Letmet aket hesef oryou, wenabambhaapha.
Shet ookhergl assofwi newhi leIt ookherbagandweddi nggown, Iputt hem down, wor ea
gownt henwentbackt oher .
Her :What '
st hi s?
Me:Wi ne, tryi t.
Her :Idi dandIdon' tli
kei t.
Me:I ttakest imet ogetusedt oi tbutifyoudon' tli
kei twecanor dersomet hi ngel se,
champagnemaybe?Nott hatIam t ryi
ngt ot eachyoual coholoranyt hing. .
.Ij ustwantyout o
relax, Iam nott ryingt ogetyoudr unk. .
...
Her :Itsfine.
Fuck!WhywasImumbl i
ng?Icl osedmyeyesf ort ensecondst henopenedt hem.
Me:Okay. .
.wannasi tdown?
Ipul ledhert owar dst hebed, shehesi tatedbef or ecomi ngwi thme.Isatdownandshef ollowed
myl eadbutl ef tspacebet weenus.Shet ookasi pf rom hergl asssoIdi dt hesame.
Me:Soyouavi rgin?
Fuckdi dIhavet oaskt hat ?Wasn' titquiteobvi ous?Shenoddedandmyhear tjumpedf orj oy.
ThatmeantIwoul dbeherf i
rstandonl ymos!Iwasgoi ngt obet hef irstandver yl astmant o
touchherbeaut ifulbody, thatmademehappy.Shewassavi ngher selfformeaf terall.
Me:Youscar ed?
Sheshookherheadbutshewasn' tconvi nci ng, shel ookedt errifi
ed.Herhandswer eshaking,
shecoul dn' tevenl ookatmef orpi tssake.It ookt hegl assoutofherhandsandgotup.Iwent
toputt hem ont het abl ethenwentbackt obed, Igotoni tandgent lypul ledhert owar dsme.So
nowwewer ebot hont hebed, Iturnedherbodyt of acemydi rect i
on.
Me:Youcanf oldyourl egsi nf rontofyoui fyouwantt o.
Shedi dj ustt hatsoIdi dt hesame, Ipul l
edt hest rawber riesandcr eam.Ipl acedt hem bet ween
ust hent ookone, Idippedi tincr eam andt riedt of eedherbutsheshookherhead.
Me:Pl ease. ..
Sheopenedhermout hkanci nci andbi teoni t,Ibi teont hesameone.Shel ookeddown.Was
sheshyorscar edofme?
Me:Don' tbescar edofmepl ease.
Her :Iam notscar ed.
Me:Youver yconvi nci ng.
Herl ipscur vedoutt hemostbeaut iful smi l
e, t
hisgi rlwassl owlywinningovermyhear twi t
hout
event ryinghar d.Shet ookt hechocol atesandputt hem ont hebed.
Me:Happy18t hbi rthday, Iknowt hiswasn' tyouri dealbi rt
hdaypr esentorpar ty.
Shenoddedandbi t
eont hechocol at e.Il ookedatherl ipsasshechewed, sexy!
Him:CanIki ssyou?
Shel ookedatmeandnoddedsl owl y,It houghtshewasgoi ngtosayno.Ir emovedt he
strawber riesandcr eam f rom t hebedandkneel edi nf rontofher .Icuppedherv- shapedf ace
i
nt omyhandsandmadeherl ookupatme.Shel ookedsooi nnocentandner vous, Itookher
handsandwr appedt hem ar oundmywai stt hencuppedherf aceagain.Andj ustadmi redher
beaut y, shewasmor ebeaut iful wi thoutt hemakeupon.
Me:Youbeaut i
ful .
Shel ookeddownshyl ybutImadeherl ookatmeagai n.
Me:CanI ?
ShenoddedsoImovedi nf ort heki ss, Ibabyki ssedherf irstthensmoochedher .Shedi dn'tkiss
mebackbutIdi dn' tst opt illshedi d, coul dt ellitwasherf i
rsttoo.Shebr okeitsoIsatdown
withherbet weenmyl egs, Ihel dherchi nanddr ewheri nforanot herkiss.Shehesi t
atedbef ore
kissingmeback, Imovedi nf oraFr enchki ssandIt hinkImi ghthavescar edherof fbecause
shebr oket heki ssi mmedi atelyandgotof ft hebed.
Her :CanIsl eep?I tsbeenal ongday.
Me:Wear egoi ngt osl eepbutnotnow.
Her :Now, Iwannasl eepnowpl ease.Iam t i
red.
Me:Wewon' tdoanyt hingi fyoudon' twantt obutcanweatl easttal
k,gett oknoweachot her?
Shehel dt hecol laroft hegown.Ser i
ousl y?Whywasshesoot erri
fi
ed?Iwasn' tgoi ngtohur ther.
Her :Iwantt osl eep.
Iputmyhandsupandgotof ft hebed, shequi cklygotundert hebedcover .
Me:Wi l
lyousl eepunxi bekanj alo?
Shedi dn' tsayanyt hingbuti nst eadgavemeapi l
low.
Me:Whatdoyouwantmet odowi thi t?
Her :Sleep.
Me:Puti tnextt oyou, thebedi sbi genoughf ort hebot hofus.
Shel ookeddownatt hef loor ,wasshe?WasI ?
Me:Youcan' tbeser ious!Ont hef loor ?Me?
Her :I'
llsl ee. ..
Me:Fi ne, I'llsleepont hef loor .
Her :Thankyou.
Igr abbedt hepi llow, shegavemet hebedcovert oo.It hrewt hem ont hef l
oort henwentt ot ake
thebot tl
eofwi ne, Ipour edi tint ot hegl assanddownedi tinonego.Icoul dn'
tbel i
evewhatshe
justaskedofme, onmyweddi ngni ght ?Sl eepont hef loor?Hemar nthiswasnotwhatIhadi n
mi ndear lier .Bekudl alwangam apha.Ipour edanot heranddownedi tt oo,Iputi tdownandwor e
mysui t.WhenIwasdr essedIt ookmykeysandl eftther oom, Iwentout si
det ot hecar .Igoti n,
star t
edt heengi neanddr ovet oMandl a'shouse.
.
Ical l
edhi m whenIwasout sidet hegat e.
Him:Ndoda?
Me:Canyouopenf orme?
Him:Wher e?Ar en' tyousupposedt obewi thyourwi feonahoneymoon?
Me:Honeymoonyamasi mbayi n? !Wi l
lyouopen?
Him:Sur eIam comi ng, thegat eisopen.
Me:Shar p.
Idr oppedt hecal l anddr ovei n, Ipar kedt hengotof f .Thel i
ght scameonsoIwentt othedoor ,
heopenedaf teraf ewseconds.
Him:Andt hen?
Me:Ineedmyl apt opbag, Ilefti ther elastni ght .Ineedt ogetsomewor kdone.
Him:What 'supndoda?Wasn' tsheavi rgin?
Me:Doyout hi nkt hatwoul dmakememad?No!Shef uckenaskedmet osl eepont hef l
oor!I
wascompl et elyf i
newi thnotf uckingherbutt hef l
oor?Erhbr angeke.
Hebur stoutofl aught erandhi sl aughwasannoyi ng,hehadst ylesofscr eami ngnj e.Ipushed
him asideandwenti nsi de,Iwentst raighttohi sroom.
"Areyoubei ngser ious? "
Him:Doyout hinkIwoul dbeher eifIwasn' t?
Itookmybag, hehadaboxofci gar ettesont hedr essingchestsoIt ooki ttoget herwitht he
l
ighter.
Me:I '
llrepl acet hem.
Him:Seemsl ikeyouneedt hem mor eandyouneedsomet hingst r
ong.
Me:Shont wana.
Het ookoutbr andyf rom hi scupboar dandt wogl asses,hepour edushal ff ullglasses.
Him:Leti tgoboy, noneedt obeangr y.
Itookt hegl assanddownedi tinonego.
Me:Fuck! !
Him:Mor e?
Me:Yout r yingt ogetmedr unk?
Hel aughedandgavemeaal r
eadyr olledblunt ,wewentout side.Wewer en'tal l
owedt osmoke
i
ndoor s,hi sf atherwoul df reak.Il it
ei tandt ookt wolongpuf fs.Iexhal edl oudl ythent ook
anotherl ongpuf f,Ilaughed.
Me:It hinkIam f allingf orher .
Him:What ? !
Me:IknowboybutIcan' treallycont rolit
.From t hemomentIl ai
deyedonherphayanaboy,
whenshewal keddownt heai sle.BoyIhaveneverf eltli
kethatforanywoman.
Him:It houghtyousai dyouwoul dn't,youpr omi sednott o!
Me:Iam st upi dain' tI?
Him:Howdoyout hi nkshef eelsaboutyou?
Me:Idon' tknow, shef reakedwhenIki ssedher .
Him:Maybeshewasn' tready?
Me:AndIunder standt hatboy, Iam notevenmadatt hat.Sheaskedmet osl eepont hefloor
kukhonai ki ngsi zebedi nourr oom.Iam notsomesor tofpervert,Irespectwomen.Iwasn' t
goingt otouchherengaf uni.
Him:Eyboyyourl i
fei samess, Itoldyounott ogetmar ri
edbut .
...
Me:Hayif ut sek!
Hel aughed, er rhmyphoner angi nmyhandsoIt ookt hecall
.Itwast heB&Bi nformingme
aboutmyupsetwi fe, yoht hewayshewascr yingont hebackgr ound.Il ef tMandl athereand
rushedbackt ot heguest house, Idrovel ikeamadper sonaphaendl eleni.

05
Yandisa:
Igottot heB&Bt ofi
ndheratt her eceptioncr yi
ng,therewasagent lemantryi
ngtocomforther
butshel ookedr eall
yupset .Butwhywasshecr yi
ng?Iwal kedovertothem.
Me:Phumza. ..
Shelookedatmewi t
hasi gnofr el
ief.Wai t
,didshet hinkIwasn'tcomingback?ThatIwould
l
eaveherher ewhenIknewver ywel lthatshedi dn'
tknowherwaybackhome?Shedi dn'
teven
knowwher ewewer emos.Ipul ledhert omesoIcoul dcomf orther.
Gentl
eman:Yout hehusband?
Theguywasact uall
yamanager .
Me:Yes. .Ijustwentoutf oraf ewmi nutes,Ihadnoi deashewoul dgetupset.
Gentl
eman:Womengetupsetoverl i
ttl
et hi
ngssoIunder stand.
Me:Thankyousi r,
Idon'tknowwhatIwoul dhavedonei fshehadwentoutallal
oneatthi
shour .
Gentl
eman:ThankGodoneoft hesecur i
tyguysnot icedthatshewasn'tokaywhenshewas
l
eavingt hebuilding.
Me:Oht hankthem f orme.
Hesmi ledandnodded.
Gent leman:Enj oyt her estofyourst ay.
Me:Thankyou.Masambe.
Ipul ledherwi thmebutIl etgoassoonasshest artedwal king.
Me:Whatwer eyout hi
nki ng?Uyazaziukubauphi ?Wher ewer eyougoi ng?Whydi dyoul eave
ther oom?
Shewi pedhert ears.
Her :Iwasl -oo-k-i-
n- gf -
fo-foryou.
Me:Why?
Her :Youl ef tme!
Tear sescapedhereyesagai n, yoht hisgirlhadt ear st owast eshame.Andsheandherst upid
tear swer ebegi nningt opi ssmeof f.Wegott oourr oom, Ithrewt hebagont hebedandt ookof f
thej acket .
Me:Whywoul dIleaveyou?
Her :Because. ..be-caus- eIdi dn' t
...
Theki dwassooconvi ncedt hatIwasaj erk, Iwasn' tsur pr isedt houghbecauseIusedt obet hat
j
er kormaybeIwasst il
l t
hatj erk...
Me:No. ..
no!Youshoul dhavest ayedi nher ePhumzamar n!WhatwasIgoi ngtosayt oyour
par ent sifyouhadgonemi ssing? !Ifsomet hinghadhappenedt oyou? !Awundi cingelimar n,
usel fish!
Aaahi twasl ikeIopenedat apoft ear sbecauset heyr anoutofhereyesi mmedi atelyandshe
criedr eall
yhar d.
Me:Whyar eyoucr yingnow?
Her :Youshout ingatme. ..
Howcoul doneper sonbesooemot ional andsensi ti
ve, womanar ereal lysensit i
vecr eat uresI
tel
lyou.
Me:Xol o,comeher e.
Ipul ledhert omeandhuggedher ,br ushingherback.
Me:Iwasn' tgoi ngt ol eaveyouher eal lbyyour self,Iwentt ofet chmybag.Ipr omi seIwas
goingt ocomeback. .
.AndIdi dn' tleavengobayour efusedme.Iwant edt okeepbusybecauseI
coul dn' tsleepont hef loor .AndIam sor ryforshout ing, xol oI'l
lneverdoi tagai n.
ShenoddedsoIbr oket heembr aceandl ookedather .Iwi pedhert ear st henkissedher
forehead.
Me:Xol ovha?Iam sor ry.Shenodded." Got obedkesi si ,I'
llbeher e"
Her :Yi zolalanam, pl ease.
Me:I '
m notgoi ngt ol eaveyouagai n.
Her :Pl easebhut iYandi sa...please. ..
Bhut iYandi sa?Iwascompl etelyf riendzonedapha.
Me:Okay.
Itookherhandandl edhert obed, tuckedheri nandgotont hebedt oo.Shet ookmyhandi nto
herhand, sl i
ppi ngherf inger sbet weenmi net hensnuggl edt hem underherpi l
low.Ishookmy
headbutIdeci dedt oletherbe.
.
WhenIwokeupshewasst illhol dingmyhand, Islowl ypul l
edi toutofherhand.Idi dn'twantt o
wakeherupsoIt riedt obecar eful,IguessIwasn' tcar ef ulenough.Becauseshet ight enedher
griponmyhandandl ookedatme.Isweart hegi r
ldi dn'tsl eepal lnight ,wheneverIt riedt opul l
myhandoutofherhandshewokeupsoIendedupf all
ingasl eepkanj alo.It
hi nkthat 'stheonl y
ti
meshewassur et hatIwasn' tleavi ngher .
Me:Iwontl eave, promi se.
Shesl owlyl oosenedhergr iponmyhandsoIpul ledi toutandgotup.
Me:I '
m sor ryf orscar i
ngyoul astni ght ,
Ishoul dhavebeenmor ecaut ious.Younewi nt heci ty
soseei ngt heonl yper sonyout rustt opr otectyoul eaveyoui nt hemi ddleofnowher eal lal one
musthavebeenal i
ttlescar yf oryou.Iwasal i
ttl
esel f
ishl astni ghtandIwoul dliket oapol ogize
fort hat.
Her :IsitbecauseIcoul dn' t?
Me:No, absol utel ynot .Iwasal i
ttleangr ybecauseyouaskedmet osleepont hef loor .
Her :I'm sor ryi tsj ustt hatIwasn' tcomf ortabl ewi thshar i
ngt hebedwi thyou.
Me:Iwontf orcemysel fonyousogett hati deaoutofyourhead.I fyoudon' twantt o, I'
llrespect
thatokay?
Shenodded.
Her :Thankyouf ort heapol ogy, youf or given.
Me:Shar pkemt wana.
Itookoutaci gar etteandl i
ght erfrom myj ackett henwentt othebal cony.Ilititandt ookapuf f,
therewasnot hingmor er el axingt hanamor ningsmokei nabeaut if
ulplace.Thevi ewl ooked
great ,Iwasdef initelyamor ningper son.Il ovedever ythingabouti t,t
hemor ningbr eeze, seei ng
thesunr i
se, li
st eningt ot hebi rdschi rpandseei ngpeopl eont hemove.Waki ngupnj ewasa
hugebl essi ngandIwasf or evergr at ef ul.Af tersmoki ngIwentbacki nside,Phumzawas
probabl yi nt heshowerbecauseshewasn' tint her oom andwat erwasr unningint hebat hr oom.
Ical l
edr oom ser viceandor deredcof fee, wewer en' tgoi ngt ohavebr eakfasti nthesamepl ace.
Infactwewer echecki ngout .Iwasf or cedt ocutour" honeymoon"shor t,mom hadbookedusa
whol eweeki nt heguest house.ButbecausePhumzawasn' tcomf ort
ablear oundmewehadt o
cuti tshor t, whatwast hepoi ntofst ayi ngt herei ft her ewasnohoneymoon?Whenshecame
outoft hebat hroom Iwenti nt ohaveashower .2mi nut esintomyshowerIwasdi st urbedby
Phumzashout ing.
"Ther eissomeoneatt hedoor ,ndenzenj ani ?"
Me:Lookf orabl ackwal leti nmybag, leIwentt of et chl astni ght .TakeoutR100xai khona, give
i
tt ot heguyt hensendhi m away.
Her :Okay.
Ishower edqui ckl yt hengotout ,
Idr iedmybodyt henwentt ot her oom.If oundPhumzaal l
dressed, thatwasf ast.It ookmycof f eef rom t het abl e,Itookt wosi pst henputi tdownt ol otion
andgetdr essed.Iwor ebl ueguessj eans, abl ackandwhi tepr i
nt edt-shirt
,andwhi teNi keki cks.
Me:Wenotcomi ngbacksopackyourbag.
Her :Iam done, Ij ustwant edt otidyupapha.
Me:Don' t, someonewi llcomei nt ocl ean.
Shenodded.It ookourbagsandwentt ot hedoor ,Iopenedandl etherwal koutf irst.If oll
owed
afterhert ot her ecept i
ont ocheckout .Wewentoutt oourcarke, Il
oadedourbagst henopened
thedoorf orher .Shegoti nandcl osedsoIwentt omysi de.Ist ar t
edt heengi neanddr ovet o
Tabl emount aincaf e, wewer egoi ngt ohavebr eakf astt here.Itwasabeaut i
fulpl aceandi twas
closert ot het abl emount ai n,Iwant edust ogochecki toutl ater...Thenmaybegot ot hebeach
orsomet hing.IwasneverMrr omant icsoIdi dn' tknowal lther omant icplacest ot akeher .
.
Whenwegott ot her estaur antwewer eshownt oat abl esowesatdown.Thewai t
ress
i
nt roducedher sel fasVenol i
at hengaveusbr eakf astmenus.Shegaveusamomentt odeci de
onwhatwewer egoi ngt ohave.I nst eadofl ooki ngatt hemenumywi fejustlookedar ound.
Me:Sowhatdoyouwantt ohave?
Shel ookedatmeandshr uggedhershoul der s, Ismi led.Ther ewassomet hingabouthert hat
mademewantt of al li
nl ovewi thhersobad.
Me:Thepl acei sbeaut iful right?
Her :Kakhul u.
Me:Yeahbutwehavet oeatandi thi?
Her :ButIdon' tknowwhatt ohave, kukhont oni ?
Me:I fyoul ookt hrought hemenuuzobona.
Shepagedt hroughi tbr ief l
yt hencl osedi tandf ol dedherar msi nf r
ontofherchest .Ismi led
anddeci dedonwhatt ohavet hencal ledoverourwai tress.It oldherwhatIwasgoi ngt ohave
thenl ookedatPhumza.
Her :Whathesai d.
Agai nIsmi ledshewasj ustsoocut et hough!Ever ythi
ngabouthernj e.
..God!Shewasheaven
sent .
Her :Yousmi ling?
Me:NaaahIwast hi nki ngnj e.
Her :Mustbesomet hingbeaut iful.
Me:I tist rustme.
Shesmi l
ed, Iswearever ytimeshesmi ledIf el linlovewi t
hher .Shehadabeaut i
fulandcheer ful
smi le.Thewai tressbr oughtourdr inkst oget herwi thourf orks&kni f
es.Ithankedhert hen
l
ookedatPhumza.
Me:Tel lmeaboutyour self,whatmakesyouhappy?Whatyoul ikeanddon' tlike.
Her :Myf ami lymademehappy, mygr adesatschool alsomademehappy.
Me:Theywer egood?
Her :Myt eacher sdi dn'thaveanyt hingbadt osayaboutt hem.
Me:I mpr essive, sowhatdoyouwantt odoaboutyourgr adeswhent heresultsar eout?
Her :Not hing, Iwoul dhavel ovedt ostudyf urthert hough.
Me:Andwhatdi dyouwantt ost udy?
Thewai tressbr oughtourf ood, Itookmyf or
kandkni f
eanddugi nwhi leshecl osedhereyes.
Sheopenedt hem af t
eraf ewseconds.
Her :Wehavet ogi vet hankst ot heLor df orwhatwehave, khonaabanganakho. .
.
SeewhatImeant ?Notonl ywasshebeaut if
ul outsidebuti nsidet oo.
Me:Tr ue, nextt imeI '
lljoinyou.
Shel ookedatmyhandst henar oundt her est aur ant.Shet ookt hef or
kandkni fe.Shet ri
edto
uset hem butf ailed, shet riedacoupl eoft i
mesbutst i
llfailed.Shewasget ti
ngf rustrat
edbya
secondsoIputt hem downandusedmyhands.
Me:Youdon' thavet ouset hem.
Her :Iam sor ry.
Sheputt hem downandwi pedhereyes.
Me:Don' tbe.
Her :IknowIam anembar rassmentandIam sor r
y.
Me:Phumzal ookatme. ..Shel ookedatme." St opbei ngsor ry,youhaveabsol utelynot hi
ngto
besor ryabout .Andyoudef i
ni telynotanembar rassment "
Her :Youj ustsayi ngt hatbutdeepdowni nsi deyouknowt hatIam anembar r
assmentt oyou.
Me:Noyounot ,andyoudon' thavet ocr y.YaboIam eat ingwi thmyhands?Andnoonei s
sayinganyt hing.
Shewi pedhereyesagai nt illtheywer edr y,Ipul l
edherpl atet omeandcutever ythingint
osmal l
pieces.Ihadneverbeenwi thsomeonewhowor ri
edsomuchaboutr epresentingmewel lin
publ ic.
Me:Youcanuseyourf orknow.
Shesmi l
edandt ookt hef ork.
Her :Thankyou.
Me:Mypl easur e.
Aftereat ingIor der edanot herr oundofdr inkst henset t
ledt hebi ll
.Wegotupandwewentsi ght
seeing, sheseemedt obeeasi ngupal i
ttl
ear oundme.Shewasl aughingnowbutt alki
ngwas
stil
lani ssue, butImustsayIl ovedseei ngherl augh.Ievenf oundmysel ftakingpi ctur
esofher
whileshewasn' tl ooki ngt hough, Ididn'twantt ooverwhel m herl ikelastnight.Af t
ersight
seeingwehadl uncht henIdr oveushome.
.
.
Phumza:
Whenwegothome, hepar kedt henwegotof f.Het ookourbagsandwewenti nside.Bothour
fami lieswer eint hel ounget alki ng.Wegr eet edt henwentt odifferentrooms, himt ohisroom
andmet oOl wet hu'sr oom si ncet her ewasnoi secomi ngf r
om t here.If oundt hem ont hebed
tal
king, Bulel waf it
tedi nper f
ectlywi tht hem.Shewashyperandt al
kat i
ve, maybeYandi sa
shouldhavewai tedf orhernotme.
"Sheusedt ocr yever ytimeaboyexcusedherort r
iedtot al
kt oher .
..
",Bul esai dandt hey
l
aughed.Shewasexagger ating,thatwasn' tt r
ue.Gosh!Thi swassooembar r
assi ng.
Me:HahBul elwa.
Theyl ookedatmeandpat tedt hebedsoIwentt ositdown.
Bule:Buti tst ruemt ase.
Me:That '
snothowi tal lplayedout .
Bule:Di dn'tyoucr ywhenboysaskedyouout ?Orhol dont omewhenaguycameal ongand
askedt ot alkt oyou?
Me:Nooo.
Zethu:Ncoooooh.
Bule:Uyabona?Wher edi dt het woofyoudi sappeart oyesterday?Ihopeyoudi dn'tembar rass
yoursel fbycr yingke.
Igavehert hatshutupl ookbutshej ustlaughed.Bul el
waebephaphasomet i
mesbutIst il
lloved
her,Icoul dn'ti magi nemyl ifewi t
houther .Shecompl etedme.
Zethu:Hayi Bul el wazi zintozabobobabi niezo.
Bule:Hayiwet huIwantt oknowwher eyouguyswentyest erday.
Me:TosomeB&Bnj e.
Olwet hu:Honeymoon?
Bule:Hayiwet hut her ewasnohoneymoont her emysi steristerrifi
edofmanandazbamenzani .
Theyl aughed.
Zethu:Bul el wa. ..
Bule:So?
Me:Idi dn'tknowhowt oactar oundhi m, Iknowhei smyhusbandandever ythingbuthest ill
feel
ssomuchl ikeast ranger .Don' tgetmewr onghei sasweetandcar ingguy, heisa
gentleman.Butt her ei snoconnect ionbet weenus.
Olwet hu:Yoh!
Shecl appedonce.WasIsupposedt olovet heguyt hefir
sttimendi mbonana?
Zethu:Gi vei tt ime, itwi llhappennat urall
y.Yandi saissuchagoodguy, Iam sur eyouwi l
lfallin
l
ovewi thhi mi nnot ime.
Me:Idon' tknow. .
.
Olwet hu:Hedoesn' tbi t
e.
Me:Iknow.
Bule:Qha?
Me:Idon' tknowokay?I tsj usthar df ormet oopenupandgetcl oset otheopposi tesexBul elwa,
youknowt hatmos.
Olwet hu:Soyout ryingt osayt herewasnohoneymoonl astnight ?
Me:Dependsonyourdef initionofhoneymoon.
Bule:OhmyGod!Youhusbandandwi fef orGod' ssake!Ther ei snot hingwr ongwi thdoi ngit,
becomi ngone.
Me:Don' tyout hinkIknowt hat ?Buti tdoesn' tmakei tanyeasi er.
Bule:Ther ei snot hingt obescar edofmt ase, yougetusedt odoi ngit.Ther eisnot hi
ngwr ong
withcr eatingabondwi thyourhusband, al lowi nghi mintoyourl ife.Don' tpushhi m away
becauseyou' llr egr eti twhenhef i
ndsanot herwoman.
Zethu:That 'st ruebutt herei snor ush.
Me:Wai tami nut e, ar eyounotst illavi rgin?
Bule:Thi sisnotaboutme.
Me:Doesmom know?Bul el wa...
Bule:Hayiwet hui thappenedr ecent lybesi dest heywi l
lneverf i
ndoutandi t
hit heirperfect
daught erismar riednow?
Me:Iam notper fect.
Bule:Iknowbutal lIwassayi ngi sallowt heguyi nt oyourl ifeneh?Tr yt or elaxar oundhi m.
Me:Idon' tknow, onl yt i
mewi lltell.
Bule:Onest epatat ime, stopbei ngsoohar donhi m.
Inoddedandwecont i
nuedt alkingaboutyest er day, thatwasl i
kethebi ggesthi ghl i
ghtofmyl i
fe.
Itwasj ustsoobeaut ifulandIl ookeddazzl i
ng.
.
Ahourl atermom camei nt ot ellmet ogost artont hepot ssoIgotupandl eftthem there.I
wentt ot heki t
chenandf oundmymot herinl awt akingoutt hei ngr
edi ent sIwasgoi ngtouset o
cookt onight '
ssupper .It hankedhert henst ar tedont hecooki ngwhi leshewentt oj oi
nmy
parentsi nt hel ounge.Iwant edmyf i
rstmealasumakot iwal aphat obet hebestt heyhaveever
tast
edsobendi zimi selengasekuphekeni .
.
Whent hef oodwasr eadyIdi shedupf orever yoneandser vedt hem.Mom camet omei nthe
kit
chenasIwasaboutt oser vet hem dr inks.
Her:Wher ei syourhusband?
Me:Inhi sr oom.
Her:Umhambi seleukut yakesi si.
Me:Okaymama.
Her:ThewayIt aughtyou, I'
llhel pyouwi t
ht hese.
Shet ookt hedr i
nks.SoIt ookhi sf ood, placedi tont het rayt ogetherwi thaspoon, jui
ceandwet
handnapki n.It hent ookt hem t ohi mi nhi sroom, hewassl eepingsoIwokehi m up.
Him:Hmmm?
Me:Yourf oodi sr eady.
Him:Bekaapho.
Me:Itwi l
lgetcol dnj e.
Him:Iwi l
lwar mi tupl at er.
Me:Pl ease. ..
Hemumbl edsomet hingt ohi msel fashesetup, hesmi l
edasIpl acedt het rayonhi sbedsi de.I
gavehi mt hewethandnapki nt owi pehi shandsf irstthenIgavehi m hi sf ood.
Him:Thankyou.
Me:Itsnot hi ng.Doyouneedanyt hingel se?
Him:Hayi thankyou.
Inoddedandl ef thi mt ohavehi smeali npeace.Iwentt oj ointhegirlsi nt heki tchen, t
hat'
s
wheret heywer eeat ing.It ookmypl ateandspoon, t
hensatdown.
Bulelwa:Ubusahambi sleuhubby?
Me:Aveuphaphahl o.
Shelaughed.
Bule:Wel eavi ngt onight .
Myeyesshotopenandt ear si mmedi atelyranoutofmyeyes.Theywer en' tevenher eforlong
buttheywer el eavi ngal r
eady?Comeon!Coul dn' tt heyst ayl onger?Ineededt hem.
Her:Ha. aPhumzadon' tdot hatmt aseuzobar ight .
Isaidnot hi ngbuti nsteadwi pedmyt earsandat ei nsilence.Af t
ereatingIgotupandwentt o
takethedi shesf rom t hel ounge.
Yandisa' sf ather :Thatwasdel iciousmakot i
, thankyou.
Ismiled.
Hismot her :Ohyour aisedherwel l
,mysonwi llbepr operlyt akencar eofher e.Icanseewe
madenomi stake.
AgainIsmi ledandt ookt hedi shest ot heki tchen.Ist artedonwashi ngt hem, asIwasbusy
Yandisawal kedi nwi that rayi nhi shands.Hepl acedi tnextt othedi r
t ydi shes.
Him:Thatwasadel ici
ousmeal ,thankyou.
Me:Hmm. ..
Him:YeOl wet huwhatar eyoudoi ng?
Shewasbusywi thherphoneandchat t
ingwi thBul eandZet hu.Theywer ekeepingme
companywi tht hei rf unnyst or i
es, ther ewasnosi lencewi ththem ar ound.
Her :Not hingr eal ly,whatdoyouwantbhut iwam omhl e?
Hechuckl ed.
Him:Towasht hedi shes, Phumzahl alaphansi .
Her :Hai bobhut iIam nott hemakot iher e,shei s.
Him:Exact ly, shei snotasl ave.Shecookedt hel eastyoucandoi shel pwasht hedi shesand
putt hatphoneaway.
Me:NoI '
llwasht hem qui ckl y, Ihavenopr oblem wi tht hat.
Her :See?Shedoesn' tmi nd.Uyayazii ndawoyakheaphaekhaya.
Bul e:Whatdoyoumeanbyt hat ?
Me:Mt aseyi yeke.
Bul e:Ha. amt asengekeuzokukhwel aenhl okol oul ibelekubanenhl iziyoent l
eapha.
Me:Hayimt ase.
Ididn' twanthert oembar rassmewi thherbi gmout h.Ol wethucoul dt alkfordaysandIdi dn't
wanthert o, shewasl eavi ngt oni ghtandmnaIwoul dbel eftaloneapha.Icoul dn'thaveherr uin
thingsbet weenmeandmysi sters-in-law.Sheputherhandsup.
Me:Thankyou.
Him:Ol wet hul etmenotr epeatmysel f.
Her :Kodwabhut i
..
Him:Kodwabhut inot hing, yiza.
Hepul l
edmyhandsoutoft hewat er ,ri
nsedt hesoapof fthem.Ol wet humumbl edherwayt o
thesi nkt of ini shwhatIst ar ted.
Him:Don' tt oucht hosedi shes.I '
llbeback, Iam goi ngt oMandl a'shouse.
Inoddedsohewal kedoutoft heki tchen.Atl eastIcoul dhaveamomentwi t
hmysi st erbefore
theyl eave.
.
Acoupl eofhour slat er..
.
Thet i
mewasnow9andi twast imef ormypar entst ol eave.Seei ngt hem of fwasn' teasy, I
didn'twantt hem t ol eaveyet .Atl eastwi tht hem ar oundIdi dn'
tf eell i
keIdi dn'tbelongher e, I
wassur roundedbymyl ovedonest ooj ustl i
keuYandi sa.Whoeversai dagi r
lhadt ol eaveher
homef orherhusband' shousewasr eallybei ngunf air.Ithurt
,ithur tsobad.Idi dn'twantt obe
separ at edf rom mypar ent sandsi ster, whycoul dn'tIl i
vewi ththem andst il
lbemar riedtomy
husband?
Mom:RememberwhatIt aughtyoubaby, respectandl oveyourhusband.Takever ygoodcar e
ofhi m, beagooddaught eri nl awt oyouri nlawsandwi fetoyourhusband.I fyouhavea
probl em ukhonaumamakaYandi sa.Shei syourmot hernowsobui ldar elat
ionshipwi thher.
Me:Pl easedon' tleavemebehi ndmama.
Her :Wehavet okal okPhumi e, youbel ongher enow.Wi t
hyourhusbandandhi sfami ly.Thina
wenotyourf ami l
yanymor e, theyar e.
Hear inghersayt hathur tsoIj ustweptkakhul u,shewi pedmyt ear s.
Her :Uyekeukut efa.
Me:I 'mt ryingmama.
Iwi pedmyt ear swi tht hebackofmypal ms.
Bul elwa:Younott ryi nghar denough.
Ilookedatherandhuggedhersot i
ght .
Me:I 'llmi ssyou.
Bul e:I'l
l mi ssyout oomt asebutdon' twor ryIhaveyourhusband' snumber ,I
'l
lcallyouphakuyo
withmom' sphone.
Webr oket heembr ace.
Me:Ever yday?
Bule:Ever ydaymt ase.Shepul ledmet owher eYandi sawas, hewasbackt oseemypar entsof f
.
Bule:Sbar iwam pl easet akever ygoodcar eofmysi ster .
Yandi sa:Iwi l
l.
Bule:Pr omi set oal waysst andupf orher ?Makeherl augh, makeherahotcupofcof f
eewhen
sheisupset .Ithel pst ocal m herdown, don' tshoutatherpl ease.Shei sver ysensi ti
ve.Tal kto
herwhenshei ssad, cheerherup.
Him:Ipr omi se.
Bule:Thankyou.
Theyshookhands, Iwentt osaybyet odad.Hedi dn' thavemucht osaybutt hi s, "r
epr esentus
wellandt akecar eofyour self".Theygoti nt hecarandt hemi nuteitst artedmovi ngIr ani nside
thehouseandt oYandi sa'sr oom.It hr ewmysel font hebedandcr iedmyeyebal lsout .06
Yandi sa:
Istoodt her enotknowi ngwhatt odo, goaf terherorl etherbe?Zet hupushedmesoIwentaf t
er
her,Icoul donl yi magi nehowshewasf eel ing.Ihaveneverbeensepar atedf rom mypar ent sso
Ididn'tknowt hef eeling.If oundheri nmyr oom cr ying, Isatont hebedandbr ushedherback
butsheshookmyhandof f,hayi ke!Il etherbe, Iwasn' tgoi ngt ocomf or tsomeonewhodi dn't
wantmet ocomf or ther .Isatt her ewat chi nghercr yt i
llshef inall
ycal meddown, whenshewas
calm shegotupwi pedherf acet henwal kedoutoft her oom.Igotupt oobutonl yt oundr ess
andgeti nbed, i
twasl ateandIhadanear lymor ning.AsIwaswai tingf ormywi fet ocome
backmyphoner ang, Il ookedatt hecal lerI Dt henpi ckedup.
Me:It houghtyouwant ednot hingt odowi thme.
ThedooropenedandPhumzawal kedi n.
Her:Ij ustcal ledt ocongr atulat eyou, Iwasatyourweddi ng.Isawyourwi feandIt hi
nkyou
couldhavedonebet t
er .
Me:Oh?
Her:Youcan' tt alk?Why?I sshenextt oyou?
Me:Noi tsj ustt hatIdon' tknowwhatyouwantmet osay.Whatwoul dyoul ikemet odowi t
h
theinf ormat ionyouj ustgaveme?
Phumzal ookedatmet hencont i
nueddoi ngwhatshewasdoi ng, shet henwal kedout .
Her:Howdoyoudoi tYandi sa?Howdoyoul i
esoowel l?Howdoyoumar ryanot herwhenwe
weresoohappyt oget her ?Youpl ayedme!
Shesni ffed.
Me:Chant el
lepl ease. ..
Her:NoIwantyout ot ellmehowyoudoi t!Howdoyousl eepatni ghtknowi ngt hatyoubr oke
myhear t?!Youdi dn' tevenhavet hegut st ot ellittomyf ace, Ihadt ofindweddi ngi nvitations!
Whatt ypeofper sonar eyou? !
Me:Chant el
lepl easedon' t.
..Please. ..
Isti
llhadasof tspotf orChant ell
esohear i
nghowupsetshewasbr okemyhear t .Especi ally
knowi ngt hatIbr oughthert hepai n,Iwast her easonshewasupset .
Her:Whatwaswr ongwi thme?
Me:Not hing.Li st endon' teveraskyour sel fthat ,youar ebeaut i
fulandi ntell
igent .Ther ei s
nothingwr ongwi thyou, Ithinkanyguywhowi l
l bewi thyoui slucky.
Her:Thenwhyar en' tyoumar ri
edt ome?Whyar en' tyout hatguy?
Me:BecauseChant elle...BecauseI ,nomyf ather .Ifi twasupt omeIwoul dn' tbemar ried, Iha..
..
Thedooropenedagai nandPhumzawal kedi nwear ingagown.Il ookedatherwonder i
ngi fshe
heardt hatorna?Shel ookedatmef orawhi l
esoIdr oppedt hecal landswi tchedmyphoneof f.
Justt oavoi dunwant edcal ls.
Phumza:CanIt ur nof ft hel i
ght ?
Me:Wi llyousl eepi nt hat ?
Sheshookherheadbutnoddedatt hesamet ime.
Me:Hayiyoucant urnof fthel i
ght ,itsf i
ne.
Ipulledt hebedcoverupt henl aidonmybackasshet urnedt hel i
ghtof fthengoti nbed.She
sleptadi st ancef r om me, givingmeherback.Li ker eal l
y?Ideci dedt opul lhercl osert omeand
kissedherneckt henf l
ippedhert obeonherback.Igotont opofherandki ssedherl ips,but
stoppedwhenIr eal i
sedt hatshewasn' tgoi ngt oki ssmebackanyt imesoon.Il ookedather .
Me:Getof fme.
Whatt hef uck? !Di dshehavet ober ude?ButIgotof fherandshesl eptadi stancef r
om me
agai n.Ial sogavehermybackandt riedsoohar dt of allasleepbutIcoul dn't,noonehasever
reject edmel iket hat !Ihuf fedandsl eptonmyback, howwasIsupposedt oshar eabedwi th
someonewhoseemedt erri
fiedofme?Someonewhodi stancedher sel fsomuchf rom me?Who
coul dn'tt alkt ome!Iwasn' tal lowedt ot ouch?I st hishowt hingswer egoi ngt obebet weenus?I
tur nedandsl eptonmysi de, faci ngher .Shedi dn' tmoveonebi toraskwhatwasbot her i
ngme.
Itur nedagai nt osl eeponmybackt hensi de.
.
Ihavenoi deawhenIf ellasleepl astni ghtbutIr ememberwaki ngupt oanempt ybed, my"wi f
e"
wasn' tbymysi deandIcoul dn' tcar el ess.Ist retchedandyawnedt hengotoutofbed, Ihadt o
beonsi teat9: 30.Iwentt ohaveaqui ckshower ,aft
ershower i
ngIgotoutandwentt omyr oom.
Itst ill
f eltlikemyr oom mos.Il otionedmybodyt henl ookedf orsomet hingt owear .Ideci dedon
blueski nnyj eansandbl ackshi rt
, Iwor et hej eansandvestt henwentt othel aundr yr oom to
i
r onmyshi rt.Iwor eitandbut tonedi tonmywayt omyr oom, t
uckedi tint henwor emyboot s.I
wasgoi ngt obeonsi tethewhol edaysot herewasnoneedt odressup.It ookal loft het hi
ngsI
woul dneedt henwentoutt ot hel ounge, foundPhumzat heremoppi ngt hef loor.
Me:Mor ni ng!Whendi dyouwakeup?
Her :Notsol ongago.
Me:Isee, sowhat '
sf orbreakf astt hismor ning?
Her :Youonyourwayt owor k?
Me:Yeah.
Her :Now?
Hebant u!Whatdi dn'tsheunder stand?
Me:YeahbutIst illhaveaf ewmi nutest ohavebr eakfast .
Her :Iwasgoi ngt oheadt her er i
ghtnow, Iam doneaphavel esopleasegi vemeaf ewmi nutes.
Isi ghed.
Me:Nevermi ndI 'llgetsomet hi ngonmywayt owor k.
Her :I'
m sor rynextt i
meI 'l
lmakesur et hatIwakeupear lierthantoday.
Me:Don' tst ressabouti t,kur i
ght .
Iwal kedoutt omycar ,packedmyst uf fint hebackseatt hengotont hedr i
ver '
sseatanddr ove
towor k.
.
.
Phumza:
Af tercl eani ngt hel oungeIwentt omakebr eakf astf orever yone.Zethuwal kedi nt heki t
chenal l
dr essedupandl ooki ngsmar t .
Her :Mor ning, akusecl ean.
Me:Mor ni ngsi si,I'm maki ngbr eakfast .
Her :I'
mr unni ngl at easi tis,Iwi llgrabsomet hingonmywayt owor k.
If akedasmi le, whywasever yonegr abbi ngsomet hingont heirwayt owor k?Shet ookanappl e
from t hef ruitbasket .
Her :Seeyoul ater.
Me:Haveagoodday.
Shedi dn'tr epl yt ot hat,Iguessshedi dn' thearme.Af teraf ewmi nut esmymot heri nlaw
wal kedi n, shewasst il
linagown.Atl east !
Her :Mor ningbaby.
Me:Mor ni ngma.
Her :Wenzant onina?
Me:Eggsand. ...
Shewal kedovert omeandr emovedt hef ryingpanf rom t hest ove.Shet hr ewever ythingi nthe
binthenboi ledwat eri naket tl
e.Tear si mmedi at elyr andownmycheeks, Icoul dn'tbel ievewhat
j
usthappenedorwhyshedi dwhatshedi d.
Her:Makemeacupofhotchocol ateandt henwasht hosedi shes.
Inoddedandmadeheracupwhi leshei nst ruct edmeonhowt omakei t.Igavei tt oher ,she
sti
rredaf ewt imest hent ookasi p.
Her:Thankyoumybaby, t
hehousel ookscl eanbyt heway.
Me:Ewema.
Iwashedt hedi shesandpackedt hem i nt hei rr ight fulplaces, afterdoi ngsoIwentt omyr oom
bumpi ngi ntomyf at herinl awi nt hepassage.Iqui cklywi pedmyt ear sandgr eeted.
Him:Mor ningmt anam, youl ookupset .
Ishookmyhead.
Me:Ij usthaveat er ribleheadachet atapl easeexcuseme.
Him:Getsomer estuzovukaur i
ght .
Me:Ewet a. .
Igottoourr oom andl ockedt hedoor ,Ikneel eddownandcr i
ed.Thet hi ngt hatIf ear edwoul d
happenaf tert heweddi ngwashappeni ngandi tmademef eellikecr ap.Af teraver ygoodcr yI
gotup, madet hebed, sweptt hef loort henwentt ohaveabat h.Af terbat hi ngIwentbackt oour
room tol ot ionandgetdr essed.Iwor eadr essnj eandsandal s,Ithensati nf r
ontoft hemi rror
tostylemyt wistandputadukeovermyhead.WhenIwasget ti
ngupaknockcamet hrought he
door,Iwentt oopen.I twasYandi sa'smot her .
Her:Aveucl eani le, Isawt hewashi ngout side.Youmakeaver ygoodwi febutyourpr oblem
i
lapha. .
.
Shepoi ntedhereyes.
Her:Yourmot hert ol dmeandIt houghtIshoul dt estyou.Youshoul dn' tcr ywhensomeone
stepsonyourt oes, akaf unekiumakot ionj alo.Andapushoverwi fe, youhavet obest rong.
Don'ttal kback, Ireal lylovedt hewayyouhandl edt heat ti
tudeIgaveyou.Justdon' tbeapush
overot her wi sebazokugi bel aenhl oko, especi al lyuOl wet hu.
Me:Ewema.
Her:Iam sor r
yf ort hr owi ngawayyourf ood, ther ewasabsol utelynot hingwr ongwi thi t
.Come
withmet ot heki tchen.
Inoddedandcl eanedupt hemessIcr eat edt henwentt ot heki tchen.
Her:Uyabonakeaphaekhayaweeatmedi um r areeggs, Sunnysi deup.Theyor kshoul dbewet ,
that'
showyourhusbandl ikeshi seggs.
Sheshowedmehowt omakeaneggt hewayt heyl ikei tandImadet her est ,theycameout
perfect.
Her:Goodgi rl
, nowf rythebacon, cutt het omat oint osl i
ces.Don' tcooki t, uwabekenj eecal eni.
Makebeans, thenor malwayyoucookt hem.Whenever ythingi sr eadydi shusf orus. ..i
tsyour
husband' sf avor itebr eakf ast,hecal l
si tEngl i
shbr eakf ast.Makehi mt hatmaybe3t imesaweek,
andsomet imesmakehi m cer eal.Cheer iosar ehi sf avor i
tebecausehecanal soeatt hem
withoutmi lk, neverl ethi m got owor kwi thanempt yst omach.Heget sver ybusyatwor ksohe
needsapr operst artt ohi sday.
Me:Ewemama.
Her:Ohyes, heal sol ovescheesesoumf akel e.Thi nawedon' teati tsoyest hat '
sal l.
Me:EwemamaIgoti t.
Her:Good, am If orgi venf orwhathappenedear li
er ?
Me:Ewemama, nam Iam sor ryf orbei ngacr ybaby.
Her:Itsokaybaby.I 'l
lleaveyout oitt hen.
Ismi l
edandf inishedwhatIwasdoi ngt hendi shedup.Iwentt oser vet heol diest henwentt o
eatint heki tchen.Af tereat i
ngIwashedt hedi shes, Ol wethuwal kedi nwhi leIwasst il
lbusy.
Shewasst il
linherpyj amasandt het imewasnow11.
Her:Wher ei smybr eakf ast ?
Me:I nthemi cr owave.
Her:Youmadei tormom di d?
Me:Andi thiIam t hemakot iapha?
Her:Shuuukuf undisileubhut ine?
Iwasn' tgoi ngt oanswert hat .Sheopenedt hemi crowaveandt ookherf ood.
Her:Notbad.
Iroll
edmyeyesandputt hedi shesi nthei rr i
ght fulplacest henwentt omyr oom.Igotont he
bedandf ellasl eepi mmedi ately, Ihar dlysl eptyest erdaybecauseofmyhusbandwhowas
tossingandt ur ningal lni ght .Hayikal okIwasn' ti nther ightspacel astni ghtandIwast i
red.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Wewer ei nasmal lof ficeonsi tet alkingoverj uiceandsandwi ches.
Mandl a:Sohowi st hemar r
iagel if
et reat ingyou?Madeanypr ogressyet ?
Me:Whatmar riagel ife?I t
sl i
kewer oommat est hatdon' tevenseeeyet oeye.
Him:Thatbad?
Me:Yep, wesl eptwi t
hourbacksagai nsteachot her ,ourbodi eswer enotal lowedt ot
ouch.She
wokeupat ...Idon' tknowatwhatt i
met hismor ni ngandwentt ocl ean, nobr eakfastf
ormeand
Ihadt oi ronmyownshi rt.Someki ndofwi feIhave, Inevercamet owor konanempt ywhenI
hadnowi fe.Mom madesur eIhadbr eakf astandmycl otheswer eironed.
Him:Youhaveal waysbeenamommy' sboy.Butwhatwer eyout hinkingmar ryi
ngsomeone
youdon' tknow?Shecoul dbeamanf oral lweknow.
Wel aughed.
Me:Shehasboobsndodacomeon.
Him:Tr ansgenderandst illinthepr ocessofchangi ngher selforhi msel f.Whi chiswhyshe
mar r
iedyou, youl oaded.Andshe. ..
Me:...shet hi nksI 'l
lgi vehermoneyf orheroper at i
ons?
Him:That 'st heonl yexpl anat iont oit!Andi tmakessense.
Ilaughedathi sst upidi ty.
Him:Andt hat 'swhyshewontal lowyout ot ouchher ,shei saman!
AgainIl aughed.
Me:Yi yekel eyont wana. .
.Chant ell
ecal ledl astni ght.
Him:And?
Me:Shewasupsetbr obutIt hi nkshewasdr unk.
Him:Iwoul dn' tbesur pr ised.
Me:Why?
Him:Youbr okeherhear tforaman, t
hegi rlneedst odrownhersor rows.
Ilaughed, t
r ustMandl at ot urnever ythi ngt oaj oke.
Me:Youcanneverbeser iousne?
Him:Jongamanl etyourwi febe, i
fshedoesn' twantt ogi veitukhonauChant ell
e.Andshe
wouldgl adlyt akeyouback.
Me:NahIdon' tthinkIwantt odot hat .
Him:Yougay!
Me:Fut sek!
Him:Noser i
ousl yist her esomet hingyouwantt ot ellme?Chant ell
ei shot !Yatshisal
amt ana!
Me:Iwasf ucki nghersoIknow.
Him:Thenwhati syourpr obl em?
Me:Iam mar riedi ncaseyouf orgot .
Him:Noyouar egay!
Ilaughed.
Him:TheboysandIar egoi ngoutf ordr inksl ater .Yougame?
Me:Ourusualspot ?
Him:Sho.
Me:Countmei n.
Him:Huh!Andwi fey?
Me:Nxaf ut
sek!
Hel aughed.
.
.
Phumza:
IwaswokenupbyYandi sa'smot her,shewasshaki ngmeandcal l
ingmyname.
Her:Lunchi sr eady, didn'tyousl eepl astni ght?
Me:Idi dmama, Ijustthoughtsi ncether ewasnot hingt odo. .
Her:Youdon' thavet oexpl ai nyour self,Iwantyout ofeelathome.
Me:Thankyoumama.
Her:Akukhonxaki ,comeeat .
Iwentt othebat hroom f irstt owashmyf aceandr insemymout hthenwentt ot heki t
chen.
Olwethuwast her eeat ingsoIj oinedher .
Mama:WhenyoudoneIwantyout ogetapenandpaper ,ni
noYandi sanizoyashoppi ngwhen
heget sback.Ial r
eadycal l
edhi m sohei sonhi swayback.
Olwethu:Shoppi ngf or?
Mama:Chr i
stmasi sjustar oundt hecor nerandakukhokwant oyokuphekwa, everythingwentto
theweddi ng.
Olwethu:Ohwewi lldoi tlikeal ways.
Mama:You?Hayiyourbr otherhasawi fehewi l
lgowi t
hher .
Istoppedeat i
ngandl ookedatt hem, kant ishewast alkingt ome?Ut hiwherewi llIfi
ndapen
andpaper ?Ijustgother ewoman!
Olwethu:Kodwamamayouknowt hatIal waysgowi thubhut i nje.
Mama:Thatwasbef orehehadawi fe.
Me:Shecangomama, itsf ine.
Mama:Youneedt olear nhowt odoshoppi ngaphaekhayasot hat'
swher eyougoi ng.
Shewal kedoutoft heki tchenl eavinguswi thaskyhi ght ensioni nther oom.Iat efastthengot
upt odot hedishes.
Me:Youcancomewi thus.
Her:VeleIam comi ngwi thyou, Idon'tneedyourper missi on.
Sheputherpl ateandspooni nthesi nkt henwal kedoutt heki tchen.If i
nishedwashi ngthe
dishesandwentt ochangei ntosomet hingel se.Thenwentout si
det obr i
ngthecl othesin.
.
Yandisaar r
ived30mi nut esl ater,maybe.Hef oundmei nourr oom goi ngthrought hedr awer
s,
searchingforapenandpaper .
Him:Whatar eyoul ooki ngf or?
IstoppedwhatIwasdoi ngandl ookedathi m, hewassoodi r
tyngat hihewaspl ayingi nthe
mud.
Me:Whyar eyousoodi rty?
Him:Api pebur statwor kandIhadt oat tendt oi t
,uf unant oni?
Me:Penandpapert owr itet hel ist.
Him:Whatwer eyoudoi ngt hewhol edayngobayougoi ngt owr i
tethel i
stnow?
Me:Looki ngforapenandpaper .
Him:Youwontf indi tther e, hereuset his.
Hegavemehi sphone, ourweddi ngpi cturewashi swal l
paper .Andwel ookedsoogood, i
twas
beautif
ul.
Me:Don' tyouhaveapenandpaperIcan' tuset his,nott hisver sion.
Him:Iam her et ot eachyounj eoryoudon' twantmyhel p?
Istoodnextt ohi m sohecoul dshowmehowt ooper atehi sphone, whenIhadi tal lfigur edoutI
wentt ot hel ounge.Isatnextt ohi smom andshet ol dmewhatweshoul dgetsoIj ot ted
ever ythi ngdown.Af terwr itingever ythingdownIwentbackt oourr oom t ot ellhimt hatIhadt he
l
istsowecoul dgo.Hewal kedi naf termewi that owelwr appedar oundhi swai st,hewasn' t
reallymuscul arbutal i
ttlebuf f
y.Heal sohadt att
oosorahuget at
toot hatf ittedhi swhol el ef
t
arm, star ti
ngf rom hi sshoul der .Thet attoowascool ,Ithoughti twascool .Hesatdownand
tookhi sbodyl ot ion.
Me:Whatar eyougoi ngt owear ?
Him:OhyesI '
llneedyout oi ront hesef orme.
Hegotupandwentt ot hecl oset .Het ookoutbl uer ippedj eans, whiteshi rtandbl ackvest .I
tookt hem andwentt ot hel aundr yr oom t oi ront hem, takingt hedi rtyoneswi thmet oo.Iputt he
dirtyonesi nt hewashi ngbaskett heni r
onedt hecl eanones, whenIwasdoneIt ookt hem t o
him.Hegotdr essedi mmedi atelyandImustsayhel ookedgood, hehadst yle.Heputona
colognet hent ookhi swal letandkeys.
Him:Shal lwe?
Me:I '
ll gogetOl wet hu.
Him:Why?Uyaphi ?
Me:Shesai dyouguysusual lydot heChr ist masgr ocer ytoget her.
Him:Yeahbutandi t
hi ukhonat ohel pmenow?
Me:Shewi llbemadatmeandIdon' twantt hat .
Him:I '
ll talktohersowenar elaxbesi dest hreei sacr owd.
Ifakedasmi le, Ididn' tr eallywantust obeal onengobawehadnot hingt otal kaboutr eal l
y.At
l
eastwi t
hOl wet huwi thushewoul dn' tfocushi sattent iononmesomuch, Igotr eal lyshy
aroundhi m.Anywayhet oldmet ogowai tout side, hegavemet hecarkeyssoIcoul dsi tinside.
Hej oinedmeaf teraf ewmi nut esanddr oveust otheCanalWal kmal l.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Wegotof faf t
erpar kingandwal kedi ntot hemal l
.It oldherwher ewewer egoi ngt odogr ocery
shoppi ngt henwewentt oWool wor ths.Igotat r
olley, gavehermyphonesoshecoul dr ef erus
tot hel ist.Wewentt ot hef oodar eaandwegotal mostever yt hingt hatwasont hel ist, andmor e.
Sinceshewoul dbecooki ngshewant edt oaddaf ewmor et hingsandIcoul dn' tsayno, yeah
thebudgetwast ightespeci allyaf tert heweddi ngbutIcoul dn' tsaynot omywi fe.Af terget ti
ng
ever ythi ngwewentt ot het il
l topay.Thequeuewasl ongsowest oodt heref orcl oset o20
mi nut esi nsi lence, sheonl yanswer edyesornot owhatIaskedherandkeptqui et.Sor eal l
yI
coul dn' tkeept heconver sat i
ongoi ngwi thsomeonel ikethat ,Ievenwi shedt hatOl wet huwas
her et or escuemef rom t hebor edom.Wef inallypai dandwal kedoutt oanot herst or e, pickn
payf orot herst uf fbutbekugcwel esosaj ika.Aswewer ewal kingoutt hest or eIhear dsomeone
screami ngmyname, Ilookedar oundhopi ngi twasj ustmyi magi nationbuti twasn' t.Isawa
groupofgi rlswavi ngatme, ahh!I twasChant elleandherf riends, Iforgothowhypert heywer e.
Andwhywer etheywavi ngatme?Theywal kedovert oust al kingandl aughi ng, att hatmoment
Iwasr eal l
yhopi ngt heywer en' tcomi ngt ous.But ...theyal lhuggedmeonebyone, kissi ngmy
cheek.Al lfouroft hem, Ist oodt her edumbst ruck!WhenChant ell
edumpedmet hi ngsbet ween
uswentsoursoIwassur pr ised, f i
r stitwast hecal lnowt his?Ha- ahwhatt hef uckwasgoi ng
onher e?Whywer et heysoof riendl ynj eal lofasudden?
Nwabi sa: Unj aniwet hu?Yuhawusanqabe!
Ichuckl edandl ookedatt hem, whatwer et hesegi rlsupt onow?
Chant el l
e: Shoppi ngf orChr i
st mas?
Me:I sn' titqui t
eobvi ous?
Ilookedatherandshel ookedr eal l
ygood.Li keshewasshowi ngmewhatIwasmi ssi ngon
but .
.Ihadmywi feandIhadt of ocusal lmyat tentiononher .
Nwabi sa: Wontyoui nt roduceust oyourwi fe?
Me:Oht hisisPhumzaandPhumi t
hisisLuleka, Nwabi sa, Thembi saand. .
.Chant el
le.
Chant elle:Hisf riends.
Ilookedatherl ikeWTF? !Wewer ef r
iendsnow?
Phumza:Okaypl easedt omeetyou.
Chant elle:Pleasedt omeetyout oo, youguysl ookedbeaut if
ul onyourweddi ngday.Especi all
y
you, thatdr essgi r
l.Andt hemakeup, Yandi
echoosewel l.
Phumzasmi led.
Phumza:Thankyou.
Chant elle:Weshoul dpr obabl yhangoutsomet i
me, anyf riendofYandi sai
saf ri
endofmi ne.He
hasmynumber ,callme.
Ichuckl edbutoutofdi sbel i
ef,whatwasChant ell
epl ayingat ?
Phumza:I '
l
ldoso.
Chant elle:Okayt henenj oyyourshoppi ng.
Shehuggedhert henki ssedmycheek.
Chant elle:Letsgogi rl
s.
Ichuckl edandl ookedatherasshewal kedaway, ohChant elle!Whatthehel lareyouupt o?
Phumza:Sheseemsl ikeani cegi rl
.
Me:Ni ce?Huh!Masi hambe.
Phumza:What ?Isn'tshe?
Ishookmyheadandpushedt hetroll
ey.Shef oll
owedaf termet othepar ki
ngl otandt oourcar .
Iunl ockedt henpackedt hepl asti
csi ntheboot ,afterdoi ngsoIgoti nt hecar.Ist ar
tedthe
engi neandl ookedather ,sheshr uggedandIshr uggedt oo.Shesmi ledandl ookedaway, Iwas
maki ngherbl ushhuh?LolIwasget ti
ngsomewher e.
.
Whenwegothomeweof floadedever ythi
ngweboughtandt ookthepl ast
icsinside,Iasked
Olwet hut ohel pust aket hepl asticsin.Shewasst i
llmadatmebutwhenIgaveheraboxofher
favor itechocol atesshesmi ledandhuggedmel ol.Af tertaki ngeverythinginIt ookanappl eand
washedi t
,Itookabi te.
Me:Phumi e
Shel ookedatme.
Me:Iam goi ngoutf ordr inkswi ththeboysabi tlater .
Her :Okay.
Shecont i
nuedunpacki ngandpacki ngthegr oceriesi ntot hecupboar ds.
Me:Okay?
Her :Yeah, sur e.
Me:Thankyou, ndizohambangokune?
Her :Enj oy.
Ikissedhercheekt henwentoutt omycar ,
Igotonanddr ovet oMandl a'splace.Wewer egoi ng
todr ivet ot hecl ubt oget her .

07
Rightafterpacki
ngt hegr oceri
esawayIst artedcooking,t
hetimewas6:05.Andbecausei twas
al
readyl atemamaadvi sedmet ocooksomet hingsimplesoat7:45thefoodwasr eadyandI
wasdi shingup.Iservedever yoneint hel
ounget henputokwaYandisaint hemicrowaveincase
hecamebackhungr y.AfterthatItookmypl ateandwentt ojoint
hefamily,Isatdownnextto
Zethuandat e.
Tata:I
sYandi sawor kinglate?
Mama:Hayihecamebackear lybayoshopishanomakot i,It
hinkhewentout .Makoti?
Me:Ma?
Her:Didhet el
lyouwher ehewasgoi ng?
Me:Ewemama, hesai dhewasgoi ngoutwi t
hf ri
ends.
Her:Okayhei spr obablyonhi swaybackngoku.
Inoddedandf i
nishedeat i
ng.Af t
erthatIt
ookt hedishestothekit
chenandst artedwashing
them i mmedi at ely, Zet hucamei nt ohel pme.Shewasr insinganddr ying,maki ngsmal ltalknje.
Shewast ellingmeaboutherdayatwor k,shewor kedatt hebankast hequer i
esconsul tant.So
shehadal ltypesofst oriest otel lmeandt heywer ef unny.Wef inishedwashi ngt hedishesat
somet hingt o9, Iwentt ohaveabat handgetr eadyf orbed.Yandi sawasst i
llnotbackandhi s
parent swer ear gui ngabouti t/himi nthel ounge.Ihear dt hem asIgotoutoft hebat hroom.
"Ihavebeenpat ientwi tht hatboybuthewontchange!Phezol ookuhecamebackenukaphu
becauseofweedandal cohol ,umt wanawabant uut hi ni?Heneedst ost opthismamakhe"
"I'
l
ltalkt ohi mt at akhebutyouknowoursoni snotl iket hat ,yil
entoyamaf est i
ve"
"Yeyheneedst oknowt hatyonkel entoyamaf estivei snotf orhi m anymor e,hei sahusband
now! "
"Buthei sal soyoung, butIwi lltalkt ohim"
"Whileyoudot het al kingIwi lldot hepuni shing.Ol wet hugol ockt hatgat e,ifhewant st ostay
outtilllatet henheshoul d.Buthewontdi sturboursl eep, nooneshoul dopenf orhim"
"Wher ewi llhesl eep? "
"Idon' tknow!Butwhoeveropensf orhim wi l
lhavemet odealwi th",Yoh!Ihear df ootsteps
comi ngt owar dst hepassagesoIwentt omyr oom, Igoti nandcl osedt hedoor .Myf atherin
l
awsoundedl ikeast ri
ctmanbuthewasr ightabouthi m smel li
ngofal coholandweed.Onour
weddi ngni ghtandl astni ght ,ebengamsukel ituh.Andt osomeonewhodi dn'tsmokenordr ink,
thesmel li sn' tpl easantatal l.AnywayIwor eani ghtdr ess, switchedof fthel i
ghtt hengoti nbed.
.
Iwaswokenupbycont i
nuesknocksont hewi ndowandsomeonewhi speri
ngmyname, it
soundedl ikeYandi sa.Igotoutofbedandswi tchedt hel i
ght sont henwentt othewi ndow, it
wasr eallyhi m.Iopenedt hewi ndow.
Him:Pl easeopent hedoor .
Me:Got ot hebackdoor ,I'
llbet her e.
Iclosedt hewi ndowt henwor eagownandopenedmybedr oom doorasqui etlyasIcoul d,I
didn'twantt odi stur bmyf at heri nl aw.ThenIwentt ot heki tchen, thedoorwasl essnoi sybutI
sti
llhadt obecar eful .Iopenedandhewal kedi n, Ilockedagai n.
Me:Ar eyouhungr y?
Him:No, sor ryf orwaki ngyouup.
Wewer ebot hwhi sper ing.
Me:Whatt imei si t
?
Him:Justaf ter5.
Me:Let sgot obed.
Wewentt oourr oom.Iwal kedi nf irstandhewal kedi naf terme, l
ocki ngthedoorbehi ndhi m.I
tookof fthegownandgoti nbed, heundr essedaswel lthengoti nbed.Hewasi nhisboxer s
qha.
Me:Youf or gott ot ur nt hel ightsof f.
Hequi cklygotoutofbedandt ur nedt hel ightof fthengoti nbed, al i
ttl
ecl osert ome.Hedi dn't
smel lofweedt hist ime, justal coholandi twasn' tthatbad.
Him:Ij ustwantt ohol dyour i
ght ?Pl ease...
Hepul ledmecl osert ohi m andhel dmet i
ghtt henki ssedt hebackofmyneck.
Me:Howdi dyougeti n?
Him:Ij umpedovert hegat e,whol ockedmeout ?
Me:Ol wet hubutbecausedadt oldhert o.
Him:Washeangr y?
Me:Hedi dn' tlookangr y.
Him:Okay, ar eyouangr yatme?
Me:Nonotr eal lybutIwantt oknow, i
st histher ealyou?Youdr inkandpar tyever yday?
Him:Youhaveapr obl em wi t hit?Nott hatIdoi tever yday, Idon' tdrinkever yday.I nf actIdon' t
l
ikeal coholbutIdosmokeweed.
Me:No.
Him:I st hatyourhonestanswer ?
Me:Nobut. ..
Him:Lookatme.
Iturnedt of acehi m.
Him:Nowyoucant alk.
Me:Let stalkl ater,getsomesl eep.
Him:Wakemeupat7.
Hebabyki ssedmet henf el
lasl eepi mmedi atelyafterthat ,hewasevensnor i
ngkeshame.
.
Icoul dn'tsleepaf terhewokemeup, whent heclockst ri
ked7Iwokehi m up.Hegotoutofbed
i
mmedi ately,tookoutcl othesf ori roningt henwentt ohaveashower .Whilehewentt oshowerI
i
ronedhi sout f i
tfort heday.Af terironi ngIwentt omakehi m hisfavor i
tebreakfastthenserved
himi nourr oom, hewasget ti
ngdr essed.
Me:Hl alaphansi andeat .
HesatdownsoIgavehi m ahandnapki nf irst,hewi pedhi shandst hengavei ttomeandIgave
him hi sfood.
Him:Myf avor it
e, thankyounkosi kaziwam omhl ebutIam notf eeli
ngwel lthismor ni
ngsocel a
undibekel evha?
Hel ookedt ir
ed, hedi dn' tsleepkal okl omt u.It ookt heplat e.
Me:Whatwi llyoueatkengobayoucan' tgot owor konanempt ystomach?
Him:Twosl i
cesofbr ownbr eadandagl assofmi l
k,don'tputanybr eadspr eadne?
Me:Youhungover ?
Him:Youhavenoi dea.
Hel aidonhi sback.
Me:Sor ry,I'
llbringyout hatgl assofmi l
k.
Him:Idi dthist omysel f ,thankyou.
Me:I tisnot hing, ndi yeza.
Iwentt otheki t
chenandgothi m whathewant edthenwentt ohi mf uthi
.Ifoundhi mi nthe
sameposi ti
on, hewasf latout .Ishookhi m awake, hesatupandat eonlyonesl iceofbread.
Him:Thankyou.
Me:I tsmydut yt ot akecar eofyou.
Hesmi l
edt hengotup, shamehewasexhaust edman.
Me:Whydon' tyousl eep?
Him:AyIhavet ogot owor k.
Inoddedt henl efthi mt ogetdr essed.
.
.
Yandi sa:
WhenIwasal lsetf orwor kItookmybag, carkeysandphonet henwentoutt othelounge.
"YeZizicanIhaveawor dwi thyou? "
Me:Sur ebuti twi l
lhavet obequi ckt ata.
Him:Out side.
Inoddedandopenedt hedoor .Iwal kedoutf i
rstanddadf oll
owedaf t
erme.
Him:Howwi llyoudr ivei nyourst ate?
Me:Eyt ataIf loppedey.
Him:YeahandIt hi nkyoushoul dgobackt obed, clearl
yt heal coholi snotoutofyoursyst em.
Me:HayiIwi l
lbeokayt at a,si
yaval atodaysondi zobar i
ght .
Him:Younotgoi ngt obeokay, youcamei nat6.Ihear dyouandyourwi f
eni vul
elana.You
didn'tsleepanduphuzi l
eYandi sa.
Hepul l
edmet ot hever andaandwesatdown.
Me:I twasat5t ata, don' tbemadather .
Him:Uhl eli
phial lt hist ime?Wi thwho?
Me:Hahut at aIam notachi ldanymor e.
Him:Thenst opact i
ngl ikeone!It hinki tstimef oryout ol eavet henestnownyana.
Me:Youki ckingmeoutaf terlocki ngmeout ?Ihadt ojumpovert hegat etata.
Him:Ser vesyour ight!Youar emar ri
edYandi sabehavel ikeamar r
iedman.ButIam notki cking
youout .
Me:Thenwhat ?Yout ellingmet omoveoutr i
ght?
Him:I tst i
mef oryout ogr owupandbeamanbutyouwontunt ilyoumoveout ,
youhaveawi fe
now.Youcan' tbecomi nghomei nt hemor ningunukaal lthesubst ancesyouuse, weedand
alcohol .It
snott hef irstt i
mendi kuva, youdi di twhenyouri nlawswer eher eandIkeptqui et .
Youdi di tagai nl astni ghtorshoul dIsayt hismor ning?Al lIam sayi ngZi zii st hati t'
st i
mef or
yout ochangeyourbachel orhabi ts, leavet hef estivepar tyingt ot hosewhoar est illbachel ors.
Youneedt ost opYandi sa.Umt wanawabant ul onaul alakanj aninaweunukai nt sangu?I t s
disrespect f ult oher , shedoesn' tsmoke.Zi ziyouj ustgotmar riedbutyouar enotspendi ng
enought imewi thyourwi fe, it
sl i
keyoudon' tcar eabouther .
Inodded, maybehewasr i
ght .
Him:Gi vehert hesameamountofr espectshegi vest oyouandmor e.
Me:Ewet at a.
Him:Ihopeyounotonl ylist eningf ort hesakeofi t,Ihopeyouunder standandyouar egoi ngt o
uset headvi cegi vent oyou.
Me:YesdadIshoul dgoi nsi de, looksl i
keIam notgoi ngt owor kanymor e.
Him:Yandi sa. .
.
Me:Tat a?
Him:Yourmot hert ellsmet hatyouhaven' tbr oughtbackt hewhi tesheet .
Me:Thewhi tesh. .
.oheyt ata
Iscratchedmyhead, Icompl etel yf or gott hatt her ewasawhi tesheetmna.
Him:Shewasn' ta. .
..?
Me:Not ata, noshehasbeenr efusi ngmesowehaven' t.
Him:Idon' tbl ameher .
Me:Hayi ket at aandazi .
Him:Ni yazit hatyouhavet odot hisr i
ght ?Weneedpr ooft hatshei swhatt heysai dshei s,
whichi swhyweneedt hatr edst ainont hatsheet .
Me:Hayit at ayouandyourt radi tion.Ndi yat humwangoku, thisshoul dbebet weenmeandher
only.Itsnotf ort hewhol ef ami ly.
Him:YeZi zit hi swassupposedt obeyourf irstst ep, thent het woofyoucoul dhaveat raditional
foll
owedbyl oesi qal engawo.Butever ythingi shappeni ngi nr ever seaphakuni .
Me:Andi fshei sn't?Wi llyout ellmet odi vor ceher ?
Him:Thatwi llbeupt oyouZi zit hi nawej ustwantt oknowukubaebezi phet hekahl enabef ore
goingi ntomar riage, wedon' twantanysur priseskut hikant ishehasachi ldthatwedon' tknow.
Wear esayi nggett oknoweachot her .Thenwhenever ythingi scl eart ousyourgr andmot her
andt heMaj ol a'scanst artt heweddi ngpr epar ationskwel acal a.Kal okZi zi t
heMaj olasal so
wantpeopl et oknowt hatt hei rdaught eri smar ri
edsot heyneedt hist radi ti
onalweddi ng.
Me:I fther ei snor edst ain?
Him:Yourwi fewi l
lbef i
nedl ankomokamamakal okbutwewi l
lpr oceedwi tht hepr epar ations
forthet radi tionalweddi ng, ayokwamkel waasumakot iphakwamakhul uwakho.Shehast obe
i
nt r
oducedt ot hewhol ef ami l
y, azi wenasel al i
niukubangowakhobangat hathiamachance
whent heyseeherwal kingal one.Wej ustneedyourgoahead.
Me:Andt hat '
sanot hermoneyf ut hi?
Him:Howcanwehaveat radi tionalweddi ngwi t
houtmeat ?Andt radi ti
onalbeer ?Wewi l
lneed
toslaught ert wocows, inviteever yone.Si yobhi yoza, si yibethekuseekuseni .( Ichuckl ed,I
couldn' timagi nemyf atherdanci ng)Kal okZi zipeopl eneedt oknowt hatwer ai sedyou
ngendl elaeyi yo, youknowyourcul tur e.Youcan' tlivebyt heWest er nwaysonl y.
Me:Andwheni st hatmeantt ohappen?Umt uuzobabr okeapha, yout elli
ngmet omoveout .
Ufunai t r
adi tionalweddi ng.Al ltheset hingscostmoneyandIam br okeasi tis.
Him:Theyhavet obedone, youandyourwi fecandeci deont heweddi ngdat e.Assoonasyou
havemoney, Iwi llmeetyouhaveway.Youdon' thavet odoever ythingbyyour self, t
hef ami ly
willhelpyou.
Me:AndaziI 'lltal ktoPhumzaabouti t,ifshewant st hist raditionalweddi ngsi zoyenzabuti fshe
doesn' tasi yenzi .
Him:That 'snothowwedot hingsi nt hisf ami ly,shehast obei ntroducedt othewhol efami ly
andt hisi st her i
ghtwayt ogoabouti t.
Me:Okayt at a, ndi zothet hanayekodwa.
Him:Good.
Me:Andpl easet el lumamat ochanget hesheet sf orus, i
nf actchanget hebedcover sand
curtains.Whi teandl imef ort hebed, andl i
mecur t
ai ns.
Hesmi l
ed.
Him:Yenke, Iwi lltellher .
Me:Andbookyour sel vesi ntoahot el,
nonke.I twillbeonme, Ijustwantt obewi thmywi fe.
Him:Ungal imaziumt wanake.
Ilaughed.
Me:Hai bot ata.
Him:Don' tforceheri nt oit,i
fshedoesn' twantt oumyeke.Wedon' twantyoui njailf
orrape.
Me:Iwontt ata, Ipr omi se.Ir espectwomen.
Him:Goodbutyouknowwhatyoushoul ddo?Ubet heiqandakuvel ekuhl
aleisisu,ungadl
al iwe
wantgr andchi ldren.
Ilaughed, eymyf athert hough!Classic!
Me:Si hlalet ata?
Him:Ngqo!Ki lltwobi rdswi thonest one, chof oiqanda.Ahl utheumakot i.
Weshar edal augh, myol dwaski l
li
ngme.
Me:Hayit at aIwi l
ltry.
Him:Tr y?Iscor edont hef i
rstnight,25year sagoandyouar epr oofofthat.
Me:Okayt atat oomuchi nf
o.
Hel aughed.
Him:Godr inkal otofwat erkenyanaandgett heal coholoutofyoursyst em.
Me:I '
lldosot at at hankyouf orthetalk.
Whenwast hel astt imewespokel i
ket hat ?Weevenl aughedl ikethat?Itsbeenyear swithouta
decentconver sat i
onbet weenussoIwashappywehadt hist alk.
Him:Nopr oblem, leaveyourcarkeys.I 'lldriveitinf oryou.
Igavehi mt hekeyst henwentbacki nside, start
ingatt hekitchenkuqal aforabot t
leofwat er.I
tooka2l itr
ebot tleandwentt oZethu'sr oom si nceIcoul dn'tsleepi nmyr oom.

08
Yandisa:
WhenIwokeupi twasar ound4soIgotof fthebedandwentt ot hebat hroom topee.After
peeingIf lushedt henundr essedandgotundert heshower ,Iwant edt owashof fallt
hatsweat .
Aftershower i
ngIwentt omyr oom, i
twasl ooki ngbr i
ghtandbeaut i
ful.IknewIcoul dtr
ustthe
oledi,shedi dawonder ful j
ob.AnywayIl otionedmybodyt hengotdr essedi ngreyNikeshorts
andgr eyvest .Il ookedf orpushi nsandwor et hem thenwentt ot heki tchent omakesomet hi
ng
toeat, Iwashungr y.
Mama:Udewavuka?
Me:Eweol ediyoh!
Her:What '
swr ong?
Shef eltmyt emper at ure, l
iker eall
ymama?Ir emovedherhandf rom myf orehead.
Me:Hehumama, Iam hungr yqha.
Iopenedt hef r
idgeandt ookoutabot tl
eofwat er ,
Idrankf r
om itthenputi tback.
Her:Hayihayi Yandi sa!
Ilaughed.
Me:Sor rymamam omhl e.
Her:Usi lewena, hlalaphansiIwi l
lfi
xyousomet hingtoeat.
Isatdownont heki t
chenhi ghchai randlookedar ound.Wher ewasever yone?Ormywi f
ei n
parti
cul ar.
Me:Wher eismywi f
e?
Her:Yourwi fe?Yuhamabhongo.
Ichuckl ed.
Me:Yeahyeah, souphi ?
Her:Shewentoutwi thOl wet hu.
Me:Bayephi ?
Her:Town, theymeet ingZet hut ogetthethingsyoul eftoutont hatlist.
Me:Ohwhydi dn' tanyonet ellme?Whydi dn'tyouwakemeup, Icouldhavedr ovethem there
mos.
Her:Zi khonai t
axiwet hu.
Me:HayimamaIdon' twanthert ot akepubl ict ranspor tndi khona, nextt i
mewakemeup.
Shenoddedwi thasmi l
eonherf ace, itwasn' tanysmi le.Itwast he" Itoldyouyouwoul df allin
l
ovewi thher "smi le.ButIdeci dednott ogoi ntot hatconver sat i
on.
Me:Whenwi lltheybeback?
Her :Youwi llhavet of etcht hem si nceyouawake, I
'llcallZet huandt ellhert ocal lyouwhen
theyar edone.
Me:Nopr obl em.Soi sicel osam ni thiningaso?
Shehandedmeabowl ,
shemademef ruitsalad.Shegavemeaf orkaswel l
.
Her :Whenyourf athercomesbackf rom wor ksi zohambabutyoursi sterswi l
lstay.
Sheopenedt hef ridgeandt ookoutul t
ra-Mel .Myf avor it
e.
Me:Nopr obl em, t
hankyouf orfixingupmyr oom.
Shegavei ttome.
Her :That 'swhatmot her sar ef or,yi dlakendoda.
Sheki ssedmyf oreheadt henwal kedoutoft heki tchen.Ismi l
ed, mymot hert hough
#Lovest ruck.Il ovet hatwoman.If inishedeat i
ngt henpour edul tramelanddugi n.Af tereat i
ngI
putt hebowl int hesi nkt henwentt ositi nfrontoft het v,IjustopenedMt vbaseandpr etended
tobewat chi ng.Themusi cwasbor i
ng, wel lIwasbor edsoIdeci dedt ologont of acebookj ust
topassbyt ime.Ihadaf ri
endr equestf rom Bul elwaMaj ola, mysi sterinl aw.Iaccept edi tand
shei nboxedmei mmedi ately.
"thankyouf oraccept ing"
"nopr obl em, yout ravel l
edsaf ely? "
"yeaht hanksf oraski ng, i
smysi st ernextt oyou? "
"nope, shei si nt ownwi thmysi ster s"
"okay, sowecant alk? "
"sur eIdon' tseeapr obl em"
Wechat tedf orawhi l
ej ustget ti
ngt oknoweachot her ,shedi dn'tseem i nt erestedi nknowi ng
howhersi sterwasdoi ng.Shewasmor ei nterest edi nknowi ngme, askingsomeper sonal
quest i
ons.Whi chIwasr eluctantt oanswer i
ng.Shet ol
dmest uffabouther self.Sheseemed
coolandopencompar edt oherol dersi ster,shecoul dkeepaconver sationgoi ng.Anywayat
6:30Zet hucal ledt ellingmet ofet cht hem soIt ookmykeysandwentout ,lockingt hedoor
behi ndme.Mom anddadwer eont heirwayt othehot elsot herewasnoonehome.
.
Igott ot hemal landpar kedt hencal l
edZet hut ellinghert ogett akeaways, itwast ool atef or
them t ocook.Besi zodl aebsukukal ok.
Her :Wehbhut iIusedal lthemoneyIhadwi thme.
Me:Okayni phi ?I '
l
l comet oyou.
Her :St il
li npi cknpay, wear eaboutt opayt hough.
Me:Al r i
ght .
Idr oppedt hecal landgotof f,Iwentt opi cknpaykuqal atocheckhowf art heywer e.WhenIgot
ther e,theywer ewal kingoutsowewentt ogett akeawayst oget her.Wewentt ospurf ort heir
famousr ibsandwi ngst henIdr oveushome.
.
WhenwegothomeIpar kedt henwegotof f.Weof floadedandt ookt hegr oceriesi n.Af ter
maki ngsur et hatever ythi ngwasi nIwentt osi tinf rontoft het vandt unedi ntochannel203.
Zet hu:Wher ei smom anddad?
Shewaswal ki ngoutoft heki tchen.
Me:Theydeci dedt ospoi l t
hemsel ves, bayeehot ela.
Ol wet hu:Hambamadal a!
Shesatdownont hecouch.
Zet hu:Theyar egoi ngt or evivet hei rlove.
Me:Hayif ut sekt hat 'sdi sgust ing.
Theyl aughed.
Ol wet hu:Hehubhut i
,t heyhuman.
Me:Whatdoyouknow?
Shef oldedherar msi nf rontofherchest .
Ol wet hu:Hayiwet huIam yourwi fe'sage, whatdoessheknow?
Me:Speaki ngofher ,uphi ?
Olwet hu:Wel ef theratt hemal l.
Againt heyl aughed.
Me:Hahahaver yf unnyOl wet hu.
Igotupandwentt ot heki tchen, shewasbusyunpacki ng.Thi skidwasf oreverbusyi nt hi
s
houseshame.
Me:Needahand?
Shel ookedatme.
Her:Al mostdone, didyoueat ?Ar eyouhungr y?
Me:I '
m nothungr yr elax.
Ihelpedherunpackt her estoft hest uf fcreati
ngconver sati
onher eandt here,Itoldherabout
hersisterandshewashappyt oheart hatherpar entsgothomesaf ely.Anywayaf terunpacking
Idishedupf ort hebot hofus.
Me:Si nceyoual waysser vingme, sitdownpl ease.
Shesatdown.
Me:Toni ghti syourspeci al night ,Idon' tusual l
ydot his.
Igaveherherpl at eandgl assofj uice.Shel aughed.
Her:Yout alkingasi fyoucooked.
Me:Iwoul dcookyouaver yspeci almeali fIcoul dbutunf ortunatelyIcan't,thi
si sallIcando.
Isatdownacr ossher .
Her:Theyal wayssayi t
st het houghtt hatcount s.
Me:Andwhatdoyousay?
Her:Ifitcomesf rom aspeci alpl acet heni tsenough.
Me:Sur eitcomesf rom aspeci alpl ace.
Shel ookeddownshyl y.
Me:Phumzapl easel ookatme.
Sheshookherhead.
Me:Pl ease...( shel ookedatme)Il oveyou, Ifelli
nl ovewi t
hyout hemomentIl ai
dmyeyeson
youphai nchur ch.Iwantar ealmar r
iagel if
ewi thyouf il
ledwi thlove, t
rustandhonest y.I'
l
l
under standi fyou. .
.
Her:Iwantt hatt oo.
Itookherhandandki ssedi t,shesmi led.Iwasn' texpect i
ngt hatatall,especiall
ysi nceshewas
sooshyar oundme.Idi dn'tt hinkshewoul dopenupt omel iket hat.
Me:AndIam sor ryaboutt hismor ning, t
hest ateIwasi n.
Her:I'l
lforgiveyoui nonecondi tion, youneverdoi tagai n.
Me:Ipr omi semyl ove.
Shesmi led.
Her:Thenyouf or given.
Me:SocanIki ssmywi fe?
Her:Ha. a
Me:Awucomeon.
Igotupandl eanedoverf oraki ss, shebabyki ssedme.Il aughed.
Her:Whyar eyoul aughi ng?
Me:Becauseyousoocut eandshy.
Her:I'm notshy.
Me:Thenpr ovei t,givemear ealki ss.
Shel ookeddownagai nsoIki ssedherf oreheadt henmadeherl ookatmeandki ssedherl i
ps.
Sheonl yr espondedwhenIwasaboutt obr eaki t
.
"Ohgetar oom yout wo!",Il aughedandbr oketheki ss.
Me:Whatdoyouwantvel e?
Olwet hu:Thi si st heki tchenbhut iiroom yenui l
e.
Me:WenaOl wet huuyaphapha.
Shel aughed.
Olwet hu:Iwasonl yj oking, I'l
ljustt akemyf oodandl eaveyout wol ovebi r
dst oloveeachot her
.
Justdon' tdoanyt hi ngIwoul dn' tdoi nmom' ski t
chen.
Me:Si esmanOl wet hu!Youcor ruptman!
Shel aughedandt ookhert akeawayt henwal kedout .Il ookedatPhumza, sheshr ugged.
Me:Not hi ng.
Shenoddedandwecont inuedeat i
ng.
.
Aftereat ingIof feredt owasht hepl atessoshewentt oj oi nhersi stersi nthel ounge.Af ter
washi ngt hedi shesIwentt ojoi nt hem, theywer ewat chi ngsomebor ingdocument ar y.Isay
bor ingbecauseIdon' twat chdocument aries.
Me:I sn'tt her enot hingbet tert owat chei therthanwhatyouguysar ewat ching?
Them:Nope.
Me:I phii remot e?
Zet hupassedi ttomeandIwentst raightt o203, soccer .
Zet hu:Idon' tgetwhyyouwat chingsomet hingyoucan' tevenpl ay.
Me:Idon' thavet opl ayi t,Ijusthavet ounder standi t.
Zet hu:Yeahwhat ever ..
.Weengagedi nnumer ousconver sationst illl
at e.Thet imewas22: 00
whenIgotupandt ookt heal readysl eepyPhumza' shand.Ipul ledherupandwewentt oour
room, shewentt ohaveaqui ckshowerwhi l
eIal sogotr eadyf orbed.Igoti nbedandt ookmy
phone, Ihadawhat sappt extf rom Mandl aaski ngmywher eabout s.Hewant edust ot urnup, I
didn' tbot herr eplyi ngt ot hatbecausehewasn' tgoingt oseei ttilltomor rowmor ning.
.
.
Phumza:
Aftershower ingIl ot ionedmybodyandwor eagownt henwentt oourr oom.If oundYandi sa
busywi thhi sphonebutheputi tawayassoonasIcl osedt hedoor ,Ilookedf orapant yand
wor eitt hent ookof fthegownt olotionmybody.Af tert hatIwor eani ghtdr ess.
Me:Whyar eyoul ooki ngatmel i
ket hat ?
Him:Whosai dIwasl ooki ngatyou?
Me:Icanf eelyoureyesonme, canIt urnof ft helight s?
Him:Nol eavet hem on.
Her :Why?
Him:Because. .
.
Hegotoutofbedandwentt ot hedoort ol ockt henpul ledmet ohi m.
Me:Yandi sa. .
.
Ihel dhi sar ms, heact ual l
yhadmuscl es.Andt heywer esoost rong.
Him:Rel axwi llyou?Iwonthur tyou.
Hesai dt hatki ssi ngmyneck, Ihonest lydi dn'tknowhowt or eactt oitbuti tmademef eelweak.
Hest oppedandl ookedst rai
ghti ntomyeyesmaki ngmeshy, llookeddown.Hecar essedmy
cheekal lthewaydownt omychi nthenmademel ookathi m, att hatmomentIf eltlikecr yi
ng.
Heki ssedmynoset henl ips, Ihesi tatedbef oreki ssi nghi m backbutevent ual lyIdi d.He
wr appedhi sar msl oosel yar oundmyneckt henpul l
edmyni ghtdr essst rapsdownmy
shoul der sandpushedi tdown, droppi ngi tont hefloorsoIwasonl yleftinapant y.Hewr apped
myar msar oundhi sneckt henhi swentdownt omyassandsqueezedi tthenl i
ft
edmeup.
Me:Yandi sa. .
.
Imanagedt osaybet weent heki ss.
Him:Shhh. ..
Me:Yandi sa. .
.
Hebr oket heki ssandl ookedatme.
Him:Babe?
Ishookmyheadandki ssedhi m, Ididn' twanthi mt ol ookatme.Heki ssedmebackandl aidme
ont hebed.Hegotont opofmeandbet weenmyl egsr ubbi nghi sDagai nstmyP, Ihel dhi s
strongar msandanunusualsoundescapedmyl i
ps.Heki ssedmyneckwhi l
er ubbi ngagai nst
myvj ay, Icoul dn' thel pbutmoan.Ican' texplai nthef eel ingt hatcameovermebuti twas
unusual ,hegotmef eelingsexywhi chwassomet hingIwasn' tusedt osoIdi dn'tknowhowt o
act .Heki ssedmeal lthewaydownt omybel l
ybut tont henpul ledmypant ydownandt ooki toff
.
Iclosedmyl egsi mmedi atelyaf tertaki ngi tof fandhi demyf ace.
Him:Babe. ..
Heki ssedmyl egsf rom t het oesal lthewayupt omyt highsandopenedmyl egssl owl y,hegot
bet weent hem andki ssedmyl i
ps.Ihavenoi deawhenhet ookof fhisboxer ,ndethukewhenI
felthiscoldandst r ongdi ckknocki ngonmyvj ay.Imovedupal it
tlebuthehel dmyhi psand
pushedi n,Isl appedhi shands.
"tr
yt or el
ax", howt hehel lwasImeantt or el
axwi ththepai nbetweenmyl egs?
Me:Yandi sa...
Him:Baber elax, Iwonthur tyou.
Me:Butyouar ehur tingme.
Tear swer est reami ngoutofmyt ightl
ycl osedeyes.
Him:OkayIam sor ry, Iknowi thurts.
Ithoughthewasgoi ngt ost oppushi ngbuthedi dn'
tt il
l hewasi nme, Ifeltli
keslappinghi m
becauseoft hepai n.I thur tlikecrazy, Icouldn'tdot his, Icouldn'ttaket hepai nitwast oomuch
tobar e.SoIpushedhi sshoul dersbuthet ookmyhandsandki ssedt hem.
"I'
m sor rybutt hiswi llhur t",hemovedi ncirclesandt hepai nj ustescal ated.Iheldhisar ms
ti
ght l
y, maybet ootight l
ybecauseIcoul dfeelmynai lsdi ggingi nt
ohi sski n.Hewenton,
thrustinginandout ,si det osi de.Shitwasget t
ingreal ,Ihadneverf eltthatamountofpai ninmy
l
ife.Inmymi ndIwast hinkingwhenwi l
litbeover ?Whenwasheget tingof fme?Fi nallyhegot
offmeandsl eptnextt ome, putt
inghi sar m overmywai st.
"Thatwasamazi ng, youwer eamazi ng.Iloveyou" ,Ij ustl ookedathi m wonder ingwhatwas
amazi ngr eally?Iwasi npai nher eandher ehewast ell
ingmet hatIwasamazi ng.Heki ssedthe
sideofmyheadandcl osedhi seyes.
Him:Youl ooki ngatme.
Ikissedhi sar m, Idon' tknowwhynam.ThenIcl osedmyeyesandf ellasleep.

09
Yandi sa:
Thef ollowi ngdayIdeci dedt owakeupear l
y, whilemybeaut i
fulwifewasst illsl
eeping.Istil
l
couldn'tbel ievethatl astnighthappened, Ididn'tthinkitwoul dhappensoosoonbecauseoft he
wayshewasar oundme.Butmewaki ngupnakednextt omynakedwi f
ewasconvi ncing
enough, Ismi ledasIgotoutofbedandwor emyboxer s.Iwor emyshor t
st oot henwentt ot he
bathroom t opeeandbr ushmyt eeth, whenIpi ckedupmyt oot hbrushInoticedar edst ainon
myf inger s.Atl eastmom coul dhavehersheetnow!Iwashedt hem thenqui cklybrushedmy
teet
handwentt oZethu' sroom, Iknockedont hedooracoupl eoft i
meswhenwal kedin.
Me:Zet hu
Ishookherawake.
Her:Ha. anaYandi sa.
Shepul l
edhercoveroverherheadbutIpul l
edi tdown.
Me:Cel auvukenomdadepl ease.
Her:Whatdoyouwant ?
Me:Comet ot hekitchenpl ease, Ineedyourhel pwi thsomet hing.
Iwant edt ot reatmywi f
et obr eakfasti nbedbef oreshewokeupbutIhadonet i
nypr oblem, I
couldn'tdoj erk.Icoul dn'tevenf ryaneggf orGod' ssake.SoIneededZet hu'shelp.
Her:Thi sbet t
erbegoodYandi sa!
Shepushedmeandgotoutofbed, shewasi napant ykuphel asoIt ur
nedar ound.
Me:HayimanZet huwhydi dn'tyout el
lmet oleavet her oom?
Her:If orgot .
Me:Whywer eyousl eepi ngl i
kethatvel e?Ihopeyoudi dn' tsneaki namanaphaemzi nikat ata!
Her:Yohcomedown, someofusl ikesl eepingi nourbi r t
hdaysui t
s.Youshoul dtryit
.
Me:Fut sek.
Shel aughedandpul l
edmeoutofherr oom.
Her:Sowhatdoyouwantsooear l
y?
Itol
dher .
Her:Ncooooht hat'
ssoosweetofyou!
Me:Hayisuka!Wi llyouhel p?
Her:Sur e, Iwoul dsuggestsomet hingl i
ghtsi ncei tsst i
llearly.
Me:Andwhat '
sthatsomet hi nglight ?
Wewentt ot heki t
chen, washedherhandst hent ookoutal lthet hi
ngsshewoul dbeusi ng.
Her :Washandchopt hesef orme.
Shehandedmemushr oomsandt omat oes, Iwashedt hem int hesinkt henchoppedt hem the
waysheshowedmet odoi t.
Me:Whatar ewemaki ngvel e?
Her :Omel ette.
Me:Wi thsomuchi ngr edi ent s?
Ihandedhert hemushr oomssi nceIwasdone.
Her :St opaski ngandgr at echeesef orme.
Me:Idon' teatgr at edcheese.
Her :Chopi ti ntosmal lpi ecest hen.
Ididsoandgavei tt oherwhenIwasdone.Her" omel ette"smel leddivine,Ievenwi shedi twas
formebut .
..Wheni twasr eadyshedi shedup, madeherahotcupofcof feeecal enithengave
met het r ay.Ever yt hingl ookedgood, omel ettewi thtoast edbr eadandcof fee.
Me:Ioweyou.
Her :Justdon' tbreakherhear tl ikeal ltheot hergi rlsyouwer ewi th.
Me:OhIwont ,t
rustmeIwont .
Wewal kedt omyr oom, shehel pedmewi t
ht hedoor .If oundPhumi estil
lsleepi ngsoIputt he
trayont hesi detabl et hengotont hebed, behi ndherandki ssedhercheek.
Me:Mor ningmysl eepi ngbeaut y.
Her :Ha. ana. ..
Shepushedmyheadbutdi dn' twakeup.Thatdi dn'tseem t ohavedonet het ricksoIki ssedher
neck, shemoanedkamnandikanj ani .Hmm shej ustt ookmebackt ol astnight ,i
twasgood.
Yerr rr
!Shewasgood, Iwi shwecoul dhavegonef orhour sbutt hewayshewascr yingyohay.
Me:Phumibabe, myl ove. .
Her :Hmmm?
Me:I t
smor ningnow, vukababe.Ihavesomet hi ngf oryou.
Shest ret chedhersel fandImustsayshel ookedador able.SoIt ookmyphoneandsnappeda
fewpi ctur esofher ,shel ookedbeaut if
ul .Iputt hephoneawayassoonassheopenedhereyes,
shecl osedt hem agai nandpul l
edt hebedcoveroverherheadt ohideherf ace.Someonewas
feelingshybecauseIknowshewasn' tsl eepinganymor e.
Me:Comeonbabewakeup, Imadeyoubr eakf ast .
Her :Ha. anaIam nothungr y.
Me:Phumza
Her :Hmm?
Me:Ur ight ?
Her :No, mybodyhur ts.
Me:Sor rymyl ovebutt her ewasnoot herwaywecoul ddoi t.Ipromi senextt imei twi llbebett
er.
Sheuncover edherf aceandt ur nedt ofacemydi rection.
Her :Ihavesomet hi ngt ot ell you, pl easedon' tbemadatme.
Me:Icanneverbemadatyou, yi ntoni ?
Her :That 'sal i
e,remembert hatni ghtatt hehot el?Youwer emadatmeandyoushout edatme.
Ichuckl ed.
Me:Youdon' tforgethuh?Wel lIdi dn'tmeant oscar eyouorl eaveabadt astei nyourmout h.
Her :Justpr omi seyouwontshout .
Me:Ipr omi se.
Her :Jonga
Shel i
ftedt hebedcovert henl ookedatme, shehadt earsi nhereyes.
Her :Sor r y..
.
Me:I t
snot hingt ocr yover ,Iam notmad.Wecanchanget hesheet s,don'twor r
y.
Iwipedhert earst henki ssedhernosecausi nghert ogi ggle.Shewassooador ablet hough.
Her :Whyar eyoul ooki ngatmel iket hat?
Me:Li kewhat ?
Her :Liket hat ,yousmi ling.
Me:Yousoobeaut if
ul .
Her :Hayiwet huYandi sa. .
.
Shepushedmepl ayf ullyt henhi dherf acei nmychest .Ihaveneverbeenwi thsomeonet his
shysoIf oundi tsexy.
Me:Nyani .
..Butsi tupbef oreyourf oodget scol d.
ShesatupsoIt ookt het rayandputi tonherl ap.Shesmi led.
Her :Youmadet hi sforme?
Me:Wi t
hZet hu'shel p, yeah.
Her :Thankyou.
Me:Not hankyouf orbei ngmywi fe.
Shebl ushedandl ookeddownatherf ood.
Her :Ineedt obr ushmyt eet hf irst.
Me:Don' ttaket ool ong.
Iremovedt het raysoshegotoutofbedandwor eagownt henwal kedout .Iquickl
ygotof fbed
andr emovedt hesheetbutbekuphumel enasebhedi ni.Wasgoi ngt ocleant hi
slaterhayi,Iput
anot hersheett hengotonbedagai n.Shewal kedi nimmedi atelyafterthat,shegotont hebed.
Her :Thankyounyani .
Iplacedt het r
ayonherl ap.
Me:Anyt hingf oryou, yidla.
Shecl osedhereyesandopenedt hem af teraf ewmi nutes.Shepi ckedupt heforkanddugi n,
feedi ngmet oo.
.
Anywayaf tereat ingIt ookt hedi shest ot hekitchenandwashedt hem.I fi
twasupt omeshe
woul dn'tdoanyt hingt odaybutshef eltl
ikeitwasherdut yt okeept hehousecl ean.Sor i
ght
afterIf inishedwashi ngt hedi shesshewal kedi nandst artedcl eaning.
.
.
Phumza:
Aftercl eani ngImadebr eakf astf orever yoneandser vedt hem t henwentt ohaveapr operbat h.
Iwassoosor edownt her ebutaf termybat hIf elt,Iguess.Iwentt oourr oom toloti
onmybody
andgotdr essed, asIwasput t
ingadukeovermyheadYandi sawal kedinandr emovedi t.
Him:Idon' twantyout ousei t
.
Me:ButIhavet or espectyourpar ents.
Him:Theywi l
lunder standi fi t
scomi ngf rom me.
Me:Youst il
lhavet otal kt ot hem soi nt hemeant imeI '
llusei t.
Him:WhydoIsensest ubbor nnessi nyou?
Hel etgooft hedukeandwentt osi tont hebed.
Me:I '
m notst ubbor n.
Ifi
ni shedwhatIwasdoi ngandwentt ojoinhi m ont hebed.Idon' tknowwhathewasdoi ngon
hisphonebuthel ookedbusy.
Him:Sohowar eyounow?
Me:Bet ter .
Him:Hmmm. .Iwast alkingt odadphezol o.
Me:About ?
Heputhi sphoneawayandl ookedatme.
Him:Doyout hinkweneedourownspace?
Ishr ugged, Ididn' tseeapr oblem wi t
husl i
vingher e.Ilovedi taphat houghi twouldbeni ceto
havemyownspaceandl essr esponsi bi
liti
es( justYandi sa) ,Ididn'tsignupf orthewhol efami l
y.
Him:Wel lhesaysIneedt ogr owup, appar entlyIam st il
limmat ure.Andmovi ngoutwi l
lhelp
mebecomemyownman, tober esponsi ble.
Inodded.
Him:Comeont al kt ome, don'tj ustnod.
Her estedhi sheadonmyl apandpul l
edmebymyneck, Ijustpeckedhi slips.
Him:Sowhatdoyousay?
Me:Honest lyitwoul dbeni cet ohaveourownspace.
Him:SoIshoul dst artlooki ngf orani ceflat?
Me:Yeah.
Him:Hmm. ..
Hepul ledmet ohi slevel agai nandweshar edaki ss.Webr okei taftersomet i
meandspokenj e
aboutanyt
hingandeverythi
ng.Andthat
'sexactl
ywhatIneededtobr
eakoutofmyshel
l,
he
wascool,f
ree-
spir
it
ed,crazy,
playf
ul,
hewasj ustacheer
fulsoul
.

10
Yandi sa:
Acoupl eofhour slat er:
Ideci dedt ot akemywomanshoppi ngf oranout fitshewoul dbewear ingt onight ,Iwast reati
ng
hert odi nnerataf ancyr est aurantandmaybeamovi el at
er.Iwant edhert olookherbest , I
l
oved/ l
oveagi rl whodr essesi nst ylebutst illkeepst hedecency( nobum shor ts,leggings, mini
-
skirtsorcr opt ops) .Butunf ortunat elymywi fedi dn’ thaveanysenseofst yle,shedr essedl i
ke
mymot herormaybeevenwor se.Don’ tgetmewr ongIl ovemywi febuthersenseofst yl
ewas
toodul l andsnobbi sh, i
tspel l
edf arm gi rlfrom adi stancedsoIwasgoi ngt opi mpher .
Whenwegott ot hemal lItookhert oFoschi ni ,
Iexpect edhert otakewhatshel ikedbuti nstead
shewentf ort hepr ice.
Her :Ha. aYandi sat hesear et ooexpensi ve, can’ twegosomewher eelse?
Me:Ha. amyl ovewor rynotaboutt hepr ice, justt akewhat everyoul i
ke.
Her :anyt hingIl i
ke?
Me:anyt hingyoul ike.
Shebi t
ehernai lsandl ookedar ound.Ismi ledandshookmyhead.
Her :theyal lbeaut ifulsoIdon’ tknowwhatIwant .
Me:wantmet ohel pyou?
ShenoddedsoIst ar t
edpi ckingout fi
tsf orher ,
IknewhowIwant edmywi fet odr esssoIhadi t
allundercont rol.
Her :Ican’ twearpant s, whatwi llyourpar entssay?
Me:youar emywi feandIhavenopr obl em wi t
hyouwear i
ngt hem.Jaht heseshoul dbeenough,
gof itthem andseehowyoul ooki nt hem.
Her :wher edoIf i
tthem?
Wewal kedar oundt hest orel ooki ngf orf itt
ingr oomst i
llwef oundt hem, shewant edmet ogoi n
withherbutt hatwasn’ tallowed.
Me:I ’l
lwai taphamyl ove, comeshowmehowyoul ook.
Shenoddedandwenti nsoIwai tedbyl ooki ngar oundt hestore,Iwentt othephonesect ion
whichwasn’ tt hatf arf r
om t hef ittingr ooms.Iwant edt obuyheraphonesoshecoul dbei n
cont actwi thherpar ents, Icoul dt ellshemi ssedt hem butshewasaf r
aidofaski ngf ormy
phonet ocal lthem.Ashopassi st antcamet omewhi leIwasl ooki
ngnj e,Ididn’tknowwhi ch
phonet ogether .
S.assi stant :looki ngt obuyanewphone?
Me:yeahbutf orsomeone, shewoul dwantasi mpl ephonebecauseshei ssimpl eher self.
Her :oht hat ’ssweet ,I’
m sur eshewi llappr eci ateit.
Me:yeah.
Her :girlf
r i
endormot her ?
Me:wi feact ual ly.
Her :ohyoumar ri
ed?
Ishowedhermyr ingf i
nger .
Me:yeahwet iedt heknott hispr eviousSat urday.
Her :ohwhatal uckygi rl.
Me:I ’mt hel uckyonet rustme.
Ilookedatt hef itti
ngr oom door , shest eppedoutl ooki ngWOW!Ial mostdi dn’trecogni zeheri n
thatout fit,shel ookedatmeandshr ugged.
Me:beaut iful myl ove, fi
tther estandi ft heyf i
tsizoyobhat ala.
Shesmi ledandwentbacki n.
“Hhmm shei sbeaut iful…wepr omot i
ngper fumessomaybeyoucanal sogeti tforherasa
secondgi ft”,If orgott hatt heassi stantwasst il
lst andi ngnextt ome.Ilookedather .
Me:l etmegett hephonef i
rstt henI ’
llcomet oyou.
Her :promi se?
Me:Ipr omi sel ady.
Shesmi ledandwal kedbackt ohersect ion, Igotanot herassi stanttohelpmewi t
hthephones.I
deci dedonaSamsungJ5, i
twassi mpl esoi twasn’ tgoi ngtobehar df orhert ousei t.Igoti t
cash, eishumt uwasgoi ngt ogobr oket ryi
ngt oi mpr essawoman.Whenshewal kedoutoft he
fi
ttingr oom IusedmyMar kham car dtoswi pef orthecl ot
hest henl ef tforTr uwor ths, Igother
shoesandper fumet henpai d.Af terthatwewentt oourcari nthepar kingl ot,Iputherpl asti
cs
i
nt hebackseatt hengoti nthedr iver’sseat .
Phumi :thankyouf oral lofthi s.
Me:anyt hingf oryoumyl ove.
Shesmi ledsoIst artedt hecaranddr oveushome.
.
.
Phumza:
Wegothomeandpar kedbehi ndhi sf ather ’
scart hengotof f.Itookmypl ast i
csf rom t he
backseat .
Him:sebebuyi le
Me:hmm…
Wewenti nsi deandf oundt hem i nt hel ounge, wegr eet ed.
Mama:wooohni yeshoppi ng?
Yandi sa:Ij ustwant edt ospoi lmywi fe, wegoi ngoutf ordinnert onightsoZet huwi l
lhavet o
cook.
Mama:hmm i sn’ tshel uckyt ohavesomeonewhol ovesandspoi lsher ?
Shel ookedatherhusband.
Tata: kakhul u.
Mama:i fonl yIal sohadsuchasweethusband.
Ismi l
ed, thiswomanwasunbel ievabl e.
Tata: hayi nkosi kaziyounotgoi ngt ocompar eust ot heseki ds,theynewl yweds.Theywi llwant
tospoi l eachot her .
Yandi sal aughed.
Yandi sa:hayimyl ovet hat ’
sourqueue.
Hepul l
edmet oourr oom, Iputt hepl asticsont hebedandt ookoutmynewcl othes.Il oved
them, al loft hem i ncludi ngmyphoneandper fume.I twasmyf irstphoneandper f
ume, ibinuka
kamnandi .Ihadnoi deat hisiswhatmar ri
agehadi nst oreforme, bei nglovedandspoi led.
Yandi sa:f reshenupkenkosi kaziwam wewi llbel eavi ngat7: 00.
Me:canIweart heset oni ght?
Him:sur e, that ’
swhyweboughtt hem.
Ismi l
ed, Iwassoexci tedaboutt onight .
Him:I ’l
laskOl wet hut ocomehel pyougetr eady, sheknowswhatIl i
ke.
Me:okay.
Heki ssedmycheekt henwal kedout ,Ifol l
owedaf terhi m butt ot hebat hroom.Ishower ednj e
thengotoutandwentt oourr oom, Olwet huwasal readyt hereandl ooki ngt hrought hecl othes.
Her :ni yaphi ?
Me:Idon’ tknow, allIknowi st hatwegoi ngt oeatout .
Her :hmmm knowi ngubhut i
, yougoi ngsomewher ef ancy.Hei sashowof fbuthei sst i
llvery
sti
ngywheni tcomest ospendi ngmoney.
Ididn’ tknowt hatst i
ngysi deofhi m kemna, hej ustboughtmeal ltheset hings.
Her :thambi sadon’ tjustst andt her e.
YuhuOl wet hut hough!Shet ookawhi teshi rtandwal kedout .Ilotionedmybodyt henwor ea
pant yandbr at henwai tedf orOl wet hu.Whi leIwasst il
l wait
ingYandi sawal kedi nandwent
straightt ot hecl oset , het ookoutwhat everhewasgoi ngt oweart henwal kedout .Ol wet hu
fi
nal lycameback, shegavemebl uehi ghwai stjeansandwhi teshi rt.Itwasal readyi ronedsoI
wor ei taf t
erwear ingt hej eans, shet oldmet ot ucki nt hef r
ontpar tthengavemepeachsandal s.
Ididandwor ewhat evershet hr ewatme.
Her :si tdown
Isatdownandshest yledmyt wi stdownt hendi dmymake- up, anat ur all
ookandIl ooked
beaut if
ul .Whenshewasdoneshepackedapeachcl utchbag, put ti
ngmyphone, facepowder
andr edl i
pst i
ck.Shegavei tt omet oget herwi thaj acket .
Her :fort ouchups.
Me:t hankyou.
Her :anyt hingf ormybr ot her ’squeen.
Oh!Wowwast hatr eallyOl wet hu?Andwast hatacompl iment ?
Her :don’ tweart hej acket ,justputi toveryourshoul der si ncasei tscol d.
Me:okayt hanksagai n.
Her :pl easur e, l
et sgot oyourmanke.
Igotupandl ookedatt hemi rror ,Ilookedst unni ngi nt hej eans.I twasmyf i
rstpairofj eans, dad
didn’tal lowmet owearpant s.Anywaywewentt ot hel oungewher eever yonewas, evenZet hu.
Olwet hu:Ipr esentt oyout henewMr sYandi saQhaweDl ami ni.
Whenever yonel ookedatmeIl ookeddown, Iwasst i
llsooshy.
Mama:whoawamhl emakot i.
Me:Thankyoumama.
Tat a: uqaphel eangat hat hwawher everyougoi ng.
Yandi sa:Hayikal oktat ai nqi ndil ikhonanj e.
Tat a: Good!It aughtyouwel l
.
Mama:Hayit at akhe, nopunchi ngpeopl ebaby.
Tat a: YindodauYandi sahei sn' tababyanymor e.
Mama:Hewi llal waysbeababyt ome, mybaby.
Yandi sa:Hayimamanoti nf rontofmywi fe.
Wel aughed, hegotup.
Yandi sa:Shal lwekemadam?
Hehel douthi shandf orme, It ooki tandhepul ledmef rom wher eIwasst anding.
Mama:Havef un, ningabuyi latekakhul uYandi sa.
Yandi sa:Hahmamawej ustgoi ngt oeatandwat chamovi e.
Mama:Lookaf terher .
Yandi saj ustl aughedandwewentoutt ohi scar ,heopenedt hedoorf orme.Igotonandcl osed
thenhewentt ohi ssi de, hegotont henl ookedatme.
Him:Di dIt ellyouhowbeaut ifulyoul ook?
Ishookmyhead.
Me:Butdon' t.
Him:Becauseyougoi ngt obl ush?
Me:Hayiwet hu.
Hesmi led.
Him:Il oveyou.
Me:Il oveyout oo.
Itjustcameoutunexpect edl y, hel eanedovert omysi deandpeckedmyl i
pst hengotbackt o
hissi deandst ar tedtheengi ne.Hedr oveout .
.
Wegott othepl aceandpar ked, wegotof fke.Hecamet omysi deandt ookmyhandt henwe
wal kedi nt other estaur ant ,awai terorwhat evert ookourj ackets.Hewasal soinbl uejeansand
whi teshi rt,sowemat ched.Wewer eshownt oat ablebyawai t
erwhoi ntr oducedhi msel fas
Bryan, awhi teguy.Hegaveusmenust henl ef tust odeci de, thepl acewascl assyandbeaut if
ul.
Mor ebeaut ifult hant hef irstpl acehet ookmet o,Ilookedar oundandbekukhonaabel ungunj e.I
didn'tevengot hr ought hemenubecauseIt rust edhi mt oor derf ort hebot hofus.Whenhehad
deci dedhecal l
edbackt hewai terandpl acedouror ders.Weengagedi naconver sationwhi le
wewai tedf orourf ood.Af teraf ewmi nutesourwai t
erbr oughtourf ood, Isai dasi lentprayer
bef oreeat i
ngt henweat e.Atl eastIdi dn'tneedakni f
ef ort his,hesai ditwaspast erandi twas
delicious.Af tereat ingheor der eddeser tf ort hebot hofusandanot herr oundofdr i
nkst hen
settledt hebi ll
.Wegotupandwentt ot hedoor ,Br yangaveusourj acket st henwewal kedour .
Hedr oveust ot hemal l
.
.
Whenwegott ot hemal lwegotof fafterpar kingandwal kedi nhandi nhand.
Yandi :Babedon' tbemadpl easebutwemeet ingmyf riendsher e,theywi t htheirgi rl
fri
endst oo
soyouwontf eelcr owdedbyt heboys.Butwegoi ngt owat chamovi easpr omi sedt hensi ye
ekhaya.
Inodded.Whenwegott ot heci nemahi sf r i
endswer eal readywai tingt her e,hei ntroducedus.
Pr
operl
ythisti
me,t
heywer
ehypermanyer
r!Anywaywegotpopcor
nanddr
inkst
henwal
ked
i
ntothecinema.

I
twasani
ghtwel
lspentwi
thmyhusbandandhi
shyperf
ri
ends.

11
Phumza:
Thet imewas11whenwegothomeandpr epar edf orbed.Ir eal l
yhadanepi cni ghtandI
couldn' twai tt ot ellmysi ster .Shewasgoi ngt obesoohappyf orme, shet alkedmei ntot his
afteral l
.Icoul dn' twai ttillmor ni ng, Iwasexci tedandt hatgavemet roubl esl eepi ng.Iwas
feeli
ngal i
ttl
eoverwhel med, Ihadal lthesef eelingst hatIcoul dn'tunder standandi twasal l
becauseofYandi saandf orYandi sa.Ikeptt ossi ngandt ur ning, tryingdi ff
er entsl eepi ng
positionsbutst il
l dol oloubut hongo.
"Can'tsl eep? "
Me:Sor r
yIdi dn' tmeant owakeyouup.
Him:OhIcoul dn' tsl eepei ther .
Iknowhewasl yi ngbecausehef ellasl eepi mmedi atel yaf terget t
ingi nbed.
Me:Youdon' thavet ol iet omakemef eel better.
Him:Andar eyou?
Me:Nope.
Him:Hmm comeher e..
.
Igotcl osert ohi m andheputhi sar m overmywai stthenl eanedi nf oraki ss, Imethi m hal f
way
andourl i
psl ocked.
Him:Howaboutnow?
Ishookmyhead, hechuckl edandwecont i
nuedki ssing.Hi shandwentdownt omyasst hen
undermyni ght dr essandupt omyboobs.Her ubbedont hem f oraf ewsecondt henst opped
andgotbet weenmyl egs, hepul ledmeupandt ookof ft heni ghtdr essf ollowedbymypant y.I
gotscar edal loveragai n, lastni ghtwasawf ulandIdi dn'twantt ogot hrought hatsameamount
ofpai n.Het ookof fhi sboxer st hengotof fme.
Him:Sl eeponyoursi debabe. .
ThoughIdi dn' twantt odot hisIcoul dn'tsaynosoIobeyedandsl eptonmysi de.Hegotbehi nd
me, kissi ngt hebackofmyneckt henl i
f t
edmyl egupandhi sDf or cedhi swayi ntomyst i
llsor e
vjay.Igr abbedt hepi ll
owt omymout handt ear swi l
lowedoutofmyeyes, i
thur tespeci al
ly
whenhest artedt hr ust i
ngi ndeepert oapoi ntwher eIf elthi mi nmyst omach.Iwant edt ocl ose
myl egs, maybet hepai nwoul dgoawaybutheputhi sar m undermyl egandt ookmyhandi nto
his.Thenhest ar tedt hrust ingi nandoutofmyvj ay, ever ybi tofi twasawf ul lypai nful .Hispace
i
ncr easedever ysecondandsodi dmymoans, Idi dn'tr ealiset hatIwasl oudt il
lheputhi shand
overmymout h." shhh" ,hewhi sper ed.Hest oppedandf li
ppedmet omyst omach, put ti
nga
pill
owundermet osuppor tmyassup.Hedi dmei nt hatposi tionandi twaswor set hant hef i
rst,
i
tf el
tlikehewasshaggi ngt hel ifeoutofmybody.Icoul dn' tbreat hei nthatposi ti
on, Ithinkhe
not i
cedbecausehef li
ppedmeoversohecoul dbeont op.Hepoundedmer eal l
yf astandhar d
thencol l
apsedont opofme, heki ssedmyneckt henpul ledoutsl owl y.Hel ookedatmeand
peckedmyl ipsbef or eget tingof fme.Hesl eptnextt omesoIsl eptonmysi def acinghi s
direction.Hewassoaki ngwetsoIwi pedhi sf ace, hesmi ledr eveal i
nghi sdi mpl es.Hehada
char mi ngsmi le, anyl adywoul df allinl ovewi t
handIwasdef i
ni t
elyf alli
ngf ori tandhi m.He
tookmyhandi ntohi sandki ssedi tt hencamef ormyl i
ps.
Him:Readyf oranot herr ound?
Hedi dn' tgivemeachancet oanswert ot hat ,hepul ledmeont opofhi m andsatmeonhi s
manhoodwi thi tinsi deme.Hehel dmywai standpul ledmeupanddownhi smanhoodt heni n
circl
es. ..
.
Whenmor ningcameIhadt r
oubl ewaki ngupunl i
kel astni ghtwhenIhadt roubl esl eepi ng, my
l
owerbodywasi nknot sandi thur tli
kecr azy.Butasumakot iIhadt owakeupandcl eant henI
couldst artcooki ngChr i
st masl unch.Soaf terhavi ngashowerIl ot i
onedandgotdr essed.
"Babedi dyouhaveyouwakeupt hisear ly?",Ifini shedt yingt heduket henl ookedathi m.
Me:Ihavet ocl eant henst artcooki ng.
Him:Hmm canIgetmyki ssf irst?
Me:Di dn'tyougetenoughoft hatl astnight ?
Him:Howcoul dIwhenyouwer eonf i
re?
Me:Hayisukawet hu.
Him:Ser i
ousyouwer eevent wer kingonme.
Hegotoutofbedandwal kedovert ome, hewasbut tnaked.
Me:Me?Twer king?Liket hosevi deogi rls?No!
Hel aughedandki ssedmyf oreheadt henwr appedhi sar msar oundme, Ikissedhi schestand
wr appedmyar msar oundhi swai st.Whenal loft hisst art
edIhadnoi deat hatIwoul df allfor
himt hissoonandhar d, Ilovedt hisman.
Him:Il ovedi tthough.
Me:ComeonIwasn' tt wer king.
Hel aughed.
Him:I fyougi vemeaki ssmaybeI '
llstopsayi ngyouwer et werking.
Ilookedupathi m andweshar edt hesexi estkissofal lt
imes.
Him:Hmm. ..(
hebr okei t)ifyoucont inueki ssingmel i
ket hisImi ghtjustr ipthisdressof fyou.
Me:Ust outwena.
Isai dhi tt
inghi schest ,hesmi l
edandki ssedmynose.
Me:Ineedt owasht hesebl anket sf ir
st.
Theyhadl astni ght'
ssweatsoIhadt owasht hem, mom sai dt hesheet shadt obecl eanal lt
he
time.Heunwr appedhi sar msar oundmeandwor ehi sboxer sasIt ookt hesheetandbl anket.I
wonderwhathappenedt oyest erday'ssheet .
Me:Qhawe. ..
Him:Myl ove?
Me:Whathappenedt oyest erday' ssheet ?
Him:Yest er day'ssheet ?
Me:Theonewi ththe...Uyazi nje.
Hel aughed.
Him:Sayi t( Ishookmyheadwi t
hasmi leonmyf ace, Yandi sawasunbel ievable)whyar eyou
soshywoman?
Me:I phi ?
Him:Justwasht hoseonesuyi yekel enye.
Me:Ohwhy?
Him:Because. ...Uthandai ndaba!
Ishookmyheadandl aughed.
Me:Igi veuponyou.
Hel aughedasIt ookthebl anket sandwal kedout .
.
.
Yandi sa:
Ifol l
owedaf t
erherbutt ot hebat hroom, Ibr ushedmyt eetht hengoti nt heshower .Af ter
shower ingIgotoutandwentt omyr oom, Il
ot i
onedt hengotdr essedi nbl ackshor tsandwhi t
et
-shirt.Iwor epushNi kepushi nst henwentt ot heki tchen, Imademysel fahotcupofcof feeand
tooki twi thmet othebackyar d.Isatont hecampchai rt
hatwekeptt her eandr oll
edabl unt,
I
wascr avingasmoke.Bef or esmoki ngIt ookof fmyt -
shirt, t
ookasi ponmycof feethenl itmy
kushandt ookapuf f
.Yeahweedwasmyt hing, Icouldgoadaywi thoutsmoki ngitt hough.I
exhal ed, woaht hatwasr elaxing.Ther ewasnot hingl ikeapeacef ulsmoke.
"Ekuseninj e?",Phumzasai dasshewal kedoutwi t
hawashi ngbasket .Eish!Iputmyhand
undert hecampchai r,didn' twanthert oseet hatbutIcoul dn'tputitof feither.Ayf ucki t!Iwas
goi ngt osmokemybl unt .
Me:Youdonenj alo?
Her :YepI '
m goi ngtohangt heset hengobacki nsidet ocl ean.
Me:Needhel p?
Her :Ar en' tyoubusy?
Itookapuf f.
Me:Neeeeh!
Shel ookedatmewi t
hasmi leonherf ace.
Her:Khul ulekaIgott hi s.
Me:That '
smywi fe!
Weshar edal augh, shedi dwhatshecameoutt odo.
Me:Pl easemakecer eal sformewhenyoudonet her e, i
ft hatwontbet oomucht rouble.
Her:Okaynopr oblem.
Me:Br ingi touther ene?
Shenoddedandt ookt heempt ybasketi nsidewi thher .If inishedmysmoket hendr ankmy
coffee.Af t eraf ewmi nut esPhumi br oughtmeabowlofcer eal.
Me:Thankyoubabe.
Her:Anyt i
me.
Webabyki ssedt henshewentbacki nside.
.
Aftereat i
ngIwor emyt -
shirtthent ookt hebowli nsi de, l
ookedl i
keever yonewasawakeand
busywi thsomet hing.Mom andOl wet huwer echangi ngt hecur tains,ZethuandPhumzawer e
moppi ngt hef loor.
"womenandChr i
st mas" ,dadsai dwal kingoutoft heki tchenwi t
hacupofcof fee.
Me:Igetwhyt heyf ussi ngoveri t,itsl i
keanyot herday.
Him:Exact lyandt heyj ustchangedt hesecur tainsaweekago.
Me:Hayi ..
Him:Masi thetheZi zi...
Me:Ar ightI 'l
lbet her e.
Iwentt oputt hebowl i
nt hesi nkt henwentt odadi nt hebackyar d.
Him:UyamphauNkosi kazi yer r!
Hesai dasIsatdownonachai rnextt ohi m.
Him:Thewhol enighthayi youst r
ong.
Me:Tat a?
Iseriouslydi dn'tknowhowt or eactt ot hat .Iwashopi ngt heydi dn' thearthat,i
twas
embar rassi ng.
Him:Kant irelaxyouar eyourf ather 'sson.Yout akeaf terme, whenIwasyourageIwasj ustl
ike
you.St rong!Ikeptyourmot herawakeal lni...
Me:Yoht oomuchi nf ot ata.
Hel aughed.
Him:AndIst il
lam, umamakhouya. ..
Me:Dad!
Agai nhel aughed.Idi dn' twantt oknowaboutt hei rsexl ifegosh!
Him:I t
sagoodt hing, i
tkeepst hef ireal iveinamar riage.
Ichuckl edandl ookedathi m, hewasn' tevenpayi ngat tent iontome.Hehut at
a!Het ookasi pon
hiscoffee.
Him:Don' tbeembar rassedson, uyaphi waunkosi kaziungamnci shitheyl ovethisthing
especiallywhenyour eal l
ygoodati t.MnakeIam bl essedandgoodi nthatdepar tment,Idon't
l
ackanyt hi ng.I fyoudoIdon' tknowwhoyout akeaf terbecausemna, undibuzekunyoko.You
andyoursi ster sarepr oof .
Agai nIchuckl ed,myf athert hough!
Him:Butj udgi ngf rom whatIhear dl astni ghthayiyour eallytakeaf t
erme.
Me:Youknownawet ataweZi zi mendon' tdohal fjobs, wedoi ttoourbest .
Him:Tot heTeenyanaandt hat 'sthewayi tshoul dbe.Ungar obhikonaezokwanel i
seka
unkosikazi .
Inodded, whatat al k!
Him:Af terl astnightdon' tyout hinkyouneedsomepr i
vacy?Yourownspace?
Me:Iact ual lyspoket oheraboutt hatyest er dayandwemovi ngoutassoonaswef indaf l
at.
Him:Goodbutuyazi Iam nother et ot alkaboutt hat, ithinii ntokamakot i?
Me:Wel ldad. .
.ShewasasIexpect edhert obe.
Him:Egcwel e?
Me:Mf i
!
Hel aughed.
Him:Mf inyana?Uyabonaasi kulahl ekisanga?
Me:Notatal ltata, Iam bl essedt ohaveheryazit ata.Shei saf ullpackaget at
a. .
.Sherespects
me, lovesme, cant akever ygoodcar eofme, shecancook.Ukhut hel e,humble.Shehasa
beaut if
ulhear t
.Andshemakesmewantt obeaper fectmanf orher .
Him:Justl ikeyourmot her.
Me:Yeah, shemakesmef eellikear ealman.
Him:Li keaki ng..
Me:Exact ly.
Him:That 'sexact l
yhowIf eltwhenImetyourmot herandIwant edyout oexper i
encetheexact
samef eeling.AndIknewt hatgi rlwoul dmakeyouf eell iket hat .
Me:Thankyout ata.
Him:I twasapl easur eson.Nowal l youhavet odonowi sl oveandr especther .Showherhow
muchyouappr eciateher ,ever ydayshoul dbeaVal ent ine' sday.Cel ebr at
eyourl oveeveryday,
holdi tdeart oyourhear t
.Hol dherdeart oyourhear t,treatherl i
keaqueen.Takecar eofher,
don'thur theranddon' teverl ayahandonher .Ifonedayyouf eellikedoi ngthatjustwalkout
butneverseekcomf ortinthear msofanot herwoman.Gobackt oyourwi fewhenyouar ecalm
andsor tthingsout .
Me:Ndi yakuvat ata.
Him:That 'showyoumakeamar riagewor k.Justdon' tbeweakandl ethercont r
olyou,putyour
footdownwhenyouhavet o.Uyabonangobayouar egoi ngt obet hemanoft hehouse, you
can'taf f
or dtobeweak.
Me:Ewet ata.
Him:Ngqo!
Me:Thankyouf ort het al
kt ata.
Him:I tsonl yapl easur e.
Me:Sowhatnow?Whatshoul dIdowi ththesheet ?
Him:Whenyougoi nsidegi veitt oyourmot her,shewi llknowwhatt odowi t
hi t
.
Me:Ewet ata.
Him:Jah, thenextst epnowi sstar tingaf ami l
y.Wewantgr andchildr en,sibi
zwe
ngot ataomkhul u.
Me:Idon' tthinkIam r eadyt obeaf ather,Iam st illlear ninghowt obeahusband.Idon' twanta
biggerr esponsi bi l
it
y.
Him:Bei ngaf athercomesnat ural ly.
Me:Hayit at aandazi butallIknowi sIam notf ondofki ds, bayahl upha.
Him:Justl ikeyou, youwer eanui sance.Al waysget tingi nt otroubl eatschoolandwi t
hthegi r
ls.
Me:Iwasachar mert atagi rl
sl ovedandf oughtf ormehayingoku, Iam ol d.Mar ri
ed,whowi l
l
fi
ghtf oranot herwoman' sman?
Hel aughedandwecont i
nuedt alkingnj e.

12
Yandisa:
At10:00mom cal ledusi nforbreakfastandbecausei
twasChr i
stmas(
fami
ly)daywewere
eati
ngar oundt hediningtable.Isatdownnextt omybeauti
fulwif
eandmom dishedupf
or
everyoneel sebutme.
Me:Mnamama?
Mom:Oht odayyoudon' thaveawi fe?Umt uuservaumtuwakhe.
Tata:Ngqowenankosi kazi
.
Ichuckled.
Me:Hehumamanot ata!
TheylaughedasPhumigotupt odishupf orme.
Me:KodwamamaIam st il
lyourbaby.
Mama:I ndodaengaka?Hayi sukawet hu.
Phumigavememyf ood.
Me:Thankyoumyl ove.
shesmi led.
Zethu:Woahani sathandani!
Wel ookedateachot herandsmi led.
Tata:Befor eweeatIwoul dliket osaysomet hing.Kahlekahl eIwantt othankt helor
df or
keepingmywi f eandki dssaf eandpr otectedkudekubeyi miniyanamhl anj
e.Iam blessedt obe
ali
veandspendi ngt hisdaywi t
hal lf
ourofyou, Iloveyou.
Us:Wel oveyout oot ata.
Him:Makot i,Ithankt hel or df orbr i
ngingyoui ntot hi
sfamily.TodayIdon' tjusthavet hree
chil
drenbutIhavef our.Idon' thaveadaught eri nlaw,Ihaveadaught er.Thisisyourf i
rst
Christmaswi thus, Iwantyout oknowt hatwear ehappyt obewi thyouapha.Wear ehappyt hat
youar epar tofourf ami l
yandwehopeuzi vausekhaya.
Itookherhandandki ssedi t.
Her:Idot ata, thankyou.
Mam:Wear er eallyhappyt oshar ethef i
rstofmanyChr i
stmasdayswi t
hyou.
Shesmi ledbuti twaski ndofcr ookedngat hishewasf orci
ngi tout .Sheevenhadt earsi nher
eyes,hayimywi feandhert ear s.Hayit heywer er eal
lybestfriends.
Him:Hayi kel etseat .
Us:Finally.
Hel aughedandwest artedeat i
ng.
.
Ther estoft hedaywentbeaut i
fullywell,wehadani cefami l
yl unchwi thtwoofmybestf r
iends
(LubanziandMandl a).Mywi fewast hechefandshecoul dcook, damnshecoul dcook!Even
Mandl aandLubanzicoul dn'tgetovert oday'
smeal ,i
twasmout hwat eri
ng.Anywayl aterwe
wentt ochi l
latLubanzi 'shousesi ncehi sparentswer en'
thome, justmeandt heboys.

Dayswentby>>31stDec
.
.
Yandi sa:
Wehavebeenmar r i
edf ortwoweeksnowandt hi
ngsbet weenuswer egoi ngper fectlywel l,j
ust
thewayIwant edt hem t ogo.Ourl ovewasmat uringever yday,Iwascr azyabouther ,shewas
crazyaboutme.I twasj ustcr azyhowqui cklywef el
linlovewi theachot herbutIcoul dn'
tbe
happi er.Ihadf oundt her ightonef orme, theonewhocompl i
ment edmyper sonality.Mandl a
saidIwasbewi tchedt hewayIl ovedherngakhona.Icoul dn'
tevenhangoutwi t
ht heboys
anymor eandi fIwaswi ththem, Iwasei t
heronmyphonet al
kingtomywi feort al
kingabouther .
Itwasj ustcr azyandsounl i
keme.
AnywayIhadj ustgotbackf rom t own, Iwentt obuymeatanddr i
nksf orlater.Myi nl awswer e
atourhouset ocel ebrat ethenewyear '
sevewi thusanddadt houghti twoul dbeagoodi deat o
haveani cebr aai f
ort hem soIdeci dedt oinviteaf ewofmyf riendsjustt ospi ceitupal i
ttle.I
wassur roundedbywomenandt wobor ingol dmenwhower etalki
ngaboutt heirst uff,
unfortunat el
yIhadnobr otheri nlawsobei ngtheonl yyoungmani nthehouseatt hatpar t
icular
daysucked.Ihadnoonet ot alkt oandt hati swhyIi nvit
edmyf ri
ends.Anywayaf terpar kingI
gotof fandt ookt hemeatanddr inkst ot heki t
chen, IfoundZet huandPhumzabusymaki ngpap
andsal ads.Iputever ythingont hecount ert henpour edmysel fagl assofwat er.
Zethu:Shoul dn'tyoust artthef irei nsteadofst andingt heredoingnot hing?
Me:Whatdoyoumeannot hing?Iam dr inkingwat er, hel
lo!
Shel aughed.
Zethu:Aveumuncu!
Ilaughedandputt hegl assdown.
Me:I '
m st il
lwai tingf orLubaandMandl a,theywi l
lhel pme.
Her:Youi nvitedt hem?
Me:Yeahandi t
hi noonei spayi ngat tent i
ont omet oday, notevenmywi fe.
Eversi nceherpar entsgother et hismor ningshehasbeenscar ce,Ionlysawherwhenshewas
servi
ngmebr eakf astandl unchsoImi ssedher .Butt henagainIunder stood.
Zethu:Youdon' thaveawi feket odayshame.
Me:Uyabonakodwa?
Phumzal ookedatusandsmi led.
Me:Idon' tknowwhyyousmi l
ing.
Phumza:I '
llbewi thyouj ustnow.
Me:Hayiungezi .
Shelaughedanddr oppedwhatshewasdoi ng.Shewal kedovert omeandwr appedherar ms
aroundmywai stt henl ookedupatme.
Phumza:Xol ovha?
Ipretendedt osul kandl ookedaway.Sheki ssedmychi n,Itr
iedsoohar dtokeepast r
aightface
butaf terthati twasal mosti mpossi bl e.
Phumza:Qhawe
Me:Hmm?
Her:Ar eyoumadatmenow?
Me:Ewe.
Her:Imi ssedyounj enam.
Me:Itdoesn' tfeell i
kei t
.
Her:Sor ry, Ipromi seaf t
ercooki ngndi zonakawena.
Ismiledt henl ookedatherandpeckedherl i
ps.Shehi tmychestandwal kedawaybutIpul led
herbackt omeandwr appedmyar msar oundherwai st.
Her:Udl al angam wena.
Me:Hmmm. .
.youowemesomet hing.
Her:Whataboutourpar ents?
Me:Itwi l
lbequi ck.
Shewr appedherar msar oundmyneckt henpul l
edmedownt oherl evel
, wesharedaki ss.
Zethu:OhmyGodyout wo!
Webr oket heki ssandl aughed.
Zethu:Youmakewantt of alli
nl ove.
Me:Sor rynomdade. ..babel etmegost artthef i
rene.
Phumza:Al r
ight .
Webabyki ssedt henIt ookt hecoalandwentt othebackyar d.Mandl aandLubanziar rived
whent hef irewasr eadysot heyhel pedmebr aaithemeat .
.
.
Phumza:
Whenwewer edonecooki ngandmaki ngsal adswepour edour selvesdrinksthenwentt osit
outside, wher emyhusbandandhi sf riendswer e.Onlytheywer en'talone,OlwethuandBul elwa
werewi tht hem cr ackingup.Idon' tbl amet hem t heguyswer efunny.Wesatont hecamp
chairsandl ookedatt hem, BuleandYandi saseemedt obeget ti
ngal ongpr et
tywel l
.Andt hat
mademehappy.
Zethu:Yoursi steri squi teaf l
ir
t.
Me:Hmm
Her:Don' tyout hinkshei stoocl oset oYandi sa?
Il
ookedather .
Me:Whatar eyout r
yingt osay?Thatshei sf l
irti
ngwi thhim?
Her:Yousai di tnotme.Jonga. .
.
Il
ookedatt hem, shehadherar m ar oundYandi sa'swaist.Nothingunusualaboutt hat
,Bulelwa
l
ovedl eani ngagai nstpeopl e.Onecoul dswearshecoul dn'tstandbyher self.
Her:Youdon' thol dyoursi ster'
shusbandl iket hat.
Me:Hayiwet hut hat '
showshei s,f
or everl eani ng.
Her:Event oyourhusband?Comeon!
Me:Hayiwet huZet huyi yeke.
Her:Don' tsayIdi dn'twar nyou, Iknowgi rlsl ikeher .
..
Me:Butshei sn'tl i
ket hat ,shewoul dnever .
Her:Iwasj ustsayi ngkeepacl oseeyeonher .
Me:Hayi !
Igotupandwenti nsi de, Bulelwawoul dn'tdot hat.Shewas/ ismysi ster,shewoul dneverdo
anythingt ohur tme.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Lubanzi :Soboyut hiniaboutt hehousepar tyyal ater?Yougame?
Me:Idon' tknow, Ist il
l havet ot alktomywi f
eabouti t
.
Mandl a:Youmeanaskf orherper mission?
Ichuckl edandshookmyhead, whywer et heytryingt omakei tlooklikePhumiwascont r
olling
me?Shewasn' t.
Bulelwa:I fyougoi ngcanIgowi th?
Il
ookedatherandr emovedherar m aroundmywai st.
Me:Ar en'tyout ooyoungf orpar ti
es?
Her:You' llbet her et ol ookaf termer ight?Sonot hingwi l
lhappent ome.Besi desIam abi ggi r
l,I
cant akecar eofmysel f.
Me:Ne?
Her:EweandIcant akecar eofyout oo.
Shebr ushedmychestandIchuckl ed.Bulelwawasdef init
elyaf li
rtandi fIwasn'tmar riedor
shewasn' tmywi fe'ssi st erohboy!
Me:Uhno( Iyankedherhand)Idon' twantt ogeti ntroublewi thyourpar entsoryoursi ster.
Her:Hayiwet huPhumzawontmi nd, pl
ease.Ther ewi llbeagr eatrewar dforyoui fyout akeme
withyou.
Ichuckl ed.
Me:Rewar d?
Her:Yeah, I'
llshowyout oagoodt ime.Iam notabor elikemysi ster.
Il
aughedandcl appedonce.Thi schi l
dthough!
Her:Comeon!
Me:Theansweri sst i
llno.
Bule:Ol wet hucanyout alktohi m.
Olwet hu:Comeonbhut ijustfort onight,Iam 18andshei salmost18.
Bule:Wepr omi set obehavei fyoul etuscomewi thyou.
Them:Pl ease!
Me:OkaybutIwi lltalkt omywi fef i
rst.
Bule:Thankyou!Thankyou!
Shehuggedme.
Me:Okay!
Iremovedherhandsandwentt ost andnextt oMandl a, i
tlookedl iketheki dcouldn'tgether
handsof fme.I fshewasn' tmywi f
e'ssisterIwoul dhavej umpedst raightint
obedwi thher .She
wasbeaut i
ful.
Mandl a:Shei st roubl e.
Me:Tel lmesomet hingIdon' tknowboy.
Luba:Andshewi llgetyoui ntotroubl ewi t
hyourwi fe.
Me:Boy!
Theyl aughed.Whenwewer edonewet ookt hemeati nside.ZethuandPhumzadi shedupt hen
servedever yone, theyj oinedusout sideaf t
erthat.Ispoket oheraboutt hepar tyandshedi dn't
haveapr obl em wi thmegoi ngort akinghersi st
erwi t
hme, Ijusthadt omakesur et hatshewas
safeatal ltimes.
Phumi :Don' tl
etheroutofyoursi ght.
Me:Ipr omi se.
Phumi :Thankyou.
Me:Il oveyou.
Her:Il oveyout oo.
Weshar edaki sst henIwentt ogetont hecarwi tht heboys.

13
.
.
Yandisa:
Whenwegott othepar
tyi
twasal
readypacked,
themusi
cwasboomi
ng,
andpeopl
ewer
e
al
readydrunk.
Me:Ihaveaf eel i
ngt oni ghti sgoi ngt obeepi c!
Mandl a:Youcansayt hatagai nbru, masingeneni !(
letsgoi n)
Wegotof fthecarandwal kedt ot hegat e,therewasnopar ki
ngspacei nsidet heyard.Whenwe
gott othegat eIf el
tsomeonepul li
ngme, Itur nedt olookatt heper son.Itotallyforgotabout
aboutt hiski d.
Her:RememberwhatPhumzasai d,youhavet olookaf t
erme.
Me:Noonewi llhur tyour elaxbesi desOl wethui sher e.
Her:Whi chOl wet hu?Sher anof ftoherf ri
ends.
Shehel dont omyar m, Iletherbe.
Her:I '
m scar ed.
Ichuckl ed.
Me:You?Scar ed?Pl ease!
Her:Ser iousIhaveneverbeent oapar tybefor e.
Me:Rel axmyboyswi l
ll ookaf t
eryou.
Wewal kedovert owher et heywer e.
Me:Gent s!
Wef i
stbumpedt henIi ntroducedhert omyboysandaskedt hem tokeepacl oseeyeonher .
Yongama:Wenother et obabysi t
,weher etohavef un.
Luba:Rel axI 'lllookaf terherf oryou.
Me:Shar p, see?Yousor ted.
Her:ButIwantyout ol ookaf termeandPhumzaspeci f
icall
yaskedyout olookaf terme.
Me:Okaykal ok!
Her:Wontyougetmeadr ink?
Me:I fyoul etgoofmyar m Iwi ll
.
Shegi ggl edandl etgo.SoIgotusdr inks,hunt er
sgol df orherandAmst ellagerforme.
Me:Nazo, wedon' thavej ui ce.
Her:Whowant sj uice?Iam notPhumzamnasoundi bhekekahl e.
Ichuckl edandsi ppedonmydr i
nk, i
twasgoi ngt obeal ongni ght.Iwasal readyr egretti
ng
comi ngher ewi t
hher .Isatdownwi ththegent sandr oll
edabl unt,Ineededasmoke.
Her:Yougoi ngt ol etmet r yit?
Me:No!St i
ckt oyourdr ink.
Her:Pr ettypl ease.
Me:Okay.
Afterrol l
ingi tIgavei tt oher ,shel ititandsmokedl ikeapr o.Il aughedt omysel fandr ol
led
anot heronef ormysel f.
>>Hour sl ater ..
Thepar tywasnowhot , wewer eget ti
ngcl oset ot henewyearandIwasal readyt i
psyandhi gh.
Olwet huandBul elwawer eont hedancef loordanci ngtheirli
vesawayandIwasj ustwat ching
them, Iwast iredofdanci ngpl usImi ssedmywi fe.Iwant edt ogohomet oherbutt hegi rl
s
wer estillhavi ngf unandIdi dn'twantt oruint hei
rni ght.
Mandl a:St opbei ngmi ser abl eandl etsjoi
nt hem ont hef l
oor,Chant el
lehasbeencal l
ingyouout .
Shewasher ewi thhergi r
lfriendsandof cosIdancedwi thherf orol dti
messake, itmeant
nothing.
Me:Ineedt ocal lmywi fef irst.
Mandl a:Ahh!Yousuchabor e!
Igotupandwentsear chi ngf oraqui etspot ,Iwenti noneoft heempt ybedr oomsupst ai
r s.Isat
ont hebedandt ookoutmyphonet hencal l
edmywi f
e.Shepi ckedupwhenIwasaboutt odrop
thecal l
.
Her:Qhawe?
Me:Imi ssyou.
Her:Wher ear eyou?
Me:I nsomer oom, Iwant edt ohearyourvoi ce.
Shegi ggl ed.
Her:Youdr unk?
Me:Al i
t t
le.
Her:UphiuBul el
wa?
Speakoft hedevi l!ThedoorswungopenandBul elwawal kedin, whatdi dshewant ?Shemi med
somet hi ngIcoul dn' tmakeout .
Me:BabeIwi llhavet ocal lyouback.
Shewal kedovert ot hebedandsatonmyl ap.
Her :Isever yt hingokay?
Me:YeahIl oveyou.
Her :Iloveyout oo.
Idr oppedt hecal l andl ookedather .
Me:WhatdoyouwantBul elwa?
Her :Ithi nkyouknowwhatIwant ,Iknowyouwanti ttoo.
Shet ri
edt oki ssmebutIbl ockedi t.
Me:Iam amar riedmanBul elwa.
Her :Whosai damar riedmancan' thaveabi toff un?
Ichuckl edandshookmyhead, thiski dwasunbel i
evable.Shet ookmyhandandputi tonher
l
apt henunderherdr ess.
Me:Bul elwa. ..
Sheki ssedmyneckt henpl ayedwi thmyear ,
damnt hatfeltgoodandi tdefi
nitel
ygotZi ziall
exci t
ed.
Her :Ihavecondoms.
Me:Woah!
Istoppedherandl iftedherup, Iputheront hebednextt omeandgotup.
Me:Ican' tdot his, Iam mar riedtoyoursi ster.
Her :Iknowt hatbutIf el linl ovewi thyouf i
rst.
Iputmyhandsupandwal kedt othedoor ,Icoul dn'tdealwi thahor nyt eenager.Iopenedbut
thedoorwasl ockedandt her ewasnokeyont hehandl e.Iturnedt ol ookatherandboy!Ohboy!
Ireallywi shedIhadnott urn, shewashal fnakedandl ookeddel ici
ouslysexy." Fuck"Icl osed
myeyesandt riedt oPhumza, mywi fe, ourmar riage, ourlove.
Her :St opbei ngsuchacowar dshewontknow.
Me:Opent hedoorBul elwa.
Her :Ifyouwantt ogetouther eisthekey.
Iopenedmyeyes, sheputt hekeyi nherbr a.Ichuckl edandshookmyhead, honest l
yIwant ed
to.Ir eal l
ydi dbutwhathappensaf teral loft his?Iwasgoi ngt olooseawi f
e,no!Icoul dn't.
Me:Ar eyour eal l
yt hathor nyt hatyouwantt of uckyoursi ster'
shusband?
Shegotof ft hebedandwal kedt owar dsme.
Her :Comeon, shewontknow.
Shet ookmyhandsanddi rect edthem t oherass.
Me:No!NomanBul elwat hisi syoursi st erwet alkingaboutapha!
Shedi dn' tsayanyt hi ngbuti nsteadpul ledmet owar dsthebed.
Me:Wai tyouhavepr ot ectionr i
ght?
Her :Yeah.
Inoddedandl iftedherup, Iledust ot hebedandt hrewheroni tthengotbet weenherl egs.I
kissedherneckwhi leunhooki ngherbr a, shequi cklyreachedf orthekey.It ookof fherbr aand
threwi tont hef loorbutIcoul dn'tbr i
ngmysel ft oki ssinghersoIgotof fher.
Me:Il oveyoursi ster ,Il ovemywi fe.Iwantt of uckyoubutIwon' tforthesakeofourl oveand
mar r
iage.Youdon' twantt oopent hedoor ?Fi ne!ButIwon' tfuckyou, Iwontevent ouchyouso
Isuggestyougetdr essed.
Her :You' l
lr egr ett ur ningmedown.
Shet hrewt hekeyt ome, Icaughti tandwentt ounl ockt hedoor .Iopenedandwal kedout .What
didIal mostdo?Hu- huhIhadt ogetbackt omywi febef oreIdi dsomet hingIwoul dr egret,Iran
downst airst henout side.Iwal kedupt oOl wet hu.
Me:Ol wet hugogetBul elwawegoi nghome.
Her :Why?Whathappened?Bhut i
?
Itoldhert hewhol est or yandshewenti nsi det ogethersoIl ookedf orMandl a,Iwant edhi mt o
driveusbackhome.ButasIwasl ooki ngf orhi m Ihear dnoi secomi ngf rom i
nsidet hehouse,
somewer eshout ing" fight"andt heot her swer edoi ngt hecountdown.Icoul dn'tbebot her ed
aboutt hatIj ustwant edt ogohomet omywi f
e.
.
"Haibondodayoursi steri sfight i
ngi nsi de! "
,Lubanzishout edashepul l
edme.Hu- huhwhowas
shef ight i
ngwi thngoku?Ir ani nsi dewi thhi m andt hrought hecrowd, peoplewer ewat chingt he
fi
ght .Nobodywast ryingt ost opt hem, Olwet huwasont opandpunchi ngt hepoorgi rl
.Iwentt o
pullherof fandt omysur priset hegi rlshewaspunchi ngwasmyver yownsi sterinlaw.Why
wer et heyf ightingkengoku?Ipul ledOl wet huof fBul ethenhelpedherup, shehadbl oodi nher
mout h.Maybeshebustherl i
porwhat ever .
Olwet hu:Dar emeagai n!
Me:Ol wet hu! !
Iwasn' tt het ypet oshoutandcur sei nf rontofpeopl e.
Olwet hu:I 'l
lfuckyouupmna!
Me:I nt hecar !Thebot hofyou!
IpushedOl wet huf i
rstt henBul elwa, Igotheradr inkont hewayt othecarsoshecoul drinse
hermout h.Whenwewer eallinsi det hecarMandl ast art
edtheengi neandst arteddriving.What
awayt ost artanewyear !
Me:Whatt hef uckwast hat?!Ol wet hu?
Ilookedather .
Olwet hu:He. edon' tevenshoutatme!
IlookedatBul el wa, Iwassi t
tingbet weent hem.
Me:Bul elwa? !
Bule:I tst hatwhor e!Shest artedi t.
Olwet hu:Whor e? !Fuckyou!
ShepushedmeandsmackedBul elwa' sheadandshef oughtback.Hai bowher ewast heir
respect ?Isl appedt hebot hoft hem.
Me:St opt hismadness!Whyar eyouf ight i
ng?
Olwet hu:Ist artedi talri
ghtbutbecauseIwasdef endingyouandyourmar ri
age.
Me:Huh?
Olwet hu:Shewant edt ot arnishyourr eput ati
ont oget herwi t
hyourmar r
iage.YeahIhi therf or
herbi tcht endenci es.Phumzadon' tdeser vet hi
ssoyesIwasst andi ngupf orher.
Honest lyIj ustf el tdef eat edsoIsai dnot hing.
.
Whenwegothomewegotof fandt hankedMandl a,IcalledZethut oopenf orus.Ididn'twantt o
wakeupPhumza, notwhi let her ewast hi stensionbet weent hethreeofus.WhensheopenedI
wentst raightt omyr oom, Ilockedt hedoorbehi ndmet henundr essedandgoti nbednextt o
mywi fe.
"Qhawe? "
Me:I tsmemyl ove, gobackt osl eep.
Her:Hmmm. ..
Me:Il oveyou
Shemoanedagai nsoIki ssedhert hesi deofherheadandcuddl edher .
.
.
Phumza:
Jan1st .
..
Iwokeupi nQhawe' sar ms, hewashol dingmet i
ght l
ybuthewasf latout.Iki
ssedhi sar mt hen
tri
edt obr eakoutofhi sl ockwi t houtwaki nghi m up.
Him:Uyaphi ?
Me:Ihavet owakeup, wenagobackt osl eep.
Him:Hu- huhbot hourmot her sar eher e.
Me:So?Ihavet owakeupormom wi llcal lmel azy.
Him:You' l
ltellhert hatyourhusbandal l
owsyout obel azyeveryoncei nawhi l
e.
Me:ButIr eal l
yhavet o.
Him:Hmmm. .
.
Ifli
ppedovert olookhi sdi rect ion, hewaswi deawake.
Him:Di dIt ellyout hatIl oveyou?
Me:No.
Him:Wel lIl oveyou.
Me:Il oveyou.
Him:Gi vemesomesugart henyoucangetup.
Heputhi sar m aroundmyneckt henpul ledmei nf oraki ss, weshar edashor tki ss.Hesmel tof
alcoholandi twasn' tpl easant .Inf actthewhol er oom smel tofal cohol .
Him:Il oveyou.
Me:Iknow, l
etmegetup.
Hel etgoofmesoIgotoutofbedandwentt oopent hewi ndowsf orsomef reshai r.AfterthatI
wor eagownandt ookhi scl ot hesf r
om t hef loor, Iwal kedout .Iwentt oputt hem i nt hel aundry
room andasIwaswal kingoutIbumpedi ntoBul elwacomi ngoutoft hebat hroom, somet hi
ng
wasdi f
ferentabouther .
Me:Mol o
Shei gnor edmeandwal kedpastme, whatwast hatf or ?Ishr uggedandwal kedi nt ot he
bat hroom, Ipeed, brushedmyt eet hthengotundert heshower .Aftershower i
ngwentt omy
room, Yandi sawasf latoutagai n.SoIl ot i
onedmybodyt hengotdr essedandwentoutt ocl ean.
Aftercl eani ngImadebr eakf astf orwhoevert hatwasawake, ourpar entswer eawakesoI
servedt hem t hensatdownt oeat .Aftereat i
ngmom andIdi dt hedi shes, shewaswashi ngand
Iwasr i
nsi nganddr ying.
Ma:Tel l memybaby, howi smar riaget reat i
ngyou?
Me:Not hingl ikeIi magi ned.Yandi saisagoodmanandhet reat smel i
keaqueen.Hel ovesand
respect smemama, hei spat ientwi thme.Hel aughedwi thmenotatme, hedoesn' tjudgeme
whenwegooutandIam cl uel essabouthal ft het hingsweseeordo.Hemakesmehappy, he
j
ustcompl etesme.
Her :Yousoundl i
keyouhavef alleni nl ovewi thhi m.
Me:IhavemamaandIpr ayf orourmar ri
ageever yday.
Her :Youshoul dbaby, thedevi ldoesn' twantbeaut if
ult hingssoal waysseekf orGod' s
prot ection.
Me:Ewemama.
Her :Hei sagoodmanyena, takecar eofhi m.
Me:Iwi l
lmama.
Her :Good.
Me:Howi shomengobaIdon' tl ivewi t
hyouanymor e?
Her :Isn'tnott hesameanymor e, wemi ssyouever yday.
Me:Imi ssyout oomama.
Her :AnddoyouknowwhatImi ssaboutyout hemost ?Yourbeaut ifulangelicvoi ce, yoursi st
er
can' tsingkal okyena.
Ilaughedandwecont inuedt al kingt i
llwewer edonewi ththedi shes.It hankedhert henwentt o
myr oom bumpi ngi ntoOl wet hui nt hepassage, wegr eetedeachot herandIt oldherwher eher
foodwas.Shet hankedme, sounl ikehert henwentt ot heki tchen.Iwentt ocheckonYandi sa,
wel lImi ssedhi m butIf oundhi m st il
lsl eeping.Hecoul dsl eept hewhol edayi fal coholwasi n
hissyst em.
>>2hour sl ater..
.
Bul elwawasawakeandwewer esi t
tingout si
deeat i
ngyest erday' smeat ,j
ustthet woofus.I
sensedt ensi onbet weenherandbot hofmysi ster sinlaw, Zet huwast akingthiswhol e"fli
rti
ng"
thingwayt ooser iousl y.Sheeveni nvol vedherOl wet hui nal loft his,hu-huhshewasbei ng
unf airman.
Me:Sohowwast hepar tymt ase?
Her :Yohmt aseyoumi ssedoutl astni ght ,yourhusbandcangetdown.Hehast hemovesf or
days, heywena!
Me:Ewene?
Her :Ewemt ase!Youshoul dhavebeent heret oseehi m, hewasonf ir
e.Whenhi sfavor i
tesong
cameon, aywena!
ShedancedsoIl aughed, IknewYandi sawashyperbutdanci ng?Getoutofher e!Itwasn' this
thing.
Me:That 'ssoounl ikehi m.
Her :Thencl earlyyoudon' tknowyourman.
"Shei sexagger atingmyl ove, Iam nott hatgoodofadancer "
, f
inallyhewasawake!Il ookedat
him sohepeckedmyl ips, hewasal lcleananddr essedup.Iwonderwher ehewasgoi ng.
Her :Hai bodi dyouseeyour sel font hedancef l
oorwi t
ht hatgirl?
Me:Whatgi rl?
Hepul ledmeupf rom t hechai randsatdownt henl apmeonhi sl ap.
Her :Theoneyouwer edanci ngwi th,whatwashernameagai n?Ihear dyourf r
iendssayi ngit.
Hi m:Hayi sukashei sl ying.
Her :Am I ?Ihavepi ct ur es.
Me:Hmmm. ..
IlookedatYandi sa, heshr ugged.
Her :NextyearIam def initelymovi ngher et al
kt odadf orme.Kumnandiapha!Woah!
Hi m:No!
Ilookedathi m.Iwassur pr isedathi st one.
Hi m:Imeanwher ewi llyoul ive?
Her :Wi thyouof cos.
Hi m:Youmad.
Me:ButQhawe. ..whywoul dyousayt hat?
Her :YesQhawewhy?
Hi m:Wewon' thaveenoughspacef orthet hreeofus, babepl easegogetdr essedinsomet hing
else.
Me:Wher ear ewegoi ng?
Hi m:Tot hebeachwi thMandl a,Lubanziandt heot herguys.
Me:Wi tht heboyskuphel a?
Hi m:Andt hei rgirlfri
ends.
Me:Hmmm. .Okay!
Her :CanIcomewi thyou?
Me:Qhawe?
Hi m:Butmyl oveIwantyoual l t
omysel f
.
Her :Wel eavi ngtoni ghtsoyouwi l
lhaveheral lt oyour self,Ij
ustwantt ospendt i
mewi thmy
sisterpl easeandIhaveneverbeent othesea.
Me:Pl ease.
Hi m:Hayi okay.
Me:Thankyou, letsgogetdr essed.
WegotupbutYandi sahel dmyhand.
Hi m:Hu- huhyouoweme.
Ismi ledandpeckedhi sl ipst henwenti nsidet ochange.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Isatout sidewi t
hmyf acei nmyhands, asmuchasIdi dn'twantBul elwat ocomewi thusI
coul dn'tsaynot omywi f
e.Idi dn'
twanthert ot hinkIhat edherbutt ruthf orthemat t
erwasI
hat edher ,shewasonami ssi ont odest roymymar ri
ageandmakemel ookl i
kethegui l
tyone.
Makemet akebl amef orever ythingandIcoul dn'tl etthathappen, Ijusthadt otell
Phumzat he
truthaboutl astnight .Thest upi ddancewi thChant elleandwhathappenedi nthatroom wi thher
sisterbef or eshet oldhert hatIwast heonewhomadeamoveonher .Fuck!
"Wedone, let sgo" ,Isnappedoutofi tandgotup.Wewentt omycaref ront .
Her :Ar eyouokay?
Me:I 'mf i
nemyl ove.
Her :Whydi dn'tyouj ustt el lmet hati twast hatgi rlfrom t hemal l?Chant elle.
IlookedatBul el
wa, thehel l shet oldhert hatf or?!Sheshr ugged.
Me:Yeahi twasherandi twasani nnocentdance.
Her :Iknow.
Iopenedt hedoorf orherandshegotont hencl osed.Iwentt omysi deandgoton, Istar t
edt he
engi neanddr oveout .
.
Wegott ot hebeachandpar kedt hengotof f,
itwaspackedyohandf indingoMandl aint his
crowdwasgoi ngtobehar dsoIcal l
edhim.Het oldmewher et heyweresowewal kedovert
o
them.
Me:Gentsnanil adi
es!
Them:Shoboy.
Mandla:Queenkamf ethu,howar eyou?
Phumza:I '
m goodt hanks, wena?
Mandla:Youl ookbeaut if
ul asalways,youdidn'
tmakeami stakeaphabr o.
Iknewwhathewasdoi ng.
Me:IknowmanandIam l uckyt ohaveherinmyl i
fe.
Shesmi l
ed.
Phumza:Thankyou.
Igott
hel adiesdri
nks, jui
cef ormywi feandhersisterthenbeerf orme.Isatdownandpull
ed
Phumzasoshesatbet weenmyl egs,
Bulel
wal ookedlost.Itoldhernottocomebutshe
i
nsist
edsoIdi dn'
tcar ehowl eftoutshefel
t,thi
swasacoupl e'sout i
ng.

14:
Yandisa:
13cont i
nues…
Phumza:l et stakeawal k, I’
mt i
redofsi ttingher e.
PhumiandIwer ecuddl ingont hesand, ever yoneel sewasswi mmi ngandhavingthet imeof
theirl
ives.Event hatbi tchBul elwaseemedt obehavi ngf unandher eIwasmiserableand
feeli
nggui l
ty.Gui ltybecauseIwasaboutt obr eakmywi fe’shear tabouthersister,becauseshe
hadt ochoosebet weenherbl oodandhusband.Icoul dn’tdot hat, Icoul
dn’
ttel
lhert ochoose,I
couldn’tbr eakherhear t
.Il ookedather ,arghIcoul dn’tdot his.Igotupandpul l
edherupt hen
wet ookawal kt owar dst heshor e.Ifel tat ightgr iponmyar m, Ilookedatherandsmi led.
Her:Qhawe
Me:babe?
Her:areyouokay?
Me:yeahIam okay, why?
Her:becauseyoudon’ tlookokay, youj ustnotyournor malsel f.
Me:andwhat 'smynor mal sel f?
Her:Tal kative,al wayscr acki ngj okesandl aughi ng.
Me:Iam j ustt iredbabe, don’ twor r
yaboutme.
Her:Icannotnotwor ryaboutyou, letsgohomesoyoucanr est .
Me:butyoursi sterl ooksl i
keshei shavi ngf un.
Her:yeahbutshewi llunder st and.Imeanyouwer ealloutt il
llatemaybeshei salsot i
red.
IlookedatBul elwa, theki dwashyperandener get i
c.
Me:Ti red?Butshedoesn' tlookl ikeit,sheact uallylooksf resh.
Her:That '
sBul el waf oryou.
Me:SobabyIwast hi nkingt hatwet ellourf ami lythatwear emovi ngout.
Her:Wehaven' tevenf oundaf l
att hough.
Me:Iknowbutwewi ll,i
tsonl yamat teroft i
mebef oreal lthishol idayexcit
ementwi lldiedown.
Peoplewi l
lgobackt owher evert heycamef rom, wewi llgetanapar t
ment.
Her:Somet hingbi g,twobedr ooms.
Me:Twobedr oomsf orwhat ?
Her:Andi t
hi Bul elwawi l
lmovei nwi thus.
Iscratchedmyhead.
Me:It houghtIsai dno.
Her:Whynot ?Youknowshei smyonl ysi sterandbestf ri
end.
Me:Shewon' tbemovi ngi nwi t
husf inishandkl aar!
Her:Butshei sf ami l
y.
Me:Yoursi steri st r
oubl eandmnaandi vaninomt uonjal o.
Her:Whatdi dshedo?
Me:Not hing, Ijust ..
.
Iwasi nt err
upt edbyBul elwashout ing.
"Phumza! "
, sher anovert ous.
Me:I '
ll giveyouspace.
Her:Thi si snotover .
Me:Yeahyeahwhat ever,later !
Igavet hem spaceandwentt oj oint heguys, theywer edoneswi mmi ng.Wechi l
ledandspoke,
tookpi ctur es, cr ackedaf ewj okes.Theyact uallycheer edmeup.Anywaywheni twasget ti
ng
l
ateIt ookmywi feandBul elwahome.Bul elwaact ual l
yapol ogizedf orlastni ght,shecal l
edme
tothesi deandsheseemedsi ncer esoIaccept edherapol ogyandweagr eedt hatitwoul d
neverhappenagai n.Andt hathersi st erwoul dn' thearabouti t
, Iwasj ustgl adIdi dn'thavet o
breakherhear t
.
.
WhenwegothomeBul elwahadt opackf astbecauset hei rparent swer el eaving.Whi leshe
wentt opackPhumiandIsatourpar entsdownt ogi vethem t hegoodnews.
Me:Wemovi ngout .
Mom:What ?When?
Me:Assoonaswef indaf lat.
Mom:Af lat ?Whywoul dyoumovei nt oaf latwhenyouhaveahome?
Me:Mamai tsj ustf ornowt illwebackonourf eetandr eadyt obuyahouse.
Dad:That 'sgoodnewsson, yougr owi ng.
Mom:Youencour agi nghi m?Theyst illyoung, theyneedourgui dance.
Dad:No, youj ustwantt ohol dont ot hisboy.Youhavet ol ethi m grow.
Fatheri nl aw: CanIsaysomet hing?I tsagoodi deaf orthem t omoveout .Theywi l
lfigureout
l
ifetoget her ,
r ememberweal sohadt ogot hrought hesamet hingandher ewear e.
Dad:Exact ly.
Mom Idon' tknow, I'
llthinkabouti t.UYandi sawam i sstillababy.
Me:I tsnot hingt ot hinkaboutmama, wehavemadeupourmi nds.Wemovi ngoutassoonas
wef indaf lat.
Mom:Wegoi ngt ot alkaboutt hismadnessyakhol ater,youri nlawsar eleaving.
Me:Ni zohambakahl et atanomama.
Them:Si bongi l
enyana, l
ookaf terourbaby.
Iturnmyar m ar oundher .
Me:Shewi llbepr oper l
yl ookedaf tert ata.
Mot heri nl aw:Loveeachot her ,yes?
Wesmi l
ed.
Us:Yesma.
Her:Okayt hen, Phumimt am gogetyoursi sterf orme.Wehavet obeonourwaynow.
Phumi :Yesma.
Shepul l
edmewi thherbutIwentt oourr oom i nst eadofOl wethu' sroom.It hrewmysel font he
bedandcl osedmyeyes.
.
IguessIf el lasl eepbecauseIwokeupwhenIf eltcol dlipst owar dsmyneck, Iopenedmyeyes
tomywoman.Shewasont opofme.
Her:Heybabe
Ismi ledandwr appedmyar msar oundherwai st.
Me:St handwasam
Shepeckedmyl ips.
Her:Yourdi nneri sr eady.
Me:WasIoutf ort hatlong?
Her:Andyoul ookedsopeacef ul.
Me:Thenwhydi dyouwakemeuphmm?
Her:Because( sheki ssedmyneck)I( sheki ssedmyf orehead)mi ssed(sheki ssedmynose)
you...
Sheki ssedmyl ips, Ikissedherbacki mmedi atel ybutshebr okei t.
Me:Yout easi ngmenow?
Shegi ggl edandgotof fme.
Me:Babe. .
..
Isatup.
Her :Yourf ood.
Shehadat rayi nherhands.Sheser vedmewi thsomuchr espect ,l
ikeIwast hemostimportant
persononear t
h.
Me:Youspoi lme.
Sheputt het raydown.
Her :MaybeIshoul dst op, here. ..
Shegavemeahandnapki nsoIwi pedmyhands.
Me:Youwoul dn'tdare.
Igavei tbackt oher ,shegavememyf ood.
Her :Don'tpushi t.
Ichuckl ed.
Me:Thankyoumyl ovebutcanyoudomej ustonef avor .
Her :Iam al l ears.
Me:Don' tleaveme, inf actIwoul dlikeyout ofeedme.
Her :Youpushi ngi tkengoku.
Me:Pl ease. ..
Shegotont hebedandcr ossedherl egsthent ookt hepl atefrom me.Shescoopedt hefoodand
fedme.
Me:Omamaar et heygoneyet ?
Her :It
'sbeenhour snow, Icamei nt ogetyoubutyouwer esleeping.
Me:IguessIwasr eallyt ired.
Her :Nodoubtaboutt hat ,sot ellmeaboutt hepar ty...
Iclearedmyt hroat.
Me:Whatabouti t?
Her :Howwasi t
?WasBul elwaonherbestbehavi our ?Whathappenedt oherl owerli
p?
Me:Idon' tknow, Iwasn' tpayi ngmuchat tenti
ont oher .
Her :OhbecauseofChant elle?
Me:No, babe. ..Hu-huhbaby.
Shel aughed.
Her :Whatar eyoul aughi ngat ?
Me:Youshoul dhaveseenyourf aci alexpressionwhenIment ionedChant elle'sname,Bulewas
l
yingt herewer enopi ctur es.
Ifakedasmi le,angat hiIwasgoi ngt ogett i
redofhear ingBul elwa'snameever y5seconds.We
cont i
nuedt alkingaboutnot hingr eally.
.
.
Phumza:
Afterfeedi nghi m Igotof ft hebedandwentt otheki t chent owasht hedishes.Af t
erwashing
them Iwentf oraqui ckshowerandgotr eadyf orbed.Thenaf terallthatIgoti nbednexttomy
stronghusband, sheputhi sar m ar oundmeandwef ellasleepi mmedi atel
y
.
Whenmor ningcameIwokeupear lyasusualandwentt oclean, didthewashi ngandtookitout
.
Ihangedi tt henwentbacki nt ohaveashowert henImadebr eakfast,Iservedeveryonesince
theywer eal l awake.Af t ereat ingIdi dt hedishest henwentt omyr oom t omaket hebed.AsI
wasst i
llbusyYandi sacamei nt otel lmet ogetr eady, wewer egoi ng" house"hunt i
ng.SoIjust
changedi nt oapai rofbl ackj eans, gr eenvestandsandal s.Ist yl
edmyhai rthenwentt o
Olwet hu'sr oom, Iknockedont hedoorandopenedwhenshecal l
edmei n.
Me:Hey, youbusy?
Her :Nopenotr eady,whatdoyouwant ?
Me:Wegoi ngt ocheckoutaf ewf l
at sandIwant edt ol ookbeaut i
ful.
Her :Sowhatshoul dIdor eally?
Me:Ar ghf or getIasked.
Shewasj ustunnecessar ilyr ude.
Her :SorrymanIam j ustst ressedaboutt her esults,si tdown.
Isatdownont hebedandshest arteddoi ngmyf ace.
Me:Iam sur eyoupassed.
Her :I
fyouknewhowmuchIwasst rugglingwi t hmygr adesyouwoul dn'tbesayi ngt hat.
Me:I '
m sur eyouwer en'tallbad.
Her :Huh!Askbhut i
,hewi l
ltellyou.
Me:Wel lIbel ievei nyou.
Her :Hmmm. .
.Youhaveaver ybeaut if
ulhear t.
Me:Okay?Whatdi dIdot odeser vet hiscompl iment ?
Her :Sinceyougother eIhavebeenr udet oyoubutyoust il
lforgiveandt alkt omeast hough
nothinghashappened.
Me:BecauseIcanthol dgr udgesandIl ovemyhusband' sfami lyast houghi ti smi ne.
Her :Hmm hei sr eallyl uckyt ohaveyou.
Me:Iam t hel uckyone.
Her :Hmmm. .
.Whyar eyousoi nahur ryt ogetoutofher e?
Me:Ohwenoti nahur ry,Qhawei sgoi ngbackt owor knextweekandwebot hknowhowbusy
heget s.Pl ushewi l
lbeoutoft ownf orthewhol emont h.
Her :Shameyoupoort hing...Iam doneher e.
Sheputhersetdownt henr emovedt hecl othsheputovermy" cleavage" .Idi dn'thavel arge
boobs, IwasanAsi ze.
Me:Thankyou.
Her :Ther ei ssomet hi ngmi ssingher e,yima.
Shel ookedf orsomet hingi nherdr awer sandt ookoutaneckl ace.
Her :Askyourhusbandt obuyyousomet hingl ikethis, Iam notgi vingi ttoyoubutbor r
owi ngi t
toyou.
Ishookmyheadassheputi taroundmyneck, onemi nut eOlwet huwaschi lledandt heot her
shewasj ustact i
ngl ikeabi tch.Icoul dn'tunder st
andhershame.Anywayshest yledmyhai r,
whenshewasdoneIt hankedherandgotup.Ir eturnedt omyr oom, Yandi sawasr eadysowe
tookwhatwewer egoi ngt oneedandwentoutt oourcar .
.
Thewhol edaywewer ebusychecki ngoutr ent alflat
s.At2: 00Yandi sacl ai medt obet ir
edand
hecoul dn' tormaybehej ustdi dn'twantt odr i
vear oundandseeanymor ef lats.Soset tledf ora
twobedr oom, 1bat hand1gar ageapar t
menti nSt ellenbosch.Wel lthat '
st heonl yoneYandi sa
"l
oved"outoft woot herpl aceswewentt osee.Tohi mt heyalll ookedt hesamesoi twasei ther
thisoneorhi spar ent s' houseandIchooset heapar tment( thoughIwoul dhavel ovedt osee
mor e), i
twasbeaut i
ful andf ullyfurnishedsowecoul dmovei nassoonasal easecont ractwas
signed.Andwecoul dsi gnitbyt omor rowi fwewer ehappywi thit.
Yandi sa:Oht hankyoul ady, I'l
lwai ttohearf rom you.
Landl ady: Not hankyouandIwi llgiveyouacal lfirstthingtomor rowmor ningsoyoucanr ead
andsi gnt hecont r
acti fyouar ehappy.
Yandi sa:Wel lwear ehappywi t
ht heapar t
mentsoIdon' tthinkwewi llhaveapr obl em wheni t
comest osi gni ng.
Landl ady: Isur ehopeso, thankyou.
Yandi sanoddedt hent ookmyhandandwewal kedt owher ewewer epar ked.Wegotont hecar
andhest ar tedt heengi ne.
Yandi sa:Ar eyousur eyouhappyabouti t?
Me:Yeahi tsbeaut iful.
Him:Buti tdoesn' tcompar et oyou.
Me:Ncoooh!
Hel aughed.
Him:Iam hungr y, yonkel entomademehungr y.
Me:Met oo.
Him:LunchatWi mpyorMug&Bean?
Me:Idon' tknowasl ongasIwasbef ull
.
Him:Mug&Beani tist hen.
Hedr oveust her e.
.
Aftereat i
ngheset tl
edt hebi llthenwegotupandwentt oaf ur nit
ur eshopt obuyabed.The
onlyt hingt hatt heapar tmentwasmi ssingwasabedandt vsowhenwegotabedwewentt o
Gamef orabi gLGf l
atscr een.Hepai dcashf orallt
hoset hi
ngst hencal ledhi sfather,hehada
vankal ok.Hepr omi sedt obeher eint henext30mi nutessowewai tedbygoi ngshoppi ngfor
clothes,wedi dn'tneedal ltheotherthingsl i
kespoonsandpl ateswegott hem aspr esentson
ourweddi ngdaysowewer egoingt ot akethem
>>30mi nuteslater
Theguysf r
om thef urnitureshophel pedust i
ethebedont hevant henwegoti nt hevan,his
fatherwasdr i
vingYandi sa'scar.Whenwegott ohomehej ustpar kedt hevani nt hegarage
thenwegotof fandwentt othelounge.
Yandi sa:Wef oundaf l
atandwemovi ngoutt omor r
ow.
Mama:Wer eyouser iousna?
Yandi sa:Yesmawhywoul dwej okeaboutt hat ?
Tata: Theyneedt heirprivacyandf r
eedom.
Yandi sa:Yep!
Mama:Butbaby. ..
Yandi sa:Ha.aIam notyounganymor emama.Andmai t
snotl i
kewemovi ngtoanot hercit
y,we
notmovi ngtoanot herci ty.Wejustmovi ngahourdr i
veawayf rom her e, youcanvi sitwhenever
youwantt o.
Me:Ewemama.
Mama:Thi sisallyourf aultsoungal inge!
Yoh!
Yandi sa:HayimamaIam t heonewhowant edust omove, ifitwasupt oherngabewenot
movi ngout .
Mama:Ij ustfeellikeIam l osingmyson.
Yandi sa:Younotmama.
Hegotupandwentt osi tnexttoher ,hehuggedher .Igotupandwentt ot hekitchent ostar
t
cooking.

15
Phumza:
Thef oll
owi ngdayIwokeupear l
ytodot heusualthenwentt ohaveabathanddr essedina
l
ongdr ess.
Yandi:Youshoul dstartpacki ngbecausewhenIcomebackwemovi ngout.
Inodded.
Him:OkayIl oveyou.
Me:Il oveyou.
Webabyki ssedt henhet ookhi scarkeysandwal letthenwalkedout.Ist
artedpacki
ng
everythingt hat" saidus"i nt hatroom,leavingt hewor noutthi
ngskuphela.AsIwasst i
llbusy
mymot heri nl awwal kedi n,Istoppedpacki ngandl ookedather.
Her:What 'st her ush?Youcan' ttakemysonawayf r
om mepl ease.
Me:MamaIam nott akinghi m awayfrom you.
Her:Youar e, hewasn' tsupposedt omoveout .Thisishishome, hi
sinheri
tance.
Me:AndIam notdi sputingt hat.
Her:Thent el lhim nott omoveout .
Me:Ican' t,Idon' tobject ,Ifoll
owandsuppor thim.That '
smydut yashiswife.
Her:Ijustf eell i
kesomet hingbadi sgoingtohappent ohi m,t
hepacehei smovingin..
.Ican'
t
helpbutf eelscar ed.
Me:Mama. ..
Shet ookbot hmyhands.
Her:Takecar eofhi m, verygoodcar eofhim hei sst i
l
lmybaby.
Me:Iwi llmama, Ipromi se.
Her:Feedhi m wel l
.
Inodded.
Her:Okayt hen, Iguessyouhavemybl essing.
Me:Thankyoumama, Iwi lll
oveandt akecar eofhi m.
Weshar edaqui ckhug.
Her:Needhel ppacki ng?
Me:I fyoudon' tmi nd.
Shesmi l
ed.
Her :Of cosnot ,hehast ofindyour eadyr ight ?
Ismi ledsoshehel pedmepack, shewasn' thappyabouti tthoughbecauseshekepton
compl aining.Sayi ngt hati twassuddennj eweshoul dhavewai t
edf oramont hatleast.Shame
sher eal l
ydi dn' twanthersont omoveoutbutatl eastwewer en'tmovi ngoutoft ownsot hey
coul dst i
llseehi m asmuchast heyl ikeunl ikemeandmypar ent s.
.
WhenYandi sacamebackourbagswer er eadysohel oadedt hem ont hevant ogetherwithour
kit
chenut ensi l
s.Andwesai dbyet ohi sf ami l
ythengotonandof fwewentt oournewhome,
picki ngupMandl aonourwayt her et ohel pus.Whenwegott her ewegotof fandof f
loaded
thent heyt ookever ythi ngupt oourapar tment ,
theysetupever ythingwhi leIunpackedt he
kit
chenut ensi l
sandaddedaper sonal toucht ot hepl acet omakei tfeelmor eli
kehome.
>>Ahourl ater
Yandi sa:Il ovei t
, wenababeut hi ni?
Hepul ledmebymyar m andputhi sar m ar oundme.
Me:Il ovei ttoo, especi all
ywi tht hi ssetup.
Yandi :Youhadt ochangeever ythi nghuh?
Me:Ewet omakei tbeaut iful.
Yandi :Wel li
tdoesn' tcompar et oyou.
Ismi ledandl ookedathi m, heki ssedmyf or ehead.
Mandl a:Okaybef oreyouguysbecomeal lloveydoveyl etsgoeat ,I'
m hungr y.
Yandi :Babe?
Me:Nam.
Yandi :Okayt hen, let sgo.
Het ookoutkeysandwentdownst airs, locki ngthedoorbehi ndus.
Me:Wher ear ewegoi ngt oeat ?
Mandl a:Spur !
Yandi :HayiIdon' tliket hatpl ace.
Mandl a:Wenotgoi ngt oWi mpyf or geti t!
Yandi :Mug&bean.
Mandl a:Ha. ano!
Yandi :Babe?
Me:Mug&beani sf ine.
Yandi :Iyakubet hai vot eboy!
Mandl a:Hayi suka!Weshoul dbeevenandi thiyouguysar eone?
Wel aughedathi m.
Yandi :Yeahbutst i
llyououtnumber ed!
.
Wegott ot hemal l,par kedt hengotof f.Wewal kedi nsi deandt oM&B, wewer eshownt oatable
andgi venmenus.Wel ookedt hr ought hem, Yandi sast il
lor deredf ort hebot hofus.Itrusted
him, hischoi cewasal wayst hebest .ButIwassl owl yadapt i
ngt ot hisl if
e,itwasdi f
ferentkona
butIl ovedi t
.Anywaywhenwewer er eadyt oor derMandl acal ledoverourwai tr
ess,wepl aced
ouror der sandwai tedbyt al kingnj e.Theywer etal kingaboutt her esultsandaski ngwhatIwas
planni ngondoi ngt hi syear ,Idi dn' thaveananswert ot hat.Iwassor tofwai ti
ngforYandi sato
tellmewhatIwasgoi ngt odoandIwasgoi ngt oobey.15mi nutesl aterthewai tr
essbr ought
ourf oodsowest artedeat i
ng.Af tereat i
ngt heyset tledt hebilljoint l
yt henwegotupandwent
toMi lkylanef oricecr eam, t
henwedr ovehome.Wedr oppedof fMandl aathi shouset henwent
tof etchYandi sa' scar ,wet hankedhi sf atherf orl endi ngushi svant henwedr ovetoourpl ace.
.
Whenwegott her eIwentt oourbedr oom t ost artunpacki ngourcl othes.AsIwasst il
lbusyI
feltYandi sahuggi ngmef rom behi nd, kissingmynecki nt hepr ocess.
Me:Hmm Yandi saIam ki ndofbusyapha.
Him:Doyouhavet odot hisnow?
Me:Ij ustwantt ogeti toutoft heway.
Him:Wel lIwast hinki ngwedosomet hingel se.
Me:Somet hingl ike?
Het ur nedmear ound.
Him:Somet hingl i
ket his.
Heki ssedmyneck, traci nghi st onguet omyeart henpl ayedwi thi t.Sendi ngsensat ionsal lover
mybody, especi al l
ymyvj ay.Ipul l
edhi sfaceandpassi onat elyki ssedhi sl i
ps, Iwant edhi m as
i
nl ikeyest erday.Wel iter all
yr ippedof feachot her s'clothes, hepul ledmet othewal landki ssed
meal lt hewaydownt omybel lybut ton.Hewentdownonhi skneesandopenedmyl egs
put t
ingoneoverhi sshoul der ,hei nt r
oducedhi stonguet omyvj ay.Ihel dhi sheadandpushedi t
,
thiswast otallyf oreignt omeandIwasn' tsur ei fIwasgoi ngt ol i
kei t
.Hehel dbot hmyhands
andki ssedmydownt her e,Icoul dn'thel pbutmoan.I tjustf eltsoogoodespeci al
lywhenhe
stucki nhi stongue, twi st edandt urnedi tinme.If el tli
keIwasl oosi ngmymi nd, myhandswer e
onhi sheadpushi nghi m deeper .Mymoanshadt ur nedt oscr eami ng, Ifeltli
kecr yingt hewayI
feltamazi ngngakhona.Icoul df eelmycl imaxbui ldingandt ear sst reami ngoutofmyeyes, how
coul di tbesoweak?Hest oppedandgotupt henl iftedmeup.Iwr appedmyl egsar oundhi s
wai st,Zi zifoundhi swayi nandhef uckedme( excuset hel anguage)sohar dt hatithur t.Funny
enoughIl ovedever ybi tofi t
, heputmedownandt urnedmyf aceagai nstt hewal l,pul li
ngmy
wai stt owar dshi m.Hei nser tedhi msel fandpoundedmer eal l
yf ast ,spanki ngmyassl ightly.
Wedi dn' tstopatt hat ,hepul ledmet ot hebedwher eIr odehi m. .
..
Idon' tknowhowweendedupont hef loorbutIr ememberpounci ngupsanddownhi s
manhoodl ikemyl ifedependedoni ttillwebot hcame.Weshar edaki ssashor tkiss.
Him:Thatwast hebestsexIhaveeverhad.
Igiggl edshyl y.
Him:Whowoul dhavet houghtt hatyouwer et hiswi ldt i
gress?
Me:Ohgoshst op. ..
Him:Il ikei t
.
Icover edhi seyeswi thmyhands, Iwasf eelingal i
ttleshy.Heshookhi sheadandl aughed.
Him:Lookatyoul ooki ngal lshyandi nnocentbutwebot hknowhowdi rt
yyoucanget .
Me:Awucomeon!
Hel aughedandpul ledapi l
lowandbedcoverf rom t hebedt henputt hem ont hef l
oor .He
pul l
edmeof fhimt hensl eptonhi sback, Isl eptnextt ohim andr est edmyheadonhi schest .
Hewr appedhi sar m ar oundmywai standki ssedmyf orehead.
Him:Il oveyouMr sDl ami ni.
Me:AndIl oveyou.
Ikissedhi schi nandcl osedmyeyes.
Him:Hu- huhpapaubat lasomemor e.
Me:Notnow, Iwantt osl eep.
Oner oundwi thhi m wasdr ainingenough, ebendi phosal enal elomt u.
Him:Iwantmor eofyourwi l
dness. ..
Heki ssedmyneck.
Me:Ha. a
Igavehi m mybackandputmyl egoverhi s, hei nser t
edhi msel fandwej ustmadel azyl ove...
Youj ustcan' tescapeast all
ion.
.
Iwaswokenupbynoi se, i
twascomi ngf rom t hef ront.Ist r
et chedmysel fandr ealisedt hatI
wasal lal oneonbed, Icoul dn' tevenr ememberhowIgotoni t.Ilookedf ormyphoneont he
sidet abl et ocheckt het ime, i
twasexact l
yat00: 00.Hmm Igotoutofbedandpul ledt hecover ,
wr appi ngi taroundme.ThenIwentt ot hef rontst ar ti
ngi nthebat hroom t opee, Iwashedmy
handst henwentt ot hef ront.Yandi sawasmaki nghi msel fasandwi ch,hesmi ledwhenhesaw
me.
Him:Hungr y?
Me:Yeah.
Him:Iam notsur prisedaf teral lthatexer cise.
Iwal kedovert owher ehewas, ohmyGodt hi sguy!Hewasbut tnaked.
Me:Ha. aQhawecoul dn' tyouwearsomet hi ng?
Hechuckl edandgavemeagl assofmi lk.
Him:Don' tyouj ustl ovet hevi ew?
Ihithischestandweshar edal augh.
Me:Yousost upi dt hough.
Hesmi ledandl i
ftedmeup, heputmeont heki tchencount er.Hestoodbet weenmyl egsand
weshar edashor tkisst henat et oget her .Aftereat i
ngwewentt ocuddl eont hecouchovera
romant iccomedy.
.
Mor ning. .
.
Iwokeupar ound7, Yandi sawasst illsleeping.Igotoutofbedandwor eagownt henwentt o
thefront .Icl eanedl astni ght 'smesst henmadebr eakfast ,Iwast r
eatinghi mt obr eakfastinbed.
Idecidedt omakehi m somet hi ngdi fferent,fruitsal adandyoghur tne-orangej ui
ce.Hewasst i
ll
sleepingwhenIgott oourbedr oom soIputt het rayont heempt ybedsi dethenwokehi m up.
Him:Hmm?
Me:Br eakf asti sr eady.
Hesatupandr ubbedhi seyes.
Him:Mor ning.
Me:Mor ningmyl ove.
Webabyki ssedt henIgotont hebedandt ookaf ork.Ipokedast r
awber ry.
Me:Openyourmout h.
Hedi dasIt ol dhi m soIf edhi m.
Him:Icoul dgetusedt ot hi s.
Me:What ?
Him:Youf eedi ngmei nbedever ymor ning.
Me:Uhmm. ..
Het ookt hesamef orkandf edme.
Him:Sobabet ellme, whatdoyouwantt odowi thyour sel f?
Ishrugged.
Me:Whatdoyoumean?
Him:Nowt hatyoudonewi thmat ricyoumustwantt odosomet hing,maybest udyorf indaj ob.
Itookt hegl assofj uiceandgavei ttohi m,het ookasi pt henputi tdown.
Me:Wel lIam al readydoi ngsomet hing.
Him:Andwhat '
st hat ?
Me:Taki ngcar eofmyhusband.
Hesmi ledandpeckedmyl ips.
Him:AndIappr eciatei tbutwhataboutwhenIam backatwor k?
Me:I '
lljustsi ther eandwai tf oryou, makesur et hatyoual wayscomebackt oawar m home.A
homecookedmealandl ovi ngwi fe.
Him:AndIwoul dl ovet hatbutyoucan' tbeahousewi fe,ImeanIdon' twantahousewi fe.Idon't
wantyout obeahousewi fe, Icoul dhaveeasi lygotmysel famai difthatwast hecase.
Ilaughedatt hemai dpar t.
Me:Hmm?
Him:Idon' twantyout odependonmeandIdon' twantyout osithereal ldayi twi
lldriveyou
crazy.Andwhenyoucr azy, you' llalsodr ivemecr azy.
AgainIl aughed.
Me:Sowhatar eyousayi ng?Ishoul df indaj ob?
Him:Wi thamet riccer tificat e?Andwhatj obi st hat?
Me:Idon' tknowmaybeasacashi erorsomet hing.
Him:NoIdon' twantmywi f et owor klikeasl avet hengetpai dpeanut s,you'llgobackt oschool
andf urtheryoureducat ion.
Me:ButIdi dn'tappl yatanyt er ti
ar yi nstituti
ons.
Him:Whynot ?
Me:Becausedadsai dIshoul dn' t
, Iwasgoi ngt obeahousewi f
eanyway.
Hechuckl ed.
Him:OhmyGod!ourpar ent sar ej ustsool df ashi oned.ButIdon' twantyouasahousewi feI
am sur et hat 'snothowyoui magi nedyourl if
e.AndIt hinkyouwer emi sled,Ilovean
i
ndependentwoman, ambi tious, whoknowswhatshewant sinlif
eandwor kshar dt owards
achievingi t.Don' tyouwantt obet hatwoman?
Me:Thatwasmeunt ildadsai dyouwant edsomeonewhowasgoi ngtobeahousewi f
eand
startaf amilywi thyoui mmedi ately.Ial
wayst houghtt hatIwasgoi ngt obui l
dmysel ff
ir
stthen
maybegetmar riedlaterandt henbui ldaf amily.
Him:Af ami l
yr ightnow?Iam f inewi thjustus, wecanhaveki dslater
.FornowIwantyout odo
somet hingwi t
hyourgr ades,atleastbeaneducat edhousewi fe.Whatdi dyouwantt ostudy?
Me:Ci vilengineer ing,Iloveit.
Him:Ohwow, i
tsagoodcour se.Sonextyearyougoi ngtoschoolt ofurtheryourst udi
es,I'
l
lpay
forthem i fIhavet o.
Ismi ledandgavehi m ahug, IjustthoughtIwast hel uckiestpersonever.
Me:OhmyGod!Thankyou.
Him:DoyouknowwhyIdon' twantyout obeahousewi fe?
Ibroket hehugandl ookedathi m.
Him:Webui l
di ngal ifetogether,nooneshoul df eelthattheyhavet osacr i
ficesomuchf orthe
otherorevendependont heotherper sonf oreverything.Idon'twantyout of eell
it
tl
e.Andifwe
aregoi ngt osacr ifi
cet henitsnotgoi ngt obeourdr eams, youwantsomet hi ngtoyourname
ri
ght ?Iwantt hesamef oryou.Idon' twantt otakeawayyourdr eams.Iwantyout obewhat ever
youal wayswant edt obe, beadoct or,
engineer ,
lawyerwhat everyouwant .Justnota
housewi f
e.
Ikissedhi m.
Me:Youdon' tknowhowhappyIam r i
ghtnow.
Him:AndIpl ant okeepyouhappy.
Me:Ohyeah?
Him:AndIknowj usthowt o.
Igiggl edashepushedmeonmybackt hengotbet weenmyl egs,weshar edaki ssashe
i
nser tedhi msel f.
..
.

16
Phumza:
Wespentt henextcoupl eofdaysi ndoor smaki ngupf ort hehoneymoonweneverhad, getti
ng
toknoweachot herandal somaki ngupf ort het imewewer egoi ngtospendapar t
.Hewas
l
eavi ngforPr et
oriathisFr idayforsomeconst ructionpr oject,hewasgoi ngtobeawayf orthe
whol emont hormor eandboywasIgoi ngt omi sshi m.Ial readymi ssedhim andhewasst i
ll
ri
ghtbymysi de.Thinkingabouti tnjealoneupsetme, howwasIgoi ngtosurviveawhol e
mont hwi t
houthi m?
.
ThedaywasaFr idayandwewer einourr oom packi nghi sbag, hewaschoosi ngcl othesthat
hewasgoi ngt otakewi t
hhi m andIwasf oldingt hem int oabag.
Him:IaskedOl wet hutocomel i
vewi t
hyouf oracoupl eofdays, ti
llIcomeback.
Hehandedmehi sclothes, Itookt hem andputt hem ont hebed.
Me:UOl wet hu?Yoursi ster ?
Him:Yeah, Idon'twantyout ol i
veal one.
Me:Andyout houghtshewasabet teroption?Wher ewi llshesl eep?
Theot herroom wasempt y,itdi
dn'thaveabed.
Him:Yeahshei smysi ster.Youcanshar eourbed.
Me:Butwedon' tevengetal ongnoOl wethu.
Him:Iknowt hatandIt hinkyoushoul duset hist imet obond, bui l
dar el
ati
onshi p.
Me:Youmeanki l
leachot her?
Hel aughedandgavemehi st oi
letri
es.
Him:Gi veherachance, shei sn'
tthatbad.Rude?Yeah, youj usthavet oignoreherwhenshe
startsyonkel entoyakhe.
Me:Nott of orgetlazy.
Him:Atl eastyou' l
lsti
llhavesomeonet ocl eanaf ter.
Me:It houghtIwassupposedt otakeabr eakf rom t hatseei ngthatwenayouwontbear ound.
Hewasnotdi ff
erenttoal it
tl
echi l
d, Ihadt ocl eanaf terhi m allt
het i
me,tel
lhim nott oleavethe
toil
etseatuporwet .
Him:Butyou' l
lmi ssmeandcl eaningaf terme.
Me:Maybe. ..
Hepul ledmet ohi mf orahug.
Me:St oporIwi llcry.
Him:ThenIwi llcr ywi thyou.
Ismiledandl ookedupathi m, heki ssedmyf oreheadt henl i
ps.Justapeck.
Him:Let sf i
ni shpacki ngt henwecanf etchOl wet hu.
Me:Youcangof etchher ,I'l
lfinishupher e.
Him:Yousur e?
Me:Weal mostdoneher e, sogoal one.
Him:Comeher e.
Weshar edaki sst henhet ookhi skeysandwal kedout .Ifi
nishedpacki nghisbagthenwentto
watcht vi nt hel ounge.
.
.
Yandisa:
Igothomeandpar kedt hencal ledMandl atot ellhi
mt hatIwasathomesoheshoul dmeetme
ther
e.Hewasgoi ngt odr i
vemeandOl wet hubackt ot hef lat(Iwasleavingmycarathomewi th
dad)thendr ivemet ot heai r
por t.Aftertalkingt ohim Igotof fandwenti nsi
de,mom was
watchingt vi nt hel ounge.
Me:Mol weniekhaya
Mom:Mol onyanaawusemhl e.
Me:That '
sbecausemywi fetakesver ygoodcar eofme.
Mom:Oh!
Me:Wher ei sOl wet hu?
Mom:I nherr oom, Olwet hu!Yourbr otheri sher e!Sitdown.
Isatdown.
Me:Anddad?Uphi ?
Mom:Atwor kuyamaziut atakho, hei sawor kahol i
c.
Me:Iguessi tst ruewhatt heysay, anappl edoesn' t.
..
Mom:Fal lfarf rom t het ree,it
st rue.Ndi bonaaphakuni .
Ismiled.
Me:MamacanIaskf oraf avor ?
Her:Yes.
Me:Lookaf termywi fe.
Her:Howwhenshei snotevenher e?
Me:Cal lt ocheckuponherever yoncei nawhi l
eandi fsheneedsanyt hingpleasemakesure
sheget si t.
Her:Nopr obl em.
Me:Thankyoumamam.
Her:Youcanal wayscountonme, Olwet hu!
"Hahumama, Iwasst il
lpacki ng" ,shesai dwal kingintot hel oungewi t
habag.
Mom:Hai boyourbr otherhast ogokal oku.
Me:Iam st i
llwai ti
ngf or...
Iwasdi sturbedbymyphoner inging.
Me:Speakoft hedevi l
.
Igotupandwentout sidet ochecki fhewasher ealready, hehadj ustpul l
edupoutsi
dethegate
thengotof f
.
Me:Thatwasf ast !
Him:Youknowwer oll.
Me:Letmej ustpar kt hensi ngahamba.
Him:I'l
l wai t.
Iparkedmycari nt hegar aget henwenti nt of etchOl wet hu.
Me:Ma- OlOll etsgo.
Shegotupatt hesamet imeasmom.
Mom:You' llhaveasaf et r
ipkebaby.
Me:Thankyoumama.
Mom:Cal lmeassoonasyoul and.
Me:Iwi l
lmama.
Mom:Il oveyou.
Me:AndIl oveyout oo.
Weshar edahugt henIt ookOl wethu' sbag, mom wal kedusout .Iopenedt hedoorforOwet hu,
shegotonandIgaveherherbag.Ir anbacki nsidetheyar dtogivemom ahugandki ss.
Mandl a:Mama' sboy!
Mom:Hayil etmysonbewena!Il oveyoubaby.
Me:Il oveyout oomama.
Ikissedherf oreheadt hepeckedherl i
ps, ofcosIst i
llkissedmymom l ikewhenIwasj ustfour
yearsol d.Iwasst il
lmymot her'sbaby.
Mom:Okaykeboy.
Igavehermycarkeyst henwentt ogetont hecar .
.
.
Phumza:
IguessIf el lasleepont hecouchbecauseIwokeupwhensomeonewasput t
ingmedown, it
wasYandi sasoIhel dont ohi m.
Him:Babe. ..
Me:Idon' twantyout ogo.
Him:Idon' twantt ogot oobutIr eallyhavet ooot herwiseI 'lll
oosethiscont r
actandyouknow
whatt hatmeans.
Me:You' l
lloosemoney, Iknow.
Him:Exact lyandyouknowweneedi t
.
Me:IknowbutIst illdon' twantyout ogo.
Him:Okayt ellyouwhat ,I'l
l comebackever yweekend.
Me:Pr omi se?
Him:Ipr omi semyl ove.
Heki ssedmynoset henhel dmet ight.Wesati neachot her s'embracef oratl
east2mi nut
es
thenbr okei tandki ssed, onet hingl edt oanot herandt her ewewer emaki ngloveli
kei
twasour
l
ast .
>>hour slat er .
..
Mandl a:Comeonmanwehavet ogonoworel seyouwi llloseyourf l
ight.
Yandi :Letmet al ktomywi fe! .
..Babe, myl ove. ..
Hecuppedmyf acet henki ssedmyl i
ps.
Him:Ihavet ogonow.
Me:Don' tgo, please. .
.
Him:Wespokeaboutt hisnj emyl ove.
Heki ssedmyeyest henwi pedmyt ears.
Him:I 'l
l cal lyouhouroft heday.
Inodded.
Him:Il oveyouandt akecar eofyour self.
Me:Nawet akecar eofyour sel f
.
Him:Iwi l
lbabe, Ipr omi se.
Me:Il oveyou.
Him:Il oveyoumor e.
Weshar edaki ss, br okei twhenMandl ahoot ed.
Him:Okaybabe. .
.Olwet hul ookaf terherpl ease.
Olwet hu:Iwi ll.
Him:Okayi fyouneedanyt hi ngjustcal lmeormom.
Wenodded.
Him:Il oveyou.
Me:Il oveyout oo.
Webabyki ssedbuthepul ledmebackf ormor e.
Him:Ial readymi ssyourl i
ps, bodyandever yt hingaboutyou.
Olwet hu:OhmyGodj ustgoal r
eady!
Shepushedhi m, hechuckl ed.
Him:Don' tforgetthatIloveyou, thebothofyou.
Olwethu:Hayiwet huwaskewamushy, justgo.
Him:Hayi suka, Iloveyouqha!
HekissedOl wethu'sforeheadt henmyl ipsandwal kedovertoMandl a'
scar ,
hegotonand
wavedatus.Wewavedbackt hentheyst art
edmovi ng,
Itookadeepbr eathandt r
iedtohol d
backmyt ears.
Olwethu:Shut hiyouwi llcr
yl i
ket hi
sever yt
imeheleavesbecausehi sj obr equireshimt ot ravel
alot.
Shewal kedbacki ntothebuilding.Iwipedmyt earsbeforefoll
owingaf t
erher ,Igottoour
apart
mentandwentst rai
ghttoourr oom.Igotont hebedandcr i
edmysel ftosleep.
.
IwokeupwhenOl wethuaskedmet ochanget hesheetslol,
Iguessshehear dusear li
er.Igot
upandchangedt hesheet sthenwentt othebathr
oom towashmyf ace, itfeltdrynje.Afterthat
Ichangedt oani ght dr
essandgotont hebedandundert heduvet
, Ifellasleepi mmedi ately.

17
Yandi sa:
Iwokeupmi ssi ngmywi fesoIdeci dedt ocal lher,shepi ckedupont hefour
thri
ng.
Me:Myyonki ntoendi yit
handayoemhl abeni .(myever ythingIloveonearth)
Her:Qhawewam
Ichuckl ed, howIwi shIcoul dseeherf acialexpressi onr i
ghtnow.
Me:Heymyl ove, haveyoust oppedcr ying?
Her:Iwasn' tcr yinghah!
Me:Yeahr ight !
Shegi ggl ed.
Her:Wenahaveyou?
Me:Iwasn' tcr ying, Ijusthadsomet hingi nmyeyes.
Shehasneverl aughedsohar d.
Her:Ne?
Me:Iam ser iousbabe, mendon' tcry.
Her:Butar ealmandoes. ..
Me:Onl ywheni tsnecessar yandonl yf orhisqueen.
Her:Soyouadmi tt ocrying?
Me:Yeahyeah, wenzan?Ar eyouupyet ?
Her:YeahIwokeupt oclean, eatandhadabat hbutIam backi nbednow.
Me:HowIwi shIwast heret ocuddl eyou.
Her:Iknow, Imi ssyou.
Me:AndImi ssyout oo.
Her:Whatar eyougoi ngt odot oday?
Me:Ihaveameet ingwi thmycl ientin2hour s,I'
llseeaf terthemeet i
ng.
Her:Okay. .
Wecont inuedt alkingunt ilIhadt ogetr eadyf ormymeet ing.Wesai dourgoodbyesandhung
upt henIgotupandgotr eadyt omeetmycl ientandhi sAr chi
tect.
.
.
Phumza:
Afterdr oppi ngt hecal lIgotupt opeet henwentbackt obed.Ol wethuwalkedinasIwasjust
aboutt oswi tchof f
,Iwast ir
ed.IguessIwasmi ssingmyman.Okaybackt oOlwethuwasall
dressedupandl ookingf ly.Themakeupwasonf leekandsowast heoutfi
t.
Olwet hu:Yougoi ngt ost ayinbedal lday?
Me:Ihavenot hingbet t
ert odo.Wenauyaphi ?
Her:Tot hebeachwi thsomef r
iends,let sgo.
Me:NoIr atherst ayindoor sandsl eep.
Her:Ohsui tyour self,doyouhavemoneyt olendme?
Ofcossheknewt herewasmoneyi nt hehouse.
Me:No.
Her :Comeoneveni fitsahundr ed.
Me:Ol wet hut hi smoneyi ssupposedt ol astust hewhol emont h.
Her :Hayiwet hui fyouaskf ormoneyubhut iwi l
lgi vei ttoyou.
Igotupandt ookaR100not ef rom t hemoneyYandi sal eftusandgavei tt oher .
Me:Thi sist heonl ymoneyyouwi llevert akef rom t hismoney.
Her :Thankyou.
Me:Yeahwhatever .
Shesmi led, fixedherhai rt hent ookherbagandwal kedout .Imadet hebedandcl eanedt he
messOl wet hul ef tthenIwentt ot heki tchen.Imademysel fabowlofcer ealt hensatdowni n
frontoft het v.Af tereat i
ngIgotupt or i
nset hebowlt hencal l
edmom, Imi ssedherand
ever yoneathome.Shet ooki timmedi atelyandwespokenj eaboutt het hi ngst hatwer e
happeni ngel al i
nisi nceIl ef t.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Acoupl eofhour slat er...
Af t
ert hemeet ingwi tht hecl ientIdeci dedt ocal lmybeaut ifulwi f
e, Iwasmi ssingherandhome.
Ireal l
ywasn' tf eelingbei ngawayf rom homeanymor e,atfirstthist ravel lingwasexci tingbut
now. .notsomuch.Thegamehadr eal l
ychangedf orme, Ihadsomeonet omi ssathomenow,
someoneIt rulyl ovedsobei ngawayf rom herwaski ndofhar d.Ideci dedt ovi deocal lher,Ijust
hadt oseeher .Shepi ckedupaf terawhi l
e,Iam sur eshewasst i
llrecal lingwhatIt aughther .
Me:Ther eshei s( lookedl i
keIwokeherup)heymyl ove.
Shesmi ledandr ubbedhereyes, Ismi ledback.I twasr eallygoodseei ngher .Itsjustbeenaf ew
hour sbutImi ssedherl ikecr azy, howwasIgoi ngt osur vivet his?
Her :Heyawusemhl eukude.
Ilaughed, Iwasact ual l
ybl ushi ng.
Me:Mor et hanyou?
Her :Ewet shi n.
Me:Hayingekest handwasam i tsl ikeyouj ustgotmor ebeaut i
ful.
Shel aughed.
Me:Andt hatsmi lemyl ove, thatl augh!Ummmm!
Peopl elookedatmeandsmi led,yuhabant unendaba.
Me:Hayiwet huQhawe.
Ilaughedandwespokef orawhi let henwesai dourgoodbyesandhungup.If inishedmydr i
nk
thencal ledovert hewai ter ,Iset tl
edmybi l
lthengotupandwal kedoutt her estaur ant.That's
wher ewehadt hemeet i
ng, i
twasnot hingser ious.AnywayIgotacabt ot akemet oamal l,Ihad
acr azyi dea.Iwasgoi ngt ogetat at tooofandf ormywi fe,justsomet hi ngt oshowherhow
muchshemeanst ome.Somet hi ngt oshowmygr atitudet owar dsher , somet hingt or emindme
ofourl ove.I nkl over swi llunder st and.
.
.
Phumza:
Thenextcoupl eofdayswer ebor ing, Imi ssedYandi sal i
kecr azyt hatIevenf eltli
ket alki
ngt o
him overt hephonewasn' tenough.Iwant edhi m backathomewi thme, Imi ssedbei ngi nhi s
strongar ms, hissof tlipsagai nstmi ne, hisgent l
et ouch. ..Iwasal mostmi serabl eandl onely
wi t
houthi m, Ol wet huwasal waysoutwi thherf riendsoratherboyf riend' shouse.Ther ewer e
night swher eshedi dn' tevenbot hercomi ngbackbutshecal l
edyenashamet otellmewhen
shewasn' tcomi ngback.Buti twoul dhavebeenr eallygr eathavi ngsomeonet ot alktoei t
her
thansl eepal lday.
Anywayt hedaywasaThur sdayIwasi nthelounge, ont hecoucheat i
ngwhenOl wet huwal ked
i
n.Shewascomi ngf rom t heshops, shewentt obuybr ead.
Her :Youal wayseat ingt hesedays.
Ishr uggedmyshoul der s.
Her :Andi fyounoteat i
ngyoui nbedsl eeping.
Me:BecauseIhavenot hingt odo.
Her :Thenacceptmyi nvi t
at ionswhenIi nvi t
eyouout , wherei sahousepar tyatmyf riend's
houset oni ght .Comewi thme.
Me:Meandhousepar ti
es?No.Yourbr otherwontbehappyaboutt hat.
Her :Justf ort oni ght, wegoi ngt owai tforther esultst here.Besi desnoonewi l
ltel
lhim.
Toni ghtwast heeni ght ,wewer ef i
nal lyget ti
ngourmet ri
cr esultsandIwasner vous.Justal i
tt
le,
Ihadf aithi nmysel f
.
Me:HayiYandi saal readycal l
ed, ut heyourf atherwi l
lcomef etchusaf terwor k.
Her :Wegoi ngt owai tt her e?I 'l
l gocr azy, besidesIal readyhadot herpl ans.
Me:Thencancelsi si, hei sgoi ngt odr i
veust othegar aget ogett hepaper .
Her :Ican' tcancelnow, tellYandi sat ocalldad.Comeonwecanwal kt ot hegar agetoget her.
Me:Ican' tdot hat .
Her :Becauseyoudon' tobj ect ?Youj ustdowhat everhet ell
syout odo?
Ishr uggedmyshoul der s, that '
spr et tymuchwhatIdi d.
Her :Gr owbal lsmar ndude!
Ilaughed.Hayi freedom wasget t
ingt ohershame, whenshewasl i
vingwi t
hherpar ent sshe
wasn' tanydi fferentt oapr isonerandnowt hatshehassmel tabi toff reedom shewasgoi ng
nuts.
Me:Sot hatyoucansayIam di srespect ful?Not hanks.( shesul ked)Wewi llaskforyour
parent s' per missi ont ogot ot hathousepar t
ybuti ftheysayno, sohl ala.
Her :Youmeanyou' l
laskyourf atherYandi sa?
Ismi led.
Me:Ewe.
Her :Butsozeavume.( hewi l
lneveragr eet oit)
Me:Fi newi thme, Idon' twantt ogopar tying.
Sheshookherhead.
Her :Youbor ing.
Ilaughedandgotup, Iwentt omyr oom t opackanover nightbag.
>>af ewhour sl ater .
..
At6: 30Ol wet hu' sf at hercal ledupt elli
ngust hathewasdownst airssoIt ookmybagandphone,
toget herwi thmykeyst henwewal kedout .Wel ockedt hedoorbehi ndusandwentdownst air
s,
Olwet huwasst il
lsul ki ngshamel ol .Shewasf unnynj e.Wegotdownst airsandwentt otata'
s
car.Wegoti nandgr eet ed.
Tata: Nt ombi zam, howar eyou?Howar et hener ves?
Me:Notsomucht ata.
Him:Meani ngyouknowyoudi dwel l.Lwet hu?
Ilookedather .
Her :Justal i
ttle.
Ismi led.
.
Whenwegothomewegothomewepar kedt hengotof f
,wewenti nsideandgr eeted.Mom and
Zethuwer ei nt hel oungeeat ing, t
heyr espondedsowesatdown.
Mama:Woah, Zet hugett hem t heirf ood.
Me:HayimamaIcangett hef ood, canIgoputmybag?
Olwet hu:Di dn' tyouj usteatbef orewel eftthef l
at ?
Me:Ieatal otwhenIam st ressed.
Olwet hu:You' l
lgetf at !
Mama:Hayiwet huLwet hul etmybabyeatxaef una, ewenonoi nyourr oom.
Ismi ledandgotup, Iwentt oputt hebagdownt henheadedt otheki tchen.If i
rstservedmy
fatheri nl aw, fol l
owedbyOl wet hut henIt ookmyf oodandwentt oeatdown.Af t
ereat ingIwent
todot hedi shesi nt heki tchen, Zet huandOl wethukeptmecompany.Theywer etalkingabout
thehousepar ty,itwasj ustacoupl eofhousesawayf rom her eandi tlookedl i
keZet huwas
planni ngongoi ng.
Me:UyabonakeOl wet huyoucangot oyourpar ty.
Lwet hu:Shutup!
Zethu:Butwest i
ll havet ot al ktodad.
Lwet hu:Nol etst alkt omom t henshecanconvi ncedad.
Zethu:That '
sani dea, youcomi ngr i
ght?
Lwet hu:Wer hdon' teveni nvol vei nthandokaziyabot heywontagr eet oit.
Zethu:Att heendoft hedaywedoneedPhumza, mom wontal lowust oleaveherher eallalone.
Lwet hu:Mom won' tagr eet olethergot ot hepar tyunlessbhut isaysshecangoandyouknow
bhut iwontagr eet ot hat ,
andi fhedoesn' tt heni twon' tevengett odad.
Zethu:Phumzaknowsal lther ightt hingst osayt osof t
enYandi saup.
Theyl ookedatme.
Me:NoIwontdot hat .
Lwet hu:Awucomeon!
Me:No.
Zethu:Pl ease.
Me:Youguyscangoal one, I
'l
lj ustsleep.
Lwet hu:Mxm.
Zethubeggedmet i
llIagr eedt ocal lYandi sasoaf t
erdoi ngt hedi sheswewentt oZet hu'
sr oom
andcal ledYandi sa.Hepi ckedupaf t
er5r ings.
.
Him:St handwasam.
Me:Heybabe. ..
Itoldhim aboutt hehousepar ty,howmuchhi ssi sterswant edt ogoandhowt heyhadmade
met hekeyt ogoout .Hel aughed.
Him:Ohmyl ove...No!
Me:Okay.Ul alekahl e.
Him:Yout oo, Iloveyou.
Me:Il oveyout oo.
Wehungupandt heyl ookedatme.
Me:Hesai dno.
Zethu:Kant iwhatwer eyousayi ngokayt o?
Me:Tot hat .
Zethu:Justl iket hat ?
Lwet hu:Uyaphambhanal ona!
Ilaughed, seriousl yIdi dn'twantt ogot onopar ty.Ijustmi ssedmymanandIwast ir
ed.AllI
want edt odowassl eep.Agai nt heyconvi ncedmet ocal lYandi saandconvi ncehimt ochange
hismi ndbuthewasn' tgoingt odot hat.Hi smi ndwasmadeup, hedi dn'
twantmet ogowi thout
him.Endofst ory!Zet hut ookt hephoneandbeggedhi mt il
lheagr eedt oit
,shethankedhi m
thengavemet hephone.Theywal kedout , totalkt otheirmot hermaybe.
Yandi :Nodr inkingordanci ngwi t
hboys, don' tacceptdr inksf rom anyone.Not alkingt oboys, i
f
youdot henI '
llkillyou.
Me:OhmyGodcomedown.
Hel aughed.
Yandi :Don' twearsomet hingshor tanddon' twearadr ess.
Me:Okay.
Yandi :Don' tlookt oobeaut i
fulanddon' tsmi le,itstoosexy.
Ilaughed.
Yandi :Iwi sht hatIcoul dwr iteabi gsignsayi ngyouar emar r i
edsot hatnomancanl ookatyou.
Agai nIlaughed.
Me:Don' twor rymyl ovet heycanl ookbutt heycan' ttouch.
Yandi :Andt heybet ternotevent ry,yousomeone' swi fe.Butdohavef unbutnott oomuchf un.
Me:IbetIwont .
Yandi :Youbet ternot ,ohmyGodIwon' tsleept onight.
Wel aughed.
Me:Not hingwi llhappent ome.
Yandi :Youar epr eci oust omesot heybet terl ookaf teryoui nt hatpar ty.
Me:I '
lltellthem.
Yandi :OkaybabyIl oveyou.
Me:Il oveyout oo.
Yandi :Mcwamcwaaa!
Igiggl edandsai ditback, helaughedt oot henwehungup.
.
IguessIf ellasl eepwhi l
eIwaswai t
ingf ort hem becauset heywokemeupwheni twast i
met o
gobuyt hepaper ,
thet i
mewas00: 15.Igotupandwentt ofreshenupt henwewentout sideto
tata'scar ,Igoti nthebackseat .Andhedr oveust ot hegar age,whenwegott herehegotof fand
wentt obuyt hepaper .Hecamebackwi thitsowegotoutoft hecarandl ai
ditonthegr ound,
wesetdownt ooandl ookedf orourschool sthenournames.Ol wethuf oundhernamef irstand
wentcr azy, nowt hepr essurewasonme.Ievenf eltlikecryi
ng.
Me:I tsnother e,ali
kho!
Zet hut ookt hepaperandl ookedt hroughi tthenpoi ntedtoit.Ilookedcl oseranditwasr eally
mi ne, Ical l
edYandi saimmedi at
el y.Hewashappyf orme, Ievencal ledmom.Shewassoo
happyf orme, Ididit.
Tat a: Thankyoubant wanabam, your eal l
ydi dwel l.Hayikeyoucangot oyourparty.
Lwet hu:Thankyoudaddy.
Me:HayiIj ustwantt ogot obedmna.
Zet hu:Hayi wet hul etsgocelebr ateyourpass.
Tat a: Nodr i
nki ng.
Zet hu:Wepr omi se.
Tat a: Andl ookaf t
eryourbr other'swi f
e, uyalezilengaye.
Zet hu:Okayt at a.
Hedr oveushomet ochanget henwewal kedt othepar ty,t
hest reetswer ebusynjengat hiit
wasst i
lldur ingdayt ime.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Myphonewokemeupf rom my" sleep" ,Icoul dn'
tsl eepknowi ngt hatmywi fewasoutt here
par tyingwi t
houtme.Icheckedt hecal lerI Dt hent ookt hecall.
Me:Myout ti
e!
Him:Youbet tergetbackher enow.
Me:Why?Whathappened?
Him:Iam i nsomehousepar tyandIt hinkIj ustsawyourwi fe.
Ijumpedoutofbed.
Me:Doi ngwhat ?!
Him:Shei sdanci ng.
Me:Wi thwho?
Hel aughed.
Him:Wai t
.
Hehunguponmy, shit
!Itri
edcal lingherphonebuti twasof f
,Icall
edekaOl wethuandi twas
thesamet hing.Iwasaboutt ogetdr essedwhenamessagecamet hr ough,Iviewedit.Itwasa
videoofPhumzaandOl wethudanci ngonat able,peopl ewer echeer ingf orthem.Yoh!Wast hat
mywi fe?

18
Yandi sa:
Ihadt oconvi ncemysel ftocalm down, andt hatmywi f
ewasn'tdr unk.ButIcouldn'
t!Whythe
fuckwasshedanci ngonat able?!Wasshedr unk? !Fuck!Icouldn'tbeli
evethi
s.Icalledt
hei
r
phonesagai nbutt heywer esti
lloffandthatr eall
ypi ssedmeof f,whywer etheirphonesoff
?I
receivedamessagef rom Chant el
leanditwasasl i
ghtlydif
fer
entvi deototheoneMandl asent
(caption:Isn'
tthisyourwi fedancingont ables? ),
thiswasembar rassingman.IcalledMandla
i
mmedi atelyandaskedhi mt ogetherof fthet ableandgi veherthephone.
Mandl a:Nahl etherhavef unman.
Me:That '
smywi feont hattabl
eman!
Hel aughed.
Him:Andshel ooksl i
keshei shavingthet i
meof fherl i
fe.
Me:Mandl ajustgetherof fthedamnt ableman!
Him:Rel axIaskedLubanzit ogetheroff.
Me:I sshedr unk?
Him:Idon' tknow, Idi dn'tseeherdr i
nkingal cohol .Butwhat evershehadi smakinghercr azy.
Me:Whatdi dshehave?
Him:Idon' tknow!
Me:Thencheckf orme, askZet hu!
Him:I '
lldoso.
Me:Andt aket hem homemanpl ease!
Him:Don' tshoutatmeman!Iam doi ngyouaf avourapha, I'llt
akeherhome.
Me:Butnotdad' shouse, takehert oourapar tment .
Him:I '
lldoso.
Me:Makesur eshei ssaf ene?
Him:Letmeat tendt ot hem ngoku, t
heyl ookr eallyoutofi t
.
Me:Al rightcal lmewhent heyhome.
Him:Shar p!
WehungupandIt hr ewt hephoneont hebed, whatt hehel lwaswr ongwi thPhumzana?It ook
myphoneandwat chedt hevi deoagai n, heh!UPhumza!Ubezondazil o!
.
.
Phumza:
Me:Wai t!Woahyounotmyhusband, youcan' tt el
lmewhatt odo!
Lubanzi :Pl easegetdownsi si ndi kucelangesi hl enjena.
Ilaughed, Idon' tknowwhybutwhathesai dsoundedf unny.
Mandl a:Lubanzi !Lubanzi !
HepushedLubanzi asi deandpul l
edmebymyhand.
Me:Uzondi phul anj e!
Mandl a:Hayi shutup!
Hecar r
iedmeoverhi sshoul der, Ihithisback.
Me:Ust rongomos!
Mandl a:Ewe!LubanzigetOl wet huandwenaZet hu!Fol lowme!
Hecar r
iedmeoverhi sshoul deral lt
hewayt ot hegat eandt ot hecar ,Iwaslaughi ngallthi
s
while.Heputmei nthebackseatbutIgotout ,Ididn'twantt osi tdown, Iwantedt otakeawal k.I
j
ustf eltlikeIwasgoi ngcr azy, Iwasl aughi ngatanyt hingandever ything.Heheldmyar mtight
maki ngmescr eam.
Me:Youhur ti
ngme!
Mandl a:Whatt hef uckdi dyougi veher ? !
Zethu:Shej usthadmuf fins.
Mandl a:Muf f
ins? !
Zethu:Spacemuf fins.
Mandl a:Howmany?
Zethu:Four .
..
Mandl a:Four ? !Areyoucr azy? !
Heshookhi sheadandputmei nt hecart ogetherwi t
hOl wet hu, Lubanzisatwi thusi nthe
backseatj ustsohecoul dguar dourever ymovement .Zethut ookt hef rontpassengerseatand
offwewentt oYandi sa'shousef ormykeyt hent ot hef l
at.Whenwegott her
ewegotof fand
theycar r
iedusupt omyapar tment ,
wewer emaki ngnoi se,si nging, screaming,laughingyou
namei t.Wej ustcoul dn' tshutup.Whenwegott omyr oom t heyt hrewusont hecouchandt hey
remai nedst andi ng.
Mandl a:4? !Whatwer eyout hi nking?
Zethu:Pl easedon' ttel lYandi sa, hewi l
l kil
lme.
Mandl a:Justt urnyourphoneon!
Zethu:IswearIhadnoi deat heywer espacemuf f
ins.
Mandl a:Tel lthatt oYandi sabecauseyouar ecal li
nghi mr i
ghtnow.
.
Acoupl eofhour sl ater .
..
Iwokeupheavyheadedandmyeyeswer eitchy.Ir ubbedt hem t hengotoutofbedt ofindthatI
wasst i
llinl astni ght '
scl ot hes, maybeIpassedoutont hecouchbecauseIcoul dn'tremember
howIgother e.Lastni ghtwascr azyorIwascr azy?Whatwaswr ongwi thmet hough?Icoul d
swearIwasgoi ngcr azyandIhaveneverexper iencedsomet hingl i
ket hati nmyl ife.Iwentt o
thebat hroom t opee, thendeci dedt ohaveashowersoIundr essedandgotundert heshower .
Aftershower i
ngIgotoutt odr ymybody, Igotdi zzynj eal lofasuddenandIhadanur gencyt o
puke.Il i
ftedt het oiletseatandt hr ewup, aftert hatIgotupandf lushedt henr insedmymout h
thoroughl y.ButIwasn' thappyIst i
llhadabi ttert asteinmymout hsoIbr ushedmyt eet ht hen
wentt omyr oom t ol ot ionandgetdr essed.Af terget ti
ngdr essedIwentt ot hef ront ,Iwant edto
askMandl aorZet huaboutl astni ghtbutIdi dn' tfindthem t her e.Ionl yf oundanot e,itr ead;"we
hadt oleavef orwor kear lyt hismor ning, Yandi saknowst hatyouwer eoutofi tl astni ghtso
switchonyourphoneandcal l him.Goodl uck" .Goodl uckf ornt oni ?Iwasi ndeepshi tkal ok
apha!HowwasIgoi ngt oexpl ai nmycr aziness?Ourphoneswer eont hecof f eet abl esoIt ook
mineandt urnedi ton.Asi tdidyonkel entoyayoImademysel fsomet hingt oeatt hensatdown
andat e.Ol wet huwal kedi nndi sadl a.
Her:Whatdi dwehavel astni ght ?Becausewhat everwehadr eallydr oveusi nsane.
Ishruggedmyshoul der s.
Me:Yandi saknows.
Her:Nj ani?How?Hewasn' tther emos!
Me:Maybet heyt oldhi m.
Her:Bloodysni tches!
Me:Di dwedr i
nkal cohol ?Anyt hi ng?Idi dn' tdrinkdi dI?Yandi sat oldmenott odr inkbut ..
.
Tearsr oll
eddownmycheeksandIwi pedt hem.
Her:Youwoul dr ememberi fyoudr ankal cohol .Wewer en'tdr unkl astni ght , Idon' tknowwhat
happened.
Shel ookedatme.
Her:Maybewewer edr ugged.Whati fwewer er aped?Whati fMandl aandLubanzidi d
somet hingt ouswhi lewewer esl eepi ng?Wher ear etheyvel e?
Me:Idon' tknowOl wet hubutwewoul df eelsomet hingr i
ght ?
Her:Doyouf eelanyt hing?
Ishookmyheadandl ookedatmyr i
ngi ngphone, i
twasYandi sa.Il ookedatOl wet huandshe
l
ookedatt hephonet oo.Wewi pedourf acesandl ookedateachot her.
Her:Don' tt akei t( Ilookeddownati t)ifheknowst hatyouwer eact ingcr azyl astni ghtt henhe
i
spr obabl yangr y.( itst oppedr ingi ngsowel ookedateachot her )Let sj ustr ecal lourst eps,
whatwehadanddi dn' thave.Di dweacceptanydr i
nksf rom anyone?
Me:No, wej usthadt hosedel iciousmuf f
ins.
Her:Exact l
y!AndIdr ankal coholkanci nci buti twasn' tspi ked.Wecanr ememberever ything
thathappenedatt hepar ty, whycan' twer ememberwhatwehadt hatmadeusactsoooutofi t.
Iwasseei ngt hi
ngst hatwer en'tt her ephezol o.
Me:AndsowasI !Wai t...whatar espacemuf fins?Iwascr azyl astni ghtbutIcanr emember
Zethusayi ngt hatname.
Her:Didweeatt hem?
Myphonest artedr i
ngi ngagai n, wel ookedati t.
Her:Takei t.
Inoddedandt ookt hecal l
.
.
Me:Qhawe
Him:Don' tQhaweme!Whatt hehel lhappenedt oyoul astni ght ?!
Me:Idon' tknow. ..
Him:Youdon' tknow? !Youwer edanci ngont abl es!
Me:IknowandIam sor ry,Idon' tknowwhatgoti ntome.
Him:Whatgoti nt oyour eal ly?
Me:Idon' tknowbutdanci ngf el tgoodbabeubungabona, If eltlikeanangel .
Hechuckl ed.
Him:Iam sur eyouf el tl i
keyouwer ewal kingoncl ouds.
Me:That '
st hef eel ing!Andt heni tgotcr azy, Iwasseei ngcr azyt hings.Lubanziwast alkingl i
ke
alitt
legirl..
.Iwasact ingr eal l
yhotheaded, Iam sor ryforembar r
assi ngyou.
Hechuckl edagai n.
Him:Ohmyl ove...Iknowi twasn' tyourf aul t.Butt hatdoesn' tmeanIam notangr ywi thyou, I
askedyounott oacceptanyt hingf rom anyone.
Me:KodwababeIdi dn' teatordr inkanyt hi ngbesi dest hemuf f
insZet hugavet ous.
Him:Babet hosemuf finshadweed.
Me:What ?!Weed? !Idi dn' tknow.
Him:Iknowmyl ovebutZet huwi llr eallygeti tf r
om me.
Me:Hahbabedon' t, f
or giveherl ikeyouf or gaveme.
Him:Foryou, Iwi l
lbutnomor epar tiesst handwasam.
Me:Nomor ebabeandnomor etrust i
nganyt hi ngZet hugi vest ome.
Hel aughedandwecont inuedt alking, hewant edmet ot ellhim allaboutlastni ght '
scraziness
andhehadneverl aughedsohar d.Iwasj ustgl adhewasn' tmadatmeornot hingbad
happenedt ome, lastni ghtmi ghthavebeenf un.Bei nghi ghwascr azyandf unt oobutIwas
neverget ti
nghi gheveragai n,never !Iwasn' tapar tygi rlorevenast oner ,l
ikemyhusband
woul dsay.Justi magi neahomeofst oner s,yuhha. ashame.Anywayaf tert alkingwehungup.
Olwet hu:Thatsmi lemeans?
Me:Hei sangr ybutheunder standst hatIdi dn' tknowwhatt heywer emnaIj ustt houghtIwas
eatingt hemostdel iciousmuf fi
nsever .
Olwet hu:Iam def initelynotdoi ngt hatagai n, Imeanwhywoul dn'tZethut elluswhatt heywer e?
Me:Idon' tknow, wenzan?
Her :Maki ngbr eakf ast .
Me:Yeahbutwhat 'st hatwei rdsmel l
?
Her :Whatwei rdsmel l?
Me:That .
..
.
Icoul dn'tfini sht hesent ence, Irant ot hebat hroom andt hrewup.Af t
erthatIgotupandf lushed
thenr insedmymout h.Il ookedatmysel fi nt hemi r
rort henwentbackt ot hef r
ont ,thesmel l
wasst il
lther eandi twasmaki ngmesi ckt omyst omach.
Her :Ar eyouokay?
Me:Idon' tknowbut ...
Iputupmyhandandr ant othebat hr oom, Ithr ewupagai n.Thenaf terIgotupandf l
ushedt hen
ri
nsedmymout h.Iwal kedoutoft hebat hroom andwentt omyr oom, Iwasf eel ingweakand
dizzyf rom al lthatt hr owi ngup.Igotont hebedandcl osedmyeyes.
.
IguessIf el lasl eepbecauseIwaswokenupbyOl wet hushaki ngme, Islowl yopenedmyeyes.
Thel ightswer eon, kant iwhatt imewasi t?OrwasIst illdizzy?
Her :Iwasst ar ti
ngt owor ry.
Me:Whatt i
mei sit?
Her :Af t
er7, damngi rlyoucansl eep.
Istretchedt hengotof fbed.I twasunl i
kemet osl eepf orcloset o5hour sdur ingdayt ime, what
thehel lwaswr ongwi thme?
Me:Iwasf eel ingal it
tlesi cksor ry.
Her :Youbet ternow?
Inoddedandheadedoutoft her oom, Iwentt ot hebat hroom t or i
nsemymout ht henwentt o
thef r
ont .Iwashungr ysoImademysel fasandwi ch, Iwasn' tint hemoodf orcooki ng.
"Bhut icalledwhi l
eyouwer est i
llout , hewontbeabl et ocomebackhonef ort heweekend. ",she
satont hecouch.
Me:I tsf i
ne, Iam noti nt hemoodf orcompanyanyway.
Her :Het houghtyouwer egoi ngt obemadathi m.
Me:Mad?Wel lal itt
lebutIam notf eel ingwel lsoIr athersl eepal lweekend.
Her :Yousl eepal ott hesedays.
Me:Iwasexhaust edIguess.
Her :From?
Me:Yourbr ot her,myhusbanddi dn' tgi vememuchr estwhenhewasher e.
Her :OhmyGod!Spar emet hedet ai ls.
Ilaughedandwentt oj oi nheront hecouch, shewasst il
lchannelhoppi ngsear chi ngfor
somet hingt owat ch.
Her :Didyoumakemesome?
Me:Youwantsome?
Her:Notr eallyitsj ustt
hatyouhave8sl i
cesaphoandyouj ustal one.
Me:Ihaven' teat ensincel astnight,Iam boundt ogethungryhel lo!
Her:You'llgetf ati fyougoonaboutt hingskanj e.
Me:Mybody, notyour snana.
Her:Pshhhhh!
Il
aughedandat emysandwi chwhi l
echat ti
ngtoOl wethu.Af t
ereat i
ngIdi dt hedishesthatwere
i
nt hesinkt hencl eaned.Af t
erallofthatIwentf orashowerandgotr eadyf orbed.WhenIgot
onbedIcal ledmyhusband, Imissedhi m.
Him:Mr sDl ami ni
Me:Heymyl ove, howar eyou?
Him:I'
m goodmyl ove,howaboutyou?Ol wethut ol
dmet hatyouwer en'tfeel i
ngwellearl
ier
.
Me:Iwasn' tbutIam f i
nenow.
Him:Okaymyl ove, Iam glad.Di dshet ellyouaboutmycal l?
Me:Yeah, youcan' tcomehome.
Him:Iam sor r
ymyl ove,IknowIpr omi sedbutIhaveal otofwor ktodoher e.
Me:Itsfinemyl oveIunder stand.
Him:Soyounotmad?
Me:Of cosnotIam noti nt hemoodf orcompanyanyway.
Him:Ar eyousur eyouar ef i
ne?
Me:Yesdon' twor ryaboutme, j
ustmakesur eyougett hisprojectdonef astsoyoucancome
backhome.
Him:Ohbabet hiswi l
ltakemor ethanj ustamont htocompl etebutI '
llbehomebef oremonth
end,mybossi sal readygi vingmegr i
ef.
Me:Icani magi ne.
Him:Butenoughaboutwor k,st
handwasam i fyounotf eel
ingwel lt
omor rowyoushoul dgosee
adoctor.
Me:Itsnot hingmyl ovetrustme.
Him:No, ifyounotf eel
ingwel lt
omor rowI '
llcal
lmom andshewi llnott akenof orananswer .
Me:OhmyGod, okayIwi l
lgoseeadoct or.
Him:Good.
Me:Butt hat '
si fIam notwel l
.
Him:Ewekl k. .
..
.Wecont inuedt alki
ngaboutanyt hingandever ythingt i
lllate.Thenf i
nal
lysaid
ourgoodbyesandhungup.If el
lasleepi mmedi atelyaf
tert
hat .

19
Phumza:
3weeksl ater...
ThedaywasaFr idayandIwasi nmyr oom sleepingwhensomeoneshookmeawake.
Me:Hayimar n!!!
"Hayikalokst handwasam Imi ssedyou",Iknewt hatvoicesowell
.Iknewmyhusband' svoice
andImi ssedi tsomuch, Iopenedmyeyest henr ubbedthem.
Him:Itsreallymest handwasam.
Her emovedmyhandsf rom myeyesandl ookedatme.
Him:Heybabe
Isatupandhuggedhi m,Imissedhim somuch.I tsbeenamont handIreall
ymi ssedhim,Iwas
evenstarti
ngt othinkhewasn' tcomingback.
Me:Iwasst artingtothinkyouabandonedme.
Hechuckl ed.
Him:Never ,Iwoul dneverabandonyou.Ndi kuthandakangakakodwamyl ove.
Igiggl
ed.
Me:Imi ssedyou.
Him:Imi ssedyout oo.
Webr okeoutofeachot hers'
embr ace,hekissedmyf or
eheadthenli
ps.Justapeck.
Him:Tellmewhyar eyousleeping?IthoughtIwoul dcomehomet ofi
ndmywi fewai t
ingforme
andahomecookedmeal .
Me:Iwast i
redsor rybutIcancooknow.
Hi m:Hai bobabeukhat haliswayi ntoni ndingekho?
Igi ggledandhi thi schest .
Hi m:Ouch!
Me:Yousonaught yt hough( hel aughed) ,letmegetupsot hatIcancook.
Hi m:Di dyouseet het i
me?I ts19h00al r
eady.
Me:Whydi dn' tyout el lmeyouwer ecomi nghome?Iwoul dhavecooked.
Hi m:Iwant edt osur pr iseyou.
Me:Uyabonakeyoursur pr i
se.
Hi m:Iknow, wher ei syoursi st
er ?
Me:Shewentoutbutshewi llbeback, whol etyoui n?
Hi m:I twasn' tl ocked.
Hepeckedmyl ipst hengotup.
Hi m:I '
m goi ngt ohaveashowert henwecangof ordinner.Andbabe, callyoursi stertellherto
comehomebecausemom i nvi tedusf ordinner .
Me:Ohyourmot herknewf irstt hatyouback?
Hechuckl ed.
Hi m:Don' tt ellmet hatyouj eal ous.
Me:Whati fIam?
Hi m:Youdon' thavet obest handwasam.WhenMandl awasn' tpi
ckingupIcal leddadt oask
himt of etchmef rom t heai rpor tthenhedr oveushomesoIcoul dfetchmycar .That '
swhen
shesawmeandi nvi tedusoverf ordinner .
Me:Whati fIcooked?
Hi m:Iwasgoi ngt ot ur nherdown.
Me:Andmakeherhat eme?
Hi m:Hat eyou?Whocanhat esuchaf i
nel ookingwomanl ikeyourself?
Ismi l
ed.
Me:Ewene?
Hi m:Ewebabe, cal lOl wet hupl ease.
Me:I '
llcallher .
Hi m:Thankyoust handwasam, l
etmegohavet hatshower .
Me:Okay.
Het ookhi st owelandwal kedout .Igotupkenam andmadet hebedt hencal ledOl wethu, she
pickedupi mmedi at elysoIt oldhert ocomehomebecauseherbr otherwasback.Af terthatI
dr oppedt hecal landl ookedf orsomet hingt owear ,Itookoutal ongdr essandcar digant hen
i
r onedt hedr ess.Af teri r
oni ngYandi sawal kedi nwi that owelaroundhi swai st.
Me:Whatar eyougoi ngt owear ?
Hesatdownandt ookhi sbodyl oti
on.
Hi m:Theywontneedanyi roning.
Me:Ar eyousur e?BecauseIal sowantt ohaveashower .
Hi m:EwebabeIwontdr essupndi zaaphaekhaya.
Hel oti
onedhi schest ,hayi manYandi sahadanewt att
oo.
Me:I sthatanewt at too?
Hi m:Andher eIwast hinkingyouwoul dn'tnotice.
Ilaughedandt ookacl oserl ookati t( onhi sleftbr east),hepull
edmedownt osi tonhi sl ap.
Me:HowcanInotnot i
ce?OhmyGodYandi sai sthisr eall
yme?Wasn' titpainful?
Itwasapi ctur eofmeandmynamebel owt hepi cture,itwasbeaut i
ful.Hesmi ledasIt ouchedit,
Ilovedi t.Ilookedbeaut i
ful, Icameoutbeaut i
f ul
ly.
Hi m:Youl ovei t?
Me:Ido, intlebabe.
Hi m:I fyouhadsai d' Ido' thateasi lyatt heal ter,youwoul dhavespar edmeal otofmi xed
emot i
onsandt hought st hatwer egoi ngt hroughmymi nd.
Ilaughed.
Me:Iwasscar edhai bo.
Hi m:Scar edofwho?Me?
Me:Ewe.
Hesmi led.
Him:Hmm butIam gl adyoul ovet het attoo.Ij ustwantyout oknowt hatyoumeant hewor l
dto
me.
Me:Youmeant hewor l
dt omet oo.
Heki ssedmynoseandIsmi led, Imi ssedhi m doi ngt hat.
Him:Gogetr eadykest handwasam.
Inoddedandgotup, Itookmyt owel thenwal kedout .
.
.
Yandi sa:
Me:Babewehavet ogonowcomeon!
Ishout edf rom t hel ounge.
Her :Wear eal mostdone!
Shewashel pingOl wet hupackherbag, shewasmovi ngbackhomesi nceIwasback.We
coul dn'tl i
vewi t
hher ,mywi feandIneededpr ivacy.Af terawhi let
heywal kedoutoft he
bedr oom l ookingal lgood, womenl ovemaki ngabi gf ussovernot hing.Wewer ej ustgoi ngto
havedi nnerekhayawi t
hourusualf ami ly,wewer en'tgoi ngtosomef ancyr estaurant .AnywayI
tookOl wet hu'sbagandwewal kedoutt hendownst ai rstooutcar .Iputthebagi nthebackseat
withOl wet hut hengotont hedr i
ver '
sseatandst artedt heengi ne.IlookedatPhumzabef ore
dri
vi ngof f,Imi ssedher .
.
Wegott omom' sandgotof faf terpar kingt henwenti n.
Mom:Iwasst artingt ot hinkyouwer en' tcomi ng.
Shegotupt ohugmef ort hehundr edt ht imet oday, okondi fi
kileshehasbeenhuggi ngme.
Me:Iwoul dhavecal ledi fwewer en' tcomi ng.
Ibrokeoutofherembr ace, shegr eet edmywi fet henOl wethu.
Tata: Onecoul dswearOl wet humovedt oanot herci tyt hewayshewasscar ce.
Olwet hul aughed.
Olwet hu:Hayit at a.
Zethu:I tstruet hough.
Olwet hu:Ihadt ol ookaf termybr ot her '
swi f
ehel lo!
Mom:Andyoudi daver ygoodj ob, shel ooksbeaut iful.
Phumza&Ol wet hu:Thankyoumama.
Me:Sher eallydoes.
Shesmi ledandl ookedatme, Ifeltlikeki ssingherbutnoti nfrontofmypar ents.
Tata: Iphangal i
yat shonkosi kazi ,
Icaneatahor se.
Mama:Wegoi ngt oeatj ustnowmyl ove, letsgot othedi ni
ngt abl
e.
Weal lwentt osi taroundt het abl eandmom ser vedus, wesai dgracet hendugi n.Hal f
way
throught hemealPhumzagotupandr andownt hepassage, Igotupaf terherst i
llpuzzl ed.
Ever yonewasaspuzzl edasIwas, whatwaswr ongwi thher?Butmom t oldmet osi tdownand
eatshewasgoi ngt oat tendt oPhumza.
Me:But ..
..
Iwaswor riedabouther ,Iwant edt oknowwhatwaswr ongwithher ?Iftherewassomet hing
bother i
ngmywi feIwant edt oknowandbet her ef orher .
Mama:Nobut ssi t,I'
llseet oPhumza.
Inoddedandsatdown, mom gotupandwentt owher evershewas.
Zethu:Wowt hatwaswei rd.
Olwet hu:Notatal l
,shehasbeenl iket hatf ort hepastf ewweeks.
Me:Whatdoyoumean?
Olwet hu:Runni ngt ot het oilet.
Me:Why?Di dshegoseeadoct oraboutt hat ?
Olwet hu:Topuke, shedi dn' twantt o.
Tata: Ha. aha. adon' ttalkaboutvomi tsisi dla.
Wel aughedandcont inuedeat ing, wel lIwasn' teat inganymor e.Iwasj ustmovi ngt hef ood
aroundt hepl ate, Iwant edt oknowwhatwaswr ongwi thmywi feandmom wast akingsodamn
l
ongt ocomebackt ome.
Tata: Ifyounotgoi ngt oeatt hatf oodr athert hrowi tint hebi nthanpl aywi thit.
Idroppedt hespoonandpushedt hepl ateawayf rom me.
Me:Whati st akingt hem sol ongkant i?
Tata: Idon' tknow.
Me:I 'll gocheck.
Igotup.
Tata: Sitdown.
Me:Hayit at aIwantt oknow. ..
"Youwantt oknowwhat ?Hayiwet husi tdownyourwi fei sokay" ,Ilookedatt hem.Phumza
didn'tl ookokay, shel ookedl ikeshewascr yi
ng.
Me:Butshedoesn' tlookokay, whatdi dyousayt oher ?
Tata: Yandi sa!
Me:Iwantt oknowwhymywi fei supset .
Mama:Pl easegi veusspacet at akheandyout oogi r l
s.(theygotupandl eftther oom)It hi
nk
shei spr egnant .
Me:Pr e-what ?!
Ithinkmyear swer edecei vingme, shedi dn'tsaypr egnant .
Mama:Pr egnantYandi sabutIwantyout operf orm at esttomor r
owj ustt oconf i
rm whatIam
saying.
Ilaughed, mom wasj oki ng.Shehadt obej oking.
Me:Shei sn' tpregnant ,shecan' tbepr egnant .
Iwasn' treadyt obeaf ather ,hu- huhIhat edbabi es.Theyal wayscr ying.
Mama:Iam awomanYandi sa, amot herf orthatmat ter.Ihavet hr eegr ownupchi ldrensoI
knowt hesi gnsandsympt omsofapr egnantwomanandyourwi fei sdef initelypregnant.She
hasal lt hesi gns, alwayst ired, nausea, vomi t
ing.Doyouknowt hatshehasn' thadherper i
od
sinceNovember ?
Me:Butwedi dn' twantababynow, Phumi ..
.
Mama:Whatdoyousuggestshedoes?Abor t
?
Me:No!Of cosnotbutwebot hnotr eadyt obepar ents.
Phumza:Iam sor ry.
Me:OhmyGod!
Ihel dmyheadandshewi pedhereyes.
Phumza:NyaniYandi sai twasn' tmyi ntent i
on.
Mama:I twasn' tyouri nt ent i
on?Ar eyoumad?Thesear egoodnews!Whyni zot hethatheway
yout alking?Youar emar r
iedf orGod' ssake, ther ei snot hingwr ongwi t
hhavi ngababyt ogether
.
AndPhumzayouhavenot hi ngt obesor ryaboutbaby, Yandi sasudl alangal omt wana!She
didn'tmakeher sel fpr egnant .
Me:Butol edyi tssosudden.
Mama:Sudden?Thenyoushoul dhaveusedpr ot ection.
Me:But .
..
Mama:Ha. adon' tst andt her eandt ryt omakeherf eel guilt
yf orsomet hingshehadnocont rol
over .Youshoul dbehappyandcomf ortinghernotshout ingshecantbepr egnant .Youshould
haveusedpr otect i
oni fyoudi dn' twantababyapha!Usi l
emt anandi niman!
Me:ButOl ediIknownot hingaboutbei ngaf ather .
Mama:Unf or tunat elyyoudon' tgot oschool forsuchsoyouwi lllearnhowt obeaf at
her,
startingnow.Youwi l
lapol ogi zet oyourwi feandbehappyaboutt henews.
Inodded.
Mama:Ngoku, now!
Ipul l
edPhumit ome.
Me:Iam sor rybabe, Iwasj ustsur prised.Iam sor ryforact ingl i
keaj er k,bei ngpr egnantisnot
abadt hi ng.Act uallyi tsagoodt hi ng, wegoi ngt obepar ents.
ShenoddedsoIwi pedhert ear st henki ssedherf orehead.
Her :Iam r eal lysor r yIknowyoudi dn' twantachi ldnow.
Me:Iam t heonewhoshoul dbesor rynotyou.Wegoi ngt ohaveababy, Iam goi ngt obea
father .Thi si st hemostpr eciousgi f
tyoucoul dhaveevergi venme, don' tfeelsor ryaboutit.
Shesmi led.
Mama:Thatwasn' tsohar d, nowdomeaf avour .Gett estedt omor row.
Me:Wewi ll
.
Mama:That '
sgood.
Me:Weshoul dgetgoi ngngoku, babe?
Shenodded.
Me:St opcr yingkal okst handwasam, itsgoi ngtobeokay.Wear ebot hpr egnant ,sizobar ight
.
Shewi pedhereyest i
lltheywer edr y.
Mama:Letmecal lyourf ather .
Me:Hayimamaj ustt ellhimt hatsi hambi l
e, wewi llseeyout omor r
ow.
Mama:Okayni hambekahl e, uber ightbabyvha?
Phumza:Thankyoumama, nisalekahl e.
Mama:Thankyoubaby.
Theyhuggedt henwewal kedoutt oourcaranddr ovebackt ot heapar t
ment .Wewer ebot h
qui etal lthewayt her e,Ireal l
ywasn' treadyt ohaveababyort obeaf ather .Iwaski ndof
enj oyingbei ngwi t hmywi feqhabutnowt hi ngswer eaboutt ochange, ever ythi ngwasaboutt o
change.WasIr eadyf orthatchange?Whenwegott ot heflatweundr essedandgoti nbed, butt
naked.Ipul l
edhert omeandcuddl edher .
>>mor ni ng...
Iwokeupwi thmywi feinmyar ms, shewassl eepingpeacef ull
ybutt hatdi dn' tst opmef rom
want i
ngt owakeherup.Iki ssedherneckt henpl ayedwi t
hherear ,shemoanedandputherar m
aroundmyneck.Ist oppedandl aughed, uyazi t
handai zintolomf aziwam shame.
Me:Mor ningst handwasam.
Her :Mor ningbabe.
Shet urnedt of aceme, weshar edaki ssleadi ngusnowher e.
Her :Ar eyouangr yt hatImi ghtbepr egnant ?
Me:Nobabe, nomyl oveIam notangr yatyou.I tjusttookmebysur prise.
Her :YouandIbot h.Iam scar edYandi sa, Iknownot hingaboutbei ngamot hert oo.
Me:Thatmakest hebot hofusbutwewi lllear nright?Justl i
kehowwel earntt obeahusband
andawi fe.Wewi lldoi ttoget her.
Her :Ar eyousur e?
Me:Iam posi tivebaby.
Weshar edaheat edki ss, Igotbet weenherl egsandt ookherhands.Ihel dt hem aboveherhead
asshewr appedherl egsar oundme.Iki ssedherneckt heni nsertedmysel f, shemoaned( I
act uallymi ssedhermoan)soIst artedt hr ust i
ngi nandouthert i
ghtvj ay.Gr indi ngonherandi t
feltsogoodt hatIst artedmoani nghername.Iswearever yti
mewi thherf el tlikeourf ir
sttime
maki ngl ove, i
twasexci ti
ng.Shel etmebeati tupanywayIwant edt o, f
ast ,sl ow, rough,gent l
e,
from behi nd, frontorsi deways. .
..Af t
erourt wost eamysessi onswewentf orashower ,
scr ubbi ngeachot her s' backs.Af tershower ingwegotoutt olotionourbodi esandgotdr essed
thenwentf orbr eakf astatwi mpy.Af t
erbr eakf astwedeci dedt ogobuyahomepr egnancyat
clicks, wewer egoi ngt odoi tathomeal lal one.Honest lyIwasr eallyhopi ngi twasaf alse
alar m butwhatwer et hepossi bili
ties?Shewast womont hslateandwewer en' tusi ng
prot ection, butwhywoul dIusepr ot ectionwi t
hmywi fe?MaybeIdi dwantababybutIwas
scar ed.Whatt ypeoff atherwasIgoi ngt obe?
.
.
Phumza:
Wegott ot hef l
atandgotof fafterpar kingt henwentupt oourapar tment ,Iunl ockedand
opened.Yandi sat hr ewhi msel font hecouch.
Him:Babecoul dyoupassmet her emot epl ease.
Ther emot ewasr ighti nfrontofhi m ont hecof feet ablecoul dn'thej ustst ret chandt akei t?Hayi
Qhaweul azyyuh.Igavehi mt her emot et hensatdownnextt ohi m.
Him:Shoul dn'tyoubet aki ngt het ext ?
Me:WhatdoIdowi thi t?
Him:Hahbabeyoupeeoni t.
Me:Andt hen?
Heshr uggedandl ookedatme.
Him:Let sr eadt hei nstructions.
Het ookt heboxandopenedi tthenr eadt heinstr
uctions.
Him:Wewi llwai tf orabout5mi nutesormor e,i
twilltel
lyouhowfaryouarei
fyouar epregnant
.
Andi fyounoti twi llwritenegat i
ve.
Inoddedandgotup.Iwentt ot hebat hroom, hefoll
owedaf terme.
Me:Ngokuwenauyaphi ?
Him:Wedoi ngi tt oget herremember ?
Ishookmyheadandopenedt hebat hroom door ,If
eltalit
tl
eawkwarddoingiti
nfrontofhim
butther ewasnowayofget t
ingr i
dofhi m.
>>10mi ntuesl at er...
"5weekspr eg"
Him:Wepr egnant !Iam goi ngt obeaf atherbabe!
Hiseyesbecamet earyinst antly.
Me:We?
Him:Duh!Kal okwear eone.
Ilaughedasheki ssedmeal lovermyf ace, Yandisathough!
Him:Iam goi ngt obeaf atherbabe, wegoi ngt ohaveababy.
Iwipedhi st ear s, hewi pedmi ne.
Me:YeahIguessso.
Him:OhmyGod!Thankyoubabe, youmademeahusbandnowaf ather
.Youjustcompleted
me, mademeaman.
Hepeckedmyl ips.
Him:Thi si sgr eatnews, Icanscor e!Icandef i
nit
elyscore.
Ilaughedandhi thi sshoul der ,
hel aughedaswel l.
Him:Il oveyou.
Me:Il oveyoumor e.

20
Phumza:
Yandi sa:Babendi yabuyane?
Ilookedathi m, hewasal ldressedup.
Me:Wher ear eyougoi ngatt hishour ?
Itwasj ustafter8h00.
Him:Dr inkswi ththeboys.
Me:Ohokay.
ThoughIdi dn'twanthi mt ogooutIwasn' tgoingt oplayt henaggi ngwi f
eorgi rlfri
endl ikeinthe
movi es, nah-ah.
Him:I '
ll bebackat10h00ne?
Hepeckedmyl i
pst henwal kedout ,Igotupaf terhimt olockt hedoorandswi t
chof ft
hel i
ghts.
AfterthatIwentt oourbedr oom, changedi ntoani ghtdr esst hengotinbedandf ellasleep.
.
.
Yandi sa:
TodaywasChant ell
e's23r dbirthdayandshewast hr
owi ngabashnyanawi thclosef riendsand
fami l
y.MyboysandIhappenedt obei nvitedsowewer egoi ngt ohonourthei nviteandshow
ourf aces, wewer en'tgoi ngtost ayforlong.Justahourmaxt henheadtot hecl ubf orsome
drinks, Ihadsomanyr easonst ocelebr ate.Fir
stlyIwasgoi ngt obeaf ather,secondl yIj ustgot
paidyest er
dayandt hemoneywasgoodsowhynotcel ebr ate?
WhenIgott oChant elle'shouseIpar kedandgotof ft
hent ookoutmyphonet ocal ltheboys
j
ustt oaskt heirwher eabout sbecauseIcoul dn'tspottheircar s.
Mandl a:Wear epar kedi nside,ngenandoda.
Me:Al ri
ghtshar p.
Ihungupt henwal kedi nsidetheyar d, t
hepar tyhadal readyst art
edandi tdidn'tlooklike
somet hingsmal l
.Itwassomet hingbi g,itwaspacked.Ispot tedtheboysbyt hef ir
eandwal ked
overt ot hem.
Me:Gent s!
Wegr eet edourwaywhi chwasbumpi ngshoul der sandf it
s.
Mandl a:Youl ooki ngf reshboy.
Me:AndIf eelf r
esh.
Ifixedmyj acketnott hati tneededf ixingt hough.
Luba:I tmustbet heper ksofmar ryingsomeoneyounghuh?
Theyl aughed.
Me:Hayif ut sekIam youngmysel f.
Mandl a:Sowher ei swi fey?It houghtyouwer egoi ngt oturnupnaye, seei ngthatyouhaven' t
seeneachot heri nweeks.
Ichuckl ed.
Me:Wi feyi sathome, sheneedst orest .
Whenwehear dsi ngi ng, "
Happybi rthday"wet ur nedt olook( whatIsaw, yerrtheki dlooked
good) ,st oppedt alkingandj oinedi n.Whatwoul dbeabi r
thdaycelebr at i
onwi t
houtt hecake?
Shebl ewt hecandl est hencutt hecake, peopl ecl appedandcheer edf orher ,
someshout ing
"speech! ".
Chant elle: OhmyGodf oronceIam outofwor ds.WhenIsentouti nvitesIdidn'tthinkthet urn
upwoul dbesogr eat .Thankyouever yonef orcomi ngandaspeci althankst oaver yspeci al
per sont ome, Yandi sa.
Me:Oh?
Inmymi ndIt houghtshewasgoi ngt oment ionsomeoneel se,mot herorf ather
.Orbet teryeta
boyf ri
end, j
ustnotmesoIwast akenbysur prise.Ismi ledandwaved, shewavedback.
Her :Event houghyoumar riedandal waysbusyyoumanagedt ocomet omypar ty,thankyou.
Andpl easedoenj oyyour sel ves, t
hankyouonceagai n.Djturnupt hemusi candl etthepar ty
begi n!
Itur nedt omyboysassoonasmusi cst artedpumpi ng.
Me:St range.
Lubanzi :Qui teobvi ousshei sstillinl ovewi t
hyou.
Me:Iknow, itsnoteasyonanyoneofus.
Shest illhadt het endencyofcal l
ingj ustt ocheckuponmeandwewoul dt al
knj e.Ididn'thave
thehear ttoi gnor eordr opt hecal lonher ,IfeltthatIhadhur therenough.
Mandl a:Shei scomi ngoverher e.
Me:Shei s?
Mandl a:Yeahdon' tl ook.
HegavemeaAmst elci der ,
Iopenedi tandt ookasi p.WhenIf el
tasof ttaponmyshoul derI
turnedt ol ookather .
Me:Hi , happybi rthday.
Iopenedmyar msf orher , shegotbet weent hem andweshar edahug.
Her :WhydoIgetaf eelingyouwer et alkingaboutme?
Ibr oket hehugandl aughed.
Me:Notatal l.
Shesmi led.
Her :Thi si sf oryou, justt ot hankyouf orcomi ng.
Itookt hesl iceofcaket hatwasonapaperpl at e.
Me:Thankyou.
Her :Si twi thme, yes?
Inoddedandf oll
owedaf terher ,wef oundatqui etspotwher eitwasj ustt hetwoofusandsat
down.Iputmydr inkdownnextt ome.
Her :Sohowi syourwi fe?
Me:Shei sgoodt hanksf oraski ng.
Her :Ar eyouhappywi thher ?
Me:Chant elle. .
.
Her :Foroncei n7year sjustbehonestwi t
hme, please.
Inodded.
Her :Iam gl adt oheart hat.
Me:Thanks, sowoul dyoul i
kesome?
Iwast ryingnott obeawkwar dtowar dher .
Her:Sur e.
Sheopenedhermout handIf edher .Shesmi ledandchewed.
Her:Br ingsbackmemor iesdoesn' tit?
Me:Yeah.
Shel aughedt oher self.
Me:Pl easedoshar et hej oke.
Her:Itsf unnyhowyouneverr emember edmybi r
thday, alwayspi tchedupl atef ormypar ti
es
butyoust illmanagedt of eedmet hef i
rstpi ece.
Me:AndIusedt osweatj ustf oryout oopenyourmout h.
Her:Becauseyoucoul dn'tunder standhowmuchIhadt of i
ghtj usttogetandsavet hatpi ece
forus.
Me:Butyoual waysmanagedt osavei tforusandyouwai tedf orme.
Her:Nomat terhowl ongyout ookt ocome.
Me:Andhowl onghasi tbeennow?
Her:7year s,thisbei ngt he8t hyear .
That '
showl ongwehavebeent oget her,7year s.Wemetbacki nhi ghschoolandshef ellinlove
withmei mmedi at ely,formeshewasj ustanot herhi tandr un.Butshewasn' tli
keanyoft he
girl
sIwaswi thbef oreher ,shewaschal l
engi ng, taughtmehowt obepat i
entandhowt olove.
ButasayoungmanImadeaf ewf lops.Wehadourupsanddowns.Al otoft earswereshed,
brokenpr omi ses, hear t
br eaks, somanyl astchanceswer egi ven.Icausedheral otofpai n,both
emot ional lyandphysi cal ly.Butshest i
llfoundi ti
nhert of orgiveme, Ialwaysadmi r
edherf or
that.Andshewaspr obabl ygoi ngt oforgivemef orthist oo, maybeevenmoveon.Fi ndabet ter
guyt hanme.
Me:Andpr obabl yt hel ast .
Shel ookedatmewi tht ear sinhereyes.
Me:Iam mar riednow. ..weexpect i
ng.
Her:Wow.
Shel ookeddown.
Me:LookChant elle,Iam sor ry.Iam sor ryf oral lthepainIcausedyou.
Her:Al lthoseyear syout houghtyouhur tme, thatwasnot hingcompar edtonow.Your eally
hurtmeYandi sa.
Me:AndIam sor ry.
Shewi pedhercheekst henl ookedatme.
Her:Younevergavemeanswer s.
Me:Younevergavemeachancet oexpl ain.
Her:Youcanexpl ainnow, startingf r
om howl ongyouknewt hatyouwer eget ti
ngmar ried.And
don'tliet ome.
Me:Okay.Remember3year sago, onmy22ndbi rt
hday..
Her:Whenyouhadt ogot oEast ernCapewi thyourdad?
Me:Il ied, itwasn' tt ocel ebr atemybi r
thdaybutt ost ar
tthel obolanegot i
ati
ons.
Her:Thever ysameyearyouaskedmet oter mi nateourpr egnancy?
Inodded.
Me:Iwasn' treadyt ohavea. ..
Shegotupandwal kedawaywi thoutsayi ngawor d.
Me:Chant ell
e!
Igotupt ooandr anaf terher ,itwasnevermyi ntentiontohur ther .Icaughtupwi thherand
pull
edherbyherhand.
Me:HeyChant ..
.
Her:Don' t!Pl ease. ..
Myphoner angi nmypocketbutIi gnor edit.
Me:Iam sor ryokay?Inevermeantt ohur tyou.
Shegavemeonet i
ghtsl apacr ossmyf ace.Idi dn'texpectt hatfrom heratal l,shenever
stoopedt ot hatl evel nomat terhowangr yshewaswi t
hme.
Me:I fitwi llmakeyouf eel anybet ter .
..
Her:Howcoul dIbesost upid? !Youneverl ovedme!Iwasj ust...
Me:Idi dl oveyouandIst i
lldo.
Her:Thenwhy?WhyYandi sa? !
Ishrugged, shesl appedmeagai n.
Me:Iam sor ry.
Shewasaboutt osl apmeagai nwhenIyankedherwhol ear m, ngekekal ok!
Me:Iunder standyouhur tbutdon' tf uckendot hat !
Her:Youunder stand? !Youunder stand? !Younevergott oexper i
enceal lthepai nIwentthrough,
3mi scar riagesYandi sa!3andal l becauseofyou!Doyouhaveanyi deahowmuchpai nIhadto
got hroughbecauseofyou? !Doyou? !
Shepokedmychest .
Me:Iam sor ryokay?
Her:Youdon' tgett oapol ogi zeanymor e, youdon' t!
Me:I fIcoul dundoanyt hing, i
fIcoul dIwoul dbutIcan' t.Al lIcandoi sapol ogize.
Her:Ican' thavechi ldrenanymor eYandi saandi fIhadnott erminatedt hosepr egnancies,i
fI
didn'thavet hosemi scar riagesmaybeImi ghtbeabl etohavechi l
drenbutIcan' t.
..Ican'
t.
Ididn'tknowwhatt osaysoIj ustembr acedher ,atf i
rstshef oughtmebutatt heendshegave
i
nandcr iedi nmyar mst illshewasal lcr i
edout .Whenshehadst oppedcr yingIunwr appedmy
armsar oundherandcuppedherf ace.
Me:Inevermeantf ort hingst ogett hisugl y.
Shenodded.Iki ssedherf or eheadt henwi pedhercheeks, hermakeupwasal lmessy.The
blackt hing, mascar awasal loverherf ace.
Me:Iam sor ryf orr uiningyourmakeup.
Agai nshenodded.
Me:Whenwel ostthosepr egnanci es,Iwashur tt oo.
Her:Don' tplease.
Me:Youknowhowbadl yIwant edt ohaveachi ldwi t
hyou.
Her:Butyouaskedmet ot ermi nat e.
Me:Butweagr eedChant el le,weagr eedt ot ryforababywhenwewer ebot hdoneatschool .
Andt hat '
swhatwedi dbutunf or tunat elyt heywer en'tsuccessf ul.
Her:Becauseofyou, ifyouwer en' tcheat i
ngandst ressingmeout .
Me:Iknow.
Her:Youknownot hingYandi sa.
Shesl appedmyhandsawayf rom herf ace.
Her:Youshoul dpr obabl ygot oyourwi fenow.
Me:Ar eyougoi ngt obeokay?
Her:Yeah.
Me:Ar eyousur ebecauseIcan. ..
Her:Hol dme?
Iopenedmymout htospeakbutwor dsf ailedme.
Her:Iam j oking, youcango.Iwi l
l bef ine.
Me:Pr omi se?
Her:Ipr omi se, justgoal ready.
Me:Hug?
Her:No.
Me:Comeon.
Shel aughedasIpul ledherar msandwr appedt hem ar oundme, Iwr appedmi near oundheras
well.
Me:Iwi l
lal wayscar eaboutyou.
Her:Andyouwi llalwaysl oveme?Ar ghpl easedon' tpatroni zeme!
Ichuckl edasshebr oket hehug.
Her:Got oyourwi f
e.
Me:Youj ustcan' twai ttogetr idofmer ight ?
Her:Becauseyour ui ningmymakeup.
Me:Okaysor ry,letmehel pyougetcl eanedupt henIwi llgo.
Shenodded, weusedt hebackdoort ogoi nsidet hehouseandupt oherr oom.Shet ook
everythingsheneededandwewentt othebat hroom, Isatont heclosedt oil
etseatandwat ched
herwasht henputonmakeup.WhenshewasdoneIgotupandwewal kedout .
Her :Thankyou.
Me:Nopr obl em.
Ikissedhercheekt henwentdownst airsandt owher eIleftthegents.Isatdownandt ooka
beerf rom Mandl a.
Mandl a:Wher edi dyouandt hebi rthdaygi r
ldi sappeart o?It ri
edtocal lyou.
Me:Wewer ejustt al king.
Him:About ?
Me:St uf f.
Him:St uf flike?
Me:Per sonalst uf f.
Him:AahIseeyoudon' twantt oshar enow.
Ilaughed.
Me:Youdon' tlikebei ngl ef tinthedar khuh?
Him:That 'sbecauseIknowwhenyouandChant elle"talk"sheendsupi nhospi t
al.
Me:Nott hi st i
me, wedi dn' tdot hatt ypeoft alking.
Him:IhopesobecauseIwoul dhat etoseehert hereagai n.
Me:Idon' tneedoneofyourl ectures,Ij ustneedadr ink.
Him:Younevert reat edherr i
ght.
Me:Ngoku? !Andi t
hindi yat shot hatIdon' tneedal ecturef rom you?
Him:Heyshootmef ort ry....
Me:Hayiman!Yout alkl i
keawoman!
Him:Sundi qhel akwedi ni!
Me:Hayif utsek!
Him:Fut seknawe!Saphai beeryam f ut hi.
Hegr abbedi toutofmyhand, Ichuckl edandt ookabeerf rom thecoolerbox.
.
Wespentt her estoft heni ghtatChant ell
e'shouseget ti
ngwast edandhi gh, wepart
iedtil
l5in
themor ning.Eyt hepar tywasbangi ng, themusi c,theboozeever ything.Wheni twastimet o
l
eavewehadal readysober edupsowegoti nourcar sanddr oveinsepar ateways.
.
.
Phumza:
Iwaswokenupbyal oudknockont hedoor , Igrabbedmyphonet ocheckt heti
me.Itwas5h30,
Igotoutofbedandwentt ot hefrontt ogett hedoor .
Him:Heybabe.
Hel eanedi nf oraki ssbutIpushedhi sf aceback.
Me:I st hi s10h00Yandi sa?
Him:Il ostt r
ackoft imebabesor r
y.
Me:Yousmel lofashebeen.
Him:Sor rymyl oveI '
llhaveashower .
Me:Hmmm. ..
Ilefthim byt hedoorandwentbackt obed.Af teraf ewmi nutesIhear dwat err
unninginthe
bathroom.Af t
er10mi nut esi twentsi lentandhewal kedi ntoourr oom, l
otionedhisbodyt hen
goti nbed.
Him:Iam sor ryst handwasam.
Me:Youpr omi sednevert ocomehomei nthatst at
eYandi sa.
Him:Butbabeuyazinj et hatIwentf ordr inkswi t
ht heboys.
Me:YesIknowbut ...
Him:AndIhadashower ,Ievenbr ushedmyt eethbabe.Sor r
yanest handwasam?Ndi zamile
ukunganuki .
Ichuckl edandputhi sar m overmywai st.
Him:Soam If orgi ven?
Me:I fyoupr omi senevert ocomehomeekuseni uhambengaphezol o.
Him:Ipr omi semyl ove.
Me:Thenyouf or given.
Him:Thankyou.
Iki
ssedhershoul
dert
hencl
osedmyeyesandf
ellasl
eep.

21
Yandi sa:
Iwaswokenupbyacal lfrom mom, shewasi nvit
ingusoverf orSundayl unch.SoIgotoutof
bed, grabbedat owelandwr appedi tar oundmywai stthenwentt ot hef r
ont .Phumiwasi nthe
kit
chencooki ng.
Me:Heybabe. .
Her:Heymyl ove.
Iwal kedovert ogi veheraki ss.Wej ustbabyki ssed.
Her:Yourbr eakf asti si nt hemi cr owave.
Me:Thankyoumyl ove.( Itookmyf oodf r
om t hemi crowave)Mom cal ledt oinvit
eusoverf or
l
unch.
Her:ButIam al readycooki ngusl unch.
Me:Wecanhavei tf ordi nnerl at er.
Her:Okayl etmef ini shher ethenIcangetr eady.
Me:Al ri
ghtSt handwasam.
Iwentt osi tinf rontoft het vandst artedeat i
ng.
"Chant ell
ecal led"
Me:Cha- what ?
Iturnedt ol ookather ,Iwant edt oseeherf aci alexpression.Shewasn' tevenl ookingatme.
Her:It houghtyousai dyouwer egoi ngt oacl ubwi thyourboys.
Me:Yeahi twasherbi r t
hdayandshei nvi t
edus, whatel sedidshesay?
Her:Shewasj ustcal l
ingt ochecki fyougothomesaf elyandt hankyouf orgoi ngtoherpar ty.
Me:Oht hatwast hought fulofher .
Her:Sheaskedmet ot ellyout ocal lherwhenyouawake.
Me:Okay.
Her:Sodoesshedot hisf oral lofyouguys?
Me:Dowhat ?
Her:Cal ltochecki fyougothomesaf ely?
Me:Ye- yeah.
Her:Ar eyousur e?
Me:Yesbabekut heniyoudon' tt rustme?
Her:Kant iwhatdi dIsay?
Me:Not hing.
Her:Hmmm. ..Iam al mostdoneher e.
Me:Okaymyl ovel etmegohaveaqui ckshowerne?
Her:Uhmm. ..
Igotupt oputt hepl atei nt hesi nkt henwentt othebat hroom,st ar
tingatt hebedr oom formy
phone.Idi alledChant elle'snumber ,shepi ckedupont he2ndr ing.
Me:St opcal lingmyphone.
Her:What ?
Me:Youhear dme, doyouwantmywi fet ost artaskingquest i
onsaboutyou?
Her:Iam sor ry.
Me:Hayi !
Idroppedt hecal landt hrewt hephoneont hebed, thenwentt ohaveaqui ckshower .Chantell
e
thi
nksshecanj ustcal landmakeaconvowi t
hmywi f
engoku?Hai bo!Af tershower ingI
l
otionedt hengotdr essedi napai rofbl ackj eans,vestandwhi tet-shirt
.Iputonmybl ack
addidaski ckst henwentt othef ront .
Me:Babeawuqhi bi ?
Her:Iam goi ngt of reshenupnowt henwecango.
Me:Ihat ewai ting.
Her:Iknow, ndi yeza.
Shewal kedt ot hebat hroom soIsatdownandchannelhoppednj et il
lshecamebackdr essed
i
nal ongpenci lski rtandpeacht opwi thsandal s.
Her:Wecangonow.
Me:Hmm l ooki ngbeaut iful.
Her :Ihavet oi mpr ess.
Ismi l
edandgotup, tookherhandandwewal kedoutt hendownst airst oourcar .Iopenedt he
doorf orher .
Her :Thankyou.
Me:I t
sonl yapl easur e.
Iclosedt henwentt ogetont hedr iver'
sseat .Istartedt heengi net hendr oveof f.
.
WhenwegothomeIpar kedt henwegotof f.It ookherhandandwewal kedi nhandi nhand.
Me:Mol weni ,Ihopewear enotl ate.
Mama:Notatal l
, infactyouj usti ntime.
Me:Ohgr eatbecausewehavesomenewswewoul dl iketoshar ewi thyou.
Il
ookedatPhumza, shesmi ledandnodded.
Me:Wepr egnant .
Zet hu:What ?!OMG! !
Tat a:HayiZet huukusi fundekel a.
Wel aughed.
Mama:Congr atul ati
onsbant wanabam.
Shehuggedus.
Tat a:Congr atulat ionsnyana, makot isiyabonga.Hayini sebenzi l
e,thankyou. Yandisathat '
show
weZi zimendoi tke, asi yilandikude.
Il
aughed.
Mama:Hayit at akhe( hel aughed)l etsgot ot het able.
Weexci tedl ywentt osi tar oundt het able,ever yonewasecst aticaboutt henews.Theywer e
genui nel yhappyf orus, especi allymom anddad.Mom wasal readyt alkingaboutal lthet hings
shewasgoi ngt odof ort hebabyandshe/ hewasn' tdueanyt i
mesoo.Wehadt owai tfort he
next8mont hst obr inganaddi tionalmembert otheDl ami nif ami l
y.Someonet heycoul dspoi l
becausewewer eal lt oool dfort hat .
.
Anywayaf terl unchIdeci dedt ogot oMandl a'shouse, hesentmeat extwhi lewewer est il
l
eat i
ngi nvi tingmef orabr aai .Theywer ehavi ngaf ami l
ybr aaiandhewant edmet ohel phi m
braai .WhenIgott her eIwentt ot hebackyar dbecauset hat'swher et hesmokewascomi ng
fr
om, Lubanzi andsomeofMandl a'scousi nswer et herewi thhi m braying.
Me:Looksl i
keyoudon' tneedmyhel p.
Mandl a:Hayi suka, ushar p?
Me:Topsout tieyam wena?
Him:Shar p,wantsomet hi ngt odr i
nk?
Me:Justabeerndoda.
Him:Comi ngr i
ghtup, Yongamagogetust wobeer sphaendl ini.
Yongama:Okaybhut i.
Her ani nsi det ogetourbeer s, wesatdownoncampchai r
sandengagedi nmul ti
ple
conver sat i
ons, talkingaboutourpast ,
pr esentandf ut ure.Allt hingshappeni ngi nourl i
vesnj e
ti
lllateandIhadt of et chmywi feandt akeherhome.
.
.
Phumza:
Mondaymor ningIwokeupear lyt ohel pmyhusbandpr eparef orwor k, whilehewentf ora
showerIi ronedhi sout fi
tf ort hedayt henmadehi m br eakfast .Af t
erdr essinguphecamet othe
ki
t chenandsatont heki tchenhi ghchai r,Igavehi m hi splateoff ood.
Him:Thankyoumyl ove.
Me:Jui ceorcof fee?
Him:Cof feemyl ove.
Imadehi m acupofcof feej ustt hewayhel ikesi t
,bl ackandt wosugar s.ThenIgavei ttohi m.
Him:Youar eadar li
ng.
Ismi l
edandcl eanedt hemessImadei nt heki tchen, washi ngt hedi shest oo.Af tereati
ngIt ook
hisdi shesandwashedt hem.
Him:Thatwasdel iciousst handwasam, thankyou.
Me:I twasapl easur e.
Heki ssedmycheekt henwentt oourr oom f orhi swor kbag, keysandphone.Thencameback
tokissme, weshar edal ongki ssnj eleadi ngusnowher e.Webr okeitaf t
erawhi l
e.
Him:I 'l
lseeyoul ater .
Me:Haveagoodday.
Him:Thankyoubabe.
Hepeckedmyl ipst hent ookhi sbagandwal kedt othedoor .
Him:Ndi yakut handavha?
Me:Thandanam.
Hebl ewmeaki sst henwal kedout .Isighedoutl oudl ythencont i
nuedcl eaning, changingthe
curtainsandourbeddi ng.Iwashedt hem t hent ookt hem tot heli
neout side,afterhangingthem
Iwentbacki nsideandwentf orabat h.Af terbat hingandget t
ingdressedImademysel f
somet hi
ngt oeatandsatdownt oeat .AfterIdi dt hedi shest hendecidedt ocal lmom, Ihaven't
spokent othem i nawhi l
enowsoImi ssedt hem.Shet ookt hecallbef oreIdr oppedi t
.
Her:Hel loPhumzamt anam.
Me:El omama, howar eyou?Ar eyougood?
Her:Si phil
il
enokoevent houghyourf atheri snotwel l.
Me:What '
swr ongwi t
hhi m?
Her:Hi ssugarl evelwashi ghsowashi sBP, hei sinhospi t
alaswespeak.
Me:Hayimamawhathappened?
Her:Itsnot hingt owor ryaboutmt anam.
Me:Ohhayi mama.Howi shenow?
Her:Hei sbet ternowandget t
ingdi schar gedkusasa.
Me:That '
sgoodnews, howi sBulelwa?Howi sshedoi ngi nschool?Isshehel pingaroundt he
house?
Her:Ohhayiyoursi steruyamazi unj ani,ever yonei st al
kingaboutherandherbadbehavi our.
Yourf atherisi nhospi talnjenguye.
Me:Ohhayi mamaIwi llt
alkt ohershecan' twor rydadesazit hathei sn'twell.
Her:Youwoul dhavehel pedus, shedoesn' tli
stent ousanymor e.
Me:Iwi l
ltalkt oher ,buzzmewhenshei sbackf rom school .
Her:Iwi lldosobaby, t
hankyou.
Me:Hayiakukhont omama.
Her:Itsgoodhear ingyourvoi ce,i
sever ythingokay?
Me:Ewemama, Ihavenewsf oryouanddad.Iam pr egnant .
Her:Yoh!Ni ni ntombi ?
Me:Ndi na5weeksmama.
Her:Oht hosear egoodnewsmt anam, Iam sur eyouri nlawsar eecstat ic.
Me:Theyar emama.
Her:Butbabyngobasewudeumi thawhati syourhusbandsayi ngaboutt hetradit
ionalwedding?
West i
llwaitingt ohearf rom hi sfami ly.
Me:Ihavenoi deamama, kusat hulekile.
Her:Hayikal okPhumzayouhavet odoi t,sikesi hlekenat hi.Causeast areaphael al
ini
, kwazi
we
thatyouar emar ri
ed.
Me:EwemamaIwi llt
al ktohi m abouti t.
Her:Good.Ut hi....
Wecont inuedt alkingaboutanyt hingandever ything, l
aughi ngandsi ngi ng.Ther eisnothingthat
cheer edmom upl ikehear ingmesi ngi ng.

22
Yandisa:
Iwalkedoutoftheoff
iceat20h00, Ihadaver yl
ongandbusydayt ot
all
ylosttr
ackoft i
me.I
hadbackt obackmeetingswithmyboss, cl
ientsandteam, appar
entl
ytheycont r
actedafew
probl
emsonsi tewhil
et heywerebuildi
ngsoIhadt ocomeupwi t
hsoluti
onsandassur ethe
cl
ientsthatwehaditallundercontr
ol.Notonl ydidIhavetoconvincethecli
entsbutmyboss
aswel l
,Ievenhadt
osi gnawr i
ttenwarningf or"
abandoning"myt eam i
nthemi ddleofthe
project.Tal kaboutamessedupday.Iwal kedoutoft heli
ftandt omycar ,asIwasappr oaching
i
t,from adi st anceInot icedt woguysl eani ngagai nstmycar ,
nakundi qhelwa!Iuppedmypace
alittl
e, IstoppeddeadwhenInot icedwhoi twas.Jer ome? !Jeromewasa39yearol dsl i
m but
fi
tlooki ngguy.
Him:Ar en' tyouhappyt oseeme?Comecl oser .
Iswal lowedspi tandt ookacoupl eofst epst owardshi m,heopenedhi sar msf ormeandwe
shar edaqui ckmanl yhug.
Him:Younevercamet oseeme.
Me:Becauseyoucutmeof f.
Hechuckl ed.
Him:Ial waysl i
kedyouf oryourqui ckr esponse.
Me:Sur e,whendi dyoucomeout ?
Him:TodayonPar ole.
Me:That '
sgr eat ,yourdaught erandwi f
emustbet hrill
ed.
Him:Theydon' tknowt hatIam outyet ,IthoughtIshoul dcomeseeyouf ir
st.Iseeyouhave
donever ywel lforyour self.
Hesai dl ooki ngar ound.
Me:Idon' townt his, Iwor kher e.
Him:Theymustwor kyoul ikeasl ave, thisi snot i
met ogohome.
Me:Il ostt rackoft ime.
Him:Youbet tergetgoi ngt henbutexpectacal lfr
om me, wehaveal otofcat chingupt hatwe
needt odo.
Me:Mostdef i
ni tely.
Him:Sendmyl ovet oyourwi fe, shei sbeaut iful
.
Me:Ihopeyoudi dn' tgot omypl acean. ..
Him:Ihadr easont o. ..butIdi dn't ,wai tformycal l
.
Ilookedathi mj ustt ryi ngt of igur eouthi semot ions, heseemedcal m andcol lected.He
woul dn' tdosomet hi ngst upi donhi sf i
rstdayout ,woul dhe?Butwi thJer omeonecanneverbe
sure, hewasoverpr ot ect i
veofhi sdaught er .Hewoul dhur tanyonewhohur therandI
happenedt obet heonl yonewhodi dr ealdamaget ohersoIhadr easont obescar ed.Sor ight
afterhegoti nt ohi scarIswi t
chedonmyphoneandcal l
edPhumzaj usttocheckonher ,she
tookt hecal lal mosti mmedi ately.Igoti nt hecarandst art
eddr i
ving.
Her :Hey, wantmet oopenf oryou?
Me:Keept hedoorl ocked, don' topenf oranyone.I '
llcallyouwhenIam r ightbyt hedoor .
Her :Ithoughtyouwer eatt hedooral ready.
Me:Iam al mostt her emyl ove, justkeept hedoorl ocked.Don' topenf oranyoneunl essi tsme.
Her :Okayyouscar ingme, what 'sgoi ngon?
Me:Not hingmyl ove, Idi dn'tmeant oscar eyousor ry.
Her :Okaymyl ovej ustgethomeal ready.
Me:Iam par kingnowI '
llcomeupi nami nut e.
Her :OkayI 'llwar m upyourf ood.
Me:Okaymyl ove, I'
llcal lyouj ustnow.
.
Ihungupandpar kedi nmygar aget hengotof fandt ookmybel ongings, l
ockedt henwentupt o
myapar tment .WhenIwasatt hedoorIcal l
edher ,sheopenedi mmedi at
elyasi fshewas
wai ti
ngbyt hedoor .Shewasst il
l inper fectcondi ti
onandal lIwant edt odowashol dandki ss
andher .
Me:Heybabesor ryf orbei ngl at e.
Shewr appedherar msar oundmyneckandki ssedmyl i
ps..
.okay.
Me:Someonei si naf reakymood.
Iwr appedmyl eftar m ar oundherwai standpi ckedherup, shequi cklywr appedherl egsaround
mywai st.Iwasgl adt hatmywi fewasokay, thatJer omehasn' tbeent oourhome.Iwasshi tt
ing
mysel faphat hi nkinghepai dheral ittl
evi sit.
Her :Ijustmi ssedyou.
Icar ri
edheri nandki ckedt hedoorshut ,t
hr ewever ythingIhadi nmyr i
ghthandont hecouch
thenwr appedmyar m ar oundher .
Me:It hinkIshoul dcomehomel at eever yni ght.
Her :Ndi kuphoxe.
Ilaughedandki ssedher .
Her :Youshoul deatf irst ,Iam sur eyouhungr y.
Me:Hungr yforyou.
Ikissedherneckandshegi ggl ed, Ideci dedt otaket histot hebedr oom.Il ai
dheront hebedbut
shesatupt ounbut tonmyshi r t,shedi ditsl owly.Onebut tonaf tertheother,slowlyandher eI
wast hinkingshewant edmer ightnow.
Her :Whatkeptyout illlat e?
Me:Ihadt ocat chuponsomewor k.
Her :Thenwhydi dn'tyoucal l tol etmeknow?
Me:Idi dn' tplant owor kt il
llat e, Ijustl osttrackoft i
me.
Her :Real l
y?
Shet ookof ftheshi rtandki ssedmyneck, thatf eltgood.
Me:Hmmm. .
.
Sheunt uckedmyvestt henpul ledi tupandoutofmybody.
Her :Whywasyourphoneof f?
Sheki ssedmychestassheundi dmybel t.
Me:If or gotthatIswi tchedi tof fwhenIwasi nameet i
ngwi t
hmyboss, Ihadal ongandbusy
daybabe.Ihadt osignawr ittenwar ning, meetmyt eam andt r
yt ofindoutwhathappenedand
howwasIgoi ngt ofixt hepr obl em t heycont ract edwhi l
ebui l
ding.
Shest oppedandl ookedatmef orawhi lewi thoutsayi ngawor d.
Me:What '
sup?
Her :Iloveyou.
Me:Il oveyout oobabe.
Ikissedherl ips, j
ustapeckt hent ookof fherni ghtdr ess,foll
owedbyherpant y.Iundr essedas
wellt henpushedheronherbed, tookherl egsandwr appedt hem aroundmywai stthen
i
nser tedmysel f...
.
Iwokeupt oat ext,itread;" meetmef orlunchat2"It ossedt hatphoneasi deandki ssedmy
beaut ifulwi fe.
Her :Hey. .
.
Me:Heyboo, lastni ghtwasamazi ng.
Her :AndIwoul dn'tmi ndar epeatofi t.
Ichuckl edandki ssedher .
Me:Met oobutIhavet ogetr eadyf orwor k, Ihaveabusydayaheadofme.
Isai dget t
ingoutofbed.
Her :Whatar eyouwear i
ngt oday?
Itookoutabl ackl ongsl eevet -shi rtandbl ackski nnyj eans.Shegotoutofbedandt ookt hem
soIwentt ohaveashower .Af tershower i
ngIgotoutt olotionandgetdr essed, Iworeboot s
becauseIwasgoi ngonsi t
et henwentt ot hef r
ontt oeat .Mybr eakfastwasr eady,aftereat i
ngI
gotupandputt hepl at eint hesi nk.
Phumza:Babe
Me:Myl ove?
Her :Ndi cel aimal iyokwenzai nhl oko.
Me:Doyouevenknowwher et hesal oni s?
Sheshookherhead, Il aughedandgavehermyot hercar dandt hepin.
Me:AskOl wet hut ot akeyouaf terhercl ass.
Phumzawasn' tgoi ngt ovar si tyt hisyear ,shecanonl ygonextyearbecausei twasj usttool at
e
forhert or egisterwi thUCT.
Her :Thankyou, I'
llaskher .
Me:OkaybabeIhavet ogonow, ndi zokubonal at er.
Her :Comebackear l
yt oday, Idon' tl i
keyouwor ki nglate.
Me:Iwi l
lmyl ove.
ShenoddedsoIwentt ot hebat hr oom t or i
nsemymout hwi t
hLi sterinet
henwentt othef ront,
tookmyst ufffrom t hecouch.
Me:Il oveyou.
Iwentt ogi veheraki ss.
Her:Iloveyout oo.
Webabyki ssedt henIki ssedherf oreheadandwal kedt ot hedoort hendownst ai
rstomycar .I
unlockedgoti nanddr ovet owor k.
.
.
Phumza:
Rightaf terhel ef tIcleaned, hadabat ht hencal ledOl wethu.Shesai dshewoul dbedoneby12
soIwentt owai tforheri nfrontofthet v,eatingchi psandwat chi ng'TheReal '.Iwasdisturbed
byaknockont hedoor ,Icheckedt het imeonmyphone.I twaswayt ooearlyforOlwethut obe
herebutIgotupandwentt oopen.At allcolouredmanst oodatt heot hersideofthedoor .
Me:Hi
Him:Hi i
syourhusbandi n?
Me:Myhusband?
Hel aughedr eveal inggol dteeth,hehadwayt oomanyf ormet ocount .
Him:Wontyoui nvitemei n?
Me:Whyshoul dI?
Him:BecauseIam af riendofYandi sa.
Me:HowcomeIhavenevermetyou?
Him:Wear eol dwor kcol l
eagues.
Me:Iam sor rybutIcan' tinvit
eyoui n,myhusbandi sn'
thome.
Him:OhIshoul dhavecal ledt ochecki fhewasi n,
thankyou.
Me:Nopr obl em.
Him:Haveagooddayma' am.
Inoddedandcl osedt hedoor .Thenwentt osi tdownandf i
nishmypacketofchi ps.At12:30
Olwethucal l
edt ot ellmet omeetherdownst ai r
ssoIgotupandf reshenedupt hentookmybag
andphone, l
ockedt hedoort henwentdownst ai
rs.Shewaswai tingf ormer ightacrossthe
str
eet, Icrossedovert ohersi de.
Me:Hey
Weshar edaqui ckhug.
Her:Hey, Ihopeyou' llbuymesomet hingt oeat .
Me:Nopr obl em.
Her:Hemusthavegi venyoual otofmoney.
Me:Hegavemet his.
Ishowedher ,shesnat chedi toutofmyhand.
Her:OHMYGOD! !Howdi dyougett his?
Me:Hegavei ttome.
Her:How?Whatdi dyoudot ohi m?
Il
aughedkant iwasn' thesupposedt ogiveitt ome?
Me:Whatdoyoumean?
Her:Thi si sgr eatkal ok, wecanevengoshoppi ngpl usther eisthisshoet hatIsaw.
Me:HayiOl wet hu.
Her:Udl alakanci nci wena.TodayI 'l
lteachyouhowt ospendyourman' smoney.
Me:Hayiwet hu.
Isnatchedt hecar dbackandwegotat axi.
Her:What ?
Me:Ihavecl othes, Iwontwast emoneyont hi ngsIdon' tneed.
Her:Hayisukawet hu, spendhi smoneyxaenayo.
Me:No.
Her:Whynot ?
Me:That 'sjustsowr ong.
Her:Ifyoudon' tspendhi smoneywhowi ll
?
Il
aughed, hayi uOl wet hu!

23
Phumza:
Whenwegott ot hemal lwewentt ogetaweavef ormysel fthenheadedt ot hesal ont ogetmy
hairdone.Theywashedmyhai randt reat edi tt henputont heweave, Br azili
annat uralst r
aight.
AndImustsayIl ikedt hewayIl ookedwhent heywer edone, beaut if
ulandYandi sawassur ely
goingt obei mpr essedbyt hi
sl ook.Evenhi ssi sterwasi mpr essed, Ilookedbeaut iful .Ol wet hu
managedt oconvi ncemet ogetournai lsdonesowehadamaniandpedi cur e,weal sohadour
eyebr owswaxedi ntoshape.Ihadneverexper i
encedt hatmuchofpai ni nmyl ife, i
twaswor se
thanget ti
ngmyvi rginitybr oken.Af t eral loft hatIset tledt hebi llandwewentt ogett akeaways
atst eers, twobur germeal s.Thenaf terwewentf oral i
ttlegr ocer yshoppi ngatpi cknpay, Ijust
want edsomej unkf oodwewer er unni ngoutphaendl ini .Iateever yt imeIwasbor ed, Ihad
nothi ngbet tert odoal lday.Igotchi ps, sweet s,chocol at es, acake. ..
Olwet hu:WhoaIdon' tseeanyt hi ngheal thyapha, you' l
lgetf atbef oreyouevenst ar tshowi ng.
Me:Hayiwet hukhayeke.
Her :Noser i
ousl yyoushoul dwat chyourwei ghtandheal th.
Me:YohYandi saneverdoest hi s.
Her :Becausehespoi lsyou.
Shepushedt het rol l
eyt ot hef rui tsi de, sheputappl es, peer s, wat ermel on, bananasand
strawber ri
esi nthet rolley.Shet ookoutaci ddr inksandt ookf r
ui tjuicesandmi l
k.
Her :Nowt hisi sabi theal thy.
Shet ookoutaf ewpacket sofsweet sandpushedt het rolleyt ot het il
l.Weset tledt hei tems
thenwentt ogetat axi t
ot heapar tment .
.
.
Yandi sa:
Exact lyat2h00myphonebeeped, Icheckedi t.Itwasamessagef r
om t hesamenumbert hat
sentmeamessaget hi smor ni ngt el l
ingmewher ewewer emeet i
ng." Mci m! ",Itossedt hat
phoneasi deandt ookadeepbr eat ht hendr ankmycof f eet ocal m myner ves.Thel astt imeI
sawJer omewas6year sagowhenhewentt oj ail,whenIpr omi sedt ol oveandpr ot ecthi s
daught erthever ysamewayhedi dandi fheknewsomet hingaboutourr elationshi pIwas
probabl yadeadman.Myl ifewasover , Iwasshi ttingmypant sj ustt hinki ngabouthi m andal l
thet hingshewascapabl eofdoi ngt ome.
Me:Hecl ear lyhasnot hi ngbet tert odowi thhi st ime.
Mandl a:Jer ome?
Me:Yeahhewant smet omeethi m athi shousef ora" dr ink",Idon' tthinkhewant st osi tand
haveachatwi thmeoveradr ink.Hei sgoi ngt odr inkmybl ood, Iwontgett oseet hebi rt
hofmy
childorevenseehi m/ hergr ow.
Him:St opt hi nkingt hewor standj ustgoseehi m, hearwhathehast osay.
Me:Doyout hinkhewant st oshakemyhandandsayt hankyouf ormessi ngupmydaught er?
No!Hewi l
lki l
l mywi feandt henki llme.
Him:Notonl ydi dyoubr eakhi sdaught er'shear t,youbr okeyourpr omi set ohi m.Youknow
whatpr omi sesmeant ohi m.
Me:Soyousayi ngIdeser vei t? !Buti twasn' tmyi nt ention.
Him:Letmesee, shehadt woabor t
ions, threemi scar ri
agest henyoul ef ther .Youri nt ent i
ons
aboutherwer epr et tycl earf rom t hest ar t,youneverl ovedher .Andi fheknowsal loft hatt hen
youdi ed.
Me:Mci m! !
Him:Iwasj ustsayi nghewontbuyt hatst or y,thinkofsomet hi ngbet terbef oregoi ngt here.
Igotupandt ookmykeysandphone.
Him:Goodl uckbr o.
Me:Fuckyou!
Hel aughedasIwal kedoutoft heof ficeonsi teandt omycar ,Igotonanddr ovet oChant ell
e's
house.
.
WhenIgott hereIpar kedacr osst hest reett hengotof fandcr ossedt her oad.Iopenedt hegat e
andwal kedi nt hencl osed.Andwal kedt ot hedoor , Iknockedandwai ted.Af t
er30secondsor
sot heguyhewaswi thl astni ghtopenedt hedoorandl etmei n.
Him:Fol lowme.
Inoddedandf ol l
owedaf terhi m, hel eadust hrought heki tchen.Chant elle'smot herwasi nthe
kit
chenwashi ngt hedi shes.
Me:GooddayMr sAdams.
Shedi dn' tgr eetmeback, shedi dn'tevenl ookatme.Nott hatIwassur pr isedaf t
erwhat
happenedwi thChant elle.Theguycont i
nuedt ot hebackyar d,Iguesst hat '
swher eJer omewas
soIf ollowed.AsIst eppedoutt hedoorIf eltahar dobj ecthi tagai nstmyf oreheadsohar dthat
i
tmademedi zzyandal lIcoul dseewer est ars.Myhear tstar t
edpoundi ngoutofmychest ,
thought sofdeat hr ushi ngt hr oughmymi nd.Ir ubbedmyeyesandshookmyheadt henl ooked
athim, t
her ewer ef ourguyswi thhi m.Twohadgol fst icksi nt hei rhandsandt heot hert wohad
met albasebal lbat s, Iaccept eddef eatinstant ly.
"Sit!
",hepoi ntedt oachai r.Ishookmyhead.
Me:Ir at herst and.
Hewal kedovert omeandpunchedmef ourt i
mesi nmyst omach, Icoughedashepul ledme
towar dst hechai r.
Him:Isai dsi t!
Heshovedmedownt hechai r.AsIsatdownIf eltwar ml i
qui dt ri
cklingdownmyf ace, Iwipedi t
withmyl efthand.I twasbl ood, Iwasbl eedi ng.
Him:Don' twor ryaboutt hati tsj ustasmal lcut ,nothingPhumzacan' tnur se.
Icoughedandcl ear edmyt hr oatt ospeakbuthepunchedmer ightonmymout h.I tf eltli
kea
bri
ckj usthi tmebuti twasj ustapunch.If eltbloodi nmymout hsoIspi tted.
Me:Youcanki l
lmebutpl easedon' thur tmywi fe,pleasespar eher .
Hesmi ledandpunchedmet hriceonmymout handnose, Ibl edi mmedi ately.
Him:Ipai dheral ittl
evi sittodayandImustadmi t,
shei saf inel ookingwoman.
Me:Leaveheroutoft his!!
Him:Hasani nnocentl ooki ngf ace, innocenteyes, youngandsexy.Andhervoi ce, itmademe
wantt odot hingst oher .
Me:Pl ease. ..
Him:Hesai dpl ease.
Thesmi l
ehehadonhi sf acedi sgust edandpi ssedmeof f.Itmademewantt ot ellhi m wher eto
getof f,Iwasn' tgoi ngt obegt hisman.Ihadt obest rongandst andupt ohi m, atleastdi eaman.
Icouldn' tpr esentmysel fasweak, hewasenj oyingever ymi nut eofmyweakness.
Me:FUCKYOU! !Doyouhearme? !Fuckyou! !
Hel aughed.
Him:Doesshel ikei tf astorsl ow?Roughorgent l
e?
Me:Youdar et ouchher .
..!
!
Him:Whatwi l
lyoudo? !Huh? !
Hepunchedmesever altimesonmyf ace, Icoul dfeelcut sandbl oodonmyeyel i
ds.
Him:Whati fsomeonehur ther ?Roughedherupal i
ttle?Thesamewayyouhur tmydaught er,
scarherf orl ife!
Me:Pl easel eaveheroutoft his, please.
Him:Iwar nedyouabouthur ti
ngmydaught er!Iwar nedyou!Butyoust illwentr ightaheadand
hurtheranyways!Comeher eboy.Canyouseet hisboyst andi ngi nfrontofyou?
Itri
edt oopenmyeyesbutmyeyel i
dswer eheavy, myheadf eltheavy.It hinkIwasgoi ngt o
passout , Icoul dl iteral lyfeel t
hatmymi ndwassl owl yswi tchingof f
.Maybehenot icedt hattoo
becausehet hr ewi cecol dwat erovermyhead, Isnappedoutofi tandl ookedathi m.He
roughedmeupaf ewmor et i
mes, Iwasf edup.Thet orturewasn' tworthi tanymor e.
Me:Whydon' tyouj ustki l
lme?Whatar eyoust il
lwai ti
ngf or ?Killme! !
Him:Isai dl ookatt hi sboyi nf rontofyou!( hesai dpunchi ngme)Doyout hinkIwanthi s
father'sbl oodonmyhands?No!( hepunchedmeagai n)
Ichuckl edoutofdi sbel i
efandshookmyhead.
Me:Idon' thaveason.
Him:Yousonofabi tch!
Hepunchedmyst omachacoupl eoft imest i
llIwasont hef l
oor ,hekickedmeonmyr ibsso
hardt hatIf elttear sescapi ngmyeyesasIscr eamed.Heki ckedmeagai nandagai n, onever y
partofmybodyt i
llIhear daf emal evoi ceyel ling,"stop! !Noti nfrontoft hechi ld".Foramoment
thereIt houghthewasn' tgoi ngt ost opbuthest oppedandpul ledmeup, satmebackont he
chairandsl appedmet wi ce.Icoughedandhel dmychest ,thepai nwasi mmer se.
Him:Youaskedmybabygi r
ltoper formt woabor ti
ons, thisi syoursecondabor ti
on!I ttalks,
eatsandi tfuckenbr eat hes!I tsal i
ve!I sn'tthatj ustamazi ng? !
Iopenedmymout ht osaysomet hingbutmyvoi cewasst ucki nmyt hroat,theonl yt hingIcoul d
dowasmoanandgr oan.It r
iedt ost retchoutmyar m soIcoul df eeliftheboywasr eal lythere
orhewasj ustpl ayingwi t
hmymi nd.Icoul dn' tseecl ear lyanymor ebecauseoft hebl oodandI
thi
nkImyeyeswer eswol lenther eonl yt hingIdependedonwer emyhandsbutheyankedof f
myar m.
Him:Boyst eachhi m al essonhewi l
lneverf orget .
Theyt hr ewmeont hef loorandbashedmewi tht heobj ect st heyhad.
.
.
Phumza:
Iwascooki ngupast or m andsi ngi ngt ot hemusi ct hatwaspl ayi ngont hebackgr oundwhenI
heardmyphoner ingi ng.Icheckedt hecal lerI D, Ididn' tknowt henumbersoIi gnor edi tand
continuedsi ngi ng.I tst oppedr ingi ngbutr angagai n,hayi sukaIi gnor edi t.Wheni trangf orthe
thi
rdt imeIt houghtmaybei twasi mpor t
antsoIpi ckedupandt urnedt hevol umedown.
Me:Hel lo
Call
er :Goodaf ternoonma' am, am Ispeaki ngt ooneMr sDl ami ni?
Itwasaf emal evoi ce.
Me:Mr sDl a....ohyes, yesyouar e.Whoi saski ng?
Her:Iam cal lingt oi nf or m yout hatyourhusbandi si nhospi tal.
Whoawhat ?Tear st rickl eddownmycheeks, Iwast hinkingt hewor st.
Her:Ma' am ar eyoust il
lt here?Ma' am? !
Isnappedoutofi t.
Me:Why?Whathappenedt ohim?I sheokay?
Her:Wedon' thavet hef ul ldetailsast owhathappenedt ohi m, thedoct orsar est illexami ning
him.Iwoul dl ikeyout oqui cklycomedownt othehospi tal...
Me:Whi chhospi tal?!Phi ? !
Shegavemet hedet ailsoft hehospi t
al,Ilistenedt ot hem car eful l
yt hendr oppedt hecal l.
Undenzant oni Yandi sa? !HowwasIgoi ngt of indahospi talapha?Iswi t
chedof ft hest ovesand
rantoourbedr oom, Ilookedf orapaperandpenandqui ckl yj otteddownt hehospi taldet ail
s
beforeIf orgott hem.Thenaf terIcal ledhi smot her ,shepi ckedupaf ter5r ings.
Her:Makot i
Iwipedmyt ear sandcl ear edmyt hr oat.
Me:MamanguYandi sah- ehe. .
.
Myvoi cewasshaki ngandIcoul dn'tevenut teroutawor daf t
ert hat .
Her:Ar eyouokay?What 'sgoi ngon?Ar eyoui npai n?UphiuYandi sa?
Me:No. ..
Her:Babyt al kt ome, what 'sgoi ngon?
Itookadeepbr eathandt ol dheraboutt hecal l.
Her:Don' tpani cbabyIam sur eit snot hing, dri
nkagl assofwat erwi thsugari twi l
lhel pyout o
rel
ax.I '
llbet her et opi ckyouupandwewi l
lgot ot hehospi tal.
Inoddedanddr oppedt hecal l
.
Me:OkayPhumzacomedown, Yandi sai sokay, hei sokay.Whati fhei sn't?I'
mt ooyoungt obe
awi dowerLor dpl ease, please. ..
Iwentt ot heki tchen, tookoutagl assf r
om t hecupboar d.I tdr oppedr ightinf rontofmyf eet,
I
tookoutanot heroneandt hesamet hinghappened.Myhandswer eshaki ngandsweat ing.
Me:Hayif ut sek!
Ibangedt hecupboar dandwentt of reshenupandchangei ntosomet hingel se.Af t
erahouror
sohi smot hercal l
edt ot ellmet hatt heywer edownst airs, It ookmyphoneandl ockedt hedoor
thenwentdownst ai rs.
.
Whenwegott ot hehospi talwel ookedf oraf reepar kingspacet hengotof f.Hismot herandI
raninsi del eavi nghi sf atherbehi nd, wet ot her ecept iondeskt oask.Shet oldust hatt he
doctor swer est il
lbusywi thhi m sowehadt owai t.
Me:Thatwasahourago!Kant iwhatar etheydoi ngt ohi m? !Iwantt oseehi m!
Recept ionist:Litt
legi rlIwi llhavet oaskyout ocal m down, sitdownandwai tf orthedoct orto
comeoutoft heemer gencyr oom.
Me:Idon' twantt osi tdown, Iwantt oseemyhusband!
Shel ookedatmeanddownatmyhands.
Recept ionist:Thedoct orsar est i
llbusywi thhim ma' am pl easesi tdownandwai t.
Mama:Atl eastt ellushowhei s,whathappenedt ohi m?Whobr oughthi mi n?Howwashe?
Recept ionist:Iam af raidIdon' thaveanyusef ulinformat ionf oryou, myshi f tjuststartedright
now.Al lwehavear ethese.
Shegaveushi sphone, li
censeandcarkeys.Hi sdadt ookt hem andt hankedher .
Mama:OhmyGodyouar eusel ess!
Tata: Nkosi kazi,hayi .Comesi tdownandwai t.
Icouldn' tunder standhowhecoul dbesocal m whenhi ssonhasbeeni nt heemer gencyr oom
formor ethanahourandnoonewast ell
ingusanyt hingabouthi scondi t
ion.Hepul ledust othe
chairs,wesatdownandl ookedatt heemer gencyr oom door .
Recep:Iam sor ryt odi sturbyouma' am butIwoul dlikeyout of i
llinthesef or msf orme.( she
gavemeaf orm andpen)Andt hismanmi ghthavesomeusef uli nformationf oryou.
Wel ookedathi ml ikehungr yhyenas, lookingatsomet hingt heycoul df eedon.
Tata: Unjanjndoda?
Man:Iam goodt at a.Mynamei sMongezi ,Iwor kasasecur ityguar dhereatt hehospi tal
.About
2to3hour sagoasIwasopeni ngt hegat ef orcar sIf oundamanl ayingout sidet hegat e,he
wasbadl ybeat enupandcover edi nblood.It riedtowakehi m upbuthewasn' tmovi ng, I
thoughthewasdi edbuthewasst il
lwar m soIcar riedhi mi nsi desot hatdoct or scouldat t
end
tohim.Hehasbeeni nt heemer gencyr oom si ncet henandwedon' tknowanyt hingelse.
Icouldn' tholdmyt ear s,theyj ustgushedoutofmyeyes.Whowoul ddot hist ohi m andwhy?I f
theywant edmoneycoul dn'ttheyj usttakei tandgowi thouthur t
inghi m?
Tata: Makot ihayi ,r ememberyouar ecar ryingababyi nyou.Al loft hisstressi snotgoodf or
yourbodyandt hebaby.Pl easesi sicalm down, Yandi sawi llbeokay.Iknowmysoni sst r
ong,
hewi llbeokay.
Mama:Hayiunyanawam kuphel akwakhebawo!( notmyonl yson)
Tata: Nkosi kaziyouhavet obest rongnow, best r
ongf orthischi ld.Sheneedsyou.
Recep:I t
sokayyoucansi gnt hef ormsl ater.
Tata: Noi tsfine,I'llsignt hem.Thankyouyoungman, wenzel ukhul uf orthisf ami ly.
Mongezi :It
smyj obsi r,Ijusthopehepul l
st hrough.
Tata: Thankyou.

24
Phumza:
20mi nutesl ater...
Adoct orandnur sewal kedoutoft hepassagetal
king.Wegotupandmett hem half
way.
Me:Howi she?
Mama:Howi smyson?
Thedoct orlookedatus.
Dr:Whoi syoursonma' am?
Me:Yandi saDl ami ni
,theyoungmanwho. .
.
Dr:Ohyes, wej ustgotoutoft heatre.
Tata:Thet heat re?Whydi dheneedat heat
re?
Hegavet henur sestri
cti nstructi
onsandaf il
ethenturnedtous.
Dr:Iam DrDavi sand...
Me:Justt ellushowhei s!
Dr:Fornowi tscr it
ical
.
Mama:Whatdoyoumeanbyt hat?
Dr:Hesuf feredi nternalbl eedingandt wobrokenri
bs,wehadt ooperat
eimmediatel
ybefor
ethe
brokenribsandi nter
nal bleedingcausedanydamaget ohisorgans.I
tsbad,
heendur edal
otof
painbutwemanagedt ost abil
izehim.
TearsescapedmyeyesandIwi pedt hem.
Tata: That '
sgr eatnewsr ight ?Hewi llbeokay?Thesur gerywassuccessf ul?
Dr:Thosear ethegoodnews, thesur ger ywassuccessf ul.Wemanagedt ostopt hebl eedi ng
andt oat tacht ohi sr i
bsbackt oget her .
Tata: Sohei sgoi ngt obeokay?
Dr:Yessi rbuthei sinI CU, i
tsj ustt empor aryt il
lhi sheal thandst rengt himpr oves.
Me:I sheokay?
Dr:Yeshei sbuthewi llbeouti nt henext10mi nut es,wehadt osedat ehim sohecangetsome
sleep.
Me:Butwecanseehi m bef or ehepassesoutr ight ?
Dr:Whoamongstyoui sPhumza?That '
st henamehehasbeencal lingsi ncewest abili
zedhi m.
Tatapoi nt edt ome.
Tata: Hiswi fe.
Henodded.
Dr:OkayIcanmakeanexcept ionf orher , andonl yherbecauseIt hinkhewoul dr eallylovet o
seeherbef or ehepassesout .
Mama:ButIam hi smot herwhydoeshewanthert her ewi thhi m andnotme?
Dr:Idon' tknowma' am buti tsqui tecl eart hathewant st oseehi swi fe.
Tata: Nkosi kazi ..
.
Hehel dherhandandshenodded.
Me:Thankyou.
Dr:ComeI 'l
l takeyout ohi m.
Mama:Tel lhi mt hatIam her epl ease.
Inoddedandf ollowedaf tert hedoct ortowher ehewas.Heopenedt hedoorf orme, Iwal kedin
fi
rstandst oodbyt hedoor .Il ookedupi nanai mt ost opt het earsfrom f all
ingbutt heyj ustsl i
de
downonei thersi deofmyf acet ot heear s.
"Ma'am ar eyouokay? ",Iwi pedmyf aceandt urnedt othedoct or.
Me:I shegoi ngt obeokay?
Dr:Youneedt ohavef aith.( Inodded)Pl easedomeaf avor .
Me:Anyt hing.
Dr:Noupset ti
ngnewspl ease.
Inodded.
Me:Soi sheawake?
Dr:Hewontbeawakef orl ongt houghbecauseoft hemedi cat i
onwegavet ohi m.
Inodded.
Dr:Iwi llleaveyout wot oget her , 10mi nutes.
Hebr ushedmyshoul dert henwal kedout .Iwal kedovert ohi sbedandst oodbyhi sf eet.I
couldn' tdot his,Icoul dn'tseehi ml iket his.Itur nedmybackagai nsthi m andwal kedt ot hedoor .
"Takeadeepbr eathPhumza, youcandot his.Icandot his, Ineedt odot his".Iwi pedmyt ears
andt urnedt of acehi mt henwal kedovert ohim sl owly.
Me:Qhawe. ..
Igent l
ycar essedhi sf acet henki ssedhi seyesandwi pedhi syear sast heyescapedhi scl osed
eyed.Hehadmi norcut sandbr ui sesonhi sf ace, theywer en'tbadt houghbutt heswel li
ngwas
bad.Fori nst ancehi seyes, theywer er eallyswol len.Whoeverdi dt histohi m di dn'tdeser vet o
becal ledahumanbei ng.
Me:Babei tsme, Phumzayourwi fe.( hesl owl yopenedhi seyesandt earsescapedhi seyes)
Hey...don' tdot hispl ease.( Iwi pedhi stear s)Canyout alk?( helift
edhi shandandpul ledt he
oxygenmaskbutIst oppedhi m)I tsokayyouar ei nhospi tal,youar esaf enow.( Itookhi shand
andr ubbedi t)Youar ewi thmenow.( Ikissedhi shand)Thedoct orssai dyou' l
lbeokay, thi si
s
j
ustt empor ary.(hewi pedmyt ear st hent ouchedmyhai r)I t'
sbeaut if
ulr i
ght?( henodded, I
smi l
ed)Thankyou.Yourpar ent sar eout side, woul dyoul iket oseet hem?( heshookhi shead
andInodded)Iwontcal lthem i ni fyoudon' twantt oseet hem.
Henoddedandsqueezedmyhand.Isatdownont hebedandspoket ohimt il
l hepassedout .
Hewasn' tr espondi ngt oanyt hi ngIwassayi ngt hough, hej ustshookornoddedhi sheadorj ust
l
ookedatmebl anklybutIunder st oodbecausehewasi npai nandt hel astthingIwant edwas
forhist ousehi sst rengt hont alking.Igotupandt uckedhi mi nkahl ethenki ssedhi sf orehead.
Me:Il oveyou.
Ikissedhi m agai nt henwal kedout .
.
Mama:Howi she?
Me:Idon' tknowr eal l
y.
Shepushedmeagai nstt hewal l
.
Mama:Iaskedyouhowmysoni sandyoucheeki ngme?
Tata: Whoamamakhe. ..
Sher emovedherhandsf rom me.
Mama:Tel lmehowi smyson? !
Me:Idon' tknowmama, hei sbr ui sedandswol len, andazihei sn'ttal
king.Hei sonlyr esponding
throughnoddi ngandshaki nghi shand.
Mama:Youhavet of indt heper sonr esponsi bl efort hist at akhepl ease,findt hemanbehi ndmy
son' sat t
ack.
Tata: Iwi llmyl ovet rustme, Iwi l
l andIwi llmakesur ehei spr oper l
ydeal twith.
Mama:Youwi ll?
Tata: Iwi llst handwasam butIwi l
lhavet ot akeyouhomenowsoyoucangetsomer estand
thenIwi llheadst rai ghtt ot hepol i
cest ation.
Me:Iwontgetanysl eepknowi ngt hathei slyingi nt her e, Iam goi ngwi thyou.
Tata: Makot iandi zuphi kisananawe, Iwi l
ltakeyouhome.Yi zani.
MamaandIl ookedateachot herandshr ugged.
Her :Let sgobaby.
Me:Pl easedr opmeof fatt heapar tmentatl easti tiscl osert ot hehospi t
al,Icanj ustt akeataxi
wheneverIwantt oseehi m.
Her :Ar eyousur eyouwantt obeal one?
Inodded.
Her :Ifyouneedanyt hingyouwi llcal lright?
Inoddedandgotont hecar ,
mamat oldt atat odr opmeof fatt heapar tmentandt hat'swhere
theydr oppedmeof f.Icr ossedt her oad, openedt hegat eandwenti nthenIwentupt oour
apar tment .WhenIgott her eIunl ockedandwal kedi n, locki ngt hedoorbehi ndme.Iwent
straightt ot hebat hr oom andr anmysel fabat h,Iundr essedt hengoti nthebat ht
ub.Isatback
andt ookadeepbr eat ht hencl osedmyeyesandl ett het ear sout .
.
IguessIf ellasl eepi nt het ubbecausendet hukewhenIhear dmyphoner i
ngi ng.Igotupand
gotoutoft hebat ht ubsi ncet hewat erwascol d.Iwr appedat owelar oundmybodyt henpicked
up, i
twasYandi sa' smot her .
Me:Mama?
Her :HeybabyIam sor ryf ordi stur bingyoursl eep.
Me:Notatal lmamaIwashavi ngabat h.
Her :Att hist imeoft heni ght ?
Me:It hinkIpassedoutwhi l
eIwasst i
llint het ub.
Her :Forhowl ong?
Me:Idon' tknowmama.
Her :Youhavet ot akecar eofyour sel fbaby, youcan' taf for dtol oset hebaby.
Me:Iknowmama, itwasj ustami stake.
Her :Iknow.Iwant edt oapol ogi sef orwhathappenedatt hehospi tal
.
Me:I tsokaymama, Idi dn' tmeant ocheekyou.
Her :Ithinkwewer eal lfrust rated, for givemepl easeIshoul dn' thavet akent hem outonyou.
Me:Ohmamat her ei snoneedf oryout oapol ogize, itsokay.
Her :Thankyoumt anam.Iwant edt ot ellyout hatt heyf oundhi scar .
Me:Phi ?
Her :Itwaspar kedr ightacr osst hehospi tal,lookedl i
kehewasdr oveni ni t
.
Me:Sowhoeverdi dt hi st ohi mt ookhi mt ohospi tal?
Her :That 'st heirt heor yr ightnow.
Me:Butwhy?Doeshehaveanyenemi es?
Her :Idon' tknowbuthecan' thaveenemi es.Hei saf riendl yyoungman, hecoul dn'
thave
formedenemi es.
Me:Iguesswehavet obet hankf ulthathedi dn' tleavehi mt odie, thathet ookhimt oapl ace
wher ehecoul dgethel p.
Her :Iguessbuthenear lyki ll
edmyson.
Me:Dot heyhaveanyi deawhocoul dhaveat tackedhi m?
Her :Att hemomentt her ei snot hingbutIwi llcal ltoletyouknowi ftheyf i
ndanymor e
i
nf ormat ion.
Me:Thankyouf orl ettingmeknow.
Her :Youdeser vet oknowwhat 'sgoi ngon.Pl easegetsomesl eep, rest.Youhavet obest rong
foryourhusband.
Me:Ewema.
Her :Okaykebabe, I
'l
lseeyout omor row.
Me:Ewema.
Idr oppedt hecal landwashedt hebat ht ub, af tert hatIgotundert heshowerandhadaqui ck
shower .Thenaf terIwentt obed.
.
WhenIwokeupt het imewas6h00, Isatupandr ubbedmyeyes.Theyf el
theavykl kIcri
ed
almostt hewhol eofl astni ght ,Ist il
lcoul dn'tbel i
evet hatYandi sawasi nhospitalfi
ghtingf orhis
l
ife.Igotoutofbedandqui cklymadet hebed, Iwant edt ogocheckonYandi sa.Af t
ermaki ng
thebedIwentt ohaveashowert hengotdr essed, Icombedmyweaveandt i
editthenwentt o
theki t
chen.Ther ewer ebr okengl assesf rom l astni ghtont hef l
oor ,Iwentt ogetabr oom butI
wasdi sturbedbyaknockont hedoor .
Me:Whoi sit ?
"Mandl aandLubanzi ",Idr oppedt hebr oom andwentt oopenf ort hem.
Mandl a:Hey, howar eyouhol dingup?
Igotoutoft hewaysot heywal kedi nandcl osedt hedoorbehi ndt hem.
Me:Iam t rying, shoul dIof f eryouanyt hi ng?
Theydi dn'tr espondt ot hatbutwentt ot hewi ndowt hent hebal conyast hought heywer e
l
ooki ngf orsomet hing.
Me:Ar eyouguysl ooki ngf orsomet hing?
Theywal kedbacki n.
Luba:Whyi st her egl assont hef loor ?Di dyout ryt ohur tyourself?Di dsomeonet rytohur tyou?
Hesoundedpar anoi d.
Me:OhmyGodcal m down, iwilephezol o.
Mandl a:Why?
Me:Yi nt oningemi buzo?
Mandl a:Justanswert hequest ion.
Me:Whati si tt oyou?
Mandl a:Ever ything.
Me:Hai bo.
Mandl a:Idi dn' tknowyout obest ubbor n.
Me:Becauseyoudon' tknowmeatal l.
Luba:OhmyGod!
Mandl a:Si tdownwewi llclean, haveyoueat enanyt hing?
Ilookedatt hem l i
keWTF?Whatwasi ttot hem?
Me:Whyar eyouher e?
Mandl a:Tocheckonyou.
Me:Iam okayasyoucansee, youcangonow.
Luba:Wewentt oseeYandi sal astni ghtwhenwehear daboutt heat t
ack.
Me:Okay.
Mandl a:Andheaskedust ocomel ookaf teryou.
Me:Why?Idon' tneedl ooki ngaf ter.Hei stheonet hatneedst obel ookedaf t
erhayimna.
Luba:That 'snotwhathet hi nks, whati fhi sat tacker scomeaf teryou?
Me:Whywoul dt hey?
Mandl a:It hi nkyouhavesai denoughLuba, sohaveyoueat en?
Me:Hayibut ...
Mandl a:Youneedt oeatot her wiset hel itt
leonewontbest rong.
Haibo!Isatdownast heymadet hemsel vesbusy, Lubasweptt hef loorwhil
eMandl amademe
somet hingtoeat .
Mandl a:Whatdon' tyoueat ?
Me:Eggsandbacon.
Mandl a:Butt hosear et heheal thiestfoods.
Me:Andanyt hi
ngwi thchi cken.
Mandl a:Hayi sukai st hatreal lypr egnancynobakukusa?
Ismiled.
Me:Hor mones.
Mandl a:Juiceorcof f ee?
Me:Cof fee.
Mandl a:Noj uice,caf feinei snotgoodf orthebaby.
Me:Huh?
Mandl a:Wedi dourr esear chandIdon' tt hinkwewi l
l haveanypr obl em looki
ngafteryou.
Me:Andwor k?
Mandl a:Iwi l
lgot ot heof f
icewhi l
eLubanzir emai nsbehi ndt olookaf t
eryou.
Me:Idon' tneedababysi tter.
Hewal kedovert omeandgavememyf oodandagl assofj uice.
Mandl a:Ithinkyoudo, youbr eakinggl assesandl eavi ngt hem ont hef l
oor.
Me:Iwasaboutt osweepnj e.
Mandl a:Notonl ythat ,youal soeat i
ngt hi ngsyoushoul dn'tbeeat ingi nyourcondi
tion.
Me:Condi tion?Iam notsi ck.
Them:Weknowt hat .
Mandl a:Eatnow, I
'llseeyouaf terwor k.Lubanziawor dwi thyouecal ani.
Il
ookedatt hem ast heywal kedoutt ot hebal cony,closi ngt hedoorbehi ndthem.Ilookeddown
atmypl ateandst ar tedeat ing.Af tersomet imet heywal kedbacki n.
Mandl a:Lubanzi wi lltakeyouwher everyouwantt ogo.
Me:O. K.A.Y?
Mandl a:Don' tworryi t sjustt empor ary, wedoi ngaf avourf oraf r
iend.
Inodded.
Mandl a:Shar p.
Luba:Shar p.
Mandl awal kedout , Lubanzi satdownandl ookedatme.Okay?

25
Phumza:
Iwasfeelingal i
lawkwar dar oundLubanzibecausehewasj uststar
ingatmesoIgotupand
wenttofinishoffmyf oodi ntheki tchen.Isatont hekit
chenhi ghchairandconti
nuedeat
ingmy
food.
Luba:Areyougoi ngtoseehi mt oday?
Me:Yeah.
Him:When?
Me:Now, why?Doyouwantt ogosomewher e?
Him:NahIj ustwant edt oknowyourpl ansf ortheday.
Me:Idon'tdomuchdur ingt hedaysoi tsjustthehospitalt
henhome.
Him:Okayt hat'
scool t
hen.
Me:Butyoudon' thavet olookaf t
erme, Icant akecareofmysel f.
Him:Hu-huhnanai tsnotupf ordi scussi onyourhusbandwant sustol ookaf
teryouandt
hat'
s
whatwegoi ngtodo.
Me:Isthi
sper sonal ?Hisat tack,isitper sonal?
Him:Whywoul di tbeper sonal ?
Me:Thewayyouguysar egoi ngon, doyouknowwhoat t
ackedhim?
Him:Nowest il
lwai t
ingf orhimt ot elluswhoat t
ackedhim.
Me:Soawazi ?
Him:Notatal l.
Igotup, putmypl atei nt hesi nkt henwentt ot hebat hroom t orinsemymout h.WhenIgotout
Lubanziwasst andi ngbyt hedoor .
Me:Youwantt ouset hebat hroom?
Heshookhi sheadt hengotoutofmyway.
Me:Thenwhywer eyoust andi ngt her e?Wer eyoupeaki ngonme?
Him:NoIam noper ver t.
Me:Ihopeso.
Him:Iam her etol ookaf teryounotcheckyouout ,comeon.
Me:Thenst ayint hel ounge.
Him:Ij ustwantt omakesur et hatyousaf e.
Me:Hai boye- bhut ist ayi nt hel ounge.
Him:Iwast oldnott ol etyououtofmysi ght .
Me:Ngokuyouwi l
laccompanymet ot hebat hr oom?You' l
lwat chmesl eep?
Him:Hayi suka!
Me:Hayisukawena!
Iwentt othebedr oom f ormybagandphone.
Me:Let sgot hen.
Him:Af t
eryou.
Irolledmyeyesandl eadt hewayt ot hef ront.Heswi tchedof fthet vthenopenedt hedoorf or
me, Igotoutf ir
standhef ol l
owed.Il ockedt henwewentdownst airst ohiscar ,wegotonand
hedr oveust ot hehospi tal.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Iwassl owl ydr ifti
ngawayt osl eepwhenIhear dt hedoorswi ngopen, someonewal kedi nt hen
cl
osedt hedoor .Iwant edt oopenmyeyesbutt heywer eheavy, what evert heywer egi vingme
wasr eal l
ygood.I tputmet osl eepi nj ust10mi nutes.WhenIf eltcoldl i
psagai nstmyf orehead
Iknewi twasmywi fesoIhadt of i
ghtagai nstdr owsi ness, Ibarredmypar ent sfrom seei ngme.
Ididn' twantt oseet hem becauseIknewt heywer egoi ngt ost ressmeout ,askaboutt he
beat i
ng.Shesatont hebedandt ookmyhand.
Her:Mol ost handwasam.
Ismi ledandopenedmyeyes, shel ookedsobeaut iful.Hereyes, ever ythingabouther .
Her:It houghtyouwer esl eepi ng.
Ishookmyheadandpoi ntedt oaboar dandpen.That '
st heonl ywayIcoul dr espondt oher ,
wr i
ti
ngdown.I twasf rust ratingbutmychestpai nedever yti
meIt ri
edt osaysomet hing.
Her:Whataboutt hem?
Ipoint edt ot hem t hent ome.
Her:Uyazi funa?
Inoddedandhi tmyhead, finallyshegoti t.Shesmi l
edandt ookt hem t hengavet hem t ome.I
scribbl edsomet hingdownt hengavei ttoher .
Me:Lubanzi ?
Her:Hei swai ti
ngout side, di dyour eal lyaskt hem t ol ookaf t
erme?( Inodded)Idon' tneedi t,
Lubanzif ollowsmeever ywher eevent ot hebat hroom.( Ichuckl edt henmoanedoutofpai n)
Sorrymyl ove.( Inodded)
Me:Youdo, don' tf i
ghtt hem.
Her:Idon' t,thepol i
cear ewor kingonf indingwhoeverdi dt hist oyou.
Me:Nopol i
ce.
Her:Why?Don' tyouwantt hepeopl ewhodi dt hist oyout obef ound?
Me:Pol i
ce, usel ess.
Iwr otei nkeywor dsbecausei twasdamnf rustrating.
Her:Not heynot ,theyf oundyourcarl astni ght.Theywi llfi
ndt hesepeopl einnot i
me.
Ididn' twantt hepol icei nvol vedi nt hisi twoul dr eall
yupsetJer ome, hemi ghtevendr agmet o
j
ailwi thhi m.Iwasgoi ngt odeal wi thJer omet hebestwayhet aughtmehow.Ial readyhada
planandmyboyswer eal readyr unni ngi tf orme.
Me:Nopol i
cePhumza!
Shenoddedandl ookedatt hedoorasi tswungopen.DrDavi swal kedi ncar ryingaf il
e.Shegot
upandst oodbyt hebed.
Dr:Don' twor r
yyoucansi tdown.
Shenoddedandsatbackdownont hebed.
DrDavi s:Goodmor ning, howi smypat ienttoday?
Ihatedt hatt erm butIputmyt humbupanyway.Hedi dwhat everhecamei ntodot henl ooked
atus.
Dr:That '
sgood.Yourheal thi sr eal lyimpr ovi
ng, i
tsal mostl i
keyouwantt ogohomeassoonas
possibl e.
Ihadt hingst odooutt her esobei ngcomf ortableher ewasn' tanopt ion,Iwant edtohealf astso
Icouldgetoutofher e.
Me:Ido.
Dr:Itsgoodt oseet hatyouput tingt hem t ouse.Mr sDl amini, howar eyouhol dingup?
Her:It houghtIwasgoi ngt ol osehi ml astnightbutt odayIcanseet hathei sgoi ngt obeokay
soIam f eel i
ngsomuchbet ter .
Shamei sithandwasam.
Dr:Hei s, Iwi l
lbemovi nghi m outoft heI CUt omor r
owi fhisheal thisimpr ovi
ngi nthisr ate.
Her:That 'sgr eat .Sodoct ori st hishowhei sgoi ngt otalk?
Dr:Justunt i
lhecant alkwi thoutcompl ainingaboutpai n.Itsbestt hatheuseshi sstrengt ht o
healr athert hant al k.
Her:Doyouhaveanyi deawhent hatwi l
lbe?
Dr:Onl yt imewi l
lt ell.
Shenoddedandl ookedatme, Itookherhand.Idi dn'twanthert owor ryorevenf eel sorryf or
me, Iwasgoi ngt obeokay.
Dr:Buthei sgoi ngt obef ine, hei sr eal l
yheal ingwel landf ast .Inmy20year sofexper ienceI
haveneverseenapat i
enti mpr ovesof ast,Iam impr essed.
Wel ookedateachot herandsmi l
ed.
Dr:Iwi l
lleavet het woofyout otal kbutpl easemakesur et
hatheget srest.
Her:Iwi l
lt hankyou.
Dr:Not hankyouf ormaki ngmyj obeasy.
Her:Nopr oblem.
Hesmi l
edt henwal kedout .
Her:Youonyourbestbehavi our .
Me:Ihopet ober ewar ded.
Ibrushedhert high, shegi ggl edandhi tmyhand.
Her:Whenyougetoutofher e,yesyouwi l
l.
Me:Hu- huhnow.
Her:Hah!
Iremovedt heoxygenmaskandpul ledhert owar dsme, shegi ggledandl eanedi nforaki ss.We
sharedaki ssbutbr okei ti mmedi at elybecauseshewasbal anci ngwi t
hmybodyandever yinch
ofithur t, theyr eal l
ygotme.ButIwasgoi ngt ogetbackateachandever yoneoft hem.
Her:Iam sor r
y.
Ishookmyheadandmi med" Iloveyou" .Shesmi ledandmi medi tback.
Her:Babe. ..Doyouknowwhodi dt hi st oyouandwhy?
Me:Can' tr emember .
Her:It'sokaymyl ove, itwi l
l comebackt oyou.
Inodded, sher ubbedmyhandandki ssedi t.
Her:Doyouwantmet osi ngf oryou?Mom al wayssaysmysi ngi ngmakesherf eelbet t
er .
Me:You' llputmet osl eep.
Her:That 'st hepl an, youhavet or est .
Me:Sor ryf orscar ingyou.
Her:Don' tbesor ry, i
twasn' tyourf ault.
Me:I twas.
Her:Theonl ythingt hat'sscar i
ngmei syounotwant i
ngpol icei nvolved.
Me:Si ngf orme.
Ididn'twantt ot alkaboutt hatagai n, Ididn'twantpol i
ceont hismat t
erf i
nishandkl aar.It hink
shegoti tbecauseshedi dn' tcont est ,shej uststartedsi ngi
ng.Hervoi cewassmoot h,sof tand
beautiful.Shesangbeaut i
fully,Iwasact uall
yamazed.
.
.
Phumza:
Iguessmysi ngi ngputhi mt osl eep.Igotupt uckedhi mi nthenwr otehim amessageonhi s
board;" Youl ookedsopeacef ul,Icoul dn'twakeyouup.I 'l
lseeyout omorrow.LovePhumi "
.Iput
i
tonhi schestt henwal kedout ,
Lubanzigotupf rom hischai rwhenhesawme.
Him:Howi she?
Me:Hewi llbeokay, ulelengoku.
Him:That '
sgr eat ,I'
llseehi ml ater.
Me:Okay.
Him:Wegoi nghome?
Me:Yeah.
Him:Yousur eyouwontneedanyt hi ng?
Me:Yeah.
Him:Okaycanwest artatDebonai rs?Iwantt ogetpi zza.
Me:Nopr obl em.
Him:Yi zake.
Heopenedt hedoorf orme, Igoti nandcl osed.Hewentt ohissideandgotont henstar t
edt he
engineanddr oveout .
.
Whenwegothomehepar kedandwegotof f,het ookthepi zzaboxesf r
om thebackseatand
foll
owedaf t
ermeaski ngmenott ol eavehi m.Iwai tedforhi m onlywhenIgott othelift.
Him:I fyoul eavemewhoi sgoi ngt opr otectyou?
Me:Fr om what ?
Him:. .
.
Me:Hayisukauzot hul angoku?
Stil
lhesai dnot hing, awuokayt henIwasn' tgoi ngtobeghi mt otalktome.Wegotof fwhenwe
gottoourf l
oorandwal kedt omyapar tment ,Iunl ockedandwal kedi n.Hewenttoputt heboxes
downt hendi dt hewhol echecki ngt hing, goingt oever yroom.Hef inall
ycomebackt ot he
l
oungeandsatdown.
Me:Youwantmet odi shupf oryou?
Him:Pl ease. ..
Itookoutt wopl atesanddi shedupf ort hebot hofus, Itookoutt wogl assesandpour edjuice.
Thenwentt oser vehi m.
Him:CanIhaveabeeri nst eadoft hat ?
Me:Howar eyougoi ngt opr otectmei fyoudr unk?
Him:Okayj uicei tist hen.
Het ookt hepl ateandgl ass.
Me:Youdi dn' thavemuchofachoi ce.
Iwentt ogetmi ne.
Him:Ial wayst houghtyouwer equi et .
Me:Cl ear l
y.
Isatdownandt ookabi teonmypi zza.
Him:Hmm. .
...
.
Hour slater .
..
Iwasi nt heki tchencooki ngandeat ingacakewhenaknockcamet hroughthedoor.Lubanzi
gotupandwentt ogeti t,Mandl awal kedi nfollowedbyt woguys.Theywer ecarr
yingabed.
Me:Hai boyoumovi ngi n?
Mandl a:Isn' titobvi ous?Theempt yr oom boys.
Theywentt her e, Mandl acamet ost andnextt omei ntheki t
chen.
Me:Yandi sadi dn' tsayanyt hingaboutyoumovi ngin.
Mandl a:Cl ear lybuti fwegoi ngt ol ookaf teryou( hetookaf orkandat emycake)nice...24/7we
havet omovei n.
Ijustlookedathi m andt houghti yaphaphal eway.
Lubanzi:I'l
lbeof f
, I
'l
lseeyout omor row.
Mandl a:Don' twor ry,I'l
llookaf terher .
Luba:But ..
.
Mandl a:Don' twor ryIsai d.
Me:Whataboutwor k?
Mandl a:Igott wodaysof f.Masi thet heecal aniLubanzi .CanIt aket hiswi thme?
Hepoi ntedt ot hecake.
Me:Youal readydoi ngasyoupl easenj e.
Heshr uggedandt ooki t,ohwel l.Icutmysel fanothersl i
ceandwat chedhi s"boys"comei nand
outofmyapar tmentwi thbagsandever ything.Thi sguywasr eallymovi nginandher eIwas
thi
nkingt hiswasj ustt empor ary.Bendi zothi nikumamakaYandi sai fshecameher e?His
fat
her?HowwasIgoi ngt oexpl ai nlivingwi thanotherguy?Speakoft hedevi l,
myphoner ang.
Hismom wascal li
ng.
Me:Ma?
Her:What 'swr ongwi thyourhusband?Di dhebumphi sheadandf orgett hatIam hismot her?
ThatIcar ri
edhi mf or9mont hs?ThatIspent15hour sinlabor ?
Shesoundedupset .
Me:Whatdi dhedo?
Her:Wewentt oseehi m si not atakhebutwewer en'tall
owedt oseehi m, yintoenjanieyo?He
doesn'twantt oseeus!Wehi spar ent s!
Me:Hayimamahedi dn' tfor get...
Her:Qha?
Me:Hedoesn' twantyout owor rymama.
Her:Iam al readywor ri
ed, Ican' tseemyson!Andazi ukubaunj ani!
Me:Hei scomi ngoutofI CUt omor row, I'
lltalkt ohim.
Her:Howi she?
Me:St il
lswol len. .
.It oldherever yt hing.
Her:Whocoul dhavedonet hist omyson?
Me:Youst il
lhaven' tf oundanyl eads?
Her:Notatal l,onl yhi sf i
ngerpr intsar eint hecar .Ther eisnot hing, evenonhi sphone.Ther ei
s
nothi
ng.Thecaseweopened, thef i
leismi ssingandt hepolicehavecool edoffthecase.
Me:Thatcan' tbegood.
Her:Buthi sf atherwontr estt il
lwhoeverdi dt hi
siscaught .
Me:That 'sgood.Mama. ..
Her:Yes?
Me:HeaskedMandl at ocomel ivewi thmet il
lheisoutofhospi tal
.
Her:Soheal lowshi sf ri
endst oseehi m butmnamamakheIcan' t?!
Me:Ohyi nimamai tsnotl iket hat .
Her:Thenhowi si tbecausendi m owamzal ayo! ?
Me:Sor rymama.
Her:Hayisuka!
Shedr oppedt hecal lonme.Il ookedatt hephoneandt hrewi tont heki t
chencount er.
"Wear edonenowsi si, uMandl auphi ?"
"Ri
ghther e, t
hankyou.Lubanziwi llwal kyouout "
,hesai dwal kingi nf r
om t hebalcony.
Luba:Phumza?
Me:ByeLubanzi andt hankyouf ortoday.
Luba:Anyt ime.
Hewal kedout , Mandl awentt ol ockt hedoort hencamebackt ot heki tchen.
Mandl a:Needhel p?
Me:Iam al mostdone.
Him:Okaynopr obl em.
Hesatont heki tchencount erandwat chedmecook.

26
Phumza:
Icoul
dn'
tsl
eepbecauseIkeptonhear
ingnoi
sesi
nthef
ront
,Icheckedt
het
imeonmyphone.I
t
wasj ustaf t
er12, theymademepar anoi dwi t hal lt
hi s"pr ot ection".Igotoutofbedandwor ea
gownt henwentt ot helounge, Mandl awasi nt her ewat chi ngt vandeat i
ng.
Me:Whyar en'tyou. ..?
Hequi ckl ygr abbedsomet hingf rom t het ableandpoi ntedi tt ome, Ijustf r
oze.Ihavenever
seeni tinr eall ifebutIknewhowi tlooked, Ihaveseeni tinmovi essoIknewhowi tlooked.
Him:Whyar eyousneaki nguponme?Younear l
ygotyour sel fkil
ledman!
Hegotupandputi tont het able, droppi ngt hepl ateorbowlhewasusi ngont hef loorandwent
toswi tchont hel ight .Ilookedatt het able.
Me:Whydoyouhaveagun? !
Him:Whyar eyousneaki nguponme? !
Me:Whydoyouhaveagun? !
Him:Whyar eyousneaki nguponme? !
Itookof fmyshoeandt hrewi tathi m, heducked.
Me:Youar ei nmyl oungedamni t!
Him:So? !
Me:Justanswert hedamnquest ion!
Him:Sneakuponmel iket hatagai nandyouwi lldie!
Me:Iwi lldi e?!I nmyownl ounge?DoesYandi saknowyouhaveagun?
Him:He. .
.he. .
.youwer en'tsupposedt oseei t.Whatar eyoudoi ngupatt hi
stimeoft henight
anyway?
Me:OhmyGod!OhmyGod!Heknowsdoesn' the?
Him:I tsf orpr ot ection.
Me:Pr ot ect ionf rom what ?!Idon' tneedpr otect i
on!
Him:Youdo!
Me:I smyl ifei ndanger ? !
Him:Wi llyoust opshout i
ng?You' llwakeupt heot herr esi dent s.
Me:Tel lmet het ruth, what '
sgoi ngonMandl a?Whydoyouhaveagun?
Him:Topr otectyouPhumzaokay?Ther estyoucanaskyourhusband.
Hepi ckedupmyshoeandwal kedt owar dsme, hegavei ttome.
Me:Pl easet ellmet het ruth.
Him:Wearyourshoe.
Me:Wi llyout el lme?
Hel i
ftedmeupandwentt oputmeont opoft heki t
chencount er,heputonmyshoet henput
medown.
Him:AskYandi sa, hewi lltel
lyou.
Me:Buthecan' tt alk.
Him:Thenwai tunt ilhecant al
kokay?
Irai
sedmyl efteyebr ow.
Him:Noser i
ousl ywai tforYandi sa, Idon' tknowanyt hing.
Me:Getout .
Him:What ?
Me:I fyouwontt ellmet het rutht hengetout ,Idon' tneedyourpr otection.
Hechuckl edandshookhi shead.
Him:Doyouwantwat er?
Me:Idon' twantwat er,Iwantanswer s.I fmyl ifeisi ndangert henIwantt oknow.
Him:Hayi keandazi Phumza!Andazi !
Het ookt hebr oom andwentt osweept hebr okenpl ate, puti ti
nt hebi n.Thent ookhi sgunand
wentt ohi sr oom." Mci m" ,Iswi tchedof ft hel ightst henwentt omybedr oom.Igotont hebed
andt ookmyphone.Iwentt hroughmyphot osandst oppedonYandi sa'spicture,Ihavenever
beensooconf usedaboutknowi ngsomeonel ikeIwasconf usedaboutknowi ngYandi sa.
Me:What 'sgoi ngonYandi sa?Whoar eyou?
Igotoutofbedandt urnedont hel i
ghtt henwentt hroughhi spaper s, l
ookingf orsomet hi
ng,
anything.Acl ueast owhatwasgoi ngon, didheupsetsomeone?Doeshehaveenemi es?Ijust
want edt oknowi fmyhusbandwasr eallyt hemanIt houghthewas.ButIf oundnot hing,
everythi ngwasaboutwor k,wor k, wor kandmor ewor k.Iputever ythingi ntheirri
ghtfulplaces
andgotbacki nbed.
.
Itf eltlikeal ongni ght ,Iwasr est less.Icoul dn' tsleep, Ikeptont hinkingaboutYandi sa.Mandla
andt hegun, whywoul dIneedt hatt ypeofpr otection?Gunski l
l,gunsar edanger ous.Why
woul dIneeddanger ouspr otect ion?Maybewhoeverat tackedhi m wasdanger ous.Maybehe
wascomi ngaf terme, myl i
fewasi ndanger .Iwasgoi ngt odi e, Idon' twantt odieyoung.NoI
don' t.Ihavet ogetoutoft hispl ace.Ihavet ogetoutoft hismar riage.Isatupandt ookmy
phone, i
twasj ustaf ter6.Idi al l
edmymot her '
snumber .Shet ookt hecal lwhenIwasaboutt o
dr opi t.
Her :Yi ntoniekusenikangaka?
Me:Mama. ..
Her :Phumza?
Me:Iwantt ocomehomemama.
Her :Why?Whathappened?
Me:Ij ustwantt ocomehomemama, Ican'tdot his.Myl if
ei s...
Someonegr abbedmyphone, Iqui cklyt urned.I twasMandl a,hedr oppedt hecal l
.
Me:Whatar eyoudoi ng? !
Hi m:Yourl ifeiswhat ?Huh?
Me:Gi vememyphone.
Hi m:Ibr oughtyoubr eakf ast,yit ya.
Heputt hebowl downt henwal kedoutwi t
hmyphone.It ookt hatbowlandt hrowitont hedoor.
Ithi tt hedoort hencr ashedont hef l
oor ,mi lkandcer ealswer eever ywher e.Mandl apissedme
of f!Hewassecr etiveandhear tless.Thedoorswungopenandhepeeked.
Hi m:What '
sgoi ngon?
Hel ookedont hef loor .
Hi m:Oh
Me:Whyar eyousowi ckedt owar dsme?
Hi m:Wi cked?Iam notwi ckedandi fwegoi ngt ot alkt henpl easecomet ot helounge.
Me:You' llgivemewhatIwant ?
Hi m:I '
lltakeyout oyourmansohecan, getupandgetr eady.
Inodded, hecl osedt hedoor .Igotupandwor eagownt henwentt ot hebat hroom tohavea
bat h.Af termybat hIwentt omyr oom t ol otionandgetdr essed.Iwor ewhi teskinnyjeans,
peacht opandsandal st hencombedmyweaveandt iedi t.Imadet hebedt henwentt ogeta
br oom t osweep, aftersweepi ngImademysel fabowlofCheer ios.Af t
eraf ewsecondsMandl a
wal ksi nt ot hel oungedr essed, het akesaspoonandj oinsi n.Weeati nsi l
ence,aftereati
ngI
rinset hebowlandl eavei tint hesi nk.It akeapearandj uicef rom t hef r
idge.
Hi m:Yougoodt ogo?
Inodded.
Hi m:Ij usthopet heywi llallowust oseehi m att hishour .
Het ookhi skeysandwewal kedout , hel ockedt hengavemet hekey.Iputi tinmysl ingbag.
.
Whenwegott othehospi talhebeggedDrDavi stoal lowust oseeYandi sa.
Dr : You' llinterruptmypat ient '
sheal ingpr ocess.
Mandl a:Thi si simpor tant ,i
tsbet weenl ifeanddeat h.
Dr : Itoldyounoupset t
ingnewsf orhi m.
Mandl a:Theynotupset ting, theyj usti mpor tant.
Dr : Okaybutdon' tupsethi m.
Mandl a:Thankyou.
Dr : Hei sst i
llinI CU.
Wenoddedandwentt oseehi m.
.
Me:Yandi savuka.
Ihi thi scheekl ight l
y.
Mandl a:You' lljustsendhi mr ightt ot hecomakewena.
Igavehi mt hatshutupl ook, heputhi shandsup.
Me:Yandi sa? !
Ishookhi m awake, hel ookedatmeandr emovedt hemaskr oughl y.
Yandi sa:W- h-a-t?
Itookhi sboar dandgavei ttohi m becausei tlookedl ikehest il
lhaddi fficultytalki
ng.He
grabbedi tandt hr owi ttowar dst hewal lthenl ookedatMandl a.
Mandl a:Don' tlookatmel iket hat!Shei si mpossi bl
et olookaf t
er.Sheasksal otofquestionsI
cantanswer .
Yandi sal ookedatme.
Me:Hehadagun.
Hel ookedatMandl aandshr uggedhi sshoul ders.
Mandl a:Iwascar efulokay?
Yandi sal ookedatme.
Me:Hepoi ntedi tt ome.
Hel ookedatMandl aangr il
y.
Mandl a:Shesneakeduponme.
Me:Nott rue!Andt hismor ninghet ookmyphone.
Mandl a:Becauseyouwer et ellingyourmot hert hingst hatarenott here.
Me:Soyousayi ngmyl ifeisnoti ndanger ?
Mandl a:No.
Me:Thenwhyar eyouher e? !Whydoyouhaveagun? !
Mandl a:Whoat oneyourvoi cedownorwewi llbet hrownoutofhi sroom.
"B-a-be",It urnedt olookathi m.
Me:Iwantt ogohomeYandi sa, Iwantt ogohome.
Heopenedhi smout hbutwor dswoul dn' tcomeout ,hehi thisheadf rustr at
ed.Mandl atookhis
boar dandgavei ttohim buthet hrewi tagai nstt hewal lagain.
Mandl a:Hayi sukaYandi saungandi qhel ikalok!
Hepoi ntedathi m.
Mandl a:Shewant sanswer s.
Hel ookedatmesoIwentt ogethi sboar d.
Me:You' llwr it
e.( henodded)I smyl i
fei ndanger ?
Heshookhi shead, Il
ookedatMandl a.
Mandl a:That 'swhatIhavebeent r
yingt otellyou.
Me:Thenwhyi shel i
vingi nourapar t
ment ?Whydoeshehaveagun?Whyi shesayi ngit
st o
protectme?Yandi saIwantt het ruth.I smyl ifeindanger ?Youknowwhodi dthist oyou?Ishe
comi ngaf termet oo?
Het hrewt heboar dont hef loorandt ookmyhand.
Me:Ha. aYandi sa!
Heputhi shandupandpul ledmet ot hebed, Isatdown.Heopenedhi smout handcl osedhis
eyes, hecl osedi tandt ouchadeepbr eat h."No", hef i
nallysaid.Andhel ookedpl easedwi t
h
himsel f.Buthewasst illl
ying.
Yandi sa:Ij u-stw- a-ntyout obesa- sa-fe.
Itwasasi fhewasusi nghi sl astst rengt ht otalk, hesoundedl i
keascr atchedCD.Br eakingand
takingabr eakwheneverhef eltlikeit.
Me:Saf ef rom what ?
Het ookadeepbr eathandshookhi shead.
Yandi sa:Ti red.
Me:Real ly?
Mandl a:Sar casm wontgetyouanywher e.
Me:ThenwhydoIneedpr otect ionYandi sa?Iam yourwi feyouhavet ot ellmet het r
uth,
rememberwhatwepr omi sedeachot her ?Honest y.
Yandi sa:T- t
a--keherhome.
Hecl osedhi seyes.
Me:Yandi sa...
Yandi sa:Home.
Mandl a:Comeonl etsgo.
Me:Yandi sa?
Whathewasdoi ngwassel fish, hurtful andf rust rat
ing.Hewasl yingtome, lyi
ngt omyf ace.He
gotmet hinkingmyl i
feisi ndangerbuthewon' tconf ir
mi t
?Hegotmef eelingpar anoidand
scar edf ormyl ifebuthewon' tt ellmewhati sgoi ngon.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Rightaf t
ert heywal kedoutIopenedmyeyes, beingher ewasj ustonehugecur sebecausei fI
wasoutt her eever yt hingwoul dbenor mal .Noneedf orext rapr otection,shewoul dn'tbe
paranoi danddemandi nganswer s.Iwoul dn'thavet ol i
et oher .Icoul dn'ttal ktosavemy
mar riagebecauseIwasscar edt hatIwasgoi ngt oloseher ,Idi dn'twantt oscar eherof f.Iknew
shepr obabl yhat edbutt het r
ut hi ssomet hingIcoul dn'tt ellher , Ididn'twantt ostressher .I
don' twantanot herr epeatofChant elle, count l
essmi scar r i
agesduet ost ress.Iwasl yi
ngt o
protecther , pr otectherf r om mypast .Thel it
tl
esheknew, thebet t
er.Ididn' twanthert ol ivein
fear, consi st ent l
yl ooki ngoverhershoul der .Iwasgoi ngt osor tt hisoutbutIhavet obeoutof
hospi talt odot his.
.
.
Phumza:
Mymi ndwasmadeup, mnanoYandi sawer eover .Idi dn' twanthi m anywher enearme, he
coul dn' ttel lmet het ruth.Thatj ustmademequest ional otoft hi ngsabouthi m andour
mar riage, wasi tbi asedonl i
es?Whatel sewashel yi ngabout ?Honest lyIwashear tbr oken, I
thoughthewoul dbehonestwi thme.
Mandl a:Heydon' tdot hat ,don' tcr ypl ease.
Me:Hedoesn' tlovemeMandl a.
Him:Hedoes. ..
Me:Thenwhywonthet ellmet het ruth?Iam notaski ngf ormuch.
Him:YouknowIhaveknownYandi saf oryear snow, Iknowal lhi spastr el ationshi ps.Iknow
howhewaswi t
hal lthoseot hergi rlsandIknowhowhei swi thyou.Hei sdi ffer
ent ,hel oves
you.Heopeneduphi shear ttoyousodon' tdoubthi sl ovef oryouandi fitl ooksl ikehei sn't
tell
ingyout het rut ht henmaybehei spr otect i
ngyouf rom somet hing.
Me:Iwantt oknowwhatt hatsomet hingi s.
Him:Wel lthat '
syourmi st ake, whati fwhat everhei s" hiding"hur tsyou?For getaboutf inding
outt hi s" trut h",ther ei snot hingt of indout .Nayeel elephahei sconf used.
Me:About ?
Him:Aboutever yt hingt hat 'shappeni ng, hedoesn' tknowwhyhewasat tackedorbywho.He
doesn' tknowwhatt heywant ,
hedoesn' tknowwhet hert heywi llcomeaf teryouornot .Nayehe
i
saspar anoi dasyouar ebutyoudon' thavet obe.Iam her etoensur ethatyouar esaf eatal l
times, Iam her et opr otectyousodon' twor ry.Leavet hewor ryingandst ressi ngt ome.Wena
justr elaxnot hingwi l
lhappent oyouonmywat ch,eveni fyoucan' tseemephysi cal l
yjustknow
thatndi khonawat chi ng.Andnot hingwi llhappent oyou.
Inodded.
Him:Nowwi pet hoset ear s.
Hepul l
edhi st -shi rtandwi pedmyf ace.
Me:Si zoncol a.
Him:Idon' tcar e, asl ongasyou' l
l bebeaut i
fulagain.
Me:CanIbl owmynoset oo?
Hepul l
edhi st -shi rtdown.
Him:Hayi sukauyagezakant i
?
Wel aughed.
Him:Ther ei st hatsmi l
e, itsbeaut iful.
Me:Thankyou.
Him:Nowt hatt het ear sar eoutoft heway, letsgetyoui cecr eam.
Me:Your eadmymi nd.
Hesmi ledandopenedt hedoorf orme, Igoti nandcl osedt henhewentt ohi ssi de.Hegoton
andst ar tedt heengi ne, heputonmusi ct hendr oveout .

27
Phumza:
Dayswentbyr eallyf ast,bef oreIknewi tYandi sawasget t
ingdi schar ged.Iwokeupear l
yt o
clean, Iwant edhi mt ocomehomet oacl eanhome.SoIchangedt hebedcoverandcur t
ains
thenmoppedt hef l
oor .Af termoppi ngIwentt ocooki ntheki tchen.WhenIf inishedcl eani ngt he
ti
mewas9h30andYandi sawasonl yget tingdi schar gedat12h00af terhischeckupt omake
suret hathewasf i
tenought ocomehome, Icoul dn'twaitt ohavehi m home.Imi ssedhi m.Even
thoughIspentever ydaywi thhi mi twasn' tthesame, Imi ssedbei nginhi sar ms, f
allingasl eep
i
nhi sarms, nextt ohi m andwaki ngupnextt ohi m.Imi ssedhear i
nghi svoiceever yni ght
befor eIfell asleepandwaki ngupt ohi sbr oadandbol dvoi ce.Iwast iredofhear i
ngMandl a's
voiceever ymor ningandbef oreIwentt obed, Iwant edt owakeupt omyhusband' svoi ceagai n.
Don' tgetmewr ongMandl awasgoodt ome, het reatedmer eall
ywel landIwasgoi ngt omi ss
hiscompanybutIj ustwant edmyhusbandhome.Imi ssedhi scompanymor e.AnywayIwent
tohaveabat h, l
eavi ngLubanzii nt hel ounge, Mandl awasatwor k.Aftermybat hIwentt omy
room t olotionandgetdr essed.Iwor eashor tblackmaxi dressandcar amelsandal s,Icombed
myweaveandt i
edi tthenwentt ot ol ounge.Lubanzit urnedt olookatmeasIwal kedi n.
Lubanzi :Looki ngbeaut iful asal ways.
Me:Thankyou.
Hegotupandwentt otheki tchen.
Him:Imadeyoubr eakf ast , sitplease.
Me:ThankyoubutIam nothungr y, Ijustwantust oheadt ot hehospi talalready.
Him:I tsstillear l
y, west il
l haveahour .
Me:Iwantt obet heref orhi scheckup.
Him:Atl easthavej uice, youcar ryingal if
ei nyou.
Me:I 'l
lhavei tint hecar ,yizanayo.( henodded)Letmegogetmybag.
Him:Okay, wemeet i
nghi spar ent st here.
Me:Nopr obl em!
Itookmyphoneandputi tint hebagt hendi dmyeyebr ows.Iputonaeyel inerandmascar a
thenpur plel i
pstick.Thenaf terIt ookmybagandYandi sa'sbag.Iwentt othel oungewi tht hem.
Luba:Letmecar ryt hatf oryou.
Me:I tsnotevenheavybutt hankyou.
Igavehi mt hebag, hesmi led.
Him:Don' tf orgetyourj uice.
Hepoi ntedt ot heki tchencount er.
Me:Thankyou.
Itooki tthenf oll
owedaf terhi m, Ilockedt hedoorbehi ndust henwentdownst airstohi scar .He
openedt hedoorf orme, Igoti nandcl osedt henhewentt ohi sside.Het hr
ewYandi sa'sbagi n
thebackseatt hengotonandst ar t
edt hecar .Anddr oveust ot hehospi t
al.
.
Wegoti nhospi t
alandf oundhi smot hersi tt
ingont hewai ti
ngchai rs,wewal kedovert oher .
Surpr i
singlyhi spar ent sdi dn' tmi ndt hatYandi sa'sf ri
endswer elookingaf t
erme, itsl i
ket hey
alsof earedsomeonecomi ngaf t
erme.
Me:Mol omama.
Shegotupandhuggedme.
Her :Mol obaby, unj ani?
Webr oket hehug.
Me:Iam goodmamawenaunj ani ?
Her :Iam goodt oobaby.Lubanzit hankyouf orlookingaf t
erherf orus.
Him:Nopr obl em mama, Yandi sai sl ikeanol derbr othertomesot hatmakesPhumzamysi ster
-i
n-law.
Shesmi led.
Her :Iam r eal l
yhappymysonhasf riendsl ikeyou.
Me:Speaki ngabouthi m, wher eishe?
Her :Wi t
hhi sdoct or ,Yandi sadoesn' twantmei nt herewi thhi m.
Me:Andyouknowwhymama, hedoesn' twantyout ofussoverhi m.
Hismot herwasf ussy, toof ussywheni tcamet ohim.
Her :Iknow.
Me:Letmegogi vet heset ohi m.
Her:Thenwecant akehi m home.
Me:Yeahndi yeza.
Itookt hebagf r om Lubanzi andwal kedt oYandi sa'
swar d,DrDavi swasi nther ewithhi m.
.
Me:Mor ning, howi she?
Dr:Readyt ogohomebutheshoul dt akei teasy, hehasn' tfull
yheal edyet.
Me:Atl ast ,Ipr omi set ol ookaf terhi m.
Hel aughed.Kal okuever yt imehi sdoct orwant edt odischar gehi m somet hingal wayscameup.
Ther ewer ej ustsomanycompl icat ionsnj eall ofasuddent hatIwasst arti
ngt othinkt he
universedi dn' twantust obet oget heranymor e,whi chwoul dber eallyunfair.Iwasal readyin
l
oveandpr egnantf orhi m soi tcoul dn'thappenl i
ket hat.Iwal kedovert ohi m andpeckedhi s
l
ips.
Me:Ar eyour eady?
Him:AsI '
lleverbe, di dyoubr ingmycl othes?
Me:Ewebabe, theonesyouwant ed.
Him:Thankyou( hecar essedmyf acegent l
y)awusemhl e.
Me:Thankyou.
Hepeckedmyl ipst henopenedt hebagandt ookouthi sclothes.Hewasbackt ohi snormal
selfandl ooksagai n, Icoul dn'tevent ell t
hatheoncehadbr ui
sesal loverhisf ace.
Dr:Pleasesi gnt hesef or msf ormet henhewi l
lbef reet ogo.
Hegavemedi schar gef orms, Isignedt hem t hengavet hem backt ohi m.Hegavemeabr own
paperbag.
Dr:Thi sishi smedi cat ion, makesur ehet akesi tever ydayaf t
erhismeal .Noal coholwhi l
eyou
ont hem andpl easef ol l
owt hei nst ruct ionswr i
ttenout si
deeachbot t
le.
Inodded.
Me:I '
llmakesur ehef ol l
owsi nst ruct ions.
Dr:Thenhei sf reet ogo.
Ilookedathi m, hewasdoneget tingdr essed.Hegavemet hebagt hengotup.
Him:Thankyoudocyour eallysavedmyl i
fe.
Dr:Iwasj ustdoi ngmyj obbuti twasapl easur e,youmademyj obver yeasy.
Him:I twasmypl easur et oo.
Theyl aughedandshookhands.
Dr:Takever ygoodcar eofher ,shei sakeeper .
Him:IknowandIwi ll.
Heki ssedt hesi deofmyhead.
Him:Let sgomyl ove, doct or?
Dr:Saf ej our ney.
Us:Thankyou.
Wewal kedoutoft hewar dandwal kedovert omom andLubanzi .Shesmi l
edwhenshesawher
son, i
twast hef i
rstt imeembonasi ncehehasbeeni nher esoIcoul dimagi nehowshewas
feeli
ng.
Her:Heybaby, ohmyson.
Yandi sa:Mamam.
Theyhugged.
Her:Awusemhl exhego, Imi ssedyou.
Yandi :Imi ssedyout oomama.
Theybr oket heembr aceandwewal kedt owar dst heexi t.
Her:Youdon' tl ookl ikeyouwer ei nhospi tal.
Yandi :Itsbeenamont hmama.
Her:Whydi dn' tyoual lowust oseeyou?Wear eyourpar entsYandi sa.
Yandi :Iknowmama, Idi dn'twantt ost ressyou.
Her:Iwasst ressedndi ngakuboni .
Yandi :Iknowmamaandt hat '
swhyIdi dn'tletyoui n, Ididn'twantyout ofussoverme.Jonga
nangokuyouher einst eadofr estingathome.
Her:Icoul dn' tbaby.
Lubanziopenedt hebackseatpassengerdoor sformeandmamawhi l
eYandi sat ookthefront
passengerseat .Wegoti nandcl osed, hewentt ohi ssi de,goti nandstartedt heengi nethen
droveout .
.
Whenwegott ot heapar tmentLubanzipar kedt henwegotof fandwal kedintot hebui l
ding.
Luba:Youdon' tlookt oopl easedt hathei sback.
Hewhi sper edi nmyear .
Me:Iam.
Luba:But ?
Me:Iam f eel i
ngal itt
lel eftout .
Yandi sa'smot herwasal loverhi m sohewasn' tpayi ngat tentiontomeandIwant edhi m allt
o
mysel f.
Luba:Shemi ssedhi m.
Me:YeahIam bei ngsi ll
yr i
ght ?
Luba:Youmi ssedhi mt oo.
Inoddedandunl ockedt hedoor .Wewal kedi n.
Me:Mamayoucansi tdown, Iam justgoi ngt oputt hesedownt henIwilldishupf oryou.
Her:Thankyoumakot i.
Inoddedandwentt omybedr oom t oputt hebagsdownt henIwentbackt othef ront .Iwarmed
upt hef oodt hendi shedupandser vedever yone, Ijoinedt hem too.
Her:Yandi sakhawut showhodi dt histoyou?
Yandi saj ustshr uggedhi sshoul dersandcont i
nuedeat ingwi thoutevenlooki ngather ,l
olheh
ayuYandi sa.
Him:Imi ssedyourf oodst handwasam, kumnandi .
Me:I fyouwantmor eIcandi shupf oryou.
Him:Mostdef i
ni t
elyst handwasam butonl ywhenyoudoneeat i
ng.
Inodded.
Ma:Makot ihowi st hepr egnancyt reatingyou?Haveyouwentf oracheckup?
Ishookmyhead, Ididn' tknowIhadt ogof orcheckups.
Her:Youar esupposedt ogokal okbabyj ustt omakesur ethatthebabyi sgr owingandheal t
hy.
Yandi :I'
lltakehert oadoct orksasa, I
'l
lneedmycarback.I phi?
Her:You' l
lhavet oseeyourf atherabouti tandhewant stot al
kt oyouaboutwhathappenedt o
you.
Yandi :Ican' trememberanyt hingaboutt hatdaysoandazwhathewant sf r
om me, Ijustneed
mycarbackqha.
Her:Usi lekewenaYandi sa,wear econcer nedpar entsapha.
Yandi :Sor ryma.
Aftereat ingIgotupt odi shupf orYandi saagai nt hendi dt hedishes.
Luba:I '
llbeonmywaynow, boywewi llcheckyoul ater.
Yandi :Shar pI '
llcallyou.
Luba:Okay, mamani salekahl eandPhumzat hankyouf ort hemeal .
Me:Anyt ime.
Yandi :Boypl easedr opof ftheol ediathome, Iwantsomeal onet i
mewi thmywi fe.
Luba:Nopr oblem.
Mama:Yuhndaxhot hwa, wewi l
lseeyoul ater.Makot ipleasecook.
Yandi :Youi nvi ti
ngyour selfoverf ordi nnernaol edi?
Mama:Ewendi zot hini wemi ssedyou.
Yandi :Nopr oblem mamam youcancomeoverj ustasl ongasyouwontt al
kaboutt heat t
ack,I
justwantt ohaveagoodt imewi thmyf ami l
y.Tel ldadt oo.
Mama:I 'lltalkt oyourf ather.
Yandi :Thankyou.
Mama:Al rightIwi l
lseeyoul ater,getsomer est.Iloveyou.
Sheki ssedhi sf orehead.
Yandi :OkaymamaIam notababyanymor e.
Hewi pedhi sf oreheadandshesmi led.
Mama:You' llalwaysbemybaby, Il oveyou.
Yandi :Iloveyout oomama.
Mama:OkayI '
llseeyoul ater.
Shecamet ogi vemeahugt hent heywal kedoutbenoLubanzi .Yandi sagotupassoonast hey
walkedoutandcamet ost andnextt ome.
Him:Imi ssedyou.
Me:Imi ssedyout oo.
Heki ssedt hesi deofmyheadt henpul l
edmet ohi m andwr appedhi sar msar oundmywai st.
Him:Howi sourbaby?
Me:Ihavenoi deabutheorshesur emakesmesi ck.
Him:What '
swr ong?
Me:Somet imesIgethear tburnandsomet i
mesIf eelwoozy, Ican' teatchi ckenanymor e.
Him:Iam sor r yst handwasam.
Me:AndIgetmor ni ngsi cknessesandevenni ghtsi cknesses.
Him:Maybet hedoct orcanpr escr i
besomet hingt ostopmaki ngyouwoozyandf orthe
hear tbur n.
Me:Hmm howar eyou?
Him:Goodnowt hatyoui nmyar ms.
Me:Ohyeah?
Iwr appedmyar msar oundhi sneck.
Him:Butyouknowwhatwoul dmakemeevenbet ter?
Me:Tel lme.
Him:Thi s.
..
Heki ssedmyl ips, justababyki ss.Ismi led.
Him:Andt his( hepeckedmyl ipsagai n)andmor eoft his..
.
Weshar edal ongpassi onateki ss, whi chImi ssed.
Me:NowImi ssedt his.
Hel iftedmeup.
Me:Car efulnow.
Heputmeont opoft heki tchencount erandgotbet weenmyl egs.
Him:Thi sisnot hingbabeIam st rong.
Me:Yousur e?
Him:Uhmm. ..
Heki ssesmyl ips, Iki ssedhi m backi mmedi ately.Heputhi shandsonmyt highsandpushed
thedr essup.
Me:Wei nt heki tchenYandi sa.
Him:Iknow.
Hel iftedmeupandpul ledt hedr essf urtherupt henpul ledmypant ydown, Ikickedi toffashe
tookof fhispant sf oll
owedbyhi sboxer s.Hel i
ftedmeupagai nandputmedown, turnedme
around.Heki ckedmyl egsapar tandpul ledmywai sttowar dshi mt henent er
edmef rom behind,
Ibreat hedoutl oud.
Him:Yougood?
Me:Yeah. ..
Heunzi ppedmydr essandpul l
edi tupandof fmybodyt henst artedt hrustingi nandoutofmy
vjay.Heki ssedt hebackofmyneckal lthewaydownmyspi net henpul ledmywai sttowar ds
himr oughl y, Imoanedoutl oud.Heunhookedmybr aandt ooki tof fthenst arteddr i
ll
ingme
reallyf astandhar d, i
tfeltgoodbuti twasal i
tt
lepai nfulaswel l.Het urnedmear oundandl if
ted
meupandwentt osi tdownont hecouchwi thmeont opofhi m, It ookof fhist -
shirtthenkissed
hischestt henhi sbandage.ThenIr odehi mjustthewayhewant edmet o, hewasdi recti
ngmy
everymove.

28
Yandisa:
Itwasgoodt obehome, j
ustbeingnextt
omywi fegotmebuzzi ng.IneverthoughtIcoul dlove
herthishardwit
hinsuchashortperi
odoftime,wehavebeenmar ri
edfor2mont hsand3
weeksbuti tf
eelsl
ikewehavebeenmar ri
edforyears.Ourl
ovehasbeent ested,t
heuni ver
se
hastri
edt okeepusapartbutherewearegoingstr
ong.Imaginebeingmar riedforthatmuchof
ti
meandyouhaveonl yspent3weekswi t
hyourpartner,
notmanyr elat
ionshipssurvivesot he
factt hatwewer ei neachot her s' armswasahugebl essing.Ij ustf eltblessedandscar edatthe
samet i
me, t
her ei sal otgoi ngoni nmyl i
ferightnowandshedoesn' tknowj erkabouti t.
"Whatar eyousmi lingabout ?What 'sonyourmi nd? ",
Idi dn'
tr ealiseIwassmi l
ingtil
lIhear dher
ask.Iki ssedherf or ehead.
Me:Iwasj ustt hinki ng.
Shel ai donhert ummyandl ookedatme.
Her :AboutmeIhope.
Me:Aboutyouof cos.
Shesmi ledandki ssedmyl ips, justasof tpeck.Ismi ledandcar essedhercheek, thinking;"Was
sheal wayst hisbeaut iful?"Iswearshej ustgotpr ett
ierwhi leIwasi nt hathospi t
al.
Her :Your eallyscar edme.
Me:Idi dn' tmeant o, sor ry.
Sheki ssedmychestt henr estedherheadoni t.
Her :Isi tst il
lpai nf ul ?
Me:Notasmuchasi twas3weeksago, i
tsbet t
ernow.I tsonlywhenIt ouchi tthatIfeelpain.
Her :Hhmmm. ..Ibet tergetupnowsoIcanwasht hosepot st henst artcooki ng.
Iwr appedmyar msar oundherwai st.
Me:Hu- huhdon' tgo, st ayi nbedwi thmej ustal i
ttlewhi lelonger .
Her :Ican' t,yourf ami l
ywi llbeher esoonsoIhavet ogetupandcookf orthem Idon' twant
them t ot hinkIam l azy.
Me:NcaaabutIdon' twantyout ogetoutofbed.
Shel aughed.
Her :Thepuppydogeyesl ookwontcuti t,Ihavet o.
Me:Gi vemewhati sduet omef ir
stt henyoucango.
Sher aisedherheadandmetmehal fway, weshar edaki sswhi chwasdi sturbedbymyphone
ri
ngi ng.Webr oket heki ssandIl ookedatmyphone.Thescr eenwasal lcr
acked, Iser i
ouslyhad
togetanewphone.
Her :Letmel eaveyout ot aket hat ,
joinmei nt heshower .
Me:Idef initelywi ll.
Ikissedherf or eheadt henl ethergo, shegotoutofbedandpul ledat owel.Wr appedi taround
herbodyt henwal kedout , Itookt hecal lassoonasshewal kedout .
Me:Tal kt ome.
Mandl a:Theboyshear dt hatyougotdi schar gedt odaysot heywantt omeetyout onight.
Me:Aahnott oni ght , Ijustwantt ospendi twithmyf ami ly.
Him:SowhatdoIt el lthem?Theywer elookingf or wardt other eunion.
Me:Tel lt hem t hatIcan' tdot oni ght ,Iwantt ospendt imewi thmywi fe.
Him:Under st andabl esoIguessI 'l
lbeseei ngyout omor row?
Me:Def initelyt omor row.
Him:Al rightshar p.
Me:Shar p.
Ihungupandgotoutofbed.Iwentt ojoinmywomani ntheshower .
.
.
Phumza:
Aftershower ingwegotoutoft heshowerandwentt oourr oom, wel otionedandgotdr essed
thenwentt ot hef ront .Ourcl otheswer eallovert heki tchenandl oungesoIpi ckedthem upand
wentt oputt hem i nt hewashi ngbaskett henwashedmypant y.Af terdoi ngsoIwentt owash
thepot s.
Yandi sa:Babear eyoubusy?
Me:Yeahwhy?
Hej ustaskedt hemostobvi ousquest i
ons.
Him:I '
m hungr y.
Me:I 'llfixyouasandwi chaf terr insingt hispotne?
Him:Thankyoubabe, wher ei st her emot e?
Me:Nextt ot het vwet huYandi sa.
Hechuckl edandgotupt ot akei t.Irinsedt hepott henmadehi m asandwi ch,Ipouredhi mj ui
ce
i
nagl asst henser vedhi m.
Hi m:ThankyouMr sDl ami ni.
Ismi ledandwentt ost ar tont hecooki ng.
Me:Wi l
lMandl abej oini ngus?
Hi m:Nope!Iam homenowsowewontbeneedi nghi m anymor e.
Me:Okay.
.
.
Yandi sa:
3hour sl ater ..
.
Myf ami lywasatourdoor st ep, knocki ng.Igotupt owelcomet hem becausePhumzawasbusy.
Ol wethuandZet hul i
ter allyt hr ewt hemsel vesatme, Ithi
nkImi ghthavescar edal otofpeopl e.
Itwasn' tonl yPhumzawhowasscar edofl osi ngme.
Me:Ouchyouguys.
Theyl etgoonmeandl ookedatme.
Ol wethu:Whywer en' tweal l
owedt oseeyou?
Me:Youseei ngmenowsof or getaboutt hepast .
Zet hu:Whoat .
.
Me:It houghtImademysel fcl ear, Idon' twantt otalkaboutit.
Dad:Whynot ?Youknowwhodi dt hatt oyou?Doyouknowwhyt heyat t
ackedyoui npar ti
cular?
Me:Tat aIdon' tokay?Idi dn'tseet heirfaces, itcoul dhavebeenanyone.
Dad:Wer eyoui nvol vedi nanyki ndoff i
ghtsorar gument s?Youmustsuspectsomeone.
Me:OhmyGodt at awi llyoul eti tgo?Eveni fIsuspectsomeoneIdon' twantyourhel p,Ican
fightmyownbat tl
est at a.
Phumza:Fi ghtyourownbat tles?
Zet hu:Yandi sat hesepeopl eneedt obecaughtandputbehi ndbar s,theyaredanger ous.
Mom:Iagr ee, t
heyst oleyourf il
ebaby.Theyar ecapabl eofdoi nganyt hi
ng.
Dad:Wewer ewor riedaboutyouZi zi,west i
llare.Whati fthisper soncomesbackt ofinishyou
of f
?
Me:Oht atanot hingwi llhappent ome.
Dad:Zi zi..
.
Me:Tat apl ease!Ij ustwantt oenj oyt hisnightwi thyou,allofyousopl easedr opthis.
Henodded.
Me:Thankyou.
Phumzagotupandwentt ot heki tchent odi shupf oreveryone, t
hensheser vedus.Wewer e
eat i
ngandt alkingnj ebutt her ewast ensi onbet weenmeanddad, Ididn'
twanthi shelp.Icoul d
dot hisbymysel f.
Me:Tat amom sai dIshoul dt al ktoyouaboutmycar .
Hi m:It houghtyouwoul dwanti tback, i
tspar kedi nthegar ageathome.
Me:Thankyouf orf indi ngi t.
Hi m:Iwoul ddoanyt hi ngf oryouson.
Me:IknowdadandIappr eci at eital l
,Ido.
Hi m:Whenwi llyouf et chi t?
Me:Toni ght .
Hi m:Nopr obl em.
Inoddedandf i
ni shedeat i
ng.Whenever yonewasdonePhumzagotupandt ookthedi shest o
theki tchent henser vedusdr inks.
Tat a:Thankyoumakot ithatwasdel i
cious.
Her :Thankyou.
Mama:Youshoul dt eachmeaf ewofyourr eci pes.
Her :Nopr obl em mama.
Tat a:Wehavet ogetgoi ngnowbef oreyourmot herasksyout oshowherr i
ghtnow.
Mama:Awut atakhewhat '
st her ush?
Tat a:Someofushavebusi nessest or un, wehaveear l
ymor nings.
Heownedapanel beat er /mechani cwor kshop.I twassomet hi
nghuge.
Mama:Thenwebet tergetgoi ng, youshoul dvi sitmesomet i
me.Ndi yaborekawhenever yoneis
atwor kandschool .
Phumza:Iwi llmama.
Mama:Iwi llbeexpect ingyou.
Shenodded.
Phumza:Ni hambekahl emama.
Mama:Thankyoubaby.
Tata:Zizi.
Igotupast heygotup.
Me:I '
llgowi thyou.BabeI 'l
lbebackj ustnow, yes?
Phumza:Okay.
Me:Lockanddon' topenf oranyone.
Shenodded, Iki ssedherf oreheadt henwal kedoutwi t
hot ata.
Tata:You' l
ldr ivef orme.
Hegavemehi skey.
Me:Nopr obl em.
Igotint hedr iver sseatwhi l
eever yoneel segoti nthepassengerseat s.Istartedt heengi neand
droveushome.
.
WhenwegothomeIpar kedt henwegotof fandwenti nsidet hehouse, mom unl ockedandwe
walkedi n.
Mama:Ol wet hugogetyourbr ot her '
skey.
Olwethu:Si phi ?
Tata:Wher eIputal lthecarkeys, Zizicanwehaveawor dphandl e?
Whatdoest hi sol dmanwantnow?Inoddedandf oll
owedaf terhim.Het ookoutsomet hi
ng
fr
om hi spocket , Iwassur prisedt oseet hatitwasaci gar ett
e.Hel ighti tthent ookal ongpuf f
.
Me:Yousmoke?
Him:Thi si sn' taboutme.Makesur et hatyoudon' tputt hatyounggi rl'
sl i
feindanger .
Me:Dad?
Him:Youhear dme.
Hel ookedatme, hel ookedangr y.
Him:Whatdoyout hinkyouar edoi ngYandi sa?
Me:Idon' tknowwhatyout al kingabout .
Hegavemeonehar dunexpect edsl apacr ossmyf ace.
Me:Tat a?!
Irubbedmycheekandl ookedathi mi nshock, dadhasneverl aidahandonme.
Him:Whatdi dIt ellyouaboutt hatl ife?!Youwi lldieboy.
Me:Nakunj ewenayounotdead.
Hegr abbedabatt hatwasnextt ohi m andhi tmyar m ver yhar d,Ihel dmyscr eam i njustfor
mom' ssake.Idi dn' twanthert of indoutwhatki ndofmanherhusband, myf atherwas.Hewas
adrugl ord, justnotagangst er .Wel lthat'
swhathesai dandhehasbeent r
yingt opr otectme
fr
om t hatlifef oryear s,hedi dn' twantmei nhi s" busi ness"norhangar oundt hebadcr owdbut
didIeverl isten?NoIt ooki nter esti nJer omeandhi sl i
fe, Ithoughti twascool .Ithoughthewas
cool,power ful, peopl erespect edhi m andhewas/ is" weal thy".Iwant edt hattoosowhen
Chant ell
eint roducedmeasherboyf ri
endhet ookmeunderhi swi ng, heschool edme.AndIf elt
l
ikeIhadt oi mpr esshi m sot hathewoul dhavenopr oblem wi t
hmet odat i
nghi sonl ydaughter.
Ididreallyst upi dt hingst oi mpr esshi m andi twor kedbutwhenhewentt ojailheki ckedmeout
ofthegang, hemademepr omi set opr otecthi sdaught erandl iveal egitlif
e,crimef ree.Get
goodeducat ionandal egitjob, andIdi djustt oi mpr esshi m anddad.Buti tdidn'tlookl i
ke
Jeromewasi mpr essedatal l.
Him:Youst eppedyourf eetonaver ydanger ousman' st erri
toryboy.
Me:Icanhandl ehi m.
Hechuckl ed.
Him:Youcanhandl ehi m?Henear l
yki ll
edyou.
Me:Buthedi dn' t.
Him:Buthewi ll
, Jer omei snotst upid.Hewi lltakeyoudownandhewi llmakesur et hatyou
neverr i
seagai n.Hewi lldest royyou, youcan' taf f
or dtomakeanenemyofhi m.
Ifther ei sanyonewhoknewJer ome' scapabi li
ties, itwasme.Hewasar uthless, hear t
lessand
coldbl oodedmur der er.Buthewasal soaf at
her ,hehadasof tsi det ohi m.
Me:Youshoul dhavet houghtoft hatbef oreyouf orcedmet omar ryyourbestf riend' sdaught er.
Him:Nonono!Don' tpi nt hisonme!It ol dyout ost ayawayf rom t hatgi rl
, t
heywer eusi ngyou.
Me:Mxm Chant ell
eandIwer einl ove!
Him:Butwasi tenough?Youwoul dn' thavemar riedPhumzai fyouwer esoi nl ovewi tht hatgirl
.
Anddi dyouhonest lyt hinkt hatIwasgoi ngt owat chyoudat emyr ival'sdaught er?Br ingmy
wor stenemyi nourhome?Br eakapr omi seImadet oaf riendbecauseoft hatloosegi r l
?No!
Me:Doyouknowt hatt hatsamegi rlyoucal l
ingl oosemi ghtbet hemot herofyourf i
rst
grandchi ld?Myson.
Him:Youwoul dn' tbet hatst upid!
Me:Idon' tknowt ataChant ellemi scar riagedsoIdon' tknow.ButIdon' twantyout ofightmy
battlesf orme, st ayoutofi tpl ease.
Him:Wewer eenemi esevenbef or eyoubecamehi senemy.
Me:Whi chyoudi dn' tcar eaboutanymor e.
Him:Het ouchedmysonandyouknowIwoul dki llforyou.
Me:Leti tgo, pl ease.
Him:Iwontl eti tgobutyouwi ll
.Idon' twantyout ol i
vet hisl ife,itsdanger ous.Ihavewor kedso
hardt omakesur et hatyouandyoursi stersar esomet hingandyousomewher e, Iwentagai nst
everyt hingIbel ievedi nj ustt omakesur et hatyoudon' thavet ogot hroughwhatIhadt ot o
rai
seyou.If orbi dyouf rom t hisl ifeyouwantt ol i
ve, i
tsnotf oryou.
Me:Het hr eatenedmywi fe, het hr eatenedt orapeandki l
lmywi fe.
Him:Leavehi mt ome.Justf ocusonpr otectingyourwi fe,shei spr egnant .Sheneedsyou, your
sonordaught erwi llneedyout oowhent heyar ebor n.Andt hechi ldyout hinkyouhavewi th
Chant elle, l
ooki ntoi t.Ifhei syour soral ivemakesur et hatyout her ef orhim, beagoodf ather
tohi m aswel l.Youhaveal ott olivef or ,l
eavehi mt ome.
Inoddedandwenti nsi det ogetmykey.Thenwal kedout .
Me:Hei sdanger ous, don' tunder est i
mat ehi m.
Ifear edf ormyol dman, Ididn'twanthi mt odot his.Iknowhi m andJer omeal wayswant edt o
sil
enceeachot herbutIdon' twanti ttohappenonmyaccount .
Him:Iknow, I'llbecar ef ul.
Me:Il oveyouol dman.
Him:Il oveyout ooson.
Wehuggedt henheki ssedmyf or ehead.Iwentt ot hegar aget ogetmycar , myphonebeeped
asIst ar tedt heengi ne.It ooki tout ,itwasamessagesoIvi ewedi t
;"lookout side" .Lookout side?
Ihear dsever albangsoundscomi ngf rom out side, itwasr eal lyloudandqui ck.I tdidn'teven
l
ast20seconds, Iremember edt hatIl ef tdadout side.
Me:Dad!
Iopenedt hedoorandr anout ,t
hewhol ef ami lywasout sidecr yi
ngoverdad.Ikneel eddown
befor ehi m, ther ewasbl oodcomi ngoutofhi smout h.Theygothi m, theyr eallygothi m.
Me:Tat a?
Tear sf el loutofmyeyesi mmedi at ely.Het ookmyhandandshookhi sheadsl owl y.
Him:Zi zimendon' tcr y.
Ismi ledandwi pedmyt ears, hesmi ledaswel lthenl ookedatmymom andmi medsomet hingI
couldn' tmakeout .If elthi sgr i
ponmyhandl oosenabi tandi thi tme, wehadt ogethi mt o
hospi tal .
Me:Weneedt ogethi mt ohospi tal ,Ol wet husukanimar n!
Ipushedt hem t hengotupandr anbackt omycar ,itwasst illint hegar age.Igoti nanddr ove
outasf astasIcoul d.Ipar kedr i
ghtbyt hest epsandgotof ft heIopenedt hebackseatdoor s.
Me:Zet huhel pmecar ryhi mi nt hecaruyekeukukhal aapha! !
Shequi ckl ywi pedherf acet henhel pedmel i
fthi m upandwecar r
iedhi mt omycar .Mom goti n
withhi m.
Olwet hu:Bhut i...
Me:Cal lMandl aandt ellhi mt ocomel ookaf teryou, dadwi l
lbeokay.
TheynoddedsoIgoti nt hecaranddr oveoutt hent othehospi tal.
29
Yandi sa:
..
.
"Yandi sa", shesai di nal owvoi ce.It urnedf oraqui ckgl anceather ,tearswer er unningdown
hercheeks.
Me:Tel lhimt ohol don, wewi llbet her ei naf ewmi nut es.
Her :Yandi sa!Zi zi youcan' tdot histome, youcan' tpl ease.
Shepul ledmyt -shi rtr oughl y, IknewIhadt ost op.Ipul ledoverkuf reewayandl ookedather
thenatdad.Hewasj ustst ar i
ngbl ankl yatmom, shewassl appi nghi scheeksandshaki nghi m
wi t
ht ear sr unni ngdownhercheeksbutt her ewasnor esponsef rom hi m.Fuckno!Tear sf ell
from myeyesi mmedi ately.
Mama:Yandi sadosomet hing!Hecan' tdi eYandi sa!Pl ease!
Iwi pedmyf aceandt ur nedt ol ookatt hef astcar st hatwer epassi ngusby.
"Yandi sa!Dosomet hi ngpl ease!Ndi yakucel aYandi sa!Hei syourf atherpl easedosomet hing!",
shebegged.Iwi pedt het ear st hatwer ef alli
ngdownmycheeksandst ar
teddr ivingsl owly, I
honest lydi dn' tknowwhatt odoanymor e.Idi dn'tknowwher et ogoanymor e,carswer ehoot i
ng
behi ndmeandIcoul dn'tcar el essaboutt hem.Ij ustl ostmyf ather,hej ustt ookhi slastbr eat h
i
nmycar ,inmymot her '
shandswhi lewewer edr ivi nghi mt ogethel p.If ail
edhi m, Ireallydi d.
Maybei fIdr ovef ast er ,maybehewoul dst il
lbeal ive.Ij ustdr ovear oundt ownandendedupat
thebeach, Ipar kedandgotof ft hecar .Isear chedmypocket s,Ineededasmoke.Ineeded
somet hingt omaket hi spai ngoawaybutt her ewasnot hingbesi desmyphone, Iwal kedaway
from thecarandst oodatadi st ance.Ij ustl ett het ear sout .
"Yandi sa", Iqui ckl ywi pedmyt ear sandl ookedather .Shehadst oppedcr yi
ng, shewascover ed
i
ndad' sbl ood.
Me:Ma?
Her :Whatdowedonow?
Ishr uggedmyshoul der sandl ookedatt hewat er .
Her :Hei sst illint her e.
Me:Howdowegoonwi thoutdad?
Her :Ihavenoi dea.
Iwentdownandsquat ted.Icoul dn'tgetmyheadar oundwhatj usthappened, didIr eallylose
myf ather ?Myher o?Onemi nut ehei sal iveandt alki ngandt henexthei sdead, l
ifeint hislifeis
reallyshor tanddanger ous.Igotmywakeupcal l.Idi dn' twantt obepar tofi t
,Iwasn' tcutout
forit.Ther ewasar easonIwal kedawayf rom i t,whywasIgoi ngt oal l
owt hereleaseofJer ome
dragmebacki ni t?Ihaddonesowel lformysel f, Ihadawi feandababyont heway.They
neededme, Icoul dn' tputmyl ifeont hef i
r i
ngl i
nel ikedad.Atl easthegott oseeusgr owand
becomesomet hingi nl ife, enj oyedhi smar riage.Whataboutme?Iwasdi st ur
bedbymom' s
touchf r
om myt hought s, Il ookedupather .
Her :Yout hemanoft hehousenow, youhavet obest rong.
Ishookmyheadandwi pedmyf ace, Idi dn' twantt obest rong, Ididn'twantt obet hemanon
thehouse.Idi dn' tdeser vei t,Ij usttookmyownf at her '
sl ife.Hewasgonebecauseofme.
Maybei fIdi dn' tdat eandbr eakChant elle'shear thewoul dbeal i
ve,Ishoul dhavel istenedwhen
het oldmet ost ayawayf rom her .
Her :Youneedt ocal lyouruncl esandl ett hem knowaboutwhatj usthappened.( Inoddedand
l
ookeddown)Yandi sa. ..
Me:Ma?
Her :Yourf at herhat edseei ngyouweak, don' tdot hi spl ease.( Inoddedandwi pedmyt ears)
Her :Wehavet ot akeyourf athert oamor tuar y, gohomet ogetcl eanedupandgetr est .It
s
goingt obeal ongweek, mont handyear .
Itookoutmyphoneanddi alledMandl a, het ookt hecal limmedi atel
y.
.
Him:Boy?
Me:Iam att hebeach.
Him:Doi ngwhat ?
Isni ff
ed.
Me:Justcomeher e.
Him:OkayI 'llbet here.
Ihungupandcal ledt heunder t
akerpeopl etocomet akehimt henIgotup.
Mama:Yandi sa...
Me:Mamapl ease!Pl easeman!
Seriousl yIwant edt obeal one!Iwal kedt owar dsthecarandopenedt hebackseatpassenger
door ,Iwant edt oseei fhewasr eall
ygonewi t
hmyownt woeyes.Maybehewasn' t
,maybehe
wasst il
lalive.Maybemom waswr ong, maybei twasal lupi nherhead.
Me:Tat a?( Ishookhi m)Tat apleasewakeup.Tat a!
"Hei sgonebaby, lethi m go"
Me:Hecan' tbegonemama, hecan' t.
Her:Baby. ..(shepul ledmeawayf rom hi m andhuggedme)hushnow, please.
Ipushedherandsatdownwi t
hmybackagai nstthecar ,
Ijustwant edt obeal one.
.
30mi nutesl ater...
Mandl a'
scarpar kednextt omi neandhegotof f.Mom wassi tti
ngnextt omenowandr est
ing
herheadonmyshoul der ,shewascr yi
ngagai n.Mandl asatdownnextt omom.
Him:Whyar eyousi ttingher eli
ket his?Shoul dn'tyoubeatt hehospi t
al?
Me:Howar et hey?
Him:Wor ri
ed, howi st heol dman?
Me:Li feless.
Him:Whatdoyoumean?
Me:Hei sgone.
Him:Sowher eishenow?
Me:I nher e, Iwantyout ot akemom homet ogetr est .Shehasbeent hroughal ot.
Him:Okay.Thest reet sar esur r
oundedbypol iceofficers,thenei ghbour scall
ed.Theywant
answer s.
Me:Noneofushaveanswer s,wedon' tknowwhathappened.
Him:Butt heywantyousi nceyouwer ewi thhim out sidewheni tallhappened.
Her:Yandi sa. .
Me:Ma?
Her:Whathappened?Whodi dt hi
st oyourf at
her ?
Me:Idon' tknowmama, Iwentt ogetmycarf rom thegar age.Nextt hingIhear dgunshots,I
don'tknow.
Her:Whocoul dbesohear tl
ess?Myhusbandwasj ustani nnocent ,sweetman.Whywoul d
anyonewanthi m dead?
Ishruggedmyshoul der s,dadwasn' tasi nnocentasmom t houghtbuthewasn' takill
ereit
her.
Hewasj ustamanhust l
ingf orhisf amily.
Me:Mandl awi l
ltakeyouhomesoyoucangetsomer est
.
Shenodded.
Me:Mandl a. ..
Him:Sur e.
Wegotupandhel pedmom up, Iopenedt hepassengersi def orher .Shegoti nthencl
osed,
Mandl alookedatme.
Him:Wi llyoubef ine?
Me:Yeah, Ijusthavet ogohomet ocheckonmywi fe.
Him:Youhaven' tspokent oher ?( Ishookmyhead)Soyoudon' tknowhowshei s?
Me:Ihadal otonmymi nd, Phumzawast heleastofmywor ri
es.ButI 'l
lgohomeassoonas
thesepeopl ear rive.
Him:Icanpassbyt heapar t
mentt ocheck.
Me:Noj ustt akemom home, makesur esheget ssleep.
Henodded.
Him:WhataboutZet huandOl wet hu?
Me:Don' ttel lthem, I'lldoi taf t
erseei ngmywi f e.
Henodded.
Me:Thanks, Ioweyou.
Him:Webr ot hersar en' twe?
Ifakedasmi leandt ookoutmyphone.
Him:I '
ll seeyoul at er .
Inoddedanddi al l
edPhumza, shedi dn'tpickup.Idr oppedi tandt r
iedagai n,samet hing.She
pickeduponmyt hi rdt ry.
Her:Qhawe?
Hervoi cewasl azy.
Me:Heywer eyousl eepi ng?
Her:Yeahwher ear eyou?
Me:Onmyway, i
st hedoorl ocked?
Her:Yeah.
Me:OkayI 'llcal lyout ot el
lyout oopen.
Her:Okaybabe.
Me:Il oveyou.
Her:Il oveyout oo.
Me:Okayndi yeza.
Idroppedt hecal l.ThankGodnot hinghappenedt oher !Igotinthecarandwai ted.These
peopl egother eaf terahourndi li
ndi l
e, t
heyapol ogi zedf orbeingl ate.Iwasn' ti
nt hemoodt o
arguesowhat ever !Theyt ookhi m awaysoIdr ovet otheapar tment .
.
IcalledPhumiwhenIwasst andi ngnextt ot hedoor ,sheopenedaf ter30seconds.
Her:Wher ear eyoucomi ngf rom?
Ijustpul l
edherf orat ightsqueeze.
Her:What '
sgoi ngon?
Me:Il oveyou.
Her:Yandi sai st hisbl ood?
Shepushedmeawayf rom her .
Her:Yandi sa!
Iclosedt hedoorandl ocked.
Her:Tal ktome!What 'sgoi ngon?Whosebl oodi st hat?
Me:Babe. ..
Her:Tal ktome!
Me:Yesi tsbl oodbuti tsnotmi ne,its..
.
Shef ellf l
atont hef looronherback.Hai bo!Kant iwhat '
sgoingoni nmyl ifetoday?Irushed
overt oher .
Me:Babe, Phumza? !
Ifeltherpul se, i
twasbeat ing.Okay!Okayshewasst i
llali
ve,Igotupandopenedt hedoorthen
scoopedheri ntomyar ms.Icar r
iedherdownst airst omycar ,Iputheri nt hefrontpassenger
seat.Thebackhadbl ood.Iwentt ogeti nthedr iver '
ssideandst artedtheengi ne.Idrovetothe
hospi t
alasf astasIcoul d.I nl esst hen3mi nuteswewer eatthehospi talandshewast akento
anemer gencyr oom, pr omi singt osaveher .Itoldt henur seabouthercondi t
ionandshe
promi sedt ot ellthedoct orabouti t
.Isi ghedoutl oudlyandhel dmyhead.Howcoul done
personhavesomuchbadl uck?Howwast hispossi ble?WhatwasIgoi ngt odoi fIl
ostheror
ourbaby?Iam cur sed!Iam cur sed!Ever ythingwasgoi ngsowr ongi nmyl i
feandIdi dn'
tknow
whot ot urnt o, atl easti fdadwasst i
llali
veIwoul dseekcomf ortf r
om hi m.
"Sir
, willyoupl easesi gnt hisf orme"
Me:What 'st his?
Her:Admi ssionf or ms.
Inoddedandsatdownt osi gnt hef or ms.

30
Yandisa:
..
..
Peoplewer el
ooki
ngatmeast houghtherewassomet hi
ngwr ongwit
hme, asi
ftherewas
somet hi
ngoffaboutme,theywer
egivi
ngmest r
angelooks.Il
ookedatmyself
,Isti
llhadblood.
Wherewasmymi ndatt
onight
?Iwenttothebathroom,Iwashedmyhandsandf ace, t
ookof f
thet-
shirtIwasweari
ng.Ihadablackvestunderneat
h,Iwipedmyfacethenwalkedout .Iwent
toputt het -shi rtint hecart henwentbacki nside, Isatont hewai tingchai rs.
.
About10mi nut esl at eradoct orwal kedoutoft heemer gencyr oom, Igotupandmethi m
hal fway.
Me:Howi sshe?
Him:Shei sawakeandbei ngt akent oanot herr oom.
Me:ThankGod!Sowhatcausedt hebl ackout ?
Him:Herbl oodpr essur ewast oohi gh, onesi sterNol ut handot oldmet hatshei spregnantsoI
thinkt hat'swhyi tssohi gh.
Inodded.
Me:I st hebabyokay?
Him:Ir efer redhert oagynaecol ogi stf oranul t
rasoundandal lthi ngsr elatedt opregnancy.The
testsaysshei sst i
llpr egnantt hough.( Ibreat hedoutl oudl yasasi gnofr elief)Youcangosee
thedoct orwi t
hher .
Me:Wher ei sshe?
Him:Anur se. ..
.oht her eshei s.
Me:Thankyou.
Iwal kedovert omywi f e,shewasi nawheel chai r.
Me:Heybabe, howar eyouf eel ing?
Her :Abi tdi zzy, myheadhur t
s.
Me:Youf aint ed.
Her :Ouch.
Ismi led, Iwasgl adt oseeherawakeandt alking.Thenur segavemeherf i
let henpushedher .I
followedaf tert hem t ot hedoct or 'sof fi
ce.Whenwegott her eIpr esent edt hef il
ewhi l
ethenur se
expl ainedwhatt hedoct ort oldher .
Dr: Okay, I'lltakei tf rom her e.Thankyousi ster,youcanwai tout side.
Shenoddedandwal kedout .
Dr: Takeasi t(Isatdown)mynamei sDrNhl apho, agynaecol ogi st,awomen' sdoct or.Iam
goodatwhatIdosoyourwi fei si ngoodhands.( Ismi led)Iseeher ei tsaysshei spregnant.
Me:Yes, shei s2mont hspr egnantr ightbabe?
Shenodded.
Dr: Hassheeverwentf orcheckups, sorr
yma' am Ishoul dbeaski ngyou.
Her :NoIhaveneverwentf orcheckups.
Dr: Sot hisi syourf irst?
Shenodded.
Dr: Whydi dyouwai tf orsol ongt hough?( sheshr ugged)I tsi mpor tantf oryout ogof orcheck
upswhenyouar ei nt hi sst at esot hatt hedoct orcanr unsomet est st ocheckyourheal thand
gui deyouast owhatt oeatandwhatt odoatt hisst ageoft hepr egnancy.( wenodded)I ts
i
mpor tantf oryout oknowwhat 'sgoi ngonwi thyourbodyandpr egnancysodon' ttakecheck
upsl ight l
y, ar eyouf itenought ost andup?( shenodded)t hi swontt akel ong.Youwi l
lgetonthe
bedf ormeandl i
ftupyourt oppl ease.Li eonyourbackpl ease, Ijustwantt ocheckt here
condi ti
onoft hebabysot hatIknowwhatIam wor ki ngwi thher .
Shedi dasshewast ol d.
Dr: Si rifyoucanpl easej oinusoverher e,ungat hi sikuval elengaphandl ewhenwel ookingatthe
juicyst uff.Iam sur eyouwoul dl i
ket omeetyourbabyf ort hef irsttime.
Ilaughedandgotup.Iwentt ost andnextt oPhumza, Itookherhandandki ssedi t
Dr: Thi si sgoi ngt obeal i
ttlecol dsodon' tfreakout .
Phuminodded, thedoct ordi dwhat evershehadt odot henl ookedatt hescr eenormoni tor
.We
l
ookedt her et oo, Idi dn' tknowwhatwaswhat .Itwasj ustsodamnconf usi ng.
Dr: OhmyGod!Ohmy. ..
Me:What 'sgoi ngon?
Phumi :Issomet hingwr ongwi thourbaby?
Dr: No, not her eisnot hingwr ongwi thyourbaby.Wai tami nute, whatdowehaveher e?
Shet ur nedont hesoundandwehear dsomet hingl ikeahear tbeat ,i
twasf astandl oud.Ididn't
knowwhet heri twasagoodt hi ngornotbuti tmademeal ittl
eemot ional ,hear ingmysonor
daught er'
shear tbeatwasj ustpr icel ess.
Me:I si tsupposedt obet hatl oudandf ast ?
Dr: Theonl yr easoni tsl oudandf asti sbecauset her ear emanyoft hem.
Me:Li ket wi ns?
Dr: Mor el ikesi x,pl easel ookatt hescr eenf orme.
Phumi :Si x? !Whatdoyoumeansi x?
Iwasshockedmysel f, coul dahumanbei ngcar rysi xlivesi nher ?Shewasn' tanani malkal oku,
wher ewasshegoi ngt ogetal lthest r engt ht ocar ryt hem?Howwast hatevenpossi ble?
Dr: Yessi x, meani ngyouhavi ngsext upl ets.
Me:No?
Dr: Yes, ther ei st hef irstone, thesecond, thi rd,four t
h, fif
thandnumbersi x.
Shepoi nt edt ot hingst hatIcoul dn'tseepr oper lybutt hef actt hatshesai dt heywer emybabi es
madet hem beaut ifulandt hemomentbeaut ifulbutmyner vesal soki ckedi n, whatdi dIknow
aboutf ather hoodnamna?Si xwasscar y, coul dshecar r
ysi xlivesi nherf orni nemont hs?She
wasgoi ngt odi ekal ok, shewasgoi ngt obef at.Ohmygoshshewasgoi ngt obehuge, Icoul d
i
magi nehert ummyal readyandi twasscar y.
"Yandi sa" ,Il ookedather .
Her :Di dyouheart hat ?
Me:Sor r ywhatdi dyousay?
Dr: Wedoneher e, pleasecomesi tdownsot hatIcanexpl ainaf ewt hingst oyou.Iam sur eyou
mi ghthavequest i
onsr egar di ngt hepr egnancy.
Inoddedandhel pedPhumiup, DrNhl aphogaveherawi pert owi pehert ummyt henwesat
down.
Me:Yousai dwehavi ng6t wins?
Shesmi ledandgaveusapi ct ure.
Dr: Thecor rectt er mi ssext upl ets, 6babi esbor natt hesamet i
me.
Me:Howi st hatpossi bl e?Howdi di thappen?
Dr: Itsaver yr arecasebuti tispossi bl e.Hi ghor dermul t
ipl epr egnanci esar enotcompl etely
unknownbuti tismost lylabel l
edashi ghr iskpr egnancy.However ,somet i
mes, thebabi esare
saf elydel iver edandt heyhavegoodchancesofsur vival.
Me:Whatar eyousayi ngexact l
y?
Shegaveuspamphl et s.
Dr: Idon' tmeant oscar eyoubuti tisaver ychal lengi ngpr egnancy, wi thhi ghr isks.Thesewi ll
giveyoual lthei nf ormat i
onr egar dingt hist ypeofpr egnancysopl easer eadt hesepamphl ets
whenyouar eathome.
Wenodded.
Me:Butcanyoubr i
ef lyexpl aint hist ousbecauser i
ghtnowwear el ost,howdi di thappen, can
shecar ryt hem?Whyi si tchal l
engi ng?Whatar et her isks?
Shesmi led.
Dr: Of cos.Mul tiplepr egnanci esoccurwhent heut erusnur turesmor et hanonef etus.Ther ear e
threesubt ypesofmul t
iplepr egnanci es;monozygot ict hisi swhenonezygot e( egg) ,splitsinto
twoormor eembr yos.Monozygot icpr egnancygi vesbi rtht oident i
calt wins, oft hesamesex, as
alltheembr yosar ecar ryingt hesamegenet icmat erialfrom onesi nglezygot e.Theset winsar e
bestknownasmat ernal twins.Di zygot i
ct hi si swhenmor et hanoneovum i sr eleaseddur i
ng
themenst rualcycl e, andeachoneoft hem ar et henf erti
li
zedbymor et hanonesper m, i
tgives
birtht odi zygot ict wines.Theset winsar egenet i
cal l
ydi fferentf rom oneanot her ,andcanal so
havedi ffer entsex;t heyar eal socal ledf rat er naltwi ns.Pol yzygot ic,int hi
scaset herei sa
combi nat i
onofmonozygot i
canddi zygot ict wi ns.Iti saver yrar epr ocess.Mostmul t
iple
pregnanci esar ear esul tofpol yzygot icphenomenon.
IlookedatPhumi ,shewaspayi ngcar ef ul at tentiont owhatt hedoct orwassayi ng.Andmnaon
theot herhand, Icoul dn' thearanyt hingt hel adywassayi ngshame.Mymi ndwasj ustal lover
thepl ace.
Phumza:Sohowcanwet ellourt ypeofpr egnancy?
Dr: Thi scanbeseenonl ywhent heyhavef ul lydevel opedt ot ellthesexbutwecanal sof i
ndout
throughr unni ngt est s.
Me:Sowhatar et her i
skes?
Dr: Ifyouar epr egnantwi thmor et hanonebaby, you’ remor el i
kel ytodevel opapr oblem t hat
causesyourbl oodpr essur et ogett oohi ghwhi chexpl ainswhyyourbl oodpr essur ei shi gh.It
canal sobedanger ousbutt her ear emedi cationst hatmi ghthel pt omai nt ai
ni t,livingast r
ess
fr
eel ifeandheal thyeat ingcanal sohel pt omai nyourbl oodpr essur e.Shej ustcan' taf fordt o
best ressedoranyshocki ngnews, itwi llbeput tingherl ifei ndanger .Itisadvi sabl et hatyou
payver ycar ef ulat tent i
ont oyourbl oodpr essur e, ifitst oohi ghseeadoct orimmedi ately.(we
nodded)Anot hert hingi st hatyouwi l
lbeatr iskofdel iver i
ngyourbabi est ooear ly,maki ngt hem
premat ure.Whenbabi esar ebor nt ooear ly,theiror ganshaven’ thadachancet of ullyf orm.Thi s
cancauseser iousl ung, brai n, hear t, andeyepr obl ems.Butwehaveaneonat alintensi vecar e
unitt ohel ppr emat urebabi esr ecoverandt herear esomecaseswher ebabi esar ebor n
premat urelybutar eheal thyandar ef ul lydevel oped.
Phumza:I sn'tt her esomet hi ngyoucandot okeept hem i nmybodyf orl ongert i
lltheyar efully
devel oped?
Dr: Iftheyi nyourbodyf orl ongeryoumi ghtf aceser iouscompl i
cat ions.Asbabi esgr owt he
spacei nyourst omachbecomessmal lerandi nyourcaset heremi ghtnotbeenoughspacef or
alloft hem t ogr ow, yourbodymi ghtbecomet oosmal lf ort hem l eadi ngt ocr owdi ng.Soyou
mi ghtsuf ferami scar r i
ageormi scar riages.Thi smeanst hatyoumayl oseoneormor eofyour
babi es.I fyouar epl anni ngonkeepi ngt hispr egnancyt henyouwi llhavet ost i
ckt oast rictdiet.
Stickt ol ivingast ressf reel i
fe, exer ci sing, eat i
ngheal thy, andyouwi llhavet oputonatl east50
kgt ohel pyoucar r
yt hem i nt hist inybody.
Me:Whatdoyoumeani fwe, ar eyousuggest ingt hatweabor t
?
Dr: Nosi rIwoul dneversuggestsuch.
Me:Hayibesendi xaki we, bendi xakwenyani .
Phumil ookedatmeandshookherhead, IknewIhadt ocomposemysel f.
Phumi :50kg?HowcanIdot hat ?
Dr: Ormor e, itsimpor tantf oryout ogai nwei ghtt opr ot ectyouandyourbabi es.Butnott owor r
y,
yourappet it
ewi llbever yhugesoyouwonthaveanypr oblem wi thgai ningwei ght .
Wenodded.
Me:Okaysoi fwedon' tfol l
owt hese" rules"Imi ghtl osemywi feandbabi es?
Dr: LikeIsai dt hisi shi ghr iskpr egnancysoi t'simpor tantf oryout of ollowmyi nstruct ionsver y
wel landt obeat t ent i
ve, payat tentiont oyourbodyandbl oodpr essur e.Nost ressf oryouand
noheavyhousechor es, getal otofr est .Iwi l
ldr awupal ivingpl anf oryou, tohel pyou.
Shel ookedatme, Icoul dt ellbyherexpr essi ont hatshedi dn'tliket hi satal l.
Me:Howear lycanweexpectt hem t obebor n?
Dr: 6t o7mont hsear l
y.Butl ikeIsai dpr emat urebabi escanbeheal thyandf ullydevel opedand
i
ft heyar enot ,wehavespeci alcar euni tst ohel pt hem r ecoverandl iveanor malandheal thy
l
ife.
Me:Sot her ei sapossi bilityt hatt heymi ghtbef ullydevel opedandnotf ullydevel oped?
Shenodded.
Dr: Anot hert hi ngIwi llhavet oseeyouever yweekf orcheckupssot hatwecanmoni toryour
pregnancycl osel yandcar efully.
Me:I '
llmakesur et hatshecomesi never yweek.
Dr: Iam soexci t
ed, thisi sbeaut i
ful .Ihavenevergot t enachancet owor konsuchabeaut iful
pregnancy, I
'llmakesur et hatIhel pyoui never ywaypossi bl e.
Us:Wewi shwecoul dbeasexci tedasyouar e.
Phumza:I tsscar y, justt hinki ngaboutal lthesenegat ivesmakesmyhear tver yheavy.
Dr: Heyt her ei snoneedt obescar ed, youj usthavet obecar eful.Iwi l
lbeher ef oryou
wheneveryouneedme, repor tever yt hi ngt omenomat terhowst upidyout hinki tis.Sot hatwe
canat tendt oi tandavoi danyf ur thercompl ications.
Me:Icanhearyout alki ngaboutt hebabi esbutwhataboutmywi fe?Wontt hi scauseherany
compl icat ions?
Dr: Tobehonestwi thyou, thisi sar i
skypr egnancyf orherespeci allywi tht hebl oodpr essur e
beingt ohi gh.Wej usthavet okeepacl oseeyeoni tandmai ntai nit ,nost ressf orherpl ease.
Me:Soi fitescal atesImi ghtl osemywi fe?
Dr: Alloft hati supt oGod.Butmyadvi cei stobecar ef ulandpl ayi tsaf ebutdon' tf orgett o
enjoyyourpr egnancy.Theot hert hingi st hatyoucannotoptf ornor maldel iver yinyourt ypeof
pregnancy.I tcanbever ypai nfulandunbear abl e, i
nvol vi ngal otofl i
f erisks.Soyoucanonl y
givebi rt
ht hr oughacaesar eanoper ationandi thast obedonei ntimeot her wiset herewi llbe
seriouscompl i
cat i
ons.
Phumza:Thi si salott ot akei n, it
sal otQhawe.
Itookherhandandki ssedi t
.
Me:Iknowbabebutwecandoi t,toget herwecandoi t.
Phumza:Idon' tknowi fIwantt ogot hr oughal loft hat,it
sal ot.Itstoomuch.I tst oomuchofa
responsi bilit
y, whati fIcan' tcar rytheseki ds?
Me:Myl ove( Ikissedhercheekt henwi pedhert ears)Younotal oneandyoucandoi tbabe.
Phumza:I tseasyf oryout osayt hatbecauseyoudon' thavet owat challt heset hingsandcar ry
them.
Me:St handwasam. ..
Phumza:NoYandi sa, no.
Me:Okaywhatdoyouwantust odo?
Phumza:Idon' tknow.
Inoddedandl ookedatt hedoct or.
Me:Whatar eouropt ions?
Dr:Abor t
ion.
Me:Doyouwantust o?
Sheshookherhead.
Me:Thewhatdoyouwantust odo?
Sheshr ugged.
Me:Hai yikei fyounotgoi ngt ot alkt henI 'l
l maket hedeci siononyourbehal f,wenotabor ti
ng.
Wewi lltakeourchances.YesIhear dever ythingt hedoct orsai dbutwhati ftheyst rong?Whati f
youcandoi t?BabeI 'llbebyyoursi deever yst epoft heway, wewi l
lenjoyt hispr egnancy.I twil
l
besuccessf ul .
Shenodded.
Dr:Iti slikeever yotherpr egnancy, younotsur ewhat '
sgoi ngt ohappen.Whet heri twillbe
successf ulornotbutwecandosomet hi
ngt omakesur ethati tissuccessf ul.Iwi lldrawupa
eatingdi etf oryouandaskyout opl easest ickt oit.
Phumza:Whataboutmycr avings?
Dr:Cr avi ngsar ethewor stbutIam sur ewecanwor karoundt hem.
Me:Seebabewecandot hist oget herandwehavemom t osuppor tus, sheknowsal otabout
pregnancy.AndwehaveDrNhl apho, shepr omi sest obet her einever ywaypossi ble.
Dr:Ido, ifyouneedanyt hi ngIam her e.Ihavewor kedonhi ghr i
skpr egnancyandIhave
managedt ohel pbotht hemot herandbaby.
Shenodded.
Dr:OkayIwi l
lkeepyouher etoni ghtsoIcanmoni toryoual lnight.Butt omor r
owyoucango
home.
Me:Okayt hanksdoct or.
Shenoddedandcal ledt henur sebacki n.Shet ookPhumzat oherr oom.
.
Wewer einherr oom t alkingaboutt hepr egnancy, wewer emor escar edt hanhappy.Ther ewas
justal ott oconsi derapha, alott obecar ef ulof .Wewer eact uallygambl i
ngher e, withherl ife
andt hebabi es.Wehaveneverhadki dsbutwewer eblessedwi th6, 6?Itwasj ustunbel i
evably
scar y.
Her:Babe. ..
Me:Myl ove.
Her:Youdi dn'tt el
lmewhosebl oodt hatwas.
Iscr atchedmyheadnotknowi ngi ft hiswast her i
ghtt imet ot ellherorwhat .Kal okushei st he
sameper sont hatfaint edwhenshesawt hebl oodbutt henagai ni fshewast ohavear eacti
on
thent hedoct or sareher et ohel p.
Her:Yandi sa.
Me:Babe?
Her:Thebl oodyouhad, ngelabani ?
Me:I tsdad' sbl ood.Hegotshott oday. ..
Her:Wher eishenow?I sheokay?
Me:He. .
.hedi dn'tmakei t.
Her:Whatdoyoumeanhedi dn'tmakei tYandi sa? !
Me:Hei sgonePhumzaokay?
Tearsf ellfrom hereyesi mmedi ately.
Her:No?Nowhathappened?
Me:Phumibabepl easecal m downokay?Pl ease.Thi si sn'tgoodf oryouandt hebabiesplease
babe.
Her:How?Why?Howi smama?Howar eyou?Zet hu?Ol wethu?
Ismiled, Phumzawasj ustonegoodhear t
edper son.Shewasi nhospi talandi ntearsbutshe
waswor ryingaboutsomeoneel se, Ifoundi tcute.
Me:Iam okayasyoucansee, grateful t
hatnot hinghappenedt oyou.Ij ustrecei
vedt hebest
news, wehavi ngt wi ns,sextupletswhat evertheyar ecal led.
Her:Ar eyour eall
y?
Me:Look, Godt ookdadbutbl esseduswi thadozen.Soever ythi
nghappensf orar eason,Ij
ust
havet obest r
ong.( Ilookedup)Hewoul dbesopr oudt houghbut .
..
Her:Hey, Qhaweamani sal l
owedt obeweak.Youar eal lowedt ocr y,youar eallowedtogr i
eve.
Me:Ican' t
, mom needsme.Youneedme, mysi blingsneedme.
Her:Your ightmom doesneedyouandsodoyoursi bli
ngsbutyoual soneedsomeone.And
thatsomeonei sme, l
etmebest rongf oryou.( Inodded)Gohome, haveabat handgetsl eep.
You'l
lfeelbet terint hemor ning.
Me:You' l
lbeokay?
Her:I'
llbeokaybabe, gogetr est
.
Me:Iloveyou.
Her:Iloveyout oo.
Ipeckedhel i
pst henIgotupandwal kedoutofherwar d.Isi ghedoutl oudlyandwal kedoutt o
mycar ,Igotinandcl osedt henst artedt heengi ne.Icheckedmymi rr
orst hendroveoutandt o
theapar tment .
.
WhenIgott hereIpar kedt henwentupt omyr oom, Ijustwal kedinsi ncei twasopened.Idi dn't
havet i
met olockwhenIhadt or ushPhumzat ot hehospi tal
,Iclosedt henl ockedandwentt o
thebedr oom.It hrewmysel font hebedandcl osedmyeyes, whatani ght.

31
Yandisa:
WhenIwokeupt hef ollowingmor ni
ngIt ookabucket , pouredsoapandwat erthenwent
downst airstomycar .Iunl ockeditandopenedal lt
hedoor s,theseatswer el eathersoIcoul d
washt hebl oodof f.Idippedacl othinwat erandst artedwi pingtheseat s.Af terdoi ngsoIr ol
led
downt hewi ndowsandwentbackupst airstomyapar tment,Iwentst r
aightt othebat hr
oom,
undressedt hengotundert heshower .
Aftershower ingIgotoutt odr ymybodyt henr emovedmybandage, Idon' tgetwhyIhavet o
weart hi
st hingwhenIhaveheal ed.Ithrewi tint hebi nt henwentt othebedr oom t ol oti
onand
getdressed.Af t
erdoingsoIpackedPhumza' sbagt henIwentt ototheki tchen, Igrabbedan
appleandmademywayoutandt ot hehospi tal.Startingatt hecarwasht ogetmycarcl eaned
up.Whi letheboyswashedmycarIdeci dedt ocal l
edmyuncl estoinformt hem ofdad' s
passing, t
heywer eshockedt oheart hatbutt heypr omi sedtoi nf
ormt her estoft hef amily.After
thatIcalledmybosst ol ethim knowt hatIwasgoi ngt obeawayf oranot her10days, he
understood.
Luyolo:Wedoneboet .
Me:Shoboy.
Igavehi m aR100not et hengoti nthecar ,i
tlookedandsmel tcl
ean.Idr ovet ot hehospi talfor
mywi fe.
.
WhenIgott her eIparkedt hengotof ftakingherbagwi thme.Ist art
edatt her ecept i
ont hen
wentt oherr oom, Iwal kedi nonhert alkingtoherdoct oraboutherdi etandl ivingpl an.Ismi l
ed
andgr eeted, t
heygr eetedback.
Dr:Youhavecomet ot akeheraway?
Me:Of cosIneedmywi febymysi de.
Shesmi ledasIbabyki ssedher .
Me:Howar eyoudoi ngmyl ove?
Her:Bettert hanyest er day, youl ooki ngbet ternawe.
Me:ButIf eell i
keshi t.Issher eadyt ogohome?
Dr:Yesshei s, herbl oodpr essur ei snor mal now.( Inodded)l etsgiveherspacet ochange.
Inoddedandki ssedPhumza' sf or eheadt henwal kedoutwi thDrNhl apho.
Dr:Imadeheral ivi
ngandeat ingpl anpl easemakesur et hatshest i
ckst oeat.(Inodded)I
scheduledheranappoi ntmentf ornextweekFr idaysopl easemakesur eshecomesi n.
Me:You' llhavet or eschedul e,wewi llbeoutoft own.Wehaveaf uner altoattendbackathome.
Dr:OkayIguesst hef ollowi ngweekt henandpl easemakesur ethatshedoesn' tdoanyheavy
housechor es.
Me:Thet hingi sIdon' tknowwhenwewi l
lbebacki nt ownbutI 'l
lcal ltomakeanappoi nt
ment
withyouassoonaswegetback.
Dr:Nopr obl em, thisismycar dbutIhavebot hyourcont actdet ailssoIwi l
lgiveyouacal l
i
ncaseyouf or get.
Me:Thatwoul dbehi ghl yappr eci at edt hankyou.
Dr:Itsonlyapl easur e,Iam sur eshei sdonenowsogogetyourwi fet hencomesi gnher
dischargef or msandyouf reet ot akeherhome.
Me:Okayt hanks.
Iopenedt hedoor .
Dr:MrDl ami ni .
Me:Yes?
Dr:Iam sor ryf oryourl ose.
Me:Thanksdoc, letmegether .
ShenoddedsoIwal kedi n.
Me:Youdone?
Her:Yeah.
Me:Thenl et sgetoutofher e,wegoi ngt omom' shouse.
Shenodded.It ookherbagt henhandandwewal kedout .Wewentt ot herecept i
onandsi gned
herdischar gef ormst henwewal kedoutt oourcar .Idr oveushome.
.
Whenwegotatmom' st her ewasapol i
cevanpar kedout side,coul dn'ttheyletusgr i
eve?I
droveinandpar kedont hedr ivewayt hengotof f.Wewal kedi nke.
Me:Mol weni .
Mom gotupandwal kedt owar dsuswi thoutsayi ngawor d, sheslappedme.Li keWTF? !What
wast hatf or ?!
Mom:Unj ani njeyenaYandi sa? !
Me:Mama?
Mom:Sut himamaman!Yourf at herpassedawayl astni ghtbutuf i
kangoku?Whatki ndofson
areyou? !Wena? !Yousayyouar eourdaught erinl awbutyoucoul dn' tevencal ltocheckupon
us?Yoursi st er s?Whatt ypeofchi l
dr enar eyou? !Er h? !
Me:MamauPhumzawasi nhospi t alshej ustgotdi schar gednow.
Mom:Why?I sever ythingokay?
Phumza:Ewemadon' twor ryaboutme, howar eyou?
Shesni ff
ed, hehumama!
Mom:Imi sshi m baby, Istillcan' tbel ievehei sgone.
Phumza:I '
m sor rymama, pleasesi tdown.I 'l
lmakeyout ea.
Shenoddedandwentt osi tdown, Phumzawentt ot hekit chen.Ithr ewPhumza' sbagont he
couch.
Me:Det ect ivescanwet alkout side?
Mal eoffi
cer :Nopr oblem, wehaveaf ewquest ionsr egardi ngyourf ather'
sdeat hanyway.
Hesai dget tingup, wewentout side.
Me:Can' tyouseewear emour ningourf ather'sdeat h?Can' tyouseet hatwest illi
nshock?
Can'tyouseet hatwomani sgr ievi ngherhusband?Haveyounocompassi on?
Femal eof ficer :Wesor ryf oryourl osebutwej ustdoi ngourj ob.
Me:Yourj ob?Haveyoucaughtt hepeopl ewhodi dthistomyf ather?
Him:Notyet , that 'swhywehaveaf ewquest ionsf oryou.
Her:Tohel pusf indyourf at her '
skill
er.
Inodded.
Him:Didyourf atherhaveanyr ivals?Enemi es?Someonewhowoul dwanthi m dead?
Me:Idon'tknow.
Him:Hewasyourf at herr ight ?Howcomeyoudon' tknow?Fat hersconf ideinthei
rfirstbor
n
sonsever ytime.
Me:Wel lnotmyf at her.
Him:Mmm. ..Yourmot hersaysyourf at herwasabusi nessman, whatt ypeofbusinessdi dhe
own?
Me:Abar / taver n.Idon' tknowexact ly.
Him:Whatt ypeofbar ?
Me:Whydoesi tsoundl ikemyf atheri st heonebei nginvest i
gatedher e?
Him:Thesear ej ustquest ionst hatwi l
lhel pusknowwhohi senemi eswer e.
Her:Whenwehavel ocat edhi senemi esi twi llbeeasyt ofindhi skil
ler.
Me:Hesol dal cohol .
Him:Anyt hingel se?
Me:Likewhat ?
Him:Iwasj ustaski ng.
Me:Iwoul dn' tknowbecauseIneversetf oott ohi splace.
Him:Hmm st range.
Me:Whati ssost rangeabouti t
?
Him:Ashi sonl ysononewoul dexpecthi mt ot eachyouever ythingabouthi sbusinessfor
ti
mesl i
ket hese.
Me:Ther ei sal otyoudon' tknowaboutmyf atherandme.
Him:Pleaseenl i
ght enus.
He:Yousai daf ewquest ions.
Hesmi l
ed.
Him:Canwet alkt ohi sst af fmaybet heymi ghtknowsomet hingyoudon' tknow.
Me:Knockyour selvesout .
Igavethem t henameoft hebarandaddr ess.
Me:Wi l
lthatbeal l
?Becausewehaveaf uner altoar range.
Him:Yourmot hert ellsust hathi sbodywi lltot ransportedt otheEast ernCape.
Me:Yest hat 'swher ehi sbur ialwi l
lbe, athome.
Him:Ourpeopl ewi llbedonewi thhisbodybyt omor row.
Me:Whogaveyouper mi ssi ont oexami nehi sbody?
Him:Yourmot herdi d.
Me:Okayi fthat '
sal l..
.
Ipoint
edt ot hegat e.
Him:Wewi l
ll eaveyout oi tt hen.
Me:Thankyou.
Him:Agai nsor ryf oryourl ose.
Me:Okay, f
illusi nonyourf indi ngs.
Him:Wewi l
l.
Me:Thankyou.
Theysmi ledandwal kedaway.Mxm It ookoutmyphoneanddi all
edMandl a,hetookt hecal
l
al
mosti mmedi atel y.
Mandla:Iam i nami ddl eofapr esentat ion.
Me:Alri
ght , getbackt ome.
Him:Sho.
Hehungup, ohwel l!Iwenti nsi de.
Me:BaphioOl wet hu?
Mom:Phumzai swi tht hem i noneoft her ooms, didyoucal lyouruncl es?
Isatdownnextt oherandt ol dherever ythingaboutt hechatwi t
htheuncl es.
.
.
Phumza:
InOl wet hu'sr oom. ..
Me:Ihaveneverl ostaf atherbutIhavel ostasi stersoIknowhowi tfeelstoloseal ovedone.
Thef i
rstf ewdayswi thoutt hem ar ethewor stbutkuyadl ulasi st
er szam.Youj usthavet oask
Godf orst rengt handbest rong.
Theynodded.
Zet hu:Thankswet hu.
Ol wethu:Uphiubhut i?Howi she?
Me:I nt hel ounge.Icanseet hathei shur ti
ngbuthei st ryingt obest r
ongf orever yone.
Zet hu:Hewasout si dewi thhi m whenhegotshot .
Me:Kant iwher ethi shappen?( shocked)
Ol wethu:Ri ghtatourdoor step, aphaont hever anda.
Me:Younotser i
ous.
Zet hu:Weswear ,whydoyout hi nkwescar edt ogooutt her e?
Me:OhmyGodIdi dn' tknow.
Zet hu:Itwasscar y, hear i
ngt hosegunshot sandseei ngdadont hef l
oor.Itwasscar yIthought
theywoul dcomeback.
Me:Doyouguyshaveanyi deawhoshothi m?Doyout hinki t
sthesameper sont hatattacked
Yandi sa?Kant iwhoi saf tert hisf ami ly?
Noser iousl ysomet hingwasgoi ngoni nt hi sfami ly,notsol ongagoYandi sawasi nhospi t
al
nowhi sf atheri sdead.Hedi dn' tdi enat ural l
yort henor mal /usualway, hewasshotonhi sdoor
step.Whatdoest hatmeanf ort her estofus?Wear en' tsaf e,wenext .Iam next ,mybabi es...Oh
Lor d!
Ol wethu:Wehavenoi dea, allIknowi st hatIam scar ed.
Me:Don' tyout hi
nki tsl inkedt hough?
Zet hu:Itcoul dbe, thepol icear est i
llwor kingonf indingt heki ll
er.
Me:Whati ftheycomei nandst ar tshoot ingever yone?Wenotsaf e.
Ol wethu:Doyout hi nkt heywoul ddosomet hingliket hat ?
Wel ookedateachot herandshr ugged.
Zet hu:TobehonestIcoul dn' tsleepl astni ght ,Iwasscar ed.Ithoughtt heywoul dcomeback
andf i
nishof fever yone.
Ol wethu:Met oo.
Ibi t
emynai l
sandl ookedatt hewi ndow.
Me:Idon' twantt odi e, Iam t ooyoungt odi e.
Zet hu:Nam hl oIdon' twantt odi e.
"Noonei sgoi ngt odi e" ,hi svoi ceki ndofgavemeaf r
ight .Iwasn' texpectingtoheari t
,Iputmy
handovermychest .Myhear twasr aci ng.
Ol wethu:Younotsur ebut hi .
Hi m:Iguesst her ei snoneedf ormet oaskhowyouguysar ehol dingup, it
spr ettyclearyou
traumat i
zed.
Zet hu:Itwasat r
aumat icexper ience.
Hi m:Iknowbutpl easedon' tst ressmywi fe, wecan' taf fordi t
.
Zet hu:Why?What 'sgoi ngon?
Hi m:Not hing, babendi yabuyaneh?
Me:Uyaphi ?
Hi m:Theuncl esj ustcal ledsoIhaveaf ewt hingst osor tout ,
dad' sbodyhast obeathomeby
tomor rowaf t
er noon.Andmom hast obeont hemat tress.
Me:Wheni st hef uner alkant i?
Hi m:TheSat ur dayaf tert hi sone, thef uner alwillbear rangedt hatsi de.
Me:Oh.
Hi m:Itsj ustt hatgr anandt amkhul uwantt oseet heirson.Andt heywanthi mt obebur i
edby
theirpol i
cysoIhavet oar rangehi st ranspor tandal loft hat.
Ol wethu:Whenar ewel eavi ng?
Hi m:Wedr ivingt her et omor r owmor ning, granddadwant sust her eASAP.
Ol wethu:Notwi t
hdadIhope.
Hesmi ledandshookhi shead.
Zethu:Sowhowi l
ltravel wi thdad' sbody?Howwi l
lthesepeopl eknowwher et otakehi m?
Him:Hehasawi fet hathel efthomewi thsoshehast ogobackhomewi thhi m.
Zethu:Whenar etheyl eavi ngi fwel eavi ngi nt hemor ni ng?
Him:Toni ght ,iyaphut humal endaba.BabeI 'llfetchyouwhenIam donewi thever ything.
Inodded.
Olwet hu:Kant iwontyousl eepher ebhut i?Weneedyou.
Him:I 'llsleepher elittl
esi s,wej ustgoi ngt her et opack.
Shenodded.
Him:Best rongmanguys, mom needsus.Babemom want syout ohel pherwi t
hsomet hing.
Inodded.
Zethu:Wet rying.
Him:Iknowyouar e, Iloveyoune?Ndi yabuya.
Heki ssedourf oreheadsonebyonet henwal kedout .Igotupandwentt othel ounge, mama
want edmet ohel pherpack.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Ihadal ott odobysunsett odaysoIgotont hecaranddr ovet othepol i
cest ationt otellthem to
speedupt hepr ocess, takewhat everevi dencet heywant edf r
om hi sbodybecausehewas
l
eavi ngt ownt oni ght.Whi leIwasst illtal kingt oanof ficermyphoner ingedi nmypocket .
Me:Pl easeexcuseme.
HenoddedsoIt ookoutmyphoneandt ookt hecal l,
wal kingoutoft hepol i
cest ation.
Me:Yes?
Him:I fyoument ionmynamet ot hecopsj ustknowt hatIwontgodownal one.
Me:Ar eyouhavi ngmef ol l
owed?
Him:Justknowt hatIam wat chingyouandIwonthesi tategivingt hem anameandevi dence.
Me:Whatdoyouwantf rom meexact ly?Youki ll
edmyf ather,youbeatmet oapul pandnow
yout hr eat eningme.I sn' titenough?Haven' tyouhadenough?
Him:Thatol dmansawi tcomi ng!Whenhedeci dedt ost ealmybusi nessheknewIwasgoi ng
tocomef orhi m gunsbl azi ng.
Me:Hedi dn'tst eal anyt hingf rom yousoj ustst opl yi
ng.
Him:Thosewer emypeopl e!
Me:Thesamepeopl eyouwer er obbi ng?Sel l
ingt hem f akest uff?Hej ustgaveyoual i
ttl
e
compet ition, compet i
tionyoucoul dn' thandl eandt hat 'swhyyouhadt okillhim.Youaf ucken
cowar ddoyouknowt hatJer ome?
Him:Hest eppedhi sf eetonaver ydanger ousman' st er ri
tory!Ranmest raightt ot heground!
Kill
edmypeopl e!St olemyst uff!Cl aimedmyst reet s.
Me:Al lthisf ordr ugs?Money, peopl e?
Him:Noal loft hisf orr espect ,het houghthecoul ddi sr espectmeandgetawaywi thit
.Nahno
onedi srespect smeandget sawaywi thi t.Noonest eal sf rom me.
Me:Hewasaf ami lymanhust li
ngf orhi sf ami lyt hesamewayyouhust l
ef oryourf amily,you
didn'thavet oki llhim.Butdoyouknowwhat ?Youcanhavei tallback, thest reets, t
hepower ,
yourpeopl ebutj ustst ayawayf rom myf ami ly.
Him:Youwer eal waysasi ssy, acowar d.Shi tyourpant satever ysignoft rouble.
Me:Cal lmewhat everyouwantt ocal lmebutst ayawayf rom meandmyf ami l
y.
Him:Youdi srespect edmydaught er ,mynameandyoubr okeyourpr omi set ome.YouknowI
don'tj ustl etthoseki ndofpeopl egoespeci allyyou, Ilovedandt reatedyoul i
kemyownson.I
evenwentt oj ailforyou, Itookt hef allf oryouandal l youhadt odowaskeept hatsmi l
eonmy
daught er,loveandr espectherbutwhatdi dyoudo?Yout reatedherl iker ubbish,somet hingof
veryl i
ttleval ue.Doyouknowhowmuchi thur ttoseemydaught ercryandevent rytotakeher
l
ifeal lbecauseyoucoul dn' tkeepyourpr omi set oher ?Al lbecauseIcoul dn'tpr otecther
becauseIwasi nt heref oryou?Thesamemanwhohur ther?Madeherf eellessofaper son
shei s.WhenIwentt her ewhatdi dIaskyout odo?
Me:Whydi dn'tyouj ustki llme?Geti toveranddonewi th.
Hel aughed.
Him:ForsomeoneIkeptr eal l
ycl oset omeyououghtt oknowmyst yle,that 'snothowIdo
thi
ngs.Iwantyout of eel ashel plessasIf eltwhenIwasi nt here, Iwantyouandyouri nnocent
l
itt
lewi fetof eelever ypai nf eltbymydaught er.
Me:Youst ayawayf rom mywi f
eokay?
Him:Thepuppyi stryingt obar khuh?
Me:St ayawayf rom her .
Him:Makeme.
Idroppedt hecal l.Thi smanhast ogo.Iwentbacki nsidet osor toutl ent okat atat henwentt o
thepar l
ourt or entt hei rser vices( thei rdr i
ver sandcar ),t
heydi dn'thaveapr obl em wi ththatas
l
ongasIpai dupf r
ont .It ransf erredt hemoneyt ot heiraccounti mmedi at elyandweagr eedon
thetime, 19h00.Af t
ert hatIwentt ogetont hecaranddr ovehome, Ical ledMandl aont heway
askinghi mt omeetmeatmyhouse.
.
Igothomeandpar kedt hengotof f, Mandl awasal r eadywai ti
ngout sidet hegat esoIwal ked
overt ohim.
Me:Myout tie
Him:Shar pmyout tie, howar eyouhol di ngup?
Me:Eyndodakuyal enal ebutkuzohl angana.
Henodded.
Him:Whodoyout hinkdi dt his?
Me:Jer ome.
Him:Becauseoft hebeeft heyhadorj ustbecauseofyou?
Me:Thei rbeefbuthesai dhei scomi ngf ormeandt hevr ou.
Him:Ihat esayi ngIt oldyousobutIdi d, Itoldyounott omesswi ththatgi rl'
sf eeli
ngs.
Me:Idon' tneedyourIt oldyouso.
Him:Okaysor ry, whatwi l
lyoudonow?I st hepl anst il
lon?
Me:NoIwantyout ocancel theguys, Idon' twanti nanymor e.Ihadat alkwi thdadbef orehe
passedonandIr ealisedt hatIam nott hatper son, Iwasn' tcutoutf ort hepat hIwant edtotake.
Wehavedonesowel lf orour selvesboy, youandI .Iam notwi ll
ingt ol oseever ythingover
Jeromebecausei fwegoonwi tht hispl anwewi l
lat tr
actal ltheunnecessar yat tenti
ont ous,
mor eenemi esj ustbecausewewantt ot akeoutoneper son.I tsnotwor thi tbecausewemi ght
endupl i
vingt hisl i
fef oret ernityorevendi eyoung.Ihaveawi feandbabyont heway.Ihavea
mot herandsi bl ingst ot akecar eofIdon' twantt olivemyl ifewat chingovermyshoul der,dad
l
ivedt hatlifewher ei shet oday?Hegotshotr ighther eathi sownhome.
Him:Icanhearyouboyandhei sn' twor thal lthetroubl ebutyouknowJer omewontl etyouof f
thateasily.
Me:That '
swhyIneedyourgun.
Him:Agun?Youcan' tevenuseagun.
Me:Icanl ear n.
Him:Noboy, noyounotgoi ngt ohavemor ebl oodonyourhands.Rememberhowt hat
exper i
encechangedyou?
Me:I twassel fdef ense!Thatguyat t
ackedmygi r
l.YouknowIcan' tbel ieveJer ome, Ikil
ledthat
mant oprot ecthi sdaught erbutt odayhei susi ngi tagai nstme.Thr eat eni ngmeandmyf amil
y,
heevenki l
ledmyf at her .
Him:Soyouwantt ot akehi m out ?
Me:Toni ght .
Him:Wecan' tuseal icensedgunt oki ll,theywi l
ltraceitbackt omeandt hatwi l
lbet heendof
us.
Me:Your ightbutIneedagun.
Him:Theguyst hatIwasor gani si
ngknowsomeonewhocansel lusanont raceabl egun.
Me:Thencal lyourboys.
Him:Ican' tbel ievet hi s,wewer egoi ngt omakebi gmoneyf r
om deal ing.
Me:Jahne?Butf ormei t
snotwor tht her i
sk, wemi ghtgetcaughtandgot oj ail.Idon' twantto
gother eandl eavemywi feal oneapha.
Him:Pl usyouwoul dn' tsur vivei t,yout oomuchofababy.
Me:Iam notababy, cal lyourguy.
Hedi al
ledhi m up, theyspokef oraf ewmi nutesthenhedr oppedit.
Him:Hecanor gani set hem, hewi llcal lmewhenhehast hem.
Me:Younotgoi ngt ohavehi sbl oodonyourhands.
Him:Hayi futsekhemademe.
Me:Sohowdowegethi m?
Him:Chant ell
ewoul ddoanyt hingf oryou.
Me:No.
Him:Youj ustgoi ngt oaskwher eherf at herisandal lofthatshit
.
Me:Thenshewi l
lknowIhadsomet hingt odowi thhi sdeath.
Him:Don' tbest upi d,youhavea" son"t oget hersoyouwantt ogotoherhouset odiscussthat.
Youwantt oknowwhet heryouhaveasonornotr ight?
Me:Yeah.
Him:Andsheknowsyounotcapabl eofki l
li
ng.
Me:Andi fIdon' tshowup?
Him:Youwi l
lshowupaf terget tingt hedeeddone.
Me:Howwi llIlookatherknowi ngIt ookawayherki ng?Youknowhowmuchshel ovesherdad.
Him:Stopbei ngweak, heki ll
edyourf at herandwant stohur tyourwife.I
tshim oryou.
Me:NoIcan' tmf et hu.Ial r eadyhur tt hisgi rl
,Ican'
tdot his.
Him:Yescomeonndodal ifei sgoi ngt obeeasywi thouthim.
Me:Okay.
Him:Coolmandi bal eke, I'
llcal lyou.
Me:Shar pthanksman.
Him:Weboys.
Weshoul derbumpedt henhegotonhi scar ,Iwentbacki nside.
.
Mama:Soi sithappeni ngt oni ght ?
Me:Yeahyoul eavi ngt onight .
Her:Wit hhisbody?
Inodded.
Me:Yousur eyougoi ngt obeokay?
Shenodded.
Me:LetmegogetPhumza.
Her:Okaybaby.
Iki
ssedhercheekt hengotupandwentt ogetPhumi .
.
Later.
..
Idrovemom t ot hepar lour ,assoonast hecarst artedmovi ngIcall
edChant el
le.Shet ookt
he
cal
limmedi ately.
Her:Heyyou.
Me:Heyhowar eyou?
Her:Goodandyour self?
Me:I'm good, youbacki nt ownr i
ght ?
Her:Yeahwhy?
Me:Ineedt oseeyou.
Her:Now?
Me:Isyourdadar ound?
Her:Uhm yeah.
Me:Wi llhebegoi ngout ?Iwast hi nkingofcomi ngt oyourhouse, weneedt otalk.
Her:Nohewi llbehomeal lni ghtsol et smeetsomewher eelse,foryourownsaf ety.
Me:Okaycanyouwemeetnow?Myf avor i
terest
aur antatbroadwal k.
Her:Whatdoyouwantust otalkabout ?
Me:Us, Imissyou.
Her:Imi ssyout oo.
Me:Soyoucomi ng?
Her:Yeah.
Me:Ican' twai ttoseeyou.
Shegiggled, Idroppedt hecal landcal l
edMandl a.Het ookt hecal l.
Him:What 'sthepl an?
Me:Athishouse, now.
Him:AndChant el
le?Yourson?Hi swi fe?
Me:Doyout hinkher eallyexist s?
Him:Idon'tknowboy, Iguesswewi l
lfindoutt onight.
Me:OkayChant ell
ewontbet her e.
Him:Meetmeatmyhouse, wewi lldri
vet heretogether .
Me:Alri
ght .
WehungupandIdr ovet ohi shouse, stoppi ngatmyhouset ocheckont hem.Ever yt
hingwas
normalsoIdr ovet oMandl a'shouse, Ipar kedmycarandwedr ovei nhiscar.Inthecarhegave
memygun, itwasheavyandl oaded.Ihadnevert ouchedaguni nmyl if
e,Ididn'
tevenknow
howt ousei t.Icoul donl yuseakni f
e, i
twaseasy.Butont heot herhand, Mandl anewi tl
ikehe
knewhimsel f.Theyf ascinatedhi m andt hat'
swhyheevengotal i
censeandgun.
.
Whenwegott ohi shousewepar kedandwai t
edint hecar ,Iwasner vous.
Mandla:Soar ewedoi ngt his?
Inodded.
Him:Comeonwewi l
ldoacl eanandqui ckj obj ustli
kehet aughtus.
AgainInoddedandwegotof f.Itookadeepbr eath,hegavemeabal acl
ava.Ilaughedandt ook
i
t.
Him:Ifyoursoni si nthereheshoul dn'tr ecognizeyou.
Me:Thanks.
Henodded, weputt hem ont henwentt ot hedoor .Weknockedont hefrontdoorandwai ted,t
he
doorswungopenandi twashi m.Mandl adi dn'twast eanyt ime, hef i
redathimi mmedi at
ely.
Twicestraightont hehear tar eat henpul ledmeandwej oggedt ot hecar ,wegotinandhe
star
teddriving.Ir emovedt hatdamnt hingandt hrewt hegunont hef l
oor.
Him:Ther eisnowayhei ssur vivi
ngt hat .Didyouseehowhewentdown?Hi sfacialexpressi
on?
Me:Howcanyoubesopr oud?
Him:Howcanyousi tthereandshedat earf orsomewhoki l
ledyourf ather?
Me:Doyout hinkhei sdead?
Him:Heshoul dbenowyoucangomeetyourgi rl
.
Me:Shei snotmygi rl.
Him:Yeahwhat ever!

32
Yandi sa:
Ibumpedi nt
oChant ell
eatthedoor ,shewaswal ki
ngoutofther estaurantwithtear
sinhereyes.
Ipul l
edherbyherar m andshest opped.
Me:I 'mf orbeinglate,mywi fe.
..
Heputupherhandandpul l
edi toutofmygr i
p.
Me:What '
swr ong?
Her :Dadwasshot .
Me:When?How?Bywho?
Her :Rightnow.
Me:Wher eisher i
ghtnow?
Her :Mom i swai t
ingforanambul ancet ot
akehi mtothehospital
,Iam sor rywehavet o
reschedul e.
Me:I 'm comi ngwi t
hyou.
Her :Thanks.
Itookadeepbr eathandf ol
lowedaf terhertothecarpark,
wegoti nourcar sanddroveof ft
o
herhood.Whenwegott oherhouseanambul ancewasalreadypar kedinsidetheyard,Ipark
behi ndhercarandt ookaver ydeepbr eathbeforegett
ingoff.Wewal kedovertowher ethe
"crowd"was, theywer ebusyt r
yingtor evi
vehimi nt
hepoolofhi sownbl ood.
Chant ell
e: Dad!
Ipul l
edhert omeandwr appedmyar msar oundher.
Her :LetmegoYandi sa!Letmego!
Shescr eamed.
Me:Lett hem dot hei rjob.
"Wecal l
ingi t,ti
meofdeat h...",Chant ellescr eamedandsl appedmyhandssoIl etgoofher .She
kneel edi nf rontofhi m andshookhi m, crying" dad!Dadwakeup" .Hermot herbr okedowni nto
tear sont hesi de.Ayoungsl ight l
ydar kboyr ant oChant elleandpul l
edherbyhert op, cr yi
ngt oo.
Coul dthatbemyson?Coul dt hatbe?Ihel dmyheadandwi pedmyf aceast earsescapedmy
eyes, whathaveIdone?WhathaveIdoneLor d?
"Looksl iket hesegangbossesar edyi ngl i
kef li
est hesedays" , hesai dashepushedmeasi de.It
wasapol iceof ficer.Oneguypul ledChant elleawayf rom Jer ome( kickingandscr eami ng)and
suggest edt hatsomeonet ookt hel i
ttleboy, Ihesitat edbef oret aki nghi m.Il i
ftedhi m upand
wipedhi st ear st henl ookedathi m.Mor etear sescapedmyeyesasIsawmyl atef atheri nhim,
meani ngheal sol ookedal otl ikeme.Howdi dImi sst his?Howcoul dInotknowaboutmyown
child?Howcoul dChant elleliet ome?
.
Mi nut esl ater ..
.
Wewer eint heirsi tti
ngr oom, Chant ellei nmyar msandt hel ittl
eboynextt ome.Mr sAdams
wasanswer ingquest i
onst ot hepol i
cer egar di ngtheshoot i
ng, unf ortunatelyandf or tunat elyfor
meshedi dn' tseeanyt hi ng.Tr acki ngdownJer ome' ski llerwasgoi ngt obechal l
engi ngbecause
hehadal otofenemi es, al otofpeopl ewant edhi m deadi ncludi ngme.ButIdi dn'tpul lthe
tri
gger ,Ifroze.
"Thankyouma' am andmycondol encest ot hef ami ly"
Mr sAdams: Iknowmyhusbandwasn' tasai ntbuthedeser vesj ust i
ce.
Of ficer:Wewi l
lt rytot rackdownwhoevert hati sresponsi blema' am.
Shenoddedandwal kedt hem outt hent ookabucketandmop.Shewentt ocl eant hebl ood.
Me:Chant elle..
Shel ookedatme.
Me:Whendi dhehappen?Howol di she?I shemi ne?
Shesatupandshi fted.
Her :Comeher eboy, comet omommy.
Hegotupandwal kedovert ohersi de, shet ookhi m andsathi m onherl ap.Myphoner angi n
mypocket , Itooki toutt ocheckt hecal lerID" Phumza" .Iputi tbacki nmypocket .
Me:Ar eyougoi ngt ot alk?
Her :RememberwhenIwentawayt hesameyearyouaskedmet ohaveanabor tion?
Me:Whenyouhadt ogot akecar eofyoursi ckgr an?Ewe.
Her :RememberIkeptdel ayi ngcomi ngback?( Inodded)Dadt oldmet ostayt her et il
lIgave
birtht ohi m, Icoul dn'tgot hroughanot herabor ti
onYandi sa.Thef irstonewashor ribl
e.
Me:Soyoul iedt ome?Wasyourgr anevensi ck?(sheshookherhead)whenwer eyougoi ngto
tellmet hatIhaveason? !
Her :Youdi dn' twanthi m!Yout oldmet ohaveanabor ti
on!
Me:Butyoudi dn' tChant elleandyoul iedt ome!Di dn' tyout hinkIdeser vedtoknow?
Her :Youal sol i
edt ome!Thever ysameyearyoursonwasbor nyougotengagedt osomeone
elseandyoudi dn' ttellmeabouti t!Sodon' tyoudar esi tt her eandcal lmeal air!
Me:Whatyoudi ddoesn' tcompar et owhatIdi d,youhi demysonf rom me!Whenwer eyou
planni ngont ell
ingmeabouthi m huh? !Iwonderwhatl iesyouhavebeenf eedinghi m aboutme.
DidIdi e?Abandonedhi m?Whatexact l
y?Howdoyouexpl ainhi m nothavi ngaf ather ?Whatdo
yout ellmysonChant elle? !
Ihi tthecouchandt hel ittleboyst artingcr ying.
Her :Youscar i
ngt hechi ld!
Me:Answert hebl oodyquest ions!
Her aisedhi svoi ceaswel l,Chant ellegotupandt riedt ocal m hi m down.
"Heyyou!Don' tyoudar ecomet omyhouseandst ar tshout ing!Youhearme? !",
hermot her
shout edf rom t hedoor .
Hermom:Idon' tknowwhyyouher ewhenyouknowver ywel lthatJer omedi dn'twantyouher e,
Iwantyououtofmyhouse.Now!Andt hatboyi snotyour s,yout oldhismot hert oabor thim so
don' tcomeher et omyhouseandst ar tdemandi nganswer s.
IlookedatChant ellet henathermot her.Igotupandf i
xedmyj acket .
Me:I 'l
l gobutwenaChant elle,youhaveal otofexpl ainingt odo.
Hermom:Shedoesn' thavet oexpl ainher selftoyou!
Me:Shedoes, t
hat '
smysont hatshehasbeenhi di
ngf orcl oset o4year s.Whatwer eyou
thinking?
Her :Pleasej ustgoYandi sa, I'l
lcallyou.
Hermom:Younotcal linganyone!I fyougoi ngt oallowhi mt oplayyouagai nthenyou' llfoll
ow
him, youwi l
lleavemyhouse!
Her :Thi sisst illmyf ather '
shousesoIam notgoi nganywher e!
Hermom:Yourf at heri sgonei ncaseyouf orgotsot hatmakest hi
shousemi ne!Youwi l
lliveby
myr ules, i
fyoucan' tfut sekoutofmyhouse!
Chant el l
ewasaboutt ot alkbackwhenIst oppedher .Jer omewasn' tevengonef orahourbut
theywer eal r
eadyscr atchi ngeachot herandcl aiminghi sweal th.I
fMr sAwasst il
lthehear t
less
bitchshet ur nedi ntowhenMrAwentt oj ailthenChant el l
ewasgoi ngt osleepout si
dewi ththe
kid,andIdi dn'twantt hat .Ipul ledherout sidewi thme.
Me:Shei sst illyourmot hersoyouhavet or especther .
Her :Stepmot her .
Me:Chant el l
eyoudon' twantt osl eepout sider ight?
Shenodded.
Me:Thenr espectherpl ease, foryourson' ssakeatl east.
Agai nshenodded.
Me:I 'l
l callyouwhenIcomebackf rom dad' sf uneral sowecant al
k, Iam sorryforbei ngr ude.I
am sor ryforshout ing, Iknowyoudeal ingwi thal otrightnowandIam sor ryforaddi ngont o
yourst ress.
Her :Yourf atheri sgone?
Me:I thappenedl astni ght , hegotshot .
Her :I'
m sosor ry, Ihadnoi dea.
Me:Don' tbe, focusonyouandt hel i
ttl
eoneokay?( shenodded)You' llbestrongr i
ght ?
Her :Ifyoual sopr omi set obest rong.
Me:Ipr omi se.
Her :Pinkypr omi se?
Ilaughed, ohsomet hi ngsaboutChant ellewi llneverchange.
Me:Wenot18anymor e.
Her :Youmean15and18.
Me:Yeahyeahwhat everbutpi nkypr omi se.
Ihel doutmypi nkyf inger , shehel doutherf i
ngeraswel landwepi nkypr omised.Sheki ssedi t
andIki ssedi ttoo.
Her :Ther ei snogoi ngbacknow.
Me:Yeahgoi nsi debef or ehef reezest odeat h.
Her :Inamedhi m af teryou, Qhawe.
Ismi led.
Me:I tsabeaut i
fulnamebutonl ybecausei tsmi ne.
Her :Yousomodest .
Ichuckl edandki ssedherf or ehead.
Me:I nt roduceussomeot hert i
mebecauser ightnowhecan' tevenl ookatme.
Her :Becauseyoushout edatusbutIunder standyourf rustrati
ons.Gobef oreyourwi f
esendsa
sear chpar ty.
Ichuckl edandt ookoutmyphone.
Me:Best rong.
Her :Yout oo.
Inoddedandaccept edt hecal lasIwal kedt omycar .
Phumza:Yousoi nconsi der ate!
Me:BabyIam comi ng, sor ry.
ShehungupsoIgoti nt hecarandst arteddr iving.
.
Igothomeandpar kedt hengotof f.Iwalkedt ot hedoorandknocked, t
heyopenedi mmedi atel
y.
Zethu:Whatt ypeofper sonar eyoukant iwena? !
Me:Hu- huhdon' tshoutatmepl ease.
Isatdownnextt oPhumzaandki ssedhercheek.
Me:I '
m sor ryIgothel dup.
Phumza:Ar eyouhungr y?
Me:Yeaht hanksmyl ove.
Shegotupandwal kedt ot heki tchen.
Me:Haveyouguyspacked?
Zethu:Hmmm no.
Me:Whatar eyouwai ti
ngf or?Wel eavi ngat5i nthemor ni
ng, youguysar enotser i
ous.
Zethu:Wewi llgopackj ustnow.
Me:Hmmm, Ol Ol ..
Shel ookedatme.
Me:Whyar eyousoqui etsi si?
Olwet hu:Not hing, wer eyouwi thMandl a?
Me:Hmmm yeah, why?
Olwet hu:Not hing.
Me:Yousur e?
Olwet hu:Yeahsur e.
Me:Okay.Iam sor ryf orcomi nghomel at e,Iknowyouguyswer eprobabl yscaredbutser i
ously
noonei sgoi ngt ohur tt hisf ami l
y.
Theynodded.Phumzacamebackf rom t heki tchenwi t
hmyf ood, shegavemeawetswab.I
wipedmyhandst hent ookmypl at eoff ood.
Me:Hu- huhbabewhat 'st his?Am Iar abbi tnowl entoIwi l
leatvegeskuphel a?
Her:Thedoct orsai d...
Me:Hu- huhmyl oveshewast alkingaboutyounotme, whatdi dyouguyseat ?
Olwet hu:Thesamef ood.
Phumza:Iwontgoont hisdi etal one.
Me:BabeIam amanandmeneatmeat ,Idon' tseeanyapha.
Phumza:Wel lt hat '
st hef oodwewi llbeeat ingnow.
Ishookmyheadandst artedeat ing.
Phumza:Iam goi ngt opr epar ef orbed.
Me:Iwi lljoinyoushor tl
y.
Shenoddedanddi sappear edi nt hepassage.
Zethu:Whyi ssheonadi et ?Isever ythi ngokay?
Me:Yeahshej usthasahi ghbl oodpr essur epr oblem, i
tshigh.
Zwet hu:Oht hat '
sbad.
Me:Yeahbutshewi llbef ine.
Zwet hu:Aber ightnyani ,letmegopack.
Me:Fort woweeksne?
Zwet hu:Okaybhut i,Ol wet hu. .
.
Shesnappedoutofi tandgotup, theywentt ot heirroom.If ini shedeat ingandwentt oputt
he
plateint hesi nk.Af tert hatIl ockedal l door st henswi t
chedof ft hel i
ghtsandwentt obed.
.
Phumiwasal readyi nbedsoIundr essedt hengoti nbednextt oher .Iputmyar m overher
waistandcuddl edhert hencl osedmyeyes.
"Idon'tfeel saf eanymor eYandi sa, Iser iousl ydon' t.Uhambaubuyengobusukul eavingmeal l
alone."(youal wayscomi nghomel at e)
Me:Ndi xol i
silenj est handwasam, itwonthappenagai n.(Iapol ogizednj emyl ove)
Phumza:Youal wayssayi ngt hatYandi sabutguesswhatyoudoi tagain, overandoveragai n.I
don'tthinkIwi llbecomi ngbackaf tert hef uner al
.
Me:What ?Why?
Her:I'm pr egnantYandi saandyouhear dwhyt hedoct orsaid, Idon' tthi
nki tsgoodf ormet obe
surroundedbysuchvi olence.I t
sbr ingi ngmest r
essandst ressi snotgoodf orourbabi es.
Me:Owcomeonmyl oveyouj ustover react ing, t
her eisabsol ut elynothingt owor ryaboutapha.
Her:Youcal lyoubei ngi nhospi talnot hi ng?Yourf athergettingshotr ighther eonhi sdoorstep?
Yourf ri
endspr ot ect i
ngmewi thagun, youcal lt
hatnot hing?
Me:Ij ustaskedt hem t ol ookaf teryouwhi leIwasawayt hat '
sal l, Phumzayoust i
llnewi ntown
andyoust illlear ni ng.SoIhadr easont owor r
yaboutyou.Idon' tknowwhyMandl ahadagun
withhi m.
Her:Thenhowdoyouexpl ainyourf at herget ti
ngshotont hesamedayt hatyougotdi scharged
andyouwer ewi thhi m wheni tal lhappenedYandi sapl easedon' tcallt hatnot hi
ng.Wi l
lwhoever
thatdi dt hi
scomebackt ohur tus?
Me:Nobabel i
st ent ome, whathappenedt odadwasnoti nanywayl inkedt owhathappenedt o
me.
Her:Yandi saIr espectyouasmyhusbandne?Butpl easedon' taskmet ot urnabl indeyet o
what 'sgoi ngoni nt hisf ami lybecauseIcan' t.Ifearf ormyl if
e, forourbabi esYandi sa.Foryou,
Idon' twantt ol oseyou.
Me:Andyouwontbabe, Iam notgoi nganywher eandnot hingwi llhappent oyou.Ipr omi se
nothi ngwi llhappent ous, wear est i
llgoi ngtol i
vel ong.Buyabi ghouseandhavet enki ds
maybe, wewi llwat cht hem gr owupt ohavet heirownki ds.Theywi l
lbecomebi gbusi ness
tycoons, doct or s.
Her:Pr omise?
Me:Ipr omi semyl ove, youhavenot hi ngt owor ryabout .
Her:Butnott heki dspar tbecausewenothavi ng10ki ds, t
heyenough.
Me:Wewi llseeaboutt hat .
Her:Yeahsi zobona.Il oveyou.
Me:Il oveyout oo.
Weshar edaki sst hencuddl edandf ellasleep.
.
Iwokeupear lyt hef ollowi ngdayandwentf oraqui ckshowert henwokeupever yonet oget
readyaswel l.Af terget tingdr essedIwentt omakecer ealformyt wosi stersandf ruitsal adfor
meandmywi fe, Imadei tjustt hewaymom madei t.Wi thul t
ramel .
Me:Br eakf asti sr eady!
Theyj oinedi nt heki t
chenonebyoneandt heywer en' tevendr essedyet ,theyhadt heirgowns
on.
Me:Whyar en' tyoudr essed?Wel eavi ngngoku.
Zethu:Hayi wet hubhut iwej ustwokeupnj e.
Me:What ever ,her ei syourbr eakf ast.
Olwet hu:Hehubhut i
.
Me:What ?
Olwet hu:Whyi syourbr eakf astdi ff
er ent?
Me:Becauseweondi et.
Theyl aughedandt ookt heirbr eakf astandwentt ot heki t
chen.
Me:St handwasam
Iwr appedmyar msar oundherwai standki ssedherl ips.
Me:Sor r
yf orwaki ngyouupt hi sear ly.
Shenodded, Ibabyki ssedhert hengaveherherbowl .
Her:Thanks.
Me:Pl easur e.
Wej oinedt heot hert woi nt hel ounge.AsIsatdownaknockcamet hr ought hedoor ,whowas
knocki ngatourf rontdoort hisear l
y?Thel astt i
mesomeoneknockedatsomeone' sf r
ontdoor
atshadyhour ssomeonedi ed.
Olwet hu:I '
llgeti t.
Shesai dget t
ingup, shehadahugesmi leonherf ace.
Me:Ar eyouexpect i
ngsomeone?Si tdown.
Shesatdown.Iputt hebowlont hecof feetablet hengotup.
Me:Whoi si t
?
Iwasn' taboutt ol osemyl ifeaf terpr omi singmywi fet hatwewer egoi ngt ol ivelong.
"Myout t
ie",whatwasMandl adoi ngher eatthishour ?Iopenedt hedoorf orhi m.
Him:Whatt imear ewel eavi ng?
Hepushedt hr oughmeatt hedoorandl ethimsel fin, Ipushedt hedoorandi tslammedshut .
Me:We?Wher ear eyougoi ng?Don' tyouhavewor k?
Him:Iaskedf oraf ewdaysof f.
Me:Andt heygr ant edt hem t oyou?
Him:Becausemybestf ri
endneedsme, mor ningever yone.Isthatforme?I tsli
keyour eadmy
mi nd.Si tdown, itsnotl ikewebusyonapr ojectyet .
Het ookmybowlandst ar tedeat i
ng.
Me:Haf utsekMandl at hat 'smi ne.
Him:Sor rymyout tieandt hanks.
Theyl aughedashesatdownonmyseat .
Phumza:Comeeatwi thmewenababe.
Isatnextt oherandshef edme.
Him:Howi sever yonebesi deswenaYandi sangobaIcanseeusemaf utheni.
Ichuckl edandki ssedmywi fe.
Him:Getar oom.( wel aughedandbr oket heki ss)Ol wethuhowar eyou?Feel i
ngbetter
?
IlookedatOl wet hu, engasancume.
Olwet hu:Iam now.
Him:Iam gl adyouar e.
Theyl ookedateachot herandsmi l
ed.Il ookedatMandl a,Iknewt hatlookanywhere.Mandl a
coul dn'thisf eel ingsver ywel l
,especi all
ywhenhel ikedsomeone.Hehadt hesamel ookhehad
ever yt
imehel ookedathi sgi r
l.Whatwasgoi ngonher e?
Me:Whatwast hat ?
Him:Whatwaswhat ?
Me:Ser iousl yMandl awhatar eyoudoi ngher e?
Him:Goi ngt oeMbongweni withyouguys.
Me:ButIdi dn' ttel lyout hatwel eavingt odayandatt hishour .
Him:ButOl wet hudi d.
DidImi sssomet hingher e?Wast heresomet hi
nggoi ngonbet weent hetwo?
Me:When?
Him:Lastni ght , Ic. .
.Nevermi nd.
Me:Youhavemysi st er'snumber ?Youcal li
ngmyl itt
lesisterMandla?Ol wethu?
Her :Iam nott hatl i
ttleanymor e..
Me:Hai boOl wet hu!Hayi !
Him:Shej ustneededsomeonet otal kto.
Me:Mybestf riend?Coul dn' tshecal loneofhergi rlfr
iends?
Him:Wi llyour el ax?Cal m downokay?Ol wet hucant alktowhoevershewant stotalktoit
doesn' tmat teri fwebestf ri
endsornot .Sheneededt otal
kandIwasavai lable.
IlookedatOl wet hut henatMandl a.
Me:Youbet terbenotchowi ngmyl ittlesi sterbecausei fyouar eMandl aIswearIam goi ng..
.
Hel aughed.
Him:Iam notchowi ngyoursi ster.
Me:Thatbet terbet hecaseandwenast opsmi l
ingapho!Gogetdr essed.
Theyal lgotupandwentt ot heki tchent henf oll
owedeachot hert
ot hepassage.Iturnedt o
Mandl a,hel aughed.
Him:Iam notchowi ngher !
Me:Younotgoodatl yi ngman, Isawt hatl ook.
Him:Whatl ook?
Me:Your" inlove"l ook.
Hel aughed.
Him:St opr eadi ngt oomuchi ntot hings.
Me:Don' tbr eakourbr ocodeman.
Him:Soi tonl yappl ieswheni tcomest ome?Youchowedal lmycousi ns.
Me:Cousi nsnotsi sterbutdon' tletmywi feheart hat.
Him:I tst hesamet hi ngt hough, sodi dyougetconf i
rmat i
onaboutJ?
Me:Yeahyougothi m, hei sgone.
Him:Ibethi swi fedi dn' tevencal lanambul ance.
Me:Thatwomankal ok!
Him:Jtreat edherl ikeshitkalok, beatherup.It hinkshei sgladhei sgone.
Me:Everyonei s.
Him:Indeed, t
hewor ldwillbeabet terplacewithouthim.
Me:Youcansayt hatagain, sowher eisyourbag?
Him:Homesodl ulakhona.
Me:Okayl etmegett hebag, l
adiesIhopeyoudone!Ekser i
nsethedishes.
Him:Qhel akakbi Iam notyourwi fe.
Me:Youat emyf oodsowasht hem.
Him:CallOl wethu, shewi l
ldoi t.
Me:Stayawayf r
om her .
HelaughedasIwentt ogett hebags, hehel pedmel oadt hem intheboot.Thenwewentback
i
nsidetof etchthel adies.
Me:Lwet huwehavet ogo.
Her:I
'm done.
Shepackedt hedi shesawayt henwewentoutt ot hecar,locki
ngthedoorbehi ndus.Wegoton
thecar,
Mandl aandIt oolthef rontseat .Theladiestookt heback, Iwasdriving.Wedrovet
o
Mandla'
shousef irsttogetherbagt hedr ovetothegar age,weneededaf ulltankandsome
thi
ngsfort heroad.Af tert
hatwedr oveoutofCapet own

33
Phumza:
Saturday...
Afteraver ylongandt iringj our neywef inallyr eachedourdest i
nat ion.I twasal readyget ting
darkwhenwegotof ft hecar .Yandi sa'sauntcamet owel comeust henl edust owher e
Yandisa'smot herandgr andmot herwer e.
Yandisa'saunt :Sisi,mamabhut iMzoxol o'
schi l
dr enhavear ri
ved.
Mamasatupandsmi led.Shel ookedexhaust edthough, herhusband' sdeat hwasr eall
ytaking
i
t'
st ollonher .
Mama:Howdi dyoudr ive?
Yandi:Saf elymama, ar eyouokay?
Shdnodded.
Mama:Mama( referri
ngt oYandi sa'sgr andmot her )thesear emychi ldren;uYandi sa,Zethuno
Olwethu.Andi thiyoucanst il
lseet hem?
Makhul u:Ewemakot i
, Yandi sakhawuzaphandodayi ninguMzoxol oezi hlalelekal okul o.(hegot
upandwentt oher )Umf uzi l
euyi sewangamshi yi.(youl ookj ustlikeyourf ather ).
Shehuggedandki ssedhi m.Mandl achuckl edbuthewasn' tloud.
Makhul u:Whi chonei sZet huandwhi chonei sOl wet hu?Ihaven' tseent hem si ncetheywer e
stil
lveryyoung, theydon' twantt hisol dwomankal okubona.
Theysmi l
edandgotupt oi ntroducet hemsel vesandgr eettheirgr andmot her .
Makhul u:Youar esool dnowkal okumnaIl astsawyouwhenyouwer estillver yyoung, eweI
am yourgr andmot her.Youdon' thaveanot heronebesi desme, yourf atherwasmyson.You
shouldcomevi sitmesomet ime, t
hisi syourhonet oo.(theynodded)UnconouYandi sahewas
heretwoyear sago, ezot hat hanankuumakot iwakhe.Yi zaumakhul uancami se.( Yandisai s
betterbecausehewasher et woyear sagot ot akeawi fe,comegr eetme)
Ismi l
edandgotup.Iwentt ogr eether ,shehuggedandki ssedme.Theni nt roducedust othe
otherwoment hatwer eal sosi ttingont hemat tr
ess, Iwassur pri
sedt oknowt hatYandi sast i
ll
hadagr eatgr andmot her .Thi sf ami lywasbl essedmos, Ididn'tevenhaveagr andmot her.My
childr
enwer egoi ngt obever yluckyt ohaveal ltheseol dwoment hatwer egoi ngt oloveand
blessthem.
Makhul u:Andwhoi stheot heryoungman?
Yandisa:That '
sMandl a, myf ri
end.
Makhul u:Ngumhl obowenenekel o, thankyouf orcomi ngMandl a.Yi zaumakhul uakubone.
(t
hisiswhatIcal lat r
uef riend.Come, letmeseeyou)
Mandl agotupandwentt oher ,shegr eetedhi mi nherway( hugandki ss).
Makhul u:Zet hul ookatt hisyoungman.I sn'thehandsome?Yourmat esar emar ri
ednowyou
shouldt oo.
Zethul ookedatMandl at henatOl wet huwhol ookedabi tir
ritatedl ol.
Zethu:Hai bomakhul u.
Makhul ulaughed.
Makhul u:Hewi llmakeagoodhusband.( Mandl alaughed)Onaser i
ousnot e,thankyou
bant wanabam i tisgoodseei ngyounobai t
snotonaver ypl easantcasekodwawet hankt he
Lor d.Mandl at hankyou, cont inuebei ngagoodf r
iendt omygr andson.
Mandl a:Ewemakhul u.
Makhul u:Hayi keumakaziwenu( youraunt )wi llshowyout oyourr ooms.Makot iyoursi ster s
will t
el lyouwhatt odoandwher etogo.
Wenoddedt hengotupandwal kedoutwi t
hmakazikaYandi sa.Sheshowedust oourr ooms,
tol
dusaboutoursl eepi ngar rangement s.Yandi saandIwer egoi ngt osl eepindi fferentr ooms,
hewasshar i
ngwi thMandl aandIwassl eepi ngwi thoZet hu.Anywayaf tertakingourbagsi n
Yandi sawal kedi ntoourr oom, Ol wet huwasst i
llcompl ai
ningaboutt hel oudgener atorout side.
Ther ewas/ isnoel ect ricitykal okukul endawo.
Him:Thatmakest het woofussi si.
Olwet hu:Ican' twai ttogetoutofher e, thispl aceandt hisfami lywher ewer et heyal lthose
year s?Onyourweddi ng?Theydi dn'tevencomet oyourweddi ngaf ter"negotiating"f oryour
bridepr ice.
Zethu:Andnowweexpect edt osmi l
eandpr et endl i
kewet hi st i
ghtf ami l
y.
Yandi sa:Let 'sj ustst icki toutf oraf ewdays, let slaydadt or estt henwecangobackhome.
Theynodded.
Him:Babepl easegetmeandMandl abat hingwat erpl ease, Ihaven' thadabat hsinceFr i
day
mor ning.
Inoddedandwal kedout ,Iwentt omakazit oaskwher eIcoul dgetwat er.Iwasal sonewi nt hi
s
fami lykal oksoIdi dn' tknowhowt hingswor kedar oundher e.
Her :Ther eisabi gbl ackpotont hef ire, ithashotwat er.Nobanzi !
"Ma! ",shecamer unni ng.Shesmi ledwhenshesawme, weusedt obecl osef ri
endsunt i
lIhad
tost ophangi ngwi thmyagegr oup.Iwasget tingmar riedsoIhadt olear nthewaysofbei nga
goodwi f
esot hatcamewi thmedi stanci ngmysel ffrom her , wedi dn' thaveanyt hingi n
commonanymor e.
Makazi :ShowPhumzawher et hesmal ltubsar e.
Shenoddedandwewentt ogett het ubs.
Nobanzi :Youj ustl eftnj ewi thoutsayi nggoodbye.
Me:Sor rychommi ebutyouki ndofknewt hatIwasl eavingwhenYandi sa'smot herwasher e.
Her :Yeahyeahsohowi st hemar riagel ifetreat ingyou?
Me:Hei ssweetandhemakesmehappysoi tst r
eatingmer eal l
ygood.
Her :Whowoul dhavet hought .
Me:Don' tevenment i
oni t.
Wel aughedandt ookt hewat ert oYandi sa'sr oom.
Him:Thankyoumyl ove.
Me:Cal lmewhenyouneedanyt hingne?
Him:Okayst handwasam.
Heki ssedmyl ips,wel ljustapeckt henIl eftthem t ohaveabat h.Igotmysel fwat ert oot hen
wentt ohaveabat h, Nobanziwaskeepi nguscompany.Shewasj ustf il
li
ngmei nonal lthe
jui
cygossi pyasel al i
ni.
Noba:Yongamahasbeenaski ngaboutyou.
Me:Mci m whatdoeshewantl owo?
Noba:Hewasr eallyt ornwhenyouj ustl eft.
Zethu:Whoi sYongama?
Me:Someoneboywhousedt oi r r
itateme, hewant edmet obehi sgi rlf
ri
end.
Noba:Her eal l
yl ovedhershamebutyuhuchommi ewam, shedi dn'twantanyboynearher .I
am st i
llsur prisedt hatshedi dn' trunaway, t
hatshei smar riednow.
Me:Hayiwet huyouexagger ating.
Zethu:Herhusbandcanvouchf oryou, uthisheusedt ocr yar oundhi m.
Ohmygosh!Ican' tbel ieveYandi sat ol dhert hat ,
itwasembar rassi ng.Iwasr eallyshyback
then.
Noba:That 'smyf riendf oryou.
Theyl aughedandcont inuedt alkingaboutme.
.
Afterhavi ngabat hIwentt omakazii nt heki tchen.
Me:WhatcanIhel pwi t
hmama?
Iwasbeyondexhaust edbutIwant edt omakeagoodi mpr essiont other estoft hef ami l
y.
Her :Yourpar ent sj ustar ri
vedsomaket eaf ort hem ubuyekeandhel pmeapha.
Inoddedandmadet eat hent ooki ttot he8cor nerhut ,
wher et hewomenwer e.AfterthatIwent
tohel pi nt heki tchen, Ididn' tevenhavet imet ot alktomymot her .Therewasal ott odo.I t
i
nvol vedcl eani ng, cooki ng, maki ngt eaf oral ltheguest s,bakingbr eadandmuf f
insf ort he
guest sandwashi ngt hedi shes.Idon' tknowhowmanyt i
mesIwashedt hedi shesi nj ustone
nightngaphaIhadt oat tendt oYandi sa, ifhewant edsomet hinghecal ledme.Ij ustthi nki twas
hisexcuset oseeme.Whenwehadgot t
enal lourni ghtchor esdonewewentt obed, assoonas
Igoti nbedmyphoner ang.I twasYandi sasoIt ooki t
,wespokef orafewmi nutesthenhung
up.Hej ustwant edt ohearmyvoi ce.
.
At5h30makaziwokemeup.
Her :Umakot idoesn' tsleept illt
hi shour ,
t hereisal ottodot oday.
Imoanedandpul ledupt hebedcover .Iwasst illti
redfr om t
her oadt ri
pandl astnight ,wesl ept
l
at e.
Her :Comegetup, ther ei snowat eri nt hebucket s.
Ihuf fedandshovedt hebl anket st ot hesi det hengotup.Iqui cklygotdr essed, i
twasf reezi ng
cold.Af t
ert hatIwentt ot heki t
chen, theot hermakot i
swer eal readyt herebusy.Igr eet edthen
tookwar m wat erandwentt obr ushmyt eeth.If eltsomeonehugmef r
om behi ndandIj ust
knewi twasYandi sa, heki ssedmyneck.
Him:Mor ningbabe.
Ikissedhi scheek.
Me:Mor ning.
Hel etgoofmeandst oodnextt ome.
Me:Youupear ly.
Him:Ij ustwant edt oseet hispl ace.
Me:Sowhatdoyout hink?
Him:I 'mj oki ngImi ssedyou, what '
syourexcuse?
Me:Ihavet of etchwat erf rom t her iver .
Him:Andwher ei st her i
ver ?
Me:Nott hatf ar.
Him:Baber ememberwhatt hedoct orsai d?Noheavychor es.
Me:IknowbutwhatcanIdo?Iam awi f
eaphasoIhavet odoasIam t ol d.
Him:Hmm wantmet ocomewi thyou?
Me:No.
Him:No?
Me:Whatwi llyourgr andf at hersay?Youruncl es?
Him:Awucomeonnoonewi llknowandwhat '
swr ongwi thmeaccompanyi ngmywi fe?
Me:Okayndi yeza.
Iqui cklyf i
ni shedwhatIwasdoi ngt henwentt of etchabucketandwewal kedt othewat er
stream t oget her.
Him:Sot hisi swher eyougr ewup?
Me:Yepal ittlebackwar df oryou?
Him:Toobackwar d, howdopeopl esur viveapha?Ther ei snoel ectri
cit
y, nowat er,nopr oper
roadsandt het oi l
etsgeez!
Ilaughed.
Me:Whenyoul iveher eyoudon' tthinkt hesamewayyout hinkingr i
ghtnow.I t
ssomucheasy
becauseweusedt ot hisl i
f e.
Him:Hmmm. .
Me:Sot ellmewhat '
sonyourmi nd?
Him:Not hing.
Me:Wehaven' tbeent oget herf orl ongandImi ghtnotknowyout hatwel lbutIknowyounota
mor ni ngper son.Younotanear lybi rd.
Hel ookedatmet hent ookt hebucketf r
om meandcar riedit.
Him:I tsj ustt hatIcan' tbel i
evet hatIam her et oar rangemyf ather'sbur i
al, Ithoughtwewoul d
beher ef orourweddi ng.Dadwoul dbest ill alive,introduceust othef ami lypr oper ly...Buthe
i
sn' tbabe, Iam her et oar rangemyf at her'sbur ial
.
Me:Iknowbuti tget seasi erever yday.
Him:Yeah.Doyout hinkIam abadper son?
Me:Why?
Him:Bei ngher esur roundedbyal lthesepeopl ewhopr etendt oknowmeandhowIam f eeling..
.
Ijust .Idon' tknowhowt of eel exact lyorhowt or espondt othem.
Me:It houghtt hesepeopl ewer eyourf ami ly.
Him:Af ami l
yIneverr eal l
yknewunt ilrecent lyIf eellikeast rangeratmyownf ather '
shome, I
don' tknowwher et ogo.Ij ustf eell ost ,l
ikeanout cast .Ever yoneher eknowseachot her,Iam
meet ingmy" cousi ns"f ort hef irst.Iwi shIknewwhywewer eneverpar toft hi sfami l
y,Ihaveso
manyquest ionsi nmymi nd.( hesi ghedl oudl y)Ijustwi shwemetonadi fferentencount ernot
deat h.
Me:Ican' tpr etendl ikeIunder standhowyouf eelingr ightnoworwhat 'sgoi ngoni nyourmi nd
butj ustt ryt obepar toft hef ami ly.Puti nsomeef forttogett oknowever yone, don' tbesohar d
onyour sel fandt hem.
Him:Ther ei snot imef ort hatnj est handwawi thever yt hinggoi ngonapha, thef uner al
prepar ationsst ar ttomor rowsot her ewi l
lbenot i
mef ort hat.
Me:Thel ittl
et imeyouhave, usei tt ogett oknowyourcousi ns.
Het ookmyhandandki ssedi t.
Him:It hinkdadknewexact lywhathewasdoi ngwhenhechoseyouf orme, youwi se.
Me:Thankyou.
Him:AndIl oveyouf ort hat .
Ilookedathi m andsmi led.
Him:It houghtyousai dt hispl acewasn' tt hatf ar.
Me:Weal mostt her e.
Henoddedandwecont inuedwal king.Wef inal lygott ot her iver ,t
her ewer epeopl et here
fetchi ngwat erandsomewer ewashi ngt hei rcl othes.Igr eeted, theyr epli
edbackandsome
madecomment st hatIcoul dn'thearsoIpai dnoat tent i
ont ot hem.
Him:I st hiswat erevencl ean?
Ilaughedandpul l
edhi mt owar dst hewat ert hent oasmal lspr i
ngcomi ngf rom t hemount ains.I
pour edi ttot hebucketandwashedi tthenf il
ledi tup.IgaveYandi saaj ugofwat er.
Me:Tast et his.
Him:Myquest ionwasi sitcl ean?
Me:Justt ast ei t.
Het ooki tanddr anki t.
Him:I tssocol d, itslikest illwat er.
Me:Exact lyandi tscl ean.
Him:Ndi yabona.
Hedr ankmor e.
Him:I tscol dkamnandi .
Me:Iknewyouwoul dl ovei t ,hel pmeputt hi sonmyhead.
Hequi cklyputt hej ugdownt henhel pedmewi ththebucket .Af terhelpingmehet ookt hejug
andwewal kedbackhomet alking.
Him:I sn' titheavy?
Me:Notr eal l
y.
Him:Becauseyouusedt oit?
Me:Yep.
Him:Icanseeyounotevenusi ngyourhands, howdoyoubal ancei tsoitdoesn' tfallof f
?
YuhYandi saandquest ionskodwa, Ianswer edhi m.
.
Whenwegothome, Iwentt oputt hebucketi nt heki t
chenandt ookanot herone.Iwentt of etch
thesecondbuckett hent hi rdandf ourth,Yandi sawasn' taccompanyi ngmeanymor e.Iwentt o
fetcht hef our t
handsi xtht henwentt oboi lwat ert ohaveabat h.Iwasst andingout sidewi th
ZethuwhenMakazi wal kedovert ous.
Makazi :Phumzayourmot heri saskingf oryou, uthishewant syout ogoshoppi ngmor efamily
member swi llbear rivingt odaysoweneedmor egr oceries.
Me:Ewema.
Makazi :Okaykebhabha.
Shewal kedawaysoIwentt owher emamakaYandi sawas, Isatdownnextt oher .
Me:Ul elenj anima?
Her :Isleptr eallywel l,Ihopet heynotoverwor kingyou.
Me:I t
snot hingIcan' thandl ema.
Her :Butyourhusbanddoesn' tthi
nkso.
Me:OhmamaYandi sawor riesovernot hing.
Her :Youar est il
linyourmostf ragil
est ageofyourpr egnancyIwantyout or estokay?Ial ready
spoket omakaziaboutgi vingyouchor es, youcanst icktomaki ngt eaandhel pingwi t
ht he
cooki ngbutgetasmuchr estaspossi ble.IfIheart hatyoudi danyt hi
ngmor eI'llgetupf rom
thi
smat tressandsor tsomepeopl eout .
Ismi l
ed.
Me:Al ri
ghtmamaIwi llrest .
Her :Okaybaby.Iwantyout ohaveabat h, eatt hengot otownf orme.Her eisal ist,get
ever ythingont hel istandher eisthemoney.I tshoul dbeenough.( Inodded)Ial readyt ol
d
Yandi sat hathehast ogowi thyou.
Me:Al ri
ghtmamawewi l
lgetever yt
hing.
Her :Thankyoubaby.
Inodded.
Me:Wi l
lyouneedanyt hingbef orewel eave?
Her :NobabybutIwantyouher enextmewhenyoucomeback, Idon' twantt hem t ooverwor k
you.Iknowt heycanbebul l
iesespecial l
ysi ncet heyknowt hatyouyoungandyougr ewupr i
ght
i
nf rontoft hem.
Me:Ewema, I'
llgogetr eady.
Her :Alrightmyl ove.
Igotupandwal kedout .Iwentt ogetr eady.
.
.
Yandi sa:
"BabeIhopeyour eady" , Isaidwal kingintot hei rr oom.
Olwet hu:Don' tyouknowhowt oknock?
Me:I t
snotl ikeyounaked.
Olwet hu:Butwhati fIwas?
Me:Butyounot .Ol wet hukhameman, myl ove.
Phumi :Al mostdone.
Me:Wewi llwai tforyoui nt hecar .
Olwet hu:Whoi swe?
Me:Mandl aandI .
Olwet hu:CanIcomet oo?
Me:Tsek!
Phumi :I'm done, l
et sgo.
Itookherhandandwewal kedoutt hent ot hecar .Iopenedt hef rontpassengerdoorf orher,
shegoti nandcl osedt henIwentt ogetonmysi de.Mandl at ookt hebackseat ,onlyPhumza
knewt hispl acewel lsoshewasgoi ngt odi r
ectme.Ist ar t
edt hecaranddr oveout .
Mandl a:Ihopet herei sawi mpyi nyourt own, Iam cr avingt heirbr eakfast.
Phumza:Yeahukhona.
Me:Gr eatwecanst artther e, nam Ineedsomet hi ngwi thoi lhayi t
hatbr eakfastwehad.What 's
breadandt eaf orbr eakf ast ?
Phumza:Ani saphakemeQhawe.
Me:I t
'
sevenaboutt hatbutbabeyouknowIl ovemyEngl ishbr eakf ast.
Mandl a:I'
llbehonestwi t hyou, Iam modest
.Nooff
enceboetbutt hatwasonecrappybreakf
ast
.
Wequi ckl
ylookedathi m andl aughed.
Her:OhmyGodyouguys.
Ilookedather .
Me:Iwasj ustsayi ngtheyshoul daccommodat
eeveryone.
Her:Iunder stand.
Me:Soyoudon' tthinkndi phakeme?
Her:NahIwasj oking.
Inoddedandl ookedatt her oad.Whenwegottotownwest artedatwimpy,wehadbr eakf
ast
thengotr i
bsandchi pstakeawaysf orOlwet
huandZethu.Thenwel eftf
orShopr
ite.Wegot
everythingthatwasont hel ist,pai
dthenwentt
oloadeveryt
hinginthecar.AndMandl adr
ove
ushome.

34
Yandi sa:
Whenwegothome, Mandl apar kedt henwegotof f.Phumzar ant owar dst hegat eimmedi atel
y
afterwegotof f,Iwonder edwhyshewasr unning.
"ohBul elwa",shewaswal kingi nwi t
hherpar ent s.Theyhuggedexci tedl ybenoPhumza, I
wal kedtowar dst hem t oobutonl yt ogreetherpar ent s.Ididn'twantt ocomeacr ossasr ude.
Me:Mol weni .
Them:Mol onyana, uphilele?
Me:Iam goodt hankshowaboutyou?
Them:Wegood.
Tata: Howar eyouhol dingup?
OhmyGod!Thatquest ionpi ssedmeof fbutIwasn' tabouttober udet ot hemant hatfathers
mywi fe.
Me:Hayinokot at athingsar enott hatbadanymor e.
Tata: Good, uqinei ndodai yaqi na.(best rong)
Me:HayiIam t ryingformysi stersandmot her'ssake.Andf ormywi f
et oo,Ican'taf f
ordt obe
weak.
Tata: Hmm Ihear dukubasewuvel ewabet haiqanda, congratulati
ons.( Ihear dthatshei s
pregnant )
Hehel douthi shandsoIshooki t.
Me:Thankyou.
Tata: AndIcanseeyout reatingherwel l
, continuedoi ngso.Iwaswor riedabouther .
Me:Kant ieveryf atherwoul dbutshei sinsaf ehandsyoudon' thavet owor r
y.
Henodded.
Tata: Hayikeletmegoseeyourgr andf ather ,
joinus.
Inoddedandwentt ohel pMandl aof fl
oadt hegr ocer i
es.
.
.
Phumza:
Iwasst i
lltal
kingt oBul elwawhendadobawokaYandi sawal kedoutoft hekitchenandcamet o
us.
Dabs:Ohher eyouar e,udl aindabawhent herear eguest sthatneedt obeat tended.I sthet ea
goingt omakei tself?
Hai boIjustgother emos, myf eethur tandIam t i
red.
Me:It houghtt her ewassomeonehel pingyoui nside.
Dads:Whi chsomeone?Peopl ewentt othei rhouses, theydidt heirchor esthenl eft.
Me:I 'm sorryI'
ll
...
Bulelwal ookedatme.
Dabs:St opbei ngsor ryandgetonwi thit,woahumakot i!
Shecl appedonceandputherhandsonherwai st
.
Me:I 'l
lseeyouwhenIam done.
BulenoddedsoIwentt otheki tchen.Imadet eaf ort heguest sthenwentt oser vet hem.Af ter
thatIwentt otheki tchen.
Dabs:Taket heseandgoser vet hement hatar einthesi tti
ngr oom.Whenyoudonecomeback.
Shegaveme4bot tlesoft wol itredr inksandgl asses.It ookt hedrinkst othem fir
stthenwentt o
fetcht hegl asses, Iputt hegl assesdownt henwentbackt otheki t
chen.Theywer egoingt ohelp
themsel ves.
Me:Dabawo.
Shel ookedatme.
Her :OhyesIwi llneedyout ost artthef iref ormephaout sideafterthatwasht hosebigpots
nextt ot hef irepl ace.Whenyoudonepeelandchopt heveget ablesf orme, wear egoingtocook.
Ohandt hedi shesneedt obewashed.
Inoddedt hent ookpaper sandmat ches.Iwentout sidewi ththem, Ilookedar oundforwood.I t
wasi nbi gshor tlogsmeani ngIhadt ocutmyownf i
rewood.Shesentachi l
dtogivemeanaxe
touseandIgotonwi t
hi t.Ndi ngadi nwangakengowomzuzu, Iwasj ustsoexhaust ed.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Wewer ei nZet hu, Ol wet huandPhumza' sroom j ustt alki
ngt othegi rl
sandhavi ngagoodl augh.
Mandl a:Wher ei swi feykant i?
Ishr uggedmyshoul ders.
Bulelwa:Yourauntaskedhert omaket heel derstea.
Me:Shoul dn'tshebedoner ightnow?
Bule:Sheshoul dbutIdoubtt hat '
sal lshei sdoi ng.
Zethu:Ladadobawowakhoi snotgi vingheranybr eathingspace.
Me:Ispoket omom abouti t,Idon' twantmywi fetol oseourki ds.Thedoct orgaveusst ri
ct
i
nst ructionst of ollow, sheshoul dber est ing.
Bule:Ki ds?I sshepr egnant ?
Inodded.
Olwet hu:Wi tht wi ns?
Me:Di dIsayt hat ?
Zethu:Yousai dki ds.
Me:Di dI ?Maybeyoudi dn' thearmepr oper ly.
Iwant edt heki dst obeasur pr iset ot hem.
Mandl a:Outwi thi tal r
eady.
Me:I tsj ustonebabynotbabi es.I 'l
lgol ookf ormywi fe.
Olwet hu:I tslikesheusedsomemagi conyou.
Me:Ut shongoba?
Olwet hu:Youj ustsohunguponher , ever ymi nuteyoucal li
ngher .Youwantt oseeheral lt
he
ti
me.
Mandl a:Thankyou!Weal wayssayi ngt hesamet hing, it
sliketherei snof unwi t
houtyourwi f
e.
Zethu:It hinki tscut e.
Mandl a:I t
'stoomuch, yougoonl iket her eisnot omor row.
Me:Onceyouf allinloveyou' llunder st andt hemeani ngofspendi ngever ymi nutewithyour
par t
ner .Letmegocheckonherne?
Igotupandwal kedout .WhenIsawmywi fechoppi ngwoodangerj ustcamer ushingintomy
hear t,whot ellsapr egnantwomant ochopwood?Noscr atchthat!Whot ell
sawomant ochop
woodwhent her ear esomanyboys/ menwhocandot his?Iwal kedovert oher.
"Iwaswonder i
ngwher eyouwer ekant iubusyapha, ",shel ookedatmet henbrokethelogi n
half.
Me:Hu- huhbabe!Hu- huhyoucan' tdot hat ,putthatdownandgoi nside.Youhaven' tr
ested
sincewegother e, lastni ghtyousl eptl ate.Todayyouwokeupt of etchwat ernowyoucut t
ing
wood?Ar eyout ryingt ol oset hi spr egnancy?
Ipul l
edt heaxeoutofherhands.
Her :Ican' tYandi saIhavet ost artt hef i
re, washt hesepot sthenst artcooking.
Ilookedather .
Me:I sn'tt heresomeonehel pingyou?
Her :Ther eisnooneYandi sasodoyoumi nd?
Shehandedoutherhand, Ithr ewt heaxeont heground.Wasshebei ngser i
ousr i
ghtnow?
Didn' tthedoct ort ellhert or est ?Di dsheevencar e?
Me:Ar eyoubei ngser iousr ightnowPhumza?Thi s( Ikickedt hel og)itsaman' sj ob, you
shoul dn'tbedoi ngi tespeci allyi nyourst atemanPhumza!
"Canyoul ethergetonwi thherchor esordon' tyouwantt oeat ?",shesaidbehi ndme.It urned
tolookather .
Me:Cal lsomeoneel set odot hisbecausemywi fei sn' tdoi ngi t,it
snotherj ob.
Dabs:I fshedoesn' tdoi twhowi ll?
Me:Idon' tknowandIdon' tcar e!Shei smywi fe, notyoursl ave.Younotgoi ngt omi st reather.
Dabs:Mi st r
eat ?Noonei smi streat ingherher e.Sheknowshowt hingsaredoneapha
emakhaya.Ast hever yf irstwi f
et obeeverbr oughti nbyt hegr andchildr
enabal aphashehast o
provehercapabi l
ities, kubonakal et hatt her ei sayoungwi fe.Thi sishowt hingsar edoneapha
emakhaya, kumel eakot ize.
Me:Thendot hem t osomeoneel senotuPhumza, getawi fef oryoursont hent reathert hisway.
Owam akazuphat hwakanj alo.
Shecl appedonce.
Dabs:Mabhongoal oPhumzawhoi sanobody!
Me:Whatdi dyouj ustcal lher ?!
Phumzapul l
edmeback.Icant oler atesomeonedi srespect i
ngmeandcal li
ngmenamesbut
notmywi fe, notPhumza.
Phumza:Yandi sa. .
.
Me:Anobodyi syoudoyouhearme? !
Dabs:YeyIam yourel deryouwi ll notpoi ntatmel ikeIam yourmat e!
"Hai bowhat '
st hisnoi seaboutNokul ungi sa? ",mom askedst andi ngbyt hedoor .Ever yonecame
outt oseewhatwasgoi ngon, Iwasaboutt obl owof f.
Me:I sn'titthi swomancal lingmywi feanobody? !
Phumza:Yandi sapl ease.
Agai nshepul ledmebymyar m.
Mom:Hai boNokul ungi sat hat 'ssomeone' sdaught er.
Dabs:I tst il
ldoesn' tchanget hef actt hatshe. ..
Bul elwa:Atl eastt hatnobodyi smar ri
edunl ikeyouumdal auzal elaekhaya.Yourchi ldrenar e
choi ceassoci at ed, 5di f ferentf at her subeseuzobi zamysi steranobody.Howdar eyou? !
Bul e'sf ather:Bul elwa!
Bul e:I t
st het rut hdaddy.Shecan' tdi srespectmysi sterandexpectmet oshutup!Shei sa
disgr ace!
Hi m:Twowr ongsdon' tmakear i
ghtBul elwaIt houghtIt aughtyout hat.
Bul e:Youdi ddaddybut .
..
Dad:Nobut sBul elwa!Lear nf rom yoursi ster .
Sher olledhereyesandf ol dedherar msi nf rontofherchest .
Mom:Wher edi dal loft hisst art?
Me:Shei smaki ngmywi fedoal lthesechor est hathar dal lalone, cutti
ngfirewoodokabani
umf azi?
Dadobawo: That '
swhatdaught erinl awsar ef or !
Mom:No!Noandno!Shei smydaught erinl awnotyour s,ifther ei sanyonet hatisgoi ngt o
treatherl iket hati ti sme.Bakhonaomakot ibal aphawhydon' ttheydoal lofthis?Nokul ungisaI
thoughtwespokeaboutt hi s, shecan' tdoal loft hesechor es.
Dadobawo: Shei sn'tt hef irstwomant of allpr egnantwhyshoul dshebet reatedl i
keaqueen?
"Khani yekei ndabayoqueennezi febe, namachoi ceassoci atedandgi vememyson" ,adeep
andunf ami li
arvoi cesai dbyt hegat e.Weal l tur nedt ol ookatt hi
sman.Hewasdr essedi nall
blackbuthel ookedsmar t.It ur nedt oPhumza.
Me:Whoi shi sson?
Her :Idon' tknow.
Hi m:Don' tjustst andt her eandst ar eatmeangat hi ndithengi saamat humbhunenhl oko, where
i
smyson?Makot hi ist hiswher eyouar egoi ngt obur ymyonl yson?
Mom:Tat auDl ami ni...
Shewal kedt owar dshi m.Whot hehel list hismanandwhoi shi sson?Howdoesmom know
him?
35
Yandi sa:
Myst er i
ousman:Youhavebeenf aithfultohim al lyourl i
fewhydoyouhavet obetrayhi m now,
atdeat h?Huh?Youknowver ywel lthathewant ednot hingt odowi tht hisplaceandf ami l
ybut
hereyouar ecomi ngt obur yhi m her e.
Mom:I -hmm. ..
Myst er i
ousman:Don' tmumbl et alk.
Me:Don' tt alkt omymot herl iket hat .
Mom:Yandi sa. ..Idi dn' thaveyourcont actdet ail
st ataIam sor ry.
Henodded.
Granddad:Whatar eyoudoi ngher e?
Him:Ohyoudi dn'tknowt hatIwasbackhuh?Wel lIam her ef ormysonMzoxol oDl amini,you
didn'thonest lyt hi nkt hatIwasgoi ngt oletyouNcaphayi sbur yhi m di dyou?
Ilookedatgr anddadt henatt hisman.Whatt hehel lwasheonabout ?WhowasNcaphayi
ngoku?Whywast hi smancl aimi ngdadashi sson?
Him:Iwantmyson' sbodysoIcangobur yhim athi sr i
ght fulpl ace.
TatakaPhumza:It hinkwewi llleaveyout otal kasaf ami ly,makaPhumzanaweBul elwal ets
go.
Him:AhMaj olauyaphi l
a?
TatakaPhumza:Ver ywel lsir,itsgoodseei ngyouagai n.
Him:Aht hankyouf orl ett
ingmeknowaboutmyson' spassi ng.
TatakaPhumza:Mzoxol owoul d'vewant edyout oknow.
Him:Thankyouonceagai n.
Henoddedandt ookhi sfami lyt henl eft
.IlookedatPhumza, sheshr ugged.Ishookmyhead
thenl ookedatt hisman.
Granddad:Youcangoi nsidenowt heshowi sover ,Dlami nil et sgoi nsi desowecant alklike
man.
Him:HeywenaIam notgoi ngt osi tdownwi thyouj ustgi vememyson' sbodyandI '
l
lbeoutof
yourhai r.
Granddad:Yoursonwasal somyson, youcan' thavehi sbody.
Him:Oh!Hei syoursonnowj ustbecausehei sgone?Whataboutwhenhewasal ivehuh?I
knowyourt ype, youaf t
erhi sweal t
hr i
ght?Wel lyounotgoi ngt oget tingit,i
tbelongst ohiswi f
e
andki ds.Makot it akeyourbagsnaweQhawe, Zet hu, Olwet huandPhumza.Thecari swait i
ng
outside, wedon' thaveal lday.
Hewasl ooki ngst raightatusashesai dournames, meani ngheknewexact lywhowaswho.I
haveneverseent hi smanbef ore, howdi dheknowussowel l?Di ddadhaveanot herf amily
besidest hisone?
Me:How. .
.whati sgoi ngonher e?Howdoyouknowmyname, howdoyouknowmysi sterand
wife?Whoar eyou?
Him:Yourgr andf ather ,yourf at her '
sf ather.
Whywer en' twei nt roduced?
Me:Andhi m?
Ipoint edt ogr anddad.
Him:Thatmani shi sst epfather ,theonet hatwant ednot hi ngt odowi thhim.Iam sur pri
sedt hat
hewant ssomet hi ngt odowi thhi m nowbutI '
llexpl ainlatergogetyourbagssowecango.
Mom:Gogetyourbagski ds.
Me:Yemamawhat '
sgoi ngonapha?
Mom:Iwi l
lexpl ainl at erfornowpl easegetyourbagssi zohamba.
Me:Wher eto?
Mom:Yourf ather 'sbi ologicalhome.
Me:It houghtt hiswasi t.
Mom:Nobabyt hi si sn'tit
,itneverwasf oraver ylongt i
me.
Me:Younotmaki ngsense, whydi dyoubr ingusher eint hef i
rstpl ace?
Mom:Yandi sat akeyourbagssi zohambhaniman.
Him:Qhawepl easet akeyourbagssowecango, wehaveal ott odor egar
dingyourf ather's
burial.Pl easegogetyourbags.
Me:Iam notdoi ngt hatbef oreyout el lmeexact lywhati sgoi ngonher e.
Gr anddad:Dl ami niyounotgoi ngt ot akeMzoxol oagai n.Hehast obebur iedher e,cl oset ohi s
mot her.
Gr andf ather :OhIt ookhi m away?Di dn'tyoudr ivehi m andhi swi f
eaway?Yout hinkIdon' t
know?Imi ghthavebeenawayf oraver ylongt imebutmysonandIwer ei ncont actever yday,
het ol dmeever yt hi ng.Fr om t hewayyout reatedhi m asayoungboyt ohowyoudi sownedhi m
asayoungman.Hewant ednot hingt odowi tht hi sfamilysoyoubet t
ert hi nkagai nbef ore
aski ngmenott ot akehi m.Tel lel axokazanabel i
bi zangoni na( t
hatl airhecal l
edmot her )thatI
am her ef ormysonandgr andchi ldren.
Gr anddad:Youcan' tt aket hem, mywi feisn'twel l.Shecan' tlosehi m agai n.
Him:Iam donet al king, Iam movi ngmysont oanot hermor tuaryf ir
stt hingt omor rowmor ning.I
am notgoi ngt ost opyouf rom at tendi nghi sf uner al,
youcani fyouwantt obuthewontbe
get ti
ngbur iedher e.Makot iar ewegoi ngt ocomewi t
hmeornot ?
Shenodded.
Mom:Yandi sa.
Me:Ol wet hu, Zet hu, babepl easepackyourbags.
Phumza:Ar eyousur e?
Me:Yeahi t
squi teevi dentt hatdadwant edanyt hingt odowi ththem andIneedanswer s.It hink
theol dmanhasal lt heanswer ssowewi l
lfoll
owt heol dman.
Shenoddedandwentt ot her oom t heywer eusi ng.Mandl aandIwentt ot heonewewer eusing.
Mandl a:Yourpapshasl ef tsomuchdr amabehi nd.
Me:Tel lmeabouti t.Ij ustwi shhewashonestwi thmengobangokuIf eelandl ookl ikeaf ool,I
don' tknowwhatt odo.
Him:Younotaf oolmanyouj ustconf usedbutt rut hbet oldhedoesl ookl i
keyourdadandyou.
Me:Hayimanhedoesn' tlookl ikeme.
Thedoorswungopenandgr anddadwal kedin.
Gr anddad:Yourgr andmot herhasaskedf orameet i
ngwi thyouandDl ami nisopl easecome
wi thme.
Me:Loadt hebagsi nt hecarsol ongI '
llbewi thyoushor tl
y.
Mandl a:Okay.
Ifollowedaf tergr anddadt ot her oom gr anwasi n.
.
Whenwegott her eIf oundDl ami nit hereal ready, Isatdownnextt ohi m.Thatwast heonl yseat
avai lable.
Me:Ther eonl yr easonIam si ttingher ewi thal lofyoui sbecauseIwantt het r
uth, ifyougoi ng
tol i
et omeIwi llt akedadbackt oCapet ownandbur yhim wi thoutal lofyou.Idemandhonest y
from al lofyou, st ar t
ingwi thyoumama.Howdoyouknowt hi sman?
Mama:That '
syourgr andf at herbabyIdon' tknowhowmanyt i
meswehavet ot ellyou.
Me:Thenhowcomehewasneverpar tofourl ives?Wher ewasheal ltheseyear s?
Dlami ni:Ithinkyoushoul ddi rectt hosequest i
onst ome.
Me:Justanswert hedamnquest ions!
Dlami ni:Yourt emper ,youbet terwat chit.
Me:Don' ttellmewhatt odo!
Dlami ni:Mci m Iam Dl ami niuZi ziJamakasj aduyourf ather '
sbi ologicalf ather.Idi dn' tknow
thatIhadasonunt il25year sagowhenhecamet oseemei npr i
son.That '
sthever yf irsttime
wemet , wecl ickedr ightaway.Iknewhewasofmyownbl ood, myf ir
standonl yson.Webui lt
ourr el
at i
onshi pwhi leIwasbehi ndbar s,heusedt ovisitmeever yweek.Hewassupposedt o
bet her eyest er daywhenIgotr eleased, towel comeme.Buti nsteadsadnewswel comedmeon
theout sidemysonwhi chwast heonl ythingt hatIwasr eallylookingf or war dtoseei ngi sgone
soIt houghtIshoul dcomest r aighther ef orhisbody.
Makhul u:Younott aki nghi m.
Dlami ni:Wel lwat chme!
Makhul u:Yout ur nedmysonagai nstmenowyouwantt otakehi m awayf rom me? !
Dlami ni:HeycomedownIcanhearyou, Iam notdeaf .
Gr anddad:Don' tt alkt omywi fel iket hat!
Dlami ni:Doyout hi nkshedeser vesmyr espect ?No!Youhi demysonf rom mef or20year sof
hislife,yougavehi mt oanot herman.Thatver ysamemant r
eatedhiml i
keshi t
, l
ikehewasa
nobody.Di dyoupr otecthi m?No!Youal lowedt hismant obeathi m upandst arvehi m, call
ed
him names.YesIknowbecausehet oldme.Whatt ypeofmot herareyou?
Granddad:Yoursonwast hebl acksheepoft hisf ami l
yIhadt owhiphi mi ntoast rai
ghtl i
ne.
Dlami ni:Thenwhydoyouwantt obur yabl acksheep?Hemi ghthavebeendi ff
er enttoyoubut
hewashi sfat her 'sson.
Makhul u:Youcor rupt edmyson!
Dlami ni:Wher ewasIt ocor rupthi m?Yout ur nedyourownsoni nt
oacr imi nalsodon' tyoudar e
pinitonme.
Makhul u:Youcondonedi t.
Dlami ni:WhowasIt ocondemni t?
Makhul u:Hi sf ather !
Dlami ni:Wel litwasal readyt ool at e,youdi daver ygoodj obatcor r
upt i
nghi m.Wel l
-done!Now
hei sgoneal lt hankst oyou.
Makhul u:I -
I..
Me:Don' tmumbl emakhul ut alk!Soyouknewt hatdadwas?Mom youal soknew?
Mom:OhbabyIam notpr oudoft hewayyourf at hergothi smoneybutIl ovedhi mf orwhohe
reall
ywas.Hewasahusbandandf athernotsomenot ori
ousgangst er.Hewasaf ami l
yman.
Granddad:That '
swhyyouwer enevergoodenoughf orhim.
Dlami ni:I fther ewasanyonewhowasgoodf orhi mi twast hi
swoman, shel ovedandsuppor ted
him.Ever yt
hi nghewentt hrough, shewast heref orhi m.
Me:Butmaal lthiswhi leIt houghtyoudi dn'tknowbutyouknew.
Mom:Iam sor rybabybutyourf athermademepr omisenott otel
lyou, especi allythegi rl
s.
Inodded, Itotal l
yagr eed.Theycoul dn'tfindout .
Me:Whatel sear eyouhi dingf rom me?
Mom:Not hingel sebaby.
Me:Sowhoi sNcaphayi ?
Mom:Yourf atherchangedhi ssur namet oDl ami niwhenhemethi srealf at her ,hef eltl
ikehe
didn'tbel ongwi tht heNcaphayi s.Whi chi syourgr anandgr anddad,wel ltheper sonyout hought
wasyourgr andf ather .
Iturnedt oDl ami ni .
Me:Howcomehenevert oldusaboutyou?
Dlami ni:Buthet oldmeaboutyou.IevennamedyouQhawe, ourhero.Someonewhowas
goingt oliftthi sf ami l
yup, seti tf reef r
om cr ime.Someonewhowi l
lalwaysst andupandpr ot
ect
thisfami lywi thhi sall.
Inodded.
Me:Sodoyouhaveaf ami ly?Ahome?Somewher ewegoi ngt oburydad.
Makhul u:Younotsayi ngwhatIt hinkyousayi ng.
Me:Iam, sodoyou?
Dlami ni:YesIdo, Ihaveawi feandt wodaught ers.
Me:Dot heyknowaboutdad?Us?
Dlami ni:You' l
lf i
ndoutwhenwegett her e.
Makhul u:Younotbei ngf orr ealr i
ghtnow.Thatmani sther easonyourf ather , mysoni sgone.
Dlami ni:Bl amemei fitwi l
lhel peaseyourconsci ence.
Makhul u:Hadyouhadnotcondonedhi sdar kwayshewoul dn'tbedeadr ightnow.I fyouwer ea
realfat her .
..
Dlami ni:HowwasIgoi ngt of atherhi m behi ndbar s?Hadyouhadnotl iedt omehewoul dn't
havet urnedt ocr i
met osur vive, Iwoul dhavebeent heretol oveandpr ovi def orhi m.
Makhul u:HowwasIgoi ngt ot ellyouwhenyouwer einandoutofpr i
son?Idi dn' twantmyson
tobel i
keyou.
Dlami ni:Butyethet urnedoutt obej ustlikeme.
Me:It hinkwedoneher esoshal lwe?
Iwast iredofl isteni ngt ot hem bl ameeachot herf ordad' sbadways.AndIdi dn'twantt ohear
howhegr ewup, hehust ledhi swayt ot he" top"t hat'sallIknewandwant edt oknow.Ther est
washi stor yandwewer egoi ngt oputi ttor estt hesamedayweputhi mt or est .Igotupand
i
ronedoutmycl ot heswi thmyhands.
Makhul u:YeYandi sawhodoyout hinkyouar e?
Me:Nodi sr espectmakhul ubutwewontbur ymyf atherwher ehedi dn'twantt obewhi lehewas
sti
llal ive.Ifhechangedhi ssur namet oDl ami ni thent hatmeanshebel ongst ot hem, hewant ed
tobeputt or estnextt othem.Thi swasn' thishomef oraver yl ongt imesohi sf athercanbur y
him, Iwanthi mt obur yhi m.Iam notgoi ngt of ightoverdad' sbodyandIdon' twantanyofyou
tofightoverhi m.Makhul upl easekhul ulai nhl i
ziyo, l
ethi sfat herbur yhi m please.
Dlami ni:Iam notsayi ngyoucan' tcomet ohi sf uner al,youcan.Youmor ethanwel comet o,you
hismot her .
Makhul u:You' llsendmet headdr essmakot i.
Mom:Of cosmama.
Makhul u:Thankyou, you'llhaveasaf etri
pt hen.
Me:Thankyoumakhul u.
ShenoddedsoIt ookmom' sbagandwal kedoutf irst.Mom andDl ami nifoll
owedaf terme.
Me:Wewi llfol l
owaf teryou.
Dlami ni:Nopr obl em Zi zi
.
Ifakedasmi let hengavehi m mom' sbag, wedi dn' thavespacef ormom.WhenMandl asawus
appr oachi ngt hem t heywentt ogeti nt hecar ,Igoti nont hedr iver'
sseatanddr oveout .Then
foll
owedaf terDl ami ni,Iexpl ainedt oZet huandOl wet huwhyt herewer eachangeofpl ans.I
didn'texpectt hem t ounder standbutt heydi d.
.
Wef inal l
ygott oDl ami ni'shomest ead.Ipar kedbehi ndhi mt henwegotof f,wewal kedt owards
us.
Him:Iam sor ryIwasneverapar tofyourl i
febutIdi dwant edt omaket hingsr ightwithyour
l
at ef atherandyou, mygr andchi l
d.OZi ziabahl e.
Wenodded.
Him:Iam sor ryf ort hechanget hatIam br i
ngi ngi nt oyourl ivesatt hisdiffi
cultt i
me, i
fyou
feelingal ittleover whel medIwi l
l under standbutj ustknowt hatwear eaf ami lythatyourf ather
alwayswant ed.Hewant edt obei nt r
oducedandf oryout obei nt r
oducedt ot hispar tofyour
fami lybutduet oci rcumst ancesweal lknowhecan' tbeher ewi thus.
Agai nwenodded.
Him:ComeI '
llint roduceyout oyouraunt sandcousi ns.
Olwet hu:Howmanycousi nsdowehave?
Him:OhLwet huwenotaver ybi gf ami l
y, i
tsj ustaf ewoft hem.
Heopenedt hedoorandwenti nf i
rst ,wef oll
owedaf terhim.Aol dwoman, hiswi femaybest ood
upandwal kedt owar dsus.
Her :Ar et heset hem?
Him:Thesear et hem Mzoxol o'schi ldrenandwi fe.
Her :Ohmygoodnesst heysool dandbeaut iful, Iam sur eMzoxol owaspr oudofhi schi ldr
en.
Makot iar eyouwel l
?
Mama:Iam goodmama, unj aniwena?
Her :Myhear ti sbr okenaboutwhathappenedt omysonbutt heLor dknowswhyhet ookhi m,
wecan' tcompl ai n.
Mama:Ewemamaevent houghi tshar dwehavet oacceptt hathei sgone.
Her :EweMakot ibutbest r ongf oryourchi ldr en, bahl eyuh.
Mama:Thankyou.
Her :Wher ear emymanner s?Si tdownpl ease, canIgetyouanyt hing?
Me:Not hanksmama.
Wesatdown.
Her :Iam yourgr andmot her ,hemi ghthavenotbeenmybi ologi calsonbuthewasmysonandI
l
ovedhi m.Icanst il
lr emembert hedayhef i
rstcamei ntomyhouse, youngandhandsome.A
char merl ikehi sf ather ,ohMzoxol o.
Wesmi l
ed.
Her :Hewasf ul lofr espectandl ove, Icouldn' thel pbutf al
linl ovewi thhim.Ohsuchabeaut if
ul
soul .Heusedt ovi si tmeandhenevercameempt yhanded, eveni fitwasj ustast i
cksweetnj e.
Dlami ni:Ohmywi fecant al kf ordays, l
etmei ntroduceyou.
Her :Yi madon' tt ellme, t
hat 'sQhawe.
Shepoi nt edt ome.
Her :Hayisukamanngat hi nguMzoxol o, hel ookedj ustl ikeyouwhenIf irstsawhi m.Bef orehe
movedt oCapet own.
Ismi led, whatawar m andl ovingwoman.
Dlami ni:Andshei sn' texagger at i
ng, her eall
yl ookedl ikeyou.Thi si sOl wet huandt hat '
sZet hu.
Theot heryounggi rlisQhawe' swi fe,Phumza.Yourf athercoul dn'tshutupaboutyou, hel oved
youdear l
y.
Wesmi led.
Dlami ni:Idi dn' tgett heyoungman' snameear lier,mymi ndwasal lovert hepl acesopl ease
excuseme.
Me:Thi si sMandl amyf riend.
Dlami ni:OhMandl ai t
sapl easur emeet i
ngyou, Icoul dn'tbemor ehappi er.Final lyIgott omeet
mygr andchi l
dren, Ijustknewyouf rom t hepi ctur esyourf atherusedt osendt omewhi leIwas
away.
Me:Wehappyt oknowyout oo.
Dlami ni:Iknow.Wher ear eyourdaught ers?
MaDl ami ni:Theyar ecooki ngi nt heki tchen, Zol ekayourbr other'schi ldr
enar eher e!
"Finally!",twomat uredl adi eswal kedi nt ot hesi tti
ngr oom.
Dar ky:Yuhabasebadal a!Iam yourdabsZol ekakemna.
Lightski nned:AndIam Thembel a, youl ooksool dguysngekecomeher e.
Theyopenedt hei rar msf orus, wei ntroducedour sel vesonebyone.Theycal ledi nt hewhol e
fami l
yandt heygr eet eduswar ml y, t
heywer equi tedi fferentf r
om t heot hersi deofdad' sf ami l
y.
Theywer ehappyt omeetus, theywer egenui nel yhappyt hatwecoul devenf eeli tinourhear t
s.
Wewer er eal lywel comeher eandt hatmademeal ittl
eoverwhel med.
Anywaymom wast akent oar oom wher eshecoul dcont inuemour ningf orherhusband, back
ont hemat tressf orher .Wewer et oldoursl eepi ngar rangement s,PhumzaandIwer est i
ll
separ ated.Shewasshar ingwi ththeot hergi rl
sandIwasshar ingar oom wi t
hMandl aand
Xol i
sile,mycousi nwhowasar oundmyage.Dl ami niandanot herol dman( myuncl e)tookust o
ahut , hewant edt oi ntroduceust ot heirancest or s.Heal soi ntroduceddadbutasdeceased.
Aftert hatl ittl
ei ntroduct ionwewer eser vedoursupper ,aftereat ingmyt woaunt st ookt he
dishest ot heki t
chenandwashedt hem r ightaway.Atl eastPhumzacoul dr est .At8weal lwent
tobed, atl eastt hispl acewasal i
ttledi sadvant aged.Theyhadel ectricit
yandawat ert api nt he
yardi ncludi ngabi ggr eenwat ert ank.
.
.
Thenextcoupl eofdayswewer eupanddownpr epar ingf ordad' sf uner al,thoughIwas
planni ngi titst il
lhasn' tr eallysunki nthathewasgone.I tjustf eltlikehewasbacki nCapet own
andwewer egoi ngt oseehi m whenwegobackt her e, crazyIknowbuti thappens.
.
Friday. .
.
Iwokeupear lyandwentt owher ePhumzawassl eepi ng.Iknockedont hedoorandwai ted,
aftersomet imet hedooropened.
Zet hu:Wavel elwaumt wanawabant unguwe, whatdoyouwant ?
Me:I sshest i
llsleepi ng?
Her :Yeahandi thiyourbunhast ogr ow?Whatdoyouwant ?
Phumzadi dn' treal lydoanychor esher e, shewasj ustt ol dt orestIguessgr anddadDl ami nitold
them aboutt hel i
ttlear gumenthewal kedi natsoever yoneki ndofknewshewasexpect ing.
Ther efor eshewast reat edl ikeapr i
ncess, shewasevencompl ainingaboutt hegoodt reatment .
Shewant edt obebusyl ikeever yoneel se.
Me:Ineedwat ert ohaveabat handhert oironmycl ot hes.Wemeet ingLubanzii nt own, hewi ll
bet her einahour .Andweal sohavet ogodr essdad.
Her :OhyeseyIam notgoi ngwi t
hyouguys.
Me:AndOl wet hu?
Her :Nowecan' tseehi ml i
ket hat, wej ustcan' tsor ry.
Me:OkayIguessmom andIwi llbef i
ne.
Her :Thanks.I 'l
lwakeherupf oryou.
Me:Pl easedoIhaveal ott odot oday.
Shenoddedandl etmei n.Shewokeherupf ormet hengoti nbed.
Me:Mor ni ngmyl ove.
Phumi :Mor ni
ng.
Shest retchedandyawnedt hengotoutofbed.
Her :Doyouwantsomet hing?
Shet ookhercl ot hesandwor et hem.
Me:Yeahwar m wat erandmycl ot hes.
Her :Okay.
Me:Sor r
yf orwaki ngyouup.
Her :Itsf i
ne, I
'
llgetyouwat erandi ronyourcl othesf oryou.
Me:Thankyoust handwasam butdoyouknowwhatIwantmor e?
Her :What ?
Itookherhandsandpul ledhert ome.
Her :ButIhaven' tbr ushedmyt eethyet .
Me:Idon' tcar e, Ihaven' tbr ushedmi neeither .
Iwr appedherar msar oundmywai stthencuppedherf ace.Weshar edaki ss,brokei taft
er
somet ime.
Me:Il oveyou.
Her :Iloveyout oo.
Me:Andt hankyouf ort oler ati
ngme, Iknowi tsnoteasybutyouputupwi thmeanyway.
Her :IfIdon' tputupwi thyout henwhowi ll
?
Ismi led.
Me:Butt hankyouanyway, whenwegetoutofher eI '
ll t
reatyou.
Her :Youwi l
l?
Me:Uhuh!
Shesmi ledandki ssedmychi n.
Her :Okayl etmegogetyouwat ersoyoucanhaveabat h.
Me:Thankyoubabe.
Sheunwr appedherar msf rom meandpul ledmeoutwi t
hher.
.
Afterhavi ngabat hMandl aandIwentt ogetont hecart hendr ovet otown.Wepar kedwher eit
woul dbeeasyf orLubanzi tospotus.Aboutahourl at erwesawhi scardr i
vingin, Mandl a
calledhi mt otel lhi m wher ewewer et henwegotof ft hecarassoonashepar kednextt ous.He
gotof ft oo.
Luba:Gent s.
Me:Shoboy.
Weshoul derbumped.
Luba:Howar eyou?
Mandl a:Gr eatboyevent houghwedon' tr
eal lysl eep.
Luba:Why?
Me:Webusymaney.Mandl awi l
ldr i
vewi thyoune?
Luba:Sho.
Wegotbacki nourcar sanddr ovebackhome.Wegott herejustint imef orbr eakfast,Phumza
servedus.Af tereat ingIt ookt hedi shest ot heki tchent henIwentt ogr anddadandmom, we
fi
nishedt hepr ogr ammet hent ookdad' sclot hesanddr ovetotown.Whi legranddadwentt o
printthepr ogrammewewentt ot hef uneral par lourt odr essdad.Seei nghi m agai nwas
disturbingbutasamanIhadt obest r
ong.Af teral loft hatwet ookhi m homewi thus.Whenwe
gothomeever yonewasal l
owedt oseehi m, i
twasasadmomentf orever yone.Af terseeinghim
Ijustwentt obed, i
tr eallyhi tmet hathewasgoneandnotcomi ngback.Abi tlatertherewas
hismemor ialser vice, wher eever yoneandanyonewasal l
owedt osayat hingort woabouthi m.
.
Thef ol l
owi ngdaywewokeupear l
yt ohaveabat handgetdr essed.Af tergettingdr essedwe
wentt oseedadonel astt imet henwewentt ot het entandhi sser vicebegan.Iwontgoi nto
detailabouti t,itwasj ustasaddayf ormeandmysi blings.Not hingabouti twasbeaut i
ful,I
saidaf ewwor dsaboutt heki ndofmanhewasandt hankedhi mf orgr oomi ngmei ntothisman
thatIam today.Fi
nal
lywehadtoputhi
m athisl
astrest
ingplace,
thatwasthemostdi f
ficul
t
part.Thatmomentyoureali
set
hattheper
sonisreall
ygoneandnot hi
ngwasgoi ngtobringhim
back,nottheamountoftear
swecried,
notthehurtwefelti
nourhearts.Not
hing,wejusthadto
acceptitandmoveon.Itwasn'
tgoi
ngtobeeasybutwej usthadto.

36
Yandisa:
Thedayaf tert hef uner al .
..
Wewokeupar ound3h00am t ohaveabat handgetr eadyt odr ivebackt oCapet own, our
purposef orcomi ngt ot heECwasf ulfil
lednowi twast imet omoveon.Ihadt ogobackt owor k,
Olwethuhadschool andZet hual sohadt ogobackt owor k.Af terget tingdr essedwewentt o
l
oadourbagsi nthecar .
MaDl ami ni:Don' tyouwantt ohavebr eakf ast ?
Me:Wewi l
ljustbuysomet hingont her oadmaf ornowwenothungr y.
MaDl ami ni:Okay.Don' tbest r
anger snow, thisi salsoyourhome.
Me:Wewon' tmakhul u, wewi l
l visityousoon.
MaDl ami ni:Pr omi se?
Me:Ipr omi semakhul u.
Shet ookmyhandsandki ssedt hem t henweshar edahug.
Dlami ni:Zi zicanwet al k?
Me:Sur e.
Webr oket hehug, makhul uwentt ooZet huwhower est il
li nsidet hehouse.
Dlami ni:Thef irstcoupl eofweekswi l
lbeabi thar dbecauseofal lthesechanges, you'llbethe
manoft hehousenow.Youwontonl yhaveyourwi fet ot akecar eofbutyourmot herand
sibli
ngs, don' tdesser tt hem.Theywi llneedaf atherfi
gur eandyou' llbet hat,you'llbeaf ather
mor et hanabr other .( Inodded)Youi nchar geofever ythi ngnow, yourf ather'
sbusi nesses, his
house. ..bewi seson.Bewi se,whent hegoi ngget stoughdon' ttur nt ocr i
mef oral itt
lehelpt urn
tous, yourf ami ly.Cal lmei fyouneedanyt hing, Iam onl yaphonecal laway.I fyoudot urnto
crimej ustknowt hatyouwi l
lhavemet odealwi thandIam noteasyt odealwi t
h, itwontbef un.
Youwi llfaceser iousconsequences.
Ilaughed.
Me:I '
llbei ncont actkhehl e.
Him:Goodbecausenomancaneverst andononel eg, weneedourf ami ly.Weneedsuppor t
too,ext rahel p.
Inodded.
Him:Onemor et hing, t herei sst i
llal ott obedonebackher e.West i
llhavet odoal it
tl
ewel come
ceremonyf ort het hreeofyou, yourf at heral soment i
onedsomet hingaboutat r
adi ti
onal
weddi ng.
Me:Ohyesbutcanweputi tonhol df oral i
ttl
ewhi l
e?
Him:I thast obedonesonbutokaywecanputi tonhol dunt ilyouhaveever ythingf i
guredout .
Me:Thankyou.
Him:You' l
lt akecar eofyourwi fe.
Me:Iwi lltamkhul u.
Him:Heywat chi t!Iam nott hatol d.
Weshar edal augh.
Him:Onemor et hing, t hesear eal soyoursi blingscal lthem t ocheckont hem.Youshoul dhave
Xolisi
le'snumber .
Me:Idool dmandon' twor rywef ami l
ysowewi llbeincont actal mostever yday.
Him:That '
st hewayf ami l
yi skenyana, alwayst heref oreachot her.
Inodded.
Him:Thatwi l
lbeal lkenyana, haveasaf et ri
p.Becar ef ulaphaont her oad.
Me:Al rightZi zithankyou.
Him:Kubongemna, boyst hankyouman.( refer r
ingt oMandl aandLubanzi )
Mandl a:Wear et hegr at eful ones, youwel comeduswi thsuchl oveandwar mt h.
Dlami ni:That '
showweZi zinat ural l
yar e,lovingandf riendl y.
Ismi l
ed, thismanwassomuchl ikehi ssont hough.Ever yt hingabouthi m,hismodest y,theway
hespoke, hiswi sdom andhi smeani ngf ul advices.I tslikeIlostaf atherbutgotanot herone.
AnywayIwentt ogett hel adies, i
twast i
mef orust ol eavenow.Thewhol ef ami l
ycameoutt o
wishusasaf ej our neyandt osayt hei rfar ewel l
s, i
twashar dsayingbyet ot hem.I twasr eall
y
greatbei ngher e, par toft hisl ovingf ami ly.GoshIwasgoi ngt omi ssthem.
DabsZol eka: Cal luswhenyouar rivei nCapet own.
Mom:Wewi ll
.
DabsThembel a:Takecar eofyour selvesne?
Us:Wewi l
lthankyou.
Them:Wel oveyou.
Us:Wel oveyout oo.
Weshar edourl asthugst henIopenedt hef rontpassengerdoorf ormyl ady, shegotonandI
closed.Iopenedf ormom, shegotont henIcl osedandwentt ogetont hedr iver'sside.Ol wethu
andZet huwer edr i
vingwi thMandl aandLubanzi .Wesl owlydr oveoutoft heyar d,hoot edonce
thendr oveof f.West artedatt hegar aget of il
lthef ueltankandgetsomebi test ohel pkeepme
awaket henwedr oveoutandt oCapet own.
.
Afteraver ylongdr ivewi t
hcount l
essst opswef inallydr oveintoCapet own, itwasahot
Tuesdaymor ning( webookedi nt oaB&Bonourwayback, Iwast iredofdr iving).Wedr oveto
ourhoodt henhouse.Igotof ftounl ockandopent hegat ethenwentbacki nt hecaranddr ove
usin.Ipar kedj ustout si det hegar aget henwegotof f,whi l
emom wentt ounl ockt hedoorIof f
l
oadedoutbagsandt ookt hem i n.
Mom:I twontbet hesamewi thouthi m.
Shewasl ooki ngatt hei ranni versar ypi ctur es,theyhadt hei
rownshr ineint hel ounge.If ound
thelovet hattheyshar edver ysweetandst rong.
Me:Yeahbutwewi l
lgetusedt onothavi nghi m around.
Shesni f
fedandputdownt hepi ct ure.
Me:Imi sshi mt ooma.
Her:Iknowbaby.
Sheki ssedmycheek.
Phumza:Woul dyoul i
kesomet eaorcof fee?
Mom:NobabyI '
lljustgol iedown.
Wenoddedandl ookedatherast hewal kedt hrought hepassage.
Me:Shewi l
lbeokay.
Phumza:Whataboutyou?
Me:I '
llbegoodt oo.
Shenodded.
Me:Wher eisZet huandOl wet huna?Idon' tli
kelent oyakhewi t
hMandl a,hei smybestf ri
end.
Shel aughed.
Her:Hayiwet hul etOl wet hubef oraf ewdays, Mandl amakeshersmi leandl aughwebot h
knowt hatsheneedst hat .
Me:Icanmakeherl aughandsmi let oo.
Her:Andwhi l
eyoubusymaki ngherl aughandsmi lewhowi l
lbemaki ngmesmi leandl augh?
Me:Yousoj eal oust hough.
Her:NoIam not ,Ijustl oveyourat tent i
onal ltomysel f.
Ismi l
edandpul l
edhert oourbedr oom.Wegotont hebedandl ai
donourbacks, l
ooki ngatthe
ceil
ing.
Me:Imi ssedt hi s.
Shel ookedatme.
Her:Imi ssedi tt oo.
Weshar edashor tkisst hencuddl edandf ellasleep.
.
IwokeupwhenIhear dnoi sescomi ngf rom t hel ounge, Igotoffbedandwentt ocheck.
Olwet huandZet huwer ejustar r
iving, Ilookedatmywr istwat ch.
Me:Wher ewer eyouf ort hewhol e3hour s?
Olwet hu:Hayiwet hubhut iwej ustwentt ot hebeach.
Zethu:Weneededal it
t l
ef reshai rbef or ecomi ngher e.
Me:Okaygi r
lsyoucangot oyourr ooms.
Theynoddedandwentt ot hei rrooms.Iwentt omom' sr oom, Iknockedt henwal kedi n.Shewas
sit
ti
ngonherbum andcr ying, Iwentt osi tnextt oherandj usthuggedher .
Whenshewascal m shepul ledoutofmyhug, shewi pedhereyes.
Her:Whatdi dyouwant ?
Me:PhumzaandIneedt ogobackt ot hef lat
.
Shenodded.
Me:Butwewi l
lbeback, It hinkwewi l
l bemovi ngbackher eforaf ewmont hs.
Her:Youdon' thavet omovebackher ewecanmanage.
Me:Itsnotupf ordi scussi onmama.Weneedt obet oget herdur ingthi sti
me
Her:Yourf at
herwoul dn'twantyout oputyourl if
eonhol dj ustbecauseoft his.
Me:Iam notmama.
Her:Thendon' tmovebacki n.
Me:Justf oracoupl eofdayskemama.
Her:Aweek.
Me:Okay.
Her:Yourf at
her 'slawyercal led, Itol dhi mt hathecoul dcomet omor roweveni ng.
Me:Okaynopr obl em then.
Her:Baby.
Me:Ma?
Her:Yourf at
heral soownedacarwor kshop/ panel beat er s.
Me:Ohl etmeguessi twasn' tj ustanor malpanelbeat erwor kshopr ight?
Her:Thedr ugbusi nesswasn' tbr ingingi nmuch.
Me:OhmyGod!
Her:Don' tjudgeyourf ather ,hedi dal loft hissoyoucoul dbecomet heper sonyouar etoday.
Me:Iam notj udgi nghi m butmamaIaskedyoukahl ei ftherewer eanymor esecr etsandyou
saidno.
Her:Youdi dn'thonest l
yexpectmet odi scussyourf ather 'sbusyi nfrontofhi sf amily.
Me:Itsl i
keIdon' tknowwhodadi sanymor e.
Her:Youknowexact lywhoyourf at herwasdon' tletthi scl oudyourj udgment .
Me:OkayIshoul dpr obabl ygot ot hebart ocheckonbusi nessl aterbutf ornowIneedt ohavea
bathandchanget osomet hi ngcl ean.
ShenoddedsoIgotupandwal kedout .Iwentt owakePhumzaupt hent ookourbagandwe
wentt oourcar .Wegoti nandIdr oveoutt hent oourapar tment .
.
Whenwegott her eIpar kedt hengotof f,Itookourbagandl ockedt hecart henwentupt oour
room.Whenwegott hereIunl ockedt henwewenti n,Phumzawentst rai
ghtf orthewi ndows
whileIwentt oputourbagdown.Iundr essedt henwentt ohaveaqui ckshower ,af
ter
shower ingIwentbackt oourbedr oom.Shewasont hebedl yingdown.
Me:I'llbegoi ngoutf oraf ewhour s.
Her:Wher eareyougoi ng?
Me:Tocheckondad' sbar .
Shenodded.
Her:Sowhatar eyougoi ngt owear ?
Iopenedt hecl osett hent ookoutbl ackj eansandagr eyt -shirt.
Me:These.
Shet ookt hem andwal kedout .Ilot i
onedmybodyt henwor emyboxer s,Isatdownont hebed
andt ookmyphone.Idi alledChant elle'snumber ,shepi ckedupal mosti mmedi atel
y.
Her:Ithoughtyouwer elying.
Me:I'mt ryingt obeabet terman.
Her:Forher ?
Me:Iwoul dliket okeepmywi feoutofi t.
Her:Soyouback?
Me:Yeahandwehavet ot al kaboutQj uni or,Iwantt obeapar tofhisl i
fe.Iwanthi mt oknow
thathehasaf at herandt hatf atheri sme.
Her:Soyougoi ngt ointroducehi mt oyourwi feandf ami ly?
Me:No, notr ightnow.Ican' taf f
ordt oupsether .
Her :Sohewi llbeasecr et?
Me:No, wel lf ornow.
Her :Mci m.
Me:Let smeetup.
Her :Now?
Me:Ar eyoubusy?
Her :NoIam athome.
Me:Soyoudon' tmi ndmeet ingupwi thme?
Phumzawal kedi nandputmycl othesont hebedt hensatont hebed.
Her :Okay.
Me:I 'l
ltellyout het imeandpl ace.
Her :What ever .
Idr oppedt hecal lt
hengotupandwor ethecl othes.
Her :Ithoughtyousai dyouwer egoi ngt oyourf ather'
sbar .
Me:Iam.
Her :Hmmm
Me:Youshoul dcal lyourdoct ort omakeanappoi ntmentwi t
hher .
Her :ButIam f i
neandt heyar efine.
Me:Wehavet obesur est handwasam.
Her :Okay.
Me:Maket heappoi ntmentf ort omor r
ow.
Her :OkayI 'llcal lheraf t
ershower ing.
Me:Okay.
Iwor emyr edNi keai rmaxki cks.
Me:I 'l
lbebackne?
Her :Okay.
Me:Il oveyou.
Her :Iloveyout oo.
Weshar edaki sst henIt ookmyphoneandwal l
et.
Me:I 'mt akingyouonadat ewhenIcomebacksogetr eady.
Her :Ohal right .
Ibabyki ssedhert henwal kedout .Itookabot t
leofwat erf r
om thef r
idgethenwentdownst ai
rs
tomycar ,Iunl ockedandgoton.Idr ovet ot hecarwashkuqal atogeti tcl
eanedup,Iwasst i
ll
wai ti
ngIt ext edChant ellet el
lingherwher ewewer emeet ingandt obringmysonwi t
hher.When
theguyswer edonewashi ngt hecarIpai dthedr ovet othebeach.
.
WhenIgott her eIpar kedt henIcal l
edChant ell
et otellherwher eIwaspar ked,af
terabout10
mi nutesshepar kednextt omet hengotof f.Shewal kedovert othepassengersideandopened
thedoorf orboy, hegotof f.Igotof ftoo.
Me:Heyguys.
Chant ell
e: Hey.
Weshar edashor thug.
Me:Looki ngbeaut iful asal ways.
Her :Thankyouyoul ooki nggoodyour self
.
Me:YouknowmeIal wayst ryt oimpr ess.
Her :Youal r eadyhavemyhear tsononeedt otryt oimpr essme.
Me:Let ssett hi ngsst raightChant el l
e,thisisaboutoursonnotus.
Her :Whendi dyoubecomet hi sser i
ousper son?Iwasonl yjoki
ng.
Ilookedather ,IknewChant ellesowel lsoIknewwhenshewasj oki
ngandwhenshewas
serious.Andshewasn' tjoking.
Me:Soyougoi ngt oi nt roduceus?
Her :Sure.
Shel if
tedhi m upandputhi m ont hecarr oof .
Her :Qhawer ememberwhenIsai donedayyou' llgettomeetyourf ather?(henodded)thi
sis
him andhi snamei sal soQhawebutyoucancal lhim dad.
Him:Ar ewegoi ngt olivewi thhi m?
Me:Noson. .
Her:Dadi smar r
iedt oanot herwomansohecan' tl
ivewi thmommyandQhawe.
Me:Buti tdoesn' tmeant hatIwontseeyouever yday.
Her:You' llgett obondandbui ldar elati
onshi p.
Me:Wewi llhavef un.
Her:Andhewi llloveyou.
Me:Mor et hananyt hingi nt hiswor ld.
Henodded.
Me:Sowi llyougi vemeachancet obeyourf ather?
Him:Yeah.
Ismi l
ed.
Me:Thankyou.
Her:Gi vedaddyahug.
Heopenedhi sar msandweshar edahug.
"Youdi dn' thavet ocr yyouknow" , Ilaughedandbr oket hehug.
Me:HayisukaIwasn' tcrying.
Shel aughedt oo.
Me:Thankyouf ornotabor tinghi m.
Her:Iwaski ndofwor ri
edyouwoul dn'tlovehi m.
Me:WasIt hatmuchofabadass?
Her:Youhavenoi dea.
Me:I '
m sor ryChant elle.IknowIhur tyou, Idi
dn' ttr
eatyousowel l
.Anditskindofunfairf
oryou
toknowt hatIam wi thanot herwoman, t
hatIam mar ri
edtoanot her.
Her:Iwi shyouwer eliket hiswi t
hmet oo, Iwishyoul ovedandr espectedmeasmuchasyou
l
oveandr espectyourwi fe.
Me:Idi dl oveyou, Ist i
lldo.
Her:What ever !Let sgogeti cecr eam.
Shet ookQhaweandputherdown.
Me:Chant elle...
Her:Yes?
Me:I '
mr eal l
ysor ry.
Her:Wenother eforusbutoursonr ight?
Shewal kedawayandt owar dsar est aurant .Gosh!If ollowedaf tert
hem, wegotat abl
eandsat
down.Wel ookedt hrought hemenusandpl acedouror der s,Iorderedsomet hingl
ightbecauseI
wasst i
llgoi ngoutwi thmywi f
e.
.
Aftereat ingIset tl
edt hebi l
l thenwegotup.
Her:Thankyout hiswasgr eat .
Me:YeahIhadf unt oo.Whataboutyouboyboy?
Inodded.Lookedl ikehewasn' tmuchofat alker,hewasqui etthroughoutlunch.Heonl y
noddedorshookhi sheadwhenspokent o.
Her:Sowhenar eyougoi ngbackt owor k?
Me:OnMondaymaybe.Whydoyouask?
Her:Justaski ng.Canyoubel ievet hatwomant oldmet ogetaj ob?
Me:Whatar eyouwai tingf orvel e?Youhavecompl etedyourdegr eenow, youhaveasont o
takecar eof .Andyourf atheri sgoneandsoi shi s"business" .Whatwi l
lyouliveon?
Her:Itsonl ybeenaweekIwasst illgoi ngt othinkabouti t.
Ichuckl edandshookmyhead.
Me:I tsbeenayearsi nceyoucompl etedyourdegr eeChant elle.
Her:Iknow, Ij ustneededsomet i
met orel axmymi nd.
Me:That 'swhatyousai dwhenyout ookagapyear .
Her:Iwaspr egnanthel lo!
Me:Ohyes.( Il ookedatmywr istwat ch)Ishoul dpr obablygetgoi ng.
Her:Wi feyi swai ti
ngf oryouathome?
Me:YeahIpr omi sedt ot akeheronadat e.
Shechuckl ed.
Her :Youanddat es?
Me:Peopl echange.
Her :YoumeanPhumzachangedyou.
Me:Yousur eyouwantt ogot her e?
Her :Of cosnot .(wegott ot hepar kinglot )Wel lwehadf un, t
hankyou.
Me:Nosweat .
Sheopenedt hedoorf orQj uni or ,hegoti naf terhuggi ngmeandcl osedt henshewentt oher
side.
Me:Soyouj ustgoi ngt ol eavemeher e?Nohug?Nogoodbye?
Her :ByeYandi sa.
Me:ComeonEl l
e!Hugnyana?
Shesmi l
ed.
Her :ByeYandi sa.
Iyankedmyhandandshel aughedt hengoti nt hecar .Shest art
edt heengi neanddr oveof f
.I
goti nmycart ooanddr ovet ot hebarf ir
st.
.
.
Phumza:
Igotoutoft hebat htubandwr appedat owelar oundmybody.Idr ai nedt hewat erandwashed
thet ubt henwentt othebedr oom.It ookof fthet owelandst oodi nf rontoft hemi r
rorlooki
ngf or
changesonmybody, Iwasget ti
ngst retchmar ksonmyboobs.Jeez!Il otionedmybodyf ast
thenl ookedf orsomet hingt owear ,Itookoutashor tblankandwhi test r
ipedhi ghwaistskirt
andwhi t
el acycr opt op.Iwant edt olookgoodf ormyman, gottaliveupt ohi sprefer
encesso
hewontcheckoutot herwomen.Iwentt oiront heskir tthenwor et hecl othes,Iputonbr ownish
heel sthensatdownt odomymakeupandhai r.Thenaf terIpackedasmal lbagandt ooka
l
ightbr owncar digan.Iwentt ot hel ounget owai tformyman.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Aftermy" little"chatwi ththegent satt hebarIdr ovehomeget t
ingPhumzaar oseatt hefl
ori
st
fi
rst.
.
Igott ot heapar tmentandgotof fthenwentupt oourr oom.Iknockedont hedoorandshe
openedaf t
eraf ewseconds.Shewasl ookingbeaut i
ful aseversoyoucanj ustimaginethe
smi leonmyf acewhenIsawher .
Me:Formybeaut i
fulwi f
e.
Shesmi l
edandt ooki t.
Her :Thankyou.
Shepeckedmyl ips.
Me:Mr sDlami ni!Damn!Youl ooki nghot .
Her :Gladt ohavet akenyourbr eat haway.
Me:I fonl yIcoul dhaveyouf ordi nner.
Shegi ggledandhi tmychest .
Her :Stopbei ngsi l
ly.
Me:Ser iousyoul ooksodel icious.
Ikissedherl ips.
Me:Gi vemeaf ewmi nutest ochangei ntosomet hingappr opr i
ate.
ShenoddedsoIwentt ochangei ntoawhi tet -shi r
t,acar amell eat herj acketandbl ackNike
kicks.Thenwentbackt ot hel ounge.
Me:Soshal lwe?
Shehookedherar mt omi ne, Iki ssedhercheekandwewal kedout .

37
Phumza:
Dinnerwasni
cebuti
tswhathappenedaf
terdi
nnert
hatj
ustbl
ewmymi
ndaway,
Yandi
sawas
alwaysf ullofsur prisesandt hat '
swhatexci tedmet hemostaboutouri ntimacy.Iwokeupwi t
h
asor ebody, Ihadt hisur gencyt opeesoIgotoutofbedandwentt opeet hengotbacki nbed.
Hewr appedhi sar msar oundmesoIputmyheadonhi schest .Het ookhi sphoneandt ook
picturesoft hebot hofus.Imustsaywemadeaver ybeaut if
ulcoupl e#bl owi ngourownhor n.
Me:Whatar eyoudoi ng?
Him:Capt ur i
ngt hemoment .
Me:Whenmyhai rist hismessy?
Him:Il oveyouwi thyourmessyhai r.
Heki ssedmyf orehead, Icoul dn'thel pbutsmi l
e.Howwasi tpossi bl eforonet olovesomeone
sohar d?
Him:Whatt imei st hedoct or'
sappoi ntment ?
Me:At12.
Him:Ohsowest i
llhavet i
me.
Me:Ti mef orwhat ?
Heputhi sphoneaway.
Him:Pr e- br eakf ast .
Hef lippedusoversohecoul dbeont op.Igi ggledasheki ssedmyneck, tracinghi stongueal l
thewaydownt omybel lybut tont henf airy.Hepushedmyl egsapar tthenmuf fedme, Ihel dhis
headandpushedi tback.Hi m bei ngdownt her ejustf eltsowei rd,Icannevergetusedt ot his.
Him:Rel ax.
Hesl i
ppedhi sf i
nger sbet weenmyf i
nger sthenhewentbackdownonmeandmuf fedme
slowl y,Icoul dn' thel pbutmoan.I tf eltgoodi nanunexpl ainabl eway.
"Yandi sa" , Isai di nasof ttone.Iwant edhi m deeper ,Iwant edhi mr eal l
ybad.JustwhenIwas
aboutt ohavemyor gasm hest oppedandcameupt okissmyl ipswhi l
ei nser ti
nghi msel fint o
myf airy.Het hrust edi n, out ,deeperandi nci rcl
eshi t
tingal lmyvi rginwal ls.Hewasgi vingi tt o
mer eallysl owanddeep, teasi ngmeher eandt her e.Themoanst hatf i
lledt heroom wer e
massi veandcr azy, theycamef rom t hebot hofus.
.
Afteroursessi onhel i
ftedmeupandcar riedmet ot hebat hr oom.Whenwegott othebat hroom
heputmedownandr anusabubbl ebat h,thet ubwasbi genoughf ort hebot hofussowegot
i
n.Wi thmebet weenhi sl egs, heki ssedmyneckt hent ookt het owelandwashedmybody.
Me:Icangetusedt othi s.
Him:Don' tevent hinkabouti t.
Me:Buti tssodi ffer entandr omant ic.
Hechuckl ed.
Him:Womenf indanyt hingr omant ic.
Me:Iam notl ikeot herwomen.
Him:Youcansayt hatagai n, youar emyMr sDl ami niandyouver yspeci al.
Ismi ledandki ssedhi sar m.
Him:Thankyouf orbei ngmywi f
e.Iknowwebot hhadnochoi cebutever yt hingiswor kingout
thewaywel eastexpect edt hem t owor k, webot hlear nthowt ol oveandbel oved.Tot rustand
bet rust ed.
Me:YouknowwhenIcameher e,whenIgoti ntot hismar ri
ageIexpect edt hewor st.Ithought
youwer egoi ngt oabusemeandIwasr ight ,youmademef allinlovewi thyou.Youmadeand
youcont inuet omakemyhear tandmi ndwor kover ti
mej ustt hinkingaboutyou.Fant asizing
aboutyouandonl yyou.Iam madl yi nlovewi thyouQhawe.
Him:Iam madl yi nlovewi thyout ooMr sDl ami ni.
Ilookedathi m, weshar edashor tki sst henwecont i
nuedt alkingaboutourst upidexpect at ions
befor eget tingi nt ot hismar r
iage.
>>>
Wewal kedi ntoDrNhl apho' sof fi
cehandi nhand.Shesmi l
edandgotupf rom herseatwhen
shesawus.ShewassweetyenashamebutIdi dn'tlikebei ngher e, Ihat edhospi tal
s.Ihat edal l
thet hingsIhadt odo, bl oodpr essur et ests, bloodt est snjeal lt hoset est s.
Her:Myf avour i
tepat ient( Ifakedasmi le)howar eyoudoi ngt oday?
Igavehermyf i
le, shet ooki t.
Me:I 'm donej ustf ine.
Her :Howaboutyousi r?Pl easesi tdown.
Shewentt ocl oset hedoort hensatdownonherchai racrossus.
Him:Iam doi ngf i
net oo.
Her :That '
sgoodt ohear .( sheopenedmyf il
e)Ar eyoust i
ckingt oourpl an?
Me:It ry.
Him:Shei sn'tt het ypet hatl ovessi t
tingdownanddoi ngnot hing, shel ovesbei ngbusy.
Ilookedathi m.
Him:Butshei st rying.
Hepat tedmyt hi gh.
Her :Asl ongasshei snotdoi nganyheavychor es.
Me:Of cosIam not , Ial sowantt hesebabi esal ive.
Shenodded.
Her :Icanseeyoumai ntai ningyourbl oodpr essur esoyouusi ngt hemedi cat i
onIgavet oyou?
That 'sanot hert hingIhat ed, t
hedamnpi ll
sJesusChr ist
!
Me:Iam al sokeepi ngaheal t
hydi et.
Her :Andexer cises?
Him:Lot soft hem.
Ipinchedhi sthi gh, hequi cklyhel dmyhandandshookhi shead.
Her :OkayIdon' tneedt oheart hedet ails.
Wel aughed, uyaphaphauYandi saman.
Her :Asl ongasshei skeepi ngf itandheal thy, makesmyj obr eallyeasy.
Me:Hedoesmakesur et hatIkeepf it.
Hesmi ledandl ookedatme.Iki ssedhi sshoul dert henlookedatt hedoct or.Shesmi ledshyly.
Her :OhmyGodl et sj ustgett hisoveranddonewi thsoyoucangoanddoyourexer cises.
Yandi sachuckl edandki ssedmycheek.
Her :Iam sor ryt odi stur byourbondi ngsessi onbutIwi l
lneedyout ogetont hebedsowecan
checkonyourbabi es, li
ftupyourt opf ormepl ease.
Wegotupandwal kedt owar dst hebed, Igotont hebedandl aidonmyback.Shel iftedupmy
topt henputt hegelonmyt ummyandcheckedonourbabi es, hear i
ngt heirheartbeat sjust
mademef al lmor ei nlovewi tht hem.Yandi sat ookmyhandandki ssedi t.
Her :Looksl i
keever yt hingi sfine, t
hehear tbeati snormalandheal thy.Theygr owingi na
per f
ectpace.
Him:Sowhencanweexpectt of eel movement sandhert ummyt ogr owbi g?
Her :Icanseesomeonei sget tingi mpat ient( wesmi l
ed,ofcosIcoul dn' twait.Iwant edt hebump
already, Iwasl ooki ngf or war dtof eelingt hem ki ck)youcanexpectt oseeasmal lbumpbyher
thirdmont h, i
twontbet hatvi sibl e.Andt hemovement swi l
lstartassoonassheget st oher
fourthmont h, youcanexpectt of eelki ckst hen.
Me:Wonti tbepai nf ul?
Her :Youcanexpectmi norcr ampsnot hingmaj or.
Me:Oh.
Her :Buti t
snot hingt owor ryabout ,t
heyj ustcomeandgo.
Inodded, Iwasal ittlewor ri
edaboutt hecr amps.Ihat edbei ngi npai n.
Her :ButIam al ittlewor riedaboutyourwei ght,youl ostaf ewkgsovert hi
spastweek.Youcan' t
affordt olosewei ghtatal l.
Irolledmyeyes, shewast heonl yoner eallyf usingovert hispr egnancyaf t
erYandi sa.Ij ust
want edt oenj oyt hispr egnancyandpr et endl i
kei twasnor mal ,l
iket herewer enohi ghr i
sks.I
didn'twantt ober emi ndedever ysecondt hatIcoul dlosemybabi es.I twasst ressingmeout
andi t st heonl yt hingt hatcoul dcausemet oloset hem.
Him:Thi spastweekhasbeenal it
tlest r essf ulformeandmywi febutshewi l
lgetbackt oher
nor mal wei ght .Maybeevenputonmor e.
Her :Thatwoul dbegood.
Shegaveusascan.
Her :Wedoneher e.
Shegavemeawetwi pet owi pemyt ummy, Yandi satooki tandwi pedmecl eanthenhel pedme
up.
Him:Thankyoubabe.
Hepeckedmyl i
ps.
Her :Looksl ikeal lthegoodmenar etaken.
Him:Ther ear est il
laf ewgoodonesoutt her eandi ftherear en'
t, youcanmakeyourown.
Her :Att hisage?Ihavel ostal lhope.
Me:Wel lyouwi l
lal sof indyourmat choneday.
Her :Iam cl oset o40nowsot hatonedaybet t erbesoon.( wesmi l
ed)I'l
lbeexpect i
ngyouin
twoweeks, samet i
me.
Me:Okayt hankyousomuchf oral loft his.
Her :Itsonl yapl easur e, don' tf orgett ol iveaheal t
hyl i
fe.
Inodded, weshookhandst henYandi saandIwal kedoutofherof fi
ce.
Me:Iam notdoi ngt hisanymor e.
Him:Younotdoi ngwhat ?
Me:Thesecheckupsever yweek.
Him:Butbabe. ..
Me:Ha. aYandi sat heybor ing, theyst r essingmeout .Youst ressi ngmeout .Iwishyoucould
j
ustl etmeenj oyt hismomentnothavi ngt ober emi ndedofbei ngcar efulallthetimebabe.
Him:Butbabe. .
Me:Hayiwet huYandi sast handwapl ease, nomor e.
Him:Atl eastonceever ymont hst handwasam.
Me:Okayonceamont h.
Him:Thankyou.
Me:Youwi llhavet ot hankmepr oper ly.
Him:Hmm Iam al readyt hinki ngofsomet hing.
Ilaughed.
Me:Noti nt hatwaysi lly, somet hingni ce,somet hingcol dandr ich.
Him:Iwonderwhatt hatcoul dbe.
Heopenedt hedoorf orme, Igoti nandcl osed.Hewentt ohissi de,goti nthenst art
edthecar
anddr oveout .
Me:I cecr eam babepl ease.
Icravedi tever yt i
meaf terbei ngi nt hehospi t
al .
Him:Noi t
snotheal thy.
Me:Sayswho?
Him:Me!Thedoct or .
Me:Butyourbabi esar ecr avi ngi tnotme.
Him:Hayi suka!Theynotevenbabi esyet .
Ipout edandf oldedmyar msi nf rontofmychest ,howIwi shMandl awasher erightnow.
Me:Mandl aneversai dno.
Him:Mandl a?WhatdoesMandl ahavet odowi t
hanyt hing?
Me:Heboughtmei cecr eam ever ytimeIwant edi t
.
Him:Wel lIam notMandl a!
Me:Qui tecl early!Hei sl i
ghtandyoudar k.Yout al
landhi sshor t.Youbuf f
yandhei s..
.
Him:Ski nny!( hel aughed)Ohbabeyousomet hingel se.
Me:That 'swhyyoul oveme.
Him:Yeah. ..I'
l
lgetyouyouri cecr eam.
Me:Thankyou!Thankyou!
Ikissedhi sneck.Hechuckl edandki ssedmyhandmul t
ipl
et i
mes.Wehear dasi renbehi
ndus,
hel etgoofmyhand.
Him:Si tpr oper lyst handwasam.
Hesatupt ooandpul l
edover .
Me:What '
sgoi ngon?
Him:Looksl i
ket odayi sourl uckydayt hat'swhat '
sgoi ngon.
Me:Luckyday?
Her olleddownhi swi ndowwhenwehear daknockonhi swindow.Amet ropoliceoffi
cer
peekedi nt hecar .
Met ropol ice:Wel lwel lwel ll ookwhatwehaveher e,aren'twej usthavi ngt het i
meofourl i
ves
here?
Yandisa:Idon' tknowwhatyoumean, car et oexpl ainwhatyoumeanbyt hat?
M.P:Doyouknowt hati tslittlet hingst hatcauseacci dent s?(Yandinodded)Wher eist heseat
belt
?
Yandisa:I 'm sor rywewer ej ustdr ivingt ot he. .
.
M.P:That '
swhatt heyal lsaywhencaughti nact .
Hewentt ost andi nf rontoft hecarandscr i
bbledsomet hingonpaper .
Yandisa:Looksl ikewer eal lyget t
ingat icket .
Me:I '
m sor ry.
Yandisa:Don' twor ryabouti t,I'l
lsor ti tout .
Thecopcamebackt ousandt or et hepaperof fthebook.
M.P:Iam char gingyouf orki ssi ngandpl ayi ngar oundwhi ledriving.Secondlyyourseatbel ts.
Yandisa:R500?Idi dn' tcauseanyoneanyhar m.
M.P:Youwer en' tpayi ngat tent iont ot her oad, youcoul dhavehi tsomeoneanddi dn'tsee.
Yandisa:ButIwoul dhavehear difIhi tsomet hing.Goddamni tIwaspayi ngat t
entiont othe
road.
M.P:Justt aket het icketandgo.
Het ooki tandgavei tt ome.
M.P:Andf ast enyourseatbel ts.
Yandisa:Thankyou.
M.P:Haveasaf edayyoungman, ma' am.
Us:Yout oo.
Henoddedandwal kedawayt ohi scar .
Yandi:Thesepeopl ear ej ustl ooki ngt omaket hemsel vesl ookgoodbutweknowt hatt heyar e
ascor ruptast heycancome.I fIof fer edhi m moneyhewoul dhavet akenit.
Hest artedt hecaranddr oveof f.Hewast ickedof faboutt het icketshame.
Me:Sor rykal ok.
Him:I tsnotyourf aul tst handwasam.Sowest il
lgetti
ngt hati cecr eam?
Me:Yep!
Hel aughed.
Him:Youl ikea5yearol d.
Me:Ohwel l.
Wegott oourdest i
nat ion, thebeach.Hepar kedt henwegotof f,hewal kedovert omysi deand
tookmyhand.Wewal kedt ot her est aur anthandi nhand.Awai tershowedust oat abl ethen
gaveusmenus, asusual Yandi saor der edf orthebot hofus.Wewai t
edf orabout5mi nut es
thenwegotouror der .Af tereat ingweor der eddesser tast akeaway, Baroneicecream.He
sett
ledt hebi llthenwewentt ot akeawal kont hesandwhi leeat ingicecream.
Him:Howdoyoul ovemenow?
Me:Li keIl ovemysel f, maybeevenmor e.
Hechuckl ed.
Him:I cecr eam i sn' tgoodf orourbabi es.
Me:ButIl ovei tanyway, imnandi .
Him:Idon' thaveasweett oot h.
Me:Obvi ousl y.
Hesmi led.
Him:BabeIhavebeent hinki ng.
Me:About ?
Him:Buyi ngusahome, wecan' tst ar taf ami l
yi naf l
at.Itst oosmal landbabyunf r
iendl y.
Me:Okay.
Him:Ut hiokay, ar en' tyouexci t
ed?
Me:Iam butscar edt oo.
Him:Youwontbeasi ngl epar ent ,I'llbet her ewi thyou.
Me:Iknowbutdon' tyout hinkt henumber6i sbi g?Wej usthave4handsandyouwor kdur ing
theday.Ir eadt hosepamphl ets, t
heywi llneedourundi videdat tenti
onwhent heyher ehowwi llI
gobackt oschool ?
Him:Babest opst ressi ngaboutal l oft hatandj ustthinkaboutt heexci tementthatwi llcome
withpar ent ingoursext upl ets.Justt hi nkabouti twewi llbebuyi ng6ofever ythi
ng, theywi l
lbe
eachother s'bestf riends.Babet heywontgetbor ed, t
heywi llhaveeachot hertopl aywi thand
wewontgetbor edt oo.Wewi llhave6di f
ferentper sonal iti
esl i
vingwi t
hus, wewi llhavef un.
Me:Ihopeyouwi l
lbeasexci tedwhenyour eal i
set hatt heyar ethemostexpensi vedol l
syou
caneverget .
Him:Don'tcal lmybabi esdol lsbutIhaven' tt houghtoft hat .Whi chshowshowexci tedIam
abouthavingt hem.
Me:HeheayYandi sauyadl alawena, wehavet ost artt hinkingaboutever ythingnow.Dr awing
upbudget s, planningever ythingnow.Wej usthave5mont hsl eft.
Him:Sot hatmeanswegoi ngt ohavet obuyahousenowandabi ggercar.Wewi lljustbuy
them aQuant um wenast handwasam sot heywi l
lfitinit.
Weshar edal augh.
Me:Hayisuka!
Him:Yeahbabewewi llhaveawhol esoccert eam kal ok.
Me:ButnotaQuant um, itwillbet oobi g.
Him:YeahnotaQuant um babebutsomet hingt hat'
sbi genought oaccommodat eourf amil
y.
Yeahtheywi llbeexpensi ve.
Me:Hmm.
Him:Butdon' twor ryaboutanyt hingI'l
lmakesur ethatt heygett hebestt hingsmoneycanbuy.
ButIhavet oaskyout hi s...
Me:Hmm?
Him:Yourdr eams, canweputahol dont hem f oratl eastt woyear s.Justunt i
ltheyol derbabe.
Me:Oh.
Iknewit!Iknewhewasgoi ngt oaskmet oputmyl ifeonhol d.
Him:Ipromi seyouwi llpur sueyourdr eamsbutaf t
ert woyear s,pl
ease.
Me:Yandi sa. .
.
Him:Pleasebabet heywi llbet hemostf r
agilepeopl ewewi lleverbesur roundedby, t
heywill
needbotht heirpar entst ot akecar eoft hem especi allyyou.Justunt i
ltheyar etwoyear sold
thenyoucangot oschool .
Me:Okay.
Him:Okay?
Me:Okayyoumadeaval idpoi ntaf t
ertwoyear sIcanpur suemydr eamsr ight?
Him:Ipromi seIwontaskf ormor e.
Me:OkayIhavenopr obl em wi tht hat
.
Him:Thankyoubabe, IknowIam aski ngf ormuch.
Me:Theyar emi net oobutj ustpr omisemet hatwenothavi nganymor eki dsaftert hem.
Him:OkayIpr omi se.
Me:Stru?
Him:Strubobst handwasam.
Hespatonhi shand.Il ookedathi mlikeWTF?
Me:Whatar eyoudoi ng?
Him:Spitaphahayi kakhul ukodwa.
Ispatonhi shand.
Him:Shakeoni t
.
Me:Hu-huh.
Him:Justdoi t.
Ishookhishand.
Him:Nowwebot hcan' tgobackonourwor d.
Me:Yousost upi d.
Hechuckl edandwi pedourhandswi that issue.
Him:Not .
Me:Too.
Him:Not .
Me:Okayyounot .
Wecont i
nuedt alki
ngandwal king.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Abi tlat er.
..
Wedr ovet omom' shousef ort heWi l
lreadi ng.Ipar kedont hedr ivewayt henwegotof f.
Me:Looksl i
ket hel awyeri sal readyher e.
Her:Whydopeopl edoWi llsvel e?Whycan' tyouj ustl iveever ythi ngl i
keitis,l
ett hefami l
y
decideonwhoi st aki ngwhat .
Me:Justt oavoi danysor tofconf lictsbet weent hef ami lymember s.
Her:Butwhati fyounotont heWi ll?
Ilaughed, Iser i
ousl yhaven' tthoughtoft hat .
Me:I twoul dhur tbuti tsnotl ikeIwasl ookingt ogai nsomet hing.
Shesmi ledandknockedont hedoort henwewal kedi n.Wegr eetedandsatdown.
Mom:Okayt hisi sever yonewecanst artnow.
Lawyer :Ifthisi sbei ngr eadt oyout heni tmeanst hatIam gone. ....
..Tomywi f
e,theloveofmy
l
ifeIleaveourhouset oyou.Weshar edal otofmemor iesinher e.Il eavethepi eceofl andin
Mbongwenit oyout ooandmycar st oyou, all3oft hem.Yandi sawi llgetyouadr i
verthatwi l
l
takeyouwher everyouwant .
TomysonYandi sa, QhaweIl eavet hebarandpanel beat erstoyouandyourwi f
e.Youknow
thetypeofbusi nessIwasi n, Iwantyout ocleant hem f orme.Keept hem squeakycl eant hey
willprovi deyourmot her '
sbr eadandbut t
er.Andi fyoucan' tkeept hem cleanyourmot hercan
takef ullcont roloft hem.
Myt wobeaut ifulbabygi rls,Ol wet huIl eaveR30000f oryoubutyoucanonl ygeti tonyour21st
birt
hdaybutt hat 'si fyouhavenochi l
d.Zet hu, 50000f oryouandyoucanonl ygeti tonyour
weddi ngday.Ihaveal readysetadat ewi thyouri nlaws, 25Sept emberoft hisver yyear .
Yandi saandMr sDl ami niwam omhl etoyouIl eavet her est,don' tfinishitallatonce.Iexpect
yout obui l
dmygr andchi ldrenahomebackathome.Makesur eyoubui ldthathomei twillbe
mygi f tt omygr andchi l
dr en, somewher etheycanvi sitandcr eatememor i
es.
Thatwi llbeal l, t
hankyou.
Mom:Thankyou.
Lawyer( MrSi ngh) :Yandi saandPhumzaIwi llneedyout osignt hesef ormeandt hetwopl aces
areyour s.
Hegavemeacont ractl iket hingandpen.Isi gnedt henpassedi tont oPhumza, shesi gnedt o
thenwegavei tt oMrSi ngh.
MrS:Okaywedoneher e.
Mom:Canweof feryouanyt hi ng?
MrS:Not hanksma' am mywi fei swai tingf orme, wegoi ngoutf ordi nner.
Mom:Ohshei sal uckyl ady.
MrS:Iam t hel uckyone, t
hankyouonceagai n.
Me:Thankyou, I'l
lwal kyouout .
MrS:Thankyou.
WegotoutandIwal kedhi mt ot hedoor ,Iopenedf orhi mt hankedhi m onel asttimet henclosed
thedoorassoonashewal kedout .
Me:Thatwentwel l.
Olwet hu:Not hi ngwentwel laphadadwasn' tbei ngser ious!Evenatdeat hhecont i
nuest o
controlus.
Me:Whi chi sgood.
Mom:Iagr eeyourf atherl ovedyouandhewant edt hebestf oryou.
Zethu:Ihavenopr obl em t oobutIam j ustsadt hathewontbet her et owal kmedownt heai sl
e.
Me:I '
ll bet herenj esi si,I'l
lwal kyoudownt heai sle.
Zethu:Thankyoubr o.It hinkt hiscal l
sf oracel ebr ation.
Me:Yessomegoodf oodanddr inks.
Mom:Iam game.
Wel aughed.
Olwet hu:Whatdoyouknowaboutbei nggamenamama?
Mom:Youal wayssayi tnj e.
Phumza:Yougamewenamama.
Mom:NqoI '
llgogetmybag.
Zet
hu&Olwethu:Hehumama.
Shesmi
ledandwenttogetherbagt
henwewentoutt
omycar
,wegotonandIdr
oveust
othe
mall
.

38
Yandi sa:
Wewer ewokenupbymyphoneear l
yint hemor ni
ng, Il ookedatt hecal lerIDt hendr oppedt he
call.
Phumza:Whoi scal lingyouatt hishour ?
Me:Pr ivat enumber ,gobackt osl eep.
Shenoddedandputherheadonmychest .Myphoner angagai nmci m couldn' tshegett he
message?Chant ellehasal waysbeent hickmar n.Idr oppedi tagain.
Phumza:Maybei t si mpor tant .
Me:Iam st illsleepi ngsowhoeveri tisbet t
ertrylater.
Itrangagai nshel ookedatmet hent ookmyphone, Igr abbedi toutofherhandsbef oreshe
coul dl ookatt hecal lerI D.Idr oppedt hecal lthenswi tchedi tof f.
Her :Thatdoesn' tl ookl ikeapr i
vatenumber .
AahIpushedherandgotoutofbed, Iwasi nnomoodt ogeti nanar gumentwi thher .Iwasn' t
evenaboutt odef endmysel f,Ididn'tevenwantt otalkaboutChant el
le.
Her :Wher ear eyougoi ng?
Me:Topeedoyouwantt ocomewi thme?
Her :What '
swi tht heat t
itude?
Me:Khar memanPhumza.
Iopenedt hebat hr oom doorandwal kedi n,Ipeedt henbr ushedmyt eeth.Inf actIt ookal ong
assshower ,Icoul dn' tfacePhumzaj ustyet .Iwasl it
er allyshaki ng.Ihadt ot hinkofagood
reasont oexpl ainChant elle'scal l
.If i
nallygotoutoft heshowerandwentbackt oourbedr oom.
IthoughtIwoul df indPhumzat herebutshewasn' t,Iwentt ot helounget ocheckandshewas
busywashi ngt hedi shes.
Me:Babe. ..
Shet hrewaphoneatmef ast.I thitmychestbef oreIcoul devenduckt henf ellont hef l
oor .I
pickedi tup, itwasmyphoneandi twast urnedon.Iswi pedt hescr eenbutnot hing,okayits
broken.
Her :Whydi dyoul i
e?
Ithoughtshewasgoi ngt oscr eam andcur seatmej udgi ngf rom whatj usthappened.It ooka
deepbr eat handwal kedt owar dsher .
Her :Ist hatapr ivat enumber ?Whydi dyoul ietome?
Me:BabeI '
m sor ry...
Shel aughedoutofdi sbel ief.
Her :Yousor ry?Sor ryf orwhatexact l
y?
Me:Lyi ng.
Her :Idi dn' twantt ogetmar r
iedorevenf allinlovebecauseoft hi
ngsl i
ket hese, unnecessar y
hear tbr eaksandbei ngl iedt o.
Ilookedathershel ookeddownatt hesi nkandr i
nsedt hepl ates.
Me:Butbabet her ei snot hi nggoi ngonbet weenmeandher .
Her :Thenwhydi dyoul i
e?Whydoyouhaveherpi ctur es?
IknewIshoul dhavedel et edherpi ctureswhenwebr okeup, whenIgotmar riedbut .
..Fuckme! !
Ididn' tthi nkPhumzawoul dsear chmyphone, Ievenf orgotthatt heywer estillthere.
Me:Youchecki ngmyphonenow?
Her :Don' tgi vemet hat .Youl ef tmenochoi ce!
Me:Il eftyounochoi ce?Youdon' tsear chmyphone!
Her :Becauseyouknowt hatyouhi dingyourgi rl
fri
endi nthere.
Ilaughed, Ij ustdi dn' tknowwhatt osay.Tear swill
owedoutofhereyes.Ist oppedl aughingand
pulledherbutshesl appedmyhandsof fher .
Her :Youst andi ngt her eandl aughi ngi nmyf aceYandi sa.Am Iaj oketoyou?
Me:Nobabe.
Her :Thenwhyar eyoul aughi ng?
Me:Babe. ..
Sheputherhandup.
Her :Idon' twantt oheari t
.
Me:Babecanyoul etmeexpl ain?
Her :Youwantt ol aughi nmyf aceagai n?Oht hest upi dPhumzat houghtIwasr eal l
yf alli
ngf or
her .(shei mi tatedmyvoi ce)OhmyGod!Howcoul dIbesost upi d? !Whywoul dyouf al linlove
withmei nt hef irstpl ace?Iam j ustagi rlfrom t heval leywhohasnot hi ngt oof feryou, Iam not
beaut i
full ikeher !Iam notsexyandoutgoi ngl i
keher !
Me:Youar eever yt hingshei sn't!
Her :Yeahyour ight .
Me:Iam noti ntoher , Iam i nt oyouPhumzawhycan' tyoubel ieveme?
Her :Youl yi ng,agai n!
Me:I '
llneverl iet oyou.
Her :Butyouj ustdi dQhawe.
Shel ookedatmef rom headt ot oet henupagai n.
Her :Youget ti
ngr eadyt omeetupwi t
hheragai n?
Me:Nowwhywoul dIdot hat ?
Her :Youaski ngme?Whywer eyoudoi ngi ti nthef irstpl ace?
Iputmyhandsupandwal kedt oourbedr oom, Icoul dn'tdot his.It hrewmysel font hebedand
sighedoutl oudl y.It hinkIj ustr uinedwhatwehad, Ij ustbr okeherhear t,hert r
ust , Ijustr uined
ever ything.Icoul dhavehandl edt hesi tuat ionbet terbutIdi dn'tknowhow.
.
.
Phumza:
Ipackedt hedi shesawayt hent ookoutasl iceofbr ead, Iatei tt hent ookmypi lls.Iwasr eal l
y
feel i
ngst upi dr i
ghtnow, Idon' tknowwhyIt rustedorevengavemyl ovet oYandi sai nt hef ir
st
place.Obvi ouslyhei sl ikeever yot hermenoutt her e, alai randabl oodycheat .Ishoul dhave
l
ist enedt omymi ndwheni twar nedmeagai nstf allingi nl ove.ButIdi dn' t
,doyouknowwhy?
BecauseIam sobl oodyst upi d!Ipour edmysel fwat eri nagl asst hendr anki t
,Iputt hegl assi n
thesi nkt henf i
ni shedwhatIst arted.Ideci dedt ospr ingcl eanj ustt ogetmymi ndof fYandi sa
andever yt hingIsawi nhi sphone, Ishoul dn'thavet ouchedi t.Af tercl eani ngthel oungeand
kitchenIwentt ot hebedr oom, Ifoundhi m sl eepingont hebed.Hest illhadat owelwr apped
aroundhi swai st .
Me:Yandi sa.
Ihi thischestl ight ly, hegotaf rightandl ookedatme.
Me:Ineedt het hi ngsyousl eepi ngon.
Him:Babecanwet alkpl ease.
Me:Thesheet spl ease.
Hegotupandof ft hebed.It ookt hesheet sandbedcovert henwal kedout .Iwentt ot he
bat hroom, Iqui ckl ywashedt hem t hent ookt hem outt odr yout .Iwentbackt oourr oom and
unpackedourbag, It ookal lthecl ot hest ot hebat hr oom andsoakedt hem i nthebat ht ub.
"Phumzapl ease" , Ilookedathi m.Hewasst andingbyt hebat hr oom door .Iignor edhi m andj ust
star t
edwashi ngt hecl ot hes, Idi dn' twantt ot alktohi m.Idi dn' tevenwantt oseehi sugl yf ace.
Him:Okayher eist het r
ut hIj usthopeyoucanhandl ei t
.
Me:Idon' twantyourt rut hYandi sa.
Him:Chant ell
ei smyex, wewer et oget herf or7year s.Webr okeupaf ewmont hsbef or eour
weddi ng.
Me:Honest lyIdi dn' task.
Him:Kant iPhumzawhatdoyouwantmet odo?Iam apol ogi zingandIam bei nghonestwi th
youbutyou. ..
Me:Yandi sapl easeman!Pl ease!Idon' twantt oheari t!
Ist oppedwhatIwasdoi ngandpushedhi m outofmyway, Iwal kedoutoft hebat hroom.Iwent
tot hebedr oom andt ookoutabag, Ithrewi tont hebedandst ar tedt aki ngmycl othesoutoft he
closet .Ijustt hrewt hem i nt hebagIdi dn'thavet i
met opack.Iwant edt ogetoutoft hispl ace
andoutofhi slife.Icoul dn' tdeal withal lthatwasgoi ngonher e, Icoul dn'tcompet ewi th7year s.
Icoul dn'tcompl et ewi thChant el l
eIwasgoi ngt ol ose.
Me:Youl iedt omeandsai dshewasyourf riendngokushei syourex.Anexyoust il
ltext ing
andcal li
ng, anext hatyoust i
llmeet i
ngupwi t h.Anexyoust illkeepingpi ctures, notapi cture
butpi ctur esof !Andyouexpectmet obel i
evet hatshei sjustanex.Al lthiswhi leIthoughtyou
wer einl ovewi t hmebutl it
tledi dIknowyouwer edoi ngal loft hisbehi ndmyback, seei ngand
calli
ngherbehi ndmyback!Al lthoseni ght sIspenther eal laloneyouwer ewi thherr ight ?
Him:Ha!babeIam notcheat ingonyou!
Me:Thenwhyl ie?Whyar eyoust il
lseei ngher ? !Whydoyouhavepi cturesofhernakedonyour
phone? !WhyYandi sa? !
Him:Idon' tevenl ookatt hosepi ctur es!!
Ismi ledandshookmyhead.Iwassopi ssedIcoul dl i
terallyfeelst eam bl owingoutofmyear s!
Hewasl yi ngt ome, noonekeepspi ctur esi nt hei rphoneandneverl ookatt hem.Ij ustwi shhe
couldst opl yingandt hinkingIam st upi d.
Me:Idon' tthi nkIcandot hi sYandi sa.
Him:Whatar eyousayi ng?Ar eyoul eavi ngme?
Inoddedwi tht earsf alli
ngdownmycheeks.
Me:Iwantt ogohome.
Him:Kodwankosi yam!BabeIam notcheat ingonyou!
Izippedt hebagandchangedi ntoal ongdr esst hent ookmyphone.
Me:CanIhavet ranspor tmoneyIpr omi set opayi tbackassoonasIgethome.
Him:Justl iket hatyougoi ngt ogi veuponus?Yougoi ngt owal koutofmyl if
e?Thi smar riage?
Mci m It ookhi swal letandt ookoutmoney.Iputi tint hebagt hent ooki tandwal kedout ,my
hear twasbr okeni nt ot i
nyl it
tlepi eces.Idoubti tcoul dbef i
xedagai n.Iwascr yingmyeyesout
asImademywayt hr oughmanagementdownst airs,Iwal kedt othest opandwai t
edf orat axi.
Afteraf ewsecondsIsawYandi sawal ki ngoutoft hebui ldingi nshor tsqha.Ihai ledthef irst
taxiIsaw, Idi dn' tcar ewher eitwasgoi ngIj ustwant edt ogetawayf rom him.I tstoppedandI
gotont hencl osedt hedoor .Yandi sawhi st l
edandshout edf ort hedr ivertostop, hest opped.Oh
myGod!
Me:Pl easedr ivet uh.
Driver:Whoamansi si !What 'supbr o?
Yandi sa:Mywi fej ustgoti nt hist axiout tieyam andIwanthert ogetof f
,shei sn'tokay.
Driver:Heyst opwast ingmyt imewenaIam wor kingher e.
Yandi sa:Jonga( Look)i twontevent ake30secondst ogetherof f.
Heopenedt hedoorandpul l
edmybagout .
Me:Yandi saman.
Yandi sa:Phumzapl easedon' tdot hi sndi yakut handamt ananomt uyi nimadodal omt wana.I
l
oveyoust handwasam, t
her eisnooneel sebutyou.Iam notcheat ingonyouandIwi l
lnever
dot hatj ustgetof ft het axi sowecant alk, ifyoust illwantt oleaveaf terthisthenIwontst op
you.
Thiswassoembar rassi ng,hewasbl abbi ngoutourpr i
vat elifeinfrontofal lt
hesepeopl e.Now
everyoneknewt hatIwasbei ngcheat edon, t hatIwasn' tgoodenough.
Driver:Hayimansi si canyougetof fmyt axit het woofyouar ewast i
ngmyt i
me.
Yandi sa:Pl easebabe. ..
Igotof fthet axibutonl ybecauseIcoul dn' tt aket hel ookt hesepeopl ewer egivingme.Yandi sa
tookoutR100f r
om mybagandgavet hedr iver .Thedr iverwassohappyshame, hecoul dn't
stopt hanki nghi m.Hecl osedt hedoorandt het axidr oveaway.
Yandi sa:Whydon' tyoubel i
eveme?Iwi llneverdosomet hingl i
ket hatndi yakuthanda( Ilove
you)manJoe.
Me:I fyoul ovedmeyouwoul dn'thavegoneoutt odosomet hingt hatwoul dhur tme.
Him:I twi llneverhappenagai nbabeIpr omi se.
Me:Whatwonthappenagai n?
Him:Iwontl ieeveragai n.
Me:Butyou' llcont inueseei ngher ?
Him:Nobabeno!Seei ngherwasami st ake, Ishoul dn'thavehavedonet hat.Iam sor ry.
Me:Idon' tknowi fIcanbel ievet hat .
Him:Bel ievemest handwasam, Iloveyouwi thmywhol ebei ngIwoul dneverr isklosingyou.
Ifoldedmyar msi nf rontofmychest ,Icoul dn' tbel ieveawor dhewassayi ng.Mymi ndwas
madeupaboutt hisandi twasgoi ngt ober eallyhar df orhi mt oconvi ncemeot herwise.
Him:Don' tleaveme.
Itookmybagandhand, hepul ledmebackt othebui ldi ngt henupyoourr oom.Whenwegot
therehepushedmeagai nstt hewal landki ssedmyl ips, Ipushedhi m buthehel dmyhandsand
pinnedt hem agai nstt heway.
Me:Yandi saman.
Heki ssedmyneckt henletgoofmyhandsandpul l
edupmydr ess.Isl appedhishandsbuthe
didn' tst opwhathewasdoi ng.
"Ha. anaYandi sa!",hepul leddownmypant yt hent ookof fhisshorts.Hel ift
edmeupand
i
nser tedhi msel finmyf airy,hest ar tedmovi ngi mmedi at el
y.
Me:OohQhawe. ..
Itjustf el tsogoodt hatIst oppedf i
ght i
nghi m.
Him:Il oveyou.
Me:Il oveyout oo.
Him:Iam sor ry.
Me:Ohmygosh. ..
aaah!Qhawe!
Weshar edaki ssandj ustwentwi ldoneachot her,Iwasst i
llmadathi m butIjustcoul dn'
t
resisthi m.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Wel aidont hef l
oorcompl etelyoutofbr eat h,thatwasgood.Thatwast hebestIhaveeverhad,
i
twaswi l
d.Thi sgi rlwasr eal l
yshowi ngmef l
ameswhywoul dIwantt oloseher?She
compl et esme!Il oveher !Shei st hemot herofmychi ldr en,theonl ygirlIhaveeverf elli
nlove
with.
Me:Iwoul dnevercheatonyou.
Her :Shhh
Sheki ssedmyl i
ps, Ikissedherbackal mosti mmedi atel ybutshebr okei t.
Shegotup.
Me:Wai t.
.
Her :Iam goi ngt ohaveashower .
Me:CanIj oinyou?
Her :No.
Me:It houghtwej ustmadeup.
Her :Wel lyout houghtwr ong.
Shewal kedt ot hebat hroom, Iscr at chedmyheadt hengotup.Ipi ckedupourcl othesandt ook
them t oourr oom.Whenshewal kedi ntot hebedr oom Iwal kedout ,Iwentt ohaveashower
agai n.Af tershower ingIwentbackt oourr oom t olotionandgetdr essed.Iwor ebl uejeans,
whi tet -shi r
tandbl ackNi keai rmaxki cks.It ookmykeys, wall
etandphone.
Me:BabeI '
llbebackne?
Shej ustl ookedatme.It ri
edt oki ssherbutshepushedme.
Me:Iam goi ngt ogetanewphoneandt hengot othepanelbeat erswor kshop.
Her :....
Me:Ij ustt houghtIshoul dt ellyouwher eIam goi ng.
Shet ookt hecl otheswewer ewear ingandwal kedout .
Me:Okay!
Ifollowedaf terherbutt ot hel ounget hendownst airst omycar .Igotonandst artedtheengi ne
thendr oveout .Idr ovest raightt ot hemal l,Igotaphoneati Phonest oresandusedt hesame
sim car dIwasusi ng.Ical ledbackChant elle,Iwant edt oknowwhatwassour gent .Shet ook
thecal limmedi ately.
.
Her :Hey
Me:What '
sup?Whatdoyouwant ?
Her :Yout ol ookaf teryoursonf oraf ewmi nut es,Ihaveani ntervi
ewat12.
Me:Ican' t
.
Her :Youcan' toryouwont ?
Me:Ican' tChant ell
e!
Her :Youj ustusel essasaf at her!
Shehungup.Ar gh!Ical ledherback.
Me:Don' thangup!I 'l
lpickhi m upi naf ewmi nutes.
Her :Thankyou.
Me:Shar p.
Idroppedt hecal lthenwentt omycar ,Igotonanddr ovetoChantelle'
splace.Iparkedout si
de
thegat et hengotof fandwal kedi n.Iknockedont hedoorandwai ted,sheopenedaf t
eraf ew
seconds.
Me:Wher ei she?
Her :Okaysomeonewokeupont hewr ongsi deoft hebedthismor ning.
Me:Idon' thavet imef orchi tchatj ustgethi m soIcango.
Her :Okay!Qhawe!
Itwasgoi ngt ot akeawhi lef orall ofthist osinkin.Ihavea4yearol dsonandhi snamei salso
Qhawe.Shewentt ogethi m andhi sbag.
Me:Heyl ittleman.
Him:Hi .
Itookhi sbag.
Her :Don'tl ethi m st arveYandi sapl ease.
Me:Okay.
Her :Nosweet sori cecr eam becausehi schestget sblockedatnightandhet r
oublesme.
Me:Noi cecr eam.
Her :Andher ei shi sast hmapumpi ncaseheget sanat t
ack.
Me:Hei sast hmat i
c?
Her :Yesandheknowshowt ousei t.Justkeepi tinhisreachplease.
Me:Okaygoti t.
Her :Thankyou.
Ilookedather ,shewasl ooki nggood.Dr essedpr oper.
Me:You' l
lki l
lt hati nterview.
Her :Ihopeso.
Me:Justwal ki nwi thconf i
dence, talkfreelyandt hejobwi l
lbeyour s.
Her :Notest aken.
Me:Okayl etusr unne?
Her :Thankyouonceagai n.
Me:Nopr obl em.
ItookQhawe' shand.
Her :Wishmommygoodl uck.
Him:Luckmommy.
Her :Kisski ss.
Shekneel eddownsoheki ssedhercheekt henl i
ps.
Her :Mommyl ovesyou.
Him:Qhawel ovesyou.
Her :Begoodt odaddy.
Henodded.
Me:Okayl et'sgo.
Him:Byemommy.
Her :Byebaby.
Ipul l
edhi m sohest artedwal king.Iopenedt hedoorf orhim,hegoti nandIbuckl edhimt hen
closedt hedoor .Iwentt omysi deandgoti n,Ithrewhi sbaginthebackseatt henst art
edthecar
anddr oveust omom' shouse.Ther ewasnowayIwasgoi ngtotakehi mt omyapar t
mentaf ter
whatPhumzat hreatenedt odo.
.
WhenwegothomeIpar kedt hengotof f.Iwal kedovert ohissi
deandopenedf orhim, hegot
off.Iclosedt hedoort hent ookhi sbagf rom thebackseat .
Me:Comel etsgomeetyourgr andmot her .
Him:Shei sn'ther e.
Me:NotMr sAdams, Iam t alkingaboutmymot her .Shei snicesoyou' l
l loveher .
Henodded.Iknockedont hedoort henwal kedi n.Wher ei smom na?
Me:Mama!
"Youdon' thavet oshoutIam r i
ghther e",shesai dwal kingoutoft heki tchen.
Her :Whosechi ldi st hat ?
Me:Can' tyouseenamama?
Shel ookedathi mt henatme.
Her :Hel ooksl i
keyoubutwhoi sheorshe?
Ilaughed, hehadanaf roandhewasr eallycut e.
Me:Hei sahemamaandhi snamei sQhawe.
Her :Qhawe? !
Me:I tsal ongst or ymamaonet hatIdon' twantt ogeti nto.
Her :Whoi shi smot her ?
Me:Chant ell
e.
Her :Chant ell
e.
Shesai dhernamel ikeshewasdef eated.Sheevent hrewherhandsi nt heair .
Me:Idi dn' tknowmama, Ijustf oundoutnam.
Her :When?
Me:WhenIgot" attacked"Chant elle'sfathert ol dmet hatIhadason. ..
Her :Sohedi dt hatt oyou?( Inodded)Hai bowhydi dn'tyoul ayachar ge?
Me:I tdoesn' tmat t eranymor ebecausehei snomor e, afterdadpassedonhef ollowedhi m.
AndImethi mt heni ghthi sJer omepassedon.
Her :No!You. .
Me:Nomama!NoIwoul dnever .Ijustwentt her et otal kt oChant el
leaboutQhawe.
Her :Okay.( shel ookedathi m)Qhawer i
ght ?(henodded)Qhawebabycomeher e,woul dyouli
ke
somecooki esandmi lk?
Henodded.
Her :Comewi thme.
Shepul ledhi mt ot heki t
chen, Ifollowedaf t
ert hem.Iputhi sbagont heki t
chencount ert
hen
l
iftedQhaweup, Iputhi m ont heki tchenhi ghchai r
.Mom gavehi m biscui t
st henagl assofmilk.
Me:Pl easewar mi tupf orhim.
Shel ookedatme.
Me:Hei sast hmat ic, hischestget sbl ockedatni ghtsohi smot herpr efer shim nothavi ng
anyt hingcol d.
Shenoddedandpour edt hemi l
ki ntoasmal lpotandputi tont hestove.
Me:I mi cr owavengeyant oninamama?( whati st hemi cr owavef or?
)
Her :War mi ngmi lkf orachi l
di nt hemi crowavei snotheal thy.
Me:Okay.
Shepul ledmej ustadi stancef rom Qhawe.
Me:Eatyourbi scui ts, don'tf all.
Him:Yesdaddy.
Ismi led, hecal l
edmedad.
Her :Doesyourwi feknow?
Ilookedatmom.
Me:No, notyet .Andshecan' tfindoutmamanotaf t
erwhathappenedear li
ertoday.
Her :Heh!Yandi sayouneverceaset oamazeme.Youar egoi ngt ohideyourchi ldfrom your
wife?Hehast obei ntroducedt ot hef ami ly.
Me:IknowmabutPhumzacan' tfindoutyetsot hatint roduct i
onhast owai t
.
Her :Unt ilwhen?
Me:Idon' tknowma!Doyouknowt hatshet hr eat enedt ol eavemet oday?Ihadt ogetherof fa
taxithismor ningj ustbecauseshesawChant elle'soldpi cturesinmyphonehowmuchmor e
whenshef i
ndsoutt hatIhaveasonwi t
hher ?Shewi llleavememamaandshewontcome
back.Ican' triskl osi ngher .
Her :Thisi sachi ldwear etalkingaboutnotsomedi rtyoucansweepundert hecar petandhope
nobodynot i
ces.Hei sgr owi ngup, hewi l
lneedhi sfather .
Me:SowhatdoyousuggestIdo?Losemywi fe?
Sher emovedt hepotf rom thest oveandpour edmi l
ki ntoacup, wedi dn'thavepl asticmugs
aphaekhaya.Shegavei ttoQhawewhowasn' teveneat ingt hebi scuitsinf rontofhi m.
Her:Soyour atherl oseyourson?
Me:Doyouknowhowmanyki dsIwi lllosei fPhumzal eavesme?
Her:Youhavi ngt wins?
Me:Shei scar ryingsi xkidsi nherr i
ghtnow, Icantaf f
or dt ost r
essherorevenl oseher .Ican't
mamandi yamt handauPhumza.( IlovePhumza)
Her:Si x?!Younotj oking?
Me:Iam ser iousasahear tat tackr ightnow.
Her:WowIdi dn' tthinkyouhadi tinyou!
Il
aughed.
Me:Hehumama.
Her:OhmyGod!Soyourf at herl eftuswi thsomanybl essings?
Me:Ohmamai tsGod, t
hat'swhatPhumzasays.
Her:Of cosi t
sGod.Butwi llshebeabl et ocar ryallthosebabi esi nher?
Me:Yeahmamabuti tshighr isk, wehavet owat chsomanyt hings.HerBp, herst r
essl evels.
..
That'
swhyshecan' tfi
ndout .Youwontt el lher.
Her:Idon' tknowYandi sawhywast hi sgi rlhidingt hischi ldalltheseyear s?
Me:Iaskedhert ogetr i
dofi t
...
Her:Yoh!Whor aisedyouYandi sa? !Ar eyoust il
lmyson?ThesonIhadwoul dneveraska
womant oabor thi sownf leshandbl ood.Wher edidyoul earnt hat ?Whot aughtyout hat
becauseyourf at herwoul dnevert eachyousuch!Ubol il
emanmt andini!Rot ten!(Your ot
tenmy
chil
d)
Me:Butshedi dn' tabor thim mamai sn' tthatwhat '
simpor tant?
Her:Yout al kbacknowYandi sa?
Me:Hayimama.( nomot her )
Her:Sowhatnow?Howwi llyouhi det hischi l
d?
Me:Idon' tknowmama.
Her:Itget shar derever yday, i
fyouhi dehi m nowt henyouwi llneverbeabl etot ellyourwi f
e.I
under standwhyyouar edoi ngt hisbutyourwi fehast oknow.I '
lltal
ktoherandmakeher
under standt hatyouknewnot hi ngabouthi mt il
lnow.
Me:Shewon' tmama, shewi l
lj ustl eaveme.
Shelaughed.
Her:Shewon' t.Wher eisshenow?
Me:Il eftheratt heapar t
ment .
Her:Wher edi dyousayyougoi ng?
Me:Tobuyanewphone, shebr oket heot herone.
Her:Ar eyousur ether eisnot hi nggoi ngonbet weenyouandhi smot her?
Me:NomamaIl ovemywi feandIdon' tevendr eam ofhur ti
ngher .
Her:Thatbet terbet hecaseYandi sabecausei fyouar el yingt ome. .
Me:Iswearondad' sgr ave.
Her:Okaywhyi sn'tyoursoneat ing?
Me:Idon' tknownam.Boydon' tyoul i
kewhatyoueat ing?
Him:Ido.
Me:But ?
Him:Mommyf eedsme.
HehnanguuChant el l
eezondonel aumt ana, Idon' twantasof tief orason.
Me:Comet odaddywewi lleatt oget her .
Itookhi mf rom hi sseatandputhi m downt hent ookt hecooki esandmi lk.Wewentt ositinthe
l
ounge.
Me:Ont hecouchboy.
Hegotont hecouchandcr ossedhi sl egsi nf rontofhi m, Isatdownnextt ohim.It ookacooki e,
dunkedi tinmi lkt hengavei tt ohi m.Het ookabi tet henIbi t
eoni ttoo.
Me:Hmmm yummy.
Isaidbr ushi ngmyt ummy, hegi ggl edandbr ushedhi st ummyt oo.
Him:Yummy.
Me:Nowyout ry.
Het ookacooki eanddi dwhatIdi dt henat e.
Me:Yummy?
Him:Yummy!
Hef edme.
Me:Hmm yummy!
Hesmi led, Ibr ushedhi shai rthenki ssedhi sfor ehead.It hinkIl ovemyson, Iwasf eel
ingso
proud.Hewasofmyownseed.
"Youmakeagr eatf at her ",mom sai d.Il ookedathershehadahugesmi l
eonherf ace.Iwi ped
myweteyes.
Her :HehIt hinkyoursoni sjustl i
keyou, hei ssof t.
Me:Iam notsof t
.
Her :Lookatyour ightnowyout earing.
Me:Ij ustcan' tbel i
evei tmama, Ihaveason.
Her :Andher emi ndsmeofyou.Youwer eal wayst hisr eservedandshyboywhowant edmet o
doever yt hingf orhi mj ustl i
kehi m.
Me:HayiChant ellei sspoi l
inghi m.
Her :That 'swhatyourf atheral sot houghtbutyouwer ej ustyourmot her
'sbaby.Het houghtyou
wer egoi ngt ot urnoutgay.
Me:Ha!Mama!
Shel aughed.
Her :Buther eyouar e, youhaveasonandawi fe.AndIt hinkshewi llfal
linl
ovewi t
hhim.
Me:HayimamaPhumzawontunder stand, thatgi rliscr azy.
Her :ButIdon' tthinkshehasi tinhert ohat eandj ustgi veuponhermar ri
age.
Me:Shet hi nksIdon' tloveher .
Her :Thencomecl eanaboutever ythi ng.
Me:Idon' twantt otal kaboutt hisanymor e.
Igotup.
Me:Ihavet ogobackt ot heapar tmentbef oreshet hinksIam wi t
hChant ell
e.
Her :Andyourson?
Me:CanIl eavehi m wi thyouf orahourmax!
Her :Of cosbutyouneedt ot hinkabouti t,youcan' tlivel i
ket his.
Me:Iwi llmama.BoyI '
llleaveyouwi thgr andmaf oracoupl eofhour sne?I'l
lcomebackt opi ck
youupandwecangoeatout ,whatdoyoul i
kepi zzaorabur ger ?
Him:Pi zza.
Me:Wecangogetpi zzawhenIcomeback.
Him:Yey!
Me:Yesyey!Gr anwi lllookaf t
eryoune?
Henodded.
Me:Okaymom hi sbagi sovert hereandher eishi sast hmapump, heknowshowt ouseit.Just
puti tinavi siblepl acepl ease.
Her :Okayi tsnotmyf irstt i
mel ookingaf terachi l
d.
Me:Buthei saspeci al chi l
d.
Shel aughed.Iki ssedhi sf orehead.
Me:Dadi scomi ngj ustnow.
HenoddedsoIwal kedout .Igoti nt hecaranddr ovet ot heapar tment .
.
Igott ot heapar tmentt of indPhumzal yingont hef l
oorwi thpi l
lsandabr okenglassrightnext
toher .Ir ushedovert oher .
"Phumza!Phumi ,babe" ,Ishookherbutnot hing.
Me:Babepl easeopenyoureyes. ..Babeyoucan' tleavemepl ease!
Ifeltherpul set herewasnot hi
ng.
Me:ComeonPhumza!
Islappedherf acet wi cet hengotupandl ookedf orherphone.Iwentt ohercalll
oganddi all
ed
herdoct or'snumber ,shepi ckedupal mosti mmedi ately.It oldherwhatIknewandshet oldme
torushhert ohospi tal shewasgoi ngt ober eadyf orus.Iwentbackt oherandscoopedheri nt
o
myarmsthenwentdownstairswit
hher
.Iputheri
nthebackseatt
hengotint
hedr
iver
'sseat
anddr
ovetothehospi
tal
,prayingt
omysel
f.Icoul
dn'
tloseher
!Lorddon'
tmakemeloseher!

39
Yandi sa:
Idrovest rai ghtt ot heemer gencyent rance, Ipar kedt hengotof fandshout edf orhel p.
Phumza' sdoct orandaf ewot hernur sesr ant ouswi thever ything, t
heyputheront hest r
etcher
thenpumpedoxygeni ntohermout h.
Me:You' l
lsaveherr ight ?
DrN:Wewi lldoever ythi ngt hatwecan.GetDrDavi sf orme!Tel lhimt omeetmei nt he
emer gencyr oom, now!
Theypushedt hest retchert ot heemer gencyr oom, afteraf ewmi nutesDrDavi sr ani nt
ot he
room.Bei ngout sidenotknowi ngwhatwasgoi ngoni nt herewaski lli
ngme, Iwant edtoknow
whatwasgoi ngonwi thmywi f e.Iwi pedmyf acet hent ookaver ydeepbr eath.Isatdownon
thewai ti
ngchai rsbutgotupagai n,whatdi dIdo?Howcoul dIbesost upid?Anur sewal kedout
oftheemer gencyr oom, Iwal kedupt oher .
Me:I sshe. .issheokay?
Her:Thedoct or sar est i
llbusywi thher , didshet aket hepi ll
s?
Me:No!Idon' tknow.Ij ustf oundheront heki tchenf l
oorwi thherBppi ll
snextt oher .
Her:Wast hecaponorof f?
Me:I twasst i
llon.
Her:Itwasst illonokay.
Sher anbacki ntot heemer gencyr oom.OhmyGod!Ihavebeensot errifi
edofl osi ngsomeone
i
nmyl i
fe,myi nsi deswer eupset ,Icoul dhearmyhear tbeat ingandmybl oodf lowi ng.Iwas
shaking, myhandswer eshaki ng.Myeyeswer et earyandIwassweat ingl i
kecr azy.
.
.
Phumza:
Iwokeupconf usedoutofmymi nd, ther ewasabeepi ngsound, andpeopl etalkingont opofme.
Theirlanguagesoundedsounf ami l
iarandIcoul dn'tevenseet hem pr oper l
ybecauseoft he
l
ightt hatwasshi ni ngonmyf ace.Ther ewasapi peinmymout h, wherewasI ?
"Shei sback!Wegother ",fi
nal l
ysomet hingf ami li
ar!
"Ican'tfeelherpul se, itsdead"amal evoi cesai d.Judgi ngfrom t hatst at ementIknewIwasi n
hospi t
albutwhatwasIdoi ngher e?
"l
etmet ry...Itsnott her e"af ami liarfemal evoi cesai d.Isl owl yclosedmyheavyeyes.
"Shei sfadi ngaway"
"NononoMr sDl ami nidon' tcl oseyoureyes, staywi thusher e.St aywi thusandwor kwithus",
themal evoi cesai d.It riedt oopenmyeyesbutt heywer esoheavy.
"Youar ei nhospi tal ,yourhusbandbr oughtyoui n.Youf aintedi nyourki tchendoyour emember
that?"
Ishookmyheadwi tht ear sf allingonei thersi deofmyf ace.
"Thepi l
ls,di dyout aket hepi lls? ",agai nIshookmyhead.Icoul drememberhavi ngt hem inmy
handsbutIdon' tknowwhathappenedaf tert hat.
"Isti
llcan'tf indherpul se"
"Okayt aket hepi peoutofhermout h, sitherup" ,
someonepushedmesoIcoul dsi tupt henthey
tookt hepi peoutofmymout h.Igaspedf orai r,Icoul dn'tbreat he.Ihi tmychest
"Trytobr eat heMr sDl ami nipl ease.Cl oseyourmout h, don'tcl oseyoureyes.Cl oseyourmout h
andf ocusonbr eat hing"
IdidasIwast oldandi tf i
nallycamebackt ome.Ibr eat hedoutl oudl y.
"ThankGodf ort hat ,feel herpul seagai n"
Themal eDrf eltmypul seandshookhi shead.
"Thisisodd, Ihaveneverhear dofsomet hingl i
ket his"
Her emovedapi eceofmycl ot hi ngandl istenedt omyhear tbeat .
"It
snor mal , i
tsheal thy.Iwi llneedyout ot aket wodeepbr eathsf ormet henst opbr eathi
ng
compl etely, hol dyourbr eathf oratl east10seconds"
Ididjustt hat , hef el tmypul set hensmi led.
"It
sback" , hedoubl edcheckedt hent riplechecked.
"It
sreal l
yback.Ineedyout osendt hesebl oodsampl esformet othel ab,Ineedt hem t ested
ri
ghtaway.Iwantt her esul tsbyt heendoft heday. "
"Yesdoct or "
"DrNhl aphoshei sal lyour snow"
"ThankyouDrDavi s"
Hesmi ledandwal kedoutoft her oom.
DrN:Howar eyouf eel ingnow?
Me:Thi r sty.
Myt hroatj ustf eltdr y.Shepour edmeagl assofwat erthenhel pedmet odrink.
Me:Thankyou.
Sheputi tdownt henhel pedmeupandt oawheel chai r
.
Her:Whathappened?
Ishrugged.
Her:Youcan' trememberanyt hing?
Me:Ijustcoul dn'tbr eat het hat '
sal l
.
Her:Yourr esul tsshowt hatyourbl oodpr essur eisr eallyhigh,youal mostgotahear tattack.Is
theresomet hi ngwor ryingyou?
Me:No, nott hatIcant hi nkof .
Ididn'
twantt ot alkabouti t.Shenoddedandpushedt hewheel chair.
Her:Iwi llt akeyout omyof ficesowecancheckonyourbabi est henadmi tyout oar oom just
fortheday, DrDavi swant stomoni t
oryou.
Me:Iam f ine, Ijustwantt ogohome.
Her:Andyouwi l
lassoonasDrDavi shasyourt estr esult
sandknowswhat '
swr ongwi thyou.
Me:Andi t
hiyouj ustsai di twasmyBP?
Sheopenedt hedoorandpushedmeout .
.
.
Yandisa:
Theexci tementIf el twhenIsawherawakeandt alking,outoft hiswor ld!Wor dscouldn' t
explai
nt hej oyi nmyhear t
.Ihal frant oherandherdoct or.Itri
edt opeckherl ipsbutshet ur
ned
herfacet ot hesi de, Iki ssedhercheek.Okayshewasst il
lmadatme.
Me:Yougavemeaf r
ight .
Her:Ar ewegoi ngf ort hatcheckup?
Dr:Ofcos.
Shepushedherwheel chai rt oherof fice.
Her:Idon' twantyoui nher ewi t
hme.
Me:What ?
Her:Youhear dme.
Me:ButP. ..
Dr:MrDl ami niIwi l
lhavet oaskyout owai tout sideyouupset t
ingmypat i
ent.(cutt
ingme)
Me:Okay.
Iwalkedoutt oofDrNhl apho' sofficedef eated.If uckedup!
.
.
Phumza:
Rightaf terhewal kedoutIgotont hebedandr evealedmyt ummy, DrNhl aphodi dherj ob.She
wassi lentf orabout3mi nutesmaybeandhersi lencewasst arti
ngt ogett ome.
Me:Ar et heyokay?
Her:Looksl ikei t.
Me:Yousoundunsur e.
Her:Iam sur e, youwer epr ettyluckyt obebr oughther eont ime.
Inodded, Iwasn' tfeel ingl uckyatal l
.Iwasn' tsur eifmyhusbandl ovedmeornot .Iwasn' tsure
i
fhewascheat ingonmeornot .Ever yt hi
ngIt houghtwas, wasn't.
Her:Thei rhear tbeat sar est rongandnor mall i
keeverwhi chi sgood.
Me:Al loft hem?
Her:Al loft hem sot hatmeansyouhavenot hingt owor ryaboutr egardingyourbabi es.But
pleaset ryt omanageyourst r
essl evelandbl oodpr essur e.Youcan' taffordtogothrought hat
exper i
enceagai n,youwontonl yl oseyourpr egnancybutyourl i
feaswel l
.
Me:Thatwoul dbegr eatmos.
Imumbl edt omysel f.
Her:Whatwast hat ?
Me:Not hi ng.
Her:Ar eyousur eever ythingi sf ine?
Me:Absol ut ely.
Icoul dn'tdi scussmymar riagewi thsomeoneel se, mom sai dever yt
hingthatconcer nsmy
mar ri
agei sj ustf ormeandhi m.Not hi
r dpartiesshoul dbei nvolved.
Her:Okayt hatwi llbeal l.I'l
lcal lanur set otakeyout oyourr oom.
Iwipedmyt ummyt hengotof ft hebedasshecal ledsomeone.Af tersomet i
meanur sewal ked
i
nandt ookmet oar oom, Idi dn' twantt obeher et hough.Iwasf eeli
ngokay, ali
tt
ledi zzybut
okay.Whenwegott ot her oom Il aidont hebedandcl osedmyeyes.
Nur se:Wi l
l youneedanyt hing?
Me:No, not hanks.
Her:Okayi fyouneedanyt hingpl easepr esst hi
sbut tonandIwi llcomet oyou.
Me:Thankyou.
Shenoddedandwal kedout .
.
.
Yandi sa:
Whent henur sewal kedoutofherr oom Iwal kedi n.Shej ustlookedawaywhenshesawme.My
moodj ustdr oppedi nst ant ly,knowi ngt hatIcoul dhavebeent her easonshei sherer eallybroke
myhear t.Knowi ngt hatIcausedhersomuchpai nt oremyhear tintopieces.
"BabeIam sor r
y", Isatont hebedandt ookherhand.
Me:Iam sor ryf orl ying, sor ryf orkeepi ngherpi ctures.Iam sor r
yImetupwi t
hherbehi ndyour
back.Iam sor ryf orbei ngi ncont actwi thher ,I'
llneverdoi tagain.
Her:Don' tdomeanyf avour s.
Me:Iam doi ngt hist osaveourmar r
iage.Idon' twantt ol oseyou.
Shel ookedatme.
Her:Wer eyouwi thher ?
Me:What ?BabenoIwasn' twi thherst handwasam Ipr omi se.
Her:Youl yingYandi sa.
Me:Whywontyoubel i
eveme?Ther eisnot hinggoi ngonbet weenmeandChant el
le, nothing.
Her:Youst illlyi
ng.
Me:Okayt her eissomet hinggoi ngonbet weenus, Iwaswi thher .
Hereyesf ill
edwi tht earsi mmedi at el
y.
Me:That '
swhatyouwantmet osayandi thi
?Sot her eIsai dit.
Her:Getout .
Me:Hai boPhu. ..
Her:Isai dgetout !
Me:Iwasj oki ng!Iwasatmom' shouse!
Her:Thewayyoul ieyouevenf or gotwhatyousai dear l
ier!
Me:Toneyourvoi cedownokay?Webot hnotdeafokay?Toneyourvoi cedownandaddr ess
mewi thr espectIam st il
lyourhusband.
Shef oldedherar msi nf rontofherchestandmumbl edtohersel f.
Me:Doyouwantt ocal lmom t oaskher ?Afterget ti
ngt hisphoneIwentt oseeher(Ishowed
hermynewphone)Iwant edsomeonet otalkt oaboutwhathappenedear li
er.
Her:Andt hewor kshop?
Me:Idi dn'tgot her ebutIwasgoi ngt ogoaf terseei ngyou.
Her:Andyouexpectmet obel ieveyou?
Me:Iam t ellingyout het rut hr i
ghtnowsoyoubet terbel i
evei t,
Iam notcheat ingonyou.Inever
cheat edonyou.Chant elleandIbr okeupmont hsbackbef oreyouandIgotmar ri
ed.
Her:Thenwhyar eyoust il
lcal lingher ?
Me:Becausebabe. ..
becauseChant el l
e, she. ..Shel ostherf atherandshewant edt ot al
kto,
someonewhoknewexact lyhowi tfeltt ol oseaf ather .
Icoul dn'tt ellheraboutQhawenotaf terwhatj usthappened.Icoul dn' tstressheroutagai n,
therewer esomanyr edf l
ags.Icoul dn' tdoi t.Iwasj ustgoingt ohavet ohi dehi mf oracoupl e
ofmont hs.
Her:When?
Me:Theni ghtaf terdadpassedon.
Her:Butyouwer ecal l
ingeachot herwaybef or ethat .
Me:BabeI '
llnevercheatonyoupl easebel i
eveme, beli
evet hatI '
llneverdosomet hingtohur t
you.
Wel lnoti nt enti
onal ly.
Her:Butyouj ustdi dYandi sa.
Me:BabeIam r eal l
ysor ry,Iam butIneedyout otrustandbel i
evet hatIam notcheat i
ngonyou.
Iam notwi t
hanot herwoman.BabeIonl yhaveeyesf oryou.
Her:Idon' tknowYandi sa, Idon' tknowi fIbel ieveawor dcomi ngoutofyourmout h.Youcoul d
belyi ngr ightnow.
Isighed, ser i
ousl ythi skidwasr eallybei ngdi ffi
cult.Idon' tknowi fIcoul dcont inuebeggi ngf or
herf orgiveness, itwasdr aini ng.
Me:Igi veup.
Her:Youhavebeenl yingt omeeversi nceyouputt hisr i
ngonmyf i
nger .
Me:That 'sal it
tleexagger ateddon' tyout hink?LookPhumibabeIunder standt hatyoumadat
mebutpl easedon' tdoubtwhatwehave, itsr eal.Ihaveneverf eltthiswayaboutanyone, Ilove
youPhumi .
Her:Onourweddi ngni ght , wher edi dyougo?Youl ef tthehotelorwhat evert hatthingi scal led.
Me:Iwentt oMandl a'shousef ormyl apt op.
Her:Theni ghtatt hepar ty,di dyousl eepwi t
hher ?
Me:NoIj ustdancedwi thher ,yoursi stercanvouchf orme.Ir espectourmar riageandIr espect
you.Iwoul dneverdosomet hingt oj eopar disewhatwehave.
Her:Onherbi rthday?
Isighed.Dowomenhavememor ycar dsi nt hei rmi ndst ostoreal ltheset hingst heirpar t
ner sdo?
Becauset hewaymywi fewasgoi ngonIcoul dswearshehadt hem st oredi nhermi ndal lthis
ti
me.Andwai ti
ngf oraper fecttimet ounl easht hem al l.
Me:Idi dn'tcheatonyouIdon' tknowhowmanyt i
mesyouwantmet or epeatt hesamet hi ng
overandover .Ther ei snot hinggoi ngonbet weenmeandChant ell
e, Iam notdat i
ngher .
Ndithandawenanj ePhumza.AndIam sor ry.
Shenodded.
Me:Sodoest hismeanyouf orgiveme?
Her:NobutIam wi lli
ngt ot ry.Butonl yi fyout ellmet het r
uth,whydi dyoul ieabouthercal l?
Whydi dshecal lyouatt hatt i
meoft hemor ning?
Itookadeepbr eat handl ookedatt hedoor .Shet ouchedmychi nandt ur nedmyf acet ol ookat
her.
Her:Ther ei ssomet hingyounott elli
ngme.I fyoucheat ingonmepl easet el
lmesot hatwecan
moveon.
Me:Babe. ..(Ikissedherhand)
Her:Iwantyout obehonestwi t
hme.
Okayt hiswasmychance, Ihadt ocomecl eannow.
Me:Ipr omi se,star t
ingnowI 'l
lbehonestwi t
hyou.
Her:Okay.
Shesatup.
Me:I 'dlikeyout omeetsomeone.
Her:Qhawewear etalkingaboutsomet hi ngser iousaphaandyouwantmet omeetpeopl e?
Me:Justt rustme.
Her:Whoi si t?
Me:Bef or eIi ntroducet het woofyoupl easepr omi semesomet hing, youwontover r
eact.
Her:Ican' tpr omi seyout hatwhenIdon' tknowwhat 'sinstoref orme.
Me:Pl easebabet hisisi mpor t
antt ome.
Her:OkayIpr omi se.
Me:I'l
l gogett heper son.
Her:Whoi si t
?
Me:Ndi yezaj ustnow.30mi nutesandI '
llbeback.I '
lltellyoueverythi
ngwhenIcomeback.
Shenodded.
Me:Iloveyou.
Iki
ssedherf oreheadt henwal kedout .Iwentoutt omycar ,Igotonanddr ovetomom'shouse.
.
Iparkedj ustout sidet hegat et hengotof fandwal kedi n.Iguessmom sawmewhenIar r
ived
becauseshemetmehal f
way.
Her:Howi sshe?Howar ethebabi es?Yandi sa.
Me:Shei sf i
ne, stil
langr yatmebutshei swi l
lingtof orgiveme.Thebabi esarefi
ne.
Her:ThankGod!
Me:ThankGodi ndeed.
Her:Canyouseewhatsecr etscandot oyourwi feandmar r
iage?
Me:That '
swhyIam her e,wher ei
sQhawe?
Her:Int herewat chingcar toons.Whatdoyouwantf rom him?
Me:Iam t akinghi mt omeetmywi fe,Irathertakear isknowt hancontinuelyi
ngt oher
.Causing
unnecessar yinsecur iti
es.
Her:Iam pr oudofyou.
Me:Ijusthopeever ythingwor ksout.
Her:Ever ythingi sgoingt obej ustfi
ne,youal sodi dn'tknowabouthi m.
Me:IhopePhumzaunder standst hat
.
Her:Shewi ll.
Ishruggedandwentt ogetQhawe.It hankedmom f orl ookingafterhimthenIdr oveustothe
hospital.

40
Phumza:
Iwassi t
t i
ngi nmyr oom t hinkingaboutt hisper sonYandi sawant edmet omeet.Iwashopi ng
thathewasn' tbr ingingChant ell
eorsomegi rlnjeIdi dn'twantt omeetanyofhi sgir
lf
ri
ends
seriouslyIcoul dn' tdeal witht hat,Iwasj ustgoi ngtogobal l
ist
ic.ThedooropenedandYandi sa
walkedi nwi t
hal i
ttl
eboy, wast hist heper sonhewant edmet omeet ?Hebetterbenothis,Lor
d
pleasedon' ttellmehei shi s.Iheldmychest .
Yandi sa:Babewhat '
swr ong?
Her ushedovert ome.
Me:Wat er .
Hepour edwat eri nagl asst hengavei ttome, It ookaf ewsipst hengavetheglasstohim.
Him:Doyouwantmet ocal ladoct or?
Me:NoIam f ine, Ithinkitst hisstupi ddr ip.Itsmaki ngmedi zzy.
Hef eltmyt emper ature.
Him:Ar eyousur eyouar eokay?
Inodded.Heki ssedmyf or eheadt henbr ushedmyhai r.
Him:Icancal ladoct orifyounotf eelinggood.
Me:Iam f i
neYandi sawi llyoust opwor rying?( Ilookedatt helit
tl
eboybehi ndhim)Tel
l mewho
thelit
tleboyi s.
Him:Nobody, Ijustmethi m downt hehal l
.
Ichuckl edYandi sawasj ustsounbel ievabl e.
Me:Ar eyour eallygoi ngt ol ookmei nt heeyeandl ie?
Hest artedsweat ingandscr atchinghi shead, pacingupanddownt heroom wit
houtbreathi
ng
outawor d.Ihaveneverseenhi m sost ressedandscar ed.
Me:Qhawe!
Hest oppeddeadandl ookedatme.
Him:Idi dn' tknowt hatIhaveachi ldunt ilrecent l
y,IswearIdi dn't
.
Me:Wow.
That '
sal lIcoul dsay, Iwasshockedoutofwor ds.Thi swasbi gandt herewasnowayIwas
goingt oacceptt his.Hemi ghtaswel l bur yourmar riagebecauset her ewasnowayIwasgoi ng
tostayi namar r i
agewi thsomeonewhohadsomanysecr etsandl ivedbyl ying.I fIhadknown
thathewast hist ypeofper sonIwoul dn'thaveopenedupmyhear tt ohi m.
Him:Babe. .
.
Me:It hi nkyoushoul dl eaveYandi sa, youandt hisboy.
Him:Phumzapl easel istent ome, babeIdi dn'tknow.IswearIdi dn' tknowabouthi m untilnow.
Me:Getout !
Ididn'twantt ohearanyofhi sliesanymor ebecausei twaspr ett
ycl eart hathewasl ying.
Him:Pl easel etmet alkokay?Yeah?Hi snamei sQhawe, Idi dn'tknowabouthi m unt il2weeks
ago.Theni ghtaf t
erdadpassedon. ..
Me:Idon' twantt oheari t,Idon' tthinkyoushoul dhavebr oughthi m her e.
Him:Phumi ndiyakucel asthandwasam l i
st en.( Ilookedatt hel it
tl
eboywi t
ht ear si nmyeyes)
WhenImetupwi thChant ellei twasf ormyson, Iwant edt ogett het ruthoutofherabouthi m.It
wasn' tbecauseIwant edt oseeher ,itwasnotf orpl easur e.Andwhenshecal ledt hismor ning,
shewant edmet ol ookaf t
erhi m whi leshewentf oraj obi nter vi
ew.
Me:Hei sChant elle'sson?( henodded)Youl yingt omeagai nQhawe!Youl yingt ome!How
couldyounotknowabouthi m?Howcoul dyounotknowwhenyouandChant el l
ewer etoget her
forallthoseyear s?
Him:I fyoul etmeexpl ain..
.
Me:Kubhal wesi phukuphukuapha? !( i
si twr i
ttenf oolher e? )
Ipointedt omyf orehead.
Him:Phumza!
Her oar ed.Myi nsi desj ustwentcol d, hehasneverusedt hatt oneonmesoi twasal i
ttl
e
terr
ifying.Thel ittl
eboyst art edcr ying, Yandi sapi ckedhi m upandcal medhi m down.
Yandi sa:Whyar eyousuchababy?
Qhawe:Youshout ing.
Yandi sa:So?Manupandst opcr yingl ikeal i
ttl
egi rl.
Asi fheevermansupbutIl ett hem t alki tout .Af teraf ewmi nut esoft alkingt ohi ssonhesat
downont hebedandputQhaweonhi sl ap.Hebr ushedmyt hight ryi ngt ogetmyat t
ention, I
l
ookedathi m andhest opped.
Him:I '
m sor ryIdi dn'tmeant oshoutbutpl easel etmeexpl ainpl ease.( het ol dmeabouthi s
pastwi thChant elleandwhyshehi deQhawef rom hi m, Iwasshockedanddi sgust edbyi tal l
.I
couldn' tbelievet hathecoul ddoal lthet hingshement i
oned, Iwasj ustdi sgust edbyhi m andI
want edhi m outofmysi ghtasi nl ikeyest erday.Hewasabl oodypi gandcheat )Iwasaf rai dof
tel
li
ngyouabouthi mt hesamedayIf oundoutt hatIam af athert ot his4yearol d.Iwasaf raid
becauseIdi dn'twantt oputyourl ifeandt hatofourunbor nbabi esatr i
sk, Idi dn'twantt ol ose
you.
Ifoldedmyar msi nf rontofmychest .
Me:It hi nkyouj ustdi d.
Him:Youcan' tbeser ious.
Me:WhenIgetoutofher eIwantt ogohome.
Him:Babepl easeIdi dn' tknowabouthi m.
Me:Okayyoudi dn' tknowabouthi m, fine.ButIdon' tthi nkIcanst aywi thyouknowi ngthet ype
ofper sonyouar e.Idon' twantt obel iedt oandcheat edonYandi saIam nott hatst rong, Ican' t
takebei nginpai nver ywel l.Idon' twantt obehear tbr oken, Idon' twantt of indmysel fin
Chant elle'sshoes.Losi ngbabi est oapoi ntwher eIcan' thaveanymor e.Ial mostl ostmybabi es,
Ialmostl ostmyl if
ebecauseofyourl i
es.Idon' tt hinkIwantt ost ayi nthist ypeofmar ri
age.
Him:Pl easedon' tleavemePhumza, Iam achangedman.It ryt obeabet termanever ydayand
Iwillcont inuet ryingt il
lIam t hemant hatyoudeser vebutpl easedon' twal koutofmyl i
fe.Don' t
walkoutofourmar r
iage, please.
Ishookmyhead.
Me:Iwantout .Ican' tYandi sa, Idon' tt hinkIcan.
Him:Don' tplease, youwontl oseanypr egnancy.
Me:Al mostdi dYandi sa.
HeputQhawedownt hent ookmyhands.Hi seyeswer etear ing.
Him:Pl easePhumza.St aywi thme, allowmet or edeem mysel f
.
Ishookmyheadwi tht ear sf alli
ngoutofmyeyes.
Him:Rememberwhenwesai dourvows?Forbet ter,f orwor set illdeat hdousapar t
.
Me:WhenIsai dt hem t hisi snotwhatIhadi nmi nd.Yousai dyouwant edahonestmar riagebut
youl i
edt ome.Youwentbehi ndmybackYandi sa,youhur tme.Ther eisat hirdper soninour
rel
at ionshi pnow, Idon' tt hinkIcandot his.
Him:Pl easebabeI 'l
lcutal l ti
eswi thChant ell
e, I'l
lwor konmybadhabi ts.Iwi l
lneverli
eagai n.I
will nevergobehi ndyourbackanddot hingst hatwi l
lhur tyou, Iwi llputyouandourbabi esf i
rst.
Pleasej ustdon' tl eaveme, don' twal koutofmyl if
ebabepl ease.
Me:Youhaveachi l
dwi thherhowcanyoucutal ltieswi thher ?Shewi l
lalwaysbeapar tofour
l
ives
Him:Butpl easedon' tl eaveme.
Thedoorswungopen, DrDavi swal kedi nwi thaf i
leinhi shands.Wewi pedourf acesand
l
ookedathi m.
Dr: Goodday, Ihopeyouf eelingbet t
ernow.
Me:Iam sot hatmeansIcangohome.
Dr: That '
sgood, Ihaveyourr esul t
sher e.
Me:Okay?
Dr: Yourbl oodpr essur ei st oohi gh, younear lysuf f
er edahear tat tack.
Me:ButIam f inenowr ight ?
Dr: Wi thabl oodpr essur et hishi ghIam af raidyounotf ine, youl ivingonhi ghr i
sk.Thenext
ti
met hishappensyouwontbeasl ucky.
Yandi sa:Sowhatar eyousayi ng?Youar egoi ngt okeepherher e?
Dr: Notonl yt hatbuti tsj ustanadvi ceandi tsf oryourowngood.I fyoucont inuet ocarr
yt his
pregnancyyouar egoi ngt ol oseyourl i
fe, Iam sur eitsnotwhatyouwant .
Yandi sa:Ar eyousayi ngsheshoul dabor t?
Dr: Itsf orherownheal th.I fshecar riest hem notonl ywi llyoul oseyourwi febutyouwi lllose
them t oo.
Me:Not hatwonthappen.
Dr: Iam af r aidt hat 'swhati sgoi ngt ohappen, theonl yr easonyouhaveahi ghbloodpr essur eis
becauseyouar ecar ryingmul tipletwi ns.Thenextt i
mei trisest hi shighyoumi ghtloseyourl if
e
soI 'lladvi ceyout ot er mi nat eyourpr egnancy.
Yandi saandIl ookedateachot her ,heshookhi shead.
Him:Ican' tloseyoubabe.
Me:Iam nott ermi nating, Iwontki l
lt hem.
Him:Youcan' triskwi t hyourl ife.
Me:Of cosyouwi llaskmet ot erminat ebecauset hat'swhatyougoodi nr i
ght ?Youhave
not hingt ol ose, youal readyhaveachi l
dr ight ?
Him:That '
sal owbl owbabe.
Me:TakeyoursonandgoYandi sa.Idon' twantt oseeyou, Idon' twantt oseeyoursonokay?
Justgopl ease.
Him:Iam notgoi nganywher ePhumza, Iam st ayingr ighther ewi t
hyou.
Me:Iam i nher ebecauseofyoursel fishr easons.
Him:Butbabe. ..
Dr: Fight i
ngwonthel panyofyou.Ani mpor tantdeci sionneedst obet akenher e,youhavet o
comet oget hert omaket hisdeci sionandsuppor teachot hert hr ough.Yourl i
feisundert hreat,I
will keepyouher ef oraf ewmor ehour sj ustt omoni t
oryourheal thbutyouneedt odecide.Your
l
ifei sont hest akeher e.I 'llleaveyout wot ot alkaboutt hisbutI 'llsendi nayourdoct ortodoa
urinet estonyou.
Inoddedandhewal kedout .
Yandi sa:I '
m sor r y.
Me:I twonthel pme, youhavet ogoIneedsomet imet omysel f.
Him:OkaybutI '
llcomeback, wei nt hist oget her .
Heki ssedmyhandt hent ookQhawe' shand.
Him:Let sgoboy.
Theywal kedout ,Icl osedmyeyesandsai dashor tpr ayert oGod.Ineededgui dance.
.
.
Yandisa:
IbuckledQhaweonhi sseatt hengoti nmi neandst ar t
edthecar .Idroveoutoft hehospi t
aland
call
edChant elle, shepi ckedupal mosti mmedi at
el y.
Her:Isever ythi ngokaywi thhi m?
Me:Yeahar eyoudone?
Her:YeahIwant edt ogetaf ewt hi ngsf rom t hemal lthough.
Me:Noyoucan' t,youhavet ot akeQhawe.
Her:Ithoughtyouwer est illbondi ng.
Me:Nomywi feneedsme.
Her:Isever ythi ngokay?
Me:Idon' tknowCha. ..
ever ythingi snotokay, ever yt
hingi sgoingsowr ongr i
ghtnow.
Her:Youdr i
ving?
Me:Yeah.
Her:Okaydr ivet otheCanalwal kpl easeIj ustpar ked.
Me:Okayshar p.
Ihungupanddr ovet her ewhi let alkingt omom ont hephone, IneededherandIbel i
eve
Phumzaal soneededher .
.
WhenIgott ot hemal lIpar kedandgotof f,Iopenedt hedoorf orQhaweandunbuckl edhi
m.He
gotoffsoIcl osedt hedoorandwewentt oChant ell
eatst eers.Wespot tedherfrom thedoor
andwewal kedovert ot hem, shegotupt ogivemeahug.Webr okei tafterafewandshepul l
ed
met oachai r.Isatdown, shesatdownt ooandt ookQhawe.
Her:What '
swr ongwi thher ?
Me:She. .
.Ican' ttalkabouti t.Shewon' tappr eciatei t
.
Her:Butisshef inet hough?
Me:Yeahshei sgoi ngt obef ine.Ineedaf avourf rom you.
Her:Anything.
Me:Don' tcont actmef oraf ewdays, whenmywi fei sgoodIwi llcont actyouregar di
ngourson.
FornowIhavet ocutal l t
ieswi t
ht hebot hofyou.Iwontbeabl et oseehi mforsomet i
me.
Her:Sheaskedyout odot hat ?
Me:Noshedi dn' t.Iam doi ngt hist ot ryandwor konsavi ngmymar ri
age.
Her:Wowshemustber eallyi mpor t
antt oyou.
Me:Mor et hananyt hing.
Her:Evenmor et hanyourson?Yourownf l
eshandbl ood?Youar ereallygoingtochooseyour
wifeoveryourson?
Me:Don' taskmet ochoose.
Her:Becausewewi lll
oser ight ?
Me:NoChant ellemymar riageandsonwi llalwayscomef ir
stbutf ornowIneedt ofocuson
fi
xingmymar riageokay?Idon' texpectyout ounder stand.
Igotupandki ssedQhawe' sf orehead.
Me:Hi sbagi sathome, mom' shouse.
Her:Youmovedout ?
Me:YeahIhadt ogr owup.
Her:Goodl uckwi thyourmar riage.
Me:ThanksI '
llbeonmyway.Boydaddyhast ogonow, Il
oveyou.
Her:SayIl oveyout oodaddy.
Him:Iloveyout oodaddy.
Me:OkayIpr omi sedhi m pi zza, pleasegeti tf orhi m.
Itookoutmoneyf r
om mywal let.
Me:Thatshoul dbeenough.
Her:Mor ethanenoughact ual ly.
Me:Good.Seeyouar ound.
Her:Yeah.
Inoddedandwentt oChecker st ogetf ruitformywi fe,shemustbehungr y.Aft
erthatIdrove
homet opi ckupmom t henheadedbackt ot hehospi tal.Ifi
ll
edheri naboutwhatt hedoctorsai
d
tousr egar dingourpr egnancyasIdr oveust here, shecal ledandt r
ansf er r
edmoneyi nto
Phumza' smot her 'saccountsoshecoul dcomet oCapet own.Weneededgui dancef rom peopl e
whof ewsomet hingaboutpr egnancy, Iwasconf usedr ightnow.
.
Whenwegott hehospi tal Ipar kedt henwegotof f.Mom t ookt hepl asticandwewal kedin.We
startedatt her ecept iont henheadedt oherwar d, DrNhl aphowasi nt herewi thher .Wegr eeted,
sher epl iedback.Mom satdownnextt oPhumzaandt heyshar edahug.
Me:I sever ythi ngokay?
DrN:Iwasj ustdoi ngsomet estsonyourwi fe.
Me:And?
Dr: Thegoodnewsi syoucant akeyourwi fehomewi thyou, herBPhasgonedown.Andt he
urinet estcameoutcl ear .
Me:Whatwer eyoul ooki ngf ori nherur ine?
Dr: Ifther ei sanypr ot einl eavi ngherbody.
Me:Okaysoi tsnotl eavi ngherbody?
Dr: NoIdi dn' tf indanyt hing.
Mom:Whataboutwhatt hatot herdoct orsaid?
Dr: Mamayourdaught er'slifei satr i
skandi twi l
l cont inuebei ngatr i
ski fshei scar ryingthis
pregnancyt hr ough.Mor eespeci allywhenshedoesn' tmi ndherst r
essl evel anddoesn' tstickto
thel ivingpl anwedr ewup.
Inoddedandl ookedatPhumza.
Mom:Soshedoesn' thavet oabor t?
Dr: Forherowngood. ..
Mom:Mamel akent ombam ( l
istenmychi l
d)Iwantyout ost opscar ingt hesechi ldrent heyar e
notgoi ngt ol oset hesebabi esandshei snotgoi ngt ol oseherl if
e.Shei sgoi ngtocar rythem to
term andgi vebi r
tht oheal thybeaut ifulkids,Idon' tcar ewhatt hatot herdoct orsays.Shei snot
goingt oabor tt heseki ds.
Dr: Iagr eemamabutshehast ost ickt oaheal thyl i
vingpl anandst ressf reelife.
Mom:AndIwi llmakesur eoft hat.
Dr: Thatwi l
lmakeever ythi ngeasy.
Mom:Yousai dwecant akeherhomer ight?
Dr: Yesbutaf tersi gni ngt hi sf orme.
Mom:Yandi sat aket hef or m andsi gnuyekeukumat ha.
Me:Hai bomama.
Itookt hepaper sandsi gnedt hengavet hem t oDrNhl apho.
Mom:Yi zababyyoucomi nghomewi thme, Yandi sat aket his.
Sheshovedt hepl ast ictomychest .Mom canbeabi trudesomet imesi shi .
Mom:Hol di t
.
Me:I '
ll car ryhermamayoucar ryt his.
Phumza:Icanwal kf ormysel f
.
Mom:Heyhewi l
lcar ryyou, youhavenoshoeson.Removet hist hi
ngkal okdoct or.
DrNhl aphor emovedt hedr ipsoIscoopedheri nt omyar ms.
Me:I '
m sor rybaby.
Her :Thul aYandi sa.
Okay!Isai dnomor e, Icar riedhert othecarout side.Mom openedt hef rontpassengerseatand
Iputheri nt hencl osedt hedoor ,wegoti nkenat hi.Ist artedt heengi neanddr oveout .
Mom:Eatbabyyouneedt hest r
engt ht ocarryt hesebabi es.Nomor eabor ti
ont alksorany
stressf ult alks.
Phumza:MamacanIgohome?
Mom:Fornt oni ?Youwantt owal koutofyourmar ri
age?
Phumzal ookedatme.
Mom:Kant iyoushoul dn' tlookathi ml ikethathei syourhusbandandhewi llalwaysbet hat .
Me:Ohmama.
Mom:Thi si snot imet obegi vingeachot herevi llookst her earemuchbi ggerthingst owor ry
about ,likeyourheal thandt hi spr egnancy.
Me:Yesmama.
Mom:Makot i.
Phumza:Mama
Mom:Thobai nhli
ziyobaby.( t
akehear t)
Shenodded.
.
WhenwegothomeIpar kedthenwegotof fandwentinside.Ol
wethual
readybackf
rom
campus.
Mom:Gogetf reshcl ot hesf orhershewi l
lmoveinwithus.
Me:Alone?
Mom:Yesal one.
Me:Butmom. ..
Mom:Nobut sYandi sayourwi feneedsspace.
Olwethu:Whydoessheneedspace?Bhut iwenzeni?(
whatdi dyoudo?)
Me:Hayisukasuphapha.
Mom:Ol wethumakehersomet hi
ngt oeat ,
wenaYandisagetherclot
hessoshecanhavea
bath.
Olwethu:HaibomamaIj ustgotbackf r
om campusIam tired.
Mom:Ol wethu!
Olwethu:OkaymamaI '
llgo.
Mom:Yandi sadon' tj ustst andtheregogetherf reshclot
hes.
Me:OkayIam goi ng.
Mom:Wi l
lyouneedanyt hingbaby?
Phumza:Justmycl ot hesandphonemama.
Me:Okay.
Mom:Gethermor ef ruitsandyogur tonyourwayback.
Me:Wi l
lthatbeall?
Mom:I '
llcal
lyouifIt hingofsomet hing.
Me:Okay.
Iwalkedoutt othecar ,Igotonanddr ovetotheapart
ment .

41
Phumza:
Olwet
hu:Mamawhosebagi sthis?
Shehitt
hebagnextt oheront hecouch.I twasoneoft hosekids'bagswit
halotofcar
toon
decor
ati
ons.
Mom:Ye- Olwet hudi dn'
tIt ellyoutomakePhumzasomet hingtoeat?
Olwet
hu:Butmama. ..
Mom:Hai boOl wet hu!
Olwet
hu:Okaymamaj ustt el
lmewhosebagt hisi
sandI '
l
lbeoutofyourhair
.
Mom:Yourbr other 'sson.
Ohlookslikeever yoneel seknewaboutt hissonbesi desme!
Olwet
hu:Youal readybuyi ngbabycl ot
hes?( referr
ingtome)
Mom:Noi t
swayt ooear l
yf orthem t obebuyi ngbabycl othes.
Olwet
hu:Sowhi chsonar eyout al
kingabout ?
Mom:Yourbr otherhasaf ouryearol dboy.
Olwet
hu:Yandi sahasason? !
Mom:Ijustf oundoutt odaynam.
Olwet
hu:Whoi st hemot her ?
Mom lookedatmet henatOl wethu.
Mom:Chant elle.
Olwet
hu:Chan. .
.Howcomeweonl yf i
ndingoutaboutt hissontoday?Areyousur
eheis
Yandi
sa'schi l
d?
Mom:Hel ooksl ikeyourf ather.
Olwet
hu:Sohel ooksl i
keYandi satoo?
Mom:Yes.
Olwet
hu:Sowher ewashehi dinghim al lthistime?
Mom:Hedi dn' tknowabouthi m unt i
l 2weeksago, wel lthat '
swhathesays.
Olwet hu:Andyoubel ievehi m?Chant ell
ewasal waysar oundhi m sohowcoul dhenotknow?
Mom:Iknowmysonl iesal otbuthewoul dn'thi desomet hingt hati mpor tant.
Olwet hu:Hmm. ..Hemustbehappy.
Mom:Hehasmi xedemot i
ons.
Theyl ookedatme.
Olwet hu:SowenaPhumzahowdoyouf eel aboutt hi s?
Me:Howam Isupposedt of eel ?
Olwet hu:Idon' tknowImeani fIwer eyouIwoul dj ustpackmybagsandl eave, Chant el
leand
Yandi sagowayback.Ther ei sj ustsomuchhi stor yt her eandunf inishedbusi ness.Thi smi ght
bet hei rchancet obet oget heragai n, wow.
Mom:Ol wet hu!
Olwet hu:What ?Iwasj ustsayi ng. .
.
Shegotupandcl appedonce.
Olwet hu:Fat e!Iwoul dn'tbl amehi mt houghhewasf or cedi ntomar riageaf terall.
Ilookedather , lookedl ikeshewasenj oyi nghur tingmyf eelings.
Mom:Wher ear eyougoi ng?
Olwet hu:TomakePhumzasomet hingt oeat .
Mom:Yekamt anam.Nevermi ndI 'l
lmakehersomet hi ngt oeat .
Olwet hu:Butmama. ..
Mom:Isai dl eavei tt ome.
Me:Iam nothungr ymamabutt hankyou.( Igotup)It hinkI '
llgol iedownabi t.
Mom:Don' tmi ndwhatOl wet husai dbaby, hel ovesyou.
Me:Nomamashei sr ightandIwontbl amehi mt oo, hewaswi thherbecausehechooseher .I
can'tcompet ewi tht hat .
Ileftt hem t her e.
"Areyouhappynow? "
"Haibomamasheshoul dn' tt akeever ythingper sonal ."
Iopenedt hedoort oYandi sa' sr oom andwal kedi nt hecl osed.Iopenedt hewi ndowsf orabi tof
freshai rt hengotont hebedwi t
ht ear swi llowi ngoutofmyeyes.Ol wet huwasj ustconfirming
whatIwasal readyt hinking, Ihadt ot akemysel foutoft hi ssi tuationbef or eIreallygotbur nt.I
hadf allensohar df orhi m andIwasscar edofbei nghur t,ofhi ml eavi ngmef oranot herwoman.
Ididn' twantt ol osehi m butIcoul df eel that '
swher ei twasgoi ng, Iwasgoi ngt olosehi m.I
haveneverbeensoaf raidofl osingi nmywhol el if
eunt i
lYandi sa.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Af t
erpar kingmywi fe'scl ot hesandt oiletriesi ntoabagIzi ppedi tt hensatdownont hebed.I
wasn' tsur et hiswast heper fectt imef orust ol i
vesepar ately, notwhenshet hinksthatIam
unfai thf ultoher .It ookherphoneandpagedt hr oughi t,
looki ngatt hepi ctureswet ookt ogether.
Wewer esohappy, whydi dIhavet odest r
oyi tbyal lt hesesecr etsandl ies?It ossedt hephone
ont hebedbef or eIgotemot ionalt hengotupandt ookaf ewofherpai rofshoes, Iputthem i na
smal lbag.Izi ppedi ttoot hent ookt hebi goneandherphone.Iheadedt ot hedoort henoutt o
thecar , Iputt hebagsi nt hebootandgoti nt hedr iver '
sseat .Iclosedt hedoorandst art
edt he
car.Idr ovet ot hemal lfirstt obuyheral lthet hingsshel oveseat ing, chocol ates,chips,
ever ythi ng.Ipai dt henwentoutt omycaranddr ovehome.
.
Igotof faf terpar kingandt ookherbagsandpl ast i
csi nsi de.
"Yandi sa! ",IstoppedwhenIhear dChant ellecal lingoutt ome.Il ookedatherandwal ked
towar dst hem.
Me:Whatar eyoudoi ngher e?It houghtweagr eedt hatwewer en'tgoi ngt obei ncont actfora
whi l
e.
Her :Qhawedoesn' thaveanot herast hmapumpsoIcamet of etchi t
.
Me:It hi nkyoushoul dgobef or emywi feseesyou, shei si nside.I '
llbr ingi ttoyourhousei na
hour .
Her :Iam her er ightnowwhydon' tyouj ustgi vei ttome?
Me:Doyouwantmywi fetoseeyou?Doyouknowwhatwi l
lhappenwhensheseesyou?
Thelastt hingIwant edwasf ormywi fet olandi nhospi talagain.
Her:Yourwi fet hi s,yourwi fet hat!!.
..Iam t al
kingaboutyourson' shealthhere.
Me:Isai dIam goi ngtobr i
ngt hepumpt oyourhouseokay?
Her:Whati fhehasanat tackwhi l
ewewer est i
llwai t
ingf oryou?
Me:Youj ustl ooki ngtomessupmymar riager ight?Iwi llbringthepumpt oyoul aterokay?Just
go,please.
Shechuckl edoutofdi sbelief .
Her:Unl ikeyouIputmyson' sheal thfirst,Idon' tcar eaboutyourst upidwife!AndIsur edon't
careaboutyourst upidmar riage!
Me:St upi d?( sheputherhandsonherwai st)Idar eyout ocal lmywi feandmar ri
agest upid
againI'llblacksl am you!
Her:Ijustwanthi spump!
Me:Whyt hehel lar eyoushout i
ng?Doyouwanthert ohearyou?Wi l
lyoubehappywhenIl ose
mywi feandki ds?
Her:WowYandi sayouar eunbel ievabl edoyouknowt hat?Ir eal
lypit
yyourwi f
ebecause
nothi
nghaschangedwi t
hyou.Youst il
lt hesamesel f
ishbust ardyouwer emont hsago!
Me:Oh!
"Heywhat '
st hisnoi seaboutngoku?Yandi sa!?Chant ell
e? !
",mom shout edasshewal kedoutof
thedoorf ol l
owedbyOl wet hu.
Me:Not hingmama.
Her:Iwanthi sbagandpumpnot hingel se.
Me:30mi nut esChant ellepl ease.
Sheshookherhead.
Mom:What '
swr ongYandi sa?
Me:Pl easebr ingt hebagt hat 'sont hecouchOl wet hu.
Mom:YeChant el l
eyouwontcomet omyhomeanddi sturbourpeacedoyouhearme?
Shelookedatme.
Me:Mci m!
Iwenti nsi det hehousel eavi ngChant ell
et her e.WhenIdi dn'tseePhumzai nthel oungeIwent
tomyr oom.
.
Ifoundheront hebedl ookingatt hewal ls,shej ustremi ndedmesomuchofherf i
rstdayhere.
Shewoul dj ustst areblankl yatsomet hing.
Me:Ibr oughtyourcl othes.
Her:Thanks.
Iputthebagsdown.
Me:AndIgotyourf avour it
es.
Igavehert hepl ast i
cbags, shepoi ntednextt ot hebagssoIputt hem downt oo.
Her:Thanks.
Me:Phumi ...
Her:Ihear dt hebot hofyouar guing.
Isatdownont hebed.
Me:Shewant edQhawe' sbagandast hmapump.
Shenodded.
Her:Ar eyouhappyQhawe?
Me:Whatdoyoumean?
Her:Wi thme?Ar eyouhappywi t
hme?
Me:Of cosbabeIam.
Her:Thenwhydi dyoubr i
ngmybagsher e?
Me:It houghtt hat 'swhatyouwant ed.
Her:Ori tswhatyouwant .Youwantt imewi thherdon' tyou?Youwantt opickupt hepiecesand
conti
nuef rom wher eyoul ef toffright ?
Me:No.PhumzaIam happywi thyou, theonl yt hingconnect i
ngmet oChant elleismyson.
Her:Doyoul oveher ?
Me:NobutIwi l
lal wayscar e.
Her:Di dyoul oveher ?
Me:Atsomepoi ntIt houghtIdi d.
Her:IfIwasn' tint hepi ct urewoul dyoust i
llbewithher ?
Me:It hinkso.
Her:Soyoust il
lloveher ?Youwantherback?
Me:Chant ell
ei sbeaut i
ful andever ythingbuthonest lynoIdon' twantherback.Iwantmywi fe
toforgiveme.
Her:Idon' tthinkIcan.
Me:Okay.
Aphone, herphoner ang.It ooki toutofmypocketandgavei ttoher.
.
.
Phumza:
Tearsf ormedi nmyeyesi mmedi atelywhenIsaw' mom' onthescr een.Iacceptedthecallwith
tearsfalli
ngoutofmyeyes.
Me:Mamam.
Her:Heymyl ove, howar eyou?
Me:Idon' tknowmama.
Her:Youar ecr yingr ightnowar en'tyou?
Iquicklywi pedmyf ace.
Me:Hayimama.
Her:Youar emydaught er ,Iknowyou.Youcan' tl
ietome.
Me:EwemamaIwascr ying.
Her:Why?
Me:BecauseIam af raid.Ever ythingi sf alli
ngapar tmama.
Her:Whati sever ything?
Me:Mymar r
iage, mypr egnancyever ythingi sgoingsowr ongmama.Iam goi ngtolosemy
husbandandbabi esmama, Idon'twantt olosethem butIam goi ngt olosethem.
Hel ookedatmewi thconcer nedeyes.
Her:Tel lmewhathappenedbaby.
Me:Yandi sahasachi l
dwi thawomanf rom hispastmamaandt heyar ecall
ingeachot her
.
Seeingeachot herbehi ndmyback.If ound. .
.
Yandisashookhi sheadsoIkeptqui et .
Her:Phumza?
Me:Mama?
Her:Youf ound?
Me:Hei sgoi ngt ol eavememama, him andChant el
leshar eachild.Somet hi
ngIam notsur eI
cangi vehi m, Imi ghtl osemybabi esmamaandhewi l
lleaveme.
Her:Butt hat'snotwhatIhear d,youwantt oleaveyourhusbandbecauset hingsaregettingtoo
heatedf oryou.
Me:That '
sbecauseIdon' twanthi mt ol eavemef ir
st.
Her:Di dhesayhewi llleaveyou?
Me:No.
Her:Butyetyout hinkhewi l
l?
Me:EvenOl wethusai di t.
Her:IsOl wet huyourhusband?
Me:Nobut .
..
Her:Babywhatdi dIt ellyouabouti nvol vingthir
dpar ti
esi nt
oyourmar ri
age?
Me:Ishoul dn'tinvol vet hem.
Her:Theywhyar eyoul isteningt owhatOl wethuoranyoneel seissaying?PhumzababyIhave
taughtyouever ythingIknowaboutbei ngawomanandbei nginamar ri
age,Idon'tknowwhat
mor eIcando.Mar ri
agei snotal laboutsugarand?
Me:Honey.
Her:Ther ewi llbe?
Me:Har dtimes.
Her:Andwhenyougot hrought hem whatdoyoudo?
Me:Kneeldownandpr ay.
Her:And?
Me:Lookbackt othevowswemadet oeachot herbef oreGod.
Her:And?
Me:Thegoodmemor iesandwhatweshar e.
Her:Andt hen?
Me:Don' tgi veuponmymar riage.
Her:Ther ebabyyousayi ngi tal l.What 'shar di nusi ngt headvi ceIgavet oyou?
Me:MnamamaIknownot hingaboutr elationshi ps, i
tshar d.
Her:Ial soknewnot hingaboutr el ati
onshi pswhenImar r
iedyourf atherbutbabyIl earnt.Do
yout hinkour25year sofmar riagewasal laboutf unandgames?Laught erallthetime?NoI
shedt ear si nt hismar riagebutdoyouknowwhatIdi dwi thal lthet earsescapi ngmyeyes?I
buil
tt hismar ri
ageusi ngt hem.Youl uckyyouhavewonder f ulinlaws, Ihadthewor stbutInever
gaveupnomat terhowhar di twas.
Me:I tsnotabouti nl
awsmama.
Her:Yourf atheral sohadhi sownshar eofsecr etsandugl ypast ,Itoldyout his.ButdidIleave
him?
Me:No.
Her:Anddoyouknowwhy?
Me:Becauset heloveyoushar ei sbi ggert hant hechal l
engesyouf ace.
Her:Exact ly.Yourhusbandhasn' tthr eatenedt ol eaveyour ight ?
Me:Yeah.
Her:Whydoyout hinkt hatis?
Me:Hesayshel ovesme.
Her:Andyoul ovehimt oor i
ght ?
Me:Yeah.
Her:Isn'tyourl ovewor thf i
ght ingf or?
Il
ookedathi m.
Me:It hinki tis.
Her:Thendon' tpushhi m awaymybaby, ever yonehasapastevenyou.Unf or tunat
elyhisis
darkert hanyour sandt hereisnot hingyoucandot ochangei tbutyoucanaccepti t,accept
yourhusbandf orthemanhewasbef or eyouandi sr i
ghtnow.Doyouknowt hatbypushi ng
him awayyout ell
inghimt ogost raighti nt ot hatot herwoman' sar ms?Babyashi swifeyou
havet obewi seandst rong,accepthi schi l
dandl ovehi ml ikeyourownmaybeevenmor ethan
yourown.
Me:Butmama. ..
Her:PhumzaIknowyouar est rongmt anam, Iknowt hatyouar egoi ngtohangont oyourlove
andmar r
iage.Iknowt hatyouar enotgoi ngt ogi veup, younotaqui tt
er.AndIknowt hatyou
aregoi ngt oacceptandl ovet hatl itt
leboyl ikeyourown.Youhaveabeaut if
ulhear tbaby,
golden.Youhavenospacef orhat ei nyourhear t.
Me:. .
.
Her:Butt akesomet i
met oyour sel fandt hinkaboutever ythingwespokeabout .Andwhi leyou
dot hatbeni cet oyourhusband, hel ovesyou.
Me:Thankyoumamai twasgoodt al kingt osomeone.
Her:OkaybabyIwi l
lseeyout omor r
owandwewi lltalkaboutt hebl essingsthatyouar e
carrying.
Me:Youcomi ngher e?Whataboutdad?Bul elwa?
Her:Mybabyneedsmer ightnowsot heyunder stand.
Me:Thankyoumamam.
Her:OkaybabyIl oveyou.
Me:Il oveyout oo.
Wehungup.
.
Yandi sa:Youandyourmot herspokeaboutal ot.
Me:Yeah.
Him:Yousai dt hatyouar eaf r
ai d.
Me:Iam.
Him:Iam notper fectbabe, Ihavemyf l
aws.
Me:Iknow.
Him:ButIpr omi set ol oveandador eyouf ort her estofyourl ife.Imeantever ywor dIsai dthat
dayont heal t
er, Idon' twantt obewi thoutyou.Wi t
horwi thoutt hebabi esyouar emywoman.I
willl
oveyout il
l eter nitybutwear enotgoi ngt oloset hem.
Inoddedandhuggedhi m, hehuggedmeback.
Him:Il oveyou.
Me:Il oveyout ooandIdon' twantt ol oseyou.
Him:Iam notgoi nganywher ebaby.
Webr oket hehug, heki ssedmyf oreheadf ollowedbymynoset henl i
ps.Justapecknj e.
Him:Soar eyoumovi ngbacki n?
Ishookmyhead.
Me:Ist i
llneedspace, Ihavef orgivenyouandIwi l
lmovebacki nbutnotr ightnow.Ihaveal ot
onmymi nd.
Him:Regar dingus?
Me:No, Ij ustf eel l
ikeIam underpr essur eYandi sa.
Him:Okay?
Me:Youhaveasonwi thanot herwomanwhom youst il
lhavepi cturesof .Youl i
edt omeabout
her.Youdi dt hingsbehi ndmyback.
Him:AndIapol ogi ze, IknowIshoul dn' thave.
Me:Butyoudi dYandi sa.Thef actthatyoul iedbabe, thefactt hatyoul i
edst handwasam
makesmequest ional otaboutyouandt het ypeofmant hatyouar e.
Him:I'llwor konmybadhabi tsjustf orgi vemepl ease.
Me:If orgi veyouokay?ButIcan' tfor getaboutever yt hingi mmedi atel
y,don' taskmet o.Iwant
tohealf irst ,Iwantt ol oveyoursonl i
kemyown.ButIcan' tloveandaccepthi mi mmedi atel
y,I
am stilldisappoi ntedandhur t.Iam goi ngt hr oughahar dt ime, Iam bei ngt ol dbydoct orst o
abortmyver yf i
rstpr egnancybecauseIwontl ivet ogi vebi rthtot hem.Pl easedon' taskmet o
l
oveandacceptanot herwoman' schi ldr ightawaypl ease.
Him:Babe, heyl ookatme.( hecuppedmyf acei ntohi shands)pl easedon' tcr y,please.( he
wipedmyt ear susi nghi sthumbs)Iam notaski ngyout oaccepthi mr i
ghtawayyouar eal so
human, youhur tt oo.Ihadt i
met owr apmyheadar oundt hei deaofhi m exi sting.Itwashar df or
met oo, that '
swhyIunder stand.Iunder standt hatyouneedt i
met oyour sel fbutpl easedon' t
shutmeoutngobayougoi ngt obel i
vingher ewi thoutme, west il
lacoupl e, west il
lmar riedand
Iloveyou.Iwi l
lwai tt i
llyour eady.
Me:Thankyou.
Him:Not hankyou.
Me:Sohowdoesi tf eel beingapar ent ?
Him:Idon' tknowIcan' texpl ainthef eel ing.Youknowt hatt odayhecal ledmedad?Ican' t
explai
nt hej oyandexci tementIf eltinmyhear t
,itwasapr i
celessmoment .
Ismi l
edbecausehewasgl owi ng.Hewasj ustsoexci ted, Idon' tknowwhatIwoul ddoi fIlost
thesebabi es.Het ookmyhandandki ssedi t.
Him:Butf ornowmymai npr iori
tyisyouandt hem.
Me:Makehi m apr ior i
tyaswel l,
hei sasi mpor tantasmeandt hem.
Her ubbedmyt ummy.
Him:Ican' twai tt of eelt hem ki ck.
Me:Ican' twai ttoseet hem, t
omeett hem.Ican' twai tt ofeelt hesamewayyouf eeli
ngr ight
now.
Him:Justacoupl emor emont hsbabe.
Me:Butwhati fitdoesn' thappen?
Him:Itwi llhappenmyl oveyouhavet obel ievet hat.
Me:I '
mt ryingYandi sabuti t
shar d.
Him:Youhavet ot ryhar derbabe, ifyoudon' thavef aiththatyouwi lll
ivet ogi vebi rththeni t
wonthappen.Youhavet ohavef aith,youandmebot h.
Inodded.
Him:Toensur et hatyouhavet oeatsomet hingheal thy.
Hegotupandt ookoneoft heplasti
cs.Hetookouta1kgyogur tandgavei tt
ome.
Him:I'
llgogetyouaspoon.
Hekissedmyf or
eheadt henwalkedout.Igotuptocheckwhatel sehegotme, heboughtmea
wholelotofchocol atyandsweetst uff
.Whent hedooropenedIwentt ositdownont hebed.
Him:Whatwer eyoudoi ng?
Ishookmyhead.
Me:Not hing.
Hesmi l
ed.
Him:Ifyousayso.
Hegavemeaspoon.
Me:Am Igoi ngtoeatal one?
Him:Youwantmet oeatwithyou?
Me:Wel li
fyougetaspoonmaybe.
Helookedi nhispocket sthentookoutaspoon.
Him:Iwashopi ngyouwoul daskmet ojoi
nyou.
Il
aughedashej oinedmeont hebed.Hesatbehi ndmet henopenedt hetub,Il
eanedagainst
hischest.Hekissedmycheekt henscoopedaspoonf ul
lofyogur tandfedme.WasIdr i
ving
myselfmadwhenIwant edtoleavehim?

42
Yandisa:
Afterhour sofj ustsi t
tingandt alki
ngt omywi feIr emember edt hatIhadt ogosomewher e,I
couldn'tkeepdel ayi ngt his.Ihadt ointroducemysel ftothest uffatt hebarandcl eani toutas
dadaskedme.
Me:BabeIt hinkIhavet ogonow.
Her:Okay.
Me:Whydoyoul ookl ikeyoudon' twantmet ogo?
Her:Ohnoi t
sf ine, Ijustt houghtyouwer egoi ngt ost ayfordi nner.
Me:AahnobabeIhavet ogot ot hebarandi ntroducemysel ft othest uf f
.
Her:Okayt hen.
Me:YeahbutI '
llseeyout omor row,Ipromi se.
Shesmi l
edandnodded.
Me:Okayl etmer unke.Il oveyou.
Shenodded, Ipeckedherl i
pst hengotupandwal kedoutt hedoor .Iwentt ot helounge,
Olwethuwassi tti
ngont hecouchwat chingt vandZet huwasi ntheki t
chencooki ng.Iguess
shewasbackf rom wor know.
Me:Nomdade!( sister )
Zethu:Heybhut i
!
Me:Whendi dyougetback?
Zethu:Whenyouwer ei nyourr oom wi thyourwi f
e.
Me:Okayyouhadagooddayt hough?
Shecamet ot hel ounge.
Zethu:Yep!Bhut itomor rowIhavet ogoshoppi ngf ortheedr esssocel aubekhonapl ease,Iwas
goingtogowi t
hdadandmom butnowhei sn'
ther e.
Me:I t
sf inesi siIwi llmakemysel favailable.Butar eyousur eyouwantt omar r
ythisguy?
Zethu:Dadwant edmet osoIwoul dli
ket ohonourhi swi shesbesi desl obolahasal readybeen
paid.
Shewasal soget tingi ntoanar rangedmar ri
age, herf i
ance( Bucul eJukuj a)recit
edin
Johannesbur gbecauseofwor k.Soshewasgoi ngt omovet hereaf terherweddi ng.Appar entl
y
wegr ewupt oget her ,Icouldn'tevenr ememberhi m butIcoul dt ellhewasagoodguy.Hecame
totownwheneverhewasf reejusttoseeandspendt imewi thZet hu.
Me:Asl ongasyousur esi s.
Zethu:Iam.
Me:Okay.I 'l
lbeher eat10i nthemor ninguber eadypl ease,tellmom f uthi.
Zethu:Okayt hanks.
Shewentbackt of inishwhatshewasdoi ng.
Me:Shar p.Ma- Olmandi kulumei ndl ebebef or eIgo.( I'
dl iket ot al ktoyou)
Ol wet hu:Whatdi dIdo?
Me:Emnyangopl ease.
Shegotupandwal kedoutf ir
st ,If ollowedaf terher .
Me:Whatdi dyousayt oPhumza?
Her :Whatdi dshet ellyou?
Me:Shedi dn'tt ellme.Shewast alkingt ohermot her.
Her :Oh.
Me:Mamel a( l
isten)Ol wethuyouar emysi sterandIl oveyousomuchbuti fyoucont inue
act ingl ikeabi t
cht owar dsmywi fet henyouandIwi l
lhaveaser iouspr oblem.
Her :Wowsoyouswear i
ngmebecauseofher ?
Me:Iunder standt hatyouandPhumzaar eoft hesameageandshemi ghtbeyoungert hanyou
byacoupl eofmont hsbutr i
ghtnowshei syourseni or.Youwi llgi vehert hesameamountof
respectyougi vet ome, i
fyouf ai ltor especthert henpl easer espectmymar riage.
Her :ButIdor espectyourmar riage.
Me:Notwhenyout r
yingt odest royi tyounot , yout oldhert opackherbagsandl eavebecause
youdi dn' tseemewi t
hheranymor e.
Her :Iwasj ustj okingwi thher .
Me:Car efuloft hewayyouj okeandwhen, mymar ri
agewasal r eadyont her ockswhati fyou
finishedi t?Whati fsher eallylef tme?
Her :I'
m sor rybhut iIwasn' tthinki ng.
Me:Youhavet ogr owupOl wet hu.
Her :Isai dsor ry.
Me:I fyoudoi tagai nLwet huyouwi llr
eal l
ygeti tf r
om me.
Her :IswearIwont ,Ipromi se.
Me:Okaybuti fIdo. ..
Her :Ipr omi se.
Me:OkayIl oveyou.
Her :Iloveyout oobhut i.
Weshar edahugt hensai dourgoodbyesandIwentt omycar .Igoton, startedt heengi nethen
dr ovet ot hebar .
.
Igotof faf terpar ki ngandwal kedi ntot hebar .Somegent sgr eet edmef rom thedoor ,theywer e
sittingar oundt het ableandsni ffingcocai ne( somet hingt hatneverhappenedi nt hisplacewhen
dadwasst illalive) .Theywer en' tevenaf raidt hatcopsmi ghtcomei nandar r
estt hem oreven
shutdownt hepl ace.AnywayIl ett hem bef ort het imebei ngandwentt ot hemanager .
Me:What supbr o?
Hi m:Moj ayoubr o?
Me:Shar p!Canyout urnthemusi cdownIwantt oaddr essever yone, getmet her estoft hestaff
.
Hi m:Al right !
Het ur nedt hemusi cdownt hengott herestoft hest af f.
Hi m:Goodeveni ngIam sor rytodi sturbyourpar tybutIhaveani mpor tantannouncementt o
make.Asyoual lknowt hatmyol dmani sgone, webur i
edhi ml astweek.I twasasadt imeand
stillisaver ysadt imef ormyf ami lybutt hat'
snotwhatIwant edt ot alkabout .First
lyIwoul d
l
iket ot hankeachandever yoneofyouf orkeepi ngthi spl aceopenandr unningwhi lewewer e
stillgr i
evi ng.( theynodded)Fort hosewhodon' tknowmemynamei sYandi sa, thesonoft he
l
at eMzoxol o.Whendadpassedonhel eftthispl acef ormet or unsoyouar el ookingatt henew
bossandowneroft hisplace.Ever ythingwi l
lgoonasnor malbutt herewi llbeaf ewchanges
andadj ust ment st hatIwi llbemaki ngt ot hi
spl ace.Butei thert hant hatever ythingwi llber anas
usual .Fi rstlyther ewi l
lbenodr ugssmokedl iket hati nt hispl ace, I
'dl i
ket okeept hispl ace
cleanandwel lrespect edj ustl i
kewhendadwasst il
lalive.
"Whoi she? " ,
theguywhowassni ff i
ngasked.
"Theboss' sson"
"Let schoonhi m aboutt hatideawecameupwi th"
Me:I 'l
l choonwi t
hyour i
ghtaf tert his,okayever yonecangobackt owor k.Tur nupyourmusi c
andl etever yonehavef un.I '
dl i
ket ohaveast af fmeet ingwi thyouguysat8i nthemor ni ng.
(referri
ngt ot hest uff.Theynoddedandgotbackt oit.Iwentovert ot heguyswhower esni f
fi
ng
cocai ne, theyof feredmeachai rsoIt ookaseat )
Me:Sowhatdoyouwantt ot alkabout ?
"Firstl
yI 'l
lint roduceour sel ves, I'
m Li nda.That 'sMzwayi , SqongaandJason" .
Jason:Wewor kf oryourdadatt hepanelbeat er swor kshop.
Me:Okay.
Sqonga: Yeahwebr oughti nbusi ness, Iam sur eyouknowt heki ndofbusi nessyourf atherwas
i
nvol vedi n.
Me:Hi jacki ng?
Linda:Sho, wewer ehi smostl oyalsol dier s.
Me:Ohyouwantsomesor tofappr eciat i
ongi ft
?Icanor gani seit.
Linda:Nonowewoul dj ustl i
ket oaskf oryourper missi ont odoal ittl
esomet hingt opayour
respect st oyourf at her ,ourboss.Hewasl ikeaf athert oust oo,het ookusi nwhenwehad
nowher et ogosowewoul dl iket ot hankhi m.
Me:Sowher ewi l
lyoubedoi ngal loft hi s?Andwhen?
Mzwayi :That 'sanot hert hing, wewoul dl iket odoi trighther e.Tomor row.
Me:I nt hisbar ?
Jason:Yesdon' twor ryi twi l
lbedecent .
Me:I sn' tittoomuchshor tnot i
ce?
Jason:Nonosi r,wehavebeenpl anni ngt hi ssincehepassedon.Ever yonewasi nformedand
becauseyourf atherwasapeopl e'sper sont het urnupwi llber eallygr eat.
Inodded.
Linda:Wewoul dal sol iket hef ami lyt obet heret oo,justt oshowt hatt heysuppor tt
hisi dea.
Me:OkayI 'l
lt alkt ot hemanagerandmymot her.
Linda:Themanagerandst affar eal soi nont his.
Me:Al rightIguessyouhaveever ythingpl annedout .
Sqonga: Wedo, ther ewi llber ef r
eshment sanddr i
nks.
Me:Don' tfor gett obr aai hel ovedi t.
Sqonga: Jahof coswewi l
lbr aaiandcel ebr atehi slife, alsot hanki nghi mf ortakingusi n.
Me:I 'l
lt alkt omymot herbutIam sur eshewonthaveapr oblem wi t
hanyoft hat.
Jason:Thankyouboss.
Me:Shar pI 'llcal lthemanagert ol etever yoneknowi fever ythingwi llbeonornah.
Them:Al rightboss.
Me:Okaypl easegetr idofwhatyousni f f
ingyouknowdadhat edseei ngt hatbei ngdonei nhere.
Them:Shoboss.
Me:Shar p.
Igotupandt ookmyl eave.Idr ovet omom' spl acef ordi nnerandt alkt othef ami l
yaboutt hi
s,
mom di dn' tmi ndsoIgavet hem t hegoahead.Zet huwasf orcedt ocancelt hedr essshoppi ng,
west i
llhadt imet odoal loft hat .Anywayaf tereat i
ngIsai dbyet oever yoneanddr ovet othe
apar tment .
.
.
Phumza:
Zet hu:Whyi shel eavi ngyoubehi nd?I st her et roublei npar adise?
Me:Noi tsnot hingl i
ket hat .
Mom:Phumzaher eneedst or est .
Zet hu:Oht her ei snor est ingwi thYandi sa?
Mom:Hayihayihayi Zet hukukusakwant oniokut hethayo?
Zet hu:Hai bomamaever yoneknowst hatt heydoi ngi t.
Mom:Yuhyouar er ottenmt anam yuh!Iwonderwhatyourhusbandwi l
lthinkaboutt his.
Ol wethu:Maybehei sasdi rtyasshei s.
Zet hu:Hayi wet huhei sn' tdi rtyinf acthei sbor ingwi tht hecapi t
alB!
Me:Whatdoyoumeanhei sbor ing?I sheapast or?
Zet hu:Hayi hei sjustabusi nessman, abor i
ngonef ort hatmat t
er .Hehasnosenseof
romanceorst yle,ever ythi ngabouthi mi sbusi nessl ike.Eveni fhei sn'ttalkingbusi nesshest i
l
l
talkslikehei sdi scussi ngsomebusi nesspr oposal .
Mom:Waf akukubhor ekasani !(youwi llbebor edt odeat h)
Wel aughed.
Olwet hu:Atl easthei sl oaded.
Zethu:Hewant smet obeahousewi fe, canyoui magi ne?
Mom:Idon' tknowhowyouwi lldot hatyoubecauseyouandyourbr ot herlovewor ki
ng.
Me:Atl easthedoesn' tt alkl i
keherman.
Zethu:Hayi keshamel owahecan' tdi sti
ngui shbet weenbusi nessandper sonal .Hei sbor ing
guysyoudon' tunder stand!Al waysf l
yi ngt oout sidecount r
iesf orbusinessesandconf erences.
Me:Youknowhi sever ymove?
Zethu:I tsl ikehemademehi sPA, hecal l
sever ydayshame.
Olwet hu:Andhef liesi nt oseeher .
Me:That '
ssweett hough.
Mom:Idon' tknowwhyshei scompl aining.
Zethu:I 'm not .
Me:Soyougoi ngt obeahousewi fe?
Zethu:Iagr eedt oi tbecauseheaskedni celyandI '
llbeget ti
ngmymont hlyallowance.
Olwet hu:OhmyGodcanIhavehi m?
Zethu:No!
Herphoner ang.
Zethu:Speakoft hedevi l.
Shegotupandwentt oherr oom.
Me:Sohowdoeshel ook?CanIseehi sphot o?
Olwet hu:Wedon' thavehi spi ct ures, hecamedi rect l
yt oseeandpr oposet oZet hu.Hewasal so
thereonyourweddi ngday.
Me:OhIt houghtever yt hinghappenedl i
kemi ne.
Mom:Hayit heywant edt odot hingsdi ff
erent l
y, Iguesst hiswaywor ksf ort hem.Yourf ather
didn'twantust odi stur byourst udi es.
Me:OhandwenaOl wet hu, whenar eyouget t
ingmar r
ied?
Mom:For tunat elyandunf ortunat elyf orhershewontbegoi ngi nthetypeofmar ri
aget hather
sibli
ngsgoti n.
Olwet hu:Whyi si tunf ortunat ef orme?
Mom:Becausewewontknowt het ypeoff ami l
yyouwi llbemar ryi
ngi nto.
Olwet hu:Ohwel lIam f inewi t
ht hat .
Mom:Iam notf inewi tht hat ,Iwantt oknowever ydetail aboutt hem.
Olwet hu:Hehumama.
Zethucamebackf r om herr oom, shehadahugesmi l
eonherf ace.
Zethu:I 'mf lyingt oJozinextweek.
Me:Asi naer oplanef lying?Skyhi ghf lying?
Zethu:Yeahandi twi l
lbemyf irstt ime.
Me:Ar en' tyouscar ed?
Zethu:Justal i
tt
lebutIcan' twai t.
Me:Idon' tthi nkIcandot hatmna.
Wecont inuedt alkingaboutnot hi ngr eal ly.Mom gi vingusadvi cesaboutmar ri
ageand
everyt hingt henwewentt obed.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Whenmor ningcameIgotupandwentt ogetr eadyf ort heday.Iwor ekhakipant sandwhi te
vestt hebl ackf or mal shoes.Ibr ushedmyhai rthenwentt otheki t
chenf orsomet hi
ngt oeat ,
thisplacewasn' tt hesamewi thoutmywoman.Imi ssedheryohIwi shhermot hercant alkher
i
nt ocomi ngback, IknowIsai dIunder st
oodbuthayit hismor ningever ythingwasdi fferent .I
couldn' tlivei nt hisapar tmental lal one.Anywayaf tereat ingcer ealIri
nsedt hebowlt hent ooka
bottl
eofwat erandmademywayt ot hedoor .Myphonebeepedi nmypocket , Itookitout .It
wasamessagef rom Phumzaaski ngmet obringhersomet hingt owearatt hememor ial
service, Iwentbackt oourr oom andl ookedf orsomet hingappr opri
atet owearandshoest henI
mademywayoutt hedoor .Ical l
edChant ell
eonmywaydownst ai
rs,shepi ckedupwhenIwas
aboutt odr opt hecal l
.
Her:Whatdoyouwant ?
Me:I '
m sor ryaboutyest er day.
Her:Wi llt
hatbeal l?
Me:Todayi sdad' smemor ialser vice,Iknowi t
sshor tnoticebutpl easegetQhawer eady.I
wouldl ikehimt obet her e.
Her:Mom wontal l
owt hat.
Me:Pl easeCha. .
.Pl ease.
Her:Wasn' tthatsupposedt obedonebef orethef uner al?
Me:Yeahbuthi sst affwant stosaybyet ohi m sincet heydi dn' tmakei ttothef uneral
.
Her:OkayI '
llbat hhi m.
Me:ThankyouChaI '
l
lpickhi m upi nahour .
Her:Al ri
ght.
Shehungup.Iputmyphonei nt hepockett hengoti nt hecar ,Istartedthei gnit
ionanddr ove
home.
.
WhenIgott her eIpar kedt hengotof fwithPhumza' scl ot
hes.Iwenti n,greetedOlwethuwho
waswonder ingar oundt heki tchen.
Me:Whatar eyoul ookingf or?
Her:I'm maki ngbr eakf ast.
Me:HaMandl achangedyou.
Her:Hayisuka!
Ilaughedandwentt omyr oom.
Me:Yourcl ot hesmyl ady.
Her:Thankyou.
Shet ookt hem t henbabyki ssedme.Isatont hebedasshet ookof fthegown.
Me:Babe.
Her:Yes?
Me:CanQhawecomewi thus?
Shel ookedatme.
Me:Pl easeyout wodon' thavet ot alk.
Her:Andhi smot her?
Me:Shewontcome.
Her:Itsf i
neQhaweyoudon' thavet oaskf ormyper mi ssion.
Me:Ij ustthoughti twoul dbeappr opri
atei fIdoso.
Her:Itshisgr andf ather'smemor ialIcantsaynot othatbesi deshei sfami l
y.
Me:Thankyouf orunder standi ngst handwasam.
Her:Sohowwi llhegett her e?
Me:Wewi llpickhi m uponourwayt here.Ar eyouf inewi tht hat ?
Her:Of cos.
Ismi l
ed.Iknewshewasgoi ngt owar m upt ohi m.Whenshewasdoneget tingdressedwewent
tothel ounge, Ol wet huser vedusbr eakfast.
.
.
Phumza:
"Herei syourf ood" ,Olwet husai dasshepl acedapl at eonmyl ap.Il ookeddownatt heplate,
what '
st hi
skengoku?Theeggswer ebur ntsowast hepol ony, thet omat owasovercooked.I
didn'
teveneateggsandsheknewt hat,thesmel lwasal itt
leupset t
ing.
Olwet hu:Heyshowal itt
leappr eci ati
onIt ookmyt imeandmadet hat.
Mom:Ipi tyt hemant hati sgoi ngt omar ryyou.
Olwet hugiggl ed.
Olwet hu:Hayiwet humamaheknowsIcan' tcook.
Mom:Suchanembar rassmentLwet hu!Whatt ypeofwomanar eyou?
Olwet hu:Notawi f
emat erial .
Yandi sa:Clear ly.
Theyl aughedt henl ookedatme.
Mom:Babywhyar en'tyoueat ing?
Igotupandputt hef oodont het able, Icoul dn' thol di tinanymor e.Ijoggedt othebat hr oom and
openedt het oi l
etseatt hent hrewup.Af tert hrowi ngupIf l
ushedt hengotupandr i
nsedmy
mout h.Iwentt ot heloungeaf tert hat .
Yandi sa:Ar eyouokay?
Me:Idon' teateggsanymor et heyupsetmyst omach.
Mom:I 'llmakeyousomet hingel se.
Me:NomamaI 'l
ljustt akeanappl eandbanana.
Yandi sa:Ha. ababeyouhavet oeatyoucar rying6l ifesi nyou.
Zet hu:Si x? !OhmyGodYandi sayouar esowr ongt hough!
Olwet hu:Heh!Howdi di thappen?
Irolledmyeyesather .
Olwet hu:Ubhut iyi mboza!( hei st heboss/ man)
Wel aughedsi noYandi sa.Theywer esoexci ted, theywer eevenpr aisinghi m.Fi nallyitwas
ti
mef orust ogo, weal lwentoutt othecarl ocki ngt hedoor sbehi ndus.Wegoti nthecart hen
Yandi sast ar t
edt heengi neandwedr oveout .
.
.
Yandi sa:
Whenwegott oChant elle'shouseIpar kedout si det hegat eandIgotof f.Itookoutmyphone
andcal ledher .Shedi dn'tt aket hecal lbuti nst eadwal kedoutwi thQhawe.Theywal kedt owar ds
thegat et henoutt hegat e.
Her :HeyIseeyoubr oughtt hewhol ef ami ly.
Me:Wear edr ivingt ot hevenue.
Her :Okaysayheyt odaddy.
Him:Hi daddy.
Me:Heybi gboy, howar eyou?
Him:Good.
Her :Lookaf termyson.
Me:Hewi llbet akencar eof .
Her :Shoul dIt rustyourwi fewi thhi m?
Me:It r
usther .
Shenodded.
Me:Saybyet omommy.
Theyki ssedt henIt ookhi shand.Iopenedt hedoorf orhi m andOl wethut ookhim.Icl osedt hen
wentt ogetont hedr i
ver 'sseatandst ar t
edt heengi ne.Idr oveust odad' sbar .
.
Wegotof fwhenwegott ot hebarandgr eetedever yone, i
ntroduci ngmywi feandsont o
ever yone.Thepr ogram st artedwhenwear rivedsoever yonet ookt heirseat s,Lindawel comed
ever yoneandt hankedusf orshowi ngourf aces.I tmeantal ottot hem, hecal l
edmom upt osay
af ewwor dsaboutdad.I twasunder standabl ebuti twasst il
laf reewoundt oherandt her estof
ussowhenshegotemot ionalupt her eIgotupandt ookoverf rom her .Thent hepl atform was
opent ohi sst affandcr ewmember s, theyhadonl ybeaut ifulthingst osayabouthi m.Iguesshe
reallylef tamar konear th, theydescr i
bedhi schar act ert hewayweal lknewhi m;st rong,
fri
endl y, car i
ng, amanofhumour ,whospokehi smi nd, amanofsecondchancesbutst illdidn't
takecr apf rom anyone, andamanofhi swor d( heneverwentbackoni t
, never).Anyt hingaf ter
theser vi ceSqongaaskedever yonet ogoout sidebecauset heywant edt oper f
or m ashor t
farewel lshowf orhi m soweal lwentout side, Imysel fwant edtoseet his" show" .Itookmywi f
e
andson' shandandst oodadi st ancef rom t hecar s,lookedl i
ket heywer egoi ngt ospint hem.
Linda, Sqonga, Mzwayi andJasonhadbot tlesofdad' sf avor it
edr ink,Hennessy. ..Theyt oolsi ps
thenpour edt her estont hegr oundsayi ngaf ewwor dst oMzoxol o.Theygoti ntheircar s, vw
golf sandst artedspi nning.
Phumi :Yourf atherwasl oved.
Me:Hewas.
Phumi :Andt hisi scool .
Me:Iam i mpr essedmysel f.
Her:Heiscute.
Me:Who? !Oneofthedrivers?
Shelaughed.
Her:Qhawe,heiscute.
Me:Oht hanyousthandwasam.
Aft
ertheshortshowpeopl ewer eser vedmeatanddr inks.Mom wantedmetotakeherhome,
shewant sgoi
ngtostaylongsoIt ookmywi feandsonal ongwithme.Zet
huandOl wet
huwere
goi
ngt ocomebackwi thMandl aandLubanzi .IwantedtotakeQhaweshoppingandPhumzato
asalon,Idi
dn'twanthermot hert oseeherwi t
hthatoldhairst
yle.I
twasallmessynow,I
wantedhertoseethatIwast akingcar eofherdaughter.

43
Phumza:
Mom ar rivedonal atet hatni ght ,Yandi sawentt ofetchherf rom thet axirankaf terspendi ngt he
whol edaywi t hmeandhi sson.Hewasacut ebutqui etsweetl it
tleboy, Godknowst hatI
want edt of allinlovewi thhi m butIcoul dn't.Istil
lneededt ime.AnywayIwashappyt oseemy
mom, Imi ssedheral ot.Wedi dn'thavet imet otalkorevenspendsomet imet ogetherbackat
homebecausewewer ebusywi ththef uner alpreparations.Af tereatingIhel pedZet hut aket he
dishest ot heki tchen.
Yandi sa'smom:Ihopeyouwontwasht hosedi shes.I tshardt okeepyourdaught erdown.
Mom l aughed.
Mom:Shei sal otofhel pt hatone.
Yandi '
smom: Butsheshoul dbecar eful nottoover wor kher self,
especi allynow.
Oht hesewomenl ovet owor ry,Ifeltfi
nenowandIwi shIcoul dgetbusywi thsomet hingr ather
thansl eepal lday.Zet huwashedt hedi shesandIwi pedt hem, YandisaandOl wet huwer e
keepinguscompanybutt heywer ebusypl ayingcar ds.Af t
erwashi ngt hedi shesYandi saandI
wentt oourr oom.
Yandi :Ihavet ogonow.
Me:Oh.
Yandi :Ithoughtt hisi swhatyouwant ed.
Inodded.
Him:Thenwhyar eyoul ooki ngsadnow?
Me:BecauseYandi saIdon' twantt obesepar atedf r
om you.
YeahIhadmyi nsecur i
ties, ImeanIdi dn'tbel i
evet hewhol eexst ory.Ididn' ttr
usthi m.Why
woul danyonekeept heirex' spi ctures?I tdoesn' tmakeanysense.
Him:Thencomehomewi t
hme.
Me:Ist i
llwantsomet imet omysel f
.
ButIwasn' taboutt ogohomej ustbecauseIwant edt owat chhi sever ymor e.Iwant edt oget
overmyi nsecur iti
eswi thouthi m beingi nf rontofmyeyes, Iwant edt ot r
usthi m agai n.
Him:Ar eyousur ebecausehomei snothomewi t
houtyoust handwasam.
Me:YesbabeIam sur e, givememor et i
me.
Him:Okayst handwasam butpl easecheerupokay?
Ifakedasmi le.
Him:Icanseeyouwhenyouf akingi t
.
Ichuckl ed.
Him:Muchbet t
er ,
Il oveyou.
Me:Il oveyou.
Hecuppedmyf aceandki ssedmyl ips, Ikissedhi m backal mosti mmedi ately.Weshar edaki ss
andbr okei taf tersomet ime.
Him:Di dIt ellyouhowbeaut ifulyoul ookwi ththisnewhai rstyle?
Ihadavi r ginweavedoneandmyhusbandsai dIlookdr opdeadgor geous.
Me:Ami lliont imes.
Hesmi l
edandki ssedmyf orehead.
Him:Getsomer estne?
Me:Iwi ll
, dr i
vesaf ely.
Him:Iwi ll.Wal kmeout .
Het ookmyhandandpul l
edmeoutwi thhim.Hesai dbyet oourpar entst henIwal kedhi m out
tohi scar .Weki ssedt henhegoti nt hecaranddr oveof f.Iwenti nsi dewi thtearsinmyeyes, I
don' tknowwhyIwascr yingt hough.Iwentst rai ghtt omyr oom andchangedi nt
oani ghtdr ess
thengotundert hebedcover .If allasl eepi mmedi at ely.
.
>>>ADAYLATER<<<
Yandi sa:
Iwokeupear lyMondaymor ni ngandgotr eadyf orwor k,itwasaboutt imeIgotbackt owor k.
AndImustsayIwashappy, Ilovedmycar eer .Iwor ebl ackpant s, whi teshirtandbr ownf ormal
shoes.It uckedi nt het -
shi rtthenwor eabr ownbel tandbl ackt ie.Ibr ushedmybeadt hen
packedmywor kbag, Itooki twi thmet ot heki tchen.Imademysel fcer ealandat ef astthen
wentt or insemymout hwi thLi sterine.Af terthatIt ookmybagandwentdownst air
st omycar ,I
putt hebagi nt hebackseatt hengoti nt hedr iver 'sseat .Ist art
edt heengi neanddr ovet owor k.
.
WhenIgott her eIpar kedonmypar kingspacet hengotof f
.Itookmybagf rom t
hebackseat
andl ockedt hecart henwentwal kedt owar dst heent r
ance.Iwal kedi nandsawChant ell
esi tt
ing
ont hewai tingcouchesi nt her ecept ion.Whatwasshedoi ngher e?Iwal kedovert oher .
Me:Chant elle.
Her :Hey.
Shegotupandf ixedhercl ot hes.
Me:Whatar eyoudoi ngher e?I sever ythingokayathome?
Her :Ever yt hingi sokayathomeandIam her ef orwor k.
Me:Idoubtt hatt her ear eanyopenpost s.
Her :Imeani tsmyf i
rstdayatwor k.
Me:What ?
Her :Iwor kher enow, I'l
lbeyourassi st ant.
Me:What ?Idi dn'tknowt hatIneededanassi stant .
Her :Yourbosst houghtyoudi d.
Whywasn' tIt oldaboutt his?Ican' twor kwi thChant elle!IfPhumzaf indsoutshewi llj
ust
divor ceme.
Pret ty( recept ionist):Goodmor ningMrDl ami ni ,wel comebackt owor k.
Me:ThankyouPr ettyi stheMrSmi thi n?
Pret ty:Yeshei s,heaskedmet ot ellyout ogoseehi m assoonasyougether e.
Me:I nhi sof fi
ce?
Pret ty:Yessi randyout ooMi ssAdams.
Me:ThanksPr ettypl easeor gani semeast rongcupofcof fee,justt hewayIl i
keit.Br i
ngitt omy
officei n15mi nut es.
Shenodded.Il ookedatChant ell
e.
Me:Af teryou.
Her :Idon' tknowwher et heof ficei s.
Me:Kant iwher edi dyoudoyouri nterview?
Her :Int heHR' sof f
ice.
Me:Okayf oll
owmet hen.
"Hei tamyout tie!"
, Mandl ashout edashewal kedi nt ot hebui l
ding.Iputupmyt humbandl edt he
wayt oMrSmi th'sof fice.Whenwegott her eIknocked, hesummonedmei nsoIopenedt he
door .
Me:Ladi esf i
rst .
Shewal kedi nandIwal kedi naf terher .
MrSmi th: OhIseeyouhaveal readymet .
Me:Of cosweal readymetbutIdon' tneedanassi stantIcanhandl emywor kl
oadver ywell,you
knowt hat .
MrSmi th: Thatwasbef oreyoust ar tedyourownbusi nessont hesi deandhadf ami l
yaf fairsto
attendt o, sitdown.
Isatdown.
MrSmi th: Iam notsayi ngyoucan' tcope, youar emybestconst ruct ion/projectmanagerbut
youar enotgoi ngt obeal waysher ewhenweneedyouandMandl acan' talwaysst andi nf or
you.Weneedhi mt odohi swor kaswel l,wehavedesi gnsandmodel sf orhi mt obui ld.
Present ationsf orhi mt opr epar eandpr esentonyourbehal f.That 'swhyIt houghti twasagood
i
deat ogetyouanassi st
ant ,someonet ohel pyou.I nt hesamet i
mel ear nf rom oneoft hebest
i
nt hebusi ness.
Me:Iam her enowMandl awontneedt ost andi nformeordomywor k.AndIdef i
nitelydonot
needanassi stant .
Him:Doyouhaveanyi deahowmanypr ojectphaseswehadt oputonhol djustbecauseyou
weren' ther et of i
xt hepr oblemsmetbyour ,yourcont ractors?
Me:Iwasi nhospi tal.
Him:AndIam notdi sput i
ngt hat .All Iam sayi ngi st hatweneedsomeonewhowi l
lbeour
middl eman, someonewecanaccessandcanaccessyoueasi ly.
Me:Don' tyout hi
nkyoushoul dhaveconsul tedwi thmef i
rst?Don' tyout hinkIshoul dhavea
sayinwhoIwor kwi th?Doessheevenhaveanexper i
ence?Shedoesn' t.
Him:Ther ei snot hingwr ongwi thMi ssAdams, shei sfreshoutofuni ver sityandshei swilli
ng
tolear n.Idi dn'tthi nkandIst illdon' tthi nkyouwi l
l haveapr oblem wor kingwi thher .Mandl a
evenputi nagoodwor dforher .
Me:Mandl a?Whatdoesheknow?Doyouhonest lyt hinkIhavet imet ot eachandbabysi twi t
h
mywor kload?Yousai dityour selfshei sf reshoutofuni versitysheknowsnot hingaboutt he
fi
eldi tself.
Him:Justgi veherl i
ghtr esponsi bi l
iti
esandseehowshedoest hem, comeupwi thideasonhow
tofixt hepr obl emsourconst ruct erscameacr osst oget her.Justwor kt oget her.
Me:Ican' twor kwi thher .
Him:Iknowt hatshei syourexbutIal sohappent oknowt hatyoucanbeapr ofessi onal.Thisis
awor kpl ace, shei syourcol l
eagueandst udentnowIexpectyout obehavepr ofessi onall
yand
respecteachot her .
OfcosheknewbecauseChant ellewoul dcomeseemeatwor kever yt i
meheevencal l
edmet o
theof ficet ocompl ai naboutherbei ngher eallthet i
me.
Me:WhatcanIsayyout hebi gboss.
Him:That 'smor elikei t.Thesear eyourf il
esandr epor tsonwhatwentwr ongonsi te,Iwi l
lneed
yout oat tendt oi tassoonaspossi bl e.Wecan' taf fordanymor edel ays, theyar ecost ingus
thousands.
Me:Yessi r.
Him:I tsgoodt ohaveyouback, Ihopeyourmi ndi snotonhol iday.
Ichuckl ed.
Me:I tsgoodt obeback.
Him:Ir ear rangedyourof fi
ce, Ihopeyouwontmi nd.
Me:Ij usthopeyoudi dn'tdist urbanyt hing.
Him:Notatal l,wej ustputi nanext rat ablet oaccommodat eher .
Me:Okaynopr oblem.Letmegett owor kthen.
Him:I 'm notst oppi ngyou.
MrSmi thwascoolt hough, heneverwant edhi spr esencet ointimi dat eus.Anywaywewal ked
outoft heof ficeandwentt omyt omyof fice.
.
Whenwegott her eshet hrewherbagont het abl eandl ookedatme.
Her:Di dyouhavet odot hat ?Di dyouhavet osayal loft het hi
ngsyousai d?
Me:Dowhat ?
Her:Di scr edi tmei nf rontofyourboss!Youmademel ookandf eelsost upi d.
Me:Idi dn' tmeant obutdi dyouhavet oappl yf orthi spost ?Bemyassi st ant ?Doyouknowhow
badt hi swi ll l
ookt oPhumza?
Her:Youknowwor kingf ort hiscompanywasal somydr eam Yandi sa,itsagr eatpl atformt o
gainexper ienceandt her espectt hatIdeser vei nourwor kfield.I fIhavet owor kclosel ywith
youj ustt ogetaheadandgai nsomer espectt henIam f i
newi thi t.Irespectyouandyour
mar ri
age.Iam nott ryingt ocomebet weenyouandyourwi fe,thisi sst rict l
ybusi ness.
Me:Bul l!!Youar eupt osomet hing, Iknowyouknowt hatIknowt hatyouar eupt onogood.
Her:Iam notupt osomet hingYandi sa, Iam j ustt ryingt omakeanhonestl i
vingf ormeandmy
sonj ustl i
keyou.
Me:IknowyouandIdon' tt rustyou!
Her:Youmeanyoudon' tt rustyour sel f,Iam notupt oanyt hing.
Me:Thenwhydi dn' tyout ellmet hatyouappl iedf ort hispost ?Whydi dn'tyout ellme?
Her:BecauseIknewyouwer egoi ngt otellmenott oappl yf ori t.BecauseIknewt hatyouwer e
goingt ot ellyourbossnott ohi reme.
Me:Damnr i
ghtIwasgoi ngt odot hat !
Her:Wow.
Me:YouandIcan' twor ksocl osel yt oget her !
Her:Becauseyourwi fewontappr ove?SoIshoul dl etagr eatoppor tuni typassmebyj ust
becauseyourwi fewontappr ove?Ishoul dputmyl ifeonhol df oryourwi fe?Don' tIdeser ve
somet hi nggoodt oo?Don' tI?( shesni ff
edandwi pedt hef allingt ears)Yandi sawhydoyouhat e
mesomuch?WhathaveIeverdonet odeser vet hissor toft reat mentf rom you?Wasl ovingyou
reall
yasi n?Whydoyouhat emesomuchhuh?
Itookherhandsandpul ledhert ome.Idon' tknowhowIal waysmanagedt omakehercr ybutI
hatedi t.Idon' tknowwhyIwassuchaj erkt owar dsher ,IguessIwasusedt oi tandi t
happenedsoef f
or tl
essl y.
Her:Don' tIdeser vet obehappyt oo?Don' tIdeser vet obel ovedandl ookedaf tert oo?
Me:Chant ell
e.
Her:Theonl ymanandper sont hatl ovedandl ookedaf termei sgoneYandi saokay?I thurts
becauseIcan' tevenr unt ohi mf orcomf ortanymor e.Andwhenyoudot his. .
.Iknowt hatyou
aremar ried,Iknowt hatyoudon' tl ovemeanymor eandIdon' twantyout obutpl easespar eme
thepai n.Spar emet hei nsul ts.Spar emet hehat r
ed.
Me:Hey. .
.I'm sor ry.I '
m sor ry.
Her:I'mt ryi
ngYandi sabutever ydayi sachal lengef orme.Ihavet owakeupandacceptt hat
myf irstandonl ylovei smar riedt oanot herwoman, Ihavet ocomet ot ermswi tht hef actthat
allt
hoseyear st oget herwer enot hing.Ihavet oadmi tt omysel ft hatyouneverl ovedme, Ihave
toconvi ncemysel ft hati tsf i
ne, t
hati twi l
lpass.ThatIwi llbehappyagai n.Doyouknowhow
muchi thur tst ol oseyourf i
rstl oveandt ruel oveal latonce?Andhaveyourf irstlove, someone
whoi smeantt ounder st andt hepai nt hatyougoi ngt hroughdoal loft heset hingst hatyoudo?
Youf launtyourwi fei nmyf aceever yday, Ihavet oputmyl ifeonhol df orher .Wasn' titenough
whenIdi ditf or7year s?Al lthoseyear sYandi sa,allthoseyear sIputmyl if
eonhol df oryou.
NowIhavet odoi tf oryourwi f etoo?
Icareful l
ywi pedhereyes.
Me:Nonoyoudon' thavet o, youdon' thavet o.Youar egoi ngt omoveonwi thyourl if
eandIwi ll
l
etyou.Iam sor ryf orbei ngaj erkr ightaf teryourf ather '
spassi ng, Iknowyoul ovedhi m mor e
thanlifei tself.AndIoutofal lpeopl eshoul dknowt hatmuchandshoul dn'tbeaj erk.Iknow
thatyout ryingt oputonabr avef acer ightnow, comi ngt owor kwi t
hsomeonewhohur tandst i
ll
continuest ohur tyou.AndIam notmaki ngi teasyf oryou.
Her:Younot .
Me:Wehavebeent hroughsomucht oget herChant elleandIhaveal soputyout hroughal ot,
your i
ghtyoudodeser vehappi ness.Youdodeser vet his,aj obt hatyoul oveandwor kingfora
companyyoual wayswant edt owor kf or .Andyoual sodeser veanapol ogy, Iam sor ry.Ihope
youcanf orgiveme.
Shenodded.
Me:Idon' tknowwhyIal waysr uinyourmakeupbutIhat emysel ffori tandI '
lltryt obeabet ter
mant oyout oo.
Her:Don' tmakeanypr omi sesYandi sawebot hknowt hatyouar eal lergict okeepi ngt hem.
Ichuckl ed.
Me:Iam gl adt hatyoucanst illfi
ndhumouri ni t
.
Her:Iam t r
yingYandi saGodknowsInevert ookbet r ayalf r
om youeasi l
ybutIam t rying.And
i
t'sli
keyoudon' tappr eci at et hat .
Me:Ido.
Her:Youhaveaver yf unnywayofshowi ngi t.
Me:I '
m sor ryf rom t odayIpr omi set omakel ifeeasyf oryou, nomor et alkingaboutPhumzaand
putti
ngyourf eelingsl ast .Youdeser veabr eakaf tergoi ngt hroughal loft hatpai n.
Her:ThankyoubutIknowyouwi llbr eaki t.
Ismi led.
Me:Wi pet hoset ear s, fi
xyourmakeupandl etsgett owor k.
Shenodded.
Me:Thatwi llbeyourdesksoyoucanmakeyour selfcomf ortable,I'
llgogetuscof feesol ong.
Her :Thanks.
Igaveherapackoft issuest owi peherf acet henIwal kedoutbumpi ngintoPr et
tyoutsidet he
doorwi thourcof fee.
Me:It houghtyouf orgot .
Pr et
ty:For getyousi r?Never .
Iopenedt hedoorf orher , shewal kedi n.
Me:Puti tonmydeskpl ease.
Sheputi tont hedeskt henl ookedatChant elle.
Me:Thatwi llbeal lPr ettyt hankyou.
Shenoddedandwal kedout .
Me:Joi nmeonmydeskwhenyouar edoneIwantust ogooversomet hing.
Chant elle:Ar i
ght .
Ipour edmysel facupofcof feeandsugart hensatdownbehi ndmydeskandst i
rredthecof f
ee.
Iswi tchedonmyl apt opandcheckedoutt hepi ctur essentt omebyMandl a.
Me:Youneedt oseet his, It hi
nki twi l
lbeeasyt osol vethis.Idon' tknowhowt hesepeopl e
affordt omakesuchsmal lmist akes.Thepr ojectshoul dbecompl et edbynextweeki fweget
ourr epor ttot hem byt heendoft oday.
Her :I'
llbet her ewi thyoui nasecond.
Shequi cklyf i
ni shedwhatshewasdoi ngt henj oi nedme, shel i
stenedcar eful
lytowhatIwas
sayingandj otteddownpoi nts.
"Looki ngcosyoverwor k" ,Mandl asai dwal kingi ntoourof fice.
Me:Wear epr of essi onal s.
Hesatdownonachai racr ossus.
Hi m:Chant el l
ear eyouokay?
Shel ookedathi m andnodded.
Hi m:Youl ookl i
keyouhavebeencr ying.
Her :NoIwasn' t
.
Hi m:Don' tl iet ome, youknowyoudon' thavet ol iet ome.
Me:Mandl aChant ellei sf ine, shewasn' tcr ying.
Hi m:Ohsoyouwer er esponsi bleforhert ears,agai n?
Me:GeezIdon' thavet imef ort his.
Igotupandl ookedf orsomet hingt hatwasn' tther e.
Hi m:Whenwi llyoust op?
Her :Mandl aYandi sadi dn' tdoanyt hingt ome, ser iousIam f ine.
Hi m:Ifyousayso, Icameher et ocheckont het woofyou.
Me:Youdi dn'thavet o.
Hi m:Ihadt omakesur et hatyoudi dn'tt urnt hisof ficei nt
oahot elr oom likeyouusedt o.
Ichuckl ed.
Me:Youhavet imet ospar e?
Hi m:Sur e, fornow.
Me:Canyout akeChant ellet ot hesi te,sheneedst ot akethist othem.Wewantt hisprojectto
becompl etedASAPsowecangetbonuses, Ineedt hatmoney.
Hi m:Ihavenopr obl em wi ththat .
Me:Thanks, you' llexpl ai nt ot hem whatt heirnextst epwillbe.Bel oudandconf i
dentwhenyou
talk,i
tsabi tnoi syt her e.
Her :ButYandi saIcan' t, youknowIcan' texpl aint his.Whati ftheyaskmequest i
onsIcan' t
answer .
Me:Tr yto.
Her :Whati fi tal lgoeswr ong?Youhavet obet her e, Ihavet ohearyouexpl ainitfi
rstthenIcan
try.
Me:Youwantmet ohol dyourhand?
Hi m:I'll
hol dyourhandr el ax.
Me:Thankyou, nexttimeI '
llgowi t
hyou.
Her:Okay.
Me:Goodl uck.
Her:BecauseI '
llneedit.
Me:You' l
lbeokayj ustbecar efulwiththoseshoes.Don' tgoanywher enearthebuildi
ng,Idon'
t
wantyout ogethur t.Callthem t oasaf eplaceandexpl ain,
wewi l
linspectitt
omor r
ow.Oht el
l
them thatI'
llorganiset heelect r
icalengineertodot het ouchupssoIneedt heroofcompleteby
today.
Shenoddedandgotup.
Me:Iwantar eportbackwhenyoucomeback.
Him:Youmessi ngwi ththeki dnow.
Me:Iam ser i
ousChant el
le.
Her:Yessi r.
Shet ookherbagandwal kedoutwi thMandl a.Isighedoutl oudl
ythenwentt hroughthefil
es
Smi t
hgavet ome, wewer epi tchingforacont ractinSwazi l
andinamont h.Theywantedt o
buil
danewmal landSmi t
hwant edust opi t
chf orthecont r
actandbui l
dit.Thi
sjobwas
exhausting.Af t
ergoi ngthrought hefil
esIdeci dedt ocallPhumzaandj ustcheckonher .Maybe
Iwasf eeli
nggui l
tyofsomet hingIhadnocont rolover.

44
Yandi sa:
>>>acoupl eofhour sl ater<<<
Theywal kedi ntot heof ficelaughi ng, Isatupandl ookedatt hem.Mandlawascarryingabrown
Wi mpypaperbagandChant el
lewascar ryi
ngjui
cetakeaways.
Her :Ihopeyouhungr ybecausewegott akeaways.
Shegavememyj uiceasMandl amadehi mselfcomfortable.
Her :Yourf avour ite, fruitcockt ail
.
Me:Thankyou.
Her :Pleasur e.
Shet ookoutt het akeawaysf r
om t hepaperbagandgaveusoneeach.
Me:Thanks.Sohowdi ditgo?
Her :Hesavedmyass.
Me:Whywhathappened?
Him:Shef rozei nf rontofever yone.
Her :Butt hankGodt hathewast her e,thankyou.
Him:Anyt imesi s.
Ilookedatt hem l ost, theywer en'ttelli
ngmeanyt hi
ngr eal
ly.
Her :Het ookoverandaddr essedt hem.
Me:Butdi dyouatl eastsaysomet hing?
Him:Shej ustgr eet ed.
Me:Wow.
Her :Wor dswoul dn'tcomeout .
Me:Youst illstumbl e?
Him:Don' tbehar donheri twasherf i
rstday.
Me:Whatdi dIsayngobaIj ustsai dwow?
Him:Youshoul dhavebeent heret oshowherhowyout al
kanddealwi ththecont
ractor
s.
Me:Andi thiyouwer et her etodoal loft hat?
Her :Seriousl yguys?
Wel ookedather .
Her :Ineedt ogot ot hel oo.(shegotup)Ibet t
ercomebackt oal i
ghtmood.
Me:Youknowwher ei tisright?
Iforgott hatIhadt ogi veherat our ,introducehertoourcol leaguesasoneofusnowbef or
e
theymadeassumpt ionsaboutus.
Her :Irememberi tfrom l asttime.
Inoddedandshewal kedout .
Me:Whatar eyouupt o?
Her :Whatdoyoumeanwhatam Iupt o?
Me:Recommendi ngherast hebestcandi dat efort hisposi tiont oMrSmi thwhenyouknow
aboutourhi stor y.Youknowt hatwecan' twor ktoget herMandl a.
Him:Iknowt hatbutIf eltl ikeIowedhert hatmuch, It ookherf ather '
slife.Andsi ncehehas
beengonet hatwomanhasbeent hr eat eni ngt ost ri
pherof fever ything.Shecamet ome
desper ateandi nt ear s, herst epmot herwasgoi ngt ot hrowherandyoursonouti fshedi dn't
fi
ndaj obASAP.Shecoul dn' taskyout oputi nagoodwor df orhert oyourbossbecauseyou
wer en' tgoi ngt odot hat .Iwant edt omakeherhappyagai n, Iwant edt omakehersmi lesot hat'
s
whyIdi dwhatIdi df orher .
Me:Noyouwant edt opl ayher owhi leyoumakemel ookbad, thishadnot hingt odowi thyou
want i
ngt ohel pt hem.Sheshoul dhavecamet omei fshewasi ntroubl e.
Him:Soyoucoul dt ellhert ol ayof fyoubecauseyoumar ri
ed?That '
swhatyouhavebeen
sayingr ight ?Onemi nut eyoucoolt owar dsherandt heot heryouj ustcol dandt ell
inghert o
backof f.
Me:Oh!Sot het woofyouhavebeendi scussi ngme?
Him:Sheneededashoul dert ocr yonandyouknowt hatwegowayback!
Theygr ewupt oget hert hat 'swhathemeanswhenhesays" wayback" .
Me:Bul l
!!Yout rasht alkingmebecauseyouwantt ogeti nherpant s.Iknowyouhavebeen
wai ti
ngf ort hisdaybutpl easedon' tusemynamet ogetl aid.Thi swi llhur tmymar riage.
Hechuckl ed.
Him:Youbei ngst upi dr ightnow.Thatgi r llovedyouandshest il
ldoes, shewoul dn'ttrashor
allowanyonet ot rasht al kyounomat terwhatyoudot oher .Sheneededsomeonet ot alkt oand
Iwast here.
Me:Thesamewayyouwer ef ouryear sago?Youdi scr edit
edmet omygi rlonl ybecauseyou
wer ej ealousandyouwant edt of uckher ,whatwi llstopyouf rom doi ngt hesamet hingnow?
Him:Igeti t!Youst illangr yatmef orami st aket hathappenedal ongt i
meago.Youst i
llloveher
don' tyou?
Me:Don' tbest upid, Idon' tl oveChant elle.
Him:Thenwhyar eyouact i
ngal ljeal ous?
Me:Iam notj eal ous.Ij usthaveal ott ol osebyyouract i
ons
Him:Youj usti ndeni al.Il oveChant ellel ikeasi ster,alwayshave.Iwoul dn' ttryt opul lthatmove
onhereveragai n.I t
sj ustt hatyouwer esuchaj erkt owar dshert hatIwant edt omakeher
forgetaboutyou, i
twasast upi dt hi ngt odobutIdi dandIwasver ygl adwhenshesl appedme
becauseIwoul dhaver ui nedagoodbr ot hersi sterr elationship.AndIapol ogizedf ormyact i
ons.
Iam nott ryingt ogeti ntoherpant s.Andyououtofal lpeopl eshoul dknowt hatIwoul dn'tli
e
aboutt hat .Ihaveal waysbeenst raightwi thyouespeci all
ywheni tcamet osuch.Thi swasj ust
mel ooki ngoutf oraf r
iend, noshadybusi ness.
Inodded.
Me:IsupposeIoweyouanapol ogy, Ishoul dhaveknownbet ter.
Him:Yeahshei slikeal ittlesi sterman, Ihat eseei nghercr yespeci all
ybecauseIam t heone
whoputi nagoodwor df oryout oher .Andt hat'
swhyIgetmadwhenyoudoal loftheset hings
toher .Shedeser vest obehappyt ooandt hi sjobwi llmakeherhappy.
Me:IknowandIam sor ry, itsj ustt hatt hi swontl ookgoodt oPhumza.
Him:NahmanIcan' tbel ieveyouwoul dassumet hewor stofahonestsi t uat i
on.Andyououtof
allpeopl eshoul dknowt hatmyr elat ionshi pwi thChant ell
eisst r
ictlysist erbr other .
Thedooropened, Chant el lewal kedi n.
Her :Ar eyouguyscoolnow?
Him:Yandi sai sj ustaj er k.
Hegotupandt ookhi sst uf f.
Her :Wher ear eyougoi ng?
Him:Tomywor kspace.
Me:I fyouwantt osul kt hengo.Wehavewor ktodoanyway.
Him:I '
llseeyouaf t
erwor k.
Her :Okayenj oyt her estofyourday.
Him:Yout oo.
Hewal kedout .Chant ellel ookedatmet hansatdownonherchai r.
Me:Saywhat evert hat '
sonyourmi nd.
Her:Irathernot .
Me:Okay.Whenyouar edoneI '
llgiveyouat ourar oundt heplaceohandcheckyouremai l
s,we
haveameet ingt omor row.
Her:Wi t
h?
Me:Thet eam andMrSmi t
h, readt heemai lIsentt oyou.
Her:Okay.
Me:Shar p.
.
Therestoft hedaywentwel l,wewer ebusywi thwor kthewhol edaytil
litwastimetogohome.
Igotupandzi ppedmybag.
Me:Packupi tst i
met ogohome.
Her:Iam al mostdone.
Me:OkayIguessI '
llbeseei ngyout omor r
owt hen.Don' tforgett hatwewi l
lbeonsi t
ef i
rstthi
ng
tomorrowmor ning.
Her:Okay.
Me:You' l
llockup.
Her:Hadon' tl eaveme.
Shegotupf rom herchai randt ookherbag.
Her:Letsgo.
Shewal kedoutf i
rstandIf oll
owedaf terher,lockingt hedoorbehi ndme.
Me:Sohowi sQhawe?
Her:Hei sgoodt hanksagai nf ort heclothes.Hewant edt oweart hem onhisfir
stdayatt he
daycare.
Me:AahIwi shIsawhi m.
Her:Itookaf ewpi ct uresofhi m, Icansendt hem t oyou.
Me:Thankyou.
Shetookoutherphoneandsentt hepi ct
urest omevi awhat sapp.Ithankedhert henlefther
withMandl a.Igoti nmycaranddr ovehomest art
ingatt heapar tmenttohaveashower ,it
s
beenal ongday.Af t erget t
ingdr essedIdr ovehomet oseemywomanandf ordi
nner.
.
WhenIgott her eIpar kedt hengotof f
.Iwal kedi nt
ot hehouseatt hesamet imeasOl wet hu
walkedout .
Me:Wher ear eyougoi ng?
Shepoi ntedt ot hegat e, Mandl a'scarhadj ustpul l
edup.
Her:I'
l
lbeaf ewmi nut es.
Me:Alright.
Iwalkedi nandgr eet edt henwentt omyr oom becauset hat'
swher emom sai dPhumzawas.I
foundherl yingont hebedbutshesatupwhenshesawme.
Me:Sthandwasam.
Isatdownont hebedandpeckedherl i
ps.
Her:Howar eyou?
Me:Gr eatandyou?
Her:I'
m okay.
Me:Andt hebabi es?
Her:Theyf ine, ourmot hersar espoi li
ngus.
Me:Youdeser vei t.
Her:Hmm. ..What '
sbot heringyou?
Me:Not hingwhy?
Her:BecauseIcanseet hatyounotf i
ne.
Me:Iam j ustt ired.
Her:Ohyeshowwasyourf i
rstdaybackatwor kafteral onghol i
day?
Me:Babeyouknowt hatIl oveyour i
ghtandIwoul dn'tdoanyt hingtohurtyou?
Her:Whatdi dyoudo?
Me:Ihadandst il
lhavenocont roloveri t
.
Her:Yandi sa.
Me:Pr omi set hatyouwontbemad.
Her:Youscar ingme, whatdi dyoudo?
Me:Pr omi seme.
Her:Ipr omi se.
Me:Chant el l
ewor ksatmywor kpl ace.
Her:Sowhathappened?
Me:Not hi nghappenedbet weent het woofusandnot hingwillhappen.
Shepul ledherhandsoutofmi ne.
Her:Whydi dn'tyout ellmet hisbef ore?Youhavebeenl yi
ngt omeYandi sa?
Me:Nobabeandpl easecomedown.Shest artedt odayandt het hingisshei smyassi stant.
Her:Whatdoyoumeanshei syourassi stant ?
Me:Wewi llbewor kingcl osel ytoget her. ..
.
Shegotup.Igotupt ooandhel dherwai st.
Me:Babe, st handwasam Idi dn'tknowt hatt hiswashappeni ng.
Her:Soyoumeant ot ellmet hatyoudi dn' tknow?ThatyourbossorMandl adi dn'
tt ellyou?
Me:Iswearst handwasam.
Her:Whyshoul dIbel i
eveyou?
Me:St handwasam, myl oveIam notl yi ngr ightnow.IknowIl i
edbabebutIam notl yi
ngt hi
s
ti
me.Iwassur prisedandshockedasyouar e.
Her:Idon' twantyout owor kwi thherYandi sa.
Me:Idon' twantt owor kwi thherei therbutIhavenosayovert his,mybosshasdeci ded.
Her:Howcl osel ywi llyouwor kt oget her?
Me:Weshar inganof fi
ce, wegoi ngt o..
.
Her:Anof fice? !OhmyGod! !
Shebr eat hedi nandoutacoupl eoft imes.Igent lycuppedherf ace,shehel dmyhands.
Me:Babet her ei sabsol utelynoneedf oryout of eel insecure.
Her:Whyyou?
Me:Becauseshewant stobeapr ojectmanagerl i
kemeandmybosst hinksi twillbeagood
i
deaf orhert olear nf r
om me.Heal sot hi nksIneedanext r
apairofhands.
Her:Whydoesshehavet oshar eanof ficewi thyout hough?Whyi sshe. .
.
Me:Babecanyounotdot hispl ease?Don' tst ress.
Her:Shei saf teryou!Shewant st odest roymymar riage!Youshar eachi ldwi thher, youhaveso
muchhi st or y.St handwasam Iam scar ed, Idon' twantt oloseyou.
Me:Andyouwontbabe, youwont .
Shekissedmyl ipspassi onat ely, i
twast hat" Iwantyou"ki ndofki ss.Ifoundi treall
ysexy.
Her:Doyoupr omi se?
Me:Ipr omi sebabe.
Sheslippedherhandsundermyt -shi r
tandgent l
yr anherf i
ngersupmyspi ne.Whatwast hi
s
ki
ddoi ngt omet hough?Mymanhoodst if
fenedr ightawayandIpul l
edhercl osert ome.Icoul d
hearthel aughi nhert hroatasshehel dmyst rongar ms.
Her:Youwontpul lanymovesonher ?
Me:NoIhaveawi fet opul lmoveson.
Itr
iedt oki ssherbutshegent l
ypushedmyheadback.
Her:Youwontevenl ookather .
Me:Ipr omi se.
Shesmi ledandpul ledmyt -shirtup, Itooki tof f.Sheki ssedthet att
ooonmyl eftbreastt hen
l
ookedupatme.
Her:Yandi sa. ..
Me:Myl ove.
Ipeckedherl ips.
Her:Youwontt hinkofher ,youwontent ertainher .
Inoddedandpul ledherup, shewr appedherl egsar oundmywai standgi ggled.
Her:Nowor kingl ateandeat i
ngl unchwi thher .
Iplantedasof tki ssonherneck, Iwant edt hi swomansobadbutshewaspl ayinggameswi th
me.
Me:Yesbabe.
Her :Yandi sa.
Me:Babe.
Her :Ifyoudar et hi nk, t
ouchorevenent ertai
nherIwontt akeitlyingdown.Youwi l
lseewhatI
am madeoft hatday.
Ilookedatherl ikewhoa!Il iket hisf eist
inessIseer i
ghtnow, i
nf actIfindi tsexy.Ichuckled.
Me:Yout hreat eni ngme?
Ilaidheront hebedandt ookof fherdr ess,nowshewasl eftwithapant yandbr a.
Her :No, Iam t ellingyout hatIwi llnotbecheat edon.Iwi llnotbet akenf oraf oolandyou. .
..
(sheki ssedmyshoul der)wontbr eakyourpr omi ses.
Iunhookedherbr aandt ooki toff.
Me:Iwontbr eakmypr omi ses.
Ikissedherl ipsbutshepushedmeback.
Her :Doyoupr omi se?
Me:Ipr omi se.
Isai dt akingof fherpant y.
Her :Nowwecanseal t
hisdeal .
Me:Fi nal l
y.
Iqui cklyt ookof fmyshor tsandboxer s.Ipositi
onedmysel fbutshepushedmeback.
Her :Nogoi ngbackaf terthi s.
Me:Nogoi ngbackmyl ove.
Shesmi l
edandki ssedmyl i
ps.
"l
ockt hedoor ",shespokebet weent heki ss.
Me:Don' tbel oud.
Shegi ggl ed.Iwentt ol ockt hedoort henwentbackt omywomanwhowaswai ti
ngf orme,I
pulledherl egst owar dsmeandi nser tedmysel f.Shemoanedandhel dmywr i
sts.
"shhh" ,Ibentt oki ssherl i
pst henmadepassi onatelovet oher.
.
.
Phumza:
Ipeckedhi sl ipst hengotof fhi m.Isl eptnextt ohim, Iwasoutofbr eathandhungr y.Het urned
tosl eeponhi ssi det hencur l
edhi sar m overandar oundmybody, pull
ingmet owardshi m.
Him:Il oveyou.
Me:Il oveyout oobutdoyouknowwhatwi l
lmakemel oveyoumor e?
Him:Hmmm?
Me:I fyougogetmef ood.
Ilookedathi m, hiseyeswer eclosed.
Me:Qhawe.
Hel ookedatmet hencl osedhi seyesagai n.
Him:2mi nut espl ease.
Me:ButIam hungr ynow, youki dswantf oodnow.
Him:ButbabeIam sot i
red, Ijustusedupal lmyener gyonyou.
Me:AndIusedupal lofmi ne, youknowt hatcan'tbegoodf orourbabi es.Ihavet or egainmy
strengt h.
Heshookhi msel foutoff rust rati
ont hengotoutofbed.Hewor eashor tandunl ockedt hedoor
thenwal kedout .Ismi l
edt omysel f,thatwasamazi ng!Imi ssedhi m.Hecamebackaf t
eraf ew
mi nut es.
Him:Ihopei ti swar m enough.
Isatupandt ookt hepl ate.Hepul l
edhi sshor t
sdownt hengoti nbed.
Me:Di dyoubr ingsomet hingt odr ink?
Him:Youdi dn' tt ellmet o.
Me:ButIwanti t, Iam t hirst y.
Him:Thenwhydi dn'tyout el lmet hatyouwanti t?Yousai dyouwant edf oodIbr oughtyouf ood
ngokuuf unai juice?
Me:Di dyoudr inki t?
Him:Whatdoesmedr i
nkingj uicehavet odowi thanything?Ididn'tdrinkit.
Me:Youl yingYandi saIcansmel litwhenyouopenyourmout h.
Him:Heh!Babear eyoubei ngser iousr i
ghtnow?Youwai tedformet ogetinbedsthandwaso
noIam notgoi ngthere.Youdi dn' ttel
lmet hatyouwantj uice.
Me:KodwaQhawehaveIeverser vedyouf oodwi t
houtj
ui ce?
Him:Youj ustpushi ngitnow, youpushi ngit.
Hegotoutofbed, worehisshor tandopenedt hedoor.
Him:Doyouwantanyt hi
ngel se?
Me:Andagl assofwat er.
Him:Okay.
Me:Andchocol ates,aslab.
Henodded.
Me:Kuphel a.
Hewentt ogetmewhatIaskedf orthenhegoti nbed.
Me:Thankyoubabe, doyoumi ndf eedingme?
Hechuckledandshookhi shead.
Him:Your eallypushingi t
.
Il
aughedanddr ankwat erfir
stt henst art
edeat i
ng.Hekissedmyhi pt henlookedatme.
Him:Iloveyou, Ir
eall
ydoandIwantyout ocomehome.
Me:OfcosIam comi nghome.
Iwasn'tgoingt ogivehi m achancet othi
nkaboutChantel l
eafterspendingthewholedaywi
th
her.Hesmi led.
Him:Thankyou.
Me:Pleasur e.

45
Phumza:
Iwokeupt oanempt ybed, Yandi sawasn' tnexttomebuthel eftanoteonhi spil
low.Itooki t
andr eadi t,"Lastni ghtwasamazi ng, Ican'twaittohaveyouagai ntonight.I'
l
lbet hi
nkingof
you."Ismi l
edl ikeaf ool andsquashedt hepapert hencalledhim.Het ookthecallimmedi ately.
Him:St handwasenhl i
ziyoyam.
Me:Youshoul dhavewokenmeup.
Him:Notwhenyoul ookedsopeacef ul,no.
Me:ButIwant edyout obet hef i
rstper sonIseewhenIopenedmyeyes.
Him:Butatl eastIwast hefir
stper sont hatcamet omi ndwhenyouwokeupandt hef i
rsttot al
k
to.
Me:Yeahyeah, youatwor kalready?
Him:YepIhadt obeonsi tefirstthi ngthismor ning.
Me:OkayandChant elle?
Him:Don' tthinkaboutherbecauseIam not ,
Iam t hi
nkingaboutyouandal lt
hethingsIwi l
ldo
toyout oni ght.
Igiggled.
Me:Ust outYaya.
Him:St outi smysecondname.
Ilaughedandshookmyhead.
Him:I '
llpickyouupaf terwor ksopackyourbags.
Me:I '
llbewai tingf oryou.
Him:Youbet t
er .
"Yandisaweneedyouoverher e", af emalevoicespokei nt hebackgr
ound.
Him:Comi ng, babeIhavet ogo.Il oveyou.
Me:Il oveyout oo.
Him:Mcwamcwa!
Igiggledanddr oppedt hecallt hengotoutofbed.Iwor eagownandsl eepersthenwentt ot he
bathroom, Ihadabat ht henwentbackt omyr oom.Il oti
onedmybodyt hengotdr essedina
l
ongski rtandvest , madet hebedt henwentt ot helounge.
Mom:Uyal alant ombi ,yourbr eakf astisi nthemi crowave.
Me:ThankyoumamaandohIam movi ngbacki nwi t
hmyhusbandt oday.
Her:Iwasst il
lgoi ngt oaskwhenyougoi ngbackt ohim.That '
sgreatnews.
Me:Yeah.Hi sbabymamai swor kingwi t
hhi m.
Yandi sa'mom:Si ncewhen?
Shewascomi ngf rom herr oom.
Me:Yest erday.
Yandi sa'smom:Thatgi r lhast hener vebutdon' tfocusonherbutonyourhusbandand
mar riage.Youwi l
lnevergowr ong.
Mom:Beonhi smi nd24/ 7butnotonhi scase, mendon' tli
kebei ngnagged.
Yandi sa'smom:Andt her eisonl yonewayt ost ayonyourhusband' smi ndandyouar eal ready
doingi t.
Mom:Don' tgi vehi m ar easont ol ookandt hinkabouther .
Yandi sa'smom:Exact lyr especthi m, tr
usthi m andf eedhi m.Notj ustfoodbutyourbodyas
wel l
, don'tf i
ghthi m, avoi dar guingwi thhi m allthet ime, bet heunder st
andingandhappywi fe
thel astt hinghewant si scomi nghomet oagr umpywi fewhoj ustcan'tshutup.
Inodded.
Mom:Uset hoset ipsandyourhusbandwontf i
ndar easont ocheatonyou.
Me:Thankyoumama, t
hebot hofyouIdon' tknowwhatIwoul ddowi t
houtyou.
Them:Youwoul dhavel ef tyourhusbandal ongt imeago.
Ilaughed.
Mom:Don' tthr eatent oleavehi m al lthet i
meyouf eelingheatbecauseonedayhewontbegyou,
youwi l
ljustt ellyout oleave.
Me:Hewoul dn'tdot hat ,hel ovesme.
Mom:Somet imesl ovei sj ustnotenough.
Me:OkaymamaIwontdot hatanymor ehenceIam movi ngbacki nwi thhim.
Mom:Iknowyou, youcanbest ubbor nlikeyourf at hersomet i
mesandmar ri
agedoesn' twor k
witht hat .
Me:OkaymaIhavet oeat .
Mymot hercoul dgoonal lday, Iwentt ogetmymoodandat e.AftereatingIwashedt hepl ateI
wasusi ngt henwentt osi tout si de.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Aftersi tei nspect i
onIwentbackt otheapar tmentt ochanget henheadedbackt otheof fi
cef or
ameet i
ngwi thmybossandt eam aboutt hecont ractwewer epitchingfor.Igotther
ej usti n
ti
mef oritsowegotonwi thi t
.Af terthemeet ingChant elleandIwentbackt oouroffi
ce, Ihave
neverseenhersoexci tedaboutsomet hing.
Her :Thi si sgoi ngt obeagr eatexper ience,Ialwayswant edtot r
avelandseenewpl aces.
Me:I fwegett hiscont ractIdon' twantyout ogowi t hme.
Her :Whatdoyoumeanyoudon' twantmet ogowi thyou?Howam Isupposedt olearnal lthese
thingsi fyouar egoi ngt ocutmeof fimpor t
antandbi gpr ojects?
Me:Whoi sgoi ngt olookaf teroursoni fyoual sogo?
Her :I'l
ltakehi mt ogr an'shouse.
Me:What everdude.
Her :Doyout hi nkthatIam goi ngt omakeamoveonyou?
Ichuckl ed.
Me:Youar eunpr edictabl eChant ell
esoIdon' tknow.
Her :Thenwhyar eyousowor ried?
Me:Thef actt hatIdon' tknowwhat '
sonyourmi ndwor riesme.
Shel aughed.
Her :Don' tyout hinkIhavehadenoughofyourbl ackass?
Ichuckl ed.
Me:That '
snotwhatyouusedt osaywhent hi
sbl ackasswasbet weenyourl egs.
Shel aughedandt hrewapaperatme.Il aughedandt hr ewi tbackather .
Me:Seeyouevenbl ushing.
Her :St opi t.
Me:Youusedt obegmenott ost op.
Her :OhmygoshYandi sayousodi r
ty.
Ilaughed.
Me:Youl ovedi rtybecauseyoudi rtyyour sel
f.(shelaughed)Butonaser i
ousnot eChaIam not
wor ri
ed, Iknowyouovert hisbl ackasd.
Her:Thenwhydon' tyouwantmet ogowi thyou?Whydon' tyouwantmet obear oundyou?
Me:Di dIsayIdon' twantyouar oundme?
Her:Noti nsomanywor ds.Doyouhonest l
ythinksomet hingisgoingtohappen?
Me:Iknowt hatnot hingi sgoi ngt ohappenr elax.
Her:GoodbecauseIal sowantt omoveonwi thmyl i
fe.
Me:Thenmoveon.
Her:Unl ikeyouIwasi nl ovewi thyousoi tsnotassi mpl east hat.
Ithrewt hef i
leIhadi nmyhandont hedesk.
Me:Iam goi ngf orl unch.
Her:CanIgowi thyou?
Me:Yourf ri
endi sinhi swor kspacesogot ohim uyekemna.
Shel aughed.
Her:Your i
dicul ous!
Me:Noyour idiculous.
Her:Wecan' tkeept hist ensi onbet weenus.
Me:Noti fyoukeept alkingabouthowmuchIhur tyou.
Her:Idi dn'tt alkaboutt hat ,youwer et hinkingabouti t.
Me:NoIwasn' t.
Her:Yesyouwer e.
Me:OkayIwas.
Her:Wast hatsohar dt oadmi t
?
Me:Ij ustsai dt hatt ost opt hisgameyouwant edt ost ar
t.IfIwasgoi ngoutmaybeIwoul dwant
yout ojoi nmebutIam goi ngsomewher eelse.
Her:Home?
Me:NoIam goi ngt ocheckonot herbusi nesses.
Her:Canyoubr ingmesomet hingonyourwayback?
Me:Whatdoyouwant ?
Her:Somet hingchocol at y.
Me:Asl ongasyounotgoi ngt osayi twasagi f
t.
Her:Ar ghpl ease.
Ilaughedandwal kedoutoft heof fi
ce.Iwentt ocheckondad' sbusinesses,hadat al
kwi ththe
guysaboutkeepi ngt hebusi nessescl ean.Theyhadt heircompl ai
ntsbutIhadt heirfi
nalsay, I
didn'twantanycopsonmyt ail.Aftert hoseshor tmeet i
ngsIwentbackt owor kstoppingatt he
garaget ogetChant ell
eaBaronecakeandchocol ate,Igotmysel fabottl
eofwat erandj uice
forher.Ipai dt hengotdr ovet owor k.
.
WhenIgott owor kIpar kedt hengotof f,Itookthet hingsIboughtandwentt omyof f
ice.I
foundChant el l
ebusybehi ndherl apt opandsomepaper wor k,Mandl
awassi tednextt oher
runninghi smout hasal ways.
Me:Gotyourf avor i
te.
Her:Thankyou, youar esuchadar l
ing.
Me:Youcanor derpi zzakewena.
Her:Nopr obl em.
Him:Okaywhat '
sgoi ngonher e?Di dImi sssomet hing?
Me:Wedeci dedt obeci vi l
isedt owar dseachot her.
Her:Sincewest uckt oget herf oral i
fet ime.
Him:Li fet ime?
Her:Weshar eachi l
dt oget her .
Him:OhyesIf or got.
Me:Unt i
l hei s21atl east .
Hel aughed.
Him:Iunder st andbuddy.
Isatdownonmychai rt hent ookt hephoneanddi al
ledt heTabl eMountaincafé'snumber .I
want edt obookat abl ef ormeandmywi fe, whenIst ar t
edt alkingtheybot hlookedatme.I
coul dt el
lChant ellewashear tbr okenbutshepr etendedt olikeshewasokaywhenIhad
droppedt hecal l
.Ihadnot imet oapol ogi zeket histimeIj ustgotonwi thsomewor k.Whent he
pizzaar ri
vedIt ookabr eakt oeat .
.
Afterwor kIdr ovehomef ormywi fe, ourpar entswer ehappyt hatwewer emovi ngint ogether
agai n.Thel astt hi ngt heywant edwasf orust osepar ate,Ididn'twantt hateither .Mywi fedoes
i
tf orme, shei smyl ight ,li
l f
reak, l
ife,shei sbasi call
ymyever ything.Whenwegott oour
apar tmentIwentt oputherbagsi nt hebedr oom t henwentbackt ot hel ounge.
Me:Gof reshenupwegoi ngout .
Her :Idon' twantt ogoout ,Iam t ir
ed.
Me:Noyouj ustl azy, comeonwhenwast helastt i
mewewentonadat e?
Her :Aboutt womont hsago.
Me:Exact lynowgogetr eady.
Her :Okayar ewegoi ngsomewher ef ancy?
Me:Justdr essf ancy.
Her :Wher ear ewegoi ng?
Me:You' l
lsee.
Shegotupexci tedandwentt ogetr eady, Iwentt ohaveashowert oot hengotr eadyf orour
date.Ideci dedonbl ackj eans, whi t
eshi rtandbl ackt iet henf ormalbl ackshoes.Whi l
eshe
deci dedonabl ackdr esswi thaver yl ongsl i
tont hesi deandbl ackpenci lheels, shelooked
cl
assyandbeaut iful whenshewasdonewi t
hhermakeupandever ythi ng.
Me:HowcomeIdon' tknowt hisdr ess?
Her :Becauseyoudon' t,Iboughti twi thOl wethu.
Me:I tstoor eveal i
ngey.
Her :Soshoul dIt akei tof f?
Me:Nobabeyoul ookbeaut ifulIwasj ustsayi ngi tstoor evealing.Icleavageyabant wanabam
i
ngaphandeandsoi smyt high.
Shel ookeddownather sel f.
Her :Youmaki ngmeuncomf or table.
Me:Hayisukaumhl el etsgo.
Her :NoIshoul dt akei toff .
Me:Umhl enj ebabeIwasj oki ng.
Her :Noyouwer en' t.
Me:Iwasbabesor ryst handwasam canwegonow?Iwasj ustsayi ngyout empt i
ngme.St op
beingsoi nsecur e.
Shet ookhersmal lbagandmyhand.
Her :Nextt i
medon' tsayanyt hi ng.
Me:Sor r
ybaby, ar eyousur eyou' l
lmanagei nt hoseshoes?
Theyl ookedl ikesandal s.Sheyankedherhandoutofmi ne.
Her :Ifyoudon' twantmet ogowi thyouj ustsaysoandst opdoi ngt hi s.
Il
aughedandt ookherhand.
Me:I tsjustt hatIdon' tgethowyouwal kint hosezi ntambokal okuezi .
Shehi tmyhandandopenedt hedoor .
Her :Younotagent lemananymor e.
Il
aughed.
Me:Sor r
yst handwayoucaughtmeof fguar dnawe.
Her :Of fguar dyant onina?
Me:Todayuyaphoxayuh.
Shegi ggledandbr ushedmyar m.
Her :Sor ry.
Whenwegott oourcarIopenedt hedoorf orherbef oreshecompl ai nedaboutmebei nglessof
agent leman, shegotonandcl osed.ThenIwentt omysi deandgoton.Ist artedt hecart hen
droveof f.
.
Whenwegott ot her estaur antIpar kedt henwegotof f
,Iwentt ohersi deandt ookherhand.
Her:Isn'tthisthef i
rstplaceyout ookmeaf t
erourweddi ng?
Me:Thepl acewher eyoucr iedbecauseyoucoul dn'tuseaf orkandkni fe.
Shesl appedmyar m andIl aughed.
Her:Youdon' tfor getne?
Me:HowcanIf or getwhent hatwast hemai nreasonIf elli
nl ovewi thyou?
Her:BecauseIcoul dn'tuseaf orkandkni fe?Ist i
llcan'tusei t.
Wel aughed.
Me:Nobutbecauseyouar esel fl
essandbeaut iful,notonl yout si
debuti nsi
det oo.
Her:Ohmyl ove.
Me:Iswearyout hef ir
stgi rlthatwast hatwor ri
edaboutr epresent i
ngmewel linpubl i
c.
Wegott ot heent ranceandIspoket othegent l
emanatt hedoor .
Him:Thi swaysi r.
Heshowedust oat ableont hebal cony, theviewf r
om her ewasr eal
lybeaut i
ful.Ipull
edouta
chairforher ,shesatdownandIsatdownt oo.
Her:Intl
ebabe.
Me:Butnotmor et hanyou, youbeaut if
ulPhumza.
Shesmi l
edandl ookeddownt henatme.
Her:Thankyou.
Me:Ibr oughtyouher etor emi ndyouoft hedaywef ir
stf el
linlove.
Her:Howdoyouknowt hatIf elli
nl ovewi t
hyouher e?
Me:Icoul dseei tint hewayyoul ookedatme.
Shesmi l
ed.
Her:That '
sbecauseyouwer esweet .
Me:Hehemeandsweet ?Shal lweor der?
Her:Iam hungr y.
Icall
edourwai terandor der edforthebot hofus, Phumzadi dn'tevenl ookatt hemenu.That '
s
mywi f
ef oryou.Ipour eduschampagnei nt hemeant ime.
Me:I t
sal coholf reest handwa.Toourl ove.
Her:Toourl ove.
Webabyki ssedt hent ooksi psfrom ourgl asses.Whenouror derar r
ivedweat e.Aftereat
ingwe
ordereddesser tthenIset t
ledt hebi ll
.Aftert hatItookherhandandwegotup, wet ookawal k
aroundnj et al
kingandl aughi ng.Wet ookaf ewsel fi
est henwewentbackhome.Whenwegot
homewej ustundr essedandgoti nbed, Icuddl edherandwef ellasleep.

46
Yandi sa:
Dayst ur nedi ntoweeksandweeksi ntomont hs,3mont hsl at
er.Thi ngsbet weenmeandmy
wifewer egoi ngr eal
lywel l,wewer enow5mont hspregnantandboyhadshegai nedwei ght.I
couldn' tevenwr apmyar msar oundherwai stanymor e,that '
showhugeshewasbutshewas
stil
lthemostbeaut i
fulwomanIhaveeverbeenwi t
h.Shewasannoyi ngt hough, real l
yannoyi ng.
Shedi dn' thaveapr oblem wi t
hcr ying, yesshecr i
edli
kenobody' sbusi nessandi fIaskedher
whyshewascr yingherr esponsewasal wayst hesame;" Idon'tknow" .Whocr iesf ornot hi
ng? !
Geez!Anywaywef oundabeaut if
ul bighomef orourbi gf ami l
y,wewer emovi ngi ntoday
(Fri
day) .Ihadt ohireani nteri
ordesi gner /decoratortohel pmywi f
edecor ateourhomebecause
shej ustbecamel azynj e,shewasal wayssl eepingandi fshewasn' tsleepi ngshewaseat i
ng.
From whatIhadseenear l
ierwhenIwentt ocheck, i
twasr eall
ylooki ngbeaut if
ul .Itwast hatol d
vintagel ookbutwi that wist,oursittingr oom wasgol danddar kbr own, t
hel ounger oom was
l
ightbr own, thekitchenwasbl ackandwhi te.Ourbedr oom wasl ightbr ownandwhi te.
..Phumza
want edi tlikethatkalokbutIl ovedi ttoo.Andt hebabi es' roomswer ejustwhi te( noti nusef or
now) ,west il
ldidn'tknowt hesexoft hebabi esandmywi f ewant edt odecor at
et hei rroomsf or
hersel f.Thehousewasamansi on,adoubl estorybecauseofmanybedr ooms( 9tobeexact ),
themast erbedr oom, t
hesext uplets' bedrooms( noti
nuse) ,Qhawe' sr oom i ncasehesl eeps
overandt heguestbedr oom (thebabi es'nurseryfornow) .Ast udy, 4bat hsandapl ayroom for
theki ds, 2gar ages.Iwaspl anningonget t
ingabi gcarf ormyf ami l
y.Abi gf ami l
yi sexpensi ve
yerrr!Ispentmi ll
ionsthatIdi dn'treal l
yhaveonj ustahome, ahome!Andt herewasst i
llalotto
do,al ott obuy.Ei sh!
Thingswer ealsogoi ngwellatwor k,
wegott hecont ractinSwazi l
andandwewer eleavingon
Mondayt ostar
tont heproj
ect.Idon'
tknowhowIam goi ngt ol eavemywi feonsuchadi ff
icul
t
ti
me, sheneedsmenowmor et haneverint hi
sst ageofpr egnancyandonl yIcouldunder stand
her.Shet hrewtantrumsandshehadwi ldcravings, cravingst hatmeantIhadt owakeupi nthe
middleoft henightandr oam aroundtowni fwewer eoutofst ockendl inijusttogetherwhat
shewant edatt hattime.Andshechangedhermi ndl i
keaconf usedweat her,shecanbet oo
muchsoIam wor ried.AnywayChant el
leandIwer ealsoont her ightspace, ourrelati
onship
wasbasedonwor kandonourchi ldonly.Whom Phumzaaccept edandl oveslikeherown,
gosht hatwomanhasagol denhear t
.Andt hat'
swhyIl ovehersomuch.AnywayChant ell
e
hasn'tmovedon, notbecauseshei shopi ngforsomet hingt ohappenbet weenmeandherbut
becauseshewant st ofocusonhersonandbui ldinghercar eerf i
rst.Iadmi reherforher
mat ur
ity.

Anywayaf terpacki ngourbagsIwentt oloadt hem i nourcardownst air

s,thenIwentupt oget
mywomanandl eavet hekeywi tht hel andl ord.Honest lyIwasgoi ngt omi ssourl i
ttlelovenest ,
wecr eatedmemor i
esint hispl acebutIwasl ooki ngf or wardt ostartinganewl ifeandcr eati
ng
newmemor i
esi nournewhome.
.
.
Phumza:
Whenwegott oournewhomehepar kedt henwegotof f,hecamet omysi deandt ookmyhand.
Him:Wel comet oournewhome, Ihopeyou' l
ll ovei t
.
Me:Il ovei tal ready.
Heki ssedmycheek. .Theout sideext eriordecor ationwaswashedr iverrocksoi twasr eally
l
ooki ngbeaut i
ful.
Him:Shal lwegoi n?I'
llcomebackt of etcht hebags.
Inoddedandwewenti n.Thesi tt
ingr oom wasexact l
yhowIwant edi t
,thatvintageandr oyalty
l
ook.
Me:I tsbeaut if
ul !Ilovei t
!
Him:Phew!
Ilaughedandwentt ocheckoutt hel ounge, Ilovedi tt oot hent hekitchen.WowIdef i
nitelysee
mysel fcooki ngmyhusbanddi nneri nher ewi tht hel itt
leonesr unningar oundt hehouseand
maki ngnoi se.Hehuggedmef rom behi ndandki ssedmyneck.
Him:Sodoyoul ikeit?
Me:I tsexact l
yhowIwant edi t.
Him:ThankGodbecauseal otofmoneywenti nt omaki ngthishouset hisbeaut if
ul.
Hehadt or enovat ethewhol ehousebecauseIdi dn'tl i
kehowi tlooked, itwasdul landbor ing.
AndImustsayhi smendi dar eallygoodj ob, i
twasr eallybeaut i
ful.Thest onest heyused, gosh!
Itlookedl iket hosehousesf rom t heUni tedst ates, i
twasbeaut if
ul.Ilovedever ythingabouti t,
it
wasmydr eam home.Per ksofmar ryingsomeonewhoi sgoodi nhi sjobandknowspeopl e.
Me:Thankyoust handwasam yourhar dwor kdoesn' tgounr ecognized, Iappreciateit.
Ikissedhi scheekt henr emovedhi shands.
Him:Wher ear eyougoi ng?
Me:Tocheckoutt hebedr oom.
Hef ollowedaf t ermet oourbedr oom, thef loorwasmadeoft imberwoodt il
esandi tmadet he
room br i
ghtandbeaut i
ful.Ohandourbed!Lor dhavemer cy!Thet hingswecandor ighther e,
gosh!
Me:Babet hisr oom l ooksl i
keaqueen' sbedr oom.
Him:That '
sbecauseyouar emyqueen.
Me:Real l
yQhawe, t
hankyouf orever ything.
Hehel dmyt ummyt henki ssedmynose.
Him:Thankyouf orbeingmi ne,Iwoul dn'tbet hemant hatIam t odayi fitweren'tforyou.Al lof
thiswoul dn' tbeher e,yourpr esencei nmyl if
ei nspi redal lofthis.
Me:Youj ustwantmet obl ushwena.
Him:Iam bei ngser iousst handwasam event houghyouar eal it
tl
eannoyi ngatt hemoment .
Me:Oho!
Hesmi led.
Hi m:Iam j oki ngl ove.Wannaseet hebabi es'room?
Me:Hayisukaut heIam annoyi ng.
Hi m:Iwasj oki ngnj ebabe.
Me:Youwer en'tj oki ng, Iknowyouwer en' t.
Hi m:OkayIwontar guewi thyoubutbel ievemewhenIsayIwasj oking.Let sgocheckoutt he
nur sery.
Hepul ledmebymyar m outofourbedr oom t ot henur ser y.Ihaveneverbeent oahospi tal
nur serybutIt hinkIhadani deaofhowi tlooksj ustbecauseofhowournur ser ylooked.Buti t
wasbeaut ifullydecor at ed, justt hewayIi magi nedi tbutIcoul dt ellt
hatmyhusbandhadahand
i
nt hisbecauseever ythi ngwasboyi sh.
Hi m:So?
Me:I mbi .
Hel aughed.
Hi m:Youmadt hisi scool f
ormysons.
Me:Whosai danyt hingaboutt hem bei ngsons?Thesear egi rl
sorhal fhal f.
Hi m:Idon' twantanyhal fhal f
,Iwantboyssot heycanbr eakhear ts.Andi fwear ehavi nggirl
s
thenwebet terdr awupacont ractr ightnowst atingt hatIwi llnotbehel dr esponsi bleforwhatI
wi l
l dot oboyswhowi l
ldar et ryt ogetneart hem.Idon' twantanyboysneart hem, Idon'twant
somedogt obr eakmypr incesses' hear tsandmakeherort hem cr y.
Ilaughedandbr ushedmyt ummyast heyst artedki cki ng, asi ftheycoul dheart heirfat
her .I
coul dn'timagi nehi m bei ngst ri
ctt hough.
Me:Theycanhearyou.
Hehel dmyt ummyandbr ushi t.
Hi m:Yougott hatr ighti fyouar egi rlsyouwi l
lber aisedj ustl i
kemommy, Iwi l
lbest ri
ctsoyou
bet terbenotgi rls.Ir eal lyhopet heyar enotgi rl
sbecauseIdon' twantt oseet hem cr ybecause
somef ool sbr oket hei rhear ts.
Irol l
edmyeyesandr emovedhi shands.
Me:Nosonofmi newi ll beahear tbr eaker .
Hi m:Nosonofmi nei sgoi ngt obesof t.
Me:Theyar enotgoi ngt obesof tbutt heyar enotgoi ngt obebr eakinghear tsei ther.
Hi m:Thenwhowi lltakeaf t
ermei ftheyar egoingt ot akeaf teryou?
Ichuckl edandwal kedoutoft henur sery, Iwentt otheki tchenandl ookedi nt hecupboar ds.
Gr eatwewer ef ullyst ocked, Itookoutapacketofchi ps.
Hi m:Aybabeyougoi ngt obef at .
Me:Iam al readyf atkeshamei ncaseyouhaven' tnot iced.
Iwentt osi tinf rontoft het vandhef ollowedaf terme.Heswi tchedi tonandchannelhopped.
Me:CanIgetaf ootr ubpl ease?
Hi m:Cani tbet imeal ready?
Me:You' llhavet omassagemybodyever ydaywhent heyar ebor nandyouwi llhavet ochange
theirnappi es, bat ht hem andhel pmei nf eedingt hem.Di dIment ionsl eepl essni ghts?
Hi m:Okayt heycanst ayi nt her e,I'
llrubyourf eet .
Hecamet osi tnextt omeandt ookmyf eet,hepl acedacushi onundert hem t henmassaged
them.
Me:Thankyou.
Hesmi led.
Hi m:Anyt hingf ormyqueen. ..
.Babe
Me:Myl ove?
Hi m:I '
ml eavi ngf orSwazi landonMonday.
Me:HowcanIf or gett hatyouwi llbel eavi ngmei nthi scondi t
ion?
Hi m:Hehbabemypocketneedst or ecoversot hatIcanbuyusaf ami lycarbef oretheyar e
bor n.West i
llhavet hei rr oomst odecor atesoweneedt hismoney.
Me:AndIneedyou.
Hi m:Iknowmyl ovebutyourmot herwi llbeher et ohel pyou.Andnott of or gett heweekl yspa
treat ment s,youwi l
lbeget t
ingyourf eetandbodymassagedever yweekandt heyar ebet ter
thanmei ngi vingmassages.Youwontevenmi ssme.
Me:Real lyYaya?Youhavesomet hingt heyal ldon' thave.
Hel aughed.
Him:Aybabeyoursexdr iveissohi ghandwi ld,Iam evenf ai
lingt okeepupwi thyou.
Ismi l
edshyl y, Idon' tknowwhatwaswr ongwi thmebutt herewer edayswher eIjustcr aved
sex.Li kegoodsex.Andhehadt osat isfymeevenwhenhewasn' ti nthemoodf ori t
.
Him:Let sbeser iousr i
ghtnowmyl ove, wi llyoubeokay?
Me:DoIhaveachoi ce?
Him:Don' tbel iket hatst handwasam pl ease.Iam al readyf eelinggui ltyabouti t.
Me:Iam j oking, yeahIam okaywi thi t.
Him:Ar eyousur e?
Me:Nobecauseyou' l
lbeawayYandi sa!Youwon' tbeher ewhenIneedyouandIr eall
yneed
your ightnow.
Him:Butbabeyouknowt hatItriedt ogetoutoft hispr oj ectbutt heywon' tal lowmet omi ssit
.
Me:What everYandi sa.
Him:I 'l
lmakesur et hatLubanzii sal waysavai lablei nfacthewi l
lmovei nwi t
hyouguyssoi f
youneedt obesomewher ehecant akeyou.Iwi llal sobeavai lableonmyphonei ncasesof
emer gency, I
'l
lf l
yi ni fIhavet obabe.
Me:Sur e?Becauset hel astt i
meyoupr omi sedt of lyi nwheneverIneedyouormi ssyouyou
endedupt akingt hewhol emont hi nPr etoria.
Him:Youhol dinggr udges?
Me:No!ButIwasj ustsayi ngYandi sa. ..
Him:BabeIhaver easont ocomebackIwantt obebyyoursi dewhenyoubr i
ngourchi ldrento
earth.
Me:Pr omi sethatyouwi llcomeback?
Him:Ipr omi semyl ove, Iwi l
lbej ustacal laway.
Me:Okay.
Him:Justokay?
Me:Whatdoyouwantmet osay?
Him:Not hing, itsnotf unl eavingyoul iket hi s.
Me:I '
llbef ine, mom andLubanziwi lltakecar eofme.
Him:Buti fyouneedmemyl ovedon' thesi t
atet ocal l.
Me:Okay.
Him:Gr eatletmegogetourbags.
Inodded.Hecar eful l
yr emovedmyf eett henwentt ogetourbags, afterbringingi nourl astbag
weunpackedourcl othesandpackedhi sbagf orMonday.Honest l
yIdi dn'twanthi mt ol eave,
I
want edhi m bymysi debutweal soneededmoneyt ol ookaf terourbabi es' needs.Af terallof
thatwewentt odi pourf eeti ntheswi mmi ngpooli nt hebackyar d.Iwasf eelinghotand
i
rrit
ated, mybodywasi tchysohewentt ot akeat issueoi landl otionedmywhol ebody.Yandi sa
was/ islazybutr ightnowhewassuper manwi thsupernat uralpower s.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Wheni twasget tingl ateIgotupandhel pedherupt henwewenti nside,Ihadt opr epareus
tonight '
smeal .Idi dn' twanthert ocookanymor ebecauseIwasscar edthatshewoul dbur nor
hurther self.
Her:Iam goi ngf orabat h.
Me:Takeashowermyl oveandcal lmei fyouneedanyt hing.
Her:Youspoi l
ingme.
Me:I fdadwasal ivehewoul dtel
lmet o.
Her:Youmi sshi mr ight?
Me:Al ot,hewoul dhavesomet hingf unnyt osayi fhewast oseeyour i
ghtnow.Buthey. ..
Imissedmyol dmanever yday, l
ifewasn' tt hesamewi thouthi m.
Her:Bef or eyoust artt earingupl etmegohavet hatshower .
Ismi l
ed, sheknewmet oowel l.
Me:I '
llmakeyousomet hi ngt oeatint hemeant i
me.
Her:DoyouknowwhatIwoul dli
ket ohave?Pi zzawi thl otsofcheeseandmeat ,notchicken
though.
Me:I t snotheal thy.
Her :Wel lthat '
swhatIwantsoyoubet t
ergogeti t
, t
ripledeckerbabe.Ohandsomest eak,it
shoul dbej uicyne?Tel l
them nott oputoni onont hepi zzane?
Isighedoutl oudl yandl ookedather .
Me:Wi l
lt hatbeal l
?
Her :Andl otsofj uicebabene?Appl ef l
avour ed.
Me:I t sint hef ri
dgenj ebabe.
Her :Idon' twantt hatonenj ebabe, Iwantaf reshonef r
om t hest ore.
Me:Ij ustboughtt hattoday.
Her :ButIdon' twanti t.
Me:Okay, willt hatbeal l?
Shenodded.
Me:OkayI '
l
lbebacki nahouror30mi nutes.
ShenoddedsoIpeckedherl i
pst hent ookmykeysandwal letthenwal kedoutt othecar .Igot
onandwentt ogethert het hingsshewant ed.Af t
ert hatIdr ovebackhome.
.
Igothomeandf oundheront hecouchwat chingt vandst uf fi
ngherf acewi thpeanut sand
raisins.
Me:I 'm back.
Her :Iwasst ar tingt ot hi
nkyouwer en' tcomi ngback.
Me:Wher ewoul dIhavegone?
Her :Swazi l
and, seemsl ikeyoucan' twai tt ogoaway.
Idishedupf ort hebot hofust henser vedher ,Ireallywasn' tint hemoodt oar guewi thher .Aft
er
thatIj oinedherandweat einf r
ontoft het v.Af tereat i
ngIdi dt hedi shest henwentt osi tdown
i
nt hesi ttingr oom, Itookt her emot eandchangedchannel s.Wewat chedt vtil
llate.
.
Thef ollowi ngdayIdeci dedt otreather ,Itookhert o5Mount ainsl odgeandSpa.Wewer egoing
tospendSat ur dayandSundayni ghtt here, shewasmadatmef orsomer easonsoIwant edt o
maket hingsr ightbet weenusbef orel eavingf orSwazi l
and.Idi dn'twantt oleaveonabadnot e
becauseIwasn' tgoi ngt obeokayt hroughoutt hepr oj
ect.Idi dn'twantt of i
ghtwi t
hmywi fe.
Anywaywhenwegott ot helodgewewentt oourr oom t of reshenupt henwewentdownst ai
rs
tot heSpa, mi ndyoushewasst illnott al
kingt ome.
Me:Babewhenar eyoupl anningt odr opt his?
Her :...
.
Me:Whatdoyouwantmet odokebabengobawebot hknowt hatIneedt hi
smoney?
Shebr ushedhert ummyandl ookedaway.
Me:Awumbike.
Shesmi ledandpushedmepl ayf ully.
Her :Butnotl ikeyou.
Me:Real ly?Youl ookl i
keawhal e.
Shel aughed.
Her :Butyoul ovet hiswhal ekeshame.
Itookherhandandki ssedi t
.
Me:Umuncusaniuhl ekaxaut hukwa.( youst upidshame, youonl yl aughwhenImockyou)
Shesmi ledandki ssedmyhand.
Her :Iloveyou.
Me:Il oveyout oobabe.
Ipeckedherl ipst henspoket othemasseuseaboutourappoi ntment .Whosaysmassagesar e
notf ormen?Wewentt ochangei ntoourgownst hengotourbodi esmassaged, af t
erthe
massageswewentf orlunch.Af tereat i
ngIset t
ledt hebillthenwewentbackt oourr oom and
didwhatwedi dbestwhenwewer et ogether ,thel ovebumpwasn' tgoi ngt ogeti nourway.She
wasaf reakt hough!
.
.
Phumza:
Mondayf i
nal lycame, Iwokeupwi thanachi nghear t.IfonlyIcoul drewindt heweekend.Idi dn'
t
wantmymant ogo, Iwasgoi ngt omi sshi m butt henagai nweneededt hemoneyandhel oved
whathewasdoi ng.Hewasaspassi onat eabouti tashewaspassi onat eaboutourmar ri
age,
meandourbabi es.Anywayaf tershower ingIwor eashor tpeacht unic/mat ernit
ydr essand
mor ningshoes.It i
edupmybr eadsandsatont hebed.Hel ookedatmet hencamet ostand
betweenmyl egsandcuppedmyf ace.
Him:Don' tbesadpl ease.
Me:Iam notsad, Iam j ustt ired.
Him:Ti redhuh?
Inodded.Heki ssedmyf or eheadt henl ips.
Him:I 'llmi ssyou.
Me:Met oo.
Him:Okayl '
llfinishpacki ngt henwecangone?
Me:Wantmet ohel pyou?
Him:Ihavei tal lundercont r olmyl ovedon' twor ry.
Me:Hayiokay.
IgotupwhenIhear daknockont hedoorandat tendedt oi t
.Itwasr oom ser vicesoIt ookmy
chocol at epuddi ngandwentt osi tdown, Yandi sat ippedt heguyt henhel eft.
Him:Ur udebabesomet imes.
Me:Iam noti nt hemoodQhawesopl ease.
Him:Youandyourhor mones, ay!
Ismi ledandat ewhatIhavebeencr avingt hewhol emor ning.Af t
ereat i
ngwewentt obook
oursel vesoutoft hel odget henhedr oveusbackhomepi ckingupmom f rom ont hewayhome.
.
Whenwegothomehepar kedt henwegotof f.Mom near lyf ai
ntedwhenshesawourhouse.
Me:Wel comet oourhomemama.
Her:Ar eyousur ethi sisyourhouse?
Yandi saandIl aughed.
Him:Ewemamai tsourhouse, ourhome.
Her:Ayi sent l
eangat hi zezi ezi vel aet i
vini.
Wel aughed.
Me:Comei nsidemama.
Ipulledherbyherar m.
Her:Thi si slikeadr eam baby.
Me:Adr eam comet ruemama, comi ngf rom t hevi ll
ageIdi dn'tknowt hatonedayIwoul dlivein
suchabi gandbeaut if
ulhouse.
Her:AndIdi dn'tt hinkt hatonedayyouwoul dbel ooki ngt hisbi gandbeaut iful.
Me:Hayisukamama!
Her:Yohyohyoh!Babywhatar eyougoi ngtodowi t
hsuchabi gtv?
Me:That 'smyhusband' sst ationmamaIknownot hingabouti t.
Her:Yuhbabyt hi sisbeaut iful, yourhusbandi sreal l
yl ookingaf teryou.
Me:Hei smamaeybutIal sowantsomet hi
ngt omyname.
Her:Andyouwi llhavesomet hingt oyournamebutaf teryour ai
set heseki ds.
Shebr ushedmyt ummy.
Her:Thi si sreal lybeaut if
ul .
Me:Al lthankst ohi m.
Him:That 'sbecauseyouwer enaggi ngme.
Me:Uyabonakemama?
Shel aughed.
Her:Hei sjustj oki ngwi thyou.
Him:Shet akesever ythingser ioust hesedaysandazii fitst hehor monesorwhat .
Her:Itst hehor monesbabyot her wiseshei sn'tliket hat .
Him:Iknowmama.Shoul dIof feryouanyt hi
ng?
Her:Hayispendsomet imewi thyourwi feIcanj ust ,yuht hishousei sbeaut iful.
Him:Thankyoumama.Theki tcheni sovert her eandyourr oom, youcansl eepi noneoft he
babies' rooms.Justchooset heoneyoul ove, LubanziandMandl awi l
lbeher ewi ththebeds.
Her:Thankyouson.
Him:Nopr obl em mama, babecanIseeyoui nourr oom?
Me:Sur e.
Ifoll
owedaf terhi mt oourr oom.
Him:WhenMandl aar r
ivesI '
llbel eavingwi thhi m, Ihaveaf ewt hingst odointheof fi
ceand
thenI '
l
ldr ivet oSwazi l
and.
Me:Wi t
hhi m?
Hescr at chedhi shead.
Him:AndChant elle.
Me:Ohwowi nyourcar ?
Henodded.
Him:ButMandl awi llbedr ivinghi scar .
Me:Whycan' tChant elledr i
vewi t
hMandl a?Whydoesshehavet obei nyourcar?
Him:Mandl ai sgi vingsomeoneel seal i
ft.
Me:Whycan' tyougi vet hatsomeoneal i
ft?Andi thiyouwi llstartwor kinginSwaziland?
Henodded.
Me:Thant hat '
swhenyou' llseeort al
kt oher .
Him:Butbabeyouhavenot hingt owor ryabout .
Me:Iam notwor riedbutIam j ustsayi ngChant ellei sgetti
ngal it
tlecomf ort
ablehere.
Him:Okayt oavoi danymor ear gument sIwi lltaket heladyi nMandl a'
scarandChant ell
ewi
llgo
toMandl a'scar .
Me:Ar eyouonl ywor kingwi thl adiesna?
Hel aughed.
Him:Youar eonej eal oushotmamashame.
Me:Hayit shi niwhyar eyouonl ydr i
vingwi thl adies?
Him:Because, Idon' tknow.Theydon' twantt odr ivel ongdi stances.
Me:I ftheydon' twantt odr i
vel etthem f lyorwhat ever,noonei stakingmyseat .
Him:Yohayokaynkosi kazi wam endi mt handayo.
Het ookmyhandsandki ssedt hem t henhel dmy" waist"
Me:Iam bei ngser iousQhawe.
Him:Okayst handwasam noonei sridinginyourman' scar .
Me:ForyoursakeIr eal lyhopeso.
Him:Ipr omi sebabeI 'l
ldr i
veal one.
Me:Okay.
Him:Nowgi vedaddysomel ove.
Weshar edashor tki sst henhewentdownonhi skneesandki ssedmyt ummy.
Him:Zi thandwazam pl easet r
eatmommywel landwai tfordaddybecausehewant stobethe
fi
rstper sont owel comeyout othewor ldplease.
Me:Sayyeswewi lldaddy, wewi ll.
Heki ssedmyt ummymul t
ipletimes.
Him:Daddyl ovesyou.
Me:Theyl oveyout oo.
Hel ookedupatmeandsmi led.
Him:AndIl oveyoumor ebutdon' ttellthem.
Igiggled.
Me:Theydi dn' thearyouandIl oveyout oo.
Hegotupandki ssedmyl i
ps.
Me:Yuhhayiwet huYandi sawaskewat handaukuncami sa.
Hel aughed.
Him:Icannotnotki ssmywi f
ewhenIam goi ngtobeawayf r
om herf oramont horso.
Me:Ne?
Him:Yep.
Heki ssedmyl ipsagai n.
Him:Il oveyouwoman.
Me:Il oveyouman.
Hehuggedmet i
ghtt henki ssedmyf oreheadandunwr appedhi sar msf rom ar
oundme.
Him:Letmechecki fIhaveever yt hing.
Me:Letmedoi tf oryou.
Mymancoul dn' tpackabag, heneededsomeonet otellhim whatt ot akeandwhatt ol eave.He
noddedsoIst artedf rom scr atchandpackedhi sbagsandt oil
etr
ies.Byt het i
meIf i
ni shedhe
waswi t
hhi sf riendsf i
xingt heot hert wor oomsf ormom andLuba, mydar li
ngs.SoIzi ppedthe
bagsandl eftt hem ont hebed.Iwentt ocheckont hem.
.
Me:Mol weni
Them:Heyf irstladykaYandi sa.
Ismi led.
Me:Youguysgood?
Them:Yepandwedoneher e.
Me:Thanks, Mandl apl easel ookaf termyman.
Mandl a:Hei si nsaf ehands.
Me:Thankyou.
Yandi saki ssedt hesi deofmyhead.
Yandi :Youshoul dst opst r essingaboutme, Iam agr ownassman.
Me:Yeahyeah.
Mandl a:Lovebi rdsweshoul dgetgoi ngboet .West i
llhavet ogot ot heof fice.
Yandi :Lubal ookaf terher ,takecar eofherf orme.I fsomet hingiswr ongorhappeni ngwi ththe
pregnancypl easei nf orm me.
Luba:Iwi llboetdon' twor ry.
Yandi :IknowIcancountonyou.
Luba:Shei sinsaf ehands.
Yandi :Okaymyl oveIhavet ogo, you'llwal kmeout ?
Inoddedandwewentt oourr oom, het ookhi sbagsandwentt oloadt hem i nhiscar .Hecame
backi nt osaybyet omom andme, Iwasal readywetwi t
ht ears.
Him:Babedon' tcr ypl easeI 'l
lbebackbef oreyouknowi t.
Inodded, heki ssedmyf orehead, noset henl i
ps.
Him:Takecar eofyour sel f.
Me:Yout oo.
Him:Ndi yakut handa.
Me:Thandanam.
Weshar edaki sst henhegoti nhi scar .Lubal ookedatmet henatYandi saashi m andMandl a
droveout .Yandi sahoot edt hent heydr oveaway.
Luba:Hewi l
lbebackbef or eyouknowi t
.
Me:Mci m!
Iwenti nsideandt oourr oom.Iundr essedandgotundert hebedcoverandcr i
edmysel fto
sleep.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Leavingmywi fei nsuchast ater eallyhur t,Ihonest l
ywi shIcoul ddoever ythi
ngf r
om home.I
didn'twantust obesepar atedf orsol ong3mont hswast oomuch.Anywaywehadashor t
meet ingatwor ksowest ar t
edt her ebesi dest hat
'swher ewewer edepar tingfrom.Af terthe
meet ingChant ellecamet omewi thherbag.
Me:Canyoudr i
vewi thMandl apl ease.
Her :Youar esoscar edofher .
Me:Iam notscar ed.Thel astt hingIwantt odoi sbet raymywi f
e.
Her :Okaywhat ever .Soshoul dIgetNoxol of oryou?
Me:Iam dr ivingsol o.
"Wifeyi sgi vinghi m st ricti nstruct ionst of ollow" ,
Mandl asai d.
Me:Sowhat ?Ican' tbest uckwi thmyexoranyot herfemal ef ormor et han20hour s.
Hel aughed.
Her :Shei sj ustcont rolli
ngyou, Idi dn'tknowyout obet het ypet ogetcont roll
ed.
Him:Hej ustl ovesandr espect shi swi fesogoputyourbagsi nmycar ,youdr i
vingwi thme.
Her:That'
snotr espectbuthei sscared,sheisn'tevenar ound.
Him:Chant elleyoudon' twantt ocryandsayhei srudewhenyoubusypushi nghisbut t
ons.
Youshoul dknowbynowt hatwhatthespeci all
adywant ssheget s,i
tsjustthewayi ti
s.He
respectsher .
Her:What ever!
Shet ookMandl a'
skeysandwal kedout .
Me:Thanksbud.
Him:Anyt i
mebud, saf
et r
ip.
Me:Yout oobud.
Weshoul derbumpedt henwentoutt oourcar s,Igotont hecarandputonDjKhal i
d'salbum.I
roll
edmybl untsandputt hem ont hesideoft hedoort hendr oveout.Istart
edatt hegaraget o
getcoffeeandsomet hingst okeepmeawakeont her oad.Igotdriedfruit
s,bil
tong,sweet sand
water.Ipaidt henwentoutt omycar ,Igotonandcal ledPhumzabef oregoi ngont heroad.She
tookthecal laftersomet i
meandwespokenj e,shewasst i
llcryi
ng.Womenandt ears!#best
fri
ends.Anywayaf t
erdroppi ngthecarIdr oveoutandt helongjourneybegan.

47
Yandisa:
Wegott oSwazi landear l
yWednesdaymor ni ngandcheckedi ntoHappyVal l
eyresor tand
Casino, webookedf oraccommodat iononl inesot heywer eexpect ingus.Ourr oomswer e
oppositeeachot her ,t
hewhol eteam nj e.WhenIgott omyr oom Ical ledhomet ofindouthow
theywer edoi ngandal sot ol etthem knowt hatIar r
ivedsaf ely.Aftertalkingt othem It hrew
myselfont hebedandf ellasl eepi mmedi at ely.
.
IwokeupwhenIhear daknockont hedoor ,Igotupandwentt ogett hedoor .Mandl awal kedin
l
ookingf r
esh, meont heot herhandei shbr aIwasexhaust ed.Bei ngbehi ndthewheelf orso
manyhour swi thnoonet ot akeoverwhenIwast i
redreal l
yhur tme, i
twast oomuch.
Him:Don' ttellmeyoust il
lsleepi ng!
Me:Eybr a
Rubbingmyeyes.
Him:Meandt hegi rlsar egoi ngt ohavel unchwi l
lyoujoi nus?
Me:Ist il
lhavet of r
eshenup.
Him:Theyst illget t
ingr eadyt oosoyouhaveabout20mi nutes.
Me:Okay.
Him:Af terlunchwear egoi ngf oranout ing, someadvent uref unsowearsomet hing
appropr i
ate.
Wor kdidn'tst artunt il
Mondaysot hatmeantwehadt of ami l
iarizeour selveswitht hepl acein
themeant i
me.
Me:Ar en'tyouguyst i
red?
Him:Wear ebutwewantt oseet hepl ace.
Me:Al ri
ghtwhat ever.
Iwentt ohaveaqui ckshower .Af tershower i
ngIlotionedandgotdr essedi nshorts, vestand
Jordansneaker s.
Me:Iam done.
Him:Theywer ealreadycal l
ing.
Me:Let sgo.
Wewal kedoutofmyr oom andl ocked, thegi rl
swer ealreadywai t
ingf orusout sidemyr oom so
Igreeted.Idi dn'tgr eett hem whenwegother ethismor ning,Iwasn' tint hemoodf oranyone.
Them:Hey.
Noxolopul ledMandl a'sar m andt heywal kedaheadofus, l
eavi ngmeandChant ellebehi nd.She
keptofl ookingatmeasi fshewant edt osaysomet hi
ngbutwasscar edt obecauseoft hewayI
waswi thher .SoIt ookoutmyphoneandwentonwhat sapp, justtalkingt omysi st ers.
Her:Youl ookexhaust ed.
Me:Iam.
Her:Youshoul dn'thavet urnedmyof ferdown.
Sheof feredt odr ivesoIcoul dr elaxbutIt ur neditdownbecauseIdi dn'twantheri nmycar .
Me:Wel lIdi d, what '
sgoi ngt ochangenow?
Shej ustuppedherpaceandl eftmebehi nd.Ievent ual lycaughtupwi t
ht hem butt heywer e
alreadyseat edar oundt het abl ei nt her est aur antandl ooki ngatmenus.Ipul l
edoutachai rand
satdown.
Me:Whatar eweeat i
ngt oday?
Chant ell
e: Checkt hemenu.
Me:I '
mt iredsoor derf ormewhat everyouhavi ng.
Her :Me?
Me:Not heonebehi ndyou, ofcosyou.
Shechuckl edandcal ledovert hewai tress.Sheaskedf ort wosal adssoIcancel ledwhatshe
order edf ormeandbr owsedt hr ought hemenuasMandl aandNoxol oplacedt heirorder s.I
placedanor dert oot henl ookedatt hem, theywer et aki ngsel f
ies.ThewayMandl aj ustbl ended
i
nwi tht hel adi esonecoul dswearhei sgay, hewasevenst ar ti
ngt ol ookl i
keal ady.Idon' t
knowwhatOlOlseesi nhi m.Thewai tr essbr oughtourdr inks, Mandl aandIor der edbeer swhi l
e
thel adiesor der edwi ne.
Me:Thatbet terbet hel astgl assofal coholyouwi l
lhave, Idon' twantadr unkar df orababy
mama.
Her :Iam notyourwi fesoyoubet ternott el lmewhatt odo.
Me:Iwoul dn' tmi stakeyouf orher ,your ude.
Her :Thenf uckof f!
Mandl a:Canyout wogetal ongf orasecond, atl eastpr etendl ikeyouwer epr etendi ngbackat
home.
Us:What ever .
Ouror der sf inal lyar rivedsowedugi n.Af t ereat i
ngweor der edanot herroundofdr inkst hen
settledt hebi l
lj ointly.Wegotupandl ef tt
her estaur antaf t ert hat.Wewentt othepar kingl ot
andgotonourcar sthendr ovet ot hegamer esor tforsomef un.Whenwegott heret heyf orced
met opai rupwi thChant el l
ei nal ltheadvent ur ousact ivitieswepa- tookin.I twasl i
kewewer e
i
nat her apysessi on, weshout edateachot herever ysecondwegotandChant ell
ewasr eally
l
oud.Iwasr eal l
ygr atef ulwhenal loft heact iviti
esended, Icoul dgobackt omyr oom andsl eep
mos.
Noxol o:Let st akepi ctur es!
Me:Iam nott aki ngpi ct ur es.
Chant ell
e: Youmoodyandgr umpyl ikeyout heonepr egnant .
Ichuckl edandj oi nedt hem, Itookaf ewpi ct ur eswi tht hem t hent ookpi cturesoft hem.
Chant ell
e: That 'smor el ikei t, l
iveal ittleman.
Mandl a:Wear ei nSwazi landf orGod' ssakeandt her ei ssomucht odoher e.
Me:Kal okmnaIam t i
r ed.
Mandl a:Wemeet i
ngt het eam f ordr inksl at eratt hebar .
Me:OkayI '
llbet her ebutf ornowIam goi ngt obed.
Ileftt hem t her eandwentt omycart hendr ovebackt ot hel odge.WhenIgott hereIpar kedt hen
gotof fandwentt omyr oom.Igotont hebedandf ellasl eep.
.
Likeear li
eraknockont hedoorwokemeup.Igotupandwentt ogett hedoor .Mandl awal ked
i
nwi thChant elle.
Me:Yougoi ngf ordr i
nksal ready?
Them:Yepgetr eady.
Me:HayimanguysIdon' twantt ogof ordr i
nks.
Him:Wel lwear egoi ngf ordr inksbef or ethatl ongmeet ingt omor row.
Her :Sogetr eady.
Me:Whatar eyoudoi ngi nmyr oom?
Her :I'l
lwai tout side.
Me:Idi dn' tsaywai tout si deIj ustaskedwhatyouar edoi ngher e.
Shef oldedherar msi nf r ontofherchest ,Ichuckl edandwentt ohaveashowert hengotr eady
togoout .Wef irstwentf ordi nnert henwewentt ot hebar .Mandl aor deredar oundofshot sfor
war m upsandwedownedt hem, onebecamet wot hent hreeandf our.Ever yonewasgame, I
wor kedwi thf unl over sandwehadr easont ocel ebr ate.Af tert heshot sweor deredbeer sand
satdown, wepassedar oundt alksandconver sat i
ons.Somegotupt odance, lookedl i
ke
ever yonewashavi ngf un, incl
udeme.Anywaywheni twasget ti
ngl ateIdeci dedt ocal li
tquit
s
wehadanear l
ymor ni ngandast heleaderIhadt obeonpoi nt.Igotup.
Me:Goodni ghtgent sandyoubet tergetsomesl eept oo.
Brian:Youbet tersaveherbef or ei tstool ate.
Me:Savewho?
Him:Her !
Hepoi nt edt oChant elle, shewasent ertainingsomemanshej ustmetandt heguywasr eal
ly
sizingherbody.Theywer ekissingandt ouchi ngal lt hewr ongpl aces.
Me:Shei shavi ngf un.
Brian:Shei soutofi tbr u.
Me:Tel lMandl atogogether .
Hepoi nt edt oMandl a, hewasbei ngcar riedoutoft hebarbyt woguysf rom ourt eam.
Me:Whatdi dt heyhaveal one?
Brian:Theywer edr inki ngl i
kef i
shes.
Me:Wel ltheyar eadul ts, theyknowwhatt heyar edoi ng.
Theyf inallyst oppedki ssi ngandgotupf r om wher et heywer e.Chant ell
el ookedcompl et
elyout
ofi t
, shecoul dn'tevenst andst raightandt heguywassoberenought ot akeadvant age.
Brian:Idoubt .
Me:Idon' tcar esheknowswhatshei sdoi ng.
Brian:Yousur e?Becausei fsomet hinghappenst ohert oni ghtthen...
Me:Whatdoyouwantmet odo?Rui nherni ght ?
"I'
llseeyoui nt hemor ningboys" ,Ilookedather .AsmuchasIdi dn'tcar eandwant edt oteach
heral essonIgotr eal lypi ssedwhent heguygr abbedherassi nf r
ontofme, thatwast he
mot herofmychi ld.Igr abbedherar m andpul ledhert ome.
Me:Shei swi t
hmebr o.
Heaskedherj ustt obesur eandshenodded.Heputhi shandsupandwal kedoutal one.She
restedherheadonmychestandki ssedmyneck.
Her :Let sgot oyourr oom.
Ichuckl edandst eppedawayf rom her .
Me:Ar eyoui nyourr ightsenses?
Her :Yousohandsome.
Me:Youdr unkandyougoi ngt obed.
Ilift
edherup, Briangavemehershoesandbagt henIcar r
iedheroutoft hebar .
Her :Doyouwantt oknowsomet hing?
Me:Hmmm?
Her :Ineverst oppedl ovi ngyou.
Me:Youdr unk.
Her :ButImeani t,IloveyouYandi sa.
Me:Wher ei syourkey?
Her :Idon' tknow.
Iputherdownwhenwegott oherr oom andIl ookedf orherkeyi nherbag.
Me:Foundi t.
Iunl ockedandcar riedheri n.It uckedheri nbed.
Her :Iknowyoust illlovemet oo.
Me:Goodni ghtChant el le.
Her :Yandi sa.
Igotupandwal kedt owar dsthedoorbutt urnedt ol ookatherwhenIhear dhert hrowup, she
threwupr ightnextt oheront hebed.Si es!It ookoutawat erbot tl
ef rom t hef r i
dgeandwai ted
forhert of inisht hrowi ngupt hensatherup.Igavehert heopenedbot tle, sher insedhermout h
thendr ankt hewat er .
Me:Whatdi dyoudr inkCha?
Shej ustst ar edatmebl ankl ythencl osedhereyes.Icoul dn'tl
ethersl eepi nher e,itstunksoI
gotheroutofbedandcar ri
edheroutofherr oom t hent omi ne.Ituckedheri nt obedt hensat
ont opoft hebedcoverandst rokeherhai rtil
lshef ellasl eep.Icar efullyr emovedherheadt hen
gotupandwentt osi tont hecouch, Iputmyf eetupont hecof feet ablet henf oldedmyar msi n
frontofmychestandcl osedmyeyes.
.
IguessIf ellasl eepi nt hatposi ti
onbecausendet hukewhensomeoneshookme.Ir ubbedmy
eyesandl ookedather ,shewasl ookingbet t
ert hanl astni ght.Iputmyf eetdownt hengotup
andst r
et ched, mybodyhur tyoh!
Her :Thisi snotmyr oom r i
ght?
Me:Canyouwai tf ormet of i
nishdoi ngt his?
Her :Iam sor ry.
Ifinishedst ret chi ngmysel fandl ookedather .
Me:Whatdi dyoudr i
nkl astni ght ?
Her :Idon' tknowbutIguessIdr ankal ot.
Me:Soyoucan' tr ememberwhatyoudi dlastni ght?
Sheshookherheadandwentt opourwat eri
nt oagl ass.
Me:Youshoul dgot oyourr oom andseewhatyoudi d,maybet hatwi ll
remi ndyouofl astni ght.
Shedr ankt hewhol eglasst henputi tdown.
Her :Thanks.
Me:Andf orgetaboutt hemeet ingwehadt ogot ot oget her ,I'
l
lgoal one.
Her :Iam sor ryandt hanks.
Me:Getsomer est .
Shenoddedandwal kedout .Isi ghedandundr essedt henwentt ot akeashoweraf t
erput t
ing
myphonei nt hechar ger.
.
.
Phumza:
Iwokeupmi ssi ngYandi sasoIdeci dedt ocal lhim.Whenhedi dn'ttakemycal lIimmedi ately
i
magi nedt hewor st ,maybehewaswi t
hChant elle.OhmyGod!Whatam Igoi ngt odoi fhei s
reallywi thher ?Igotoutofbedandwentt odr inkwat eri nt heki t
chen.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Igotoutoft heshowerandwentbackt omyr oom wi t hat owelwr appedar oundmywai st
.It ook
myphoneoutoft hechar ger ,Icoul dswearIhear ditr i
ngi ng.Ihad3mi ssedcal l
sfrom Phumi
soIcal l
edherback, shet ookt hecal limmedi atelyandkeptqui et.
Me:Sor ryImi ssedyourcal l
sIwasi ntheshower .
Her :Wher ear eyougoi ng?
Me:Toameet i
ngwi ththecl i
ent sandt heirmen.
Her :OhIj ustmi ssedyou.
Me:Imi ssyout oost handwasam.Howar eyou?
Her :Iam okay.
Me:Andt hebabi es?
Her :Kicki ngandal ive.
Me:That '
sgr eat , don' tfor getthatyouhaveadoct or '
sappoi ntmentt omor r
ow.
Her :Ihaven' tf or got tenmyl ove.
Me:Tel lmeal labouti t
.
Her :Iwi ll
.
Wespokeal ittlel ongert hensai dourgoodbyes.Igotr eadyf ormymeet i
ngt henleftforit.

48
Yandisa:
Igotbackfrom themeet ingtof i
ndeveryonearoundtheswi mmingpool,
theladiesinbi
kinis
andtheguyswer et
opl ess.Whydoesever yonethi
nkthatthi
sisaholi
day?Wenotonhol iday,
weher etowork.Thesoonert heygetthi
shol i
dayideaoutofthei
rheadsthebet t
er,
Iam
att
endingmeetingsandt heysi ppingcocktai
lsandwhiskeyhaibo!Mandlaj
oggedt ome.
Mandla:Howdi ditgo?
Me:Theyshowedmet hesi t
eandever ythi
ng,thei
rmenar ereadytost
artbui
ldingsoMonday
weget t
ingonwi t
hit.
Mandl a:Sof ornowwecanr elax?
Me:Noyoucan' tr elax, weher etowor k.Iwantyouguyst ober eadyf orMonday.
Him:Youst artingt osoundl i
keourboss.
Me:Iam yourbosswhenhei sn'ther e.
Him:Awucomeonwhenwast hel astt imewehadsomef un?Joi nus.
Me:No.
Him:Whendi dyoubecomet hi
sbor i
ngandst uckupguy?You' llgrowgr eyhai rbeforeyourage.
Andboyyouhavet odoal ltheset hi ngsnowbecausei nf ourmont hsyou'llbeaf at
herandyou
wontbeabl et odoal loft heset hings.
Me:Your ightI '
llgochange.
Him:That 'smor el ikei t.Shoul dIor deranyt hingf oryou?
Me:NoI 'lldeci deonwhatt ohavewhenIcomeback.
HenoddedsoIwentt omyr oom, Ichangedi ntoashor tandNi kepushi nst henwentout sideto
j
oinmyt eam.Ior der edagl assofwhi skeyt hensatont hechai randl aidback.Thesunwas
hectic,i
twasn' thot .I twasbur ning, nowondert heydeci dedt oswi m.Mandl acamet ositnextto
meandof feredmeasmoke.
Me:Shont wana.( Itookapuf f)Sowhathappenedt oyoul astni ght?
Him:Ihadonet oomany, Iwasj ustsoexci tedaboutbei ngher eandt hi
spr oject i
ng.
Me:Noi nxakiyenuni yaphaphawi thyourf ri
end.Di dshet ellyouaboutl astni ght?
Him:Whathappened?
Hel ookedatme.
Me:Not hing, shewasj ustoutofi t
.
Itookasi pofmydr ink.
Me:Nextt imei fyoudeci det odr ink, dri
nkr esponsi bly.Iam nother etobabysi tChant el
le.And
nextt i
meIwi lllethergowi t
hst r
anger sandIpr ayt oGodt hatt heyhur ther.
Hel ookedatmei nshock.
Me:Sot hatshewi lllear nt hehar dway.
Him:Ar eyoubei ngser i
ous?
Me:Yesbecauseshei sst upi d,shei ssodamnst upi d.
Him:Whyar eyousopi ssedof f?Whathappenedl astni ght ?
Me:Askher !Shei sf il
thyandst upi d.It oldhernott odr i
nkbutshej ustwentonanddi dit.Next
ti
meIwontbet her et osaveherokay?Youcant ellhert hat.
Him:Hayi !
Hecl appedonceandt ookmydr ink, hedr ankital latonce.
Him:Thi si sgood, itsr eallygood.
Il
ookedathi ml ikeWTF? !
Him:I '
llgetyouanot herone.
Me:Sundi qhel amanwena.
Him:Youal wayst aki ngmydr i
nksandInevercompl ain.
Ishookmyheadandhegotupandwal kedaway.Chant ellegotoutoft hewat erandcamet osit
ontheseatt hatMandl awassi t
tingon, Chantellewassexyt hough.Li kemor et hanPhumza
sexy.
Her:Thankyouf orwhatyoudi dlastni ght.
Me:Iwast elli
ngMandl at hati fyoueveroryoucont inuet oacti rresponsiblyIwi l
lletyougo
withwhoeveryouhookupwi thandIpr aythatthatper sonhur t
syou.AndIwontbet her
et o
saveyout hist i
me.
Her:Iam sor ry.
Me:That 'swhatyousai dyear sagowhenIhadsomeone' sbl oodonmyhandsbecauseofyou.
Her:Youwer epar tlyt obl ame, youpushedmet hatf ar.
Me:Wow!YouknowCha. ..
Her:ButIam sor ry.Iam sor rythatyouhadt odowhatyoudi df orme, toprotectme.Iknowt hat
i
twasn' teasyf oryouandIam sor ry.
Me:Whydi dyoudr inkl iket hatt hist ime?
Her:Iwant edt ohavef un.
Me:Whati fIdi dn'tst opyouf rom l eavi ngwi thhi m?Whati fher apedyouhuh?
Her:Idon' tknowYandi sa.
Me:Whenwef indyouonadi tchsomewher emol est edandmur der edpl easer epeatt hosesame
wor dsokay?BecauseIwi llnotcar et hist ime, Iwont .Andf orsomeonewhowentt hrought hat
terr
ibleexper i
enceyour eal lydon' tlear n.( shel ookedaway)Doyouwantt ogot hrought hat
experienceagai n?
Her:Don' tshoutatmeokay!Youdon' tknowhar ditwasf orme.
Me:ExcusemeIknowhowhar di twas, Iwast her ewi thyouever yst epoft heway.Chant ell
e..
.
Shewi pedhereyes.
Me:Youcancr yChant elle, cryokay?Idon' tcar ebecauseyoual sodon' tcar e.Leavet hecl ub
withguysyoudon' tknowagai nandIpr omi seyoui twi llhappenagai n.
Her:Your eallyhear tl
ess.
Me:Iam nothear tlessChant elle!Icar eaboutyousomucht hatIwantyout ol earnt hehar dway.
ThistimeIwontbet her et ohol dyourhand, youwi llgot hroughi tallalone.
Her:Doyour eal l
ywantmet ogot hr ought hatagai n?
Me:No!Idon' twi sht hatuponanyone, Chant el leIj ustwantyout oactr esponsi bl
y.Iwantyout o
stopput t
ingyourl ifei ndangerj ustt ospi teme.Don' tent ertainmenyoudon' tknowwhenyou
drunk, afterwhatwewentt hroughIr eal lythoughtyoul ear ntsomet hing.
Ihadr easont ocar eandbemadather , wewentt hr oughsomucht oget her.SomuchandIdi d
l
oveher ,Iwoul ddoanyt hingt omakehersmi le.Ievenki lledamanwhomol est edheratsome
partywewentt owhenwewer est il
l young( duet othesamemannersheconduct edher selfin
l
astni ght )inthenameofpr otect ion.It ookherhandsandpul l
edhert omychai rthenwi pedher
tears.
Me:St opcr yi
ngokay?
Shewr appedherar msar oundmywai standr est edherheadonmychest .
Her:Iam sor ryandIwontdoi tagai n, Ipr omi se.
Me:Iknowyouwont , Iwontal lowyout o.
Irubbedhershoul der .Shesatupst rai ghtbr eaki ngherembr ace, shewi pedherf acet hen
l
ookedatme.
Her:Whendi dyoudot hist attoo?
Me:Af terwegotmar ried.
Her:Shemeanst hewor l
dt oyour i
ght ?
Me:Why?
Her:Becauseshei sal soonyourbody.
Me:Youal soonmybodysoyoual someant hewor ldtome.
Her:Butyoudon' thaveapi ctur eofmeandyoucan' treallyseemynameher ebecausei tsso
smal l
.Andi tscr owdedbyal ltheset hings.
Shepokedmyshoul derandIl aughed.
Me:Butyoucanseei tr ight ?
Her:Buti tsnotvi siblet oot herpeopl e.
Me:Becausei t
snotmeantf orot herpeopl ebutl etsnott alkaboutt hat.Idi dn'tmeant oupset
you.
Her:Ishoul dactr esponsi bly.
Me:YeahIam sor ry.
"Herewego" ,wet urnedandl ookedatMandl a.
Him:Thi sisf oryouandt hi sisf orme.I fyout oldmet hatyouwer echi lli
ngwi thherIwoul d
havebr oughtheradr inkt oo.
Her:Itsf i
ne, Iwasj ustl eavi ng.
Shegotupandwentt ot akeat owel .Shewr appedi tar oundherbodyt henwor ehersandal sand
wenti nside.Iwi pedmyeyesanddownedmydr i
nk.Mandl ajustgotupandl eftmeal one, l
ast
nightandt histal kjustbr oughtbackmemor iest hatwebur iedal ongt i
meago.Theywer en'tso
greatbutwewer et her ef oreachot her , Idon' tknowhowweevengother e?Ial wayst houghtI
woul dendupwi thher .IknowIhur therbutIwasyoung, ignor antandnai vebackt hen.ButI
l
ovedhersomuch, Idi d.Idon' tknow.Igotupf rom t heseatandwentt omyr oom, It hrew
mysel font hebedandt ookmyphone.Iwentt hrought hepi ctureswet ookyest erday, Noxol o
sentthem t oourwor kgr oupyest er dayj ustbr aggi ngaboutourevent fulandf unf il
ledday.I
foundmysel fthinkingaboutal lthet hingswedi dt oget her ,thememor i
esweshar edand
l
aughi ngt omysel f,thosewer ef unt i
mes.Idi alledPhumza' snumberandcal ledher ,shet ook
thecallal mosti mmedi at ely.Ij ustwant edtohearhervoi ce.
.
Her:Heyyou.
Me:Imi ssyou.
Her:Imi ssyout oo.
..
..
.
Her:Ar eyouokay?
Me:YeahIam goodwhy?
Her:Youwer equi et.
Me:NoIam f i
ne, Iam j ustt ired.Ijustgotbackf rom themeet ing.
Her:Howdi di tgo?
Me:Wel lIam r eal lyexci tedaboutst ar tingt hisproject.
Her:AndIam exci tedf oryou.
Wecont inuedt al kingnj e, Ineededsomet hi
ngt ogetmymi ndof fChant el
leandmywi fewasi t
.
.
Iwokeupduet oar umbl ingst omach, Ical l
edr oom ser vi
cet henwentt otakeashowersol ong.
WhenIgotoutoft heshowerIhear daknockont hedoorsoIwentt ogetit,i
twasmydi nner.I
ti
ppedt heguyandt hankedhi mt hent ookmydi nner.Iclosedt hedoort hensatdownt oeat.
Iphangabel i
tsho!Af tereat ingIl otionedandwor emyboxer sonl y.AsIgoti nbedal oudknock
camet hrought hedoor ,Igotoutofbedandwentt ogett hedoor .
Me:Mandl a.
Him:Yougoi ngt obedal r eady?
Me:Yeaht her ei snot hi ngt odoar oundher e.
Him:Wegoi ngt ot hecasi no.
Me:Wi thwho?
Him:JustyouandI .
Me:Youwantust ogambl enow?
Hel aughedandpushedme.
Him:Getdr essed, wenotgoi ngt ogambl e.Wej ustgoi ngtochecki tout.
Me:I fyouhavebeent ooneyouhavebeent oallofthem, theyar eallthesame.
Him:Wegoi ngf ordr inks.
Me:I nthecasi no?
Him:I nt hecasi no, theyhaveabaryouknow.
Me:Iknowt hat .
Him:Thenwhatar eyoust i
llwai ti
ngf or ?Getdr essed.
Itookoutbl uej eansandt -shi rtt
henputt hem on.Iwor esneaker sthenwewal kedout,we
walkedt otheCasi no.Wewentst raightt othebarar eaandor deredtheirbestscotchandci gars,
i
twasMandl a'si dea.
Him:Ar eyoucool ?
Me:Why?
Him:Ear li
eryouwer en' tokay.
Me:ButnowIam andIdon' twantt ot alkabouti t.
Him:Chant elleisn' tt alki ngt ome, shewontevenopenherdoor .
Me:That 'sherbusi ness, maybesheneedsspace.
Him:Whatwer eyout wot alki ngabout ?
Me:Not hingndodaj ustl eti tgo.
Him:Sur e.Sohowi swi feydoi ngwi thoutyoubyhersi de?
Me:Shei sdoi ngwel lact ual ly,Ispoket oherear li
erandshei swel l
.
Him:That 'sgr eat .
Me:Yeah.Sot ellmear eyouser iousaboutOl wethu?
Him:Il oveyoursi st er.
Me:Butar eyoui nlovewi thher ?BecauseIdon' twantt oseeherhur t.
Him:Sur eIam.Shemakesmehappy, Iloveher .
Me:SoyouandNoxol o?
Him:Whatabouther ?
Me:Youseem cl ose.
Him:Ar ghyouknowhowgi r
lsar ewi t
hme.Bayazi thandel a!
Ilaughed.
Me:I '
lladmi tther eissomet hingaboutyout hatjustdr awst hem t oyou.
Him:BecauseIam chi lled.
Me:Not herei ssomet hingyounott el
lingme.
Him:Li kewhat ?
Me:Ar eyousur et hatyouar estraight ?
Hel aughed.
Him:Yousi ck!Idon' tchaseass!
Me:Iwasj ustmaki ngsur e.
Him:Yout hinkIf i
ndyousexy?Bul l
shi t!Younotsexy.
Ilaughed.
Me:Youst upidkewena, Idon' tknowhowyougotyourdegr ee.
Him:Onaser iousnot ebudIam notgay, Ijustlovet hel adiesandt heyl ovemet oo.I fyouwer e
torel axandbel aidbackt hel adieswi llbeal loveryouagai n.
Me:Ihaveast opnonsensesot heywont .
Ishowedhi m myhand.
Him:Andt heyl ovet hemar riedones.
Wel aughedandj ustcont inuedt alking.Wej usthadachi l
lsni ght ,t
al ki
ngaboutnot hingr eall
y.
Mandl awascr azy, hecoul dn' tbeser ioussoi twehadcr azyt al ks.
.
Afterachi l
ledni ghtwi thmyboywewentbackt oourr oomsbutIst artedi nChant elle'sroom
j
ustt ocheckonher ,Iwant edt omakesur ethatshewasf i
ne.Iknockedacoupl eoft i
mesand
therewasnor esponse.
"Chaopent hedoor ,i
tsme.Yandi sa"
"Canyougoaway"
"Goodyoust i
llalive",sheopenedt hedoor .
Her :Whywoul dn'tIbeal ive?Youdon' thonest l
yt hinkIam sui ci daldoyou?
Me:NoIt hinkyoust rong, youhavebeent hroughwor se.
Her :Gr eatsowhyar eyouher e?
Me:Ij ustwant edt omakesur ethatyouf i
ne.
Her :Mandl a?( Inodded)Ij ustneededspace.
Me:It oldhi m.
Her :Sodon' twor ryaboutme, got obed.
Me:Al rightgoodni ght .
Her :Goodni ght .
Shecl osedt hedoor ,ohwel l
.Iwentt omyr oom, Iundr essedandgoti nbed.
.
Iwokeupqui tel atethef ollowi ngday, Icoul dn'
tsleepl astni ght .Ijustkeptont ossingand
turning, Isl eptt hewhol eofyest er daykal ok.Igotoutofbedandwentf orashowert henwent
forbr eakf ast ,af t
ereat ingIset tl
edt hebi l
lt henjoinedt het eam wewer egoi ngsightseei ng.
.
.
Phumza:
TodayIhadadoct or'sappoi ntmentsoaf tergetti
ngdr essedIwentt ot hel ounge, mom gaveme
apl ateoff ood.
Me:Thankyou.
Her :Anyt i
me.
Isatdownandat e.Af tereat ingIwentt or insemymout ht heLubanziandIl ef
tfort hedoct or.
.
Ever ythingwasokaywi tht hebabi es,t heywer egr owingandIwaspoppi ngi ntwomont hs
becauset heycoul dn'tst ayi nanyl ongert hant hatorIwasgoi ngt ol oset hem onebyone.
Anywayaf tert hedoct or'sappoi nt mentIcal l
edYandi sat olethi m knowt hatever ythingwas
okay, het ookt hecal laf tersomet i
me.Ther ewer epeopl et alkingi nt hebackgr oundandsome
wher escr eami ng, wasn' thet heref orwor kna?
Him:Myl ove.
Me:HeyIj ustsawt hedoct orandever ythingisgoi ngwel l.Theyshoul dber eadyt ojoi
nusi n
thewor ldbyJul y.
Him:Thatear l
y?
Me:Yepsoweshoul dst ar tshoppi ngf ort hem.
Him:Okayst handwaI 'llcomebackatt heendoft hemont hsowecandot heirshoppi ng.
Me:Ar eyousur e?Idon' twantt odi sturbyouf r
om yourwor k.
Him:Notatal lmyl oveI '
llbet hereIpr omi se.Ican' tletyoushopal one.
Me:Okayt hen.
Him:Howar eyouf eelingt hough?Youokay?
Me:YeahIam good, it
sj ustt hatIam t ired.
Him:Icani magine.
Me:Ij ustwanti ttobeJul yal ready.
Him:Can' ttheywai tt i
llAugustatl eastbecauseIwantt obet herewi t
hyou?
Ilaughed.
Me:Nopet heycan' t.
Him:Whatar eyoudoi ngnow?
Me:Lubanzii stakingmet ot hemal l,Iwantt obuyaf ewt hingsthenI 'l
lgohome.
Him:Getsomer estmyl ove.
Me:Iwi llwhenIgethome.
Him:Okayt henIl oveyou.
Me:Il oveyout oo.
Him:Canyougi veLubat hephone?
Igavei ttohi m andt heyspokef orabout3mi nut est henhegavei ttome.
Me:Bye.
Him:Loveyou!
Ismi l
edanddr oppedt hecal lthenl ookedatLuba.Iwant edt oknowwhatYandi sasai dbecause
Iwaspr ettysuret heywer et alkingaboutme.
Him:Hej ustt ol
dmenott ol etyoubuyunheal thyf oodsespeci al
lyicecream.
Me:Butt hat'sthemai nr easonwegoi ngt ot hemal l
.
Him:Wel lyourhusbanddoesn' twantyout obuyi t.
Me:Hei sn'ther esohewontknow.
Him:Itsnotheal t
hyf orsomeonei nyourcondi tion.
Me:Hai boLubanzi whatdoyouknowaboutpeopl ei nmycondi t
ion?I '
l
lgeticecr eam qha
qhaba.
Ilaughed.Whenwegott ot hemal lhepar kedt henwegotof fandwal kedint othemal l.Iwent
strai
ghtt oMi l
kylanef ori cecr eam thenwewentt opi cknpayf orsomechocol atyst uf
f.
.
.
Yandisa:
Afterouradvent urousact iviti
eswesatdownandhadl unch.Ienj oyedt heseact i
viti
esbecause
therewer emanyofusandmyt eam isf ul
lofcr azypeopl esowehadf un,event ookpictures.
ForonceIwassur r
oundedbyChant elleandIdi dn'tevenf eelli
keshewasar oundbutInot i
ced
thatshewasbackt ohernor malandhypersel f.Ther eisasayi ngt hatgoesl i
ket hi
s;"youcan't
keepagoodmandown"wel lyoucan' tkeepChant elledownnomat t
erwhat.

49
Yandisa:
Dayswentby, wespentt hem f amil
iar
izi
ngour selveswi ththesiteandwhatwehadt odo.The
holi
daywasf i
nallyoverandMondaywasher e,thepr ojecthadtost arttodaysoaf t
ergett
ing
dressedIwentt omeetever yoneforabr eakfastmeet ing.Ijustbri
efedt hem onwhatIexpect ed
fr
om t hem,thi
swasn' tmypr oj
ectalone.Ourt eam wasmadeupofEl ectri
calengi
neers,
archit
ect(Mandla)andal lsor t
sofpeoplet hatwer einvolvedinmaki ngabui ldi
ngstandbesides
contractor
s.Thecl ientshiredt hei
rownment odot hebui l
dinganddi gging.Aft
erthemeeting
weset tl
edthebillthenwentonsi t
eandwor kbegan, Iwassoexci ted.Inf actever
yonewas
excit
ed.
.
Throughoutt heweekwewer ebusywi thwor k,weal wayswentbackt oourr oomst iredsot her
e
wasnot imet opl ay.Noonehadt imef oranot her, wewer ehandsonwi t
ht hepr oject.
.
Dayswentbyr eal l
yf astandbef or eIknewi titwast heendofMay.IwokeupFr idaymor ning
andpr epar edt ogot osi tethenIl eft.WhenIgott her eIwentt ocheckont hepr ogr essoft he
projectandmat er i
al s, Itest edt hei rqual it
yt henaskedChant el
letoputi naor derbecausewe
weregoi ngt orunoutofbui ldi ngmat erial.Af t
erdoi ngal loft hatIwentt ot heof fi
ceonsi teand
satdown, Mandl awal kedi nwi t hf oodandcof f
ee.
Him:Yougood?
Me:Exhaust ed, Ijustcan' twai tf ort hisdayt oend.
Him:What '
st hespeci al occasi on?
Me:1, weget ti
ngpai dand2, Iam goi nghomet omywi f
e.
Him:Andwear et urni ngupt oni ghtsoyoucan' tgohome.
Me:EyndodanaIonl yhavet heweekendof fsoIcan' t.Ihavet obet her
et onight .
Him:Al ri
ghtyou' llf l
y?
Me:Yeaht hisdr ivi ngi sj ustnoton.I '
mf l
yingf rom Dur bant houghsoyou' lldrivemet here.
Him:When?
Me:I nanhour ,Ican' tst ayher eanyl onger .Imi ssmywi f
e.
Him:Shamet henl etsgonow.
Me:Yousur eyoucanhandl ei t?
Him:Of cosIcan.
Me:Gr eatt hen.
Igotupandt ookmyst ufft henwewal kedoutt omycar .Hegavehi scarkeyst oChant ell
et hen
wedr oveoutofsi teandt oDur ban.
.
Whenwegott oDur bani nter nat ionalai rpor tandpar ked.
Me:CanIl eavemybabyi nyourhands?
Him:Sur eyouknowyoucant rustmewi t
hher .
Me:Youwontl etanyonedr iveherr ight ?
Him:Of cosnot .Youcant rustme, I'l
ldr i
vehert hough.
Me:Al onenowomeni nher e.
Hechuckl ed.
Him:Don' twor ryshewi l
ldr ivemycar .
Me:Thanksl etmego, myf lighti sl eavingi n30mi nut es.
Him:Seeyouwhenyoucomeback.
Me:Shar p!Thankyoubr o.
Him:Savet r
ip.
Me:Sho, dr i
vesaf ely.
HenoddedsoIgotof fandwal kedi ntotheai r
port.Iwentt oboar dmyf l
ight.
.
Igott oCapet owni nt heear lyhour soft hemor ningandt ookat axihome.Thedr i
verdr opped
meof fout sidet hegat e, Ipai dhi sf eet hengotof fandwal kedi n.Iknockedont hedoorsi nceI
didn'thavet hekey, Ionl yhadaccesst othegat e.Af teraf ewmi nutessomeoneunl ockedand
opened.
Me:Lubanzi .
Him:Whendi dyougether e?
Me:Now, Iflewi n.
Him:Butwhydi dn' tyout ell met of etchyouf r
om t heai rport?
Me:It houghtyouwer esl eepi ng.
Him:Iwas.
Me:Thengobackt obed, I'
lllock.
HenoddedsoIl ockedt hedoort henwentt omyr oom.Iundr essedt hengoti nnextt omywi fe,
cuddl i
ngherf rom behi ndIki ssedhershoul der.
Her:Yaya?
Me:Gobackt osl eep.
Shet ur nedt of acemydi r ectionandweshar edaki ss.Webr okei taftersomet imeandshe
smi led.
Me:Mor ni ngbeaut i
ful .
Her :Mor ninghandsome.
Me:Howar eyou?
Her :Idon' tknow, Iam f eel i
ngf at.
Ismi ledandki ssedhernose.
Me:Butyoust illbeaut i
ful .
Her :Youj ustsayi ngt hat .
Me:Iswear .
Her :Imi ssedyou.
Me:Imi ssedyoumor e.
Her :Iam gl adyouhome.
Me:Met oo.
Ipeckedherl ips, shecl osedhereyessl owl y.Iguessshewasf all
ingbackt osleep, Icar efull
y
car essedherbumpt henf ellasleept oo.
.
.
Phumza:
Iwaswokenupbycr ampsr i
ghtbel lowmyt ummy, Isatupandbr ushedmyt ummy.They
star tedasmi norcr ampsbutgotmassi vebyami nute,IslappedYandi saawake.
Him:Whatt hef uck? !
IswearIdi dn'tmeant osl aphi mt hathar d, Ijustwant edhi mt owakeup.Hequi cklysatup
whenhesawt ear si nmyeyes.
Him:What 'swr ong?
Me:I thur ts!
Him:Wher e?
Igotoutofbedhol dingmyt ummy.
Me:OhmyGod! !
Hej umpedoutofbedandhel dmeupbutIsl appedhi shandsof fandst ompedmyf eet .
Him:Wehavet ogetyout ohospi tal.
Me:Getmom!
Her anoutoft her oom.Ihel dthebackofmywai standbended, Inot i
cedr edli
ningr unni ng
downmyl eg.
"Yandi sa! ",Iscr eamed.Hi m andmom r ani ntother oom.
Mom:Wehavet ogethert othehospi talt hisisn'tgood.( shewr appedat owelar oundmywai st
)
Tryt or elaxbaby, br eathebaby.
Me:I thur tsmama!
Her :Canyouwal k?
Ishookmyheadandwi pedmyeyes.Yandi saj ustputhi shandsonhi sheadandt ear swent
downhi scheeks.
Her :I fthebot hofyouar egoi ngtocr ythenIdon' tknow.
"Thecari sr eady! ",Ihear dLubashout .
Her :Hel pme!Yandi sa!
Luba:You' llhavet ocar ryher .
Hewi pedhi sfaceandwor epant st henscoopedmei ntohisar ms, li
ft
ingmeup.
"Youar egoi ngt obeokaybabe" ,hecar riedmeoutoft heroom t henout sideandi ntot hecar .He
goti nwi thmeandLubadr oveust ot hehospi t
al.Inthecart hepai nj ustescal ated,If eltlikeI
wasgoi ngcr azybecauseoft hepai nIf el t.Yandisakeptont el
li
ngmet or elaxandbr eat he,I
coul dn' tr elaxnorbr eat he.Iwasi nser i
ouspai nher e!
.
.
Yandi sa:
Whenwegott ohospi tal shewast akenawayandwewer et oldtowai toutsidether oom.Ihel d
myheadandl ett het ear sout ,t
hedayIf ear edandwi shedt hatwoul dn'tcomewasf inallyher e.
Allsor tsoft hought saboutwhatt hedoct orsaidcoul dhappenont hisdaycamef lashi ngi nmy
mi ndIcoul dn'tlosemywi fe, notPhumi .Icoul dbearl osingt hekidsbutnother .Lubanzipul l
ed
met oachai r.
Me:Ican' tl oseher .
Him:Younotgoi ngt ol oseher ,youneedt obest rong.
Anur sewal kedoutoft her oom shewasi n, IpushedLubanziandwentt othenur se.
Me:Howi sshe?Howi smywi fe?
Her :Thedoct orsar eat tendi ngt oherbutt heyneedt oknowhowt hepai nstar
ted.Howf ari
s
she?
Me:Shewasst ar t
ingher6t hmont ht odayandshej ustwokeupcr yi
ngoutofpai n.
Her :Shewasn' tdoi nganyheavychor es?
Me:Nobecauseherdoct ort oldhert ot akei teasy.
Her :Why?
Me:Shehashi ghbl oodpr essur e.
Her :Wassheunderanyst ress?Taki nghermedi cation?
IlookedatLubanzi andwebot hnodded.
Him:Shewasal wayshappybesi dest hosef ewdaysshewokeupmoody.
Me:Whi chi snor mal forapr egnantwomanr ight
?
Shenodded.
Her :Wasshekeepi ngf it?Eat i
ngheal thy?
Lubanzil ookedatme.
Me:Shehadcr avings.
Shenodded.
Her :Wewi lldoever yt hingwecanf orthebot hoft hem.
Me:I ts7oft hem, Ican' tloset hem.Wher eisdoct orNhlapho?
"Righther e, Iwaswi t
hapat i
entsor ryf ortakingtimet oattendtothiscall.Whereisshe?"
Nur se:Comewi thme.
Me:Savemywi feandt hebabi es.
Shenoddedandt heywal kedi nt ot her oom Phumi was.Lubanzilookedatme.
Him:Whatdoyoumean7?
Me:Wehavi nghal fadozen.
Him:6?
Me:Yeah.
Him:Shi t!Damn!
"Uphi !Wher ei sshe? !",Ilookedatt her ecept ion.
Me:Mom.
Theyr ant ousandhuggedme.
Mom:Howi sshe?
Me:Herdoct orjustwentt oseeher erightnow.
Phumi 'smom:Bat hiwhat 'swr ong?
Me:Theyhaven' tsai danyt hing.
Phumi 'smom:OhPhumza.
Mom:Shei sgoi ngt obeokay.
Wehear dt hedoorcl osesowet ur nedt olook.I twasDrNhl apho.
DrN:CanIt alktoyou?
Me:Theyf ami l
ysoyoucant alk.
Shenodded.
DrN:Wecan' tst opt hebl eedi ngandherbl oodpr essureishigh,l
ookslikewewi llhaveto
oper atei mmedi atelyt oavoi dl osi nganyoft hem.Yourwi fe,shesaidonlyyoucangi veusthe
goahead.
Mom:Youcan' t,theynotr eady.
DrN:Ma' am t oavoi danycompl icat i
onswehavet odoi tnoworwemi ghtloseallofthem.
Inodded.
Me:Ican' tl oset hem sodoi t.
DrN:You' llhavet ocomewi thme.
Mom:Yandi sa.
Iturnedt oherandcuppedherf ace.
Me:Mom not hingwi llhappent ot hem.
Icouldunder standwhymom wasscar ed.Iwasbor npr emat ur elymysel fandmyt winwas
sti
ll
bor n, Ispent2mont hsi nhospi tal.
Phumi '
smom:Wewi l
lpr ayt hatshedel iverssaf ely.
Me:Thankyou.
Lubanzigavemehi ssandal sandIf ollowedaf t
erDrNhl aphot owher ePhumzawas.
.
Shel ookedatmewi tht earsi nhereyes.
Her:Iguesst heywai tedf oryou.
Inoddedandt riedsohar dt osmi le,tobest r
ongbutIwasscar ed.
Me:Heybabe, theyar egoi ngt oputyout osl eepnow.Byt het i
meyouwakeupoursoccert eam
willbeher ewi thus.
Her:Rememberwhatt hosepamphl et ssai d?Ther eisapossi bili
tythatImi ghtnotwakeup
Yandi sa.
Me:That 'snotgoi ngt ohappen, youar egoi ngt owakeupandwhenyoudoIwi llberightby
yoursi de.
Her:IfIdon' t,i
fIdon' tcomebackpl easet akecar eoft hem.Lookaf terthem, makesur et hat
theyar eal wayshappyandsmi l
ing.Makesur ethatt heyknowaboutme, letthem knowt hatI
l
ovet hem.Fi l
lmyvoi di nt heirhear t
s.
Me:Phumibabe. ..
Iwipedhert ear s.
Her:Pl ease.
Shehel dmyhandandki ssedi t.Inoddedwi thtear sf all
ingoutofmyeyes.
Her:Don' tcr y.
Shewi pedmyt ears.
Her:IfIdi e, I
'l
ldi eahappywomanknowi ngt hatIgaveyouapi eceofme.Agi ftthatmoney
can'tbuy.
Me:Pl easedon' ttalkl iket hat,please.
Her:You' l
lbest rongYandi sa.You' llfindl oveagai nandyou' llbehappy.
Ishookmyhead.
Me:Don' tpl ease, you' llcomeback.Wewi l
lbeaf ami ly.
DrN:Okaywehavet osedat ehernow.
Me:Wai t
!Wai t!Shewi llcomebackr ight ?Shewi l
lwakeup?
DrN:Wewi lldoourbestt osaveher .
Me:Babepl easebest rong, comebackt ome.
Shenodded.
Me:Il oveyou.
Her:Il oveyou.
Itookherhandandki ssedi t.
Me:You' llwakeup, fightt obecomebackt ous.
Againshenodded.
DrN:I 'lldomybestt omakesur et hatyourbabi esar ei nperfectheal th.
Her:Thankyou.
DrN:Youcansedat ehernow.
Thedoct ori njectedherandt oldhert ocountt o100i fshecoul d.Shej ustchuckl edandl ooked
atmemi mi ng" Iloveyou" .Ikissedherhandandspoket ohert illshefellasleep.
DrDavi s:Wehavet omovehert ot het heat renow.
Inodded.
DrN:Doyouwantt obet her eforyourbabi es'birth?
Me:Yes, ofcosyes.
Shesmi l
edandgavemeagownandheadgear , Iputt hem onast heypushedherbedoutoft he
room.If ollowedaf tert hem put t
ingont hegl ovest heygavet ome.Iwant edt obet heref ortheir
birt
h.
.
Wegott ot het heatreandt heymovedf ast,washedherbodyandmadesur ethatever ythingwas
readyf ort hebabi es.Thei ncubat orandoxygenmasks, everyt hing.Afterwashi ngherbodyt hey
madeasmal lcutr ightbel owherbel lybut ton, Iwaswat chingt hewhol et hing.DrNhl aphot ook
outthef i
rstbaby, hewast iny.Godhewassmal landpi nk,tearsfelloutofmyeyes.Ismi l
ed
andwi pedmyf aceasat i
nycr yf i
lledt her oom.
"It
'saboy" ,shegavehi mt oanur se.Shequi cklywi pedhi mt henplacedhi mi ntot
hei ncubator
,
DrDavi scheckedhi mt henconnect edal lsortsofpi pestohi m.
Me:I shef i
ne?
Henodded.Ever yt
hinghappenedf ast,theyr emovedal loft
hem.Theyal lcameoutcr ying
besidesmyl astborn, hewasj ustqui et.Theycl eanedandst i
tchedPhumiupt henputa
bandageoverhercutasDrDavi scheckedt hel astone.
Me:Hei sstil
lnotcr ying.Whyi sn' thecr yi
ng?Whyi sn'tmysoncr ying?
DrD:Si rcalm downhei sal i
ve.
Me:Thenwhyi sn'thecr ying?
DrN:Hei sweak.
Me:Whatdoyoumeanhei sweak?
DrD:Hei sgoingt obeokay, wear egoi ngt odoal lthatwecant omakesur ethattheyar e
healthyandsaf e.
DrN:Wehavet orunt estsont hem t oseei fever ythingi sokay.I'
llbewi t
ht hem shortl
y, pl
ease
takethem t oNICU.Thenur sesnoddedandt ookt hem away.Yout oosirpleaseexcuseus, wai
t
outsideplease.
Me:Wheni smywi f
ewaki ngup?
Hel ookedatt hewat chint heroom.
DrD:Sheshoul dbeawakeanymi nut enow, pleaseexcuseus.Wewi l
lcal
lyouwh. .
.
Themachi nest art
edbeepi ngfastandl oud.
Me:What '
sgoi ngon?I smywi fegoi ngt obeokay?
DrD:Wai toutsidesir !
Me:I ssheokay?
Hepushedmeoutandnur sesrushedi n.Whati sgoi ngon?

50
Phumza:
Youknowt hatf eeli
ngwhenyouar ef eel i
ngsoatpeaceandweakt hatnomat t
erhowmuchyou
wantt of i
ghtyouj ustcan' t
?That '
showIwasf eeli
ngr ightnow, weakandatpeace.Eveni fIwas
todie, Iwoul dhavel eft6ofmebehi ndsonoonewi l
lforgetaboutme.Theycanj ustlookatmy
chil
drenandseeme.ThoughIcoul dheart hem sayi ng"don' tdieonus" ,
"comebackt ous"I
didn'
twantt o,Ihadnof i
ght i
ngspi ri
ti nme.MaybeIwant edt odiebutIcoul dn'tdiewithout
meet i
ngmyangel sandknowi ngt hatt heyareheal thyoral ive...
.
.
Yandi sa:
Iwasst i
llstandingt herepr ayingsi lent ly,Idi
dn'tevenknowwhet herGodcoul dhearmeorhe
wasr eallyther ebutIwashopi ngt hathewast hereandhecoul dhearmebecauseIcoul dn't
l
oset hemostpr ecioust hingt ome.Icoul dn'
tlosePhumi , myl if
ewoul djustgoSout hinsteadof
North...Iwoul dbedest royed!Shekeptmecomposedandi ncont r
olofmyl ife,shemademe
wantt obeabet terman.I fshewast odi eIwouldl osemysel fal
loveragain.Thedooropened
andt hef i
rstthingIsawwhenIopenedmyeyeswasmywi fe,hereyeswer ehal fopen,oxygen
maskoverhermout handnose.Ismi ledandf ollowedaf terthem asshewast akent oanot her
room, wher eshecoul dr ecover .Iwal kedi naft
ert hedoct or, DrDaviswaswi thher .IguessDr
Nhlaphowaswi ththeki ds.
Him:Sheneedst orest,don' tstayf ort oolong.
Me:I sshegoi ngt obeokay?
Him:Shei sgoi ngt obef inebutt akei teasyonher .Wegaveherst rongmedi cat i
on, i
twillput
hertosl eepi nthenextf ewmi nut es.
Me:Thankyou.
Ilookedathert henwal kedovert oherbed.
Me:Howar eyouf eeli
ng?
Sher emovedt hemask.
Her:Li keIhavebeenhi tbyat ruck.
Ismi ledandki ssedherl i
ps.
Me:Butyoust il
ll ookbeaut i
ful.
Her:Youj ustsayi ngt hat ...Di dwedoi t
?
Me:Wedi di tbutt heyar est il
lsmal landunderi nt ensi vecar e.
Her:Ar et heyheal t
hy?
Me:Theyar est illrunni ngt est st omakesur et hatever ythi
ngi sf ine.
Her:Di dt heyl ookf ine?
Me:Yesbabe, youhavet obest rongandgetwel lsoon.
Ididn'twantt owor ryher , shel ookedl i
keshewasunderal otofpai n.
Her:Idon' tknowwhatt heygavemebutmymi ndi sshut t
ingdown.
Me:Theygaveyoust rongmedi cation,itwi l
lhel pyou.
Shenodded.
Me:Letmegot el lever yonet hegoodnews, I'
llseeyouwhenyouwakeup.
Agai nshenodded.
Me:Il oveyouandt hankyou, youmademeaf ather .
Shesmi ledashereyescl osed.Ipeckedherl ipst henputt hemaskbackonherandwal kedout.
Iwentt ot hewai t i
ngr oom.
Me:Iam af athert oei ghtbeaut iful boys.
Them:Ei ght ?!
Me:Ei ght ,Idon' tknowwher et heot hert wower ehi ding.
Mom:Whydon' tyoul ookl i
keyouhappy?
Phumi 'smom:Howi sPhumza?
Me:Phumzai sr eal lyweakbutshei sreceivingt hebestcar e, r
ightnowshei ssleeping.
Zethu:Andt heboys?
Me:Idon' tknow, thel astonel ookedweak.Hedi dn'tevencr y.
Mom:Hei sgoi ngt obeokay.
Me:Ohmayoushoul dseet hem, t
heyar esot inyandpi nk.Icoul dseet heirbl oodvei ns.
Mom:Theyar epr emat urekal okbaby, theirski nhasn' tf ul
lydevel oped.
Me:Iam scar edt heyl ookedsopal e, Idon'twantt oloset hem.Atf irstIt houghtIwasf i
newi th
l
osingt hem butwhenIsawt hem, whenIhear dt hem cr y..
.Tear sofj oy, thisuncondi tionallove
justcamei ntomyhear t.Thi sf eel i
ngofwant ingt opr otectthem.
Mom:That '
scal ledbei ngapar ent.
Olwet hu:Andt heyar egoi ngt obej ustf inebhut i
, youneedt ost ayposi tive.
Inodded.
Lubanzi :Congr atul ati
onsandwel comet of ather hood.
Mom &Phumi '
smom:Wel comet opar enthood.
Ismi led.
Me:YeahI 'm apar entnow.
Zethu:I tsl ikeyouknewt hatt heywer ecomi ng.
Me:Ij ustcamehomet odot hei rshoppi ngbutIguessi twast owel comet hem.
Mom:Sowhatar et heywear ingnow?
Me:Not hingbayabhunj uza.( thenaked)
Theyl aughed.
Phumi 'smom:Youyout hoft oday, inourt i
meweal wayshadcl othesr eadybecausewedi dn't
knowwhenyouwi llcome.
Me:I '
ll gett hecl ot hesaf terseei ngt hem.
"Whowoul dl iket oseet hel i
ttleangel s?",wel ookedatDrNhl apho.
Mom:Howar et hey?
Dr:Thegoodnewsi st hat7oft hem ar eheal thy, theirlungsar ef ull
ydevel oped, thei
r
brain..ever yt hingbesi dest heirski n.Buti t
snot hingt owor ryabout ,i
naf ewdaysi twillbefull
y
developed.
Me:Andt heot herone?
Dr:Hi sl ungswer est i
lldevel opi ng,hewasn' tget tingenoughoxygenwhi chi sunder standabl e
becauset heywer eshar ingt hesamesacandai r.Buti twor kedasadi sadvant aget oal lofthem
becauset het est sshowt hatt her ewasashor tageofai rbeingpassedi nt ot heirlungs.Whi chis
whyyoursoni sweak, hewasn' tgr owi ngatt hesamepaceast heot her s.
Me:Butyou' lldoever ythingf orhi mr i
ght ?Hewi llbeokay?Theywi llbeokay?
Dr: Theyar er ecei vingt hebestcar er i
ghtnow, wewi l
lkeept hem moni tored.Ever ymi nuteof
ever yhourwewi llbebyt heirside.
Me:Okaysowher ear ethey?
Dr: Pleasecomewi t
hmebutbef or eyougoi npl easepr epar eyourhear ts, best rongbecause
theyar econnect edt oal lsor tsofmachi ner y.
Wenodded.
Dr: Andl astly, pleaseuset hissoapt owashyourhands.Theyar ever yvul ner able.
Itookt hesoapandwef ollowedaf terthedoct or ,west ar t
edbywashi ngourhandsf i
rstt
henwe
wenti nt ot hei rroom.I twassowar m kamnandi .Iwal kedovert ot hei rbeds, t
heywer ein
separ at eincubat ors.Myhear tjustbr okei nt opi eceswhenIsawt hem, especi allynumber8.
Ther ewer ej ustsomanypi pesconnect edt ohi m buthel ookedpeacef ul,theyal ll
ooked
peacef ul.
Olwet hu&Zet hu:Congr atulationsbhut i.
Me:Thankyou.CanIt oucht hem?
Dr: Youhavet obegent le.
Inodded.
Dr: Justputyourhandsi nt hehol es.
IdidsoandImustsayt ouchi ngt hem f eltgood, theywer er eall
yher e.Final lyIwasr esponsibl
e
foryetanot hersoul 'shappi nessei thert hanj ustmywi f
eandt heusualsuspect s.
Me:Heyboys, itsme.Yourf ather, it
sahonourt omeetandbeyourf ather .Mommyi snother e
fornowbutIpr omi set hatyouwi llmeetherl ateron.Wepr omi set ol oveandpr otectyou, j
ust
best r
ong.Iknowyouar ebecauseyouhavet heDl ami nibl oodr unni ngt hroughyourvei ns.I
l
oveyou.
Mom:Hayinokot heyar ebet t
ert hanyouwhenyouwer et hisyoungsot heywi llsurvive.
Lubanzi :Of cost heywi l
l,theyhaveQhawe' sbl oodandt heyar est rong.
Mom:Youhear dt hat ?Ohyourf atherwoul dbesopr oudofyou.
Zet hu:Hewoul dsay" hayi nyanauyi ndoda, uZi ziwenyani .Awudl aliawubet hiecal eniandthat's
howweZi zimendoi t"
Ilaughed.
Mom:Uf uzilewadewedl ula.
Me:UZi zikal oku. ..
Mom:Iam pr oudofyouandIam sur ethatwher everhei s,hei spr oudofyou.
Me:Thankyoumama.
Mom:Iam agr andmot her .
Phumi 'smom:Congr atulationsmakhul u, hayibakuupgr adile.
Mom l aughed.
Mom:Thatmakest het woofus, congr at ulations.Iknewchoosi ngyourdaught erwasno
mi stake.
Me:Atal lmama, shei sst rongandshemademeaman.
Olwet hu:Andaf ather .
Me:Andaf ather .
Zet hu:Andmeanaunt .
Olwet hu:Met oobutt heywontcal lmet hat , Ol wet hui sf ineandi funikuguga.
Wel aughed.
Me:Youol dqha.Thankyouguys.
Them:Hayiwet huwef ami ly.
Zet hu:Sowhatar et heirnames?
Me:I '
l
l wai tformywi fe,wewi l
lnamet hent oget her .
Mom:WhydoIgetaf eelingt hatyouhaven' tevent houghtofnames?
Me:WhenIsawt hem af ewnamescamet omi ndsot hatcount sforsomet hi
ng.
Theyl aughed.
Me:Mamayou' llhel pmewi t
ht hei rshoppi ngr i
ght ?
Mom:Wewi lldot hei rshoppi ng, wenagoandhaveabat h.Eatandbest rongf orwhenyourwi fe
wakesup.Zet huwi l
lhel pyoupr epar ehersomet hi ngt oeat ,shewi llwakeuphungr yandt i
red.
Foodwi llhelpherr egai nherst r
engt h.
Phumi '
smom:Makehersoup, adel iciouson.I twillhelpherr egainal lthest r
engt hshel ost.
Wenoddedandsai dbyet ot hebabi est henwal kedout .Mom' sdr iverwaswai tinginthecarso
theygotonanddr oveof f.Ol wet hu, Zet huandIgoti nwi thLubanziandhedr oveust omyhouse.
.
Whenwegott her ehepar kedt henwegotof fandwal kedi n.Iwentst r
aightt omyr oom and
thent ot hebat hr oom, Ihadashowerf astt hendr essedup.Af terthatImadet hebedand
moppedPhumza' sbl oodof fthef loort henopenedt hewi ndowf orsomef reshai r
.ThenIwent
tot hekit chent oseewhatt heywer emaki ng, what evert heywer emaki ngsmel tgreat.
Me:Ar eyoudone?Iwannabet her ewhenshewakesup.
Zet hu:Rel axandsi tdown.Youal sohavet oeat .
Me:Iam nothungr y.
Olwet hu:Shoul dwecal lmom?
Isatdownont heki tchenhi ghchai r
, Olwet hugavememyf oodsoIat e.Lubanzij oi
nedusaf ter
af ewmi nut es, theygavehi m hisf oodt oo.Af tereat i
ngIgotupandputt hedi shesi nthesink.
Me:Maybeshei sawakenow.
Zet hu:Youhaven' tevenpackedhercl eanpaj amasandhert oiletr
ies.
Me:EyIdon' tknowwher emymi ndi s,I'
llgodoi tnow.
Ijoggedt ot hebedr oom andpackedPhumi abagt henwel eftforthehospi t
al.
.
Whenwegott ot hehospi talshewasal r eadyawakeandl ookingar oundt heroom.
Me:Heyyou.
Her :Hey.
Webabyki ssed.
Me:Howar eyouf eel i
ngnow?
Her :Ihaveat er ri
bleheadacheandmyspi nalcor dhur ts.
Me:Hasadoct orbeenher etoseeyou?
Shenodded.
Her :Shesai di thappensbutshegavemepi llst otakeaf t
ereat i
ng.
Me:Okaysoyoushoul deatnow, Icookedf oryou.
Ihel pedhert osi tupt henf edher .
Her :Youdi dn'tmaket his.
Ismi l
ed.
Me:Wel lZet huandOl wet hudi d.
Shesmi led.
Her :Iknowi t
.Wher ear et hey?Ihaven' tseenanyoft hem, notevenmymot her.
Justt hent heywal kedi nwi thabunchofbal loonswr i
tt
en" Itsaboy" ,
Ihaven' tevent oldhert he
sexoft hebabi es.Theyevenhadacake, wr itt
en" Wel comet opar ent hoodmom anddad" .I
chuckl edandgotup.
Them:Congr atul ationsandwel comet ot hel andofsl eeplessni ght s.
Phumi :Ohyouguys.
Me:Thi si ssosweetofyou.
Phumi :Toosweet ,thanks.
Hermom:Howar eyou?
Phumi :I'm okaymama.
Hermom:Haveyouseent hem?
Phumi :Ist illhavet ohaveabat ht enIcangot ot hem.
Mom:Thenwecanqui cklybat ht hem whi leyouhaveabat htoo.
Me:Begent lemamapl ease.
Mom:HayisukaIhadyouandyoursi ster sIknowhowt odot his.
Phumzat ookmyhandandki ssedi t.
Zet hu:Ani sat handani shame.
Mom:Whi chi sgood, letsgetgoi ngmakaPhumza.
Theyst eppedout ,Zethuwentt ogetanur set ohel pPhumza.West eppedoutket owai tfor
them.
.
.
Phumza:
Af t
ert akingashowerIgotdr essedi npaj amasandagownt hensati nthewheel chair.Mybody
hur t,ever yi nchofi tsoIcoul dn' twal k.Thenur sehel pedmet ogett omyr oom t henYandi sa
tookover ,hepushedmet owher etheki dswer e.Wewal kedi ntot hisbusyr oom, nurseswer e
doi ngt heirr ounds.Checki ngupont hebabi est hent heywal kedout .
Yandi :Bef or ewewal kovert othem t her eissomet hingt hatIneedt otellyou.
Me:What ?Ar et heyokay?
Hi m:Babycomedownpl ease, its8oft hem.
Ichuckl ed.
Me:What ?Thedoct orsai d6.
Hi m:Wel lwehave8t wi nsandt heyar eal l boys.
Me:Notevenonegi rl
?
Hi m:Nope, nogi rl
smyl ove.
Me:That '
sbadmosbutQhawewher ewer et hey?Theot hert wo.
Hi m:Idon' tknowbabe, Ireal lydon' tknow.
Mom:Her ei smommy.
Ismi l
ed.
Me:Sowhoi st he1stbor n?Ar et heser eallymyki ds?
Mom:Fora18yearol duyazal a.
Ismi l
edandl ookedatt heoneYandi sapoi ntedt o.
Hi m:Thi si sourf i
rstbor n.
Me:Whyi shesosmal l?
Mom l aughedatt hesamet imeasDrNhl aphowal kedi n.
Dr :Ithi nkt heyar ereadyf orf eedi ng.
Me:Feedi ng?
Dr :Br east f eedi ng, Iwi llmoni toryou.
Me:Youexpectmet ot ouchhi m?
Dr :Howcanyoubr east feedwi thoutt ouchi nghi m?
Shesai dopeni ngt hei ncubat or ,sher emovedal lthe" pipes"andwr appedhi mi nabl ankett hat
mom gavet oher .Shet hepl acedhi mi nmyar ms, hewassol ightthough.I tdidn'tfeell ikeIwas
car ryingahumanbei ngi nmyhands.
Dr :Youwontdr ophi m, relax.Yougott his.Youshoul dal wayscl eanyourni pplesbef or efeeding,
usehotwat erever ytime.Themi lkthatcomesf r
om yourbr eastsist heheal thi
estsost ickt oit,
it
wi l
l hel pt hem gr owf ast erandst ronger .
Inoddedt henl ift
edmyt opup, Iwi pedmyni ppleswi that owelshegavet ome.Af tert hatIf eed
him, i
tj ustcamenat ur ally.Hecl osedhi smout honmyni ppleandsuckedonwhi chf eltwei rd
butIgotusedt oi t.Yandi sawasbusyt aki ngpi cturesofusandt heot herones.
Hi m:Sobabehowdoyouf eel?
Me:Whatar eyoudoi ngr eal ly?
Hi m:Maki ngavi deot oshowt hem whent heyar eall grownup.
DrNhl aphoandourmot her sl aughed.
Me:Yousowhi te.
Hi m:Cal lmewhi teal lyoul ike,howdoesi tfeel?
Me:Wei rd, Ican' tbel i
evet hatIam doi ngt his.
Hi m:Butyoul ookl i
keapr o.
Ichuckl edandl ookeddownatbaby.
Dr :Thatshoul ddot het rick, i
tst imet of eedanot herone.
Itookmyni ppl eoutofhi smout handDrNhl aphot ookhi m, heplacedhi m backi nhis" bed"and
connect edal lt het hingst hatwer econnect edt ohim.Shegavemeanot herone. .
.Byt het imeI
finishedf eedi ngt hel astonemyni ppleswer esor ebuti twaswor thit,event hepai nthatIwasi n.
Itwaswor thi t.
Dr :Iwi l
lleaveyout oconnectbutpl easegobackt oyourbedandr est.Iwi l
lcomebackt ogive
yout het estr esul ts.
Sher anBPandsomet est snj et omakesur ethatever ythingwasokaywi t
hme.Inoddedand
l
ookedatmysons, feltgoodsayi ngt hat .
Hi smom:Sowhatar et hei rnames?Wecan' tcallthem PhumzaDl ami ni1,2and3l i
ket heyar e
register edher e.
IlookedatYandi sa, Ididn'tmi ndcal li
ngt hem t hat.Theywer emi neaf t
erall.
Him:Wel lIwast hinkingt hatwecal lthem;1.Si yabul
ela, nge2. Sibusi
soset hu, 3.Luvuyo
olukhul uukubanabo( wear ehappyt ohavet hem) ,balu4.Lonwabo, no5.Vuyol wethu(theyar
e
ourhappi ness) ,bal i6.Qhayi yakut hi(theyar eourpr i
deandj oy),7.Si
bulele, nge8.Nkosana
zethu( t
hankyouf orourpr inces)
Ismi led, Ilovedwhathedi dwi t
ht henames.
Me:Si yabul ela,Si busiso, Luvuyo, Lonwabo, Vuyol wethu, Qhayi yaandNkosana.Whendi dyou
comeupwi thsuchnames?
Him:I fyoudon' tl ikethem wecan. .
.
Me:Not heybeaut if
ul,Ilovet hem.AndIl ovet hemeani ngf ulstorybehindthenames, Ilove
everyt hingaboutt hem.
Ourmot her s:Theyar ereal lybeaut if
ul.
Him:Li ket hem, Ican' tbelievet hatt heyar er eallyherewi thus.
Me:Thatmakest het woofus.
Icoul dn' tgetmyeyesof ft hem.Theywer ereal lybeautiful.
Him:Thankyoumyl ove.
Me:I twasapl easur ecar ryingt hem.
Hepeckedmyl i
ps.
Him:Weshoul dgetyoubackt obed.
Me:Justaf ewmor emi nut es, Idon' twantt oleavet hem.
Him:Yeahme2especi all
yhi m, iNkosanakat atakhe.
Ourl astbor nhewasr eall
yt i
nykeyena.
Me:Hewi llbef i
ne, hewi llgr owl i
kehi sbr other .
Him:Idon' tknowhowyoumanaget obesocal m andposi t
iveaboutever ything.
Me:BecauseIt rustGod, hewontt aket hem away.Theywi l
lbef i
ne,especiallyhim.
Hesmi ledandr ubbedmyshoul derst henki ssedmyf orehead.
Him:Youhavet or est.
Inoddedandhet ookmebackt omyr oom.AssoonasIgotonbedIcl osedmyeyesand
thankedGodf orhi sbl essingsandt hepr otect i
onher el
easedovermyangel s.

51
PARENTHOOD:
Phumza:
Anur sewokemeupear lyint hemor ningt ohaveabat handeatsoIcoul dtakemymeds.Af ter
takingmymedsIhadt ogobat handf eedt hebabi essoIheadedt otheNICU.Icaref
ull
ywi ped
them wi tht hewat erthenur sepr eparedf ormet henchangedt heirnappi
esandsocks, those
wer et heonl yclot hestheywer ewear i
ng.DrNhl aphowal kedint ohelpmef eedthem,this
doct ort hough!Iwasgoi ngt obef orevergr atefultoher.Afterfeedingthem Iwentbackt omy
room, theyl ef
tmeexhaust edsoIf ellasleepi mmedi at
elyaf t
erget t
ingonbed.
.
Iwaswokenupbysomeonepl ayingwi t
hmyhand, Iopenedmyeyest oYandisa.Ismil
edand
stretched.
Him:Mr sMe
Me:Hey, whendi dyougether e?
Hehel pedmet osi tup.
Him:About5mi nut esago.
Me:Whydi dn'
tyouwakemeup?
Him:Youl ookedpeacef ul,Ibroughtyout heset obri
ghtenyourr oom ali
tt
lemor e.
Hepoi nt edt oabunchoff lower s.
Me:Theybeaut iful,whataret hey?
Hesmi l
ed.
Him:Li l
ies.
Me:Zi ntlet hankyou.
Him:Notmor et hanyou.
Heki ssedmyl ips.
Him:Sohaveyouseent hem t oday?
Me:Isawt hem t hismor ning.
Henodded.
Him:Andhaveyoueat en?
Me:Iat et hismor ning.
Him:Gr eatbecauseIbr oughtyout hi s,yourmot hermadei tforyou.
Hegavemeaf oodhol der .
Me:I sshecomi ngt oday?
Him:Iam notsur e,maybel at er.
Me:Al ri
ght .
Iopenedt hef oodhol der, i
tsmel treal lygr eatsoIf east ed.DrNhl aphowal kedi nassoonasI
fi
ni shedeat i
ng.
Her :Mor ning!Mor ning!Howi sournewmot herf eeli
ngt oday?
Me:Not hi nghaschanged, Iam st illinpai n.
Her :Thesewi l
lhel peaset hepai n.
Shegavemepi l
lssoIt ookt hem.
Her :Andi tstimef oryout ogof eedt hem.
Inodded, Yandi sahel pedmei ntoawheel chai rt henpushedmet owher et hebabi eswer e.Dr
Nhl aphohel pedmet of eedt hem, afterdoi ngsoIchangedt heirnappi es.Wespentaf ew
mi nuteswi ththem t henl eftt hem t or est.Iwentt ochangemysani taryt owelt henwentbackt o
myr oom.
.
WhenIgott her eIgotont hebedandsatback, Yandisasatont hebed.Het ookmyhandand
kissedi t.
Me:Youl eavingt oni ght?
Him:Nopemybossgavemet woweeksof f,Iwashopi ngt ogetamont hbutIhaveal ready
abusedmyl eavedays.
Isighedoutofr elief, Ididn'twanthi mt ol eavesosoon.
Me:That '
ssomet hing, Iwi ll haveheal edbyt henandourbabi eswi llbest r
ongbyt hen.
Him:Yeahbutyou' l
lst il
lneedme, theywi llneedme.
Me:Iwi llhaveourmot her sandsi ster stohel pmesoi tsf i
ner eally.
Him:Ar eyousur e?
Me:Yeah.
Him:I '
l
l comebackever yweekendt illthepr ojecti scompl eted.
Inodded.Hel eanedi ntoki ssmyl i
ps, weshar edashor tki ss.Webr okei tandst aredint oeach
other s'eyes, theyspokesomucht ruth.
Him:Yousobeaut iful.
Me:HayisukaYandi saudl alangam.
Him:Iam t ell
ingyou.( Ismi led)CanIcuddl eyou?Imi ssyou.
Inoddedandmademor espacef orhi m.Hesatnextt omeandcuddl edme, ofcosImi ssedhi m
too.Thi shospi talbedwasr eal l
ylonel y,Imi ssedwaki ngupnextt ohi m.
>>>>
Dayswentbyr eallyf ast ,almostl i
ket heywant edmeandYandi sat osepar ater eal l
ysoon.
Thought heywentf astsomet hingposi ti
vehappeneddur ingt hosedays.Iwasheal i
ngever yday,
mybl oodpr essur ewasbackt onor mal .ThankGodf ort hatandmyboyswer egr owi ngst ronger
andheal t
hierever yday.Theywer est ar t
ingt olookmor el ikehumanbei ngsandl essscar y, Dr
Nhl aphosai dt heywer egai ningwei ghtbutIdi dn'tseeal loft hat .Theywer est il
lt helit
t l
est
peopl eIhaveeverseen.Iwasget ti
ngdi schar gedi n2weeksbutt hel ittl
eDl ami niswer egoi ng
tost ayf oryetanot hermont ht il
lDrNhl aphosai di twassaf ef ormet ot aket hem homewi thme.
Anywayt odayYandi sawasl eaving, hewasgoi ngbackt owor k.Myhear twasheavy, Ididn' t
wanthi mt oleaveyet .ThewayYandi saandIhaveneverspentt hatmuchamountoft imet o
toget herbekumel engabeIam usedt onothavi nghi m ar oundmebutIwasn' t.Ijustwant edhi m
nextt omeever yday, kant iwhywasImar riedt ohi mi fIwasn' tgoi ngt ospendt imewi thhi m?
ButIwasgr atefulf ort heef for themade.Thedoorswungopenandhewal kedi ndr essed
proper ;ingr eyj eans, blackt -shirt,bl ackcoatandbl ackadi ddassneaker s.Isatupast ears
war medmyeyes, i
fhewasdr essedl ikethatt henhewasl eavi ng.
Him:Sowuyakhal akodwaIhaven' tevensai danyt hi
ng.
Me:Thewayyoudr essedsaysi tall.
Him:Butt hereisnoneedf oryout obesadmyl ove,
I'
llbehomeever ySat urdayandSunday.
Me:But .
..
Him:Shhh. ..
Heputhi sindexf i
ngerovermyl i
pst hencar essedmyf acegent ly,Istaredi ntohiseyes.He
kissedmyl ipsgent lyandIr esponded, f
ollowi nghislead.Myt onguet ent ati
velystrokehisand
joinedhi si nasl ower ot icdancewhi chsentt i
nglest
omyf airy.ThoughIdi dn'twanttheki ssto
endIhadt obr eaki tbef orei tgotoutofhand, itwasthefirsttimeheeverki ssedmel i
ket hat.He
smi ledandpeckedmyl ips.
Him:Youar eaf astl ear ner.
Me:Youar eagoodt eacher .
Agai nhepeckedmyl ips.
Him:Ipr omi set ocomebackst handwasam.
Me:Wewi llbewai tingf oryou.
Henoddedandweshar edaki ssbutbr okei taf t
erafewmi nutes.
Him:Ishoul dgoseet heboys.
Me:Ihavet ofeedt hem anyway.
Him:Let sgot oget hert hem.
Igotof fthebedandwor emysl eeper s.Het ookmyhandandwewal kedt otheNI CU.
.
Whenwegott her eIsatont hechai randf eedt hem onebyonewi t
hanur se'shelp.Whi l
et heir
fatherspoket ot hem, afterf eedi ngNkosanaIgavehi mt ohi sfather.Thoughhewasaf r
ai dof
hol dingthem het ookhi m andki ssedhi sf orehead.
Him:I Nkosanayam madoda.Daddyi sgoi ngawayf oraf ewdays, hewi llbebackt hough.But
whi leIam gonepl easel ookaf termommy, t
reatherwellningamhl uphi .(hegavehi mt othe
nur seandsheputhi m backi nhi sincubat or)Daddyl ovesyouandhewi llcomebackaf teraf ew
days, don'tgrowt oof astbecauseIwantt oshar eandwi tnessever ymomentwi thyou.Il ove
youboysandIl ovemommyt oo.
Hewr appedhi sar m ar oundmywai standki ssedthesideofmyhead.
Me:Il oveyout oo.
Him:Mor et hananyt hingi nt hiswor ld.
Me:Mor et hananyt hingi nthi swor ld.
Weshar edashor tki sst henhesai dhi sfinalgoodbyest otheboysandwewal kedout .Wewent
tomyr oom.
Him:Takecar eofyour selfandt akei teasy.
Me:Nawet akecar eofyour sel f.
Him:Ipr omi se.
Me:Thennam Ipr omi se.
Him:Il oveyou.
Me:Loveyoumor e.
Heki ssedmyf oreheadt henhuggedme.
Him:Ihavet ogonow.
Inoddedandwebr oket hehug.
Him:Lubanzi i
swai ti
ngf orme.
Me:Okayhaveasaf et ri
p.
Him:Thankyoumyl ove.CanIgetaki ssbef oreIgo?
Me:No.
Him:Youmadatme?
Me:Nobutyouknowi tssadseei ngyoul eave.
Hesmi l
ed.
Him:IknowbutIhavet oo.
Me:Iknow.
Him:Soyoust i
lldon' twantt ogi vemeaki ss?
Me:NoIdon' t.
Him:Hayi sukandi zozi that helakal ok.
Hehel dmywai standki ssedmyneckt henl i
ps.Weshar edal ongpassi onatekissthenhe
walkedoutwi thoutevenl ookingbackatme.Mci m Igotont hebedandt ookmyphone.I
decidedt ocal lBul elwa, Imi ssedherbutwej ustspokeyest erday.
.
.
Yandisa:
Lubanzidr ovemet otheai rport.Whenwegott her eIthankedhi mt hengotof f
,hegotof fwith
meandwal kedmei nside.
Me:Pl easedomeonel astf avour .
Him:Anyt hing.
Me:Getmywi fesomef ruit
sandaboxofchocol ates.
Him:Today?
Me:Yeahnowi fyoudon' tmi nd.
Him:Al right.
Me:Packever yt hingi ntoabasketne?Andaskt hem t owr apitli
ket hosegif
tbasket s.Iwantit
tobeal it
tler omant ic,getherar oset oo.
Hel aughed.
Him:Whathaveyoudonet oYandi sa?
Ilaughedt oo.
Me:Thi sisYandi sa, j
ustacr azyi nloveYandi sa.
Him:Icanseet hat , MrRomant ic.
Me:Af t
ergi vingbi r thtooursonsshedeser vesi t
.
Him:Shedoesyena.
Me:Yeahsoyouwi lldot hatr ight ?
Him:Sur e.
Me:I '
lldeposi tmoneyi ntoyouraccountr i
ghtnowt henyoucandoi t,
theremustbeacar dtoo.
"Thinkingofyou"shoul dbet hemessage.
Him:Goti t.
Me:Ioweyou.
Him:Justt reatherwel l,shel ovesyou.
Me:Iknowandyoudon' thavet owor ryboy.
Him:Sho.Savef l
ight .
Me:Shar pandt hanksonceagai n.
Him:Youwoul ddot hesamef orme.
Inoddedandwef istbumpedt henIwentt oboar dt heplane.ItextedMandl aonmywayt othe
planet ell
inghi mt hatIwasboar di ngt hepl anenow.
.
.
Phumza:
IwaswokenupbyLubanzi shaki ngme, Ir ubbedmyeyesandl ookedathi m.
Him:Aspeci aldel iveryf oraspeci allady.
Igiggledandsatup.
Me:Youdi dn'thavet oyazi .
Him:Wel lIwoul dl ovet ot akecr edi tbuti tsnotf rom me.
Me:Whoi si tfrom?
Him:Whoel sewoul ddot hisridi culousr omant icgest urebesidesyourman?
Ismi l
edandt ookt hebasket ,hehuYandi sahet hinkshei ssmar tbutIam smar terthanhi m yazi
.
Het hinkshecanj ustt rickmei nt oeat ingfr ui
tsqhabywr appingthem upl olhayi!Iclapped
once.
Him:What '
swr ong?Whyar eyoul aughi ng?
Me:Af ruitbasketr eall
y?
Him:Andt woboxesofchocol ategi rlkant iwhatdoyouwant ?
Me:Chi psmaybe.
Him:Youbr east feedi ngsoyouhavet oeatheal thyf oodplusyouhavet olosesomewei ght.
Me:Youcal li
ngmef at?
Him:Nobutyouj ustdon' thaveaf i
gur eanymor e.
Il
aughed.
Me:Butatl eastthisfi
gurel
esswomani sl
ovedbyherhusband.
Him:Nodoubtaboutt hat.
Ismiledandopenedt hebasket ,Itookabanana.
Him:Youhavesuchabeaut ifulsmi le.
Ibit
eont hebananaandchewedt henswallowed.
Me:Thankyou.
Him:Andyouar ebeaut i
ful
.
Ichuckledandl ookedathim.
Me:Di dYandisat el
lyoutosayal lofthesethings?
Him:Yeahhet oldmet opasti tont oyou.Andheal sogavemethis.
Hegavemear oseandsmal lcard.Ir eadthemessageinthecar
dandsmi
led.Am Inott
he
l
uckiestthough?

52
Yandisa:
WhenIl andedi nDur banMandl awasal readywai t
ingf ormeatt heairport.Weshoul der
bumped.
Him:Congr at ul ationsman.
Me:Thankbr o.
Him:Iwantt oseet hepi ctures, howi swi f
ey?Howar emynephews?Di dyout ellthem about
uncleMandl a?
Ilaughedandgavehi m myphone.
Me:Youl ikeawoman, youhavenocommanorf ullstop.
Him:Hayi fut sekIam doi ngyouaf avouraphakant iuyanya!
Ilaughed, Iwasj ustt easinghi swhi teassbecauseIknewhewasgoi ngt of l
ip.
Me:Andyouj ustgetemot ionall iket hem, comedown.
Him:Hayi fut sek!
Me:Wi feyandt heboysar efine, theyar eget ti
ngst rongerever yday.Icantwai ttogobackhome
andseet hem, myl astbor n.INkosanayam.
Him:Ohyeshowi shenow?Whi chonei she?I nf actwhoi swho?
Ishowedhi m Nkosanat hent her est .
Him:Thesol di ers, youmustbepr oud.
Wegotont hecar ,Iwasdr i
ving.Mandl aj ustseemedsooccupi edwi t
ht hepi ctures.
Me:Ver ypr oud, If eel mor elikeaf at hernow.Don' tgetmewr ongIlovemyf i
rstbor nandIam
gladtobehi sf at herbutt hissetj ustmakesmef eel somuchl i
keaf ather.Iwast her etohear
theirf
ir
stcr yandIwast heret owel comet hem onear thunlikeQhawe.
Him:Iwontevenpr etendt ounder standbecauseIdon' t.
Me:Youwontunder standt il
l youar eaf at hervele.
Him:Awusaphaphi sani !
Ilaughed.
Him:Ar en'tt hesepi pesconnect edt ot hem scar y?
Me:Notanymor e.Wegotusedt ot hem Iguess.
Henodded.
Him:Yousai dt hisi sNkosanar ight ?
Me:Thet inni estone.
Him:Yeah, howi shenow?
Me:Bet tert hanhowhewasaf ewdaysagobuthei sst i
llweakerthant heot her s.Hei sgrowing
ataver ysl owpacewhi chwor ri
esme.Buthi smot herthinksIwor ryal ot.
Him:Youcannotnotwor r
y, j
ustl ookatt hem.Idon' tthi
nkIcanhandl eseei ngmybabyl i
kethis.
Me:That 'swhatIal sot houghtunt ilIsawandt ouchedt hem forthefirstti
me.Ir ealisedthatI
havetobest r ongandbeaf at herandhusband.
Him:Aaahboy!Boy!Ican' twai ttomeett hem.8yousai d?
Me:8ndodaandIf eelsosor r yforPhumi whenshehast ofeedthem, theydr ainher .
Him:Shei sbr east feeding?
Me:Yep!
Him:Nowondersheget sdr ained, uyadl alangal omt anamos.
Me:I fther ewasanot herwayoff eedi ngt hem Iwoul dmakesur et hatwet r
yi tbutherdoct or
advisedhert obr east feedsot hatt heywoul dgr owf ast erandst ronger .
Him:Under standabl e.
Wecont i
nuedt alkingunt ilwegott oSwazi land.
.
Whenwegott her ewewentt oourdi fferentr ooms, Ical l
edPhumif irst.Shet ookt hecallaftera
while.
Her:Hey
Icouldsenseexhaust i
oni nhervoi ce.
Me:Heyst handwasam what 'sup?Ar eyouokay?
Her:Ij ustgotbackf rom f eedi ngt hem.
Me:Iam sor r ymyl ovebutyou' llgetusedt oi t.
Her:Myni ppl eshur t,Ican' tgetusedt othat .
Me:Sor ryst handwasam.Iwascal li
ngt ot ellyout hatIam i nSwazi landnow.
Her:Al ri
ghthadasaf ef li
ght ?
Me:Yept hanksf oraski ng, didyour eceivemygi ftphezol o?
Her:Yeaht hanksi twassweetofyou.
Me:It ryf oryoursake.
Her:Iappr eci atei t.
Me:Letmecat chaf ewmi nut esofsl eepkest handwa, Ihavet obeonsi teinaf ewhour s.
Her:Okaymyl ove.
Me:Loveyou.
Her:Loveyout oo.
.
Standingi nf rontofmi rrorIputonmygr eyshi rt,tuckingi tintomybl ackr i
ppedj eans.Iputon
mycar amelt imber land( appr opr i
at eonsi t
e)t henputonaf ragrance.It akemywor kbag, keys,
phone, wat chandwal l
ett henheadf orthedoor .Iputmyphoneandwal l
etinmypockett hent r
y
toputont hewat chwi tht hebagandkeysi nmyot herhand.
"Needhel p? "
, Ist arebl ankl yather .DidIsayIneedhel p?" l
etmehel pyouYandi sa",Ioutl
inemy
armt oherandsheput sont hewat ch.Ismi l
easIl ookather , j
ustapol it
esmi l
e.
Me:Thanks.
Her:Nopr obl em.Headi ngt ot hesi t
eal r
eady?
Me:Yep, It houghtyouwoul dbet her ealreadyi nspect ingt hepl ace.
Her:Iam st i
llwai tingf orMandl a.
Me:Updat emeovercof fee, didyout akenot esoranyt hingl i
ket hat?
Her:St il
lacof feef anIsee.
Me:I talwayskeepsmeal iveandr eadyt ot akeonwhat evert hewor ldt hrowsatme.
Wesi tar oundat woseatt able,awai t
resst akesouror dert henwal ksaway.Il ookatChant elle
assheupdat esmeonwhatIhavemi ssedovert hepastf ewdays.Thewai tressbr i
ngsusour
foodasshewasst i
llfi
lli
ngmei n.
Me:Goodt oknowt hatwemovi ngataper fectpace, Icanbebackathomei mmedi atel
y.
Her:YeahIcan' twai ttoo, Imi ssmyson.
Me:Whenwast hel astt imeyouspoket ohi m?
Her:Lastni ght ,Ical lhim ever yday.
Me:Iam sur ehemi ssesyout oo.Shal lweheadt osi te?Looksl ikeMandl aisr unni nglate.
Her:Inyourcar ?(Inod)But ...
.
Me:Wear egoi ngt owor kChant ellenotf oraspi noradat e.
Isettlethebi llthenwegetupandwal ktowar dswher eIwaspar ked.Wegotont henIstar t
ed
theengi neanddr oveust ot hesi te.
.
Afterwor kIheadedbackt ot hel odge.Ipar kedt hengotof fandwal kedt omyr oom, Ineededa
shower ,i
tsbeenal ongday.Af tershower i
ngIgetoutandcheckmyphone, It houghtIhear dit
ri
ng.Aah2mi ssedcal lsf rom Mandl aandamessage, Ireadi t:'
drinkst onight ?'Itexthim back:
'
gotr easont ocel ebr ate? 'Het extsmeback:' youbecomi ngaf atheragai n'Itexthi m back:'sure
whynot ?'Het extsmeback: 'l
etsmeetatt hebar '.Iputmyphonedownandl ot i
onmybodyt hen
gotdr essedi nbl uer i
ppedj eans, greyt -shirtandwhi tesneaker s.Ibrushedmyhai rt hentook
myphone, wal letandkeys.Iheadedoutt hedoorst artingatt her estaur
anttohavesomet hi ng
toeat , afterset tl
ingt hebi llIheadedt ot hebar .AsIwal kedi nt hedoorIspottedMandl awitht he
restoft het eam st andi ngar oundt het abl eint hecor nersoIwal kedovertothem.
Them:Congr at ulat ionsdaddy!
Ilaughed.
Me:Thanksguys.
Brian:Gett hi snewf atheradr ink.
Noxol o:Fi rstt i
mef ather ?
Chant el lelookedatme, shewaspr obabl yt hi
nki ngt hatIwasn' tgoingtosayyes.
Me:NoIhavea4yearol dson.
Brian:What ?Wi thwho?
Me:Her .
Inoddedt oChant elle'ssi de.Theyl ookedatusamazed.
Noxol o:Youdon' tsay!
Mandl agavemeadr ink.
Me:Shar p!If oundoutacoupl eofmont hsback.
Shegavemet hat' didyour eal l
yhavet osayt hat 'l
ook.
Noxol o:Wowt hat 'snews.
Mandl a:Newsal right !Let st ostt oYandi saandhi ssol diers.
Them:ToYandi saandhi ssol diers!
Wecl ickedourgl assest hent ooksi ps.
Trevel yan: Let sseepi ctures.
Iunl ockedmyphonet hengavei ttohi m.
Trev:It houghtMandl awasj okingwhenhesai d8, congr atulations!Nomor eki dsafterthese
ones.
Me:Nomor eki ds, I'
m goodwi t
h9.
Mandl a:You' l
lgobr okewi thyournumberofchi ldren.
Me:Br oke?Me?Never !Idoubtt hat .
Mandl a:Yeahyeahyeah!Whoi supf ort equila?
Me:OhmyGod!Wewor kingt omor rowbutwhenwast hel astt imeIgotwast ed?Getusabot t
le.
I'
lldrinkt omyboys.
Theycheer edandgotusabot tl
eandwegotwast ed.Taki ngshot sandhavi ngbeer s,shit
!
waki ngupt omor rowwasgoi ngt obeami ssi
on!Af teraf ewshot sandbeersIwasoutofi tand
readyt ocal litani ght ,Iwasdr unkoutofmymi nd.It ookmyphonef rom Chantell
ewhowas
busyt aki ngsel fies.
Me:Whyar eyout aki ngpi ctureswi thmyphone?
Her :I'
llsendt hem t omyphonet omor r
ow.( Inodded)Goi ngt obed?
Me:Yeah.
Her :I'
llgowi thyou.
Itookherhandandhel pedheruponceshewasonherf eetIl etgoofherhandandwewal ked
towar dst heexi t.
Her :Yout hedr unkonet onight .
Me:Yeahman.
Her :Needhel p?
Ichuckl edbecauseIcoul dn' twal kinast r
aightl ine,mywal kingwaswoozy.
Me:IknowIam woozybutIcanwal kt hankyouver ymuch.
Her :Congr atulat i
ons.
Me:Thanks.
Her :Idi dn' tthinkyouwoul dment ionQhawe.
Me:Hei smysont ooyouknow.
Her :Iknow.( shel ookedup)I t
sabeaut ifulnight .
Ilookedupt oo.
Me:Beaut iful i
ndeed.
Her :Ther eusedt obeat imewher eIwasmor ebeaut i
ful.
Me:Youst i
llbeaut iful Chant elle.
Her :Yout hinkso?
Me:I tsaf act .
Her :Whendi dyouandhermeet ?
Me:Honest ly?Onourweddi ngday.
Her :Whatdoyoumeanonyourweddi ngday?
Me:Exact l
yt hat .
Her :Yandi sa. .
Icuther .
Me:Iam bei ngser i
ous, alloft hiswasar ranged.Wedi dn'tdatebef or
egoi ngi ntomar riage,I
didn'tcheatonyouwi thher .
Her :Butyoul ovehernow?
Me:Il ovehernow.
Her :Whydi dn' tyout ellme?
Itookherhandandpul ledhert otheswi mmi ngpoolar ea.Wesatont hechai r,herbet weenmy
l
egs.
Me:Iam t i
r edoft al kingaboutt hi
sar en'tyou?
Her :Iwantt omoveonYandi sabutIcan' tbecauseIkeeponhopi ngthatoneday. ..
Me:ThatonedayCha, itwi l
lneverhappen.Weca. ..
Her :Ijustwantanswer sYandi sa,whenyouusedt ocheatYaatl eastt henyouusedcomeup
withsomesor tofexpl ainorl i
e.
Me:I 'm dr unkChant ellet hel astthingIwantt odoi stalk.
Her :Younevergi vemet het i
meoft hedaywhenyousober .
Me:Okaywhatdoyouwantt oknownow?
Her :Whydi dn' tyout ellme?Whydi dn'tyouf i
ghtf orus?Wasn' tIworthf ightingf or?
Me:Iwi llgi veyout het imeoft hedayt omor row, I
'l
ltakeyououtf orlunchandwecant alkokay?
Her :CanIspendt heni ghtwi thyou?
Me:Cha. .
.
Her :PleaseYandi saIj ustwantt obei nyourar ms,justthisonce.
Ishookmyheadandst oodupt henwal kedaway.
Her :What '
ssospeci alabouther ?!
Ishr ugged.
Me:Iwasherf irst,Iguesst hat'swhatmakeshersospeci al.
Ireallydi dn' tknowwhatmadeherspeci albutshewas.
Her :Youwer emyf irstt oobutIdon' t,neversawyout r
eat i
ngmel i
keaqueen.Eversi nce...Do
youf eel disgust edbyme?
Me:Whatdoyouwantmet odo?Iam mar riedf orGod' ssake!
Shegotupandwal kedt owar dsme.
Her :Iaskedyouaquest ion.
Me:Whywoul dIbedi sgust edbyyou?
Her :Younevercheat edonmeYandi sabutaf tert
hati ncident.
..
Me:Chapl easedon' tsayt hatbecauset hat '
snotwhathappened.
Her :Thenwhat ?Thi ngsusedt obesoper f
ectbet weenusandevent houghyoucheat edyou
sti
lllovedme, youcar ed.Youwoul dnevert al ktomet hewayyoudonow, youneverl ookedat
mei ndisgust .
Me:Ist i
llcar ebutIam mar riedr i
ghtnow.
Her :Iknowyoumar ried.Iknowyoul oveherbutIknowyoul ovemet ooandIst illl
oveyout oo.
Me:Al loft hisj ustt ospendani ghtwi thme?
Her :NobutIwoul dl iket ospendoneni ghti nyourar msf oroldtimessake.Onet hought less,
painless, tearf reeni ght .
Itookadeepbr eat h.Iwasdr unkbutnotdr unkenought oletChant el
let akeadvant ageofme, I
woul dt akeupanygi r l
'sof ferbutj ustnotChant el
le.
Me:Youwantmedr unk?
Her :Wewoul dn' tbehavi ngt hisconvoi fyouwer esober .
Me:Youwontaskf ormor e?
Her :Iwontaskf ormor e.
Me:I fIl etyouspendt heni ghti nmyr oom, inmyar mst omor r
owi sn'thappeni ng.
Her:Youbei ngunf ai
r.
Me:Noyout heonewhoi sbeingunfai
r.Iwontlockmydoor ,Iwontwai tforyou, Iwil
lletyou
decide.
Iwalkt omyr oom, unlockandgoi nthenclosethedoor .Ileaveitunlocked,Ican'tbel
ievet hatI
am doi ngt
his.Iundr essthengetinbedandt urnthelightsoffandcl osemyeyes.Af terafew
secondsIheart hedooropenandcl ose,Istr
etchmyar m andturnont hel i
ght.Shewasl eaning
againstthedoor .
Her:IwantyousoberYandi sa,wenotgoingtodol unchtomor row.Iwi l
lspendt henightinyour
arms, comel ockthedoor .
Me:Hayi keChant ell
etakethekeyandl ock,I
'l
lcallyouinthemor ni
ngt oopenf orme.
Her:Okay.
Itur
nedt helightoffandf el
lasleepi
mmedi atel
y.

53
Yandi sa:
Iwokeupwi that erri
bleheadache, gosh!hangoverj eez!Iputmyhandsovermyeyesandr ub
them gent l
y, fuckl astni ghtwasl it!Igetof fbedandopent hewi ndow, Iwasf eelinghotnjeallof
asudden.It aket hephoneont hesi deofmybedandcal lr oom serviceor deri
ngcof feethenIgo
forashower .
.
Byt het imeIf i
nishedshower ingmycof feewasatt hedoor .Wr appingat owelovermybodyI
attendt ot hedoor ;"wher eismykey? "Il ookar oundt heroom." wheret hef ucki smykey?Hang
onIam st i
lllooki ngf ormykey! "Howdr unkwasIl astnight ?Okayt hink, r
et r
aceyourst eps...
Chant elle!Ipi ckupmyphoneanddi alhernumber .
Her :I'
m comi ng.
Shedr opst hecal l
.Af t
eraf ewsecondsmydooropens, Igetmycof f eeandt i
pt heguy.OkayI
l
ookatChant ell
e.
Me:Howdr unkwasIl astni ght ?
Her :Youcan' trememberanyt hing?
Me:Somet hi ngsar evivi d!Bl urry.
Her :Intimeyou' llremember .
Shewal ksoutofmyr oom, ohwel l!It akeasi pofmycof feet henanot herandanot her.
..IputI
downt henl otionandgetdr essed.Af terthatIheadt othemycaranddr ovet othesite.
.
AsIsatdownonmychai raf teri nspect ionandt alkingt ot hecl i
entsal lofl astnight'
smemor i
es
comef l
oatingt omymi nd, gr eat!Imadepl answi thChant elle!Perfect !Wayt ogoYandi sa!Way
togo!Justt henshewal ksi ncar ryingt wocof fees.
Her :Mandl ai sn'tcomi ng, hej ustdr oppedmeof f.Yourcof fee.
.
Shepl acedi tont hedeski nf rontofme.
Me:Thanks.
Ifeltit,i
twasst illhot.Justt hewayIl ikei t
.
Me:Youl atet hough.
Her :IknowhenceIbr oughtyoucof feeaspeaceof fer i
ng.
Ismi ledandchuckl edatt hesamet i
me.
Me:Chacanwenotdowhatwepl annedt odo, Ican' tletyouspendt heni ghti nmybed.
Her :Ithoughtyouwoul ddot hatonceyouar ei nyoursenses.
Me:Iam sor rybut .
..
Her :Yandi sa!Icoul dhaveeasi l
yt akenadvant ageofyoul astnight,youwer ereadyt oletme
spendt heni ghtinyourar ms.ButIdi dn'tbecauseIknewyouwoul dwakeupwi thregretand
angr yatme.
OfcosIwasgoi ngt owakeupmadather !Sheknowsver ywel lnottot akeadvant ageofme
whenmymi ndi sawol .
Me:Iam gr at eful Cha, thankyou.ButIcan' t
,wecan' tgodownt hatr oad.Comi ngbackwontbe
easy.
Her :Yandi saIdon' twantt ocomeback, Iwantt obeyour sandyoumi ne.
Me:Chant ellecan' tyouseewhat 'sonmyf i
nger ?
Ifl
auntmyhandi nherf ace, shet akesi tandki ssesi t.
Me:Chant elle...
Myvoi cewassof tandhusky.
Her :Isitt heonl yt hingst opi ngyou?
Sheat tempt st opul lmyr ingof fasshemassagesmyhand.Isnat chedmyhandback
screami ng;" whoa! "
Me:Ican' tletyout akei tof f,itsnott heonl yt hingst oppingme.What '
sinmyhear tisst opping
me.
Her :What 'si nyourhear t?
Me:LoveChant ell
e, lovet hatIhaveneverf el
t.
Her :Notevenwi thme?
Me:Chawhyar ewer evi sitingt hepast ?Itsbeen9mont hs.
Her :BecauseYandi saIneedanswer s.
Me:Haven' tIgi venyouanswer s?
Her :No.
Me:Okayl etst alkoverl unch.
Her :Idon' twantt ot al koverl unch, Iwantani ghtinyourbed, inyourar ms.
Me:Thatwontgi veyouanswer st owhat everquest i
onsyouhavei nyourmi nd.
Her :Wewi lltal kt henYandi sa.
Me:Youwantt ot alki nmyar ms?
Shenoddedsl owl y.
Me:Thengeti nmyar msandl etst al
k.
Iopenedmyar msf orher .
Her :Nonotr ightnow.
Mci m!
Me:Youj ustmi ssedoutonagr eatoppor tunity.Youwont , Irepeatyouwontspendani ghtin
mybed.
Her :What ever !
Me:What ever ?
Her :Idon' tcar eYandi sa!
Me:Whyar eyoushout ing?
Her :Di dImeananyt hingt oyou?
Me:It hinkIam doneher e.
Igotupandt ookmybel ongi ngs, thatbei ngmyphoneandkeys.
Me:Iam headi ngbackt ot hel odgei fyouneedal i
ftyoubet tercomewi thmenow, Br ianand
Trevel yanwi lltakeovert heof f
ice.Theywi l
lkeepaneyeonever ything.
Shegotupf rom herchai randf ollowedaf t
ermet ot hecar .WegotonandIdr oveusbackt othe
l
odge, int hecarwewer en' ttalkingandIwasn' tbothered.OkayIwasbot her
edal i
ttl
ebutgeez!I
am mar ri
edwhycan' tsheunder standt hat?Il ookedather ,shewasl ooki
ngoutt hewi ndowwi th
herar msi nherchest .Shewasr eallymad.
Me:Okayl etsdot hisnow, whenwegett othel odgengobaangat hiyibhedil
euyi funayo.
Her :FuckyouYandi sa!
Me:Wow!Iam maki ngyouanof f
erandyouswear ingme.
Her :Youj ustdoi ngt hisoutofpi ty.
Me:Chant ellewhatdoyouwantmet odo?
Ipar kedwhenwegott ot hel odget henl ookedather .Whywasshesodamnconf usingal lofa
sudden?
Me:It houghtyouwant edt his.
Her :Yout hi nkIam t ryingt ousesext ogetbackwi thyou?
Ichuckl edandgotof fthecar .Iwentt ohersi deandopenedt hedoorf orherandshest epped
out, sexwast hel astt hi ngonmymi ndr i
ghtnow.
Me:Myr oom?
ShenoddedsoIl ockedt hecarandt ookherhand.Wewal kedt omyr oom handinhand.
.
Whenwegott her eIunl ockedandhel doutt hedoorf orher ,shewal kedi nfi
rstandIf oll
owedi n
afterhercl osi ngt hedoorbehi ndme.
Me:I tshot ,don' tyouwantt ogof oraswi m?
Her:Wi thyou?
Me:Sur e.
Sheshookherhead, oho!HayiIt ookof fmyt -shirtfol l
owedbymyshoesandsockst henIgot
ont hebed.
Me:Ar eyougoi ngt ost andt her e?
Sheputherbagdownt henwal kedt owar dst hebedandsatdownont heedgeoft hebed.
Me:Youl ookuncomf or table.
Her:Ner vous.
Me:Why?I tsnotl i
kewegoi ngt odoanyt hi ng, yiza.
Itookherhandandpul l
edhert ome.
Her:Wai tIhavet ot akeof fmyshoes.
Shequi cklyt ookof fhershoesandsl eptnextt ome, Iputmyar m overherandpul ledhert ome.
Me:Thi siswhatyouwantr ight ?Agoodcuddl e.
Shel ookedatmewi tht ear si nhereyes.
Me:Heywhyar eyoucr ying?
Shesi ghedaf annedherf acewi t hherr i
ghthand, sheal waysdi dt hattohol dbackt ear
s.The
wayChant el l
ecr i
edt hesedays, goshshewassl owl yt urningi ntoPhumza.
Her:Itf eelsgoodbei ngher e, wi thyou, inyourar ms.
Me:Feel sgoodhavi ngyouher e...Imean. ..
Ididn'tmeant osayt hatbutIguessmyhear twasspeaki ngher e,itfeltgoodbei ngher ewi thher
l
iket his.Ihavebeenr unni ngawayf rom t hisf orawhi lenow, IguessIcoul dn'trunanymor e.
Her:Yandi sa
Shehel dt hesi deofmyf aceandki ssedmyl ipsgent ly,slowl y.Herki ssstil
ldidwonder stome
gosh!Suchaf ami liarpl aceshet akesmet o, allthosef eelingsIt houghtwer enomor ecame
rushingbacki ntomyhear t,oht hegoodt imes!Myhandsl owl ygoesdownt oherassandr est
there.
Me:OhmyGodChant elle.
Her:Iam sor r ybutImi ssedt his.
Ipeckherl i
ps.
Me:Idon' twantt ohur tyouagai n,Idon' twantt ohur tPhumzaei ther.Ifwedot hisyou'llbehur t,
thebot hofyou.Ican' tbearput tingyout hroughpai nagai n.
Shecar essedmyf ace, runni ngheri ndexf ingeracr ossmyl i
ps.
Her:Wecankeepi tbet weenus, Ijustmi ssyouYandi sa.It sjustaki ss.
Me:I twontbej ustaki ssChaandwebot hknowi t.YouandI ..
Cha
Sheki ssedmyl i
psagai n, gent l
yj ustt hewaysheknewIl ikedi tmaki ngmymanhoodst if
fen.I
sweari fshekeepski ssi ngmel i
ket hatI '
llf uckher !
Her:Iwantyou, Imi ssyou, Ineedyou.Il oveyou.
Shewhi sper edbet weenki sses.
Me:Doyouhavecondoms?
Her:Inmybag.
Ichuckl edandpushedherbackgent lyandhel dherchi n,car essingi t.
Me:Youwer epr epar edf ort hi s.
Her:Iwashopi ngwewoul dgot hatf ar.
Ishookmyheadandki ssedherneckt henl ips, myt onguei nhermout h.Sheknewwhatt odo
withi t
,sher espondedi mmedi atel ytwi stinghert onguear oundmi ne.Ibr oket hekissandl ooked
ather ,shel ookedsobeaut iful andi nnocentasshest aredi ntomyeyes.
Me:Justpr omi semet hataf tert hiswewi llgooursepar ateways, nomor elookingback.
Her:Ican' tpr omi seyout hatasl ongaswest illhere, awayf r
om yourwi fe.Wecant ake
advant ageofeachot her .
Me:Mywi fe!
Ipushherandsi tup.
Her:Yourwi f e?
Me:Idon' twantt ohur ther .
Shecar essedmyf aceandpl ant edasof tpeckonmyl i
ps.
Her:Shewontf i
ndout .
Me:Imadeapr omi set oherCha.
Shel i
mpedovermeandsatonmyl apput tingherar msar oundmyneck.
Her:I tsfinewedon' thavet o.
Ismi ledr emember ingt hef irsttime, daywedi dt hi s.WhenIt ookheri nnocence, Isai dthose
exactwor dsandt odayshei susi ngt hem onme.
Me:Thanksnowwi l
lyougetof fme?
Sheshookherheadandt ookof fhert op, followedbyherbr ar eveali
ngherst i
llfi
rm andsexy
breast s.Isi ghed.
Me:Chant el l
e. ..Idon' twantt ohur tyouagai n.
Her:6year sagoyout ookmyvi rgini t
y, myi nnocence.Rememberhowsweetmaki ngl ovetome
was?Howi nlovewewer e?Whatwentwr ongYandi sa?
Ipushedhergent l
ysoshecoul df allonherbackt hengotbet weenherl egsandki ssedherneck
allthewaydownt ot hespacebet weenherbr east s,st artingwi t
hherl ef
tbr eastIgent lysucked
oni t.Playi ngwi thhernowhar dni ppl ewi thmyt ongue, shemoanedsosweet l
yandsof tl
y.
Me:Icoul dn' tgoagai nstdad' swor danymor e.
IsayasIki sst het attooj ustaboveherl ef tbr east , mynamei ncur si
vewr iti
ng.Wegotmat ching
tatt
oosacoupl eofyear sback, comet ot hinkIl ovedher ,Ireallydid.
Her:Wasn' tIwor thf ight ingf or?
Me:Iwast iredoff i
ght i
ngCha, thebeefbet weenourf ather s..
Her:Wecoul dhaveendedi t.
Me:I twasn' tthateasyandyouknowi t.
Ilookedathert hengotof fherandl ookedatmyl ef thand.Shesatupandki ssedmychest
sinceIwasst illkneel ingbet weenherl egs.
Me:Wai t
...
HereyespoppedoutasIsl owl ysl ippedof fmyr ing, Igotof fthebedandopenedt hedr aweron
mysi det abl e.Iputt her ingt her ethencl osedt hedr awer ,
Iwentt ogetherbagandempt i
edi t
.I
foundt woboxesofcondomst henwentbackt oher , Ipul l
edherbyherl egst otheedgeoft he
bed.
Me:Loveorsex?
Her:Love, makel ovet omel ikeneverbef ore.
Me:OhCha. .
Her:IwantyouandIknowyouwantmet oo.
Me:Nodoubtabout , Iwoul dl ovet odot hi sbutcomi ngbackandbr eakingoutofi twontbeeasy.
Ther ear esomanyunr esol vedf eelingst her e, Idon' tknowi fIwantt ogot her e.
Her:Soar eyousayi ngt hatyoul oveme?
Ithrewt hepacksont hebedandbentdownandunbut tonedherj eanst henpul l
eddownt he
zipper .
Me:Lovel iket heoneweshar eddoesn' tjustdi sappearandIam notsur et hatIwantt oawaken
them henceIhavebeeni gnor ingandavoi dingyou.Ist illcraveyourbodynextt omi ne,Istil
l
l
oveyou.
Her:Butyoul ovehermor e?
Ishookmyhead.
Me:I ft herewasawayt obewi t
ht hebot hofyouwi thouthur t
inganyoneofyouGodknowsI
woul dj umpatt hatoppor t
uni t
y, Iwoul dtryt omakei twor k.
Her:SoImat tert oyou?
Me:Somucht hatIam scar edofbei ngnextt oyou.
Her:Younotl yingt ome?
Ipul l
edherj eansdownandsheki ckedt hem of f
.
Me:Ihavel iedt oyoui nt hepastbutIguessnotnowormaybei t
sbecauseyoul yingnakedi n
mybed.
Shesmi l
edshyl yasIr eachedf orherpant yandpul ledi tdown, againsheki ckedi tof f.Sweet
mot herof !Webackher eagai n..Ipul leddownmypant s, foll
owedbymyboxer st henst epped
outoft hem.Fuck!
Her:If orgothowhugeyouar e.
Ismi ledandki ssedherr i
ghtl eg, from herbi gt oeal lthewayupt oherthigh.
Me:Youshaki ng.
Her :OhYandi sa, feelsl i
ket hef irstt ime.
Ismi l
edatt hememor yasi tfl
ashedi nmymi ndandpushedherl egsapar tsoIcoul dbe
bet weent hem kneel ingbet weenher .Ibentandki ssedherl ipsthenr eachedf ort hepackof
condomst hatwer eaboveherhead.Iopenedt heboxandkneel edupst raightandpul ledoutt he
condomst henr ippedi topen.Iki ssedherkneeasIr ol ledt hecondom ont omymanhoodt hen
pushedherl egsf urtherapar t.
Me:Whenwast hel astt i
meyoudi dt his?
Her :Whenwast hel astt imewehadsex?
Ibentovert oki ssherbel l
ybut tonal lt hewayupt oherr i
ghtbr eastthenneck, chi nt henl i
ps.I
posi ti
onedmysel fandhel dherwai stsoshewoul dn' tmoveupasIt hrustin, shemoaned
throught heki ssasIf orcedmywayi nt ohert ightf airy.
Me:Fuckyout i
ght .
Her :Ihaven' tdonet hisi naver yl ongt ime.
Ismi l
edandpeckedherl i
pst henst ar tedmovi ngi nandout ,sidetosi decirculat ingt ost ret
ched
hert ight...sl owl y.Asmypacepi ckedupi thi tmeIl oveher ,IknowIdo.It ookherhandand
kissedt hebackofi tal lthewayupt ohershoul der ,shemoanedsof tly.Ipulledhert owar dsme
soherasswasupi nt heai r
,meet ingmehavewayasIt hrusti ndeeperandf ast er."ohYandi sa"
,
shemoaned.Ihel dherwai stonei thersi deandpul l
edherr oughly,shecr i
edoutl oudasshe
slammedt owar dsme." Goodgr aci ousmeCha" .Istret chedoutmyl egsandsl eptonmyback,
pullinghet ome.Weshar edaki sst hensher odeme, Icoul dn'thelpbutmoanandgr oanasI
feltwar mf luidscomi ngf rom her .Ihel dherwai standpul l
edherupanddownr eal l
yf astwhi l
e
meet i
ngherhal fwayandf i
nallyIexpl odedont hecondom, thankGodf orthat .Shecol l
apsed
ont opofme, ki
ssi ngmychestsher est edherheadont hesamespot .
Her :Don' tletmegoYandi sa.
Iwr appedmyar msar oundherandki ssedherf orehead.Iam i ndeepshi t!Myphoner an
fri
ght eningus.Shequi cklygotof fme, Igotof ft hebedandt ookmypant s.Reachedf orthe
pocketandt ooki tout' Phumza' , Jesus!Il ookedatChant ell
et henatt hephone, Fuckme!Iputi t
ont hebedt hent ookof fthecondom andt hrewi tint hebi n.
Me:It hinkyouhavet ogo.
Iopenedt hedr awerandt ookoutmyr ing, Islippedi tbackonmyf i
nger .
Me:Chant elleyouneedt ogo, please.
Her :Real l
yYandi sa?
Me:Ineedt ot alkt omywi fe,Iwi llseeyoul ater .I'
l
l cal lyou.
Her :Iam notgoi ngt ot ryt ogetbet weent het woofyou.
Me:Thanks.
Shegotof ft hebedandpi ckeduphercl othes.Shet ookmygownandwor eitt henwal kedout ,
herr oom wasn' tt hatf arsoshewasgoi ngt obeokay.It ookmyphoneasi tr angagai n.
.
Me:Myl ove, isever yt hingokay?
Her :Heybabeandno, Imi ssyou.
Irubbedmyf orehead.
Me:Imi ssyout oomyl ove.
Her :Ar eyoubusy?
Me:Was. ..
Her :OhokaybecauseIr eallywantt ot alkt oyou.
Me:About ?
Her :Not hing, Imi sshear i
ngyourvoi ce.
Me:Imi ssyout ooandIl oveyou, somuch.
Her :Iloveyout oo.
Me:BabecanIcal lyoul ater?Pl ease.
Her :Itsokay, enj oyt her estofyourday.
Me:Yout oomyl oveandki sstheboysf orme.
Her :Wi l
ldo, okaygetbackt owor k.
Ichuckl edandputt hephonedownt henIt hrewmysel font hebed.Di dIreallyj ustr evisitmy
pastwi thChant elle?
54
Phumza:
Ismi l
edandputmyphonei nmygownpockett henl ookedatourboys, ohYandi satheloveI
havef oryou, oursonsar ef ullpr oofofi t
.
Me:Daddymi ssesyou, hesayst oki ssyouf orhi m.
Ibentt oki sst hem onebyone.
Me:Mom anddadl oveyousomuch.
"Sodoesuncl e", Ili
ft
edmyeyesf r
om Nkosana.Andt heymetwi thLubanzi '
seyes, Ismiledand
weshar edaqui ckhug.
Me:Whatar eyoudoi ngher e?
Him:It houghtIshoul dcomeseet heboysandIbr oughtyousomet hingt oeat ,youalways
compl ai ningaboutt hehospi talf ood.
Me:Oht hanksi phipho?
Him:Il efti tinyourr oom.
Me:Thankyou, shallwe?Iam st arving.
Wemadeourwayoutoft heNI CU.
Him:Sowhenl astdi dyouspeakt odaddyYandi sa?
Me:Ri ghtnow, comet ot hinkofi t.Hedi dn'tsoundl i
kehi msel f
,itwasal mostl ikehecoul dn't
waittodr opt hecal lonme.
Him:Hei spr obabl yonsi teandbusy.
Me:Yeaht hat '
swhatIt hinkt oo.
AssoonasIgotont hebedhegavemeabr ownpaperbagf rom Wi mpy, Ismi l
edandt hanked
him.
Him:Anyt ime.
Hesmi ledasIopenedi t.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Aftershower i
ngIgotdr essedi nbl ackpant s,blackt -shirtandbl ackPhumasneaker s.Ibrushed
myhai rt hent ookmyphoneandwal l
etandheadedoutt hedoor .Iwant edt ogetawayf rom this
placef orawhi le, Ineededt ot hinkandpr ocesswhatj usthappenedbet weenmeandChant el
le.
Ineededspacet oconf rontt hesef eelingsIt houghtIhadf orher .Igoti nthecarandst artedthe
enginet hendr oveout ,Idi dn' tknowwher eIwasgoi ngr eal l
y.AllIknewwast hatIneededa
breakf r om t hel odge, itwasget tingt ooheat edf orme.AndIneededt ot hink.
.
Ther ayf rom t hesunst rokemyeyes, wakingmeup.Ist retchedandyawnedt hengotof fthe
bedr ubbi ngmyeyes.Iwal kedi nt ot hebat hroom andhadaqui ckshowert hengotr eadyf or
wor k,ourcl i
ent swer ecomi ngf orani nspectiont odaysoIhadt obeonsi tet owelcomeand
answert oquest ionsi ftheyhadany.Anywayaf terget ti
ngdr essedIt ookmycarkeys, wal l
et
andphonet henheadedoutt hedoor .Chant ellestoodatt heot hersi deoft hedoorwi t
hmygown
i
nherhands, It hinkshewasaboutt oknockwhenIopenedbecauseshehadherhandi nt heair.
Sheputi tdownandl ookedupatme.
Her:Hi
Me:Hi
Shehandedt hegownt ome, Itooki tandt hrewi tinmyr oom t henl ocked.Andt ur
nedtof ace
herdi rect ion.
Me:Iwasonmywayt osi te.
Her:CanIcat chal if
twi thyou?Mandl awi l
lbegoi ngi nl ate.
Me:Can' tyouasksomeoneel se?
Shel ookedatmef orawhi lewi thoutsayi nganyt hi ng, shewasst i
llthinki
ngmaybe.
Her:Ar eyoumadatme?
Me:Whywoul dIbemadatyou?
Sheshr ugged.
Her:Youknow, whathappenedyest erday.Youbl amemef or,youknowsl eepingwi t
hme.
Me:Ihavecl ient st oat tendt oandi fyoust illl
oveyourj obyoubet terheadt her easwel l
.Ask
someoneel sef oral iftbecausemycari sof fli
mi tsokay?
Ididn' twantt ot alkaboutt his, Idi dn'twantt ot alkaboutyest erdayt hi
sear l
yint hemor ning.
Her :If orgothowmuchofacol dhear tedbast ardyoucanbe.
Irolledmyeyesatherandpushedheroutofmyway.
Me:Ineedt ogett owor kandyoubusyst andi ngher ebl ocki ngmyway!
Iwal kedawayf urious, notatherbutatmysel f.Ijustmanagedt ocompl icatemyuncompl i
cat ed
l
ifebysl eepi ngwi thsomeonewhocl earlyhasf eel i
ngf orme, andIf orher .Iunl ockedt hedoor s
ofmycarandgoti nt henst ar t
edt heengi neanddr oveout .Idon' tknowwhyIhadt oallow
mysel ftogodownt hatr oadwi thheragai n, asmuchasIwoul dl ovetodoshi twi t
hherI
coul dn't.Weser iousl yhadt ocutal lti
es, Icoul dn'tbeart het houghtofPhumif indi ngoutabout
yest erday.I twoul dbr eakher ,itwoul dbreakus.Icoul dn'tlosemyki ds.
.
Igott ositeandpar kedt hengotof f.Ourcl ientswer ealreadyonsi t
etalkingt ot he
builder s/cont ract or s,theysmi ledwhent heysawmeappr oacht hem.Iapol ogizedf orbei ngl ate
thent ookt hem onal ittl
et our ,
t heywer er eallypl easedwi tht hepr ogresswemadeont he
projectandt hatwasmusi ct omyear s.Cl ear lytheydi dn'tmaket hewr ongchoi ceabout
choosi ngusast hebestcandi dat esf orthej ob.Af terourl ittl
et ourIwal kedt hem t othei rcars
thenmetwi tht het eam i nt hesi teof fi
ce, theywer eallther ebesi desMandl aandChant el l
e.I
didn'tr eall
yneedMandl aint hemeet i
ngbecausehi swor kwasdonef ornow, Igavet hem t he
feedbackf rom t heowner soft hepr oject.Theyr ai sedaf ewconcer nssoaf ewt hingshadt obe
changed, i
twasnot hingmaj ort houghaf tert hatIl etthem getbackt owor k.
.
Chant ell
eandMandl acamei nhal fwayt hrought heday( @14: 30)car ryingat akeaway, wel l
Mandl awas.Iaskedhi mt obr ingmel unchsowhenheputt hef ooddownont het ableIgave
himt hemoneyheusedt obuyi tf orme.
Him:Gooddoi ngbusi nesswi thyou.
Me:Thanksbud.
Hesatdownont het ablesi nceChant ell
et ookt hechai r
.
Him:Idi dn' tseeyouyest erday.
IlookedatChant eller eallyhopi ngt hatshedi dn' ttellMandl aaboutyest erday,shel ookedaway.
Itookmyt ookmyt akeawayandopenedi tt hendugi nwi thmyeyesgl uedonher ,shecoul dn't
evenl ookatme.OhmyGodshet oldhi m!
Me:Iwentsi ghtvi ewi ng, thispl acei sreal l
ybeaut i
ful.
Him:I tisman.
Me:Wher ewer eyou?
Him:I nmyr oom, Iwashungover !
Me:Thatwi llteachyout odr inkr esponsi bl y.
Him:Yeahyeah!Chant elleandIwer ethinki ngofgoi nghomet hi
sweekend.Imi ssmygi r
land
mom.Andsheobvi ouslymi ssesherson.
Inodded.
Me:Iam sur et heywi l
lbepl easedt oseeyou, IknowOl wet huwi ll.
Him:Eyshei st hemai nr easonIam goi nghome, shehasbeencal l
ingt ocompl ain.Ut hiIdon' t
mi ssher .
Me:Shei smybabysi ssoIpr ef ernotdi scussi ngyourr elationshi p.
Him:Mxm!Letmecheckont heguys.
Hegotupandwal kedout ,l
eavi ngmeandChant ellealone.Shegotupt ooandheadedf orthe
door .
Me:Cha
Shest oppeddeadandt ur nedt ol ookatme.Shehadf ullonat tit
udeonherf ace, that'
sonet hing
Ididn' tmi ssabouther .Herat t
itude, shewas/ i
sl oud, rudeevenandst raightupr aw.Igotup
andwal kedt owar dsher .
Her :Don' tapol ogise.
Me:Iwasar ealasst hi smor ning, Iam sor ry.
Her :Youdon' tevenmeant hat .
Me:Ido.
Her :Mci m!Youwantt oknowi fIt ol dyourf riend?
Me:Di dyou?
Shel ookedatmef rom headt ot oet hent urnedherbackt ome, Ipul ledherbackbyherel bow.
Shet ur nedwi t
hasur pr ise, shegavemeahotsl apacr ossmyf ace.
Her :WhatYandi sa? !What ?!Forsomeonewhosai dhel ovesmeyoucanr eallyhur tmyf eelings!
Me:Isai dsor r
y.
Her :Idon' tknowwhyyoubot heryour sel fandIdon' tknowwhyIbot hermysel feither !Youar e
suchanass!
Me:Don' tshouti nmyf aceChant elleanddon' teverputyourhandsonmeeveragai n.
Shesl appedmeagai n.Icoul dn'thol dback, myadr enal inewasr isingandIsl appedt heshi tout
ofher .Shescr eamedandhel dhercheekwi t
hbot hherhands, shel ookedatmei nhor r
orand
tearsf ellf rom hereyesi mmedi at ely.
Me:OhmyGod, Iam sor ry.
Her :Don' tt ouchme! !
Shesl appedmyhandsandwi pedhert ear sthenl ip, IthinkIbur sti t.Ididn' tmeant odot hat .
"What '
sgoi ngon? !",Mandl aaskedasher ushedi nt hedoor .
Him:Ihear dscr eami ng.
Me:Iam sor ryCha.
Her :Don' tt ouchmeYandi sa!
Him:Whatdi dyoudo?
Me:Pl easeexcuseus, pl ease.
Ipushedhi m outandcl osedt hedoort henl ocked.Andt ur nedt oChant ell
ewhowasst il
l
standingi nt hesamespot .
Me:Iam sor ry, Idon' tknowwhatcameoverme.Iam r eal lysor ry.
Her :Yousl appedmeYandi sa.
Me:Iam sor ry.
Iwr appedmyar msar oundherandki ssedherf orehead.Iwas/ am nowomanbeat er ,Idon' t
knowwhatcameoverme.Idon' tknowwhatanger edmesomuch.Iunwr appedt hem agai nand
l
ookedather ,li
ft i
ngherchi nup.Iwi pedherst il
l f
alli
ngt ear sandki ssedherl ips,mur mur ing" I
am sor ry" .Movi ngt oherneckt henIl if
tedherupandl aidheront het ablei ntheof fice, clearing
i
t.
Me:Iam sor ryCha.
Iunbut tonedherj eansandpul l
edt hezi pperdown.It ookof fhershoes, followedbyherj eans
andpant ies.Iopenedherl egsandki ssedherdownt her e, shel etoutasof tmoanasIsucked
andst ucki nmyt onguei nher ."Yandi sa", shecal l
edouti namoan.Ist oppedandl ookedather ,
hereyeswer ecl osedandhermout hwasopen.Iki ssedherl eftthi ght hendownt her eagai ntil
l
shecame.Igotupandnot icedasmi l
eonherf acebutshest i
llhadt ear sinhereyes.
Me:Iam sor ryf orever ythi ngIputyout hr ough, Iam sor ryf orslappi ngyou.
Itookherhandsandpul ledherof fthet abl e,shewor ehercl ot
hesi mmedi atelyaft erput t
ingher
feetont hegr ound.ThenIpul l
edhert omeandwi pedhert ears.
Me:Youdon' tdeser veal loft his, youar ebeaut i
fulCha.Youhaveabeaut ifulsmi l
e, onet hatI
wishyouwoul dwearal lt het ime.Iam aj er k,Idon' tdeser veyourl oveorPhumza' sf orthat
mat ter.Al lIeverdoi shur tt hepeopl eIlove.Youshoul dmoveonwi thyourl i
feandf orgetabout
meokay?
Ikissedherf oreheadandhuggedherr eal lytight .
Me:Iam sosor ry, I'
lltakeyoubackt othel odge.
Shebr ushedmeof fandst eppedawayf r om me.
Her :Iam f ine, I
'lllive.
Me:Iam sor ry.
Shet ouchedherl owerl ipt henr eachedf orherbag, shet ookoutami rr
ororwhat everi twasand
l
ookedather self .Hercheekwasr edwi thmyf inger svi sible.
Her :Whatki ndofsi ckbast ardar eyou?
Me:Idi dn' tmeant oCha, Iam sor ry.Iwi shIcoul dsayi tinyourhomel anguagej ustt oshow
youhowsor ryIam, Idi dn' tmeant o.YouknowIwoul dneverhi tawoman.
Her :Butyousl appedme!
Me:Iam sor ry.Iam sor r yChant el le.
Sheputherhandupshut ti
ngmeup.
Her :Stoppr etendi ngl i
keyousor rybecauseyounot !Iwi sht hatIcoul dsayIhat eyouandmean
i
tbecauseIr eallywantt ohat eyour ightnow.
Me:Ndi yaxol isaChant elleAdams.
Her :Yout hi nksayi ngi tinXhosameansyoumeani t?
Me:Hayi keIgi veup, Iam notapol ogi zinganymor ebecauseyoudon' twantt oheari t.
Her :Fine!
Me:Fi ne!
Itookmykeysandphonet henunl ockedt hedoor .
Her :Yeahr un!Li keyoual waysdo!
Me:Ohf uckChant ell
eman!Whatdoyouwantmet odohuh?Ihavebeenapol ogi
zingt oyoufor
thepastIdon' tknowhowmanymi nut esandyouwer en'thearinganyofi t
, youpr acticall
ytold
met ofuckof f.Iam doi ngt hatnowngokuut hiIam r unni ngaway?Iam notr unningaway, Iam
givingyouspacet ocal m down.
Shet ookherbag.
Her :Ican' tstayher ewi thyourf ivef i
nger s.
Me:Iam sor r
y.
Her :What everj usttakemebackt ot hel odge.
Shesai dopeni ngt hedoorandwewal kedout .
Me:Youar esuchadr amaqueenkodwaChant elle.
Her :Dramaqueen?Yousl appedmewi t
ht hebackofyourhand.
Me:Howmanyt i
mesdoyouwantmet oapol ogise?
Her :Zer otimesshutup.
Mandl aj oggedt ousandcaughtupwi thusbef orewegoti nthecar.
Him:Whoa!Whatt hef uck? !
Me:Justcal m downwi l
lyou?
Ididn'twanthi mt odr awat tentiont ous, goshIcoul dl osemyj obovert his.Ij ustslappedmy
colleagueandi thappenst obeawoman.
Her :Iam f ineMandl ai tdoesn' thur tokay?
Him:Youhi ttinghernow?Lookatyou, jeezYandi sa!
Her :Hedi dn' tmeant o.
Him:Youdef endi nghi m?
Me:Ar eyoubei ngser ious?Idi dn' tmeant odot his.
Him:Thenwhydi dyou?
Me:Shewassl appi ngme, Igotpi ssedandIam sor ry...
Him:Wow!Yandi samf ethut hatdoesn' tgiveyout her i
ghtt ohitherli
ket his.
Me:Idi dn'tmeant ookay?Ir egreti tdudepl easedon' tdot his,Ialr
eadyf eelbad.
Him:Youar eanassdoyouknowt hat ?
Her :Iwantt ogogetar estal ready.
Him:Don' tputyourhandsonhermandude, youcan' tdot his.
Me:Iam sor r
yokay?Youknowt hatIam nowomanbeat er.
Hel ookedatChant elle.
Him:You' llbeokay?
Her :Yeahdon' twor ryaboutmeIam good.
Henoddedandki ssedherf oreheadt henopenedt hedoorf orher.Shegoti nandcl osed,he
turnedt ome.
Him:Touchanot herhai ronherheadandIwi llkillyou, Iam ser i
ousIwi l
lshootyou.
Me:Fut sekman!Justl ookaf tert hesepeopl e.
Him:Fut seknawe!I 'l
ldoso.
Me:Sur e.
Weshoul derbumpedt henIwentt ogetonmysi deanddr oveust othelodge.Whenwegot
therewewentoursepar ateways, Iwentt omyr oom andsodi dshe.WhenIgott hereIthrew
mysel font hebedsi ghedl oudl y, Iwi shdadwasher ebecauseIr eal
lywant edt otalktohi m.He
woul dt ellmewhatt odor i
ghtnow.
.
IwokeupwhenIhear daknockont hedoor ,Igotof ft hebedandgott hedoor .
Me:Mandl a
Him:Shol etsgof ordi nner ,thet eam i swai t
ing.
Me:IsChant ellet her e?
Him:Youwor riedt hatt heywi llseeyourf i
vef i
nger s?Nahshei sn'
tther
e.
Me:Issheokay?
Him:Youknowi fshei sn' tokayshewontopent hedoorf oranyone.
Me:Soyouhaven' tseenorspokent oher ?
Him:Nahbutshewi lltalkt omewhenshei sready.
Me:I'l
l passdi nner ,I'llgoseeher .
Him:Whathappened?Icoul dsenset ensionbet weent het woofyou.
Itookmykeyandl ockedt her oom t henpushedMandl a.
Me:Let st al kl ater, apol ogi set oever yonef orme.
Him:Al rightl etmeknowhowshei s.
Me:Shar p.
Iknockedonherdoorandwai tedf orsomet imet i
llsheopened.
Me:Wi llyoul etmei n?
Her:Whatdoyouwant ?
Me:Toseei fyouokay.
Her:Youcanseenj e.
Me:Okaysoyouwontl etmei n?
Her:Forwhat ?Soyoucanmakemecum t hentellmet oletyougoagai n?Fuckyou.
Ichuckl ed.
Me:Iam nother et omakeyoucum buti fyouokayt henI 'lll
etyoube.Iam reall
ysor r
y.
Her:Okay.St illwantt ocomei n?
Me:Nahr at hernotl et sgoj oint heot hersf ordinner .
Her:Iam noti nt hemoodf oracr owd.
Me:Meei thersol et sor deri nandhavedi nnertoget her .
Shest eppedasi de, Iwal kedi nandsatont hecouch.
Her:Whatdoyouwantt oeat ?
Me:Anyt hi ng.
Shenoddedandcal ledr oom ser vice, afterthatshej oinedmeont hecouch.Shesatacr ossme
andlookedatme.
Her:Howi syourwi fe?
Me:Shei sokayt hanksf oraski ng.
Shenodded.
Me:Iam r eallysor ry.
Againshenodded.
Her:Youal readyapol ogi sedear lierinaver ysexyway.
Ichuckl ed.
Me:Asexywayhuh?Youal waysl ikedi tifIapologi sedt hatway.
Her:Tel lmehowdoyouexpectmet ogetoveryouwhenyouknowmeandunder standmeso
well?
Me:Gi vesomeoneel seachancet ogett oknowyou.
Her:Itwi lltakef or ever .
Me:You' l
lbesur prised. ..Mandl awaswor riedaboutyou.
Her:Hehasnor easont obe.
Aknockedsomet hr ought hedoor ,shegotupandat tendedt oit.I
twasourf ood,shetippedthe
guythencl osedt hedoor .Sheser vedmet hensatdownwi t
hherfood.
Her:Iam f iner eally.CanIgohomet omor row?Pl ease.
Me:Whenwi llyoucomeback?
Her:Sunday.
Inodded.
Her:Thanks.
Me:Itst hel eastIcandoaf terall theemot i
onalroller coasterIputyout hr
ough.
Her:Yeahyeaht hankst hough.
Inoddedt henweat ei nsi lenceaf tereat ingIputmypl ateont hetableandgotup.
Me:Ishoul dgetgoi ng, sendmyl ovet oQhawe.
Her:Pleasespendt heni ght .
Me:NoChanotaf terwhathappenedyest erday.
Her:Sowhat
Me:ChaImeanti
everyousai
tbutt hereie than I can offer
dyesterdayyoudi
snowayofbei
dn'tmeananyofi
ngwi tht wopeopl
t?
eatt hesamet i
me.AndIam
prettysureyoudon' twantt obemysi dechi ck, youdeser vebet ter
.Youdeser vet obe
someone' snumber1.Youdeser vemor ethanIcanof f
eryou.
Her:Youl ovehermor
Me:Icanneverl
e?
oveanyonemoryou Cha, I love th
et hanyouCha, Ilovet hebot hofyoui ndi f
ferentways.Idon' t
l
oveanyonemor
willalwaysbeher
et
ef
hant
oryoui an only be with o
heotherbutIcanonl
fyouneedmet
ybewi
hough.
thoneper sonandt hatper soni sn'tyou.I

Shel
kneel
ookeddownandr
edi nf rontofherandhel me though.
ubbedherf or eheadwi
dhershoul der
t
s.
hherl efthandt henf annedherf ace.OhGod!I

Me:Pl
toget
easedon'
her,abeaut
tcr
if
y,pl
ulandst read with her left h
ease.IloveyouCha,
ongonebuti
youar
tendst
et
her
hemot
ewecan'
herofmychi
tber omant i
ld,
cal
weshar
lyinvol
eahi st
ved.Iam
or
y

sorryifImi sledyou.Ideepl yapol ogise.

Sheputherar msar oundmyneckandhuggedmer eallyti
ght.
Her:Pl easedon' tt ellmet hatthisisgoodbye.
Me:Iam sor ry.
Her:ButIl oveyou.
Me:AndIl oveyout oobutIam mar riedtosomeoneel se.
Igotupwi thherbecauseshewashol di
ngr eallyt i
ghtont ome, Iwr appedmyar msar oundher
waist.
Her:Makel ovet omeYandi sa.
Ili
ftedherupandshewr appedherl egsar oundmywai st
.Iwal kedovert othebedandl ai
dher
ont hebedt hengotbet weenherl egs.
Me:Takeal lthet imeyouneedbackathome, Icanmanagewi t
houtyou.
Shenodded.Ipeckedherl i
pst henki ssedherf or eheadandgotof fher.
Me:ByeChant el
le.
Her:Youl eavi ng?
Me:Whenweseeeachot heragai nyou' l
lfeel better ,thinkaboutever yt
hingIsai d.Thinkabout
movi ngonyounoti nyourr i
ghtsensesr i
ghtnow.
Isighedoutl oudl yt henwal kedout .Iwentf orawal kar oundt helodgej ustt oocl earmyhead
yetagai n,Iendedupatt hebarhavi ngonebeeraf teranot her.

55
Yandi sa:
>>>2mont hslat er..
.
ItwasahotFr idaymor ni
ngwehadj ustfi
nisheddoi ngthetouchupsi nourproject
,af
ter4
mont hsofsweatandhar dwor kitwasf i
nall
ycompl et
e.Thebui l
dingwasst andinganditl
ooked
wow.Ourwor kwasi mpressive, i
twasout st
andi ng.Wewer eimpr essedourselves.
Me:It hinkwegoti t.
Mandl a:Yout hink?Wedi di t!
Trev:Wepul l
edi tof f!
Me:Andyouknowwhatt hatmeans.
Brian:Celebrationt ime!
Me:Andt hattoo, weget t
ingpai d!
Mandl a:Iam tal kingaboutbi gmoney!
Me:Nowwecanal lpatourbacksal lthewayt othebar !
Wel aughed.
Me:Goodj obguys, wealldi dit.
Noxol o:Letsmeetatt hebar .
Me:Wewi l
lmeetyout herewear estil
lwaiti
ngf orthebigpeople.
Theynoddedandwal kedt ot hei
rcars.Mandl aandIt ookat ouraroundt hepl
ace.
Me:I ttooklongert hanwet houghtitwouldt aket ocompletethisbuildi
ng.
Mandl a:Chant ellewoul dbesoexci t
ed, t
hiswasherf i
rsteverprojectanditwasamaj orone.
Ilookedathi m.
Me:Youmi ssher ?
Hi m:Iam wor riedabouther ,itsunl ikehert odot his.
Me:It akei tshehasn' tmadecont act .
Ihaven' tseenorhear df r om Chant ellesi ncet heni ghtIl eftheri nherr oom, shel eftthe
followi ngmor ningwi thoutsayi nggoodbyet oanyone, whenIt ri
edt ocal lherherphonewasof f
whi chIf oundodd.Chant elleneverkeptherphoneof fforsol ongbutt henagai nIt houghtshe
changednumber s, andmaybeshedi dn'twantt ot alkt ome.Maybet hiswaspar tofher
heal ing/ movi ngonpr ocess.
Hi m:Herphonei sof fbr oandi thasbeenof fsi nceshe" wenthome" .
Me:Maybeshechangednumber s, maybeshedoesn' twantt ot alkt ous.
Hi m:Why?Doessheknowt hatwe. ..youknowherf at her ?
Me:NoIt hinki thast odowi t hme.Maybeshedoesn' twantyout ohavehernumberj usti ncase
yougi vei tt ome.Shedoesn' twantt ohearf rom me.
Hi m:That 'sunl ikeher , shewoul dn' tdot hat .Shehasn' tevenpost edi nhersoci alnet wor ksand
youknowshei saver ysoci al per son, shecan' tst ayawayf rom t hem.
Me:ButIam sur eshei sf ine.
Hi m:Shei sn' tfineYandi sacan' tyouf eelit?
Me:Ican' tt hinkt hewor st ,shei sathomedoi ngsomet hingcr azy.Youknowhowshei s.
Hi m:Butshewoul dpostaboutt hatsomet hing.
Me:Idon' tknow, don' tyout hi nkherf ami lywoul dhavecal ledusbynowt of i
ndoutwher et hei
r
daught eri si fshedi dn' tmakei thome?
Hi m:Yeahyour i
ghtIam j ustovert hinkingt hingsbutIj ustwi shshewoul dcal ltosayshei s
fine, thatshegothomesaf el y.
Me:Nowyouhavesomet hi ngt oar gueaboutwhenyouseeeachot her .
Hel aughed.
Hi m:Andshewi l
lbel ike" ohIam notOl wet huyouknowIdon' tanswert oyou" .
Hei mi tat edChant ell
e'svoi ceandaccentsoIl aughed.Shehadt hemostador abl evoiceand
accentt hough.
Me:Shewi l
lbesol oudandr udeabouti t.
Hi m:Foraf ewsecondsandt henshewi llcal m downandl aughagai n.
Me:That '
sChant el l
ef oryou, shecanneverst aymadf orl ong.
Hesmi led.
Hi m:Iam pr obabl yovert hinki ngt hings, maybeshei sdoi ngt hisonpur pose.
Wehear dpeopl et alkingout sidet hebui l
ding.
Me:Comeont heyar eher e.
Wemett hem hal fwayandt ookt hem onat ourar oundt hepl ace, theywer eimpr essedwi t
hour
beaut ifulwor kandt heywer et reat ingusf orbr eakf astt omor rowmor ning.Wecoul dn'
tsaynot
tot hat , aft erourt ourweheadedbackt ot hel odgeandt ot hebar .
.
Mandl a:Wehavebr eakf astwi thourcl ient st omor row.
Me:Theyl oveourwor ksot heyar et reatingust obr eakf astbef orewel eave.
Mandl a:Butf ornowmasi phuzeni !
Theycheer edandIl aughed.Weor der edshot sandbeer sandcel ebrat edourgr eatwor k.Itwas
al i
ttlet ooear lyf orust obedr inki ngbutwedeser vedi taf teral lthathar dwor k.
.
Theal ar m wentof fwaki ngmeupf rom mydeepsl eep, Ist retchedandyawnedt hengotof fbed.
Final ly!Fi nal lyIcoul dgohomet omywi feandki ds, Icoul dn' twai tt oseet hem, Ir eall
ymi ssed
them.It ur nedof ft heal ar mt henwentt ot akeashower , aftershower ingIl oti
onedmybodyand
gotdr essedi nbl ackj eans, whi tet -shi r
tandbl ackJor dansneaker s.Ibr ushedmyhai rthenwent
toloadmybagsi nt hecart henwentt ojoinever yonei nt her estaur ant .Wehadbr eakf ast
toget herwi thourcl i
ent swhower er eall
yhappywi thourwor k.Af terhavi ngbr eakf astitwas
ti
mef orust ohi tt her oad, webi dedever yonef ar ewel lthenwentt ogeti nourcar sanddr ove
backt oCapet own.
>>>
ItwasWednesday14h00whenIdr ovei ntoCapet own-f inally!Ideci dedt ost artatt heshopst o
getagi ftf ormywi feandson( Qhawe)t henheadedhome.
.
.
Phumza:
Iwasi nt heki tchenhummi ngahappymel odyandcooki nglunchf ormyhusband.
Mom:Wooohawusancument ombi .
Ilookedatherandsmi led.
Me:Yandi sai scomi nghomet odayandIam sohappy.
Her:Youdon' tsay, youact ionssayi tall.Thi smar ri
agewasn' tsuchabadi deaaf terall
.
Me:Notatal lmama.Iexpect edt hewor stwhenIcameher ebutt heopposi tehappened, I
mar ri
edanhonestman, whol ovesandappr eciatesme.Her espect smeandourmar r
iage,hei
s
thesweet estmanIhaveevermet .AndIl ovehi m mama, hecompl etesme.Hemakesmewhol e.
Shesmi led.
Her:Iam happyf oryoubaby.
Me:Met oomamaandIcan' twai t. .
.Speakoft hedevi l
!
Ihear dacarpul lupout side, Iqui ckl ylookedoutt hewindow.
Me:Yandi sa!
Mom l aughedasIr anoutt omeetmyhusband.WhenIsawhi m Ijumpedi ntohi sar msandwe
sharedawar m hugwi t
hhi m spi nni ngmear ound.Igi ggledlikea5yearol dwhoj ustf
oundher
favoritet oyt hathasbeenmi ssingf ordays.
Him:Someonemi ssedme.
Me:Nott hatmuch.
Hel aughedandki ssedmyneckmul ti
plet imesmaki ngmegi ggleevenmor eandl ouder.
Him:Icant el
l.
Heputmedownandweshar edasexyki sst hathebr okeaf t
erawhi l
e.
Him:Whatawayt obewel comedbackhome.
Igiggledandhuggedhi m agai n,hesi ghedandki ssedmyf oreheadasheputhi sar msaround
me.
Him:Imi ssedyou.
Me:Imi ssedyout oo.
Him:AndIgotyousomet hing.
Webr oket hehugandt ookoutsomet hingf rom t hepassengerseat ,abunchoff lowersand
shoppi ngbag.
Me:Thesehavebecomemyf avor iteflower s, t
hankyoubabe.
Ipeckedhi slipsandt ookt hel il
iesandshoppi ngbag.Iopenedi tandt ookapeek, l
ookedli
kea
dress.Andf r
om t hecol oursIcoul dt ellthati twasbeaut iful.
Me:I tsbeaut iful
, Iloveit.
Him:AndIl oveyou.
Hel ookeddownatmeandki ssedmyl ips, j
ustasof tpeck.
Him:I tst imet oseemyboysnow, wher ear et hey?
Me:I nsi desl eeping.
Theyonl ycamehomeonSat ur dayandt heirf atherwasont her oadcomi ngbackhomet ous.
Theywer eheal t
hybutwest il
lhavet obecar ef ular oundt hem, DrMat hews( theirnewdoct or)
saidt heyar est i
llvulnerable.
Him:I 'l
l fetcht hebagsl ater.
Me:Babepl easet akeashowerbef or egoi ngt oseet hem.
Doct orsor ders,wehadt okeepacl eanandheal t
hyhygi enicenvi ronmentf orthem.
Him:Of cosbabeIwoul dn'triski nf ectingt hem wi thwhat evergemsIgotoutt her e.
Heputhi sar m ar oundmywai stthenwewenti nside.Mom wasi nt hekitchenr emovi ngmy
potsf rom t hest ovesoYandigr eet edher .
Her:Someonei sver yhappyt oseeyou.
Hechuckl edandki ssedthesi deofmyhead.
Him:Iam happyt oseehert oo.
Mom smi l
edatus.
Him:Letmegohaveashowert henIcangoseemyboys.
Me:I '
ll dishupf oryoui nt hemeant i
me.
Him:I tsl ikeyour eadmymi nd, itsgoodt obebackhome.
Heki ssedmycheekt henwal kedt oourr oom.Mom smi l
edatme.
Her:Thosear ebeaut ifulf lower s.
Me:Thankyoumamaandheal sogotmeadr ess.
Iputt hef lower sanddr essont hebr eakf astbarandl ookedf oravaset oputt hef l
ower s,Iput
wat erint hevaset hem di ppedt hem i n.
Me:Theysmel lsof resh.
Her:Youar eonel uckyl ady.
Ismi l
edandwentt oputt hem i nt hel oungenextt ot heoneshegotmewhenIwasst il
lin
hospi t
al, Iwast aki ngver ygoodcar eoft hem.Af tert hatdishedupf orthet hr eeofusandser ved
mom t henj oinedhert oo.30mi nut esl at erhecamet ot heloungedr essedi nshor t
sandavest ,I
gotupt oser vehi m hisf ood.
Him:Thankyoust handwasam.
Inoddedandsatdownnextt ohi m.
Me:Imi ssedyou.
Him:Imi ssedyout ooandIam gl adt obehomewi thmybeaut if
ulwi feandsons.
Iheldhi schi nandki ssedhi slips, justa5secondki ss.
Him:Hmm yourmot heri swat chi ngus.
Ismi l
edashepeckedmyl ips.
Me:Eatupt hengogetar est ,youl ookt ired.
Him:Ihavet ogoseeQhawef irst.
Butof coshehast oseehi sf i
rstsont oo.Inoddedandgavehi m agl assofj uice,het ookasi p
andgavei ttome.Iputi tont hecof feet abl e.
Him:Babeut hiwhatdi dt hatdoct orsayaboutNkosana' seyes?
Me:You' llseet hem whenheopenst hem, theyar ecr ossed.
Him:Wi llhebeabl et oseet hough?
Me:Ut hihemi ghtneedgl asseswhenhegr owsup.
Him:Buthewi l
lseer i
ght ?
Me:Mom sayshecanseebecausehecanf ollowmyf i
ngerwhenIputi tinf rontofhi m.
Him:That '
sgr eatandhi shear tcondi ti
on?
2weeksagohewasdi agnosedwi thahear tpr oblem, hishear twasn' t/isn'tstr ongenough.
Meani nghewi llneedmedi cationever ydayt okeepi tstrongbutt heywer est illrunningmor e
testsbecauset heydi dn' tknowwhatmedi cal condi tionort ermt ouseyet .
Me:Hewi l
lputhi m undermedi cationassoonast heyknowhi sdiagnosi s, hewi l
lbegoi ngfora
checkuponFr iday.Andt heywi l
lgi veust her esul tst hen.
Henoddedandl ookedatme.
Him:Howar eyou?
Me:Ihavet ohavef aithandbest rongf orhi m.
Him:Atl eastIam her enowsoyoudon' thavet of acei taloneanymor e.
Me:Iam gl adyouhome.
Heki ssedt hesi deofmyheadt henf inishedeat ing.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Aftereat ingIgotupandwentt oputt hedi shesi nt hesi nkthenwentt of etchmybagsf rom the
car.Iunpackedt hecl ot hesandt ookt hedi rtyonest ot helaundr yr oom, Iputt hem int he
washi ngbaskett henwentt otheki ds' nur ser y.Phumzawast heref eedingt hem.
Me:BabeIam goi ngt oseeQhawenow.
Her:Okay.
Me:I '
llbebacki nanhour .
Ibentt oki ssherl ipst hent heboys' f
or eheads.
Me:Il oveyou.
Myphoner angi nmypocketdi stur bingus.It ooki toutandaccept edt hecal l
.
Me:Mandl a.
Him:Somet hingi swr ongwi thChant el l
e!Iam comi ngf rom herhouse, shei sn'thome.Her
mot her .
..
Me:Mandl aMandl a,cal m down.Br eat h!
Het ookadeepbr eathandr el
eased.
Me:Nowt alkt ome, what '
swr ong?
Him:Hermot hersaysshedi dn'tcomehome, shenevercamehome.Shet houghtshewas
cominghomewi thus.Shei sn' ther eYandi sa!
Me:Wai t
,whatdoyoumeanshedi dn' tcomehome?Shel eftthel odgeonWednesdaymor ni
ng.
Him:Shei smi ssingdude.
Me:Di dyoucheckwi thhergr an?
Him:Shecal l
edheri nf rontofme, shenevercamehome.Shei sn'tinKi mber ley.Itoldyou
somet hingwasn' tright .
Me:Ar eyousur eshei sn' tt her e?Ar eyouposi ti
veaboutwhatyousayi ng?
Him:Shei sn'ther e!
Me:Damni tmanChant elle!Wher ear eyour i
ghtnow?
Him:Iam goi ngt ot hepol i
cest ati
on.
Me:Not urnar oundandwai tformeatherhouse, I'l
lbet hereint enmi nut es.
Him:Okay.
Idroppedt hecal l
.
Me:Ihavet ogo.
Her:What '
sgoi ngon?Whatdi dChant ell
edo?
Me:Shedi dn' tcomehomewhenshewassupposedt otwomont hsago, I'
llexplainwhenIcome
back.
ShenoddedsoIheadedoutt hedoor ,Iwentt omyr oom f ir
sttoputonshoesandat -
shir
tthenI
wentt othecarout sideanddr ovet oChant el
le'shouse.
.
Igotther eandpar kedbehi ndMandl a'scarandgotof f.Him andMr sAdamswer ehavinga
heatedar gumentout sidesoIgr eet ed, shewi pedherf acet henl ookedatmeupanddown
wit
houtsayi ngawor d.
Me:Ineedt oseeChant elle.Whatdi dyoudot oher ?
Her:Chant ellei sn'ther e, shenevercamehome!
Me:Soyouwontmi ndi fIcheck?
Her:Chant elledi dn' tcomehomewhywoul dIl i
eaboutt hat?
Me:Becauseyouhat eme!Youhat eher !
Her:Don' tcomet omyhouseanddi srespectme!Youar et heoneswhot ookhert oanother
countrysoyoubet tertel lmewher eshei sorIwi lldeal wi ththebot hofyou.
Me:Thesamewayyoudeal twi thher ?!
Her:Whatar eyoui nsi nuat i
ng?ThatIhur ther ?Whywoul dIhurtmyowndaught er?
Me:Thenwher ei sshe?
Her:Idon' tknow!Shenevercal ledt otellanyonet hatshewascomi nghome.
Me:Youar elyingandIknowyouar e!
Mandl a:ShewasasshockedwhenIt oldhert hatshewassupposedt obeher etwomont hsago.
Her:IfChant ellewasher e, hersonwoul dbeher et oo.IknowChant el
leandIdi dn'tseeeyet o
eyebutIwoul dneverdr eam ofhur tingher .
Me:Wher ei she?
Her:InKi mber leywi t
hChant elle'
sgr an.
Me:Gi vemeheraddr essandphonenumber .
Shegavemet henumberandaddr ess.
Her:I'
llcomewi t
hyou.
Me:Doyouknowwher et hisi s?
Her:Ihavenoi dea, that '
sherl atemot her'
smot her .
Inoddedandt urnedt oMandl awhi leshewentt ol ock.
Me:Ishoul dhavel istened, Ishoul dn' thavei gnor edyou.Whati fsomet hingbadhappenedt o
her?
Him:Don' tassumet hewor stndoda.
Me:Ifsomet hinghappenedt oherIwi llneverf orgivemysel f
.
Him:Iwi llneverf or giveyout oobecausei fyoudi dn'thithershewoul dn'thavel eftthelodge.
Me:Fut sekman!Fut sek!
Him:Youar esel fishYandi sa!Youar eahear t
lessbast ard!Allthatgi r
leverdi dwasl oveyou.
Me:Whydoyoual wayshavet oki ckamanwhenhei sdown?
Him:FuckyoumanYandi sa!Fuckyou!
"Canyoust opar gui ngandl et'sgo, I'lldr i
vet het woofyoul ookexhaust edbutwewi llstartat
thepol icest at i
on" ,wenoddedandl ockedourcar st hengoti nwi thher .
.
Mr sAdamscoul ddr i
ve, Jer omet aughtherwel l
.Inl esst han5mi nut eswewer eatt hepol ice
station.Wer epor tedandopenedami ssingper son' sreport.Ipresent edherr ecentpi cturef r
om
thepi cturesshet ookwi t
hmyphone, shel ookedsohappy.Whydi dIhavet ohur ther ?
Officer:Whenwast hel astt imeyousawher ?
Theyl ookedatme.
Me:Ican' tremembert heexactdat eandt imebut2mont hs, 1weekand3daysago.I twasa
Wednesday.
Officer:Wher e?
Me:Backatt hel odgewewer est ayingi natSwazi land.
Officer:Thenameoft hel odge?
Me:HappyVal leyr esor tandcasi no.
Hewr oteever ythi ngdown.
Officer:Didn' tyout hi nkofr epor ti
nghermi ssingwhenshedi sappear ed?
Me:Shedi dn' tdi sappear , shecheckedoutoft hel odgeandt ookherbagswi thher .Igaveher
permi ssiont ol eavesi ncesheaskedf orper mi ssion.It houghtshewasathome, shesai dshe
wasgoi nghome.
Officer:Whati syourr elat i
onshi pwi thher ?
Me:Shei smyassi st ant ,exgi r l
fri
endandt hemot herofmyson.
Henoddedandj ot tedever ythingdown.
Officer:Whatwasshewear ingt hel astt i
meyousawher ?
Me:Shewasi nani ghtdr essandgown, whi t
eandbabypi nk.
Henoddedandwr otei tdown.
Officer:Doesshehaveanyot herr elat ivesbesi desyout hatshewoul dgotoi fshedi dn' tcome
home?
Mr sA:Yesshedoes, shehasasont hatshel ovesdear lyinKi mber l
eyandagr andmot her.
Officer:Andshei sn'ti nKi mber ley?
Mr sA:Noshei sn' t
, Chant ellewoul dn' tgoanywher ewi thoutQhawe.
Officer:Qhawebei ng?
Me:Theson, ourson.
Officer:Youwer et hel astonet oseehersi r?(Inodded)howwasshewhenyoul efther ?
Me:Wehadadi sagr eementaboutsomet hing,itsper sonalsoIwoul dsaydevast ated.
Officer:Soyoucansaymaybesher anaway?Maybeshedoesn' twantt obef ound?
Me:Chant ell
ei sast rongyoungwoman, shewoul dn'trunaway.Andshedamnwel lwoul dwant
tobef ound.
Officer:Youknowt hisbecause?
Me:Shehasbeent hr oughhel landback, sheneverbr okedown.Shewasal waysst rong.
Mr sA:Pl easeof f i
cerweneedyourhel p,findmyst epdaught erplease.
Henodded.
Officer:Iwi llgetonwi tht hecaseassoonaspossi ble,ifIfi
ndanyt hingIwillletyouknow.And
pleasel etusknowi fshemakescont actwi thanyofyou.
Wenodded.
Me:Thanksandpl ease, findher .
Officer:Wewi lldoourbesti nt ryi
ngt ol ocat eher .
Me:Youcancal lmeatanygi vent ime, t
hat '
smynumberont hest atement.
Officer:Iwi llsir.
Me:Thankyou.
Henoddedsowel ef tt hepol icest ation.Mr sAdr oveust oKi mber l
ey.
.
.
Phumza:
Itwasget tingl at eandYandi sawasst i
llnotback, damnyouChant el
le!Thi
shadbet terbenot
someat t
ent ionseeki ngst untt otesti fYandi sast illcaredna.Igotupf rom t
hecouchandwent
topeekoutt hewindow.Doesn' tChant ellehaveaf ami l
yt hatcanl ookf orher ?Whydoes
Yandi sahavet obei nvolvedi nlooki ngf orher ?Maybehest i
lllovesher ,Isawi tonhisreact
ion
tot hecal l.Theywer eeachot hers' fi
rstl ovef orGod'ssakeandt heywer en'tforcedt obe
togetherunl i
keusbutYandi salovesme.Yeshel ovesme, hei smar ri
edt ome.
"Youshoul dgotobedmt anam" ,shespokebehi ndmegi vingmeaf r i
ght.
Me:Howcansomeoneheragegomi ssingmama?Idon' tunder stand.
Her :Peopl egomissi ngal lthet imebaby.
Me:Nomamasomet hingisn'trightapha, maybewhi letheywer einSwazi landt heyfoundeach
otheragai n.MaybeYandi sai sscar edofdi vorcingmet hat'swhyhei slyingabouthergoi ng
mi ssing, heiswithherr i
ghtnowdoi ngGodknowswhat .
Her :That 'snotawi set hi
ngt ot hink.Yandi salovesyou.
Me:Thenwhyi sn'thecal l
ingmet oletmeknowwhat '
sgoi ngon, whyhei sn'thomeyet ?
Doesn' tshehaveaf ami l
y?WhymustYandi salookf orhershei snoneofhi sconcer n?
Her :Theyshar eachi ldtoget herPhumza, hei snotdoi ngt hisf orhimsel fbutt heirson.He
doesn' twanthi mt obemot herless.
Me:ButIam her e, Icanbehi smot her .
Her :Whati sthatsupposedt omean?( If oldedmyar msi nf rontofmychest )That '
snotvery
niceofyou.
Me:Idowanthert obef oundi fshei sr eallymi ssi
ngbutIcan' thelpbutwor rythatthiswil
lbring
them cl ose.Shewi llthinkhei sherkni ght ,herhero.
Her :Standbyyourhusband, suppor thi m.Whenhecomeshomedon' tf i
ghtwi thhi m bet
here
forhim, heneedsyounowf ort hanever .Nowgot obedyouneedal ltheener gyyoucangetf or
tomor row.
Inoddedandwentt obed.WhenIgotont hebedIcal l
edhi m, Iwant edtoknowwhatwasgoi ng
onbuti trandst r
aightt ovoicemai l
.Mxm!St upidman!I sthi sthewayi tisgoi ngt obe?Chantelle
get sintroubl eandcal lsYandi sat ot her escue?

56
Yandi sa:
Whenwegott oChant el
le'sgr andmot her'shouseMr sApar kedt henwegotof f,ItextedPhumza
becauseshet ri
edt ocal lme;" Heymyl ovewest i
llhaven' tfoundorhear danyt hingf rom heryet
.
Wear eathergr andmot her '
shousenowf orQhawe, Iwillt ellyoual labouti tlat er.Iloveyou"I
pressedsendt henIwal kedi n.Mr sAdamswasal readyt ellingChant elle'sgr anaboutwhatwas
goingon, shej ustbr okei nt otear sandMr sAcomf or t
edher .Isatdownnextt oMandl a
awkwar dl
yt i
llshecamedown, shegotoutofMr sAdams' sar msandl ookedatmeandMandl a.
Cha' sgran:Whoar etheseyoungmen?
Mr sA:Ohyesmymi ndi sever ywher e, f
orgi veme.That 'sMandl aandYandi sa, Yandi saisher
bossandMandl aisaf r
iendandacol league.Boyst hisisMr sWi ll
iams, Chant ell
e's
grandmot her .
Shedi dn'tl
ookt hatoldmaybeshewassl ightlyoldert hanmom.Abeaut i
fulsl enderwhi te
brunet t
ewoman.Andshedi dl ooklikehergr anddaught er.
Mr sW:Yandi saYandi sa?( sheputheri ndexf i
ngeroverherl ips)isn'thet heyoungmant hat
brokeherhear tcount lesst imes?Qhawe' ssper m donor ?
Sper m donor ?!Mr sAnodded.Whatt heF? !
Mr sW:Idon' tknowwhatChant ell
eeversawi nyoubecauseyouar enott hathandsomeor
decent .Youhavenor espectf orwomen, noneatal l
.Ipit yt hewomanwhor ai sedyouandt he
womanwhomar r
iedyou.If eelver ysor ryf orthem.
Ilookeddown.
Mr sW:Cutoutt hatbul l
shi t
!Cutoutt hatcr apandl ookatmeyouf uckenpuss!( shegotupand
wal kedtowar dsme, shepunchedmynose.Fuckt hiswoman!Ir ubbedmynose)Youar enot
goingt osither eandactl i
keyouar esor r
yandt hatyoucar eabouther !Thatyour especther
becauseyouandIbot hknowt hatitsal lanact ,
shef el
lf ori tbutIwont .Icur set hedayshemet
youbecauseyouar et hecauseofal lhermi sfor
tunes, youandt hatusel essmanshecal leda
father.
Me:Mr sWi ll
i
ams
Mr sW:Ma' am t oyou!
Me:Iam sor ryma' am
Sheputherhandup.
Mr sW:Idon' twantt ohearyourvoi ce.AndIdon' twantt oseeyouher esoIsuggestt hatyou
futsekoutofmyhouseandoutofmyf ace!
Igotupandwal kedt owar dst hedoorbutdi dn' topent hedoor .Iturnedt olookather ,shewas
fumi ng.
Me:Mr sWi ll
iamsIdi dn' tmeant ohur tyourgr anddaught er
,Icareabouther .AndIwantt ohel p
fi
ndher .
Mr sW:Doyouexpectmet obel i
eveyou?I fyoucar edforheryouwoul dn'thavedoneal lthe
thi
ngsyoudi dtoher ,count lessabor tionsandmi scarr
iages.At housandbr okenpr omises, don'
t
l
ookmei nt heeyeandl iet ome.Idon' twantt oseeyouher e.
Mr sA:Mr sWi ll
iamspl ease.
Mr sW:Nowhati shedoi ngher e?Huh?Al lofyou!Whatar eyoudoi nghere?Yourcoul dbe
behi ndherdi sappear ancebecauseyouwantal lherfather'
sweal th.
Mr sA:Wow!
Mandl a:Ma' am wecomeher ei npeace, wej ustwant edt omakesur ethatshei sn'there.
Whet hershei ssaf eornot ,
wecar eaboutyourgr anddaught erandwer eall
ywantt ohelpin
fi
ndi ngher .
Mr sW:Ij ustwantmygr anddaught erhome, shei sallthatIhave.
Mandl a:Wewi l
lwor kwi ththepol i
cet ot ryandt r
ackherdown.
Shenodded.
Me:Andi fyoudon' tmi ndIwoul dl iket oseemyson.
Shel ookedatme.
Mr sW:ComeIwi llshowyout ohi sr oom.
Shel edt hewayandIf ol l
owedaf terhert ohi sr oom.Sheopenedt hedoorandst eppedasi de.I
turnedont hel ight ,hewassl eepi ngsopeacef ul l
y.
Me:Iwoul dliket ot akehi m homewi thme, please.
Mr sW:Whowi l
ll ookaf terhi m?
Me:Iam hi sfat her ,Iwi lltakecar eofhi m andt her eismymot herandsi blingstoo.
Mr sW:It hinkt hatwi llbeagr eati deabecausehehasbeenaski ngabouthi smot herandnow
thatshei snowher et obef ound, Idon' tknowi fIcanl ookathi m andpr etendl i
keever yt
hingi s
okaywhenIdon' tknowwher eshei s.
Me:Thankyou.
Her :I'l
lpackhi sbags.
Me:Iam sor ryaboutwhat 'sgoi ngon, wear egoi ngt ofindherandshei sgoi ngtocomehome.
Her :Ihopeso, Ireal lyhopeso.
Shequi ckl ypackedQhawe' scl ot hesi ntoabag.
Her :Youknowt hathei sast hmat icr ight ?
Me:YesIdo.
Her :Thi si shi spumpanddoct or '
spr escr ipti
oni ncaseher unsoutofpumps.
Iscoopedt hesl eepi ngQhawei ntomyar msandki ssedhi sforehead.
Me:ThanksandIam r eallysor r yforhur ti
ngyourgr anddaught er.
Shenoddedandhel pedmewi t hQhawe' sbags.
Her :Youshoul dgi vemeyourcont actdet ailssot hatIcancal ltocheckonhi m andI '
llkeepyou
post edi fshet ur nsup.
Me:I fwehearanyt hingwewi llalsokeepyoupost ed.
Her :Please.
Inoddedandt hankedheronceagai nt henwentt otheloungewi thQhaweandhi sbags.When
Mandl asawmehegotupt ohel pmewi t
ht hebags.
Me:Comeonl et sgo.
Wet hankedMr sWi lli
amsandl eftherpr omi singt okeepherupdat ed.Wewentt ogetont hecar
thendr ovebackt oCapet own.
.
.
Phumza:
Iwokeupt oanempt ybed, Isatupandt ookmyphonet ocheckt het i
me6h30.Igotoutofbed
andwentt ohaveashowert henwentt of eedandbat ht heboys, afterf eedingandbat hingthem
Iputt hem backt obed.ThenIwentt olot i
onmybodyandgetdr essed, thenaf terIwentt othe
kit
chent omakesomet hingt oeat .AsIwasst il
lbusyaknockcamet hr ought hef rontdoorandI
wentt ogeti t,Yandi sawal kedi ncar ryingQhaweandhi sbags.
Him:Heybabe.
Me:Heyhowi she?
Him:Hedoesn' tknowanyt hing, hej ustwokeupt oaskabouthi smot herandt hatwasi t.
Me:I tcantbeeasyf orhi m.
Him:Yeah, I'
llgoputhi m down.
Me:I '
lltaket hebags.
Him:Thankyou.
Hel ookedexhaust edhi msel f,Itookt hebagsandf ollowedaf t
ert hem t oQhawe' sr oom.Heput
Qhawedownandt uckedhi mi nt hensatont hebedwi thhi sheadbur iedi nhishands.Seei ng
himl iket hisbecauseofanot herwomanr eallyhur tbutmom' swor dscamet omi nd;'standby
him' andIwentt okneel bef or ehim.Ir est edmyar msonhi slapandpeekedathi m, hewas
crying.Whatt hehel l?!Ar eyour eallygoi ngt ocr yf oranot herwoman?Cal m down, calm down
Phumza.Ican' tdot his, Icantwat chhi m cr yf orhi sex.Icantbepar toft hisitsclearasdayl i
ght
thathei sst i
llinl ovewi thher ,Ican' tdoi t.Ithur t
s.Iwi pedmyf acequi etlythengotupbuthe
heldmyhands.
Him:Iam sor r
yi tsj ust .
..
Me:Shh( Iputmyhandoverhi smout h)gogetsomer est.
Him:NoIhavet obeawakei ncaset heycal l,i
ncasehewakesupaski ngabouthi smot her.
Isowant edt osnat chmyhandsoutofhi sandsnapathi m, ImeanIal soneededhi m.Ourson
neededhi m butChant elleandhersonj usthadt ocomef irst.Ijustwi shshewasl yi
ngi nthe
ditchsomewher edead-Ican' tbel ieveIj ustsai dt hat .Ishookt hatthoughtof fmymi ndandt ook
myhandsoutofhi sandcuppedhi sf ace, hehel dmyar ms.
Me:Youl ookexhaust edYandi sahowcanyouhel pwhenyouar el i
ket his?Youneedt ohavea
shower ,eatandgetsomesl eep.Iwi lltakecar eofQhawewhenhewakesup.
Him:Wakemeupi fanyonecal lsmyphone.
Inoddedandheki ssedmyf orehead.
Him:Thankyoubabeandpl easeputi tint hechar gerf orme.
Het ookouthi sphoneandgavei tt ome.
Me:I '
llmakeyousomet hingt oeat ,gohaveashower .
Igotupandt ookhi sphonet henwentt ot helounge, Iputt hephoneont hechar gerthenwentt o
fi
ni shwhatIst arted.Imadehi m hisf avor it
eEngl ishbr eakf astt henwentt oourr oom t oserve
him, hehadj ustgotoutoft hebat hr oom, hehadat owelwr appedar oundhi swai standhe
l
ookedsodamnhot .Imi ssedt hevi ew, Iputt hetraydownt henwal kedovert ohim.Iputmy
armsar oundhi swai standl ookedupathi m, hel ookeddownatmeandweshar edaki ss.
Me:Imi ssedt hisbeaut iful, sexybodyofyour s.
Hechuckl edandki ssedmynose.
Him:Iam l uckyt ohaveyoui nmyl i
fedoyouknowt hat ?Il oveyouPhumza.
Me:Il oveyout oo.
Weshar edanot herki ssandIr eall
ywi shedwecoul dt akei tf urtherbutt hedoct oradvi sedust o
wai tf or6mont hsbecauseIwasbr eastf eeding.Hebr oket heki ssandsmi led.
Him:4mor emont hsst handwasam.
Me:Sucksne?
Hel aughedandbr okeawayf rom me.
Him:It houghtt hebabi eswer emaki ngyouhotandsexyal lthet ime.
Hepi ckedupacupofcof feeandt ookasi p.
Me:Wel lyoucan' tbl ameal adyf ormi ssi ngherdel icioushusband.
Him:Imi ssyout oomyl ovebutt hisi sf oroursons' wel lbei ng.Howar ethey?
Me:Goodandsl eepi ng, don' twor r yaboutt hem.Eatandgetsomer est .
Him:Hasanymor ecal led?
Me:Nope.
Him:Ar eyousur e?
Me:I '
llwakeyouupi fsomeonecal l
s.
Henodded.
Him:Iknowt hisi sn'teasyf oryoubutIappr eciateyout ryingt obemor eaccommodat iveofthe
situation.
Me:Ij ustwanthert ot ur nupf oryourson' ssake.
Him:Thankyoust handwa.
Me:Eat .
Iwal kedoutoft hebedr oom andr olledmyeyest henwentt othekitchen, It
ookmyf oodand
wentt oeati nf rontoft het v.
.
"Mor ningbaby" ,shesai dsi tti
ngdownacr ossmewi thapl ateoffood.Whendi dshepassher e?
Imustr eallyhaveal otonmymi nd.
Me:Mor ningmom.
Her :IsawQhawei nhi sr oom.
Me:Theyj ustgothome.
Her :Anynewsabouthi smot her ?
Igotupandcheckedt hepassagef orYandi sa.
Me:Mxm Iwi shshei sdi scover eddead.
Shegasped.
Her :Youdon' tmeant hat .
Me:Youshoul dhaveseenhowYandi sawasmama, hewascr yi
ngforheri nmypr esence.If
shecomesbackmymar riagei soveri tscl earthathest il
llovesher .
Her :Youl oveassumi ngt hewor st,hewontl eaveyou.
Me:Youdon' tknowwhatIsaw.
Yandi sa' sphonevi brat edont hesi det able,Iwalkedovert oitandchecked.I twasanunknown
number ,mxm Il ockedt hephoneandi tstoppedvi brati
ng.
Her :Whatar eyoudoi ng?
Me:Shecan' tcomebackmama.
Her :That '
ssel fi
shofyou.
Me:WhydoIhavet obeni ceal lthet ime?Ihadt oacceptt heirpastandt hefactthattheyhavea
sont oget her , Ihadt oacceptt hatboyasmychi l
d.
Her :It
syourdut yashi swi fe.
Me:Ohwi llitst i
llbemydut ytoacceptever ycrapbei ngt hrownatmewhent hatwomancomes
backandr epl acesme?Mamayoudon' tknowhowmuchi thurtstoseeyourhusbandmi ser
able
andexhaust edbecauseofanot herwoman, toseehi mi nt earsandyouknowt hati
tsbecause
hisexi smi ssi ng.
Her :HushPhumzadon' tst resspl easeyouar ebr eastfeeding.
Thephonevi br atedagai nandIwentt ochecki t,
anunknownnumberst i
ll
.Ilockeditandputi t
away.
Her :Yoh
Shecl appedonceanddr ankherj uice.
Her :Phumza
Sheshookherhead.
Me:Pl easemamayouhaveneverbeenwher eIam sopl easedon' tj
udgemer i
ghtnow.
Her :Iam notj udgi ngyou, Iam j ustsayi ngt hisisnotl i
keyou.
Ilookedatt hephoneandgotup, Itooki tandwentt ogivei ttoit
sownerwhowasf l
atout.When
i
tvi bratedIt ookt hecal l
.
.
Me:Yandi sa' sphonehel l
o.
Cal l
er:Goodmor ningma' am canyoupl easeputMrDl ami nionthephone, t
hisisdetecti
ve
Nhl okwanaont hephone.
Me:Ohdet ect iveMrDl ami niasyoucal lhimissl eeping,Ihavebeent r
yingt owakehi m upfor
thepast10mi nutes.
Det ective:I sheokay?
Me:Yeshei s, hei sst il
lbr eathing.
Det ective:Okaygoodpl easet el
lhi mt ocomeseemeassoonasheget st hismessagei tsabout
Chant el l
eAdams.
Me:Hasshebeenf ound?
Detect ive:Andyouar e?
Me:Hi swi fe, Mr sDl ami ni.
Detect ive:Hmm noshehasn' tbeenf oundbewehavesomet hing, tellyourhusbandt ocal lme
orcomeseeme.
Me:Iwi ll
.
Detect ive:Thankyouma' am.
Hehungup, Iqui etlywal kedoutoft her oom andwentt ot helounge.Whydoeshehavea
passwor dkengoku?HehoYandi samadoda!Iputhi sphonebacki nt hechargerthenwentt o
checkont heboys, theywer est illsl eepi ng.Iwentt ocheckonQhawe, hewasawakeand
l
ooki ngar oundt her oom ner vousl y.Hehasneverspentorseent her oom bef or
esoIcan
i
magi nehowaf raidhewas.
.
Me:Heyyouar eawake?
Hisfacer el axedwhenhesawmeandhenodded.
Me:Comel et smakeyousomet hingt oeatt henwecangetyoucl eanedup.
Henoddedandgotof fthebed, t hi ski ddi dn'treal l
yt alkmuch.Onehar dl
yhear dhisvoi ce, i
ts
onlywhenhewas/ ist alkingt ohi sf at herorhi scr yingt hatyougett oheari t
.AnywayIt ookhi s
handandwewentt ot heki t
chen, Iputhi m ont hecupboar dthenmadehi m somet hingt oeat
andf edhi m.Af terdoi ngsowewentt ot hebat hroom andIgavehi m abat hthendr essedhi mi n
cleancl othes.AsIwaspacki nghi scl othesawayIf eltasof ttabonmyl eg,Ilookeddownat
him.
Him:Wher ei smommy?
Me:Uhm I 'l
l takeyout oyourf ather .
HenoddedandIt ookhi mt ohi sf at her .
Me:Yandi sa
Ishookhi m awake, l
ucki l
y.Her ol ledoverhi sbackandr ubbedhi seyeswi thasmi leonhi sf ace.
Yandi :Heybeaut iful
Atleasthewokeupi nabet termood.
Me:Heyhandsomeyourl itt
lemani sawake.
Yandi :Al l thesemenar el itt
lewhoar eyout alkingabout ?
Me:Qhawe
Ipickedhi m upandputhi m ont hebed.Isawasmi l
eonQhawe' sf acewhenhesawhi sf ather,
theywer ebestf ri
endsbutt heyar guedorf oughtl ikecr azyandi twasal waysoversomet hing
smal l.It hinki tsbecauset heyar esomuchal ike,theyhavet hesameper sonali
ti
es.
Yandi :Heyboy
Qhawe:Heydaddy, arewegoi ngt omommynow?
Yandi sal ookedatmet hensatup.
Yandi :Mommyaskedmet ol ookaf teryouf oracoupl eofdaysbutshewi l
lcomebackf oryou.
Tearswor medoutofhi seyesandhi sf atherwi pedt hem af t
erplaci nghi m onhi slap.
Yandi :Heywhyar eyoucr ying?
Qhawe:Mommydoesn' tloveQhaweanymor e.
Hespokeast hethi rdper sonever ytimehewasmadatsomeone, hewasn' tevenmybi rthson
butIknewhi m sowel l
.
Yandi :Whydoyousayt hat ,shel ovesyou.
Qhawe:Shedoesn' tseehi m anymor e.Shedoesn' tcal lhim anymor e.
Seeingt hel ittl
eboycr yandf eel sounl ovedbyhi smot hermademer eal
isethatIwasbei ng
selfi
sht owi shdeat huponhi smot herbutIcoul dn' thel pit.
Me:Det ect i
veNhl okwanacal l
ed, hehassomet hingf oryou.Socal lhim orgoseehi m.
Yandi :ThankyoubabeI 'l
lgoseehi m.Qhawemommyl ovesyoushewi l
lcomebackt oyouas
soonasshei sdonewi thwhat evershei sdoi ngandwhenshecomesbackshewi l
lbuyyou
somet hingni ceandabi gcart hatyoucant aket oschoolandshowof ftoyourf r
iends.Comeon
daddyhast ogosomewher e, stopcr yi ng.
Heputhi m ont hebedt hengotof f.
Yandi :Hayi keIdon' tknowwhatt osaywhenhewontst opcryingut hiwher emustIt akeher ?
Anduzuhl alel alent omna, uyaf eket hal omt ana.( Iwontst andt his, hei sbeingababyr i
ghtnow)
Hewal kedoutl eavi ngmewi tht hecr yingQhawe, hecr iedevenmor er aisinghisvoi ce.Yoh
Yandi sadi dn'thavel ovef orki dsshame, hispat i
encer anoutever yt i
meQhawedi dthisbutit
wasbet terwhenChant ellewasar oundbecausehewoul dj ustputheront hephoneort akehim
backt oher .Hei ssuchamomma' sboyl i
kehi sfat herandmot heringhi m whenhei ssoused
andat tachedt ohi smot heri sgoi ngt obehar d.Hecr i
edt i
llher anoutofbr eathandhewas
gaspi ngf orai r,Iliftedhi m upandwi pedhi sf ace.
Me:Comeoncal m downboy, please.Yandi saman! !
Iwal kedoutofourr oom.
Yandi :What ?!Hei sspoi l
towo!
Iwentt ot henur ser ybecauset hat '
swher ehewaspeeki ngf rom.
Me:Your eal lyhavenol ovef orki dsdoyou?
Onel ookatQhaweandhet ookhi m.
Yandi :Yesesl omt ana!Hi sast hmapumpbabe!
Me:Ast hma?
Ididn'tknowanyt hi ngabouthi m bei ngast hmat i
c, Iranoutaf terYandi sat oQhawe' sr oom.
Yandi :Hi sbags!Wher ear et hey?
Itookt hem outandhet ookouthi spumpandhel pedhi mt oi nhalef r
om i t.
Yandi :Nowbr eat hepl ease, pleasecal m down.
AssoonasQhawecal meddownandhi sbreat hingwasnor malYandi sagotupandwi pedhis
forehead, hewassweat ingshame.
Yandi :Iam sor ryokay?
Hel if
tedhi m upandbr ushedhi sback.
Yandi :Daddydi dn' tmeant oshoutorwal koutonyou, sorry.
Me:Youdi dn' ttellmet hathei sast hmat ic.
Yandi :Becausehedi dn'thaveanat t
ackunt iltoday, sorryst handwasam.
Me:Butyoushoul dhavet oldmeQhawewhati fwewer eal one?Hewasgoi ngtodi eandyou
wer egoi ngt obl amemef orhi sdeat h.
Yandi :Iam sor ryst handwasam, sor r
yIwasn' tthinki ng.(heki ssedmyf orehead)Mandl awil
lbe
heret opi ckmeup.
Me:Wher ear eyougoi ng?
Him:Toacardeal er shipi tsaboutt imeIgott hem acarandt henI'l
lgot othepol icest ati
onto
seet hedet ect i
ve.
Inodded.
Me:SoIcanl ear nhowt odr ivesoon?
Hechuckl edandki ssedmyf or eheadagai n.
Him:Noyoubr east feedi ngandt heyar estil
lyoung.
Me:But .
..
Him:Nobut smyl ove, notanyt imesoon.Maybewhent heyar e6mont hsorayearol d.
Me:Youcan' tbeser ious, whowi lldriveusar oundwhenyouatwor k?
Him:Uzobeuyaphi wedwangobawewi l
lgot ot hedoct or'scheckupst oget herandwecanal so
shopt oget her .
Me:Speaki ngoft hatt heyar er unni ngoutofnappi esandVasel i
ne.
Him:I 'l
l gett hem bef or egoi ngt ot hepol icest ation.
Me:Newbor nbabynappi esmyl ove.
Him:Nappi esar enappi esnj e.
Me:Not heynotI '
llshowyout hepapersoyouwontbuyabi ggersize.
Hechuckl edandf ollowedaf termet ot henur sery.Ishowedhi mt henappi esandhet ooka
pictureoft hepacket .
Him:Goti thowmanymustIget ?
Me:Idon' tknow, tol astt hem amont hmaybe.AndVasel i
nebabe, theor i
ginalonedon' tbe
buyingal lthesef ancyonesl ikel astt ime.
Hel aughed.
Him:Youdon' tf orgetne?
Me:Ha. aar eyousur ethatyougoti t
?IcanaskLubanzit ohel pyou.
Him:Lubanzi ?WhatdoesLubanzi havet odowi tht hisandt hem?Iam t heirfathernotLubanzi .
HehLubanziwi llhel pme?I 'l
lt akeQhawewi t hme.
Hewal kedoutoft henur ser ywi thQhawei nhi sarms, laterhewi l
lcompl ainaboutsomeone
spoili
nghi m buthei sspoi l
inghi m kuqal a.Whocar r
iesa4yearol d?Nobahei sshortkebutnje
heist oool dt obecar r
ied.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Mandl acal ledt osayhewasout sidet hegat esoIopenedt hegat eforhim.
Me:BabeI '
llseeyouwhenIcomebackne?Hasheeat en?
Her:YeahIj ustf edhi m mi nut esago.
Me:Andt heboys?
Her:I'l
lgof eedt hem agai n.
Me:Al ri
ght, willyouneedanyt hingf rom theshops?
Her:Somet hi ngni ce.
Me:Al ri
ghtst handwasam.
Ipeckedherl ipst hent ookQhawe' shandandwal kedoutt oMandl a'
scar .Wesal ut
edeach
othert henwegoti nthecarandhedr oveout .
Mandl a:Sowher ear ewegoi ng?
Me:Tot hecardeal ership, t
heyhavemycarandt akei ttomyguyst odot hei nteri
or.
Iorder edadust /rustChevr ol etTahoeandIwant edawhol ediff
erentsetupoft hebackseat
i
nterior ,
somet hi ngt oaccommodat emybi gf amily.Andmypanelbeat erguyswer ereal
lygood
atitsot heywer egoi ngt odoi tforagoodbonus.
Mandl a:Okay.Anynews?
Me:Det ectivecal ledsowewi l
lgot her eafterdr oppingof ft
hecaratt hepanelbeat ers.
Him:Ihopei tsgoodnews.
Me:Met oo, Ireal lywannaf indherdude.
Henodded.
.
Whenwegott ot hedeal ershi pImadet hefinalpaymentt hentheyhandedmet hekeys.
Me:Thankyou.
Manager :Itwasgooddoi ngbusi nesswi thyou.
Me:I ndeed, comeboy.
Ibuckl edhi m ont hef r
ontpassengerseatt hengotont hedriver
'sseatandst artedtheengine.
Me:Howdoyoul ovedad' snewcar ?
Him:I tsal r
ight .
Me:Justal right ?I tsdope.
Him:I tsdope.
Me:That 'sright !
Hesmi ledandIl aughed.Af teraf ewmi nutesIpar kedi nthepanelbeat ersandhandedt hem t
he
keys,It rusteddamn.
Me:Youdar escr atchityoul oseyourj obs.
Them:Youcant rustusboss.
Me:Iwanti treadyby6.
Them:Nopr obl em.
Wegotonwi t
hMandl aandhedr oveust ot hepol icest ati
on.Whenwegott herethedetecti
ve
tol
dusaboutt hei rf i
ndings, shecheckedoutoft hel odgeandbookedaf lightinDur banbut
missedi t.I
tsl ikeshej ustvani shedandnooneknewhoworhowwewer egoi ngtofindher.
Whet hershewasst i
llali
veordeadandt heirconcl usionwasshewasnomor e, noonejust
vanishesf r
om t hesur faceofear t
hj ustl i
ket hat.

58
Phumza:
Iwaswokenupbyacal lfr
om Yandi
sa,hespentthenightinQhawe'
sroom becausehewas
upset
.
Him:Morningbeauti
ful
Me:Morninghandsome, howishe?
Him:Bet
terthanlastni
ght,whatt
imeisthedoctor'
sappointment
?
Me:At10.
Him:Thenwebet terwakeup, wi llyouneedhel pwi t
hbat hingt heboys?
Me:Ar en' tyouscar edoft hem now?
Hechuckl ed.
Him:I '
l
l beamanandbat ht hem.
Me:Thi si sn'taboutwhatIsai dyest erdayr ight ?
Him:ThatIdon' tsuppor tyou?
Me:Yeah.
Him:Noi tsaboutmebei ngaf ather .
Me:Okayt henl etsmeeti nt hei rr oom i nami nut e.
Him:Seeyoui nami nut e.
Ismi l
edanddr oppedt hecal lthengotup.Iwor eagownandwentt ot hebat hroom f i
rst
,I
washedmyhandsandni ppl eswi t
hhotwat ert henwentt ot henur sery.Yandi saandQhawe
wer ealreadyt her et alking, somet imesQhawespokel i
kehewasspeaki ngsomef oreign
l
anguage.Theonl yper sonIcoul dhearwasYandi sa.
Me:Mor ni ng.
Yandi:Mor ningMr sDl ami ni.
Hewr appedhi sar msar oundmeandki ssedmyl ips.
Me:Someonei si nagoodmood.
Yandi:Iam.
Me:Iwonderwhatgotyoui nsuchagoodmood.
Yandi:West art
ingt hedr ivingl essonst oday.
Iwashol di ngmybr eat ht hinki ngt hathewasgoi ngt osayt heyf oundherandshei sali
ve,Jesus
ChristIknowi t
swr ongofmet owi sht hatuponherbutIhonest l
ydi dn'twantherar ound.
Me:Ihadnoi deat hatyouwer esof ondofgi vi ngdr i
vingl essons.
Yandi:Notbutj ustbecauseI '
llbet eachi ngyouIam exci ted.
Me:Ne?
Yandi:Yep.
Me:Sowhi chcarar ewegoi ngt ouse?
Yandi:Mi ne.
Me:You' llletmedr iveyourcar ?
Him:Yeahyouj usthavet ol ist ent omyi nstruct ionscar ef ullyanduset hem.
Me:Okay.
Igotoutofhi sar msandt ookSi yabul elafirst,Isatdownont hecouchandf edhim.
.
Webuckl edt heki dsont hei rseat sonebyone, t
heywer er ealhar dwor kthatwedi dn'
tevenget
paidfor .Theygott hei rfat hersweat ingl i
kecr azywhenhewasbat hingt hem, wellheonly
bathedhal fandIbat hedt heot herhal f.Wegoti nt ooandhedr oveust othehospi t
al.Whenwe
gotther ehepar kedt henwegotof f.
Me:Howar ewegoi ngt ocar ryt hem?
Him:Weshoul dhavet houghtoft hatbef orel eavi ngt hehouse, geez.
Hescr at chedhi shead.
Him:Twoi neachhand, wet aki ngt heseat swi thus.
Hesai dunbuckl edt hei rcarseat s.
Me:Car efulnott odr opt hem Yandi sa.
Him:Iwontmyl ove.( hi sphoner ang)Hol donIt hinkIhavet ot aket his.
Her eachedi ntohi spocketandt ookouthi sphone.
Him:Dl ami ni...
.Speaki ng. .
..YesIknowherbutar eyousur ei tsher ?
...
..Noi tsf i
neyounot
botheringme. ..
.I nJohannesbur g?Whati sshedoi ngther e?. .
...Hospi tal
?Whywhathappened?
...
..Noyouhavet ot ellmewhathappened, Ican' tjusttr avelal l t
hewayt herewi t
houtknowi ng
i
fitsser iousornot .
....What ?!I '
ll bet here,pleasekeepacl oseeyeonherf orme.. ..
.Thankyou
forlet
tingmeknow, t
hankyou.Makesur et hatsheget st hebestcar e,I'l
lbet hereassoonas
possible.. ...Thankyou, yout oo.
Hedr oppedt hecal landsi ghedoutofr el
ief,hel ookedr elievedandt hatonl ymeantonet hi
ng.
Theyf oundherandhewasgoi ngt odr opmel ikeahotpot atoagai n!Andt ravelallthewayt o
Johannesbur gforhi sbabymama, hisex.
Me:Soar eyougoi ngt ot ellmewhatt hatwasabout ?
Him:ThatwasDrPhi lVanDuToi tf rom Johannesbur ghospi tal
,Chant elleist her eandshei s
alive.
Me:Whati sshedoi ngi nhospi tal?
Him:Theyar est il
lr unni ngt est sonherbutl ooksl i
kei thast odowi thdr ugs.
Me:Sheusesdr ugs?
Him:Noshehasneveruseddr ugsbutIdon' tknow.Babel etsgoi nsot hatIcangett ot he
bot tom oft hi s.
Me:Don' tt ellmet hatyougoi ngt her e.
Him:I 'm sor rybabebutIhavet o, sheneedsme.
Me:Wowwhataboutourl essons?
Him:For givemest handwasam. ..
Me:I tsf ine.
Idi dn' twantt oheari treal ly, itwasqui teclearwher eIst ood.Chant el
lecamef irstandI ,last.I
tookSi yabul ela, Sibusi so, Qhayi yaandLuvuyowhi l
ehet ookNkosana, Lonwabo, Si
buleleand
Vuyol wet hu.Hegavet hekeyt oQhawet ol ockt hecart henwewal kedi nandwentt othe
recept i
ont henwesatdownqui etlyandwai tedt obet oldt ogot hrough.At10h00DrHami lton,
thei rdoct orwal kedovert ousaf tert aki ngf ilesf rom t her ecept i
on.
Dr: Goodmor ni ng, youar er i
ghtont imepl easecomet hrought omyof f ice.
Wegotupandf ollowedaf terhi m.Whenwegott otheof ficewesatdownandhecheckedt he
kids, wei ghi ngt hem andal l oft hat .
Dr: Theyseem t obegai ni ngwei ghtl ikenor malbabi eswoul d, what everyouar edoi ngdon' tstop
please.Theyl ookheal thyi nf actt heyar eheal t
hy, theirhear tbeat sar enor mal .
WenoddedandhecheckedNkosana' seyes.
Yandi :Dowehavet owor ryabouthi seyes?
Dr: Fornowyoudon' tbutwhenheget sol derhemi ghtneedt ousespect aclesf orcl earervi si
on
buthewi llhavet ogot hr oughaneyet estt hatwi l
ltellusi fheneedsspect acl esornot .Unt il
thenwedon' thavet owor ryabouthi ssi ght, alotofki dswi thhi ssi mi larcondi ti
ondon' teven
needspect acl es.Andhi si snott hatbad, Ihaveseenwor se.
Yandi :Okaysowhatabouthi shear tcondi tion?Dowehaveanyt hingt owor ryabout ?
Dr: That '
st hemosti mpor tantt hing, Ihavet her esul t
soft het estswer anonhi m.Theydon' t
showanyt hingmeani nghei sper fect lyheal thyandhewi llleadanor mall i
fel ikehi ssibli
ngs.
Me:ThankGodbecauseIwoul dhat ei tforhi mt oliveonmedi cationf ort her estofhi slife.
Iwaspr ayi ngr eallyhar df orhi sheal thsoIwasr eall
ygr atef ulandr elieved.
Yandi :Thet hi ngt hatyousaw?
Dr: Itwasaf al seal ar m, wer ant estsoverandoveragai nandnot hingnegat iveappear ed.Your
soni sheal thy.
Yandi sat ookmyhandandki ssedi t.
Yandi :Hei sgoi ngt obef inebabe.
Me:Yeah.
Iwasst i
ll madathi m, Iwasf umi ngwi thanger .Mybl oodwasr eallyboi lingr ightnow.Howdar e
hedr opsmef orChant elle?
Yandi :Thankyoudoct or, whenwi llthei rnextappoi ntmentbe?
Dr: Inamont hsol et ssaySept ember .
Wenodded, hegotupandi nj ect edt hem wi tht hei nsul int hatwasgoi ngt opr ot ectthem agai nst
sicknessesl ikef lueandsoon.Theyhavenevercr iedsohar d, t
heyevent urnedpi nk.Myhear t
justsankandIendedupcr yingwi t
ht hem, Yandi sajustl aughedatmeandhushedt hem whi leI
fedt woatat ime.Whent heywer eal lf edandqui etwel eftt hedoct or'sof fice.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Ipar kedi nt hegar aget henwegotof fandt ookt heki dsi nsi de, weputt hem ont heirbedsi nt he
nur ser ythenwentt oourbedr oom.Phumzawasqui etal lt hewaybackhomeandt hatonl y
meantonet hi ng, shewasmadatmeandIunder stoodwhybutIhadt odot his.Icoul dn'tjust
l
eavehert her e,shei sQhawe' smot heraf teral l.Itookoutmysmal lbagandpacked2j eansand
twot -shi rts, Iwasn' tpl anni ngonst ayi ngt her e.Iwasj ustgoi ngtof etchChant elleandcome
back.
Phumi :Doyoul oveherYandi sa?
Ilookedather .
Her:Doyou?Becausei fyoudoyoucant el lmer ightnowsoIcanpackmybagsandgetoutof
yourl i
fe.
Me:Shei sQhawe' smot her .
Her:St ophi di ngbehi ndt hatandanswert hedamnquest i
on!
Istoodbef or eherandt ookherhands.
Me:Babepl easet ryt ounder stand,Ican' tabandonheri nJohannesbur gallal one.
Her:Whataboutherf ami ly?Shehasaf ami l
yYandi sa.Youal sohaveaf ami lyandt hat '
sus, me
andoursons.
Me:Iknowbabebutt her eisar easonshegavet hem mynumber .
Icouldn' thelpbutt hinkshewasi ntroubl eandsheneededme.
Her:Yesshest i
lllovesyou.
Iknewt hatal readybutIcoul dn'ttellPhumi that.
Me:Noshedoesn' t,shej ustneedsaf r i
endr i
ghtnow.Babepl easetrytounder stand.
Her:Under stand? !Under standt hatmyhusbandwant stor unof ft
oanot hert ownf orhi sex? !
Me:Shei sQhawe' smot her sandIneedt odot hisf orhi m.
Her:Youkeephi dingQhawe!Canyoueverbehonestwi thme?
Me:Il oveherassomeoneIshar easonwi thnotr omant i
cally.
Her:Andyouexpectmet obel i
evethat ?
Me:Yesbabe, Iloveyou.Youar emywi fe, myl ife.Ndi thandawenanother .Iam doi ngt hisfor
mysonpl easet ryt ounder standt hatheal soneedsamot her.
ShenoddedsoIki ssedherf orehead.
Me:Thankyou.
Her:Ar eyout akinghi m wi t
hyou?
Me:YeahI '
llpi ckupMandl aonourwayt her e.
Her:Soshoul dIpackhi m abag?
Me:I '
llpacki tbabedon' tst r
essabouti t
.
Iwalkedoutandwentt oQhawe' sroom, It oolaf ewofhi sclot hesthenr eturnedt omyr oom and
packedt hem wi thmycl ot hesandzi ppedt hebag.
Me:Wi l
lyouwal kusout ?
Shenoddedt hent ookt hebagandwal kedout ,wef ollowedaf terhert othelounget henout side
tomycar .Ibuckl edQhaweont hebackseatpassengerseatt henputourbagi nt heboot .
Me:Babe
Her:Hmm
Me:Don' tcrypl ease.
Shenodded, ipul ledhert omeandwi pedhert earst henki ssedherl ips.
Me:Il oveyou.
Her:Iloveyout oo.
Weshar edaki sst henIgoti nthecaranddr oveout .Ihoot edonceanddr oveof f
.
.
.
Phumza:
Ilookedupt henwi pedmyt earsandwenti nsi de.
Mom:Baby
Me:Mamapl easest opwi thyour" wi se"wor ds, Idon' tneedyouradvi ceplease.
Shenoddedandgavemespace, Igotont hecouchandpul l
edapi l
lowt omychesthuggi ngi t.I
justpour edmyt ear sout .Idi dn'twantt obepar toft hismar ri
ageanymor e,Ididn'twantt obe
partofi tint hef irstpl ace.Butt heyf or cedmei ntot hispat het i
cmar ri
agewi thast r
anger ,
someonewhodi dn' tlove, someonewhoi scl earlyinl ovewi thsomeoneel se.Ihaveneverf elt
sost upidi nmyl ife, hedoesn' tloveme.Becausei fhedi dhewoul dn'thavel eftmei nt earst ogo
savehi sexgi rl
friendl eeJobur g,ithur tsobad.Justt hinkingabouti t,Iwant ednopar tofi t
anymor e.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Wegott oJohannesbur gi nt heear lyhour soft hemor ningandcheckedi ntoahot elinRosebank.
Qhawewasf astasl eepsoIputhi mt obedt hencal l
edPhumzat oapol ogizeonemor etime.
Leavingherl i
ket hatdi dn'tgodownwel lbutIhadt odot hi s,IdroveChant ell
ei nt ot hismadness,
Ihadt otakeherout .Shet ookt hecal l aftersomet i
meandsai dnot hing.
Me:Hey
Her:....Butshewasbr eat hing.
Me:Iam sor r
yIl ef tyoul iket hat .
Her:.....
Me:OkayIwi llcal lyoui nt hemor ning.
Shedr oppedt hecal lfirst,gr eatYandi sa!Congr atulat i
ons!Iundr essedandgoti nbednextt o
myson, Chant ell
et hi sbet terbegoodbecauseIam r i
skingmymar r
iageherf oryou.
.
Inaf ewhour st her oom wasf il
ledwi thsunshi ne, Ist r
etchedandgotoutofbed.Ical l
edr oom
serviceandor der edbr eakf astf ort het hreeofust hencal ledPhumza.Shet ookt hecal lwhenI
hadgi venupandIwasaboutt odr opt hecal l.
Her:WhatYandi sa?What ?
Me:Iwant edt oapol ogi ze.
Her:Youknownot hi ngaboutapol ogi esbecausei fyoudoyouwoul dn'tbet her ef oryourex.
Me:Okay.
Her:IwantoutYandi sa, Ican' tstayi na3menmar riage.
Me:Ther ei snot hir dper sonnj ePhumza!
Her:Ther ei sChant el le,Ican' tcompet ewi t
hher .Youandhershar eal ottoget her ,youhavea
pastt oget her.
Me:Apastnaweuyat shoPhumzapl easedon' tdot his,don' twantoutofmyl if
epl ease.
Her:Thenchoose!I tsmeandt hem orherandherson.
Me:Youcan' tfor cemet ochoosebet weenmychi ldrenPhumza.
Her:Qhawecomesasapackage, aver yheavypackagesoyouneedt ochoose.I tst hem orus.
Me:Youar ebei ngunf airr ightnow.
Her:Doyouknowwhatunf ai ris?!Youhavi ngachi ldwi thanot herwoman!Awomanyoucan' t
stayawayf r
om!
Me:Doyouwi shIdi dn' thavehi m?Honest ly?
Her:Idobecausei fyoudi dn' thavehi m Chant el l
ewoul dn'tbeapar tofourl ives.
Wowt hi swasj ustangerandhur tspeaki ngr i
ghtnowbecausePhumzawoul dn' twi sht hatmy
sondi dn' texist ,hei st hebestt hingt hathaseverhappenedt ome.Hei smyl i
ttl
eman.
Me:Bet weenyouandherIchooseyoubutbet weenmyki ds, Ican'tchoose.I fyouwantt owal k
outpl easedomeaf avour , l
eavemysonsbehi nd.
Her:Iam t heirmot her .
Me:Iam hi sf ather ,Ican' twal koutofhi sl i
fe.ThesamewayIcan' twal koutofoursons' l
ives.
Her:Wear edoneYandi saandIam t aki ngmyki dswi thme.
Me:Pl easel etst alkaboutt hi st omor rowmor ni ng, I
'llbet her efir
stt hingtomor rowmor ni ng
please.
Her:Youcan' tchangemymi nd.
Me:Butpl easedon' tleavel i
ket hat,pl easedon' tgo.Don' twal koutofmyl if
e, don' tdot hi st ous.
Her:I'llwai tfort omor rowbutIam l eavi ngassoonasyougether e.
Me:Thankyou.
Shedr oppedt hecal l
.Jesus!Ican' tlosemywi fe,Ican' tlosemyki ds.IwokeupQhawesowe
couldgohaveabat h.Af tershower i
ngIl otionedhi mf irstanddr essedhi mi nt henewcl othes
thatIboughthi m.Iappl i
edbodyl otionaswel lthengotdr essedi nt oasi mil
arout f
itasQhawe.I
packedourbagt henwewentt othel ounge, Mandl awasal readyeat i
ngsowej oinedhi m.If ed
Qhawef i
rstt henat et oo.Af tereat ingMandl awentf orashowersowewer ef orcedt owai tfor
him.
>>>>
Wewal kedi ntot hehospi talandwentt ot her ecept iont oaskf orDrDuToi t,ther ecept ioni stwas
reall
yhel pfulbecausehecal ledhi mt ot her ecept ionf orus.
Her:Hewi llbeher ei naf ewmi nut espl easesi tdown.
Us:Thankyou.
Wesatdownont hewai tingchai rs, t
het ensi onwasskyhi gh.Wehaven' tsaidawor dtoeach
othersi ncel astni ght .
"DrDuToi tt hosear et hemen" ,Il ookedupandmyeyesmetwi t
hawhi t etallmanwi thr edhai r
andbear d.IpokedMandl aandwebot hgotup.
Dr:DrDuToi ther e.
Hehel douthi shandandIshooki t.
Me:Yandi saher e.
Mandl a:AndMandl a.
Me:Andt hisi smyson, thepat i
ent '
sson.
Hesmi ledandgr eet edQhawe.
Dr:Thankyouf orcomi ngt oseemesosoon.
Me:Howi sshe?
Dr:Pleasecomet omyof ficesowecant alk.
Me:I sitthatbad?
Dr:Youonl ysi r,achi ldcan' theart his.
Ohshi t!Whatnow?
Me:Mandl apl easel ookaf terhi mf oraf ewmi nutes.
Henoddedandt ookQhawe' shand, Ifollowedaf tert her edhai rdoct ort ohisoffice.
.
Him:Pl easet akeaseat .
Isatdownandpl acedmyhandsont her estingar msoft hechai r
.
Him:Whati syourr elationshi pwi thMi ssAdams?
Me:Weshar eason.
Him:Hmmm Iwant edaver ycl osef ami lyr elativebutsi nceyouher eImi ghtaswel ltellyou.
Me:I ssheokay?
Him:I tdependsonyourdef i
nitionofokay.If oundMi ssAdamsnextt oar obotonmywayt o
wor konMondaymor ning, shewasl yingt her eunconsci ous.Atf irstIthoughtshewaspar tof
thesel ocalgangsandt heywer eusi ngherasbai ttohi jackme, Iam sur eyouhavehear dof
howt hesepeopl edoi tthesedays.( Inodded)AndIwasn' tgoi ngt ostopbecauseIf ear edf or
myl if
ebutsomet hingt ol dmet ost opandhaveal ookather .Shewasi nashor tskirtandher
topwast or n, shehadbl ackandbl uebr uisesonherbodyasi fshewasmanhandl ed.WhenI
reali
sedt hatshewasunconsci ousIdeci dedt otakeherwi thmeandt r eathersi nceIam a
doctormysel f.Whenwegother eIhookedhert ot hemachi nesbecauseherpul sewasf ai
ntand
shewasi nacommaf or3days, att hatmomentIwasr unni ngt estsonherandi tdidn'tl ook
good.Shewasandst i
llisdehydr ated, herst omachi sempt yandt heamountofdr ugsIf oundi n
herbodywer eenought oki l
l her.
Igotup.Icoul dn' tbelievehowshecoul dbesosel fish,dr ugs? !Iwoul dunder st
andherr unni ng
awaybutdr ugs?Ha. aIcoul dn'tbel i
eveIr i
skedmymar riagef orthisshi t.
Me:Idon' twantt oheart his.
Him:Si rpl easesi tdown.
Me:Icameher et hinkingshewassi ckori nsomesor toft roubl ebutshedi dthi
st oher self.
Him:Shewasdr uggedandmol est ed.
Iclosedmyeyes, how?Whyher ?Whatwasshedoi ngi nJohannesbur gi nthefirstpl ace?
Him:Si rar eyouokay?
Iopenedmyeyesandl ookedathi mt hennoddedandsatdown.
Him:WhenshewokeuponThur sdayshecoul dn'tt alkorr eactt oanyt hing.Apr of essional
psychol ogi stsai ditwasbecauseshewentt hroughat raumat i
cexper iencesowehadt otreat
herfort hat .OnFr idaymor ningshewokeupf eelingbet terbutshest il
l refusestot alk, shej ust
wroteherdet ai l
sonapaperwhenweaskedherabouther sel fandwhowecoul dcont actt o
comef orher .Anyf urtherquest i
ons, theanswer sshewr oteonaboar dt hatwehadt ogether .I
t
wast heonl ywayofcommuni cat ingwi t
hher .
Me:Howdi dshegett oJohannesbur g?
Him:Shecan' tr emember , allshedoesi scr y.Sher efusedt ot alkt othepol i
ceandsher efuses
totalkt othepsychol ogi st,shewontt alkoreat .
Thisisal lmyf aul tGod!
Me:Wher eisshe?
Him:Pl easebegent lewi thher .
Me:Justt ellmewher eshei s!
Him:I '
lltakeyout oher .
Wegotupf rom ourseat satt hesamet i
meandheshowedmet oherr oom/ ward.Wewal kedi n
andf oundhersl eepi ng, maybe.
Him:Don' tbeangr yather ,don' tshoutather .
Inodded.
Him:I '
llleavet hetwoofyout oget her.
AgainInodded, hewal kedoutl eavingust oget her .Itookadeepbr eatht henwal kedt owardst he
bed,tot hesi deshewasf acing.Ikneel eddownbef oreherandl ookedather ,whatdi dIdot o
youCha?I twasqui tevi sibl
et hatshel ostwei ght ,alotofwei ght .Herhandswer eski nny,her
cheekboneswer eoutandsowashercol l
arbone.Ipl acedmyhandonhershoul derandgent l
y
caressedi t
, hereyesshotopen.Ist oppedandr emovedmyhand.
Me:Iam sosor r
yCha.
Tearsf ellfrom hereyesandIwi pedt hem.
Me:Thedoct ortoldmewhathappened, i
twasn' tyourf ault.
Shecl osedhereyest henopenedt hem agai n,maybeshecoul dn' tbelievet hatIwasher e.She
str
etchedoutherhand, Itooki tandki ssedi t.Thenwi pedhert ear s.
Me:Iam her eCha, Ihavecomet otakeyouhome.
Thel astt i
meshewasi nt hisposi tionget tingherbackt ohernor malsel fwashar d,shehat ed
herself ,shej ustlosther selfcompl etely,wel ostour selves.Inevergott ofindmysel fagain,
noneofusdi d.Itwasadi ff
icul tti
me.
Me:I t'
sme, pl easesaysomet hing.Si tup.
Ihelpedherup.
Me:CanIsi tdownnextt oyou?
Sheshookherhead.
Me:OkayIwont ,Qhawei sher e.Woul dyoul iket oseehi m?
Shesmi ledandnodded.
Me:Ndi yeza.
Iwalkedoutandwentt ot her ecept ionbecauset hat '
swher eIl eftt hem.
Mandl a:Howi sshe?
Me:Pl easegethersomet hingt oeat ,
li
qui df oodt hough.Cust ar d, ult
ramel ,yogurtthosesor t
sof
foodandor angej ui ce.
Mandl a:I ssheokay?
Me:Shewi llbe, shewant stoseehi m.Mommywant stoseeyou.
Qhawe:Mommy?Her e?
Me:Yesshei s.Pleasecomebackassoonasyoucan.
Henoddedandwal kedout .ItookQhawet ohi smot her,hesmi ledandshowedhi slasttooth
whenhesawher .
Him:Mommy!
Her:Baby. .
.
Iclosedmyeyes, ThankGod! !Iopenedt henagai nandputQhaweonherl ap.
Him:Mommyl ovesQhawe?
Her:Mommyl ovesQhawe.
Him:Qhawel ovesmommybutmommymustbr ushhert eeth.
Shel aughedandhuggedhi m.
Her:IthoughtIwoul dneverseeyouagai n.
Me:WhathappenedCha?
Her:Mommyl ovesyousomuch, Iloveyou.
Him:Il oveyou.
Her:Gi vemommyaki ss.
Theybabyki ssedandQhawegi ggled, atleasthehadhi ssmi leback.Andshegothervoi ce
back.
Me:Don' tyouwantt ot alktome?I fyoust illmadatmeIam sor ry.
Shecl osedhereyesandki ssedQhawe' sf oreheadmur mur i
ng" Iloveyou" .Owwel lItookachai r
andsatdownandjustwatchedt
hem.It
ookoutmyphoneandt
extedPhumza:"
Qhawejustgot
hissmi
leback,
Iam cominghome.Iwantt
oputasmil
ebackonyourf
ace,Il
oveyouandIam
sorr
y"

59
Phumza:
Af t
err eadi ngt hemessageIt hr ewt hephoneont hebedt hent ookoutabagandst arted
throwi ngi nmycl othes.Iwasr eal lyl eavi ngt hisman, Icoul dn' tst ayher eanyl ongert hat
Chant ellei sbackandYandi sai sdr oppi ngever yt hingt ogot oher .Makesmewonderwhatt ype
ofr elat i
onshi ptheyhad, whydi dt heybr eakup?Het oldmet hathedoesn' t/didn' tloveherbut
whyi shej umpi ngt osaveher ?St upi dPhumi youbel ievedhi m!Goshofcoshel ovesher
other wi sehewoul dn' tbet her ewi thher ,hewoul dbeher eathomewi thyouandhi skids.
.
.
Chant elle:
(someoneaskedf orChant elle'spoi ntofvi ew)
Me:Whyar eyouher eYandi sa?
Ifinallyaskedaf ter10mi nut esofawkwar dsilence.Hel ookedatmewi thhi spi tifuleyes, Idi dn'
t
wanthi spi ty.Idi dn'twantanyone' spi ty.Hepul ledhi schai rcl oserandt ookQhawef rom me
buthest r etchedouthi shandsf ormesohepl acedhi m backonmypai nf ult highs, mywhol e
bodyhur tdespi tet hemedi cationt heyputmeunder .Yandi sapul ledmyhandi nt ohis, befor ehe
coul dki ssi tIpul l
edi tback.
Me:Don' tYandi sapl ease. .
Myvoi cecameoutasacr yandt ear st rembl eddownmycheeksi mmedi ately, GodknowsI
hat edcr yingi nf rontofhi m butIcoul dn' thelpi t.Ever ythingt hatIhavebeent hrought hesepast
coupl eofweeksj ustcamebackt omeandhi tmer eal l
yhar d, li
fej ustwasn' twor thliving
anymor e.Idon' tknowwhyIdi dn' tdi e, Idon' tknowwhyt hatst upiddoct orDuToi thadt osave
me.Qhawet urnedt of acemydi rect iont henwi pedmyt ear s,evenhepi t
iedme.GodIam t he
onemeantt owi pehi st earsnott heot herwayar ound.
Qhawe:Mommyi scr yi ng?
Me:Nobabymommyi sn'tcr ying, shei sgl adt oseeherbaby.
Hesmi l
edandwr appedhi st i
nyar msar oundmyneck.
Me:Car ef ulbaby.
Yandi :Mommyi st i
r edboygi veherabr eak, comet odaddy.
Heshookhi shead, Yandi sal ookedatmeandInodded.Hesatbackonhi schai randl ookedat
me.
Him:Cha
Me:Idon' twantyourpi tyYandi sa.
Him:Thi si snotpi tyCha, Icar eaboutyousodeepl y.Iam her ebecauseIcar eandIwantt obe
yourshoul dert oleanon, yourr ock.
Me:Youcan' t
,youar enotmyr ockanymor eYandi sa.Youst oppedbei ngt hatwhenyoumar ried
her .
Itst r
ue!
Him:Butpl easel etmebeher ef oryou.
Ishookmyhead.
Me:Iam sur eyouar et i
redoft his, somet hingbadhappenst omeandyouhavet ocome
runni ngt or escuet hepoorChant el le.Idon' twantt hatanymor e, Idon' twantyout ost ress
your sel faboutme. .t his.Rememberhowdi sgust edyouwer ebymewhent hisf irsthappened?
Him:Iwasn' tdisgust edbyyouCha, whatevergaveyout hati mpr ession?
Me:Youst artedcheat ingonme, cur singatme.Youbasi cal lyt reatedmel ikeIdeser vedi t
.
Somet imeshewasni ce, gent l
e, lovi ngandcar ing.Somet imeshet reatedmel ikeaqueen, the
queenofhi shear tt hat 'swhatheusedt ocal lme, hisr uby-t hemostbeaut if
ul ,wor t
hyand
preci ousst onehecoul deverhol d.Iwashi sr uby, Iwaspr eci oust ohi m especi allythel astf ew
mont hsbef orehi sweddi ng.Wewer ehappy, i
nsepar able, atleastIt houghtwewer e.Hewas
reallyst ar tingt ocleanof fhisactandIwasdumbenought ot hinki twasal lforme.
Him:That 'snotent irelyt rue.
Iexhal edl oudlyt henyawned, Iwasj ustsoexhaust ed.Physi callyandemot i
onal l
y, Yandisa
exhaust edmeemot i
onal ly.
Him:Howdi dyougether e?Howdi dyouendupt aki ngdr ugs?
Ilookedupi nat temptt ohol dbackmyt ear s,Ihavebeent ryingt obl ockoutal lthoset houghts
sincet hedayIwokeup.Thi nki ngaboutt hem mademef eelsodi rtyandcheap.
Him:Pl easest opcr yingCha.I tsuckst hatIcan' tevencomf ortyou.
Iwi pedt hecor nerofmyeyesast ear sslidedown.
Me:Canwenott alkaboutt his, If eelsodi rty.
Him:Youdon' thavet of eel dirt yar oundmeCha, rememberwhenwewer eher e?Di dn'tIstand
byyounomat terhowmuchyoupushedmeaway?Madeyouf eel loved, wor thyofbei ngloved?
Inodded.
Me:Unt il youst ar tedchangi ng.
Him:OhmyGodChai twasn' tbecauseofyouorwhathappenedt oyou.
Me:I tdi dn' tfeell iket hat .
Him:Iam sor ryChaokay?Ishoul dn'thavehur tyou, Ishoul dn'thavedoneal loft hoset hings.
Me:Yetyoust illdo?Your eall
yhur tmyf eel ingsYandi sa.
Him:I st hatwhyyour anaway?Youst artedusi ng?
Ishookmyhead.
Me:Idi dn' trunawayYandi sa, Iwasabduct ed. ..Iwasdr uggedandused.Iwassol df ormoney, I
was. .
Hiseyest ensedandat eart ri
ckl eddownhi sl efteye, hequi cklywi pedi tofft henl ookeddown.I
didn'tknowknowwhet herIshoul dcont i
nueornotbutIdeci dedt ocont i
nue.
Me:OnThur sdaymor ningIcheckedoutoft hel odge, Icoul dn'tbet her eanyl ongerbecauseof
youknowwhat .Imadei ttoDur bansaf elybyt axi, theguydr oppedmeof fatsomer obotand
showedmewher eIcoul dgetat axitot heai rpor t.But ...Imesseduphi sdi rect ionsandher eI
wasl osti nt hisbi gci tyIhappent oknownot hingabout ,
Ist art
edpani ckingandaski ngar ound.
Thi ssweetguyandhi sgi rlf
riendwer eki ndenought oshowmet ot het axis,west artedwal king
andwemadeconvo.Theywer esweetorsoIt hought , IthoughtIcoul dt rustt hem Yandi sa.(he
alwayssai dIt rust edeasi ly)Theguyof feredt ocar rymybagf ormebecauseIwasst ruggling,
wegott oacabandt heguyspoket ot hedr iver.Youknowconvi ncehi mt ot akemet othe
airpor tandwhi let heyspoket hegi rlshowedmet hi ssweetper fume, itsmel tgr eatsoIdeci ded
tot ryit.Idon' tknowwhathappenedaf t
ert hat ,Irememberwaki ngupi naf astcar .Iwasnumb
andf eel ingwei rd, whenIl ookedar oundt hecarIr ecogni zet hegi rl,boyf ri
endandt hedr i
ver.I
askedt hem wher ewewer egoi ng, theyj ustl ookedatmel ikeIwasst upi d.Nor eact ionorwhat
soever ,IknewIwasi nt roubl e.WhenIt riedt omovemyl i
mbsIcoul dn't,Iwasj ustpar al
yzed
andexhaust ed.If ell asleepagai n, nextt hingyouknowIam waki ngupt ot hisf il
thyf l
atwi t
ht wo
spongesanddi rtybl anket s.Myhandswer et iedandsower emyl egs, Irememberl ooking
aroundandseei ngt hisbeaut ifulyounggi rlint hecor nercr yingoutf orhermot her.Maybeshe
wasar ound10ofage.Whent hey( twowomanandaguy, hewascar ryingagun)br oughtus
foodwewer eunt iedbutIwasst i
lltir
ed, Iwasexhaust edbutImanagedt ogetupandwal ked
overt ot hel i
ttl
egi rl.Isatdownnextt oherandi nt roducedmysel ft henaskedherwhatwas
goingon, wher ewewer ebutshedi dn'tdar esayawor dunt i
ltheguysl eft.Shej ustsai dshe
wasscar ed, that 'sal l.Af tersomet i
me, maybe30mi nut esl aterat allguywal kedi nandmade
comment saboutmyunt ouchedf ood.Iaskedhi m wher eIwasandwhatwast hepl anaboutus,
Itriedt of ighthi m butheshovedmet ot hecor nerandhej ustgr abbedt hegi rlbyherar m and
l
ef tther oom wi thher .Shecamebackaf t
erahourorsowi thbl oodyl egs, shewasshaki ng,
crying, scar ed.Iwasscar edt oo, wewer et rapped.Shecol lapsedonmyl egsandIr eachedout
forher ,shecr i
edaboutpai nbet weenherl egsandIj ustknewi t.Theyr apedherYandi sa,a
fri
cken10yearol d!( het ookmyhandsandsatnextt omeont hebed, comf or tingme.Qhawe
wassl eepi ngbyt henwi thhi sheadonmyl ap)af teraf ewmi nut est heyt hr ewi nwat erandI
cleanedheruppr omi singhert hatIwasgoi ngt ogetusoutoft hatdump.ButIcoul dn't,I
coul dn' t..
.If ailedt hatl i
t t
legi rl.Theywer et oost rongf orme, ther ewasnowayout .Theycal l
ed
met roubl esomeandwhenIr ef usedt ocooper atet heyst ar t
edi nject ingmewi thsomet hi
ngt o
makemecompl etelypar alyzed, mymi ndwasn' tfunct ioningwel l.Ij ustbecamedumb.
Him:Youdi dn'tf ai lherbabe, itwasn' ti nyourpower .
Me:Di ff erentmen. ..pai dt o..t
o.r apemeever ydayandni ght.
Iletoutal l myt earsandhehel dmet ighter .
Me:If eelsodi rtyandIwi llunder stand. ..
Him:Heyheyheybabel ookatme( hecuppedmyf aceandf orcedmet ol ookathi m, hiseyes
wer ewat er y)youar eoutoft her enow.Noonewi lleverhur tyouagai n,Iwi l
lmakesur eofi t.It'
s
goingt obef i
nebabewewi llgett hrought his,toget herl i
kebef or e.
Hewi pedmyt earsandki ssedmyf orehead.
Me:Icanst il
lfeelt heirdisgust ingsweatdr ippingonmybody, Ijustwantt odi e.
Him:HeyChadon' tsayt hat, don' twisht hewor stuponyour self.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Her :Whati swor set hanwhatIhavebeent hroughf orthepast2mont hs?
Ididn'tanswert othatIj ustki ssedt hesi deofherheadandr ockedherbackandf orthont he
bed.Idi dn' thaveananswert ot hatquest i
on.Chant ell
ewassl owl ydr ifti
ngof ftosleepi nmy
armswhenMandl awal kedi nwi thapl asticbagf rom pi cknpay.Hi sf acialexpr essionwent
from smi leyt owor ri
edandsad.
Him:Howar eisshe?
Me:Shewi llbeokay, Iknowshei sst rongert hant his.
Him:Whathappened?
Me:I 'l
l t
el lyoul ater,shehast oeat .
Henoddedandhandedmet hepl astic.
Me:Chayouhavet oeatf ir
st .
Iwokeherupandshej ustst aredatmebl ankl y.
Me:I tsme, Yandi sa.(shenodded)pl easet akeQhawe.
Refer ri
ngt oMandl a, henoddedandt ookhi m af terput tingthepl asticont hechai r.
Him:I 'llwat chhi m.
Me:Thanks.
Hewal kedoutwi t
hhi m andIsatherupst raightt hent ookj uicef rom t hepl ast i
c.Iopenedi tand
tookast rawaswel landhel pedherdr inkf rom t hebot tle.
Me:Wewi llgett hrought hisbabe, youar est r
ongert hant his.
Iputt hej uicedownandopenedat ubofyoghur tt henf edhersl owl yt i
llshewant editnomor e.I
gavehert hej uiceandshedr anki t.
Me:Howdi dyougett hebr ui ses?Whathappened?
Her :Ibiteacl ientwhenhet r i
edt oshovehi sdi cki nmymout h.
Ismi led, Iknowi twasn' treal lysomet hingt osmi leoverbutIadmi r
edherbr aver y.It
swhatgot
heroutoft hatpl ace.
Me:Andhebeatyou?
Her :Andmy" owner s",t
heycal l
edmeawhol elotofnamesi ncludi ngusel ess, unattract i
veand
skinnybecauseIr efusedt oeat .Adr uggi ebutt heywer et heoneswhodi dt histome.
Me:Heyyouar estillthemostbeaut i
f ulwomanIhaveeverseen( aftermywi feof cos)youar e
stil
lmyr uby, beaut if
ulandpr eci ous, youst il
lwor thmor ethangol d.Thosemendon' tknowwhat
theywer et alkingabout .Andi tsnotl ikewecan' tfixyourwei ght,wecanandwewi ll
.(shef aked
asmi l
e)Whathappenedt ot hel ittl
egi rl?
Her :Idon' tknow, theybr oughti nmor egi rl
sovert heweekendsandt heywer emeantt omove
ust hedayt heyabandonedmet here.
Inodded.
Me:Doyouknowwher eyouwer ehel dorwher etheywer emovi ngyou?
Sheshookherhead.
Her :Iam sor ry.Theyneveral l
owedust ogoout sidebesi desIwasal wayshi ghandi nt oxicated
toknowwhatwasr eal l
ygoi ngonar oundme.Outoft hecount ry, Idon' tknowwher etoexact ly.
Shit!Icur sedundermybr eat h.I fIcoul dgetmyhandsonwhoeverhur ther, he/shewasgoi ng
topayf orwhathe/ sheputhert hrough.
Me:I tsokay.
Her :WhencanIgohome?Idon' twantt obeher eanyl onger .
Me:Youst illhavet otalkt ot hepol ice.
Shenodded.
Her :You' llbebymysi der ight?
Inodded.
Me:Andt henI '
lltalktoDrDuToi taboutr eal isingyout oday, nowbecausewer eall
yhavet o
drivebackhome.
Shecl osedhereyes.
Her :Thankyou.
Myphoner ang, dist
ur bingus.
Her :Itmustbeyourwi f
e, t
akei t.
Ilookedathert hengavehert wobananas.
Me:Eatt hatsol ong.
Itookt hephoneoutofmypocketj eansandt ookt hecal l.
.
Me:Mama
Her :Nyanya!YeYandi sadoyour eal i
sewhatyouhavedone? !
Me:WhathaveIdone?
Her :Ar eyour eal l
ygoi ngt or i
skyourmar riagef ort hatbi mbo? !
Me:Ohwow.
IfsheknewwhatChawasgoi ngt hroughr ightnowshewoul dn'tbecal l
inghernames.
Her :Youneedt ocomehomeYandi sa!Ri ghtnow!
Me:What '
sgoi ngon?
Her :Shei sl eavi ng,herbagsar epackedandshei sl eavi ng.
Me:What ?
Ihear dher , Ijustcoul dn' tbelievei t.Iaskedhert owai tandshepr omi sedmet hatshewas
goingt owai tt i
lltomor r
ow.
Her :Yoursi ster'sweddi ngi snextmont h,weshoul dbepr epar i
ngf oritnotr unni ngaf teryou
becauseyouar ecaughtbet weent wowomen.Weser iousl ydon' tneedyourdr amaYandi sa!
Cleanupyouractman!Youar enotal i
ttl
eboyanymor e!Youar eahusbandandaf ather,act
l
ikei t!
Me:Yesma.
Iwasi nnof ight i
ngmood.Idr oppedt hecal landl ookedatCha, IwishIcoul ddosomet hi
ngt o
bringj ust i
cef orherbutwehonest l
yhadnot ime.Iwant edt ogetbackhomeandst opPhumi
from l eaving.
Me:Wehavet ogo, I'
llgogetyourdoct orsoIcant alkt ohi m aboutdi schar gingyou.
Shenodded.
.
.
Phumza:
MakaYandi :Sitdownsi siplease, calm downYandi sai scomi ng.
Me:Ican' tmama, Ijust..Ican' thedoesn' tl oveme!Heneverdi dandheneverwi l
l.
Mama:Hedoesbaby.
Me:I tsfunnyhowal lofyout hi nkhel ovesmebuthei sn' ther e,her anaf teranot herwoman!
Mama:Hi sson' smot herbaby, yousawhowmi serablet hatyoungboywas.
Att hatmomentIdi dn'tcar eaboutt hat,Ijustwant edt ogoawayf r
om her e.Myhear thurt.
Mama:Youar eoverr e-act i
ngPhumza, yourhusbandhasn' tgivenyouanyr easont odoubthi s
l
ovef oryou.
Me:I fthisi sn'tr easonenough. ..
MakaYandi :Yandi sawoul dn' tgot hereunl essi t
sr eallyi mpor tant,unlessshei sint roubleand
sheneedshel p.
Whataboutus?Ar en'twei ntroubl e?WhymustIcar eaboutanot herwoman, hisex? !Thisis
totalbul lshi t!Ifoldedmyar msi nf rontofmychestandpout ed.
Mama:Wi llyoual waysr unawaywhent hingsgett ough?Thi si smar riagent ombazanayou
don' tjustupandl eavej ustbecausei t
sget tingt ooheat edf oryou.Yousi tdownandf ightfor
yourmar riage, akukaphel inonyakal oandyoual readywantt owal koutoverwhat ?Whatyou
thinkmi ghtbegoi ngon?Becauseyout hinkhemi ghtleaveyou?Youdon' tknowt hat.Yandisa
mi ghtnotbei nl ovewi t
ht hatwoman, hel ovesyou!
Me:Idon' texpectyout ounder standbecauseyouar enott heonesgoi ngt hr ought hi
s.
MakaYandi :Hei scomi ngbackt oyou, youar ehi swi f
e.Chant ell
eishi sbabymama, that '
sthe
nameyouuset hesedaysr ight?Shei shi spastandt hat'swhatshewi llalwaysbe, hisbaby
mamaandpast .
Mama:Youdon' tjustwal koutofyourmar r
iagebabyatl eastwai tforhi m, hearwhathehast o
say.
Them:Pl ease.
Inoddedandsatdownont hecouch, theyexhal edloudl y.
Me:I '
llwai tf orhi m.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Afterget ti
ngChant ellenewandcl eancl othesIr eturnedt ot hehospi tal.Whi l
eshechangedi nt
o
them Isi gnedherdi schar gef or ms, herdoct orallowedust ot akeherhomei nonecondi ti
on, we
l
ookaf terherandmakesur ethatshedoesn' tcomei ncont actwi t
hdr ugs.That '
st wocondi t
ions
ri
ght ?Inoddedandt hankedt hedoct or .
Me:Ar eyour eady?
Her:Yeah.
Istretchedoutmyhandf orher ,shet ooki tandIpul l
edhert omet henwewal kedout .Wewent
outsidet ot hecarandgoton, Mandl adr oveust othehot elforourst ufft henwedr ovebackt o
Capet own.
.
.
Phumza:
Iwokeupt oanempt ybed, Isatupandt ookmyphonef rom t hesidet able.Iswi pedt ounl ockit,
i
twas6i nt hemor ningandYandi sawasst il
lnotback.Hesai dhewoul dbehomef irstthing
tomor rowmor ningandt hiswast omor row.Maybehewasn' tgoingback, maybehedi dn'tlove
meanymor e.Igotoutofbedanddi dt heusual ,bathedandf edtheki dst hencleanedt hehouse
thenwentt ot akeashower .Af tershower ingIwentt ot heki t
chent omakebr eakf ast.
"Mor ningbaby" ,mom sai dassheputont heket tl
e.
Me:Mor ningmama.
Her:Ishebackyet ?
Me:NomamaandIdon' twantt ot alkabouti torhi m anymor e.
Her:Hei sst illyourhusband.
Me:Thati sn' ther e.
"Hei sher enow" ,hesai dbehi ndus.It urnedt ol ookathi m, hewasl eani ngagai nstt heki tchen
wall.HowcomeIdi dn'thearhi m comei n?Inanot herlifetimeIwoul dhavej umpedi ntohi s
armsbutnoti nthisl ife.
Him:Mol omama.
Her:Mor ningbaby, I'
llgocheckont heki ds.
Shewal kedoutwi thoutmaki nghercupofcof fee.
Him:Iknowt hatyouar emadatme.
Iturnedar oundandcont i
nuedwi thwhatIwasdoi ng.
Him:Babe
Hest oodnextt omel eaningagai nstt hecupboar d.
Me:Hungr y?
Henodded, Idi shedupf orhi m andgavehi m apl ate.
Him:Thankyou.
Het ooki tandsatdownont hehi ghchai r.
Him:Iam gl adyoudi dn'tleaveyest erday.
Me:Doyoul oveher ?Pl easebehonestwi t
hme.
Hest oodupandt urnedmet of acehi m.
Him:Babe
Me:Tel lme, doyoust i
llhavef eelingsf orher ?
Ididn'twantt oknowbutIj ustwant edt oknowwher ehest oodwi thChant ell
e.
Him:PhumzaIl oveyouokay?Imar riedyou.
Me:Becauseyouwer ef orcedt oright ?
Him:Ichoset omakei twor kbecauseIf elli nl ovewi thyou.
Me:Youst illhaven' tanswer edmyquest ion.
Him:Howcanyouaskmet hat ?Il oveyou, youar emywi f
enother .Iwentt her etohel pbri
ng
myson' smot herhomenotbecauseIwant edt ost artsomet hingwi thher .Yeahsur eImi ght
havemadeami stakebackatt hel odgebutIl oveyouandIdon' twantt ol oseyou.
Me:Youmadeami stake?Whatki ndofmi st ake?
Him:Aaahbabe. .
.
Hewashedhi shandsandspr i
nkl edhi sf acewi thwat erfrom hishands.
Him:I t
snot hi ngi mpor t
antormaj orbabej onga. .
.
Me:Youhi di ngsomet hingf rom me.
Him:Wel lIsl eptwi t
h. .
.I twasami stakest handwasam Iwasn' tthi
nki ngst rai
ght .Ididn'
tmean
tomyl ove, Iam sosor ry.
Ifeltli
keIj ustgotst abbedst raightonmyhear tandt earsfellfr
om myeyesr ightaway.Icast ed
them awaywi thmyhandsi mmedi atel y.
Me:Wi thwho?
Him:Hababe. .
.
Hescr at chedt hebackofhi sear .
Me:Wi thwhoYandi sa? !Iwantt ohearyousayi t
!
Him:Chant elle.
Hesai di nal owvoi ce, Ialmostcoul dn' thearhi m.
Me:Fuckyou!
Ipunchedhi schestandheadedf ort hedoor , hegr abbedmyar m andpul ledmebackt ohim.He
wrappedhi sar msar oundme.
Me:LetgoofmeYandi sa!Letgoofme!
Iyelledbuthej usthel dmet ighter .
Him:BabeIam sor ry,Ir eall
ydon' tknowwhatgoti ntome.
Me:Pl easeYandi sa...Pl ease, pleasel etgoofmepl ease...
Him:Babeyoucan' tleavemepl ease, Ineedyou.
Me:YouneedChant ellenotme!
Igrabbedhi scupofcof feeandt hr ewi tonhi sback, hegr oanedandl etmegoi mmedi at
ely.
Him:GeezPhumza!
Het ookof fhi st -shirtasIr ant oourr oom, Igr abbedmyphoneanddi all
edLubanzi 'snumber .I
want edhi mt ohel pmegetawayf r om her e.Het ookt hecallimmedi ately.
.
Luba:Phumza
Me:Pl easehel pme!Pl ease!
Him:What '
sgoi ngon?Ar eyouokay?
Ther ewaswor ryi nhi svoi ce.
Me:Pl easej ustcomeandgetme.
Him:Wher ei sYandi sa?
"Areyour eal lygoi ngt or uni ntoanot herman' sar ms?Myf r
iend? "
,heaskedashewal kedin
throught hedoor .Hegr abbedt hephoneoutofmyhandsandendedt hecal l.
Him:Iam sor ryIknowIhur tyou.
Me:Youknow? !Youknow? !Youdon' tknowanyt hi
ngYandi sa!
Igrabbedmyal readypackedbagsandhegr abbedt hem outofmyhands.
Him:Youar enotgoi ngt oleavemePhumza!
Iemer gedf ort hedoorandhepushedmebackt henl ockedt hedoorandputt hekeyi nhis
pocket .
Me:Opent hi sdoorYandi sa!Mama!
Islappedhi schestmul tiplet imest il
l hehel dt hem.
Him:Youwontl eavemePhumi ,Imadeami st akeandIam apol ogizing.Iam sor rybabepl ease
don'tdot hispl ease.
Iyankedmyhandsoutofhi ssatdownbel owt hebedwi thmyhandsovermyeyes.
"Phumza?Baby?Yandi sawhat 'sgoi ngon? ",mom shout edfrom theot hersideoft hedoor.
Him:Not hingmamaPhumzaandI ..
.
Me:Hei sl yingmama!Hel ockedmei nher e!
Her:Didhehur tyou?
Him:Iwoul dneverhur tmywi femama, Il
oveher.Ijustwantt otal
ktoher.
Me:Idon'twantt ot al
ktoyou.Idon' twanttotal
kt ohim!
Him:Toughbecausewear egoi ngtositinhereti
llwer esol
vet hi
s.Imadeami st
akeandIam
apologi
zing.
Me:Youasshol e.
Him:Keept hem comi ng.
Hesatont heedgeoft hebed.
Her:Babyar eyouokay?
Me:No!Iwantt ogetoutofher e!
Her:Yandisapl easeopent hedoorsoIcanseet hatshei sfi
ne.
Him:IfIopent hedoorshewi l
lleaveme, Iam notgoingt odothat.Di
dIhurtyouPhumza?
Me:Emot ionally.
Him:Emot ional l
ymama, physicall
yIdidn't
.
Her:OkayI '
llwai therebutyoucan' tkeephereinthereforever.
Him:Ijustwanthert ocal
m downmamat henIwillopenthedoor .
Her:Okay.
Him:Iam sor r
y.

60
Yandi sa:
Idon'tknowwhatIwasdoi ng, Idon'tknowwhyIl ockedheri nher ewi t
hmeaf t
erbr eaki ngt he
mosthur tfulandhear tbreaki ngnewst oher .Icoul dn'tforcehert otalktomeort oforgiveme, I
j
ustwant edhert ocal m down.Iwant edust ot alk.Aknock, noabangcamet hrought hedoor .
"Yandi sandodayoucan' tkeepheri nther eagai nstherwi ll
"
Me:Fut sekLubanzi !Youal socan' tcomei nt omyhouset otellmewhatt odo.
"OhmyGodj ustgoLubanzi ,Yandi saandPhumzaar emar ri
ed.Theyhavet owor kont hei r
problemst oget her"
"Ican'tmama, sheaskedf orhel pandIam her et ohel p"
Him:Ther ear eki dsi nt hehousemanYandi sa?
Me:Thosear emyki dssof uckof f
!AndPhumzai smywi fe,ifIwantt olockherinher ewi t
hme
thenIwi l
lgladlydoso.Fuckof fwena!
Him:Phumzaar eyouokay?
Me:Fut sekmanLubanzi !Gett hefuckoutofmyhouseandl eavemywi fethefuckal one!Geez!
Him:Shecal l
edmef orhel p, Ican'tleaveher .
NxaIgotupandunl ockedt hedoorandi tflewopen, IpunchedLubanzionhi sjawcausi nghi m
tobacksl i
de.Howdar ehecomesi ntomybedr oom? !Phumzast oodupi mmedi atelyandcame
tothedoor .
Me:St andbackPhumza, Iwi lldeal wit
ht hisi diot.
Her :Whatar eyougoi ngt odot ohi m?
Me:Fut sekst andbackman!
Ishovedherbackt henIcl osedt hedoorandl ocked.Iputt hekeybacki nmypocket .Igr abbed
Lubanzibyhi st-shirtanddr aggedhi m out sidewi thmeki cking,whodoeshet hinkhei scomi ng
i
nt omyhouseandt ell
ingmet oletmywi fegowi thhi m?Uyandi qhelalo!Itossedhi m outoft he
frontdoor .
Him:Whatyouar edoi ngi scal l
edabuse!Youcan' tlockheri nthereman!
Me:Whoar eyout ot ellmewhatIcanandcannotdoi nmyhouse?Ohj ustbecauseIaskedyou
tolookaf t
erherf orawhi l
eyout hinkyoucanbudgei ntomyhouseandbangonmydoor ,go
i
nt omybedr oom?Whogaveyout her ight?!Di dshegi veyout her i
ght?!Areyouf uckingmywi f
e?
Hechuckl ed.
Him:Don' tbest upid!
Me:Ar eyouorar eyounotf uckingmywi fe? !Ihaveseenhowyoul ookather!Talkt oher ,"I
'
ll
teachyouhowt odr i
ve" ,"IcanaskLubanzit ohel pyou" ,"
thereareki dsinthehouse! ",fuckyou!
Whoseki dsar et hey?Ni noPhumzani yandinyel a!
Him:MnqunduwakhoYandi sa!
Igrabbedhi m byhi st -shirtandpunchedt heshi toutofhi m, onepunchaf t
eranot hertillhewas
ont hegr oundandPhumza' smot herwasscr eami ngf ormet ostop.Ispi tonhi sfacethengot
upandwenti nsi de, thatwi llt eachhi mt oneversetf ooti nmyhouseormybedr oom.Wher e
washi srespect ?Iunl ockedt hedoorandwal kedi nthenl ocked.Shest oodupandl ookedatme,
hereyeswer ebl oodr edandswol len.I thur ttoseeherl i
ket hisandknowi ngthatIwast he
reasonbehi ndherl ooki ngl iket his.Shewi pedhernosewi t
ht hebackofherhandt hensniffed.I
handedhermyt -
shi rt,shet ooki tandwi pedhernose.
.
.
Phumza:
Thet -shirtsmel tofcof feeandYandi sa,thesewer ebot hhi sscent sandt heysmel treall
ygood
againstmynose.Ial mostwant edt ohughi m andt ellhi mt hati t
sokay, itisallgood.NoIam
madathi m, hehur tme.Hebr okemyhear t
, hesl eptwi t
ht hatbi t
chChant ell
et henliedtome
abouti t.Andf ort hatIcannotf orgi vehim.Hel ookedathi shands, theywer ebloody.Whatdi d
youdoYandi sa? !Ihaveneverseenhi m soangr yandvi olent,onemi ghtt hinkhe/ sheknows
someonebuti nact ual realityhe/ shedoesn' t.If eltli
keIdi dn'tknowYandi saatal l
,Ithoughthe
woul dnevercheatonme, hepr omi sedbuthewentaheadandbr okethatpr omise.
Me:Pl easeopent hedoor .
Him:Soyoucangot oyourboyf ri
end? !
Me:Myboyf riend? !
Him:Lubanzi !Whydi dyoucal l him?
Me:Idon' toweyouanyexpl anat i
ons.
Him:Yousl eepi ngwi thhi m?
What ?
!
Me:Iam notl oosel ikeyou!
Hechuckl edandsatont hebed.
Me:Whatdi dyoudot ohi m?
Him:Iam yourhusband, nothi m!Hei sn'tyourconcer n!
Me:Iam al soyourwi fenother !Shei sn'tyourconcer n!
Him:Chant ellei sgoi ngt hroughar eall
yhar dt ime.
Me:SoIam meantt ounder standt hat?!Yousl eptwi thher !
Him:I tdidn' tmeananyt hing!
Me:Don' tl i
et ome!Youst i
llloveherdon' tyou?
Him:Thi si sr idiculous!Haven' tIanswer edt hatquest ion?
Her:No!
Him:Isai dnonj e!
Her:Youar el yingnj e!Justopent hisdamndoor !
Him:Youar enotgoi ngt oleavemer i
ght ?
Me:Youcan' taskt hatofme.
Him:ButPhumibabei twasami st ake, i
tdidn' tmeananyt hingbabe.
Me:Thenwhydi dyoudoi t?!Why?
Him:Idon' tknow.
Me:When?
Ididn'twantt oknowbutIt hinkIowedi ttomysel ftof indout ,maybei twoul dn'thurtsomuch.
Him:Phu. .
Me:Ni ni?!When? !
Him:Bef or eshedi sappear ed, It oldheri twasami st
akeandi tshouldn'thavehappened.It old
hert hatIhaveyouand. .
.
Me:Youhadme, notanymor e.
Him:Babepl easedon' t.
Me:Doyoul oveher ?
Him:Nott hisquest ionagai n!FuckPhumzaIt ol dyout hatIl oveyou!
Me:Di dyouenj oyi t?
Him:Whatki ndofquest ioni st hat ?
Me:Di dyouusepr ot ection?
Him:Yes.
Me:Di dyouenj oyi t?
Him:Fut sekPhumza!Fut sek!
Hewal kedi nt oourbat hroom l eavingmei nourr oom.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Iwashedmyhandsandf acet hent ookat owel andwi pedmyf ace.
Her :Whatdoyouwantf rom me?
Iturnedar oundt of aceher .
Me:Iwantyout ost aywi thme.Iwantyout of or givemeandgi vemeanot herchance.IknowI
havehur tyoubutIaskofyout ofor giveme, please.
Her :Youhur tmesot erri
bl y.
Me:IknowbabeandIam sor ry.
Her :Itwontundowhatyoudi d, youbr okemyt r ust ,whatwehad.
Me:Soyouar egoi ngt ol eaveme?Wher ear eyougoi ngt ogo?
Her :Anywher ebuther e!I'llgohome.
Me:Youcan' tgohomePhumza, pl ease.I'
llgi veyouspace, I
'l
lmoveout .Youcanl i
veher ewith
theki ds, theyneedt obecl oset ot heirdoct or.Cl oset ot heirfather,pl
easedon' tgo.Don'ttake
them away.
Her :Wher ewi llyougo?
Me:Tomom' shouse.
Shenodded.
Me:Soyou' llst ay?
Shewal kedoutandIf oll
owedaf terher ,shet ookoutabagandst artedpacki ngmycl othes.
Me:Iam sor ryPhumza.
Her :Di dyouenj oybei ngwi thher ?
Me:Notmor et hanIenj oybei ngwi thyou.
Her :Thenwhydi dyou?
Me:Idon' tknow.
Her :Idon' tknowi fIcanf or gi
veyouei t
her,Idon' tknowi fIcandot hat.Idon'tknowi fIcanst ay.
Inoddedandt ookoutacl eant -
shir tandwor ei tt henIunl ockedt hedoor .
Me:I 'l
l giveyouspacebutIwontl etyougo.Youar emywi f
eandIam yourhusband, Iloveyou
andyoul ovemet oo.Wecanst il
lmakei twor k.
Witht hatsai dIwal kedout ,Iwentt ot hekids' room.Phumza' smot herwasi ntheresingingt o
them, shehadabeaut if
ul voi cel i
keherdaught er.Shel ookedatmeasIst oodnextt oher .
Her :Ithel pst okeept hem cal m.
Me:Iam sor rymama.
Her :Wher eisshe?
Me:Packi ngmybag.
Her :Youl eavi ng?
Me:Soshecant hinkcl ear ly.
Her :Youdon' twal koutwhenyourmar ri
agei si nt rouble.
Me:I tsmeorhermamaandIcan' tletherl eavet hishouse, Ican'tl
ethergohome.
Her :Thi swassupposedt obeyourhomet oget her .
Me:I tsonl yf oraf ewdays, til
lshei sr eadyt of or giveme.
Shenodded.
Her :I'
llgi veyouspacet ot alkt oyoursons.
Me:Thankyou.
Shewal kedout .
Me:Heyboys, daddyi sgoi ngt omoveoutf oraf ewdaysbutIwi l
lcomeseeyouever yday.Your
mot herandIar egoi ngt hroughar ought i
me, Ihur ther ,Ibrokehert rust,Ibetrayedher.ButI
l
oveherandIl oveyousoIam goi ngt omakesur et hatIear nhert rustback, I
'l
lmakesur ethatI
movebacki nwi thyouguysandwecanbeaf ami l
yagai n.Treatmommywel lwhi l
edaddyi s
gone, behaveyour sel ves.
"Yourbagi sr eady"
Me:Thanks, boysdaddyhast ogonow.Il oveyou.
Ikissedt hem onebyonet henwal kedoutandt oourr oom, Phumzawassi t
ti
ngont hebedwi t
h
tearsr unningdownhercheeks.Ikneel eddownbef oreherandt ookherhands, shedidn'
thave
herr ingonanymor e.I twasont hebednextt oher ,Itooki tandl ookedupather .
Me:Whatdoest hismean?
Ihel doutt her ing.
Her :Itsover , Iwontst ayi nthisstupi dmar ri
age.
Me:St upi
d?Wow.
Her :Youar ef reet obewi t
hher ,Yandi sayoul oveher .Youonl ymar r
iedmebecauseofyour
father ,yourf ami l
y.Youl oveher .
Nodoubtaboutt hatbutIcoul dn'tadmi tthattoher .Ilovehert oo.MaybeIal soneededtimet o
think, clearmymi nd, myf eeli
ngsf orCha.For getaboutt hem.
Me:Idon' twantt obewi thher ,Iwantt obewi thyou.
Her :Youdon' tmeant hat .
Me:Idobabe.
Her :Justt akeyourbagandgo.
Me:Pl easeputyourr i
ngbackon.
Her :Youkeepi t,givei ttoher .
ShegotupandpushedmesoIsatonmybut t.Shewal kedout , tearsstungmyeyesbutIwasn' t
goingt ocr y.Iputt her ingonmypi nkief ingert hengotupandt ookt hebag, Iwenttoputi tin
thecar .Thenwentbacki ntopackmyshoesandwal kedout ,Igotont hecaranddr oveout.
.
.
Phumza:
Tear swor medoutofmyeyesasIwat chedhi m dr iveout .Ididn'twanthi mt ogobutIwant ed
himt o.Ilovehi m, Iwi shIdi dn'tsoi twoul dbeeasyf ormet ofor getabouthi m, getoverthepai n.
Mom wr appedherar m ar oundmyshoul derandbr ushedi t.
Her :Itsgoi ngt obeokaybaby, youcanwor kthr oughi t.
Me:Idon' tt hinksomama.Hesl eptwi thher ,
hesl eptwi t
hanot herwoman.
Her :I'm sor rybaby.
Me:Andnowhei sl eavi ngme, hei sgoi ngt oher .
Her :Don' tt hinkaboutt hatbaby, hel ovesyou.
Me:Thenwhysl eepwi t
hanot herwoman?Hi sex?
Her :Idon' tknowbaby.
Me:That '
swhatheal sosays.
Her :ComeI '
llmakeyouacupoft ear,itwi l
lhel pyoucal m down.
Ilookedather .
Her :Okayi twontbutyouhavet ocal m down, youcan' tbreastf eedl ikethat.
Inoddedandf ollowedaf terhert ot heki t
chen.
.
.
Yandi sa:
WhenIgothomeIpar kedt hengotof f
, It
ookadeepbr eat hthengotof fandwal kedi nwi
thmy
bags.Mom, Olwet huandZet huwer esi tt
ingint hel oungewat chi ngtv.WhenIwal kedintheyal l
turnedt olookatmet hendownatmybags.
Mom:Hmmm!
Irolledmyeyesandwentst raightt omyr oom, Iputt hebagsdownt hengotont hebedandf el
l
asleepi mmedi at ely.Iwasexhaust ed.
.
WhenIwokeupIf el tal otbet t
er,physi cal l
ybutemot ional lyIwasst il
ldrained.AndIdi dn'twant
tof acemymot heryet ,shewasj ustgoi ngt otel lmesomet hi
ngt hatIalr
eadyknow.Imessedup,
Iknowt hat !If orcedmysel ftogetoutofbed, Iwentt ot hebat hr oom andshower edthen
l
ot i
onedandgotdr essedi nshortsandavest .Af t
ert hatIwentt ot hekit
chen, Iwashungr y.I
foundZet hui nt her ecooki ng.
Me:Nomdade( sist er )
Her :Br other .
Itookoutagl assf rom t hecupboar dandpour edmysel fwat erfrom t hefri
dge.
Her :Whatdi dyoudo?
Me:Isl eptwi thChant elle.
Her:Wow!
Me:AndPhumzaknows, Itoldher .Ididn' tmeant ot ellherbuti t
sbet ternowt hatsheknows.
Her:Youar eanasshol e.
Me:That '
swhatshecal ledme, shegavemebackt her ing.
Iwentt ot hecer eal cupboar dandt ookoutCheer i
os, Ipour edt hem i ntoabowlt hentookmi l
k
andpour edi tthensatdownont heki tchenhi ghchai r.
Her:Wowt hat'
sbi g.
Me:Yeah.
Her:Whydi dyou?
Me:Idon' tknow, maybeIwant edt ofuckheratt hatt ime.I tf
el tri
ghtatt hattimeandIwasn' t
thi
nkingst raight, sher emi ndedmeofourf i
rsttimeandyouknowshegotnakedi nfrontofme.
Her:Wow!Chant elle!
Me:Whyar eyoushout i
ng?Wher eismom?
Her:Shewentt oyourhouse, wor dsaysyoul ockedPhumzaupandyoubeatupLubanzi .
Me:Idi d, Lubanzi hadnor ightgoi ngovert here.Bangi ngonmydoorandwal kingintomy
bedroom.Absol ut elynor ight!
Her:Hedeser vedi tthen.
Me:Thankyou!Ij ustaskedhi mt obePhumza' swheel sifsheneededt ogot ot hehospi t
alwhi le
shewaspr egnantngokuhet hinkshecanj ustwal kint omyhouseandt ellmeshi t!Hehadno
ri
ght!
Her:Yeah.
Me:Sohowar et hepr epar ationsgoi ng?Whenwi l
lhebeher e?
Shesmi l
ed.
Her:Hei sher e, i
nahot elwi thhi smot her .Theweddi ngpr epar ati
onsar ecomi ngoutper fectly,
youjusthavet ofindasui tandwal kmedownt heai sle.Youst il
lwal kingmedownt heaisle
ri
ght?
IhaveneverseenZet husoexci tedsoi twasgoodt oseei ngherl iket hatsoInodded.
Her:Thankyout hankyou!
ShehuggedmeandIl aughed.
Me:UOl wet hu?Uphi ?
Shebr oket heembr ace.
Her:Mandl a'
shouse.
Me:Shehasn' tsleptwi t
hhi mr i
ght ?
Her:Noshehasn' tandt hat'sanhonestanswer .Shewant sthatmoney.
Ismiled, that '
sgoodt oknow.Idi dn' twantmybabysi st obewi t
hMandl a,hewasmyboyandI
knewt het ypeofper sonhewas.
.
Mom wal kedi ntot heki tchenwhi l
ewewer est il
ltalki
ngandl aughi ng.Shedi dn'tsayanyt hing
butinsteadsl appedme, whatt hehel l
?!Zet hugaspedandsodi dI.
Mom:Youar eher ebusyl aughi ngwhenyourwi f
eisal lal onecr yi
ng!
Me:Whatshoul dIdo?Cr y?Ha. amamapl ease.
Mom:Youshoul dbet her ewi thherbeggi ngf orherf or giveness!
Me:Shedoesn' twantmenearher !Besi desIam amanyoucan' tt ellmehowt of i
xmymar r i
age.
Mom:Whydoesi tlookl i
keyoudon' tcar e?
Me:MamaIbeggedherenoughbutshet ookof fherr i
ng, Iam wai ti
ngf orhert ocalm down.
Mom:Shet ookof fherr ing? !Thi sisbi ggert hanIt hought .Doyour ealisewhatyouhavedone
Yandisa?8mont hsni tshat i
lebutyouar eal r
eadysl eepi ngar ound? !HayiYandi sa!
Me:Itwasami stakemama.
Shecl appedonceandsatdown.
Mom:Makemeacupofcof fee.
Igotupandmadeheracupofcof fee.
Me:Whatdi dshesay?
Mom:Shei sdet er mi nedonl eavingbutIbeggedhert ost ayt il
lZet hu'sweddi ngandt henwe
candealnal eyenu.Shet ookof fherr i
ng?Yoh!Your eal l
yhur tthepoorgi rl.
Me:Iknowmama.
Mom:Chant ell
ekodwaYandi saoutofal lpeople?
Me:Iknowmama, sowi l
lyouhelpmegetPhumzat oforgi
veme?
Shenodded.
Mom:Youar et ooyoungt ogetdi vorcedandyouhaven' tevenbeenmar ri
edforthatl
ong.And
ther
ear ekidsinvolvedapha.
Igaveherhercof fee.
Me:Thankyoumama.
Mom:Yourf atherwoul dbesodi sappoi nted.
Me:Youj usthavet or ubiti
ndon' tyou?
Mom:Hewoul dkil
l you.
Me:Iknow.I 'l
lgethert oforgi
veandt r
ustmeagai n.
Mom:Goodl uckshel ooksli
keat oughone.
Ismiled,yeahshei sat oughonebutIwasgoi ngtoearnbackhert rust.Ideci
dedtomake
myselfacupofcof feeaswel lthewentout side,Ir
oll
edabl untandsatdownt osmoke.Ijust
neededt othinkofawayt hatIwasgoi ngt omakePhumzaseet hatIregret
teddoingthatwit
h
Chantell
eandmybr ainfuncti
onedver ywel laf
terasmoke.

61
Yandi sa:
IcalledMandl aonmywayt othebaraski nghi mt opickupmysi st
er sthenIt ext
edPhumza
tel
linghert hatIwasgoi ngoutf ordr i
nks.Shet ext edmebackaski ngmet ocomehomebutI
toldhert hatI '
llseehert omor rowt henIputt hephonei nmypocket .Ijustwant edtogetdr unk
hey, therewasj ustal otgoi ngoni nmyl i
fe, Phumzaaski ngmet ochoose, medeci dingt oresign,
l
ettinggoofmyf eel
ingsf orChant el
le,lettinggoofQhawe.Howdi dIgether e?WhenIgott o
thebarIor deredawhol ebot t
leofAbsol ut, t
omet urning26!Andawhol elotofshitgoi ngoni n
myl i
fe!Ifoundaseati nt hecor nerandopenedt hebot t
le,Itookhugegul psofAbsol ut.Thi s
shitist heish!I t
sst rongi bibethakul andawo!Byt hetimeMandl a,Lubanzi ,Zethu,Olwet huand
Zethu' sfi
nance( Bucul eJukuj a)ar ri
vedIhadal readydr ankhal fthebot t
lesoIwasdr unkoutof
mymi nd.
Olwet hu:Iseet hepar tyhasal readyst artedf ort hebi rt
hdayboy!
Shet ookt hebot tleoutofmyhandsbutIgr abbedi tback.
Me:Don' tmesswi ththemanandhi svodka.( sheputherhandsupt henbackedaway)Whati s
hedoi nghere?
Luba:Iam sor ryfordisr espectingyourhousendodai twonthappenagai n.
Me:Youseeyou?YouIl ikeyou!I twillneverhappenagai nyougott hatri
ghtorIwi l
lkillyou!
Sbar iwami na!
Bucul e:Sbar iwam.
Weshookhands.
Me:Takecar eofmysi s, hurtherandIwi llcutof fyourbal l
s.
Idon' twanthert ocr ylikeChaorPhumi .
Bucul e:Iwi l
ldoso.
Ibowedmyheadandr aisedmybot tl
et hent ookagul p.
Zethu:Ar eyouokay?
Me:I tsmybi rthdaybabysi s!Keept hedr i
nkscomi ng!Bucul eispaying.
Hebowedhi sheadwi thasmi l
e.
Bucul e:Drinksonme.
IsentLubanzit ogetust wobot tlesofJackDani elsandwet ookshot saftershots.Zet hukept
l
ooki ngatmewi ththat" you'vehadenough"eyebutnoIhaven' tevenbegun.Mandl ar oll
edusa
bluntandwesmokedi twhi leBucul eor der edmor edrinks(thegoodst uff)
,Buculeeven
l
oosenedupabi t.Hewassmoki nganddr inkingl ikether estofus, wewer ewast edespeci all
y
meandhi m, Zet huwaspi ssedatusf orthat .
Zethu:It hinkyouhavehadenough, t
hebot hofyou.
Shesai dtakingourdr inks.
Me:Hadenough?Hadenough?Ihavej ustbegan!Theni ghthasj ustbegan!
Bucul e:Letst aket histoacl ub, theni ghti sst i
llyoungbabes!
Zethu:Theni ghti sst i
llyoung? !Theni ghti sstillyoung? !Ar eyoucr azy!
Bucul e:Wear ecel ebrat i
ngmybr otheri nl aw' sbirt
hdayandourweddi ngbabedon' tbeapar t
y
pooper !
Olwet hucoul dn'thel pbutl augh, sher est edherheadonmyshoul derandsnor edi mmedi atel
y.
Me:Cl ubi tis!
Bucul e:Woahwoahwoah!I fwear eal l drunkwhowi lltakeust otheclub?
Me:Zet hui snotdr unk.
Zethu:Iam cal li
ngal lofyouacab, wenaYandi sayouar eabadi nf l
uencet oBucul e.
Bucul el aughed.
Bucul e:Ihaveal wayswant edt odot hi s.
Zethu:What ?Bedr unk?
Lubabal o:Beyoungandcar ef ree.
Zethu:Al lthankst oyou!
Sheshovedmyhead.
Me:Ri ghtgi vemeal lthecr edit!Takemehome, wher eismyphone?
IremovedOl wet hu'sheadandsear chedmypocket s.
Me:Ri ght !Ther ei tisther e.Yoh20mi ssedcal l
s?!Ubhor eki l
elomf azi,whyar ewomenso
compl i
cat ed?Whydoyoucompl i
cateourl ives?Myl ifeiscompl i
cated!Itsbullshi t
!Myson, I
can' tseemyson!Whydon' twomenacceptourapol ogieswi t
houtaski ngformuch?
Zethu:Yandi sayouar edr unkandyoushoul dprobabl ycal lyourwi feback.
Me:Lowoakaf uninyanawam!Owam!
Ipoi ntedt omysel f
.
Zethu:That '
snott r
ueshei sjustupset .
Me:Upsetornotha. a!(Ishookmyi ndexf ingeronherf ace)Sheaskedmet ochoosebet ween
herandhi m!Anddoyouknowwhat ?!IchoosemysonbecauseIl ovehim andIam t heonl y
fatherhewi lleverhaveandIneedal lmysonscl osetome.Phumzadoesn' tgett hatt hereare
plent yofgoodwomenoutt here.Icangetmar r
iedagai nifshel eavesmebutIdon' twanthert o
l
eave, Idon' twanthert oleaveme.
Zethu:Youar er eallydr unk.
Me:Ichoosemyson.
Zethu:OkayIgeti t
,tellPhumzat hatbutonl ywhenyouar esober .Youcanbeaj erkkal okwena.
Me:MysonZet huhegotmet his, i
tsaysdad.HowcanIhur thi m?
Shet ookt hechai nandputi tinherpur set hennodded.
Zethu:Mandl aandLubanzipl easehel pmewi ththem, I
'l
lcomewi thOl wethu.
Bucul e:Kut heni njendi zobanj wangamadodababesukhona?( whywi l
lanothermanhel pme
whenyouar eher ebabe? )
Zethur olledhereyesandhel pedOl wet huupt henwewal kedoutoft hebar ,Itookabot tl
eof
JackDani elswi thme.Wet ookt hebackseatandZet hudr oveust oourhouses, shedr opped
meandOl wet huof fatmomst henl eftwi thBuchul e.Ipul ledt hebot tl
eIhadi nmyhandt omy
mout handt ookahugegul p,Ineedt oseemyson.Ineedt oapol ogizet oChant elleandt el
lher
nott ot ellhim aboutmebr eaki ngourr elationship.Af terput ti
ngOl wet hutobedIwal kedoutand
tookawal ktoChant ell
e'spl ace.
.
.
Phumza:
WhenIhear dacarout sideIgotupf rom t hecouchandl ookedoutt hewi ndow, oh.
Mom:I sithi m?
Me:Nomama, hei sn'tcomi ngback.Whati fhechooset hem?
Her :Youcan' tthi nkthatmybaby, yourf atherwi llfi
xthisassoonasheget sher e.
Irubbedmyhandsandl ookedout side.Whati fhedoesn' tcomeback?Whati fher eal l
yhat es
me?HechooseChant el l
eoverme, at i
nyvoi cesaysi nmyheadbutIshakei toff.
Me:Ihopesomama.
Het :Got obedbabyYandi sawi l
l comeback.Youhavet ogetr estmyl ove.
Shepul ledmet oourr oom, Igotont hebedandcl osedmyeyes.
.
.
Yandi sa:
WhenIgott oChant elle'
shouseIknockedont hedoort henwai t
edf orhertoopen.Sheopened
aftersomet i
me, itwasMr sA.
Me:Mr sA
Her :Areyoudr unk?
Me:Doyouwantadr i
nk?Yeaht akei t
.(Ishovedi tinherchest )Shantellei
sinherroom ri
ght?
Iletgooft hebot tl
eandi tsmashedont hef loor.
Me:Oopsydai sy!
Iwal kedi nandheadedt oChant elle'sroom.
Her :Youcan' tjustcomei ntomyhouse!Yandi sa!Getbackher e!
Tool ate!Iwal kedi ntoChant elle'sr oom wi thoutknocki ng,shescr eamedandsatupont hebed.
Tear strickleddownhercheeks, ohshi t!
Me:Iam sor ryIdi dn'tmeant ogi veyouaf r
ight .
Her :Getoutpl ease!Getout !
Itookst epst owar dst hebed.
Me:I tsonl yme, Yandi sa.
Isatont heedgeoft hebedandcuppedherf aceasgent l
easIcoul d, shewasshaking.Jeez
thesemenhavet opayf orwhatt heyhavedonet oher .
Me:Heyi tsme.Iwonthur tyou, Idi dn'tmeant ofrightenyou.
Shesl appedmyhands.
Her :No!St ayawayf r
om me!Pl easedon' ttouchmepl ease...
Shebegged.
Me:I tsmeCha, i
tsYandi sapl easeopenyoureyes.Pl easeIwonthur tyou.
Sheshookherhead.
Me:Pl easecomebackt omeChant ell
e, please.Iwonthur tyou.
Itookherhandandki ssedi t,hereyespoppedopen.
Me:Iwonthur tyou.
Her :Yandi sa?
Inoddedandhuggedher ,shehel dont omef ordearl if
e.
Me:Heyl ookatme, lookatme.
Shebr okeawayandl ookedatme.
Me:Youar eathome, youar esaf eokay?
Shenoddedandhuggedmet ight .
Her :Yousmel lofabr ewer y.
Shespokesof tl
yi nmyear .
Me:Iwasi nabar .
Her :Whatar eyoudoi ngher e?
Me:Iwant edt oseemysonandapol ogize, wher eishe?
Her :Mom sl eepswi thhi mf ornow, Ihavet roublesl eeping.
Me:Letgoofme.
Hequi cklyunwr appedherar msar oundme.
Me:Moveover ,I
'l
lsleephernextt oyou.
Her :Youcan' t.
Me:Iwontundr essandI '
llbeont opoft heduvet .
Shenoddedandsl eptonhersi de, lookingawayf rom me.Il aybehindherandputanar m over
her.
Her :Wontyourwi febeupset ?
Me:Shet hinksIam atmom' s.
Her :Whati fyourmom t ell
shert hatyouwer en' t
?
Me:Shewant st hismar riaget owor ksoshewont .
Her :Idon' twantt ogetyoui nt ot roubl eorhur tyourwi feanyf urther.
Me:Shhhgot osleep.
Her :Doyou?
Me:DoIwhat ?
Her :Wantyourmar r
iaget owor k?Doyouwanti tt o?
Me:Yeahldo.
Her :Thenwhyar eyouher eYandi sa?Whydoyoual waysleadmeon?
Me:I '
m notl eadi ngyouon.
Her:Youar e, youar ehereonmybedaf tert elli
ngmenumer oust imest ogetoveryou.Yousl ept
withmeYandi saandyout hr ewmeoutandont opoft hatyout ol
dmet omoveonbutyetyou
areher ewi t
hme.Howam Isupposedt ol etyougo?
Me:MaybeIdon' twantyout ol etmego.
Her:Youar emar ried.
Me:Iam mar r i
ed.
Her:Sowhatar eyousayi ngr eallyYandi sa?
Me:I '
m dr unkChant ell
ejustsl eep.
Her:Doyouknowwhatpeopl esayaboutdoi ngandsayi ngt hingswhenyoudr unk?Youmean
everything.
Ichuckledandki ssedhershoul dert hencl osedmyeyes.
Me:Sl eepChant el le.
.
Iwaswokenupbysomeoneshaki ngmeandshout i
ngmyname.Isl owl yopenedmyeyes,
woahwher eam I ?!Ijumpedof ft hebed.
Me:Whatar eyoudoi ngher e?
Iheldmyheadj eezmyhead.
Her:Youar ei nmyhouse.
Me:Shhh
Her:Hangover ?
Shegavemewat erandt wot abl ets, Idownedt hem.
Me:Thanks.Whendi fIgether e?How?
Her:Youwer edr unk, disrespect edmymot herandyougother el astni ght.Idon'tknowhow.
Thingsst artedcomi ngbacksl owl yj eezIsai dawhol elotofst uff,stuffIshoul dn'
thavesaid.
Me:Ser iously?
Gottapr etendl i
keIcan' tremember .
Her:Andyousai dawhol el otofst uff.
Me:Ihadal ott odr i
nk.
Her:ExcusesbutI 'l
lletyougetawaywi thi t.
Me:Yeahwher ei sQhawe?
Her:Eat i
ngi nt hel ounge, Ihavet ogetdr essedf orwor k.
Shewasst i
llinahowandIcoul dt ellthatshej ustgotoutoft heshower .
Me:CanIgetar idehomepl ease?Li ker i
ghtnowIst il
lhavet ohaveabat h.
Shenoddedandt ookherkeys, tossedt hem t omeandwewal kedoutofherr oom.Whenwe
walkedi ntot hel oungeQhawej umpedupandscr eamed" daddy!Daddy! "Ipickedhim up.
Me:Heyboy, howar eyou?
Him:Goodyoul ef tmel astni ght .
Me:I '
m sor ryboydaddywasi nahur r
y.
MrsA:Youdi srespect edmeandmyhomel astni ght .
Me:Iam sor ryMr sAi twillneverhappenagai n.
MrsA:What 'syourpl anwi thmyst epdaught er?
Me:What ?
MrsA:Youhear dme, what '
syourpl an?Whydi dyouspendt heni ghtwi thher ?
Me:Uhhh
Cha:Wewer ej ustl eaving.
MrsA:Wher ear eyougoi ngdr essedl iket hat ?
Cha:Dr oppinghi m of f,I
'l
lcomebackandgetdr essed.
MrsA:Don' tcomebackwi tht ear s.
Char oll
edhereyesandpul l
edmebymyar m andwewal kedout .
.
Igottowor kandcal ledPhumza, shet ookt hecal lalmosti mmedi ately.
Her:Yandi sawher ear eyou?
Me:Wor kyouknowt hatIwor kr ight ?
Her:Ithoughtyousai dyouar egoi ngt or esi gn.
Me:YeahbutIcan' tjuststopwor kingi mmedi ately,Iwil
lgi vet hem 3mont hsnot i
ceandIst i
ll
havet odr awupaf ormal resi gnat i
onl ettertohandi n.
Her:Okayar eyoucomi nghomet oday?
Me:YeahI 'llseeyouaf terwor k,ther eisameet i
nganyway.
Her:About ?
Me:Us, yourdadandmygr andf at herar eatmom' shouse.
Her:Wowokay.Sowher ewer eyoul astni ght ?
Me:It oldyout hatIwentf ordr i
nkswi thmyboysandsi sters.
Her:Why?It houghtwewer egoi ngt ot rytowor konus.
Me:Wewi ll,Iwascel ebr atingmybi rthday.
Her:Yourwhat ?OhmyGodIf or got .
Me:It houghtso, don'twor ryabouti t.
Her:Iam sosor ryIwi l
lmakei tupt oyou.
Me:Don' twor ryabouti t,Iunder st and.
Chant el
lewal kedi nwi tht wocof fees.
Me:Ihavet ogo.
Her:Iloveyou.
Me:Loveyout oomyl ove.
Idroppedt hecal l andt ookt hecof fee.
Me:Thankyou.
Cha:Howi st heheadache?
Me:Iam f eelingbet t
eral lthankst oyouandyourpi l
ls.
Her:Youwel come.
Ismi l
edandshesatdownandwecommencedwi thwor k.
.
Afteraver yl ongandt ir
ingdayatwor ki twasf inallyt i
mef ormet ogohome.Igotupand
packedmybag.
Me:Packupsi hambe.
Her:Okay.
Shepackedupandwewal kedoutoft heof f
ice.
Her:Yandi sacanIaskyousomet hing?
Me:I fit
snotaboutusorwhat everIsai dl astnight .
Her:Soyoucanr ememberwhatyousai dl astni ght?
Me:YeahbutIdon' twannat alkabouti t,youshoul djustmoveonandIam sor ryformisleading
you.
Her:Doyoul oveme?Doyouwi shweneverbr okeup?
Me:JeezChacanyoust op?Icheat edonmywi fewi thyoui sn'
tthatenough?
Her:Youar esel fisht hough.
Me:BecauseIl oveyout hat '
swhyIam sel fi
sh.Idon' twantyout omoveon, Ialwayslovedyou
Chai tsjustt hat ..
.Canwej ustdr opi t
?
Her:Butyouar emar riedYandi sa.
Me:IknowChaokay?Iwi shIdi dn' tgoal ongwi thdad' sideabutyoudi dn'twantust oget
mar r
iedwhenIwant edust o.
Her:Youwant edust ogetmar riedi ncour t.Iwant edawhi t
edr ess,myf ami l
yandf at
hert here.I
want edabi gweddi ng, yourf ami lyt oacceptme, welcomemel iketheywel comedher .
Me:Wecoul dhavehadal loft hataf ter .
Her:Yourf ami lywoul dneveracceptme, mor eespeci all
yaf terthat.Marryi
ngi nsecretto
preventt heirpl ans.
Me:Thendr opi tCha!I t
snouset alkingabouti tnowIwant edt obewi thyouandyoudi dn' tso
yi
yeke.
Her:Ididn' tsayIdi dn'twantt obewi thyou.
Me:Yousai dnowhenIpr oposed.
Her:Youwant edust ogetmar riedont hesamedayyou" proposed"therewasn' tevenar i
ng,
nothing.
Me:Wewer egoi ngt obuyr ings.
Her:Maybei fyouwer ehonestwi thme!Maybei fyout oldmet hatinthreemont hsyouar e
getti
ngmar ri
ed!
Me:Youwer egoi ngt ofreak!Youknowhowyouar e.
Her:ButIwoul dhavemar riedyoubecauseIdi dn' twantt oloseyoueither
.
Me:Wel lwedi dl oseeachot herandt hereisnot hingwecandoaboutt hatnowunlessyou
agreetobemysecondwi fe,Idon'tknowhowt hatshi tworksbutjeezIloveyouChaand...
Nevermi nd.
Her:Askmeagai n, askmeagai nYandi saandIwi llsayyes.
Me:Ar eyousur e?
Her:Ialsodon' tknowhowt hatwor ksbutIl oveyou, Iwanttobewi thyouandonlyyou.Iwant
tobeyourwi fe, yourMr sDl amini.
Me:I'l
laskyouagai nbutonl yifmyf ami l
yandwi feagr ee.
Her:Andi fshedoesn' t?Whati ftheydon' t
?
Me:Wel lthent her eisnot hingwecandowi t
houtt heirblessing.
Her:Soyouwi llletmego?You' llforgetaboutus?Agai n.
Ishruggedandopenedt hedr i
ver'sdoorofmycar .
Her:Yandisa.
Me:Chant ell
e.
Her:Iloveyou.
Me:Iloveyout oo, Iloveyouandal wayswi ll
.I'
lltalktoher .
Her:Don'trushi tpl ease,shej ustfoundoutaboutwhatwedi d.
Me:Iwont ,Ijustwantyout oknowt hatIloveyou.
Her:Iloveyou.
Me:Comeher e.
Iopenedmyar msf orherandshegotbet weent hem, weshar edawarm hug.Iki
ssedher
for
eheadbef or ebr eakingi toffandwewentoursepar ateways.

62
Phumza:
WhenIhear dahi scardr ivei nIgotupandwentt owel comehi m,Ihavebeenwai t
ingforhi
mto
comehomeal lday.Hepar kedt hengotof ft
hecar .
Him:TowhatdoIowet hi swar m wel come?
Me:Imi ssedyouandIam sor ryifor gotaboutyourbi rt
hday.
Him:Itsokaymyl ovedon' twor r
yaboutt hat.
Weshar edahugt henki ssed.
Him:Imi ssedyout oo.
Me:Sohowwaswor k?
Hecuppedmyf aceandki ssedmyf oreheadt henstaredintomyeyes.
Him:Wor kwaswor k.
Me:Ar eyouokay?
Him:Doyoul oveme?Doyour eall
yl oveme?
Iwrappedmyf inger sar oundhi swr istandst aredintohiseyes,theywer er
ed.
Me:Whatt ypeofquest i
oni st hat?
Him:Phumzapl easej ustanswerme.
Me:IdoYandi sa, Ir eal l
ydo.Whywoul dyouaskmesomet hingli
kethat?Don'tyouloveme?
Him:Idobabe.
Me:Doyou?Doyour eally?
Him:Heydon' tdot hat ,don' tcr yplease.
Hewi pedt hef al l
ingt ear s.
Him:Comeher e,ourf ami l
ieshavedoneenoughf orus.Theyki ndaforcedustomar ryeach
other
..
OhmyGodhei sgoi ngt obr eakupwi t
hme.Il etgoofhi swr i
stsandhepul l
edmet othe
backyard.Ourf ami l
ieswer ei nside.
Me:Yandi sapl easedon' tpl easeIwontbeabl etotakei t
,pl
ease.
Him:Heyst handwasam pl easedon' tdot hi
splease,don'tcry.
Me:Youar egoi ngt ot el
lmet hati t
sover ,thatyouloveher .
Him:Iwont ,sitdownpl ease.
Isatdown, hesatdownt ooandt ookmyhands.Heki ssedthem both.
Him:Il oveyoudon' tdoubtt hat ,Ijustwantust ot al kwi thoutourpar ent sint erfer i
ngi nour
busi ness, ourmar riage.Iwantust obeabl et owor kourpr obl emsout .Fi rstlyIwantt o
apol ogizef orwhatIdi dwi th..
Iputmyi ndexf ingeroverhi sl i
pssi lenci nghi m.
Me:Don' tsayhernamepl ease.
Him:ButIam sor r
yaboutt hati tshoul dn'thavehappened.IknowyoumadatmeandIdon' t
blameyou.IknowIhur tyouandbel ievemeIdi dn' tmeant ohur tyou, Ididn' t.Bel i
evemeIdi dn't,
Idon' tevenknowwhyIdi di t
.
Me:Canwest opt alkingaboutt hatpl ease?
Him:YeahbabeIj ustwantust ogooveri t.
Me:Okay.
Ipul l
edmyhandsoutofhi sandf ol dedmyar msi nf rontofmychest .
Him:CanIbehonestwi thyou?
Me:Sur e.
Pleasedon' tbr eakmyhear tagai npl ease.
Him:Whenyouaskedmet ochooseyout otallyt hrewmeof fthecl iff
, Ist ar t
edi magi nghowl ife
woul dbewi thoutyou.Howl i
fewoul dbewi thChant ellebecausesomet i
mesIf eell i
keshe
under st andsmebet t
ert hanyoudoandIunder st andherbet t
ert hananyone.AndIknewf ora
factt hatshewoul dacceptmyki dsunl ikeyouwho. .
.
Ouch!
Me:Obvi ousl yyouwer et oget herf ort hatmuchamountoft i
me.
Him:Pl easej ustl i
stent ome, (Isatback)i twaswr ongofmet ocompar eyout wobutal lofthi s
star t
edwhenIst artedseei ngandbei ngar oundheral lmostal lthet i
me.Somef orgot t
en
feelingsst ar tedt osur face.WhenIhadt oexpl aint oherhowyouandIgotmar ried,Ist arted
doubt ingourl oveandcompar i
ngi tt owhatIhadwi thher .Idi dn'taskyououtl ikeIaskedher
out ,wedi dn' tgetachancet ogett oknoweachot herbef or eent eringi nt omar ri
age.Andnowwe,
okayIki ndaf eelt rapped, weconsi stent lyhavet ot hi nkandpl easeourpar ent s.Thewayt hatwe
goti ntot hismar riage, yesIdol oveyoubutt her ei st hist hingt hatyouknow. .
.Iam sor ryifthisI
toomuchf oryoubutt hi sis.( hegotup)Jeez!Ij ustwantt obehonestwi t
hyouwi thoutbr eaki ng
yourhear t.(Igotupt oo)Imi ghthaveaskedChant ellet omar ryme.
Me:Wow!
Thosear et heonl ywor dst hatIcoul df ind.Tear st ri
ckl eddownmycheeksandIwi pedt hem, not
thatt hathel pedbutIdi dn'twanthi mt oseemecr yanymor e.Iwast i
r edofcr yingovert hesame
thingoverandoveragai n.
Him:Iwascaughti nt hemoment ,wi thever ythingt hatshei sgoi ngt hr oughIj ust .
..Ihave
alwaysbeent heref orher .Onmywayher eal otwasgoi ngt hroughmymi ndt hatIhadt odr ive
tot hebeach, takeawal kandt hink.Li ker eal l
yt hi nk, Itri
edt oimagi newhatmyf atherwoul dsay
tomeatat imel i
ket his.At i
meofconf usi on, honest ywasmyanswer .Tobehonestwi thyou.I
car eaboutChant elleal ot ,shei st hemot herofmychi l
dandobvi ouslywi thapastl ikeour sitis
onlynor mal .Iam notsur ei fthat '
st her ightwor dt ousebutyeah. ..ButIwontuset hatcar dwi th
you, Iwantt obehonestwi thyou.Pouroutal loft heseemot ionssot hatIcanhaveacl ear
i
mageofwhatIwant .Ishoul dn'thavet ochoosebet weenyout oobecauseyouar emywi fe,my
soul mat e.Foraver yl ongt imeIt houghtshewas, Idi dn'
twantt omar r yyou.Ievenaskedhert o
mar r
ymej ustt oavoi dbei ngher ewi thyoubutyether ewear e.Somedef inei tasf at e,dest i
ny.
Youar emydest iny.
Me:But ?
Him:Nobut s...Atf i
rstIf eltli
keIhadt ol oveyoubecausewear emar r iedbutnowi tsonme, its
onme.Ichooset ol oveyou, wel lIdi dn' tchooset ol oveyou.Idon' treal lybel ievei nGodbutI
believet hatyouwer echosenf ormebyhi m.YeahImi ghthavechosenChant ell
et obemy
girl
f r
iendbecauseIt houghtIl oveherbutGodchooseyouf ormebecauseheknowsbet t
ert han
Ido.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Ireal l
ydon' tknowwher eIwasget t i
ngatwi tht hist alkori fitwasmaki ngsensebutever ytimeI
saidsomet hingIhavebeenhol dingbackIf eltlikeanamountofwei ghti sbei ngr emovedf rom
myshoul der s, nomat t
erhowl itt
lei twei ghs.
.
.
Phumza:
Him:I 'l
l giveyoual itt
lebackgr oundofmyl ifeandChant elle.ImethersheIwasi nmat ric, I
thoughtshewast hemostbeaut ifulgi rlIhaveeverseen.Shewasi ngr ade10, Iaskedherouti n
aai mt of uckanddi smi ssbutIf ell forherr eal l
yhar d.Ther ewasat i
mewher ewewer e
i
nsepar abl ebutasacoupl ewest ar tedf acingpr obl ems, ourpar ent sdi dn' tseeeyet oeye, t hey
want edeachot herdead.I tputal otofst r
aini nourr elationshi pwehadf ight sandal loft hat
crapbuti twaswhenshegotpr egnantandIaskedhert oabor tthatr ealt roubl est arted, Iwasn' t
readyt obeaf at herbackt hen.Wewentt oapar tyt hi sot herni ghtandshewast her e, tospi te
meshest ar teddoi ngst uffandt hatl edt oherr ape.Iki l
ledsomeonef orhert hatni ght ,herf ather
tookbl ameandwentt oj ail forme.
Me:What ?!Youki lledaman?Youhave. ..
Him:Justl ist enokay? !List en!( Inodded)Herf atherwasJer ome, bef or egoi ngt oj ailhemade
mepr omi set ot akecar eofhi sdaught er,tol oveherandneverbr eakherhear t
.ButIdi dn' tst ick
tot hat ,yeahIwast her ef orher .If eltr esponsi blef orwhathappenedt oherandIwast her ef or
hert hr oughi tal l.Ifeltlikeshewasmyr esponsi bility.Whenshedi sappear edIf eltl i
keIhadt o
fi
ndher , shewasmyr esponsi bil
itybecausemeandMandl at ookherf at her 'sl i
f eyetagai n.SoI
hadt of indherandwhenIdi dIf oundoutt hatt hesamet hinghappenedt oheragai n, itwas
wor set hist imeandi tsallbecauseofme.Ibr okeherhear tagai nandt hatl edt oher
mi sfor tunes, Itookbl ameandt houghti tsr eallyupt omet owi pet hoset ear sandpai naway.I
puthert hr oughal otofshi tandshef orgaveme, Icheat edonher ,
cur sedather , causedher3
mi scar riagesand1abor ti
on.Iputhert hroughal otofpai nandIwant edt owi peawayal loft hat.
Me:Bymar ryi ngher ?
Him:It houghtmar r
iagewast hebestanswert oever yt hingt hatIhavebeent hinki ngf ort hese
pastmont hs.It houghtIl oveher , wel lIdoj ustnotr omant i
cal lybutIj ustr eal isedt hatInever
l
ovedher , anyguyt hatt reat syoul iket hatdoesn' tl oveyou.Iwasf eel inggui lty, st i
llam.AndI
quest i
onedourl ovebutnotanymor e, whatweshar et houghourpar ent si nfluencedi titsr eal .I
haveneverbeensoaf raidofl osi ngsomeoneandhur tingyou, Ihavenevert houghtt hatIwoul d
everf eell ikeorseeaneedt obeabet t
ermanunt ilyou.YeahImadeal otofmi st akesi nt hese8
mont hsofourmar riageandIdon' tpr omi senott omakeanymor emi st akesort hatbei ngwi th
mei sgoi ngt obeeasybecausei tsnot .Mom al wayssaysmar riagei shar d, youwor khar dt o
makei twor k.Andmydadusedt osaysomet i
mesIwi llwakeuphat i
ngyou, hat ei sast rong
wor d.Buthesai dwear enotgoi ngt owakeupi nl ovewi theachot herever yday, wewontf ind
eachot hersexyal lthet ime, somet i
mesI '
llfindyouugl yandunat tract ive, wear egoi ngt of ind
outt hi ngst hatwear enotgoi ngt ol i
keabouteachot her, otherwomenar egoi ngt obecome
mor eat t
ract i
vet hanmywi fesomet imes, oursexl ifei sgoi ngt odi ef oraf ewdaysbutt hat
doesn' tmeanweshoul dgi veuponus, itdoesn' tmeant hatwedon' tl oveeachot her .Iam t rying
tosayal loft hoset hingshavehappenedt ome, Ihavedoubt edourl ove, oursexl ifei sgone, I
foundanot herwomanmor eat tract ive, Iwokeupf eduponedaybutIst illloveyou.Not hinghas
changedandIt hinknowIappr eciat eyoumor et hanbef or e, befor eyouwer et hi sper f ectand
sexyyounggi rlbutt odayyouar ei mper fectandyouar est illsexyandyoung.Butyouar ea
woman, mywoman, mywi f eandt hemot herofmychi ldren.Il ear ntt oappr eci ateyoumor e
throught hesechal l
engesandt hat '
swhy. .(hewentdownononekneeandt ookoutasmal lbox)
Thi sisme, thi si swhatIam al labout ,mypasti smypastnow, Ihaveaccept edi tandIhave
movedon.Iam i mper fect, Ihavemyf l
aws, Iwi l
lneverbeper f
ectbutIam aski ngyout opl ease
acceptmeasIam.( heopenedt hebox, i
twasanewr i
ngandt heol done)PhumzaMaj ola
Dlami niIknowyouar emywi feal readybutl atelyIseem t ohavedi vor cedyoubyhear t
, please
acceptt heser ings, mar rymeagai n.Makemet hehappi estmanonear thandbemywi feagai n
please.For giveme, please. .
.Acceptt hisimper f
ectmanasyourhusbandagai n, please.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Tear sf ormedi nhereyesandwentdownhercheekssl owl y, hermout hopenedandcl oseda
mul tiplet i
mes.Okayt hiswasn' tgoi ngasIi magi ned, ther ewast oomuchhonest yi nt her e
maybeIscar edherof f.Okaydadt hankyouf oryourhel p!Ther ei snowayshei sgoi ngt o
acceptmenow.
Me:Nomor egoi ngbackandf orth,itwasunf airofmet omakeyouaskt hewor stfrom me.Iam
notmadatyouf oraski ngmet ochoosebet weenyouandmyson, Iam madatmysel ffor
pushi ngyout ot hatcor ner .
Shet ookl efthandaf t
erwi pingherf ace, shepul ledof fmyr ingbutIcl osedmyhandbef or eshe
coul dt akei ti ntoherhand.
Me:Don' tpl ease, Iwi l
lt ryt obeabet termanbabepl ease.Thr ought hosechal lengesbabeI
l
ear ntt hatIl oveyoumor et hanIdi dwhenwegotmar riage, Ilear ntt oappr eciateyoumor e.
Pleasej ustacceptmebacki nyourl i
fe.
Her :Openyourhandpl ease.
Ishookmyheadbutshebeggedmet il
l Iopenedi t,shesl i
ppedi tof fandkneel edi nfrontofme.
Her :Ithankyouf oryourhonest yevent houghi thur tshear ingi tbutt hankyou, i
ttookal otof
gut st oadmi tyourwr ongsandbehonestwi t
hme.Iappr eciatei t
.Int hesepastcoupl eofweeks
Ilear ntanot hersi deofyou, itsnotaver ybeaut iful side.Ist artedquest ioningourl oveaswel l,I
wishedt hatIhadn' tgot teni ntot hismar riage.Idi vor cedyoubyhear t.
Me:BecauseIpushedyout hatf ar.
Her :Uhhht het rut hisal ittl
eoverwhel mi ng, itstoomuchbutaf terhear i
ngi tIloveyoumor e
thanIdi dbef ore.Iknowyounotanywher enearbei ngper fectbutIl oveyouanyway, Ihavea
l
otofquest ionsf oryoubutIwontaskt hem t onight .Toni ghtIwantust omendourbr oken
mar riage.I nt heseweeksIgott oknowt heYandi sat hatIdi dn'tknowbutt hatdoesn' tchange
anyt hingandIwantust ot ryagai n, faceourchal lengest oget herasacoupl e.St ar
tonacl ean
sleight ,Iwantust obehusbandandwi feagai n.Sot hat'
swhyIam onmykneesandaski ngyou
tomar rymeagai n, makemet hehappi estwomanal iveandbemi ne, mi neonl y.Idon' twantt o
shar eyouwi thanyoneespeci al
lyChant elle,Idon' twanthert obepar tofourl ives.
Me:Idon' twantyout oshar emeei ther ,Iwantt obeyour sandyour sonl y.
Her :Whatabouther ?
Me:Babenomor eChant elle, shei sQhawe' smot herandt hat '
swher ei tends.
Her :Youpr oposedt oher ,madeherbel ievet hatt her ecoul dbesomet hi ngbet weent het woof
you.
Me:Iknowandt hat '
swhyIwantt oi ntroduceyout wo, Iwantt osi tyoudownandt alktot he
bot hofyou.Ther ehavebeensomuchl i
esher eandIj ustwantt ocomeouti nt heopen, clear
ever ythingoutandmoveonwi t
hyou.
Her :Don' thumi liat eherpl ease.
Me:Iwontbutenoughabouther .Babemykneeshur t
.
Her :Sodomi ne.
Me:Gi vemeananswerpl ease.
Her :Wi llyoumar ryme?Wi l
l you?
Me:Iaskedf irst.
Her :ButIwantyout ocommi tyour selft omef irst.
Me:Iwi ll
, yesIwi llmar ryyou.
Shesl ippedt her ingbackar oundmyf i
ngert henki ssedi tandl ookedatme.
Her :I'l
lmar r yyou, I
'l
lbeyourwi f
eagai n.
Itookt her i
ngsandsl ippedt hem on/ ar oundherf ingert henki ssedt hem, t
heyl ookedper fect.I
justdeci dedt oaddanext rapi eceont her i
ng.
Me:Thankyou.
Her :Thankyou.
Iwr appedmyar msar oundherwai standweshar edaki ss, agui ltfreeki ss,myconsci encewas
clearandf r
ee.Al otofwei ghtwasr emovedf r om myshoul der sal lt hankst ot hemanwho
raisedme, event houghhewasgonehi swor ds, advi cesr emai nedi nmyhear tandt rappedi n
mymi ndf orever .Thankyoudad!Webr oket heki ssandsmi l
ed.
"Iloveyou" ,wesai di nuni son.
Me:Let st ellourpar entst hegoodnews.
Wegotupandwal kedi nsi det hehouse, Igr eet edandt heyr epl iedback.
Granddad:Wehavebeenwai t i
ngf oryou.
Me:Wel lgr anddadbef oreyoucont inue, wewoul dl iket oapol ogi zef ormaki ngyoudr i
veal lt
he
wayher ef ornot hing.
Mom l aughedandcl appedonce.
Mom:Youshoul dst arttakingyourmar r
iageser iously,thisi sn'tnot hing.
Me:Mamapl easeIknowyoumeanwel lbutr eallywedon' tneedyourhel pr i
ghtnow.Mywi fe
andIspokeandwedeci dedt hatwear eget tingmar ri
edagai nont he20t hofDecember ,we
goingt het radi tionalwaynow.
Them:What ?
Phumi :Wear eget t i
ngmar r
iedagai n.
Me:Wespokeandwor kedoutourpr obl emst oget her,wi t
houtyouri nfl
uenceori nterference.We
doingt hi sf orusbecausewel oveeachot her .
Mom:Soyouar eget t
ingmar ri
edagai n?
Me:Tr aditional lyonourweddi ngday, onouranni versary.Wewi llrenewourvows.
Ourmot her sul ulat edandt heycongr at ulatedusonceagai n.
Phumi '
smom:Phumzababy, youar enotababyanymor eyouhavepr ovenyour selftobea
woman.Iam pr oudofyou.
Phumi :Thankyoumama.
Mom:Yourf atherwoul dbesopr oudofyou, Iam pr oudofyou.Iam pr oudoft hewayyou
handl edever yt hing, keepi tupanddon' teverdowhatyoudi dagai n.Talkaboutyourpr oblems,
fi
xt hem ashusbandandwi fe.
Me:Youmeanwi thouti nvolvingt hef ami ly.
Mom:Wi thouti nvol vingt hef ami l
yandmovi ngout .
Me:Neveragai nma, Ilovemywi fe.Li keIr eal lyl oveherandIwoul dbest upi dtolethergo, I'
ll
neverhur theragai n.Tobehonestshei st hebestt hingt hathaseverbeenmi ne.Itt akesnear ly
l
osingorl osi ngsomet hingt or eal iseitswor th, shei swor thsomuch.
Mom:Iam pr oudofyou.
Me:Thankyoumama.
Mom:Andhappyf oryou.
Ismi ledandhuggedher .
.
Phumzadi shedupf orever yoneandser vedust henj oinedusandweat et ogetherwhi l
et hey
gaveusmor eadvi cesandt oldusaboutt hei rexper i
encesandchal lenges, marriedai n'
tawal k
i
nt hepar kespeci allyourmar riage.I tsnoteasy, i
ttakeshar dwor k, honesty,respect ,tr
ustand
communi cat iont omakei twor k.Di dIment ionl ove?Somet i
mesl oveal onei sn'tenought o
makei twor k.That '
swhatIl ear ntf rom mypar ent sandmyexper iencet oday.
.
.
Phumza:
Aft
ereat ingIt ookt hedi shest ot heki tchen, mom of feredt owasht hem formesoIwentt ot ake
ashowert henwentt obat handf eedoursoccert eam.Af terf eedingQhayi yaYandi sawal kedi n
l
ooki ngal lsexyi nshor tsonl y, hel ookedathi ssonsandki ssedt hem t henki ssedmyf orehead.
Him:Ar eyouokay?
Me:Yeah.Youshoul dbui l
dyourr elationshi pwi t
hQhawe, heneedsaf atherandyouneedyour
son.
Mom' swor ds!
Him:Thankyoubabe, weshoul dfindawayt omakeourr elationshi pwi thhi m comf or t
able
enoughf oryou.Awayt hatisnotgoi ngt omakeyouf eelthr eatenedbyhi smot her.
Me:Iam not ,Iknowt hatyouar emi neandmi neonl y.
OkayIst i
llf eltt hreat enedmor eespeci all
yaf terhi sconf essi on.
Him:Yougott hatr ight .
Hebendedandki ssedmyl ips.
Him:Howmanydoyoust il
lhavet ofeedr ightnow?
Me:3mor eandIam done.
Him:I 'l
l wai tf oryoui nbed, Ihaveal ettert odr awup.
Me:Babeaboutt hatpl easedon' tr esignyet , notwhi leyouhaven' tf oundaj ob.
Him:Youar egoi ngt obeokaywi thmewor kingandshar i
nganof ficewi t
hher ?
Me:Af tert alki ngt ohermaybe.
Hi m:Tomor rowdur ingl unchI 'llfet chyouandwecanhavel uncht oget her .
Me:Wi llshebet here?
Hi m:Yeaht hesoonerwegett hi soutoft hewayt hebet terf orever yone.Thesoonerwecan
focusonusandourmar ri
age.
Inodded.
Hi m:I '
ll seeyoui nbed.
Webabyki ssedt henhewal kedout ,
It hinkIhaveYandi saback.
.
.
Yandi sa:
Af t
er30mi nut esPhumzawal kedi ntoourbedr oom.
Her :It houghtIwoul df indyouasl eep.
Me:Ihadst uf ftodo.
Iclosedmyl apt opandputi tont hesi det ableasshegotont hebed.
Me:Comeher e.
Shegotcl oserandr est edherheadonmychest ,Iwr appedmyar msar oundherandki ssedher
forehead.
Me:Ican' tbel ieveIal mostl ostyou.
Her :You' llnevergetr idofmet hateasi l
y.
Me:GoodbecauseIdon' twantt ogetr idofyouei ther.
Shel ookedupatmewi thasmi leonherf ace.
Her :Il oveyou.
Me:Il oveyou.
IKi ssedherl i
ps, j
ustapeck.
Her :Imi ssyou.
Me:Iam r ighther e.
Her :Imeant hatImi ssyou, Iwantyout omakel ovet ome.
Sher anherf ingerdownmyst omachanddownt omypeni s, Iheldherhand.
Me:Oh!Whataboutyouknow?Wai t
ingt i
llt
heyar e6mont hs?
Her :Itsj ustoneni ght, howmuchhar m canbedonei nj ustoneni ght?
Ichuckl edt hengotbet weenherl egsandki ssedherneck, maki ngsur et osuckr eall
yhar dsoI
l
eaveamar k.
Her :OhYandi sa!
Shemoanedoutmynamesof tlyandwr appedherl egsar oundmywai stwhi l
eherf i
nger s
tracedupanddownmyspi ne.Ihadt ost opf orawhi leandl ookather , hereyeswer ecl osedbut
i
mmedi at elyopenedwhenIst oppedki ssi ngher .
Her :What 'swr ong?
Me:Il oveyou.
Shesmi ledandpul l
edmebackourl ipsmetandweshar edani ntimateki ss,wheredidshel earn
toki ssl iket hat ?Fuck!It ookof fherni ghtdr essandki ssedt hespacebet weenherbr east sall
thewaydownt oherbel l
ybut ton, herscarwasn' tthatvi sible.I twassmal lactuall
y,Ipul l
edof f
herpant iesandt ossedt hem acr osst her oom t hent r
acedmyf i
nger supanddownheri nner
l
egscausi nghert obreat heheavi ly.Shehel dmyhandasIsl ippedmyi ndexf i
ngerinher
alreadywetvagi na.
Her :Yandi sa
Shebr eat hedoutl oudl ybutmynamewasst i
llsoft.Ist artedmovi ngmyf ingeraroundhert hen
i
nandoutsl owl ycausi nghert omoananddr opmyhand.Iki ssedherpar tedlipsandt racedal l
thewaydownherneck, betweenherbr easts, bell
ybut tont henf inall
yhervagi na.Ipulledmy
fi
ngeroutt henki ssedherdownl ow, itsbeenawhi leandIr eallymi ssedher .Shecuppedmy
faceandpul ledmeupt oherl ips, Itookof fmyshor tswi thonehand, f
ol l
owedbymyboxer s.I
pushedherl egsf urtherapar tandposi tionedmysel fthensl owl ythrusti n, ohthatfel
theavenl y.
Thef eel ingwasexqui siteyetonl yhal fofmewasi nher ,Iki ssedherl i
pst ocuthermoansand
movedal li n.Shesl appedmyhi psandpushedmebymywai stonceIwasal lburi
edinher ,I
spilled/ camei mmedi atel y.Maybeshef eltthatt oo, Ilookedather .
Me:What '
swr ong?
Sheshookherhead.
Me:Shoul dIst ar tmovi ng?
Shenoddedsl owl y,Ipeckedherl i
pst henst artedmovi ngi ncircl
es.Shehel dmywai stt hen
movedupt hebed.Ihel dherwai st,tokeepheri npl aceandmovedi nandoutofhersl owl y.
Me:Aveul igwal a.
Her :Youi nt oodeep.
Me:Thi si st hef irstt i
meIam i ntoodeep.
Her :Andi thur ts.
Me:Buti tf eels. .
.OhGod!
Shewasmovi ngunderme, meet ingmehal fwayandboy!Ihel dherwai standpi ckedupmy
pace, hermoanspi ckedupaswel l.Theywer esweetandt heywer eclear l
ygoi ngt omakeme
haveanear l
yej acul ation.
Me:Wenotal onebabe.
Herpar ent swer ei nanot herr oom andIdi dn' twantt hem t ohearus.Ipul l
edherwai stof ft he
bedandpoundedagai nstherr eallyf astandhar d,Imi ssedt hefeeli
ngIgotwhenIwasi nher .
Shewas/ iswar m.
Her :Qhawe. ..
Shemoanedoutmynameasherf l
ui dsspi lledar oundme, Iwascer tainlygoingt ocomenow.I
moveddeeperandf ast er .
Me:Il oveyou.
Wi tht hel astt hr ustIspi ll
edandcol l
apsedont opofher , Ikissedherneckandwai t
edf ormy
breat het ogai ni tsnor mal ity.
Her :Il oveyou.
Shewi pedt hesweatof fmyf oreheadt henki ssedmyl ips.
Me:Iam r eal l
ysor ryforhur t
ingyou.
Her :Shhhi tsal lint hepastnow.
Imovedmyupperbodyof fherandbal ancedbymyar msasIkneel edi nfrontofheragai n.
Me:You' l
lwakeuppr egnantagai n.
Icoul df eelmysel fgettinghar dagai n.
Her :Thatbet t
erbenott hecaseYandi sabecauseIwontbeabl etocar ryanot herchi ld.
Me:I tsnotl ikeyouhaveanopt ion, oDl ami nibavumi le.
Shepushedmeof fherandIl aughedbutdi dn'tmove.
Me:Don' tf orgett hatIam st rongert hanyou.
Her :Iam notababymaki ngmachi ne.
Me:Iwasj okingj eez.
Ikissedherl ipsandci r culat edi nhercut tingherof fcompl etel
y,herwor dswer er eplacedby
moans.Ichuckl edandki ssedt hespacebet weenhereyes.
Me:Your ideme.
Igotof fherandl aidnextt ohert henpul ledherupandoverme.Ihel dherwai stst eadyand
pulledherdownwhi lemeet ingherhal fway, shewi ncedandpushedmywai stdown.Ichuckl ed
andpul ledherdownwi thmecausi nghert oscr eam, Iputmyhandoverhermout handst ar t
ed
movi ngunderher .Ipul ledhert owar dsmeandwr appedmyar msar oundherwai st,shesl owl y
circulat edt henmovedupanddowni naver yt easi ngmot i
on.
Me:St opt easi ng.
Shegi ggl edandr epeat edt hesamemovesi nt hever ysamemot ion,Ispankedherbut tcheeks
thenl iftedmywai stupandmethermoveshal f waybuti naqui ckerpace.
.
.
Phumza:
Ever ytimehet hr usti nIf eltli
kemybr eathewasbr eaki ngof f,mybut tholehur tsodi dmy
bellybut tonbutpl easur ewasdef init
el yinmot i
oni nt hemostwei r
dandcr azyway.Imi ssedt he
feelingIgotwhenhewasi nme, fil
li
ngmeupandt easi ngme.Hi spacepi ckedupandsodi dmy
moans, Icoul dn' thel pmysel f.
Me:DeeperQhawe, deeper .
Hef ollowedmyi nst ruct ionsandohgosh!Lor dhave. .Ohmy!Icoul dfeelmycl i
max, i
twas
close.Hehi tmysensi tivespotagai nandwar mf l
uidsgushedout ,hewr appedhi sar msar ound
mywai stt ight lyandmovedi ndeepert hanbef or e.I naf ewsecondsIf elthisfluidsf il
lmeand
himr elax.Thatwasamazi ngandIwant edmor e,Icoul dn'tgetenoughofhi m.Iknewi twas
greedyofmebutIcoul dn' thel pmysel f,nowonderChant ellecan' tgetoverhi m.Nowondershe
justkeepswant ingmor ebutsheshoul dbackof fnow, hei smi ne.Al lthisdel iciousness, it
s
mi ne.
Him:Youar eamazi ng.
Heki ssedmyneckandf li
ppedusoversohecoul dbeont op.
Him:Ineedwat er.
Me:Pl easebr ingmesomeaswel l.
Henoddedandpul ledoutsl owl yt hengotof fme.Het ookhi sshor tsandwor et hem t hen
wal kedout .Ismi l
edandpul ledt hebedcoverovermynakedbody.Hewal kedi naf teraf ew
mi nut eswi tht wogl assesofmi lk.
Him:Dr inkt hat .
Isatupandt ookt hegl assofmi lk.
Him:Tous, toourmar riage, ourl ove.Tomanymor el ovef ill
edmont hs,year s.
Igiggl edashecl ickedhi sgl assagai nstmi ne, welcomebackt omycheer f
ulandcr azyhusband.
Him:Imi ssedt hatbeaut ifulgi ggl e.
Iblushedandt ookasi pofmymi lk.Hedownedhi smi lkinonegot henputt hegl assont heside
tableandt ookof fhi sshor ts, hegoti nnextt omeandhuggedmywai stwi thhi sot herhand
bet weenmyl egs.Il ookedathi m ashesl ippedhi sf ingeri nmysor evagi na.
Me:Don' tyougetenough?
Him:Notofyou.
Hepul l
edoutandputt hef i
ngeri nhi smout h, Ipushedhi sheadandhel aughed.
Me:Younast y!
Him:I tsnotl ikeIdon' teati t,youdel i
cious.
Me:OhmyGod!
Agai nhel aughed, liker eal lylaughed.Ihaven' thear dthatl aughi nawhi le,itwasbeaut iful.
Me:Thi si sembar rassi ng.
Him:Youar esoshyt hough.
Me:Andyouj usthavet ot easeme.
Him:NoIam j ustst atingt hef act s,youar edel i
cious.Andshyandi nnocent ,Ifindi tsexy.
Me:St opokay.
Iputt heempt ygl assont hesi det ablet hensl eptonmysi dewi thmyheadonhi schest .He
kissedmyf orehead.
Him:Il oveyouyoudel icioussexyhotmama.
Me:OhmyGod!
Hel aughedandpul l
edt hecoveroverourheadsandhewentdownt omyl owerbody.
Me:Whatar eyoudoi ng?
Him:Shhhanddon' tbel oud.
Heopenedmyl egsandgotbet weent hem, heki ssedmyi nnert hi
ghl eavingwett racesi nevery
placeheki ssed.Iwasget tinghor nybyj usthi skisses.Ihel dhisheadandpul ledhi mt omy
vagi na, Icoul dhearhi ml aughashi st onguet easedme.Icovermymout hwi thmyhandst o
l
imi tmymoans.
.
IwaswokenupbyYandi saki ssi ngmyl ips, Istretchedandyawnedt henopenedmyeyes.
Me:Mor ning
Him:Mor ningmyl ove, Imadeyoubr eakf ast.
Me:Br eakf asti nbed?
Him:Yeppl easedon' tj udgemyf oodsomuch.It riednott obur nit.
Isatupandl ookedat het r ay, hemademeanomel et t
eandt oastt henf ruits(Pi neappl eand
grapes)andor angej uice.
Him:Igott hoset hismor ni ng.
Me:Youwentt ot hest or e?
Him:Yeah.
Me:Kant iwhatt i
mei si t?
Him:9: 30, IknowIam l at e.I'llbeof frightnow.
Ididn' tnot icet hathewasal ldr essedf orwor k.
Him:OhIchangedt heki ds' nappi es, Iwi llbringt hem her esoyoucanf eedthem buteatf i
rst
.
Me:Di dyoueat ?
Him:I 'l
l buyasandwi chandcof feeonmywayt owor k.
Me:OhmyGodIam sor rybuti tsal lyourf aul t
.
Hel aughed.
Him:Whatdi dIdo?
Me:Youkeptmeupal lnight .
Him:Youmeanyoukeptmeawake, letmebr ingt heki ds.Yi dl a.
Hewal kedoutandwentt ogett hem t henki ssedusgoodbyeandwentt owor k.
.
Mom wal kedi nmi nut esaf terYandi sawal kedout ,jeezIl ookedar oundt heroom ourcl othes
andwer est il
lont hef loorsower emypant i
es.
Me:Whatar eyoudoi ngher e?Yandi sawoul dn'tfreaki fhef oundyouher e.
Ourbedr oom wasof flimi ts.
Her:Don' twor ryhel ef tforwor k,heaskedmet or emi ndyouaboutl unch.Hewi llpi ckyouupat
1h00.
Ithoughthef or gotyazi ,Ismi l
edandnodded.Shel ookedar oundt her oom andsmi leaswel l
.
Her:Ni semat handweni .
Ohmygosht heyhear dusl astni ght ,thiswassoembar rassi ng.
Her:Itsnot hi ngt obeembar rassedaboutbabybutpl easeyouhavet ost icktot hepl an, they
needal lthenut rient st heycanget .
Me:Iknowmamai twasj ustl astni ghtkuphel a.
Her:Thewhol eofl astni ght ?Iknowhowyouyoungst er sar e, yourhor monesar ewi l
d.
Me:Jeezmamapl ease!
Shel aughed.
Me:I tsembar rassi ng.Wher eusdad?
Her:Sl eepi ngandi thi youkeptusawake. ..
Me:JesusChr istst op!
Shel aughedandt ookoneoft heki ds, Idon' tknowwhor eally.
Her:Theyneedal lthei rnut rients, thei rfathercan' tt akeal loft hem.
Me:OkaymamaIhear d.
Agai nshel aughed.
Her:ButIam happyt hatyouar ewor kingonyourmar riage.
Me:YouandIbot hmama, tothinkt hatIwasr eadyt owal kaway.
Her:Hel ovesyou.
Me:Yeahandhei sn' tper fectbutIl ovehi mt oo.Wi thal lhi sf l
aws.
Her:Iam gl adt oheart hat, nomor et hreateni ngt owal koutnow.
Me:Nomor emama, wear egoi ngt ogot hr oughever ythingt oget her .
Shegavemet hebabyi nherar msandt ookt heoneIhadi nmyar ms, Ifedhim.
Her:Di dyout alkabouthi sson?
Me:Yeahandhei sgoi ngt ocont inuebui ldinghi sr elationshi pwi thhi m.Andhepr omi sedt o
makei tcomf or tabl ef orme.
Her:Meani ng?
Me:Wear egoi ngt ohavel unchwi thChant ell
et oday, hei sgoi ngt ocl earever ythi ngbet ween
him andheri nmypr esence.
Her:That 'sgoodt oknowbaby, thatChant el l
eshoul dknowt hatyouar ehi swi f
e.Hemar ri
ed
youandhel ovesyou.Shecan' tgetbet weent het woofyou, andt ellhert ostayawayf rom your
husband.Putyourf ootdownphakuye, ifshewant ssomet hi ngf rom yourhusbandconcer ni
ng
theirsonsheshoul dgot hr oughyou.Passt hemessaget oyouandyou' l
lpassi tont ohi m.
Me:Ipl ant ot ellhermymi ndmama, Idon' tcar ei fshewaswi thhi m bef oremehei smi nenow.
Hei swi thmenow.
Her:Ut het hebaby, Iwi thyouhadBul elwa' smi ndandgut si nat i
mel iket hi
s.
Ismi led, IknowIam sof tandIwaspr obabl ygoi ngt ochi ckenouti nfrontofher .
Her:Uzi l
ungi seubephakebabysot hatsheseest hathel eftherf orgr eenerpast ur es.
Ilaughed, mymot hert hough.Inodded.
Her:Ewebaby.
.
.
Yandisa:
Beingar oundChant el l
efeltawkwar dandwei rdevent houghIwasi gnoringherhal fthet ime, we
onlyspokeaboutwor k.Iignor edherwhenshest artedget tingper sonal ,at12h30Ipackedmy
bagthengotup.
Me:Chacanwepl easegof orl unchatt hepar k.
Her:Youcan' tignor emeal l dayt henexpectmet omel twhenyoubr ingupt hepar kandl unch.
Me:Wehavet ot alkCha, youmeandmywi fe.
Thepar kwasqui etdur i
ngt hist i
meoft heday.
Her:Isitaboutus?
Me:Yeahatt hepar k, I
'l
lgof etchherr i
ghtnow.Meetust her eplease.
ShenoddedsoIwal kedoutanddr ovebackhome.
.
WhenIgothomeIpar kedt hengotof fandwal kedi n,myi nlawswer ei ntheloungeeat ingand
watchingt v.
Me:Mol weni .
Them:Mol onyana.Howar eyou?
Me:Goodandyou?
Them:Good, good.
Me:Okayi sPhumzar eady?
Fatherinl aw: NyanacanIt alkt oyouf oraf ewseconds.
Inoddedandsatdownacr osst hem.
Him:Iam pr oudofyouandhowyouhandl edyourmar riagepr oblems.
Me:Thankyout ata.
Him:Yourf atherwoul dber eal lypr oudofyou, her aisedyouwel l.
Me:Thankyou.
Him:Iam goi ngt obegoi ngbackhomel atet oni ght,Ilef tBul elwaal lalone.
Me:Iunder standt at a.
Him:Hmm bef oreIl eaveIwoul dliketoleaveyouwi thaf ewwor ds.Iam sur eyourf atherhas
saidthist oyoubef or ebutIwi l
lsayi tagain,neveral lowat hirdper soni nyourr elationshi p.
Don'tever ,nomat tert hepr obl emsyouhavewi t hyourwi fe.Don' teverseekcomf or tint hear ms
ofanot herwoman, youandPhumzaar eyoung.Youwi llfacechal lenges, t
heywontbeeasy,
somet i
mesyouwi llwi sht ogi veupbutf i
ghtt hem t oget her .Andhol dont othel i
tt
let hings, t
he
j
oyful memor iesyoushar edt oget herandf ightt ogether .Hol dont oeachot herandf i
ght
togethernotagai nsteachot her .
Me:Thankyout ata.
Him:Onemor ething, aboutt heweddi ngwewi llwai ttohearf rom you.Phumzaaskedust obut
t
outofyourmar r
iageandl ett het woofyoudot hi ngst oget herwi thoutouri nfluence.
Me:Thankyout ata.
Him:Kul ungi l
ekenyanayoucangot oyourwi fe.
Inoddedandgotupandwal kedt oourbedr oom.If oundPhumii nf rontofthemi r
rorput tingon
makeup.
Me:Ihopeyouar edonebabe.
Her:Almost .
Isatont hebedandl ookather .
Me:Youchangedourbedandcur tai
ns.
Her:Yepmypar ent shear dusl astnightandmom gaveusal ectureaboutwai ti
ngandf ollowing
i
nstructions.
Ichuckl ed.
Me:Itwasj ustoncebutIdon' tpr omi sethati twonthappenagai n.
Her:Ust outYaya.
Shest oodupandi r onedouthercl ot
hes, shewasi nabl ackt opshowi ngabi tofcl eavageand
whitejeansandsandal s.Hermakeupl ookedgood, herhai r
,sheher selfwasonf leek.
Me:Youl ookwow.
Her:Thankyou.
Me:Ner vous?
Her :Ar eyou?
Me:Al i
ttle.
Itookherhandandpul l
edhert ome, Iwr appedmyar msar oundherandshehel dmyshoul ders.
Thenl ookedupatme.
Her :I'
llbebyyoursi de, wewi lldot hist ogether.
Me:DoIevendeser veyou?
Her :Nope!
Shesai di napl ayf ul manner .
Me:Ohwel lthen. .
.
Iunwr appedmyar msar oundherbutshehel dthem andkeptt hem inplace.
Her :Iloveyou.
Me:Il oveyoumor e.
Weshar edaki sst henshet ookherphoneandwewal kedout .Wecheckedont heki dsfirstthen
wewal koutt oourcar ,Iopenedt hedoorf orherandshegoti n.Iclosedthenwal kedovert omy
sideandgoti n, Istar tedt hecaranddr oveoutsl owl y.
Me:Woul dyoul ikeanyt hingbef or eweheadt ot hepar k?
Her :Wat erandsweet spl ease.
Me:Youhavet ocutdownont hat ,weheadi ngt ot hegym t onightwhenIgetbackf rom wor k.It
s
aboutt imeyoul oset hebabywei ght .
Ireachf orherhandandpl acedi tonmyl apt henchangedt hegear .
Her :Ithi nksot oo.
Me:Soyouar eupf ori t
?
Her :Of cosIwantmybodyback.
Ismi ledandputmyhandoverherhand.
.
Whenwegott ot hepar kIpar kedt henwegotof f.Iwal kedovert ohersi deandt ookherhand
i
nt omi ne, Iki ssedi tandwewal kedovert oChant el l
ewhowassi t
ti
ngont hegr
assandr eading
abook.
Me:HeyCha- Chant elle.
Shecl osedt hebookandgotup.
Cha:Hi .
Hereyeswentdi rectlyt oPhumzat hendownt oourhands, Phumit i
ghtenedhergr ip.Iwant edto
smi lebuti twoul dn'tlookappr opr iate.
Me:Uht hi si sPhumzamywi f
eandPhumi Chant elle,Qhawe' smot her.
Iexpect edt hem t oshakehandsbutt heyj ustst aredateachot herwithoutevenbl i
nking, okay!
Phumisi ghedt henl ef tgoofmyhandandsl appedt hel i
vingdayl ightsoutofChant ell
e,i
t
actual l
ysoundedl i
keagunshot .Itwasl oudandscar y.
Cha:Whatt hef uck? !
Shepul ledPhumzabyhert op.
Me:WoahbabewoahmanChant ell
e!Getyouyourhandsof fher !
Iyankedherhandsof fPhumza' st op, sher i
pi tasshel etgo.Ist oodbet weenthem andpushed
them back.
Me:Woahst handwasam, woah.
Cha:Yourbi t
chsl appedme!
Me:Your ippedhert opont opoft hatyoucal ledherabi tch!Shei smywi f
edamni t
!Youdon' t
callhernames.
Phumza:Openyourski nnyl egsf orhi m agai nandIwi lldomor ethansl apyouthist ime.
Cha:Wel lheenj oyedbei ngbet weent heseski nnyl egsandi fyoukepthi m happyandsat i
sfied
hewoul dn' thavebeenbet weent hesel egswhi lemar r
iedt oyourf atass!
Me:Woahmanl adi es!
Phumzasl appedmeunexpect edl y, Ilookedather .Shehadt earsinhereyes.
Me:Babe
Phumza:Di dyouenj oybei ngbet weent hosel egs?Di dyou?
Me:NobabeImadeami stakeandIam sor ryabouti t
.
Cha:Ami st ake?Ami stakeYandi sa? !Yout oldmet hatyoul oveme!
Me:OhmyGodChant ellecanyoushutup? !BabeIam sor ry.
Phumi :Doyoul oveher ?Doyou?
IlookedatChant elle.
Me:I '
m sor ryCha.
Cha:Younotbei ngser i
ous.
Me:It houghtIdi dbecauseofourhi storyandourson, IthoughtIdi dbutIdon' t.Not
romant ically, Iam i nlovewi thmywi f
e.AndIwantt owor konourmar ri
age.
Sheat t empt edt osl apmebutIhel dherwr ist.
Me:Icar eaboutyouokay?Youar ethemot herofmychi ldbutshei smywi f
eandIl oveherwi t
h
mywhol ebei ng.Pl easef or givemef ormi sleadi ngyou, forgetaboutwhatIsai dyest erday.
Forgetaboutmeandpl easeacceptourpastasj ustthat ,wecanneverbet ogetheragai n.
Cha:Soyoubr oughtyourwi f eher etohumi l
iatemei nfrontofher ?
Me:NoCha, Ibr oughtherher esowecoul dt alk.
IletgoofChant el l
e' swr istandl ookedatbot hoft hem.
Me:Ther ei sonl yoneofme, onehear tandi tbel ongt oher .IloveherCha, IreallyloveherandI
don'twantt ol oseher .Pl easet ellmet hatyouunder stand?Pl ease.Pl easeacceptmyapol ogy,I
nevermeantt obr eakyourhear t.IknowyouandIgowayback, wehaveacr azyandbeaut i
ful
historyt oget herbutt hat '
swhati tis,hi st
or y.I tcannevert omor esopl easeacceptmyapol ogy
toyouandmymar r i
aget oher .IloveherCha.
Cha:Iknowbutyoumi sledme.
Me:AndIam sor ry.
Cha:I tshur tsYandi sa, ithur t
s.
Me:Iam sor ry.
Iheldhershoul der sandpul ledhert ome, Iwr appedmyar msar oundher .
Me:Iam r eal lysor rybutpl easel etmego, letgooft hepast .
Cha:Youf ellinl ovewi thher ?
Me:If el linlovewi thher .
Webr oket heembr aceandshewi pedhert ear st henl ookedatPhumza.
Cha:I fyout hinkyoucanmakehi m st ickar oundyouandr espectyouorevent reatyoubet t
er
thanhet reat edme.I fyout hinkyoucanmaket hat" inlove"l astlonggof oritbutIknowhi m, I
knowYandi sa.Theonl yper sonhel ovesi shi m andhi sdi cknooneel se.
That '
snott rue!
Phumi :I'l
lt akemychances.
Cha:Goodl ucki nkeepi nghi m happyandsat i
sf iedatal ltimesandf oryourownsake, Ireal
ly
wishhedoesn' tchange.Ihopehekeepsupwi t hhisact .
Phumi :Itsnotanact , hel ovesme.
Cha:Nodoubtaboutt hatbutunt i
lwhen?Askyour selfthatquest ion.
Me:Pl easedon' tdot hi sCha, don'tf i
llherheadwi thbul l
shi t.
Phumit ookmyhand.
Phumi :Don' twor ryabouti t,for ever.
Cha:Doyour eal lyt hi nkt hatst upidr ingwi llst ophi m?Hesl eptwi thmewi tht hatringaround
hisfingersor eal lyf oryoursakeIhopehedoesn' tchange.
Me:I tshur tt alki ngsoIwontevenl i
stent oyou.
Cha:Ihopet hi sdaydoesn' tcomef oryout oo, wher eyouhavet opr etendlikeyouunder stand
andmoveon.
Me:Youar ej ustt ryingt of il
lherheadwi t
hbul lshit,t
hatwi l
lneverhappen.
Iwasn' tpl anni ngonhur tingheragai nsoi tr eal lyisn'tgoi ngt ohappen.
Cha:Goodl uck, goodl uck.
Me:Thankyou.AboutQhawe. .
.
Cha:Don' tevensayhi sname, stayawayf rom hi m.St ayawayf r
om myson.
Me:Hei smysont oo.
Cha:That '
sj ustapi ty.
Phumi :Pl easel ethi m seehi m.
Cha:Shutup!I 'llseewhatIcando.
Phumi :Thanks.
Cha:Dr opt heni cel ittlegi rlact .I'l
lseeyoui nt heof f
ice.
Shewal kedaway.Phumzat urnedt omeandhi tmychest.
Her:Youj usthadt or i
ght ?Takemehome.
Me:Babe. ..
Her:Yandi saplease!
Shewal kedbackt oourcarandIf ol
lowedaf t
erher.
Me:Ithoughtwewer egoi ngt ohavel unchtogether
.
Igotinthedr iver
'sseatandl ookedather .
Her:Startthisdamnt hingYandi sa!
Me:Babecanwet alkaboutt his,r
ememberwhatwesai d.Communicat
ionandhonest
y.
Her:Idon'twantt ot alk!Andl ookatt histhi
ng,sheruinedmyt op.
Me:Yousl appedher .
Her:Soyouar edef endi ngher ?!
Me:Canyoust opshout ingPhumzaIam notdeaf .
Shefoldedherar msi nf rontofher .
Me:Iguesswewi lleatathome.
Ist
artedt hecaranddr oveushome, Iboughttakeawaysonmywayt here.

63
Yandisa:
WhenwegothomeIpar kedt henwegotof f,
wellPhumzagotof fbef or emeandwal kedin
l
eavingmeout side.It ookt hetakeawaysandwal kedi nsidet hehouse.
Me:Tat omkhul u.
Henodded.
Motheri nlaw:Whyi sshemad?
Me:St uff
.Ibr oughtt akeaways.
Shefol l
owedmet ot heki t
chen.
Her:Thankyounyana, Ihavebeent hinkingthatsinceyouar ebackandt heyareol denough
now, t
heyar eheal thy.AndIcanseet hatyouwi l
lmanagej ustf inewi thoutme.
Me:Youar el eavi ngt onightaswel l
?
Her:Ireall
ymi ssmyhouseandmydaught er.
Me:Itsokaymamauht hankyouf orhel pinguswi ththem, wer eallyappr eciat
eit.
Her:It
snot hing, youandPhumzaar emychi ldr
en.
Me:Thankyoumamayoucandi shupf oryou,tat
aandt atomkhul u,I'llcheckonPhumza.
ShenoddedsoIwentt oourr oom.
.
.
Phumza:
Whenhewal kedi ntoourr oom Il ookedawayandwi pedt hetear s.
Him:Whyar eyoucr yingngoku?
Me:Goaway.
Him:I'
llbel eavi ngf orwor ki naf ewmi nutesanyway.
Hesoundedi rritated.
Me:Thengo.
Him:Whyar eyoucr yingPhumza?
Me:Youdef endedher !
Him:Whydi dyousl apher ?Thatwasast upi
dmoveandi fIwasn' tthatshewasgoi ngtofuck
youup, Chant ellei sn'tthetypeofgi rl
youwantt ogeti naf ightwi th.Shewi llmessyouup.And
havesomer espectf oryour self,
youar eawi feandmot herof8chi l
dr enyoushoul dn'tbe
fi
ghti
ngi npubl i
c.
Hayisuka!
Me:Soyout hinkt hatyourbi tch...
Him:Don' tcal lherabi tchorIwi l
lslapyoumysel f,shemot her'smyson!Andaf terallt
heshit
shehasbeent hr oughr eall
yIwi llfuckyouupmysel fi
fIheart hatmancomeoutofyourmout h
againespeci al lyaddr essedt oheroranywomant hati sinhersi tuation.
Whatt he?!
Me:Youar est i
lldef endi ngher .
Him:Iam notdef endi ngher !Youhaveabsol ut elynor ightt ocal lherabi t
ch!PhumzaChant ell
e
doesn' tneedal lthenamecal l
ingespeci allynotnow, shei sst illgoi ngthr oughst uff.AndIj ust
brokeherhear tagai n, foryou.
Me:Soi tsokayf orhert ocal lmeabi tch?
Him:Di dn'tIdi scipl ineherPhumza?Ihat et hatname, nowomanorgi rlshoul dbecal l
edabi t
ch
orwhor enomat terhowsl ut tyt heybehave.I t
sdi sr espect ful.
Ifoldedmyar msi nf rontofmychestandl ookedathi m, hewasmad.
Me:Wi llyoul eaveme?Wi llyoul eavemef orher ?
Him:Whatt hef uck?Phumzaphezol oIt oldyouwhatChai sgoi ngt hroughandf orawoman
youshoul dhaveal ittl
esympat hyf orherandnotcal lhernames.Leyokundihl abangempama
i
nf rontmyexnemibuzoengacacangai sr eal lygoi ngt opi ssmeof f!
Me:Forsomeonewhoki lledherf atheryouseem t o" car eal ot"!
Hechuckl edandwal kedt owar dst hedoor .
Him:Don' ttal kshi tyoudon' tknow.Idi dn'tpul lt
het riggernott hati tmat t
ers,It
oldyout hati n
conf idence.Idi dn' texpectyout of uckenusei tagai nstme.
Hewasr i
ght ,whatwasIt hinki ng?ButIwant edt ohur thi mt oo, hehasbeenwoundi ngmef or
thepast10mi nut es.Def endi ngt hatskank!
Me:Wi llyoust opl ovingmet hesamewayyoust oppedl ovingher ?
Him:Whatdoyout hink?
Me:WhatdoIt hink?WhatdoIt hink? !
Him:It ol dyout ost opshout ingatme, addr essmewi thf uckenr espectPhumzaungandi gezeli
mna.
Iinhal edandexhal edl oudl yt henl ookedathi m.
Me:Ar eyougoi ngt ol eaveme?Ar eyougoi ngt ost opl ovingmet oo?
Him:Idon' tt hinkIcaneverst opl ovingyou.I st hiswhywear ef ighting?Becauseyout hi nkI '
l
l
l
eaveyou?Chant elleandIwer enotmeantf oreachot her .
Me:Whatmakesyousosur e?Youwant edt omar ryhert wi ce.
Him:Whatdoyouwantmet odokePhumza?Got oher ?Iam her ewi thyouput t
ingupwi t
hyour
childishbehavi our .
Childish? !ButIdeci dedt oi gnor et hatr emar k.
Me:Doyouwantt ogot oher ?
Him:Nobabeyouar eenoughf orme.
Me:Wasn' tIenoughwhenyousl eptwi thher ?Wer en' tyouhappywi t
hme?
Honest l
yaf terhear ingandseei ngChant ellel iket hatIwasscar ed, andmor einsecur et hanever .
Yandi sawasn' tgoi ngt ol astl ongwi thme, hecoul dbr eakupwi thhi s7year sgir
lfriendt omar ry
ast rangert hencl ai mt onotf eel anyt hingf orher .Ndi yi ntonikemna?Whoam If orhi mt otreat
meanydi ffer ently?Al otwasof faboutYandi saandIdi dn'ttrusthi m atal l
,hewasat ot al
stranger .Thoughwehavel ivedt oget herf or8mont hshewasst illast ranger,atot alstranger .
Orhewasl yingt ome, hecoul dn'tevensayt hosewor dst oheraf ewmi nutesago.
Him:Babeyouwer eenough, Imadeami stakePhumza.Youcan' tholdt hatagainstmef orever.
Me:Doyoul oveher ?
Him:Ichoseyoudi dn' tI?Iam her ewi thyouar en'tI ?Iaskedyout omar rymeagai ndi dn'tI?
Youcan' tkeepaski ngmet hatquest ionoverandoveragai ni t
sst arti
ngt opissmeof f
.
Me:OhmyGod!Youcan' tevensayi t!Youevenhuggedanddef endedheri nmyf ace, youl ove
herdon' tyou? !
Him:JeezIdon' t
!
Me:Thensayi t!Sayt hewor ds!Tel lhert hatyoudon' tl oveher !Youcoul dn'tevent ellher !
Him:Idi d!
Me:Youj ustsai dsor ry!Andwhensher aisedt hel ovepar tyoushutherup.
Him:Ihonest lydon' tknowwhatyouwantf rom mePhumza.Imar r
iedyout houghIhadno
feelingsf oryouorknowyouandont opoft hatIt ri
edandst i
llam t ryingt omakei twor kwi th
you, Imakesur et hatyouf eel l
oved, accept edandappr eciatedi sn'tthatenoughf oryou? !Cut
mesomesl ack.
Me:Yousl eptwi thher !
Him:Sowhat ?!Itwasonce!Whycan' tyoumoveon? !
Me:Becauseyouhur tmyf eel ingsYandi sa!
Him:If uckenapol ogi zedf ort hatshi tIcan' tundoi t!FuckPhumzawhatdoyouwantf rom me
real l
y? !
Me:Thet ruth!
Him:Whatt rut h? !
Me:Doyoul oveher ?!
Him:Okay!Fi ne!Il oveherdamni t
!
What ? !Coul dn' thesayhedoesn' tloveher ?Justf ormysake.
Him:Andt hat 'swhyyouar eher eandshei sn' t!That 'swhatyouwant edt ohearr i
ght?Fuck
Phumzawhycan' tyouj ustst oppushi ng?Il oveyounother !Youar eher enother !Whycantyou
behappywi tht hat ? !
Me:Happy? !Don' tdomeanyf avors!Got oyourgi rlf
riendi t
squi tecl earthatyoul oveher .
Him:Gosh!I tf eel sl i
kewet akeonest epf orwar dandat housandbackwar ds!
Me:Doyouknowwhy?Becauseyouar eacheatandamur derer !Di dIment ional air
?Youar ea
l
ai rYandi sa, honest lyyoudi sgustme.Youandt hatgi rl!Youdeser veeachot her .
Him:Fi ne!I'm goi ngt oherr ightnowanddoyouknowwhatshei sgoi ngt odowhenIgett her e?
Acceptmewi thopenandwar m ar ms, acceptmyr idiculousapol ogy.Wear egoingt oki ssand
maybeI '
llmakel ovet oher ,Iwi llbebet weenherski nnyl egsagai nandshei sgoingt olovei t.
Andyou, you' llbeher ecr yingyoureyesout .
War mt earsf el lonmycheekst hatwascol d!
Me:Don' tcomeback!Don' tcomebackdoyouhearme? !
Him:YeahIwontcomebackt oyournaggi ngass!
Me:Getout !GetoutYandi sa!
Heputhi shandsupandwal kedouti mmedi ately.OhmyGod!Thathear t
lessbast ard!
.
.
Yandi sa:
IfPhumzawant edt obemadatmet henshewasmor et hanwel comeandIam gl adIgaveher
somet hingt obei nsecur eandmadaboutal lday, t
houghdeepdowni nsteadIknewi twas
wr ongandhear tlessofmet osayal loft hatcr apespeci all
yaf tercheat i
ngonher .Ididn' treally
cheatdi dI?Iwasunf aithful foroneni ghtandIqui cklyt r i
edt ocor rectmysel f,j
eezIr egr ettedi t
themi nuteIspi lledi nher .Thi swas/ i
shar donmeasi twasf orher ,pr obablymor ehardf orme
becauseIhadt obr eakt hehear tofthegi rlIl ovedsomuchevent houghIdi dn'treall
yshowi t
.I
had/ havet osuppor therass, putupwi thheri nsecur i
ties, putupwi thherl oudandpushysel f,
withhernaggi ng!JeezImessedupbutcutmesomesl ack!Ichoseheragai njeez!Ionl ymade
ami st akeonce, shi tcr ucifyme!Igoti nt hecaranddr ovet owor k.WhenIgott hereIpar ked
thenwal kedi nandwentst raightt ot heof fi
ce, IfoundChant ell
ecr yingoverherdesk.Ha. aha. a
ha. a!Il eftthecr yingPhumzaathomeonl yt of i
ndt hecr yingChant elleapha, comet ot hinkofi t
theywer en'tsodi fferent .Theywer ebot hannoyi nglybeaut i
ful,nags, l
oud, beaut i
ful(gent l
e, soft)
hear ts, crybabi es( theycr i
edovershi t),theybot hrespectmeandl oveme.Theyar ebot hmy
victims.ButPhumzawasn' tr ude, shedi dn' tcur seatal l,butshewas/ ispig-headed.Ihesi tated
bef orepul l
ingachai randt aki ngaseatnextt oher .Shehadear phonesonandTami a-Smi l
ewas
playi ngsol oudt hatshedi dn' tevenhearmewal kin, Itookoutoneear phonef r
om herear
causi nghert oj umpoutoff right .
Me:Jeezi tsonl yme.
Ithr ewt heear phonet oherandherf acer elaxed.
Her :GoawayYandi sa, goaway.
Me:Idi dn'tmeant o.
Her :Youkeepsayi ngt hatbutyetyoust illhur tme.Youhumi l
iatedmei nfrontofyourwi feaf ter
allthatyousai dt omel astni ght .
Me:Iam sor ry.
Her :St opokay? !St op!Youdon' tknowt hemeani ngoft hatwor d, t
hat 'swhyyouusei tso
car elessl y.Coul dn' tyougi vemeaheadsup?Di dyour eal l
yhavet odot hati nfrontofyourwi fe?
Ihaveneverf el tsol ittl
ei nmyl ife,l
ikemyf eelingsdon' tmat t
er.
Me:Theydomat ter, Ididn'tmeant ocr usht hem.
Her :Wel lyoudi d.
Me:AndIapol ogi se.
Her:Youhavehur tmesomanyt i
mesbutyetIam dumbenought ost i
lll
oveyou, whathaveyou
donet omeYandi sa?
Ilookedaway.
Me:Pl easemoveonChant elle, i
tcanneverwor k.
Her:Whathappenedt oyout aki ngmeasyourwi fe?
Me:Phumzawoul dneveragr eet ot hatandChaIr eallywantt omendt hingswi t
hmywi f
e.Did
youseeherr eact iont owar dsyout oday?I twi llneverwor k.Jeezyoucoul dhaveseenherf ace
whenIt oldhert hatIam cut tingt ieswi thyouyest er day.
Her:Doyour eallywannacutt ieswi t
hme?
Me:Ican' tr eal l
ycutt ieswi t
hyoubecauseyoumot hermyf i
rstchild.
Her:IfIdi dn' t?
Me:Theni twoul dbeeasy.
Her:Soyoudon' tloveme?
Me:Isai di tdi dn'tI ?
Her:Noyoudi dn' t,lookmei nt heeyeandt ellmet hat.Ifyoudot henIwi llgladlytrytomoveon,
notthatIhaven' tt ried.
Me:Youj ustwantmet ohur tyou.
Her:Youcan' thur tmeanymor eYandi sadon' tyougeti t?Youal r
eadyhur tmesoj ustsayit.
Ther eInowayIam sayi ngt hatoverandoveragai n, thi
si sbul l
shit.
Me:OhGodcanwedr opt his?Iam t ir
edofhear ingt hissamebul l
shitquest ionoverandover
again,ifitsnotyout heni t
sPhumza.St opni yadi ka!
Her:Sodi dyout ellheraboutyourpr oposalt ome?
Me:Yeahsheknows.
Her:Sosheknowst hatyoupr oposed?
Me:Idi dn' tpr oposej eezwher edoyougett hatshi tf r
om?
Her:Yout ryi ngt osayIwasi magi ningi t?Youar eanasshol eYandi sa.
Me:Anasshol eyoucan' tseem t ogetover ,j
eezImustbet hemostgoodl ookingasshol ethen.
Youl ovet hi sasshol e.
Shechuckl edandbr eat hedwow!
Me:Di dyour eallydat esomeoneaf terme?
Her:Itriedbuthewasn' tyou, Idesper at elywi shedhecoul dbeyou.Dr ivemei nsanej ustli
ke
youmanaget o.Nott hati tmat tersbecauseyouhaveawi feathome.
Me:Butser iousl yIwoul dli
keust obef riends, youar emyson' smot herandacol l
eague.And
obviouslyIcar eaboutyou.
Her:Idon' twantt obeyourf ri
end.
Me:Why?
Her:BecauseIl oveyou, IloveyouYandi sa.
Me:I fIcoul dspl itmysel fint ot wohal vesIwoul dbutIcan' t,Icanonl ybewi t
honeofyouand
that'
sher .
Iwillalwayshaveasof tspotf orChant ellewehavebeent hroughshi tt ogetherbutmyhear t
belongst osomeoneel senow.
Me:Pl easef indi tinyourhear ttof orgivemef oral lthatIdi dtoyou.Andwhenyouar er eadyto
bemyf riend, I
'l
lbeher e.
Shenodded, Iexhal edoutofr elief.Thatwaseasy.
Me:Nowpl easewi pet hoset ear sandshowmet hatbeaut if
ulsmi le,Ihat ehur t
ingyou.
Her:Thenst ophur tingmeandmakemehappy.
Inodded, ourdef ini ti
onsofst opwer eobvi ousl ydi fferent.Igaveherahandker chiefthengotup
andandwentt omydesk.
Me:Iwoul dl ikei ti fyouandmywi fegotal ong, itwoul dr eall
ymakemehappy.Youar ebot h
mot hers'ofmychi ldren.
Her:Youj ustpushi ngi t,shehat esme.
Me:Shehat eswhatwedi d,wehur ther .Phumzai sn' tahat efulbit
chl i
keyout hink,sheisnice.
Shewasj ustmadandbyt hel ookoft hi ngsshewasst i
llgoingt obemad, nothingIdi dorsaid
pleasedher .Notevenmyhonest y, shewasusi ngi tagainstme.Cal l
ingmeamur derer,Iknow
thatalreadysor eal l
yIdi dn'tneedhert or emi ndme.
Her:Youwantmet obef ri
endyourwi f
e?
Me:Nonotr eal ly, Ijustwantpeacebet weenyout oo.Nosl appingandr ippingof ftopswhenyou
seeeachot her .
Her:Idon' tt hinkso, shehaswhatIdon' thave.Whatwassupposedt obemi ne.
Me:Youcangetwhatshehast oobuti twontbewi t
hmeorf rom me.
Her:Thef actt hatyour aisedi tt wi cemeanst hatyoumeani t,youwanti t.
Me:Canwest opt alkingaboutt hi sandgetonwi thwor k.Haveyoueat en?
Her:No.
Me:Meei ther .Let sor derpi zza, youhavet oeat .
Her:I fitsgoi ngt obemyf avour ite.
Shebashedhereyel ashesatmeandIl aughed.
Me:Youl ookcut e.
Ishoul dn'thavesai dthat .
Her:Thankyou.
Phew!Atl eastshedi dn' tt aket hatper sonal .Itookmyphoneandor der edpi zzaanddr i
nksf r
om
Debonai r
st hengotonwi thsomewor kt opassbyt i
me.Whenouror derar rivedwedr opped
everyt hingt oeat ,wewer et al kingandl aughi ngagai n.Chadi dn'tholdgr udgesorspendhour s
mad, shehadabeaut i
ful hear tlikesomeoneIknowandl ove.
.
At4: 30wepackedupandl ef ttheof fice, shewentt opickupQhawef r
om t heday- car ewhi leI
drovehomet omymadwi fe.Ir eal lyhopeshei sokaynowbutknowi ngPhumzashewas
probabl yst il
lmad.AnywaywhenIgothomeIpar kedbehi ndmygr andf ather 'scart hengotof f
andwal kedi nt ot hehouse.
Me:Mol weni .
Them:Mol onyana.
Iwentt oputmybagdownandchangei ntosomet hingel set henwentt ot hel ounge, Phumza
wasser vingt hem f oodsosheser vedmet oot henj oinedus.Af tereat ingshet ookt hedi shest o
theki tchen.Tat omkhul uandIwentout si de, hewant edt oseet hebackyar dandof cost alk.
Him:Ther ei snot hingwr ongwi t
hhavi ngmor et hanonewomani nyourl ife.
Me:Tat omkhul u?
Thisol dman!
Him:Ihear dt het woofyouar gui ngear lier.
Me:Oh.
Hewaseavesdr oppi ng.
Him:Wehadnochoi ce, youwer eshout ing.
Me:Iknowbutpl easebut toutoft his.Iam t i
redofever yone' sadvi ces, Iwoul dn'tbei nt his
messi fIdi dn'tl i
st ent oawhol el otofpeopl ei nt hef ir
stpl ace.Thi sisbul lshit.
Him:Behonestwi thyour sel fandyourwi feandt hatot herwoman.
Me:Iam honestwi tht hem.
Him:Nah- ahi fIhear dyoupr oper lyyoucoul dn'tadmi ttonotl ovingheranymor e,stopf eedi ng
thesewomenandyour selfl ies.Mamel anyana, Iunder st andt hatyouwantyourmar riaget o
wor kbuti twontwor kunl essyouar ehonestenough.I fyoudon' tlovet hi sot herwomanj ustsay
thewor ds" Idon' tl oveyou/ her "itsqui tesi mpl e,yourwi f ewi l
lbehappyandr el
ievedonceshe
hearst hosewor ds.
TruebutIwasn' tgoi ngt osayt hatshi t,Ihavebeensayi ngi toverandoveragai n.Iftheydon' t
beli
evemet hent oobad!ButIwasovert hiscr ap.
Me:IknowbutIt oldherandIhavebeent elli
nghert hist imeandt i
meagai n, Idon'tknowwhat
shewant s.
Him:Honest y.Tel lmeaboutt hisot hergi rl
, whoi sshe?
Me:Chant ell
e, Qhawe' smot herandweal sowor kt ogether .Wewentt oschoolt ogether ,wef el
l
i
nl ovet her e.Weshar et hesamedr eam.
Him:And?
Me:Shel ef tme3mont hsbef or emyweddi ng.
Henodded.
Him:I sshepr et ty?
Ilaughed.
Me:Shei sn' tpr et ty,shei sbeaut iful.Ithoughtshewast hemostbeaut ifulgi r
lIhaveeverseen
tatomkhul uandshest il
lis.Shehasabeaut if ulhear tbutshei scr azy, int hemostsexyand
accept abl eway.
Him:Hmmm
Me:Shehasabeaut ifulandwar m smi l
e, Ithi nkshei smi sunder stoodt hough.
Him:By?
Me:Mypar ent s, theyneverl ikedherbecauseofherf atherandt hewayshesomet imesbehave
anddr ess.Theyal soj udgedherbyherf at her 'sbadhabi tsbutshei sn'tnot hi ngl i
kehi m.
Phumzat hi nksshei ssomesor tofbi tchbutshei sn't ,
thet hingwi thChai st hatshel ovesme
uncondi ti
onal l
yandsheput si toutt here.Shewear sherhear tonhersl eevesandshedoesn' t
careasl ongasi twor ksf orher .Herst epmot her ,shet hinkshei sst upidandawhol elotof
thi
ngs.Iwi shIcoul dgi veherwhatshewant s, makehersmi leandl aughl ikesheusedt o.Make
herhappy.Shedeser vessomuchhappi nessaf teral lthatshehasbeent hr ough.
Him:Thenwhydon' tyou?
Me:What ?Makeherhappy?( henodded)It hi nkIam doi ngt hatr ightnow, itmi ghtnotl ookor
feelthatwayatt hemomentbutl aterwhenshef indsl ove, accept anceandnotr ejection.She
willthankme, ther ei snohappi nesswi thme.LookatPhumza, shei smi ser ableandangr y.
Him:Don' tbeatyour sel fupaboutsomet hingyoucan' tchange, weal lmakemi stakes.Ther eis
nomanualt hatcomeswi th' howt ol ivelife',wemakemi stakesandwel ear n.
Me:Yeahbutnotr epeat edlyl ikeme.
Him:It hink, wel lIhavebeeni nlovebef oreandyouseet hatspar klet hatyouhadi nyoureye
whenyouf irstspokeaboutCha. ..What '
shernameagai n?
Me:Chant elle.
Him:Yesher , i
tmeanssomet hing.Onl yyouknowwhati tis, stopgoi ngbackandf orthbet ween
them.Deci de, nopr essur e.It ol dyourf athert hever ysamet hi ngwhenhehadasi mi larpr oblem.
Heneverment ionedt hat .
Me:Dad?
Him:Yeshi m, hewasmar riedwhenher eal isedt hathedoesn' tlovet hewomanchosenf orhi m
byhi spar ent s.Hel eftt hewomanandwentbackt ot hel oveofhi sl ife,what '
shappeni ngr ight
nowi thappenedwi thyourf at her .Heshoul dn' thavechosenawi fef oryoubecauseheknew
exact lyhowt hingsal waysgowr ongi nthi st ypeofmar r
iage.
Me:ButIdol ovePhumza, shei st hemot herofmychi ldren.
Him:Maybeyouar ei nl ovewi ththei deaofl ovi ngheranddoi ngr i
ghtbyher ,youdon' twantt o
hur therl i
keyousayyouhur tt hisChan. ..EweyenabutIam j ustsayi ng.
Me:NoIl oveher .Iwantt obeabet termanf orhert hanIwast oChant elle.
Him:Whycan' tyoubeabet termanf orChant elle?ImeanPhumzadoesn' tknowt het ypeof
manyouwer ebef or eherbutChant elledoesandshest i
lllovesyou.Whi chi smor et hanIcan
sayf oryourwi f
e, Iam notsayi ngt hatshedoesn' tloveyou.ButIj ustdon' tt hinki t
senough
whi chi swhyyoukeepgoi ngbackt oChant el l
e.
Me:Wel lIhavedeci dedt ost aywi thPhumza, tr
yt obeabet termanf orher .
Him:Doessheknoworseet hi s?
Idon' tthinksobecauseshei si nt her er i
ghtnowmadatme, hel iteral l
ythr ewmeoutear lier.But
Inodded.
Him:Woul dyour at herl iveal i
et hanl ivei npol ygamy?
Me:WoahIam notapol ygami st!AndIam def i
nitelynotl ivingal i
e.
Thet houghtoft aki ngChant elledi dcr ossmymi ndbutno, geez!Fuckno!I twoul dbet oomuch
forPhumit ohandl e, sheal readyhat edher .Andt heyar eal readycal l
ingeachot hernames,
physi callyf i
ght ing.Iwant edpeacei nmyl i
fenotmor edr ama.
Him:Yousur ethi nkandactl ikeone, goingbackandf orthbet weent wowomen.Andyouar e
undeci ded.
Me:No!Not atomkhul uPhumzawoul dleaveme, shedoesn' thaveanyboneofunder standi ngin
her.Shei si nsecur e.Andi fshel eavesshewi lltakemyboyswi thher .
Henodded.
Him:Sowhenam Imeet ingyourol destsonandt hisChan?
Chan? !Ilaughedj eezt hisol dman!
Me:AtZet hu' sweddi ngmaybe.
Him:Iwantt oseehi m now, Iwantt oseei fhei sr eal l
yyourson.
Me:Hei s, hel ooksl ikeus.
Him:ButIwantt oseehi mt oday, Iam notl eavingwithoutseei nghi m.
Me:Hei sathi smot her 'shouse.
Him:Uhm youunder standt hathehast obeaDl aminiright ?Thathehast ol iveundert hesame
roofasyou?NoDl ami nihei rissupposedt ogr owupunderanot hersur nameandhome.Hehas
toknowhi sr oot s, wher ehecomesf rom andwhohei s.
Imustadmi tIhavenevergi vent hatat hought .
Me:Iknow.
Him:Thenwhatar eyoust il
lwai ti
ngf or ?
Me:Whatam Iwai tingf or?
Him:Lobol aumt wana.Payt hedamagest henchangehi ssur nameandt akehi m.
Me:Ican' ttakeQhawef rom hi smot her ,i
twoul dkil
lher.Ial r
eadyhur thersomanyt imes, took
almostever ythingawayf r
om her ,Qhawei sallshehas.Iwontt akehi mf rom her .Hei sherl i
ght
ofhope, itwoul ddest royher .
Him:Buthi ssur namehast obechanged, introducedt ot heancest or s.
Me:OkayI 'l
lt alkt ohi smot heraboutt hat .
Him:Bef or eyourweddi ng.
Me:Okayt amkhul u.
Him:Gof et chhi m, Iwantt omeethi m.
Me:Now?
Him:Hayi tomor row, ofcosnow.Yandi saheshoul dknowhi sfather '
sf ami ly,heal readymi ssed
hisgrandf at her '
sf uner al.
Me:Okay.
Iwenti nsi det ot akemykeyst henwentt of etchQhawef rom hi smot her '
shouse.Shedi dn'
t
mi ndhiml eavi ngj ustasl ongasIwasgoi ngt obri
nghi m back.
.
WhenIgothomeIpar kedt hengotof fwi thQhaweandwewenti nsidet hehouse.Thent ot
he
backyar dbecauset hat '
swher etat omkhul uwas.Hewassmoki ngandf rom t hesmel lofit,
it
wasweed.Whenhehear dust alkingheputi tof ft
hendr ankt hebr andyorwhi skeyorwhat ever
hehadi nhi shand.
Me:Ar en'tyougoi ngt obedr ivingt oni ght ?
Tamkhul u:Iwi ll
.
Me:Whenyouar ei nt oxicat ed?
Tamkhul u:Iam notdr unk, itwasj usthal fagl ass.AndIdon' tanswert oyouboy.
Ishookmyhead, hiseyeswentdownt oQhawe.
Tamkhul u:Whoi sshe/ he?
Me:Qhawet hisisyourgr eatgr andf ather , tat
omkhul uthi si sQhawe, myson.
Tamkhul u:I ssheahe?( Inodded)Thenwhydoeshehavesuchl onghai r?Cutt hi sthingman,
hei saman.Andhei syel low, youar edar k.
Ilaughed, i
tst r
ueQhawel ookedl ikeal it
tlegi rl
.Hewasador able.
Me:Hi smot heri sami xedr acet hat '
swhyhel ooksyellow, sheisyel l
owt oo.Andshel ovesto
keephi shai rliket hi s.
Isaidtouchi nghi ssof tcur lyaf ro.Idoubthehasevergot tenahai rcut ,
maybei twasaboutt i
me
hecuthi shai rbutIl ovedi tt hiswayt oo.Sohewasgoi ngt orockt hishai rforawhi le.
Tamkhul u:Ut yaabel ungu?
Ichuckled, dadt ookhi sdi r t
ymout hf rom t hismanr i
ghther e.Hi sfat her ,
her emi ndedmeao
muchofhi m buthewassl ight lycool ert handad.
Me:Notanymor et at omkhul u, Iam mar r
iednow.
Henoddedandl ookedatQhaweagai n, hewasbusypl ayi ngagameonmyphonepayi ng
absolutelynoat tent iont omeorus.
Him:NguZi zi ephel ele, uyazal al omt ana.Ukukhuphi leunj aloqhal ibalael i.(her eall
yl ookslike
you)
Me:Yeah.
Him:Wher ei sshekeyena?
Me:Atherhouse.
Him:Hmm whyi sn' tsheher e?Weshoul dmeethert oo.
Ichuckl ed.
Me:Phumzawoul ddi vorcemei fIbr oughtherher e.
Especial l
yaf tert oday.
Him:Under standabl ebutdon' tletawomancont rolyou.
Me:Shedoesn' tt at omkhul u.
Helookedatme, hedi dn'tbel ieveme.Hechuckl edandshookhi shead.
Him:Youseei nmydaysIusedt ot r
avel alotandeyt hewomenIusedt obewi th,beautif
ul!I
wasachar mer ,womenusedt ot hr owt hemsel vesatme, theyst i
lldo.
Me:Yeahr ightt atomkhul u.
Him:Iam t el l
ingyouwhi te,col our ed, black, indiani tdi dn' tmatter!Souf uzi
lenyana.
Me:Wher ear et heynow?
Him:Somear emar ri
edbutIst illseesome.
Me:I nthisol daget amkhul u?
Him:Iam nott hatol d, i
samaanddoest hewor k.
Il
aughed.
Me:Anddoesmakhul uknow?
Him:YesbecauseImar ri
edt hem t henbui lthousesf ort hem i ndifferentplaces,your
grandmot her .Theoneyoumeti smyf irstwi fe.
Whatt he? !Idi dn' tknowhewasapol ygami st ,achar mermaybebecausehewasal ways
surroundedbywomenatdad' sf uner al andt heyseemedt oenj oyhi scompany.Maybet hose
weret hewi ves.
Him:Don' tlooksosur prisedyouwi l
lmeett hem onedayandmychi ldren.Buttheywer ethereat
yourfat her '
sf uner al.
Me:Ohwowhowmanydoyouhave?
Him:20i ncl udi ngyourf athersol eofhavi ngmanyki ds, lufuzo.ButIhave19now.
Me:Icanseet hat .Doyousat i
sf yal lofyourwi vesandki ds?
Iwasj usti nt erest ednj e.
Him:Myki dsar eol dnowsot heyf endf orthemsel vesandof cos, Idoseeal lmywi ves.Ihavea
weekf oreachoft hem.
Me:Whodoyoul ovemor e?
Him:I t
sbal anced, Ican' taf fordt ol oveanyonemor e.
Me:Andyousuppor talloft hem?
Him:Yes.
Me:Wi t
hwhatmoney?
Him:Ihust le.
Me:Soyouar est illintocr ime?
Him:I '
lldieacr imi nal.
Me:Justl ikeyourson?
Him:Hechoset hatr out e, i
thadnot hingt odowi thme.
Me:Butyouwi lldi eacr i
mi nal justl i
kehi m?
Him:Iguessso, itst heonl yt hingIknow.
Me:Iam notj udgi ngi tsjustcr azy.
Him:Iknow.
Me:Sowhydon' tyoul i
vewi thal lyourwi ves, shoul dn'ti tbet heeasi estway?
Him:Whydi dn' tyourf atherl ivewi thhi sf ir
stwi fe?
Isti
llcan'twr apmyheadar oundt hat , dad?Asecondwi fe?Lor d!
Me:Whoi ssheandwher ei sshe?Whydi dn' theevert al kabouther ?
Him:It hinkyoushoul daskyourmot hert hatbutshewasatt hef uner al
.
Inodded.
Me:I '
llaskherevent houghi tsver yhar dt obel ievet hathehadasecondwi f
e.
Hechuckl edandl ookedatQhawe.
Him:I '
llbeexpect ingyourcal labouthi swel comi ngcer emonyandhi smot herhast obet here
andsodoesyourwi fe.Youwi llt alkt ot hem aboutt hei mpor tanceofkeepi ngthepeace
betweent hem.
Me:Ewet atomkhul u.
Him:I '
llbet aki ngmyl eavenow, thinkaboutwhatwespokeabout .
Me:Ewet amkhul u, letswal kgr andpat ohi scar .
Ref erri
ngt oQhawewhocompl etelyignor edme, Isnat chedmyphoneawayf rom hi m.He
coul dn'tevenpl ayt hedamnt hing, hekeptoncr ushingt hecaroverandoveragai n.Hel ooked
upatmewi thshockwr ittenal loverhi sfaceorhewasf r i
ghtened.
Me:Let swal kgr andpaout .
Henoddedandhel douthi shands, Ifiguredhewant edt hephonesoIgavei ttohi m.Hesl owl y
followedaf t
ermeandgr anddadasIwaswal ki
nghi mt ohi scarout side,Imovedmycaroutof
thewaysohecoul ddr i
veout .
.
.
Phumza:
Yandi sa' sgr andpawasout sidewai ti
ngf ormypar ent stoj oinhi m, i
twast imef ort hem t ol eave
andmyhear twasachi ng.I tsalwayssadseei ngyourl ovedonegoaway.
Mom:Babybest rongokay?Don' tcrywear egoi ngtobeaphonecal laway.
Me:Andmi l
esaway.
Her :Thatt oobutdon' tfocusyourener gyont hat,yourmar ri
ageneedst obefixed.Youcan' t
allowt hatgi rltocomebet weenyouandyourhusband.
Me:OhmamaIdon' tknowwhatt odo, whati fher eal l
yl eavesme?WhatIhel ovesher ?
Her :Tr ustyourhusband, don' tpushhi m away.
Me:Idon' tknowi fIcant rusthi m mamanotaf terwhathedi d.
Her :That '
swhatwi lldr ivehi m backi nt oherar ms.
"Okayf ineI '
m goi ngt oherr i
ghtnowanddoyouknowwhatshei sgoi ngtodowhenIgett here?
Acceptmewi t
hopenandwar m arms, acceptmyr i
diculousapol ogy.Wear egoi ngt oki ssand
maybeI 'l
l makel ovet oher ,Iwillbebet weenherski nnyl egsagai nandshei sgoi ngt ol ovei t.
Andyou, you'llbeher ecr yi ngyoureyesout .
"Hi swor dspl ayinmymi nd.
"Iwontcomebackt oyournaggi ngass" ,buthei sher e.Hecamebackt omynaggi ngassbutI
j
ustcoul dn'tt r
usthi m, notwhi letheyf uckenshar eachi l
dandj ob.Thesamedr eam j ob!God
whyme? !Inoddedandhuggedher .
Dad:Comeonmamakhewehavet ogonowt at'Dlami niiswai t
ing.
Mom:Justami nut e.
Dad:Phumzai snotababyanymor eandyoucan' thol dherhandt hroughever ything, shehast o
wor kthingsoutf orhersel f.Learnr espectmygi r
l,youl ackingi tnow.
Yandi sapushedmet ot hisdi srespect fulwi f
e, whenhecheat edonmewi t
hChant ell
ehedi d.We
broket hehugandInoddedt omyf ather.
Mom:Don' tmi ndhi m butr especthi m, youdon' twanthi mt ogot oher .
".
..Shewi llacceptmewi thopenandwar m ar ms" ,hi
swor dscrepti ntomymi ndagai n.Inodded
tomom, Icoul ddot hi s.Icoul drespecthi m, Icouldl ovehi m.Waybet t
erthanChant elleever
did/does.Icandoi t, Idon' twanthi mt oleaveme.WhydoIevenhavet ocompet ewi tht hat..
..
woman?
.
.
Yandi sa:
Af terseei ngourpar ent sof fwewal kedbacki ntothehouse, Isatont hecouchwi thQhawenext
tome.Hewasst illpl ayingt hecargameandhesucked.
Me:Letmeshowyouhowt oplay.
Hegavemet hephoneandl eanedagai nstmychest .
"Ishespendi ngt heni ght? "
, Phumzaaskedwal kingint ot helounge.
Me:Nopehi smot herwant shi m homebef orehi sbedt ime.
Shesatdownont hesi ngl ecouchandbr oughtherkneesupt oherchest ,putt
ingherf eetont he
couch.
Her :Sowhataboutgym?Ar ewest il
lgoing?
Ilookedather ,isn' tshemadanymor e?
Me:Doyouwantt ogo?
Justt est ingt hewat er s.
Her :Yeahunl essyoudon' twantt oanymor e.
Me:Awkwar d!
Shesmi ledandQhawesl appedmyhandssoIt ilt
edt hephonet othesi des.
Me:Li ket his,doyout hinkyoucandoi t?
Hel ookedatmewi t
hhi sexci t
edf ace, Ifel
tsopr oudt obehi sfather.
Hi m:Yes.
Me:Yeswhat ?
Hi m:Yesdaddy.
Ismi ledandki ssedhi sf orehead.
Me:Tr ynott ocr ash.
Hi m:Yesdaddy.
IlookedatPhumza.
Me:Iwoul dlovet ogot oo.
Maybewecanbondovert his.
Her :WhatdoIneed?
Me:Let sstar ttomor r
ow, west i
llhavet ogetyouagym at tir
e.
Shenoddedt hengotupt hemi nuteshehear doneoft heboyscr ying.Ist oodupandwentt o
checkaswel l
, Iguesshewashungr ybecausewhenhi smot herputherbr eastinhismout hhe
suckedonf ordearl ife.Thesear ethemoment sIf eelaliveandpr oudat ,Iam af ather!
!Iquickl
y
tookPhumza' sphoneandsnappedpi cturesoft hem.
Me:Smi l
emyl ove.
Shel ookedupandsmi l
ed.Hersmi l
et houghandt hosebi geyes, gosht hosel i
ps.
Me:Beaut i
ful.
Her :Yousmi l
ing.
Am I ?
Me:Iguess.Iam sor ryaboutear li
er,Ididn'tfuckher .Shedi dn'
tevent ouchme, Ididn'
ttouch
herei ther.Idi dn'tevent ry.
Her :Why?
Me:Imeani tPhumi ,
Iwantourmar r
iaget owor k.Iwantt obef ait
hfultoyou, Iwanttobuildour
trustagai n.Bui l
dourl ove,ourmar r
iage.
Her :Soyoudon' twantt omar ryher?
Me:Canwest opt al
kingaboutheraf t
ert his?(shenodded)Becauseweneedt ofocuson
buildingus.
Her :Youdi dn' tgi vemeananswer .
Me:Phumzayouneedt ost opwi ththese50quest ions,noIam notmar ryingher .
Shesmi led, Iwal kedovert oherandki ssedherf oreheadt henherlips.Weshar edaki ss,t
hatI
l
oveyout ypeofki ss.

65
Phumza:
Iwokeupsor ebody, i
twasi nknotsthesquatsIwasdoi ngyesterdayyer
r!Mymuscl eswer eall
ti
edup, Icoul dn'tevengetoutofbed.Nott hatIcouldn'
tbutbecauseIwasl azyandt ir
ed, we
sleptl
atel astnight.Yandi sa,BuchuleandMandl awer eanoisycrowdandt heydidn'
twantus
tobedwi thoutt hem.Theywer ecoolthoughandf unnywhent heyweredrunk,Yandisadi dn'
t
stickt
ohi swor dofhavi ngonebeer .Onebecamet wothen3and4andt herestishistory.Ifel
t
coldli
psonmyneck, j
ustbehi ndmyear .Icoul
dn'thel
pbutsmi leandtur
ntof acehisdirecti
on,
hepeckedmyl ipst hennose.
Him:Mor ni ngMr sYandi saQhaweDl ami ni
.
Me:Theoneandonl y.
Him:Ti l
leternit
y, you,meandt heki
ds.
Me:Oursoccert eam.
Him:Oursoccert eam.
Me:Ar en'tyouhungover ?
Him:Ionl yhad4beer s.
Me:Butyouwer edr unk.
Him:Iwast i
psynotdr unksthandwa.
Me:What '
ssoni ceaboutdr i
nking?
Heshr ugged.
Him:Howi syourbody?
Me:Sor e.
Him:Wantamassage?
Me:Fr om you?
Him:Whoel se?Li eonyourst omachst handwasam.
Me:Canyouevenmassage?
Him:Idon' tknow.
Hegotof fbedandt ookbi o-oilfr om thecabi net .
Me:Wearyourunder wearpl ease.
Wesl eptnakedexceptf orthosedayshewasn' thome.
Him:Hayi sukawhatwi l
lIdot oyou?
Isleptonmyt ummyandhesatont opofmyt highs, thebi o-oi
ldr opsf eltsocol dagai nstmy
backandhi shandswor kedmagi conmyback.Hi shandswer ewar m onmyski n,hel aughed
everytimeImoaned.Iwassoaki ngwet ,Iwast ur nedonandIwant edhi mi nmeasi nl i
ke
yesterday.Buthi si nt entionswer emadecl earf rom t hegetgo, hewasn' tgoi ngtor eli
evemeof f
thisterriblesi tuat ion.
Him:Tur nar ound.
Hegotof fmesoIt ur nedar ound.
Him:Jeezl ookatyoureyes, sexy.
Me:Don' t.
Hesmi ledanddr oppedaf ewdr opsonmybr east sandst omacht henmassaged.
Me:Thi sisnomassage.
Hechuckl edandbendedt oki ssmyl i
ps.
Him:Wher eel sedoesi thur t?
Me:Myl egs.
Heki ssedmynosef ollowedbymyl i
pst henneck, collarbone, bet weenmybr eastst hen,
stomach, bellybut t
on.Ihel dhi sf aceoneachsi desandpul l
edhi m upbuthedi dn'tbudge.
Him:Pat iencemyl ovepat ience.
Me:Idon' thaveany.
Him:Thenhowdi dyouwai tf or2year stomar ryme?
Her emovedt hebedcoverandmassagedmyt hi ghs.
Me:Yandi sapl easest op.
Hechuckl edandbendedmykneest henopenedmyl egsandgotbet weenmyl egs.Hei nserted
himsel fsl owl y, Lor dhavemer cy!Itfeltsogr eat .Het henpul l
edoutt heni nsertedhi msel fagain,
Iwr appedmyl egsar oundhi swai st
.Hechuckl edandki ssedmynoset henst art
edmovi ngin
andoutofmesl owl y.
Me:St opt easi ng.
Him:Thi si scal l
edmaki ngl ovemyl ove.
Heki ssedmyl i
pst henuppedhi spaceal ittl
e, Iunwr appedmyl eggi ngsandt ri
edt omeethi s
movement shal fway.Hegr oaned.
Him:GodPhumzababe. ..
Heuppedhi spaceal ittl
eagai nandwentdeeper ,hittingmysensi tivespot .Icouldn'thel pbut
moanl ouder ,itf eltsoamazi ng.Hepul l
edmyassof ft hebedandhi smovement squi ckened.
Him:JeezPhumzaIl oveyou.
Me:I. .
Ireachedmycl imaxunexpect edly,her eachedhi saf terme.Heki ssesmyl ips.
Him:Openyoureyesbabe.
Iopenedmyeyesandl ookedathi m, hewassweat ing.
Him:Il oveyou, youar eenoughf orme.Iswearyouar e.
Iwr appedmyar msar oundhi sneckandpul ledhi mt omyl evel.Ourl i
psmetandweshar eda
kiss.
Me:Il oveyou.
Him:Iam sor ryf orhur t
ingyou, evermaki ngyoudoubtmyl ovef oryou.Forbr i
ngingat hird
personi nourmar r
iage, fortreat ingyoul ikeshi t
.
Me:Shhh
Him:Iam sor ryPhumi .
Inodded.
Him:Iwonderwhyyouar ecr ying.
Me:Shutup.
Hesmi l
edandki ssedmyl i
pst henr estedhisheadonmychestandwr appedhi sarmsar ound
mywai st.
Him:I fwedi dn' thaveki dswewoul dst ayinbedthewhol eday.
Me:Andwor k?
Him:Iwoul dcal l i
nsi ck.
Me:Andwhatwoul dwedoi nbedt hewhol eday?
Him:Pr act i
cemaki ngababy.
Ilaughed.
Me:Butwehaveki dsandyouhavet ogetupandgetr eadyf orwor k.
Him:Iknowbutf irst.
..
Hemovedhi swai stinci rclest henej ectedandgotof fme.
Him:Tur nar oundbabe.
Me:HaYayagogetr eadyf orwor k.
Iwant edt obutwehadt ogetup, Iwasn' ttr
yingtogetpr egnantagain.
Him:Thi shungr y?
Hepoi ntedt ohi msel f,ohGod!Ineverr eali
sedthathewast hathuge, Ilookeddownatmysel f.
Howdoest hatf itinther e?Hel aughedandgotof fthebed.
Him:Youst illt i
ghtdon' twor ry.
Me:Yandi sa!
Ithrewapi l
lowathi m,hel aughedkakhul uandIjoinedi n.
Him:Comehaveashowerwi thme.
Me:Ihavet oi ronyourcl othes.
Him:OhmyGod!Youhavebecomesost i
ngy!
Hedi sappear edi nt othebat hr oom.GodYandi saifonlyyoumeantt hethingst hatyousay.Igot
outofbedandwor eacl eanpant ythet ooktheshor t
shewaswear i
ngyest erday,Iworethem
andhi svestt henwentt ot hebat hroom.Ni ggawasi nagoodmood, hewasevenwhi st
li
ng.Isat
ont hetoiletseatandpeed.
Me:Whatar eyouwear ingt oday?
Him:Babe? !
Me:Whatwi ll youwear ?
Igotupandf l
ushed.
Him:Hmm mycar amel br ownpant s.
Me:Thet ightones?
Heopenedt heshowerdoor .
Him:Theyar enott hattightbabywhyudl al
angam?
Igiggled.
Me:Okay, and?
Him:Whi t
eshi r
t,not iet oday.
Me:Okay.
Him:Thankyou.
Me:Pl easur e.
Hecl osedt heshowerdoorbutopenedagai n.
Him:Youl ooksosexyi nt hose.
Me:Mci m udl al angam.
Him:Ser ious, youshoul dwearmor eofyourman' sshor tsandt -
shirts.Theyl ookgoodonyou.
Me:Thankyou.
Hebl ewmeaki sst hencl osedt hedooragai nandcont inuedwhi stl
ing.Iwentt oourroom and
tookhi sclothest henwentt oi ront hem inthelaundryr oom.If oundZet huint her
eironi
nga
shirt.
.
Me:Mor ning, It houghtyouguysl eftalr
eady.
Her:UhnoIdon' twor kanymor e,Ihaveser vedmynot i
ceper i
odsoIam af reewomannow.
Me:Iwoul ddoanyt hingt owor k,itwoul dhelpgetmymi ndoffthingsal i
tt
le.
Her :Yandi sai sst il
l givingyougr ief?
Me:Il ovehi m ne?ButIdon' tt hinkhel ovesmeasmuchasIl ovehi m.
Her :Butl astni ghtIt houghtyouguyswer ehappy, youwer ei nsepar abl e,hecoul dn'tgethi s
eyesof fyou.Andmi nut esagoyouwer ebot hmoani ngeachot her s' names.
OhmyGod!Whoel sehear dt hat ?
Me:Hei ssoundeci dedZet hu, Iknowhei syourbr otherbuthei ssof ullofshi t
.
Her :Butwhydoyousayt hat ?
Shegavemet hei ronsoIi ronedhi scl othes.
Me:BecauseZet huhei s.
Her :TheChant elledr ama?Godt hatgi rlisf ullofdr ama.
Me:Canyoubel ievet hatIhadt opr omi sehi mt hatIwi lltryt ogetal ongwi t
hher ?
Her :Heaskedyout o?
Me:Yeah.
Her :Yandi sai smad, hecheat edonyouwi tht hegi rlwhatt hehel liswr ongwi thhim?
Me:Idon' tthinkt hisi sgoi ngt owor k.
Her :Comeongi r
lyoucan' tgi veupont his, youhavewor kedsohar dt omaket hingswor k.
Me:That '
st het hingZet hu, Ihavewor kedsohar dandhej usthadt ot hrowi tallaway.Iopened
upmyhear ttohi m andhest il
l wentaheadandsl eptwi thsomeoneel se.Somet i
mesIt hinkhe
car esf orChant ell
emor et hanhecar esf ormeandi thur ts.Hel iesZet hu, it
shar dtobelieve
anyt hingt hatcomesf r
om hi m now.
War m, fr
esht ear ssl idedownmycheeks.
Her :Heydon' tdot hist oyour sel f ,
don' tcr yoverhi sst upidass.Ican' tbel ievet hatYandi sacan
besost upi dandsel fish.
Me:Icoul dn'tbel ievei tei t
her .
Her :Heyyoudon' thavet odoanyt hingyoudon' twantt odo, don' tl ethi m wal kalloveryou.Put
yourf ootdownwheni tcomest ot hatst upidbabymamaorwal kawayf rom t his.
Me:Il ovehi m.
Her :Iknowyoudobabebuti fyouar ethinki ngandcr yingl iket hist heni tsnotheal thy.Itsnot
heal thyf oryouandt hoseki ds, wowuYandi sahei sonesel fishman.Af t
ergi vinghim sucha
hugeandbeaut if
ulgi ft
,yousavedyour selff orhi m, youmar riedhi m, l
ovedhi m, r
espectedhi m,
cookedandyoust il
lcookf orhi m.Youcl eanupaf terhi m, Iknowhecanbeamess.Gi rlyou
havebeenpat ientwi thhi m.
Me:Buthest i
llcheat ed, hest i
lll ovesher .
Her :Hu- huhI '
lltalkt ot heasshol eIcal l abr ot her ,I'
lltellhim exact lywhatIt hinkofhi m and
whathei sdoi ngt oyou.
Me:Don' tplease, leavei tatt hat .Hedoesn' twantpeopl et ogeti nvol vedi nourbusi ness.
Her :Na- ahheshoul dl ear nt or espectandappr eci ateyou.I fIwer eyouIwoul dn'tbedoi ngal lof
this, Iwoul dl ethi mi ronhi sowncl othes, cookhi sownmeal s.
Me:Andpushhi mr ighti ntoherar ms?
Her :Geezgi r
lyoucan' tlivei nf earoft hat, wher ei she?
Shehangedt heshi rtshewasi roningandwentt ot hedoor .
Me:Zet hupl easedon' t
.Zet hu!
Itur nedof ft hei ronandf ollowedaf terher .
.
.
Yandi sa:
Zet hubadgedi nt omyr oom shout ing, "
Whatt hef ucki swr ongwi thyouYandi sa?!"
Me:Whatt hef ucki swr ongwi thme?Whatt hef ucki swr ongwi thyou? !Iam notdr essed
damni t!
Zet hu:I t
snotl ikeIhaven' tseenyourassbef ore!
Iwor emyboxer sandwr appedat owelar oundmywai stthent ur nedt ol ookather .Phumzawas
standi ngnextt oher .
Zet hu:Youhadusal lfool ed!
Me:Hadyoual lfool ed?Whatar eyouonabout ?
Phumza:Zet hupl easedon' t.
Zet hu:NoPhumza!No!Yandi sayouar emybr otherandIl oveyoubutt hewayyout reatt hi
s
poorgi r l
.Whatdi dshedot oyou?
Me:Zet huyouar emysi sterandIl oveyoubuti fyoudon' tgetyourski nnyassoutofmyr oom
ri
ghtnow. ..
Zet hu:Whatwi llyoudo? !
Me:Iwi l
lsl apyou, Iam noti nthemoodf oryourshi t.
Zet hu:Idar eyou!
OfcosIwasn' tgoi ngt osl apher ,Ijustwant edhert ogetoutofmyr oom.
Me:Don' tchal lengemeZet hu.
Zet hu:Iam notLubanzi whoj ustl ookedatyouumnyel a!AndIam notPhumzawhoyouwal kal
l
over .AndIam def initelynott hesl utyoucal lyourbabymama, Iam notscar edofyouYandi sa.
Woul dyoul i
kei tifsomeonet reatedmet hewayyout reather ?
Me:Phumzagetyourf riendoutofmyr oom andcl oset hedoor .
Phumzal ookedatZet hu.
Phumza:Pl easeZet hu.
Zet hu:No!Notunt ilyouanswermyquest i
on.
Me:NoIwoul dn'tlikei t.
Zet hu:Thenwhydoyout reatherl iket hi s?Whydoyout reatherlikeyourdoormat ?
Me:Adoormat ?AdoormatPhumza?Real ly?It reatyoul i
keadoormat ?Iwal kal loveryou?
Thi sbul lshitandi ti swayt ooear l
yf ort hiski ndofexchangeofwor ds.Wher ear emycl othes?
Zet hu:RhaYandi sa!Uyakhal aomnyeumt anawenauzombuzai mpahl a?
Me:WhatmustIdo?Cr ywi t hher ?Ni yagezani na.( t
hebot hofyouar emad)
Iwasshockedandconf usedaboutt hiswhol ear gument ,whatdi dIdonow?
Zet hu:Wow!Youar easel fishsonofabi tch!
Me:Don' tyoudar er efert omymot herasabi tch!Maybeyour sbutnotmi neokay?Notmi ne!
Nowgetoutofmyway, Ineedt ogett owor k.
Phumzaqui cklymovedoutofmyway, Ihel dherwr istt henpul l
edherwi thmet ot helaundr y
room.Myshi rtandpant swer en'tironedsoIgotonwi tht hat.
Me:Tal kt ome.
Phumza:Iam sor ry.
Me:Nonodon' tapol ogi se,tellmeexact lywhatyout ol dZet hut hatgotheral lfi
redup.Layyour
feelingsoutf ormet hesamewayyoul aidt hem outf orher .
Shesni ffed.
Me:OkayPhumzawhatdoyouwantmet odot omakeyouhappyagai n?Becauser ightnowI
am outofi deas.
Her :Not hi ng.
Hervoi cewashuskyandshaky.
Me:Not hing?Not hingr eally?
Ilookedatherandshenodded.
Me:Okay.
Iwor emypant st heni ronedt heshi r
t.
Her :Your obbedt hat ,itsst i
llcreased.
Me:Ohsoyoucanvoi ceoutyourf eel i
ngsaboutmypant sbutyoucan' ttel
lmehowyouf eel,
what '
seat i
ngyouup, whywear ear gui ng?HehPhumzayouamazeme.Youamazememt wana
kaMaj ol ashame.YouamazemeMr sDl ami ni,youdo.
Iputont heshi rt.
Her :Thati sal socr eased.
Me:Whatt hef ucki swr ongwi t
hyou?I tsmyf uckenshi rtsoyi yeke!
Her :Areyouangr ywi thme?
Me:Whatdoyout hink?Phumzayouar emar ri
edt omenotZet hu, Iam notmar riedt oZet hu
eitherift her ei sanyt hingt hatIwi lllistent o.Ithast ocomef r
om you, sibonisane.Idon' thave
powermor ethanyou, wear eequal s.I ft herei sanyt hi ngyoudon' tli
keyouneedt ovoicei tout
notuseZet hu.Ineedyout obehonestwi thmeandst opnoddi ngl i
keaf ucken2yearol dwho
can' tunder standawor dcomi ngoutofmymout h.
Her :Thesamewayyouwer ehonestwi thme?Whendi dyour ealisethatyouar emar riedt ome?
Okaywewer eget tingsomewher eevent houghIdi dn'tl i
kewher ewewer eheadi ng.Buti fshe
want edt ot alkabouti tagai n, getr eassur ancet henIwaswi ll
ingt ogot her eonel astt i
me.
Me:Ihi det het ruthf rom youbecauseIknewyoucoul dn' thandl ei t
!
Her :Your ightIcan' t
.Ican' thandl et hef actt hatyoul oveher , t
hatyout hi nkofher , thatyou
shar eachi ldoradr eam wi thher !Ihat et hef actt hatyoucheat edonme, Ihat et hef actt hatyou
brokemyt rust ,thatyoul iedt omeandyoust il
lcont inuet ol i
e.Ihat et hef actt hatIcan' tt rust
youanymor e,thatIcan' thel pbutwonderwhatyoudoi nthatof ficebehi ndcl oseddoor swi th
her .Ihat et hef actt hatIam mar riedt oyou, thatIam soi nl ovewi t
hyoubutyouar ei nlovewi t
h
anot her !Ihat et hef actt hatIcan' that eyounomat t
erhar dmuchIt ry.Ihat et hatIcan' tf or give
youandf or getwhatyoudi d.Ihat et hef actt hatever yt imeyouwal koutoft hatdoorIf eelso
bet rayed, Ican' thandl eit.
Inodded.EvenIcoul dn'thandl ethet ruth.Butshewasmi stakenaboutonet hing, Iwasn' tinlove
withChant elleIwasi nlovewi thher .Iwi l
lal waysl oveQhawe' smot herbutIam i nl ovewi thmy
wife, If ellinlovewi t
hhert hemi nut eIsawherwal ki
ngdownt heai sle.Ihel dmybr eat hand
crossedmyf i
nger sandpr ayedt hatnobodyobj ectsorst opst hatweddi ng, yeahImessedup.I
gett hatandIser i
ousl ydon' tknowhowmanyt imesIshoul dapol ogizet oheri nor derf orhert o
seet hatIam f orherandheronl y.Yeahndi phazami seki leendl eleni,Igotconf usedbutwho
doesn' t?Weal lgetconf usedoncei nawhi l
e, Ifellforever ythi ngandIhur therbutt hatdoesn' t
meanIdon' tloveher .Ifellinl ovewi t
hher ,notChant el l
e.Iwasneveri nlovewi thChabutIdi d
l
oveherandt hatl ovewasgoi ngt ost ayi nmyhear tfor ever ,shepr epar edmef ort hiski ndof
l
ove.Gavemeagi ftnoamountofmoneycoul dbuy, excusemef orfallingf orever ythi ngmy
mi ndt hought .Iam humanImakemi stakesandIam pr obabl yt hemostst upidguyt oeverl i
ve
foreverl ooki ngatanot herwomanandt hinki ngshewoul dmakeabet terwi fet hanmywi fe,for
thinki ngt hatIcoul dl ovehermor et hanmywi f
e.Iwasst upi df orwant ingheri nmyl i
fe, jeezmy
mi ndwasmadeup.IknewwhoIwant edt ospendt her estofmyl i
fewi t h.
Her :Ican' thandl et hef actt hatyoucal lmeanag, howyougetangr ywi thmewhenIexpr ess
myhur tandi nsecur it
ieswhi l
eyoumademei nsecur e!Ihat et hatyoudi dn' tgetangr ywi thher
evenwhenshet riedt osl apyou, youhuggedher .Butyout reatmel ikeIhavesomecont agious
disease, youcan' twai ttogetoutofmysi ght .Ihat eyourl ousyapol ogi es.
Agai nInodded.Iwasspeechl ess, Inevert houghtorsawi tthatway.Thatshehasacont agi ous
disease, Ineverwal koutonher .OrdoI ?DoIr eallytreatherl iket hat ?Yes!YesandYes!
Her :Ican' thandl ehowyout hinkandsayyouhavehur thersomuchbutyoucan' tseehow
muchyouhur tmeever yday.Yout houghtofmar r
yingherwhi l
eyoumar riedt omeYandi sa!You
hur tme!Youbet rayedme.I twaswor set hanwhenyousl eptwi thher .Whatcoul dn' tIof feryou
Yandi sa?
Me:BabeIam notevent hinki ngaboutt hatanymor e, itwasj ustat hought .Aonet imet hought .
Phumzapl ease, pl easest handwasam pl easef orgiveme.Iam t heweakestandst upi destman
thateverl ived, Iwi llwor konmyweaknesses.Il etthem getawaywi thmebutbabepl ease
forgi veme.Pl easest handwasam, pleasePhumi .
Her :NoYandi sadon' tapol ogi seanymor e.
Me:Becauseyoudon' tbel i
evei t?( shenodded)Youdon' tevenwantt obel i
evei tright ?Have
youl ostal lhopei nus?
Her :Youkeepaski ngmet obepat i
entwi thyouwhi leyouent ertainyourt hought sabouther .I
can' tYandi sa, i
tst oomuchf orme.Youl oveherbet t
ert hanme, you'llneverbef ullyhappywi t
h
me.
Me:Thati snott ruePhumza, Iloveyoubet ter.PhumzaIf ellinl ovewi thyouwhi chi ssomet hing
Icoul dneverdowi thher .Okayl etsf or getabouther ,pl easef orgetabouther ,Ihavebabe.Ihave,
Iam overt hatshi t.Iam overt hatconf usedandwant ingmor ephase, Iwantyouandyouonl y.
Sheshookherhead.
Her :Not omor rowi twi l
lbeadi ff
er entst ory, withyouIcanneverknow.
Me:Il etyoudownIknow, Ihur tyouIknow.Imadeyouf eell essl oved, Iknow. ..IknowIhaven' t
beent hebesthusband/ par tnerbutpl easedon' tgiveuponus.Babedon' tgi vei ntot his, don' t
enduspl ease.
Sheshookherheadandwi pedhert ears.
Me:Sowhatnow?Si nceyouar enotwi llingt of orgivemeorputt hi
sbehi ndus, wher et onow?
Sheshr uggedhershoul der s, Inodded.
Me:Forwhati tswor thImeantmyapol ogyt hismor ningandImeanti twhenIsai di tsonl yyou,
meandt heki ds, nobodyel se.Andi tsgoi ngt ost ayl iket hat ,Idon' twantt obr ingat hirdper son
i
nourr elationshi p.Iwantt ogot obedwi thyouever yni ght,makel ovet oyouandyouonl y,love
onlyyou, Iwantt owakeupnextt oyouever ymor ning.Iwantt ogr owol dwi t
hyou, shar e
beaut i
fulanddeepmemor i
eswi thyou, shar edr eamswi t
hyou.Fornowi tmi ghtseem l ikewe
don' thaveanyt hingi ncommon, wedon' tshar eanydr eamst oget herandt hati spr obabl y
becausewedon' tknoweachot hert hatwel lenough.Wehaven' tr eallyspokenaboutal lofthat
andt hat 'snotyourf aul t
, Iblamemysel f.Iam al waysbusywi thwor kandt ravel l
ing, Ipaidlittl
e
attent iont oourr elat ionshi plat elyandt hat '
swhyi thassuf fer edsomuch, whyIhavebeena
totalst r anger .
Ithoughtyest er daywebur iedChant ellewi thourconver sat i
on.Thi smor ningIwokeupf eeli
ng
sost rongl yaboutus, Ihadnoi deawhatwasi nst oref orme.Absol utel
ynoi dea, Iwant edheri n
myl i
feandonl yherbutshi thappens.Ihonest lyt houghtwewer emaki ngsomepr ogr ess,I
didn'tr eal izet hatsomuchwasbr okenher e.
Her :Ineedt i
met ot hink, Ineedspace.Ineedt ogohomef oraf ewdaysorweeks.
Me:Wedon' tneedspace, weneedt owor konus.Bui ldusagai nPhumzapl ease.I titsthisplace
thatyoudon' tlike, okayf i
newecangohomet oyourf ather '
shouse.Foraf ewdaysorweeks.I
havet of i
ndmymot hert oo.
Her :Andyourj ob?
Me:I '
llaskf orl eave, 2weeksmaxi mum.Wear enotbusyonanyt hingatt hemoment .
Shenodded.
Me:Comeher e.( Ihel doutmyhandsf orher ,shet ookt hem andIpul l
edhert ome.Iwr apped
myar msar oundhert henki ssedherf orehead)Thankyou.
Her :Okay.
Me:Wear egoi ngt obeokay, wear egoi ngt ogett hr ought his.
Shenodded.
Me:Iam sor ry.
Agai nshenoddedandbr okeawayf rom myembr ace.
Her :Ineedt oat tendt ot heki ds.
Me:OkayI 'l
liront heseagai nsot hatIcangoseemyboss.
Shenoddedandwal kedoutoft hel aundr yr oom, fuckme!Howcoul dIbesost upi d?Howcoul d
Idot hist ot hi sgi rl?Whydi dIevenhavet oent er tainal ltheset hought saboutmyex?
.
Igott owor kt of indMandl ather eal ready, hespendt heni ghtatmyhouseaswel l.
Him:Myout ti
e!
Me:Shar p.
Him:What '
supout ti
e?Wi feexhaust edyout hi smor ning?
Me:Fuckyou.
Iwentupt oSmi th' sof fi
ce.Iknockedandwal kedi nwhenshecal l
edmei n.
Me:MrSmi th
Him:MrDl ami ni, whyar eyousof ormal ?
Me:Uhhsi rIwant edt oaskf oraf ewdaysof f,mymar riagei sgoi ngt hroughar oughpat chandI
am af raidImi ghtl osemywi fe.Idon' twantt ol oseher .
Henodded.
Him:Iunder standcompl et elybutYandi sayoucan' ttakedaysof fwheneveryouf eell i
keit.We
runacompanynotaspazashop, yourser vicesar eneeded.
Me:Igett hatsi rbutwear enotbusyonanypr oj ectatt hemomentandwebot hknowt hatmy
servicesandski llsar eonl yr eallyneededt hen.Icanst i
lldot heseconsul tationsovert hephone,
i
fIam neededIwi llbeacal laway.Ij ustr eal l
yneedt his,mymar riageneedsi t.
Him:Ican' tjustgi veyoul eave, howmanydaysar ewet alkingabouther e?
Me:2weeksbutl ikeIsai dIwi llbeaphonecal laway.
Him:2weeks?Wher ehaveyoueverhear dofsuchl eave?Youcan' ttake2weeksof f.
Me:ThenIqui t, itsi mpor tantf ormet odot his.Mymar ri
agedependsoni t.
Him:Okayokay2weekst henyoucangetbackt owor k.
Me:Onemor et hingSmi th,Iwoul dl ikeMi ssAdamst ober elievedof fherdut ies.Idon' tneed
help, Ihavebeendoi ngt his.Managi ngever yt hingbymysel f,Idopr ivatepr ojectswi thoutany
help.Icompl etet hosepr ojectswi thoutanassi st ant .
Him:What ?
Me:Wor ki ngwi thherhasputal otofst raini nmymar ri
age, Idon' tthinkIcandoi tanymor e.I
am sor rybuti t
sei therIwal korshedoes, Idon' tneedhel p.Icanmanageal lbymysel f.
Him:Ican' tdot hatjustbecausei t
sput ti
ngst rainonyourmar riage, i
tsaper sonalpr obl em.I t
hasnot hi ngt odowi thwor k, ifshewasn' tpr ef ormi ngwel l.
Shewasn' tper formi ngwel lbutIwasn' tgoi ngt osayt hat, thisposi tionwasnotf orsomeone
whost illwant st olear n.Itwasf orsomeonewhocoul dfillmyboot sandshecoul dn't.Smi t
hj ust
hadt ochoose.
Me:ThenIr esi gnwi thimmedi ateef fect ,nonot iceser ving, nonot hi ng.Iam done, Idon' twant
towor kwi thher .Mymar riagei sf alli
ngapar tr ighti nf rontofmyeyesget t
ingr idofMi ssAdams
willhelpsol vesomeofmypr obl ems.Shecameasaf avouranyway, pleaseputi nawor df or
herwi thyourf riend.Hei sr unni ngani nter nshi ppr ogr am, shecanl ear nt here, startther e.Weal l
startedt her e.
Him:Idon' tli
ket hef actt hatyouar et hreat eni ngmebutokayIwi llputi nawor df orherwi t
hmy
fri
end, Iwi llreleaseheri mmedi atel yift hatwi llhel p.Ican' tloseagoodmanovert his.
Me:Thankyou.
Hepi ckedupt hephoneandcal ledheri nt ohi sof fice.Shewal kedi naf teraf ewmi nut es.
Her :Sir.
Him:Pl easet akeaseat .
Shesatdown.
Her :Yandi sa.
Me:Chant elle.
Shenodded.
Him:UhYandi saher ehasaskedmet or elieveyouof fyourdut i
es, hedoesn' tneedanyhel p.It
waswr ongofust ol ookf oranassi stantmanagerwi thouthi m knowi ng, hewassupposedt o
giveusagoaheadandhi resomeoneofhi schoi ce.Wedi dn' tfoll
owpr ocedur eandt hathas
l
andedusi nser iousanddanger ousconsequences.
Shel ookedatme.
Her :Whatar et hoseconsequencessi r?
Him:Youdon' thavet oknowaboutt hem, justknowt hatt her ewer eser iousconsequencesof
ouract ions.ButIwi llputi nawor df oryouwi thmycol l
eaguesi nt hei ndust ry.Thi sposi tionwas
toobi gf oryout of i
llanyway, youdi dn' tmeett her equi r
ement scriter i
a.Iwasj ustdoi ngaf ri
end
af avouri nt heexpenseofanot herf riend.Iwi llsuggestt hatyouf i
ndani nternshi ppr ogr am, I
knowonet hati saboutt ost arti naf ewmont hsandIwi l
lputi nawor df oryou.I twi l
lbeagr eat
platformf oryout olear nwi thoutal otofexpect at i
onsf rom you.
Her :Yessi r.
Him:I tsapayi ngi nter nshi p, maybeyoumi ghtevengetaper manentposi t
iont her e.
Her :Yessi rsowhen. ..
Him:I mmedi at ely,tomor rowi syourl astday.Iam sor ryMi ssAdams.
Her :It
sokay, thankyouf orgi vi ngmeapl atfor mt ol earn.Yout ooYandi sa.
Him:ThankyouMi ssAdamsyoumayl eaveusnow.
Shenoddedandgotupandl eftt heof fice.
Me:Thankyousi r
.
Him:Wewoul dhat et ol oseagr eatpr ojectmanager ,youhavedonewonder sf ort hiscompany.
Yourser vicesar ehighl yneeded.
Me:Thankyousi r
.
Him:Whenar eyout akingl eave?
Me:Tomor row, ifIam neededbacki nt heof ficeIwi l
lcomebacki mmedi ately.
Him:Okayj ustknowt hatyourwor kwi llpileup.
Me:Ial waysgetmywor kdoneMrSmi th, youknowmeIdel iver.
Him:Iknowt hatbutl ett hisbet hel astt i
meyouar easki ngf orsuchaf avour ,youcan' tjustt ake
l
eave.Youappl yf ort hist ypeofl eaveaweekbef or enotadaybef or e.Andyest erdayyou
wor kedahal fday.
Ismi led.
Him:Don' tt akeadvant ageofourr elationshi p.Wear ef ri
endsout si det hewal l
soft hispl ace.
Inodded.
Me:Neveragai nsi r,Iapol ogi se.
Him:Okayyoucangot owor know.
Inodded.
Me:Thankyouagai n.
HenoddedsoIgotupandl ef thi sof fice.Iwentt omyof ficeandsatdownbehi ndmydesk.
Chantellel ookedatmef orawhi le.
Her:It'
syourwi feisn' tit?
Me:Shutup.I 'llbegoi ngawayf oraf ewdayssoIwoul dliket oseeQhawebef oreIl eave, I'
llget
him aphonet hatIcancont acthi m on.Thesamephonet hathewi lluset ocont actme.
Her:Youar esuchabi tch.
Me:Thankyou.
Her:Ican' tbel ievet hi s,youar ef i
ght ingyourper sonal bat tl
est hroughwor k.
Me:Nononoyoust ar t
edt hi sshi twi t
ht hatbi tchMandl a, youwant edt obear oundmesot hat
youcanconf usedandt rytogetbet weenmeandmywi fe.
Her:That '
snott rue.
Me:Ifitwasn' tt henwhywer eyoual waysr emi ndi ngmeofourpast ?Youwant edmet odoubt
whatIhavewi thmywi fe,Ishoul dhaveseeni tf r
om t hegetgobutIwassobl indedbyal lthis
guil
tinmymi nd.Butnotanymor eChant elle, Ilovemywi fe.Iam i nlovewi t
hmywi fe, Idon't
carehowwemar r
ied.Poi nti swear emar riedandIl oveher ,Iwontl etyougetbet weenus.But t
outofmyl ifeandst opt hinki ngt hatt her ei sanyt inychancef oryouandI .StayawayChant elle,
staythef uckout .
Her:What ever !
Me:Yeahsayt hatandf uckof f!
Her:Youknowyou' llcomeback, youal waysdo.Youcangetmef iredbutyouknowwher eIl ive
soyouwi llf i
ndme.Whenyour eal i
set hatt hatbi tch!Thatvi l
lagewhor e!
Igotupf rom mychai r.
Me:Whatdi dyouj ustcal lher ?
Her:Avi l
lagewhor e!Shewi llneverbeenoughf oryou!
Me:Cal lhert hatagai nandIwi l
lbl acksl am you!
Her:AndIwi l
lgetyouar rest edandt hatwhor ewi llnever ,
shewi llneverseeyourassagai n.
You'l
lturni ntoapr isonbi tchsoyoubet terwat chwhatyousayordot opi ssmeof f!Yout hinkI
am stupidwenaYandi sa!Il ovedyou, Igaveyoumyal lbutyoust i
llmar ri
edt hat. .
.
Me:Cal lherawhor eagai n!Cal lherawhor eagai n!I twi lltakemor et hanj ailtocomebet ween
ussoyoubet t ert hinkagai n.Iwi llneverf allf oryourt hreat s.
Her:Don' tmi st akemyl ovef oryouf ormyweakness, shewi llnever !Shewi l
lneverbehappy
whileIstillcr ybecauseofyou!Shewi llfeel thepai nt hatIf elt.
"Whatt hef uckman? !Ever yonecanheart het woofyou! "
Her:Sowhat ?!Lett hem heart hatt hisbi t
cht hatt hinkshei saman. ..
Irai
sedmyhandbutMandl apushedi t.
Him:Don' tf al lint ohert rapman, don' t.Chi llout ,chi l
l.(het ur nedt oChant el l
e)Youar easnake,
youmademebe. .
.
Her:Becauseyouar est upi d!Mandl at ot her escuewohohf uckt hat !Thatbi tchwi llneverhave
you!Iwasr aisedbyJer omenotbodyget sawaywi t
hhur tingme.
Him:Youmani pulat edus!Youmani pulat edme, Ithought. ..
Her:What ?!Yout houghtwhat ? !Thatyoucoul dpl ayme, t
oywi thmyf eelingsandgetawaywi th
i
t?Never !
Whatt hef uck?Thi swasn' tChant ell
e, itcoul dn' tbe.
Her:Youki lledamanYandi sa, myf atherwentdownf ort hatbecausehet houghtyoul ovedme.
Butyouwer epl ayingmeal lalongandyou, youwi llgodownf orit.
Him:Youar enotser i
ous, youar enotser iousChant elle.Youcan' tuset hatagai nsthi m.
Her:IfIcan' thaveyou, shewonthaveyouei ther .
Me:Youcan' tf orcemet oloveyou, youcantf orcemet obewi thyou.Goongor epor tme, Idon' t
care.Doshi t,Idon' tcar ebuti twi l
ltakemor et hanpr isont obr eakmeandPhumzaup.
Her:Wewi llseeaboutt hat.Youki l
ledmyf ather ,yesIhear dyourl i
ttlechatonmyf i
rstdayher e.
Thebot hofyou, youwontgetawaywi thhur tingme.
Shegotupandwal kedout .
Him:Justl ett hatbi tchgoYandi sa, shei sn'twor thi tdawg.Iam sor ryIhadnoi deat hatshe
wasupt osomet hing, Ihadnoi deawhatshewaspl anning.
Me:Yout houghtyouhadherf ool edbutshehadt hebot hofusf ooled.Damni t
!Ihavet ogo
home.
Him:Chi lloutshewontdoj erktoyourwi fe,shedoesn' tknowwher eyoul ive.
Me:Ar eyousur eoft hat ?
Him:Iam posi tive, Inevert oldher .
Me:ButI 'l
lcal lPhumzaandmakesur e.
Him:Ican' tbel ieveshehadusf ool ed.
Me:Rememberwhatshesai dbef oreIgotmar ried?Iwi l
lneverbehappywi thher.
Him:Youwi llneverf indyourpeace.It houghtshesai dalloft hatbecauseshewasangr y.
Me:Met oo, shedi sappear edaf tert hat .
Him:Andshecamebackont hedayofyourweddi ng.
Me:Andt henJer omewasr eleased, whati ftheywer ewor kingt oget herallalong?Whenshe
clai
medt oknownot hingshewasl ying.
Him:Howcoul dwet rustsomeonewhohi deyoursonawayf rom youf or4year s?!
Me:Shepl ayedus.Shepl ayedme!
Him:Wef ellf ori tandnowwecoul dgot oj ail.
Me:AndIam aboutt ol osemywi feovershi t.Howcoul dIbesost upid?!God!
Him:Tal kt oher ,expl ain, makeherunder standt hatyouwer emani pulated.Youdi dn'tknowher
plans, yout houghtshewasgenui ne.I t
sonl ynowt hatshei sshowi nghert ruecol ours.Tellher
aboutJer omeandhert hr eats,tellherever ything.
Me:Thi sissomessedup, wemessedup.
Him:Phumzal ovesyou, shewi l
lf orgiveyou.
Me:Iwi shi twast hateasy, shei sf edupwi t
hmyshi t.
Him:Shemar riedyouengakwazidudeandputi nef forttomaket hiswor k.Whenyouwer ein
hospi t
alshepr ayedandst uckbyyoursi de, shecar ried8ki dsinherf oryou.Thatwomanl oves
you, shewontgi veuponyounow.Shei sjusthur tatt hemomentbutshel ovesyou.
Inoddedandt ookoutmyphoneandcal ledPhumza.Af tertalki
ngt oherIl ookedatMandl a,he
wasst ressing.
Him:Shehasnopr oofr ight ?Youneversai danyt hingabouti ttoher .
Me:No!Youbr oughtheri ntoourl ivesagai n!
Him:Don' tf uckenpoi ntatme!
Me:Whyar eweevenf ight ing?
Him:Yeahwej usthavet ost ickt oonest ory,Iwasathome.Youwer emeet i
ngwi t
hher ,before
thatyouwer eathome.Getyourwi feandsi sterst oconf irmt hat.I'l
lgetmypar entst overi
fyt hat
story.Goodt hingwedi dn' tusemygun.
Me:Thatwasgoodt hi nking, whati fJer omei snotdead?
Him:Don' tf uckenpl aywi thmel iket hatyousawhi mr i
ght?
Me:YeahIam j ustmaki ngsur e.
Him:Shehasnot hi ngagai nstus.
Inodded.MydoorswungopenandSmi t
hwal kedin, hel ookedupset .
Smi th:Thebot hofyouneedt ol eavet hispl acebecauseyouar ef ir
ed, Icantwor kwi t
hsuch
animal s.
Me:Why?Whatdi dwedo?
Smi th:Thi s!
Hepoi ntedbehi ndhi m, Chant ellewasbr uisedandhershi rtwasabi ttorn.Youhavegott obe
kiddingme!
Mandl a:Wedi dn'tdot hat !Whywoul dwedot hat ?!
!
Smi th:Becausesher ef usedt okeepyourdi rtysecr et!Howcoul dyou?Ial readycal ledthepol ice
and. ..
.
Me:Whatt hehel l?Wedi dn' tdot hat!Shel eftt hisof fi
cei ngoodshape.
Smi th:Soi t
snott ruet hatyouhi therbacki nSwazi land?Thatyouabusedher ?Tookt urnswi th
her!Howcoul dyoudot hatt oyourf riend?
Mandl a:Abusedher ?!
Smi th:Shehasar epor tf rom adoct ort hatpr ovest hatshewasabused.
Us:Ar epor t?Byus? !Chant ell
epl easet ellust hatthat '
snott r
ue.
Shehi dbehi ndMrSmi th.Fuckt hisshi t
!!Wehear dourr ecept i
onisttalki
ngt otwomenandwe
j
ustf i
gur edt hati t
st hepol ice.
MrSmi th:Thankyouf orget tingbackt ousi mmedi atel y,thesear ethet womanandt hisisthe
woman.
Offi
cer:Gent lemenyouwi llhavet ocomet ot hepol icest ationwi t
hus.Yout ooma' am, wehave
totakeyourst atement .
Theot heronet ookouthandcuf fs.
Us:Younotcuf fingus!Youdon' thaveawar rentf orourar restsoyoucan' tcuf fus.
Mandl a:Andwear ewi ll
ingt ocooper ate.
Offi
cer:Lett hem go, f
ol lowust ot hepol icest ation.
Me:Af teryou.
Offi
cer:Ma' am.
Het ookof fhi sj acketandputi tonhershoul derst henhel pedherouroft her oom asifshe
couldn'twal k.Thatbi tch!Wef oll
owedaf t erthem wi thever yonel ookingatusandwonder ing
whathappened.Wedeci dedt ot akemycaranddr ovebehi ndt hepolicevan
.
Inthecar .
..
Mandl a:Thatbi tch!
Me:Shei sevi l!
Him:Wedi dn' tevent ouchher ,howdi dshegetsobr uised?
Me:Shebeather selfup, that '
st heonl yexpl anat i
on.
Him:Whodoest hat?
Me:Adesper atebi tchl ikeher .
Hechuckl ed.
Him:Ican' tbel i
evet hisbul lshi t!
Me:Whatr epor twasSmi t
ht alkingabout ?
Him:Idon' tknow.Butmydi ckhasnevert ouchedherdi rtypussysoi fthat'
swhatshemeansby
abuse, tookt ur nswi thher .
Me:Butt heydon' tknowt hat .
Him:Ican' tbel i
evet hatshei susi ngwhathappenedt oheragai nstus.
Me:Meei t
herman, itsl i
kemyl i
fej usttookat urnf ort hewor st.
Him:Tel lmeabouti t
.
.
Whenwegott ot hest at ionwepar kedt hengotof fandf oll
owedaf terthem,wewer etoldt owai
t
i
nt herecept ionwhi let heyt ookChant ell
e'sst atement .Thel i
est hatwer ecomi ngoutoft hat
woman' smout hJesus!Andshehad" evidence" ,thatwasevi dencef rom lee-Johannesbur g.
Thef i
let hatt hedoct orgaveuswhenhewasdi schar gi ngher .
Mandl a:Wear enotget t
ingoutoft hisplace.
Me:Wedi dn'tdoanyoft het hingsshei ssayi ng.
Him:Butt heydon' tknowt hatandi thi?Shei ssooconvi nci ng.
Apol i
cewomanwal kedovert ousaf tertaki ngChant el le'
sst atement .
Her:Yandi saandMandl awear echar gi
ngyouf ort her apeandassaul tofMissChant elle
Adams.Youhavear ightt o. ..
Shel i
stedourr ightsandt ookust oacel lwi thf ourmen.
Me:Wedi dn'tdot his, yesi thappenedt oherbuti twasn' tus.
Her:Theevi denceshehasagai nstyoupr ovesot herwi se.
Mandl a:CanIgetmyphonecal l
,wewantt ocallourl awyer s.
Her:Of cos.
Shehandedourphonesbackt ous.Ical ledPhumzai mmedi ately.
.
.
Phumza:
IputSi bulelebackonhi scott hent ookt hecal l.
Me:Yandi sa
Him:Phumi pleasel i
st ent ome, callmom andt ellhert hatMandl aandIhavebeenar rested.
Sheneedst ogetusoutofher eplease.
Me:What ?Why?
Him:Don'tstr
essabouti tI'
l
lexplai
nlat
er.Pl
easej usttel
lhertogetmeoutofherepl
ease.
Me:Yandisa.
Him:PleasedoasIsayPhumzaanddon' tcryplease.
Inodded.
Him:Iloveyou.
Me:Iloveyou.
"yourti
meisup, handthephonebackt ome" ,afemalevoicesaidinthebackgr
ound.
Him:Ihavetogobabe.
Hehungup, Iwipedmyf acethencall
edhismot her.Shetookthecallal
mostimmedi
atel
y.
Her:Hell
o
Me:Mamai t
sYandi sa!Yandisa.
.
Her:Whathappenedt oYandi sa?
Me:Hewasar r
ested.
Her:When?Why?
Me:Idon'tknowmama, heneedsyourhelpplease.
Her:OkayIwillcal
lhisfather'
slawyer,
hewillgethim outtoday.
Me:Thankyou.
Idroppedthecallthenwentdownonmykneesandspoket omyGod.

66
Yandi sa:
"Whatar eyouguysi nfor?",abol dheadedguyasked.Hehadt attooseverywhere,faceeven.
Mandl a:Whatar eyoui nfor?
Boldheaded:Mur der .
Me:Goodf oryounowf uckof f.
Hegotupandwal kedt owar dsus, Mandl apokedmewi t
hhi sel bow.
Mandl a:Whatt hehel liswr ongwi thyou?
Me:I '
m notscar edofhi m.
Boldhead:Whatdi dyouj ustsay?
Me:Fuckof f!
Hegr abbedmebyt hecollarofmyshi rtandpul l
edmeup, hitmeagai nstt
hewal l
.Hehitmy
foreheadwi thhi shead, f
uck!Ipushedhi m backandpunchedhi m onhisface,hepunchedme
back.Ipunchedhi m agai n,oneaf t eranother ,hepushedmebackandpunchedmyr i
bsmulti
ple
ti
mescausi ngmet ocol l
apseont hef l
oor.Mandl apushedhi m back.
Mandl a:Whatt hehel l?Yougoodboy?
InoddedbutIwasi npain,Ij ustwasn' tgoingt ogivethetat tooedbol dmant hesatisf
act
ion.He
pushedMandl aandpul ledmeup, Ihithi m withmyhead.Andhest umbled.
"Yandi saandMandl ayourl awyeri sher e"
Me:I twasaboutf uckent ime.
Sheopenedf orusandwewal kedout .
Boldheaded:Youwi l
lcomebackpr et
tyboy!
Me:Fuckyou!
Ihear dhiml aughaswewal kedawayt ot hei nterr
ogat i
onr oom.
.
"Whathappenedt oyou? ",mom askedaswewal kedi nt
ot hei nterrogati
onroom.
Mandl a:Hegoti naf i
ght.
MrSi ngh:Youal readyst artingf i
ght syetyouar est i
lli
nahol dingcel lwhathappenswhenyou
got ot heact ualpr ison?
Me:ButIwontgoi ntherer i
ght ?
Mom:You' llmakesur ethathedoesn' tgoi nt herer i
ght?
MrSi ngh:I'lldoal lthatIcant ogetyouout , Ihavepushedf orbailbut .
..
Me:Ican' tgobacki nthere.
Mandl a:Hewi llgetuski ll
edi fwegobacki nt herepleasegetusout ,wecan'tspendthenighti
n
there.
MrSi ngh:Itsj ustahol dingcel l.
Mom:I t
snotj ustahol dingcel l l
ookathi m!Ar eyouokaybaby?
Shet ouchedmyf acet henwher emyhandwas, thatidi otgotmei nthesamepl aceJer ome' s
guysgotme.I fmyr ibswer en' tbr okenagai nt henGodi sr eallyal i
ve.
Me:Ahhmamapl easeIam notababy.
Mom:WhyYandi sa?Whydoyouwantt oki llme?
"Wher eisMandl a? !",Mandl a'smot herwal kingi nshout i
ng.Shewasf umingwi t
hanger ,these
women!
Mandl a:Idi dn' tdoanyt hingmot her ,wewer ef alselyaccused.
Hesai daf t
erbr eaki ngt hehugwi thhi smot her .
MrSi ngh:Whataboutal lthatevi dencet heyhaveagai nstyou?
Me:Whywoul dwer apeher ?
Mandl a:Orbeatheri nt oapul p?Comeonwewoul dn'tdot hatt oanywoman!
Me:Especi allyt hemot herofmychi ld.
MrSi ngh:Ladi espl easeexcuseusIwoul dliket ot alkyomycl ients.
Them:Gett hem outpl ease.
Mom:Heneedsmedi cal attent i
on, hecan' tspendt heni ghtinher e.
Me:Iam f i
nemama.
Mom:Youar enotf i
neYandi sa!Youar ei npai ncan' tyouseet hat ?
MrSi ngh:Ladi espl ease.
Theynoddedandwal kedout .
MrSi ngh:Iwi llneedyout ot ellmeever ything, noonecanhearus.
Mandl a:Areyousur e?
MrS:Posi ti
ve.
Mandl a:Wedi dn' tr apeher ,wedi dn'ttouchher .Chant el l
eandIwer efr
iendsorsoIt hought .
Me:Thet hingi swet ookcar eofhi sf atheruyabo?Andsheknowsshehasnoevi denceagai nst
usfort hatexpectwhatshehear dust alki ngabout .
Mandl a:Soshet houghtshecoul dusedwhathappenedt oherweeksagoagai nstus, pinitall
onus.Wedi dn' ttouchher ..
.
Wet oldhi mt hewhol est oryst ar ti
ngf rom t hedayshef irstwal kedi ntomyof f
ice, t
hel odge
i
ncident ,openi ngt hemi ssingper son' sr epor t,thecal lf rom Johannesbur g,fi
ndinghett hereand
thefil
eshehas.Ever ything.
Henodded.
MrS:Youki lledJer ome?
Me:Heki ll
edmyf at herandhewast hreat eningmywi fej ustlikehi sdaughterisr i
ghtnow.
Henodded.
MrS:Hmm t her ei snoevi denceagai nstyou?
Weshookourheads.
MrS:Ar eyousur ebecausei ft her ei sanyIwi llneedyout odest royit
.
Mandl a:Itwaswel lt akencar eof f .
MrS:Good.I '
llmakesur et hatyoudon' tspendt heni ghther e,thesepeopl edon' thaveacase
againstyou.
Mandl a:Please, wewoul dbegr atef ul.
MrS:Iwi llaskt hem t okeepyoui nher e, therei snowayIwi llletyougetanywher eneart hatcell
againandIwi llgetyouadoct ort ocheckyouout .
Me:Iam f i
ne, itsnotasbadasi tlooks.
MrS:Yeahr i
ghtyouar ejustl ikeyourf at her, I
'
llgetbackt oyouguys.
Wenoddedandhewal kedout .
Mandl a:Didyouhavet of i
ghtt hatguy? !
Me:Het houghtwewer ebi t
chesIhadt opr ovehi m wr ong.
Mandl a:You' l
lgetuski l
led.Whati fwespendani ghtinher e?
Me:Youwi llsleepwi thoneeyeopeni nt hatcase, f
uckt histhinghur t
s.
Mandl a:Letmesee.
Me:Ar eyouadoct or ?
Mandl a:Justl etmesee!
Heliftedmyshi rtup.
Mandl a:Fuck!I tsbadbr o.
Me:Don' tplaywi thmel iket hat.
Mandl a:Noj okesbr a, itsr eal lyswol len.
Ifeltitwi thmyhand, hegotme.
.
.
Phumza:
Idon' tknowhowmanyt imesIhavebeenchecki ngmyphone, ther ewasnot hingf rom Yandi sa
orhi smot her .Whatwashear restedf or?Iwant edt oknowandIwant edt oknowi fhewas
comi nghome.Hecoul dn' tdot histous, hecoul dn'tgot ojai l
.Hej ustcoul dn't,Ineededhi m.Hi s
kidsneededhi m.Acal l camet hroughmyphoneandIt ooki ti
mmedi ately.
Me:Yandi sa? !
Cal l
er :Nosor ryma' am butIam cal l
ingr egar dingYandi sa.
Itwasamal evoi ce.
Me:Okay?
Him:Thi si sMrSmi th,hi sboss.
Me:Okay.
Him:Iam sur eyouhavehear dt hatYandi sa, yourhusbandwasar r
estedt hismor ning.Iwi ll
needyout ocomebackuphi sst ufffrom t heof fice,Iam r eleasi nghi m offhisdut i
es.Hi m and
hisf riend, Mandl a.Ial readycal l
edhi spar ents.
Me:Whatdi dhedo?
Him:I tsnotmypl acet ot ellyou, whenyougett i
mej ustdropbyt heof fi
cet opi ckuphi sst uf f.
Me:OkayIhavet ogo, somebodyi satt hegat e.
Idr oppedt hecal landcheckedout si
det hinkingi twasYandi sabuthehashi sownkey.I twas
Zet huandBuchul esoIbuzzedt hem i n.
>>>
Zet hu:Ar eyouokay?Howar eyouhol di
ngup?Haveyouhear danyt hing?
Buchul e:Zet hu
Webr oket hehugandIwi pedmyt ear s.
Zet hu:What 'sgoi ngon?Whywashear rested?
Me:Idon' tknow, Ihavebeencal l
ingyourmot herandshei sn'tpi ckingup.Idi dn'tknowwho
elset ocal l,Iam sor ry.
Zet hu:I tsokaywewer en' tbusyanyway.
Me:Haven' tyouhear danyt hing?
Sheshookherhead, ther ei snot hingt hatbeat st hepai nofbei ngi nt hedar k.Notknowi ng
what '
sgoi ngon.
Zet hu:Mom wontt akemycal l
sei therandGodIdon' twantt ocal lOl wethushewi llgocr azy.
Me:Iknow.
Zet hu:Whyi sthishappeni ngnow?Iam get t
ingmar r
iednextmont h.HowcanIgetmar ried
withoutmybr other ?
Buchul e:Iam sur ehewi llbeoutbyt hen.Icangetmyl awyert ohel p.
Zet hu:Wedon' tevenknowwhathei shel df or!
Buchul e:Zet huyourbr otheri snotabadguyIam sur eitwassomesor tofmi sunder standi ng.
Ami sunder standing?I fheknewt heYandi sat hatIknowhewoul dn'tbet hatr elaxedandt alking
aboutmi sunder standi ngs, thathewi llcomeback.Whati fhewasar restedf orJer ome' smur der?
Wor se!Bot ht hemur der shecommi t
t ed?I '
llneverseehi m agai n,I'l
lneverf eelhi sgent letouch,
hissof tl i
psagai nstmi ne, hi sbodyagai nstmi ne.Ourchi l
dr enwer egoingt ogr owupwi thouta
father , ohmyGod.Pl easeLor d!Yandi saisn'tabadper son, hehasj ustmadebadchoi cesi nt he
nameofget tingjust icef orhi slovedones.Youcan' tpunishhi mf ort hat.Iwi pedmyt earsand
gotup.
Buchul e:Hei sgoi ngt ogetoutsi sitrynott owor ryaboutt hat.
Inoddedandwal kedout ,wi shi ngt hatIwoul dseehi m dri
vei nanymi nutef r
om nowbut
mi nut eswentbyandt her ewasst il
lnosi gnofYandi sa.
.
Itwasget ti
ngl ateandi twasget ti
ngdar kout side.Ther ewer est i
llnonewsf r om orabout
Yandi sa, hismot herwasn' tpi ckingupherphone.Buchul edi dn'twantust ogot othepol ice
station, hekeptonsayi ngwewoul dn'tbeal l
owedt oseet hem.Ol wethuwasi nourl ounge
cryingandcur si ng, Idon' tknowatwhoexact ly.Zet huwascr yinginherman' sarms.AndIwas
standi ngbyt hedoorwi t
hmyphonei nmyhand, wai ti
ngf ormymant ocomehome.
Me:Ican' tdot hi sanymor e, Ican'tsi therewi thoutanyanswer s.Iwantt oknowwhat 'sgoingon.
Olwet hu:Met oo, whycan' twegot her e?
Buchul e:Anddowhat ?
Me:Demandt oseet hem.Iwantt oknowwhat 'sgoi ngon.
Zethu:Babepl easewehavet ogot her e.
Buchul e:Ther ear eki dsi nt hehouse, whowi lll ookaf tert hem?
Olwet hu:Wewi lltaket hem wi thus, theyhavet heirowncar .
Me:Yes.
Myphoner angi nmyhand, itwasYandi sa'smot her.ThankGod!Iaccept edt hecal l
.
Me:Mama?
Zethu:Loudspeaker .
Iputi tonl oudt henputi tont opoft hecof feet abl e.
Olwet hu:Mamawhat 'sgoi ngon?I sbhut icomi nghome?Howi sMandl a?Di dyouseet hem?
Whywer etheyar rest ed?
Mama:Iam sur eyouar eal lwor ri
edbutyouhavenot hingt owor ryabout .
Zethu:Whatdoyoumeanwehavenot hi
ngt owor ryabout ?
Mama:Imeant hatyourf at her '
slawyerhaspr ovent hei rinnocence, theywer ereleased2hour s
ago.
Olwet hu:Thenwhyar en'tt heyhomeyet ?
Mama:Wehadt or ushYandi satot hehospi t
al ,hewasi nt heaterbuthei soutnowandget ti
ng
rest.
Me:Why?Whathappened?
Mama:Hegoti naf ighti nt hehol dingcel l
,hi
sr ibswer edi sconnect edsohi sdoct orhadt o
attacht hem agai n.
Me:Buthei sgoi ngt obef iner i
ght?
Mama:Of cosbabyhei sgoi ngt obef i
ne, i
twasnot hingser i
ous.Af terthatf irstincidenthisr ibs
aref ragi l
e/sensi tive.
Olwet hu:Wher ei sMandl a?I sheokay?
Mama:Whyar eyousowor ri
edaboutMandl a?Hei sr ighther e.Hehasbeenar eallygoodf r
iend
toyourbr other.
Shesmi ledandwer olledoureyesather .
Mama:Ihavet ogokebaby, Iwi l
lexpl ainf ur
therwhenIgethome.
Me:CanIcomet ot hehospi tal?Iwoul dreall
yl ovet oseehi m.
Mama:Of cosbabyI '
llseei fIcangett hedoct ort oal lowust oseehi m.
Me:Thankyou.
Mama:Okaybaby.
Iendedt hecal l.
Olwet hu:Iam comi ngwi thyou.
Zethu:Soam I .
Buchul e:Whataboutt heki ds?
Me:Wewi l
ltaket hem wi thus.
Hel aughedandshookhi shead.
Him:Women.It oldyout hatt herewasnot hingt owor ryabout .
Zethu:Yeahyeah. ..
That '
sal lIhear d.Iwentt of reshenupandchanget oj eansandj ackett hent ookt hecarkeys.I
wentt odr esst heki dswar ml ythenwet ookt hem t ot hecari nthegar age, Buchul ebuckl ed
them ont heirseat sexceptf orNkosana.Iwasn' tgoi ngt ohaveaseati fhegott heseatsoI
carriedhi mi nmyar ms.Buchul edr oveusoutandt ot hehospi tal.
.
Whenwegott ot hehospi talBuchul epar kedt henIgotof fwi t
hOl wet hu, Zethuwasgoi ngto
stayi nt hecarwi tht heki ds.Shedi dn'tmi nd.Whenwewal kedintothedoorwespot tedMandl a,
hewaswi thLubanzi andYandi sa'smot her.Ol wet hur ani nt oMandl a'sar msr egar dlessher
mot her 'spr esence, theyhuggedandheki ssedherf or ehead.HowIwi shYandi sacoul ddot hat
ri
ghtnow.Igott ot hem andhuggedmamat henshookhandswi thLubanzi ,
Ihaven' tseenhi m
si
ncet hedayYandi sapunchedhi m.Fel tl
ikeages.
Me:SocanIseehi m?
Mama:Thedoct orsai d5mi nut es.
Me:5mi nut es.
Shenoddedandshowedmet ohi sr oom.Lucki lyhewasawakeandst aringupatt heceili
ng.
Whenhehear dt hedoorcl osehel ookedati tsdi recti
on, hesmi l
edwhenhesawmeandhel d
outhishandf orme.Il iterall
yr ant ohi m andhuggedhi m.
Him:Hey
Ipull
edawayandsatont hebed.
Me:Iwaswor riedt hatIwasn' tgoi ngt oseeyouagai n.
Him:Iam sor ry.
Hetookmyhandandki ssedi t.
Me:Whatwer eyouar rest edf or?
Him:IgotChant ell
ef iredt oday, shegotmadandhadmear r
ested.
Me:For ?
Him:Sexualassaul tandphysi calassaul t.
Me:Di dyou?
Him:NobabeIdi dn' t
,Imeanwedi dn't.Whywoul dwedot hat ?
Me:Idon' tknow, whywoul dshel ie?
Him:Becausesheknowst hatMandl aandIar er esponsi blef orherfather'sdeathbutshehas
noproofagai nstus.Sosheusedwhathappenedt oheri nJohannesbur gagainstus,honest l
yI
wasscar edt hatwewer egoi ngt ogodownf ori tbutl uckil
ySi nghcoul dpr ovethatwewer eno
wherenearherwhent hathappenedt oher .Andt hatwedi dn'tbeatherupt oday.
Inodded.
Him:Youbel ievemer ight ?
Me:Ido, Iwasj ustmaki ngsur e.Iknowyouwoul dn'tdot hat.
Him:Thankyou.Shehasbeenpl anni ngt ogetbackatmef orbreakingherhear tf
orages,when
Smithr eleasedherof fherdut iest odayshel osti tandst artedthreateningme.Sayi ngthati fshe
can'
thavemeyouwontei ther.
Whatt he? !
Me:Shei scr azy.
Him:Tel lmeabouti t,justbecar ef ulnebabe?I 'l
laskmom t omovei nwi thyouguysunt ilIam
bett
er.
Inodded.
Me:Soyouf orgaveher ?
Him:Notr eal l
y.Shemi ghthavedonewhat everevi ldeedshedi dtomymot herbutshelovesme,
shewoul dgot ot heendoft hewor ldf orme.
Me:Iam gl adt hatyoucanseet hat ,sher eallylovesyoul i
keherown.
Him:Yeahbutdoyoust il
lloveme?
Me:Howcanyouaskt hat ?
Him:Becauseofal ltheshi tIputyout hrough, Ij ustthought .
..
Ibentandki ssedhi slips, cuttinghi m shor t.Hehel dt hebackofmyheadandr espondedtomy
ki
ss,leavi ngmegr eedyf ormor et hanj ustaki ss.Hej ustdi dwonder st ome, t
hewayheki ssed
me,thewayhi st onguest rokemi neandhowhegent l
ybi t
emyl owerlipt hentheupperlip.
Mmmm!Myt emper atur er osei mmedi atel
y.
Me:Idon' tthinkIcaneverst opl ovi ngyou.
Him:Idon' tthinkIcaneverst opl ovi ngyouei t
her .
Ismiledandbabyki ssedhi m.
Me:Doyouki ssal lyourwomenl iket his?
Him:Idon' thavewomen, Ihaveawomanandpl easedon' teveraskmet hatquesti
onagai n.
Me:Why?
Him:Becausei tsr idicul ous.
Me:Iwasj ustcur i
ous.
Him:Iknowsowher ear et heki ds?Ourbabi es?
Me:Int hecar .
Him:Wi thwho?Ihopeyoudi dn' tleavet hem al onei nt here.Ar etheywar m?Phumzaawuci ngi
j
eez.
Ilaughed, Iwassor tofwonder ingwher ehel efthis" jeez" .
Me:Theyar ewi thZet huandBuchul e, yourmot hertooIt hink.Andyest heyar ewar m, Buchul e
hadt heheat eronf ort hem whenIgotof f.
Him:That 'scoolt hen.
Me:Yeahwhodi dyougeti naf ightwi t
h?
Him:Someguyi nt hehol dingcel l
.
Me:Why?
Him:Becausehet houghtwewer ebi tches.
Me:It houghtyouhat edt hatname.
Him:Notanymor e, somepeopl ereal lydeser vet obecal ledbi t
ches.
Me:Li keChant elle?
Him:Shei st hemot herofmychi l
dbutyeah.
Ismi l
edandpl ayedwi thhi slongf inger s.
Me:Iam gl adyouar eoutoft hatpl ace.
Him:Comeher e, sleepnextt ome.
Heshi ftedsoIcoul dsl eepnextt ohi m, Ilaidonmysi deandputmyar m overhi swai st.
Him:Iam gl adt oo.Ihavet ot hankt hatman, Singh.Hei sgoodathi sjob, hemakest hings
happen.
Me:Hedoes.Yayapl easepr omi semet hatyouwi l
lst ayawayf r
om Chant el l
e.
Him:Ihavel ear ntmyl esson.
Me:Pr omi seYandi sa.
Him:Ipr omi se, nawest ayawayf rom her .Iwoul dhat ei tifsomet hinghappenedt oyou.
Me:Iwi ll
.MrSmi thwant edmet of etchyourbel ongi ngsf rom theof fi
cet oday.
Him:Youcanf et cht hem butheknowst hatwear enotgui l
tysoher einstat edus.
Me:Yourl awyert oldhi m al ready?
Him:Si nghwant edt heof fi
cef ootaget opr ovet hatshehi therselfandhesawi twhent heywer e
goingt hroughi tt oget her .Shewal kedoutofmyof fi
cei ngoodshapeandwentt ot hebat hr
oom,
shewal kedoutoft hebat hroom br uisedsot hatsayswedi dn'tgivehert hosebr uisesonher
face.Thenheshowedhi mt hei nfor mat ionhegat heredonourwher eabout s,ever ything
checkedout .Wewer en' tnearherwhenshewasr apedandbeat enup, herdoct orf rom
Johannesbur ghospi tal andt hest afffrom t hel odgevouchedf orus, t
heysentt hecct vf ootage
andt heirr ecor dst oSi ngh.Thehot elwest ayedi nwhi lewewer etherewer ehappyt osendt hei
r
footageandr ecor dst oo.Ever yonewasmor et hanhappyt ohel pus.Myi nandoutf li
ght sfrom
Swazi l
andt oCapet ownt henCapet ownt oSwazi l
andcheckedout ,Iwasnowher enearherso
her ei
nst atedus.Andt hepr osecut orletusgo, theyhavenocaseagai nstus.Theyar el ooking
forther ealcul pr i
t snow.
Thatwomani ssi ck.
Me:DoesChant elleknow?
Him:I fshedi dn'tknowt hennowshedoes, Iam sur et heycal l
edhert ol etherknow.
Me:Shemustber eal lymadatyou.
Him:Idon' tcar e, Iam overt hat .Ineverwantt oseeheragai n, Iwantnot hingt odowi t
hhernow.
Me:Youst illshar eachi ldt oget her .
Him:Iwi llstillbui ldar elationshi pwi thhi m, Ijustwanthi smot herfarawayf rom met hat '
sal l
.
Inoddedandl ookedupathi m.Hel ookeddownatmeandki ssedmyf orehead.
Him:Il oveyou.
Ismi l
ed.Iwasgl adt ohavehi m backher ewi thme, Iwoul dhavedi edifhest ayedi npr ison.