Marinara

A game about family, emigration and cooking together, by Graham Walmsley.

What you need to play

You also need five or more players, plus one facilitator. Player numbers are flexible, so don’t
worry if someone drops out or arrives unexpectedly.

You need cards or sticky notes to write on, a few for each player.

Finally, you need one ingredient for each player, which will make a tomato sauce. Use the
following list to work out what you need, counting from the top and stopping when you get to
your number of players. For example, if you have five players, you need tomatoes, red onions, a
herb, Parmesan cheese and olive oil.

1. Fresh, ripe tomatoes, the best you can find (about 1-2 for each player).
2. Red onions (about 1 for every four players)
3. A fresh herb, preferably basil (a good bunch for every four or so players).
4. Olive oil (a bottle)
5. Parmesan cheese (as much as you can, at least 150g/5oz for every four or so players)
6. Black pepper in a grinder (a grinderful)
7. Lemon (two or three)
8. Black olives (about 10 per player)
9. Sundried tomatoes (about 3 per player)
10. Pepper flakes (a jar or bag full).
11. Brown sugar (a bag full, although you won’t use that much).
12. Red peppers (two or three)
13. Salt, preferably a good quality sea salt (a packet, although you’ll just use a pinch)
14. Another fresh herb, perhaps rosemary or thyme (a few sprigs)
15. Celery (one bunch)
16. Butter (a packet)
17. Capers (a jar)
18. Anchovies, mushroom sauce or soy sauce, for a savoury taste (a few anchovies or a
dash of sauce)

You’ll need enough of each ingredient to make a tomato sauce for all the players, plus enough
to taste a few times. Suggested quantities are listed above. Get the best quality you can find.
If you can, ask players to bring ingredients themselves. You (and they) can improvise a little: the
first four ingredients in the above list are essential, but after that, you can include other things
that might work in a tomato sauce. Proscuitto ham, red peppers and butter would all work well.

Before assigning ingredients, check everyone’s dietary requirements. If you leave out the
parmesan cheese, the ingredients in the list above should be suitable for vegetarians and
vegans.

Note that, while cooking, the players might use other ingredients, especially garlic and salt.

You also want a simple but good dessert, such as a box of chocolates.

Arriving
As the players arrive, ask them to separate each ingredient into two: in the kitchen, they
should put enough of the ingredient to cook with; on the table, they should put enough to taste.

They might also like to prepare the ingredient on the table for tasting: for example, cut the
lemon into slices, slice the parmesan cheese thinly and have a plate and teaspoon ready to
taste the olive oil. Note that ingredients should be tasted alone: for example, the olive oil
shouldn’t be tasted with bread.

If the players brought an ingredient, ask them to write where it came from, in one or two
simple sentences. For example, “This came from a market stall, run by a friendly woman from
the Philippines.” If you brought the ingredients, you should write this. Place the description next
to the ingredient.

Tell everyone that this is a game about a family who came to this country two generations ago
and who cook together every year.

Ask the players to join you at the table. Those who want to play someone older should sit to
your left, those who want to play someone younger should sit to your right. Explain that all the
characters are adults: that is, the younger characters are at least in their late teens.

Tasting
Now ask everyone to choose an ingredient that appeals to them. It shouldn’t be the ingredient
they bought.
Ask them to get ready to taste their ingredient. Encourage them to be positive as they do,
especially for the more challenging ingredients: for example, if someone is eating a lemon, they
might focus on its freshness rather than its sourness.

When everyone is ready, ask them to taste their ingredient as follows. They should take a
bite, focus deeply on the flavour, imagine time is slowing down, then slowly come back
into the room, bringing the feeling from the food with them. Take these instructions slowly,
leaving a pause between them.

Ask everyone in turn what they tasted. Whatever their answers, ask them to write them
down.

Ask them to taste their ingredient again, trying to focus on a different element of the flavour.
Take a bite, focus on the flavour, imagine time slowing down, then bring the feeling back into the
room. And write whatever they tasted on an index card.

Tell them that, when the game starts, they should do the same when they taste food: take a bite,
focus on the flavour, imagine time slowing down, then bring the feeling back into the room.

Now, ask them to choose another ingredient, which they think would go well with their
ingredient, and taste the two together. Take a bite, focus on the flavour, imagine time slowing
down and bring the feeling back. Ask them to write down whatever they tasted, noting the name
of the other ingredient.

Next, ask them to choose an ingredient that they think will make a challenging
combination. Again, they should take a bite, focus on the flavour, imagine time slowing down
and bring the feeling back. Again, ask them to write down whatever they tasted, noting the
name of the other ingredient.

Finally, ask them to choose another ingredient that appeals to them. Again, they should take
a bite, focus on its flavour, imagine time slowing down, then bring whatever they feel back into
the room. Ask them again to write what they tasted, noting what the other ingredient was.

The family
Tell everyone that this is a game about the Faccenda family, who moved here from the Old
Country two generations ago. Ask them to imagine that the Old Country is a bit like Italy, but not
to be strict about it: for example, they shouldn’t worry about whether their image of Italy is
correct. Ask them not to worry about playing an Italian family accurately, but to avoid Italian
stereotypes.
Every year, the Faccenda family get together and cook a meal. It’s the same meal every
year, a rustic pasta alla marinara, and everyone brings one ingredient. They don’t see each
other much outside of this meal, unless they are immediate family members.

Wherever you are playing, that is where the game is set. If you are in someone’s house in
London, that’s where the Faccenda family live; if you are in a rented cottage in the United
States, that’s where the Faccenda family are on vacation. Everything in the space is what it
appears to be: a pan is a pan, a newspaper is a newspaper, a smartphone is a smartphone.

Tell people the tone for the game. It’s not about a story of family love conquering all; it’s not a
story of all-out family conflict; but something in between. It’s about a family with both love and
tension, but an underlying bond beneath it all.

Tell players to your left that they are the older generation: they decided to move here as adults
and their memories of the Old Country date from childhood. Tell players to your right that they
are the younger generation: they grew up here and only know the Old Country from visiting it.
Tell players in the middle that they are the middle generation: they moved here in childhood
and may have conflicted, confused memories of the Old Country. (There is no strict dividing line
between generations: for example, someone who is in front of you and to your left might either
belong to the older or middle generation.)

Ask players to think of a name for the person they are playing, which is an English name, not
Italian. (Imagine that the older and middle generations have anglicised their names, while the
younger generation have always had English names.)

Ask them to decide how they are related to each other. Tell them that simple relationships are
best: that is, parents, children, brothers and sisters. Ideally, the older generation are parents of
the middle generation, while the middle generation are parents of the younger generation, with
perhaps some additional brothers and sisters.

Now, ask them to decide what their family member is like and how they relate to the
others, as follows:

● Use whatever they wrote about their ingredient on its own to decide what their
character is like.
● Use whatever they wrote about tasting their ingredient with another ingredient to decide
their relationship with the other character.
● Use whatever they wrote about tasting another ingredient on its own to decide a special
insight into another character, which may be true or false.

Tell them everyone that their character has about the same level of cooking skill that they
do: for example, if someone is good at cooking, their character is good at cooking. Additionally,
if the space you are playing in belongs to one of the players, tell them that their character
owns the place the family is meeting. Both these things avoid awkward situations later: for
example, it prevents a situation where someone who is meant to be a good cook does not know
how to chop an onion or someone who is meant to own the house does not know where
anything is kept.

Give them a while to make characters, helping them through the process. Try asking them
questions: what’s your job? Did you live with your parents? What was that like? Do you still live
with them? How was your relationship when you were younger?

If they get stuck, tell them to try tasting the food to help them: for example, they can taste their
own ingredient to decide something about their own character or taste their ingredient with
another ingredient to decide how they feel about someone else.

Finally, tell them that whatever their ingredient is, they brought it to the meal. They have a
card that tells them where they got their ingredient (which is the card written by the player who
actually brought it). Sometimes, you might need to think about what these means or adapt it
slightly: for example, if someone has written “My husband bought this for me”.

Now, tell them that when they got their ingredient, something happened that made them
feel they didn’t fit in in this country. Whatever happens, it was something symptomatic of a
deeper conflict inside them, something about who they are, and something linked to the Old
Country. This is complex, so talk them through this and help them decide.

(Sometimes, players think of an identity issue that isn’t linked to the Old Country. If so,
encourage them to underline that issue with something about the Old Country: for example, if
they are gay, ask them to think about attitudes to homosexuality in the Old Country.)

Safety rules
Tell the players that games about family can get surprisingly emotional. It’s important they
take care of themselves and each other.

Tell them that the door is always open. They can step outside any time if they need a break.
They can also leave completely: you’d prefer it if they told you, but they don’t have to. Remind
them that, if they leave, the game still works.

Tell them to call “cut” (or “freeze”) if they need the game to stop for a moment, either because
they feel too emotional or someone has been injured. Remind them that someone might cut or
burn themselves while cooking: if this happens, they should make a judgement about whether to
handle it in character or not.
Getting ready to play
Ask everyone to discuss how to cook a tomato sauce from the ingredients they have. During
the discussion, bring the following points up, unless someone else does:

● Since the ingredients taste good raw, they’ll taste good mixed together. This makes it
hard to go wrong.
● They should probably cook the onion first, until it is soft. After that, they can basically
throw everything else in and it will make a good sauce.
● They don’t need to do much to the tomatoes other than chop them. Skinning them and
deseeding them takes a while and isn’t necessary for a rustic meal. If they like, they
could take the hard cores out as they chop, but they don’t have to.
● They can cook the tomatoes for as long as they like. 5 minutes will make a fresh-tasting
sauce, 30 minutes or more will make an intense, thick but liquid tomato sauce.
● They should start chopping the tomatoes and onions as soon as possible.

Tell them how the family dinner works, which also shows how the game is structured:

● If any family members live in the space where the meal will be cooked, they start there.
Everyone else starts outside.
● They’ll arrive gradually, in whatever groups seem natural. For example, if the middle
generation are a married couple, they might arrive together. (If they want to start
roleplaying in these groups before they enter, they are welcome.)
● They all cook together. Tell them that, at one point, you’ll interrupt to give them some
quick instructions.
● When the meal is placed on the table, you’ll pause the game and do an exercise.
Ask them to take any breaks, such as bathroom breaks, they need before then. In
practice, this means that, when the pasta starts cooking, they should take a break if they
need to.
● When they have finished, they take a break before dessert. They might talk to each
other, finish wine or do something else. Eventually, someone places dessert on the table,
but nobody starts before everyone is seated. They should finish anything they want to do
before dessert.
● When dessert is on the table, you’ll do a final exercise and end the game.

Adjust these instructions depending on the time and space you have to play. For example, if you
have a whole afternoon and evening to play, tell them that they are welcome to find things to do
before dinner. For practical reasons, you might want to decide that some ingredients (especially
tomatoes and onions) start in the room, so the cooking can start: perhaps, for example, they
were left there earlier.
Ask everyone whether they are ready to start. Answer any questions.

Tell people that, in the time before dinner, they should:

● Renew their relationships with other family members. Find out how these relationships
are now. Are they the same or have they changed?
● Share their troubles with someone, especially that feeling they don’t fit in, but don’t
resolve them. Let them simmer.

Do a brief guided meditation. First, ask everyone to focus deeply on that feeling that they don’t
fit in. Then ask them to close their eyes and imagine the Old Country: ask them to imagine how
it feels, what it looks like, the sounds they can hear. Give them a moment, then ask them to
open their eyes.

Ask everyone to take their positions and begin the game.

Before dinner
Let everyone play and facilitate as necessary.

Some time before dinner, raise your hand and pause the game. Tell everyone to focus on the
feeling of being out of place and imagine it intensifying and deepening. Then ask them to carry
on. (A good time to do this is often when the tomatoes go into the pan.)

When the meal is on the table, pause the game again. Tell everyone to close their eyes and
picture the old country, imagining how beautiful it is. Then ask them open their eyes and taste
the food. Tell them to focus deeply on the flavour, imagine time slowing down, then bring
whatever they feel back into the room. Then ask them to carry on.

When dessert is on the table, pause the game for one last time. Tell everyone to picture the
Old Country again. Then ask them to open their eyes and taste dessert. Ask them to focus
deeply on its sweetness and imagine it growing, getting more and more intense. Then tell them
that is the end of the game.

Debrief
Remember that games about family can be fairly intense, so take the time to talk with your
players afterwards.

Tell them that you want them to talk through their experience, to bring them slowly out of
the game. Tell them that, for now, you don’t want feedback on the game itself.
Ask everyone in turn to say something about the game. It can be something they liked, a
moment they remember, something they’re burning to say or anything they like.

Ask everyone in turn to say something that sticks in their mind about the game.

Now remind everyone that they are not their characters. Ask everyone in turn to say something
about their character they’d like to take away and something they’d like to leave behind.

Finally, facilitate a general discussion about the game.