THEOLOGY II CHRISTIAN VISION OF MARRIAGE AND THE FAMILY

CO URS E NO TES

UNIT II

Christian Perspective of Marriage

A. The Biblical Perspective
MARRIAGE IN THE OLD TESTAMENT I. Marriage in Creation

In recent times, the understanding of marriage has been so muddled and blurred that a return to its biblical
bases becomes necessary in order to recover the real purpose of God for man and woman. The gift of
marriage, both as social institution and as a sacrament, traces its origins in the Book of Genesis ―as
willed by God in the very act of creation.‖1 This enacts God‘s plan of including marriage in the very
center of the ―Creation, Fall and Redemption of man.‖2 Looking through the procreationist view of the
Priestly Tradition in Gen. 1:26-28, 31 and the personalist view of the Yahwist Tradition in Genesis 2:18-
25, one arrives at the presumption that both traditions form the foundations of marriage.

―The Lord God said: It is not good for man to be alone. I will make him a suitable partner... The man
gave names to all the cattle, all the birds of the air, and all the wild animals; but none proved to be the
suitable partner for man. So the Lord God cast a deep sleep on the man and while was asleep, He took out
one of man‘s ribs and closed up its place with flesh. The Lord God then built up into a woman the rib He
had taken from the man. When He brought her to the man, the man said: This one, at last is bone of my
bones and flesh of my flesh; this one shall be called woman for out her man this one has been taken. That
is why man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife and the two of them become one body.‖ –
Gen. 2:18; 20-25

Delving deeper the origin of marriage in Genesis, we begin with God mentioning that ―it is not good for
man to be alone.‖ It is worth noting that of all the things in creation where God has declared good,3 the
̳being alone of man‘ was the sole exemption from the regard of God. This ―solitude of man‖4 implies
two meanings: first, is man‘s very nature [male and female] while the second is derived from the male-
female relationship.

In the first meaning, man was tasked to name ―every beast of the field and every bird of the air‖5 in
which man becomes aware of his own authority over the other living beings on earth. Because of this
conscious search for his own identity, man came to the conclusion that none is and will be suitable to be
his equal. From this conclusion springs the second meaning to which the ̳aloneness‘ of man necessitated
the creation of the woman. We are reminded of the reply Christ mentioned in Matthew 19 when he said:
―Have you not read that the Creator from the beginning made them male and female?‖ This creation of
man and woman provides the source of equality for both, forming an indivisible union with each other.

1 St. John Paul II. Familiaris Consortio:The Christian Family in the Modern World (hereafter FC), (Catholic Truth Society,
1981), no. 3

2 Catechism of the Catholic Church (hereafter CCC), (Paulines Publications Africa, 1992), no. 1602. 3 Genesis 1:31. 4 St. John
Paul II. The Redemption of the Body and Sacramentality of Marriage: Theology of the Body, (The Catholic Primer, 2005), 15-
17.

5 Gen. 2:19. 9
With God placing man into a deep sleep,6 it becomes an opening salvo for the next creative act of God.
This deep sleep ―indicates a return to the moment preceding the creation.‖7 The solitary man enters into
sleep as one being then re-emerges from slumber as male and female. It would be worth noting that God
used the rib of man to form the woman in order to show that they are actually the same created being, two
halves of a whole and that man and woman together make ―Man.‖ St. John Paul II deepens this insight in
the following analogy:

―The Bible calls the first human being ―man‖ (`adam), but from the moment of the creation of the first
woman, it begins to call him ―man‖ (ish), in relation to ishshah, ―woman‖ because she was taken from
man—ish.‖8

The woman was made from the very same element of man and was every bit as perfect a creation and
every bit patterned after God‘s image and likeness. Abel Isaksson furthers the reason why woman was
taken from the rib of man by discussing that the real purpose of removing a rib from man was not to
merely form a biologically compatible creature with man since that can be accomplished with God
creating another being from clay. A deeper purpose is shown in this unique act of creating woman:
kinship.9 John Keller supports this insight of Isaksson and adds:

―When God removed a rib from Adam, He did more than just create another man, He created a man
with the same genes, blood type, DNA and physical characteristics. He created kinfolk. God‘s existence is
eternal kinship. God‘s image and likeness would be an earthly kinship; man‘s kinship would be
dependent on that kinship...‖ Man was created family. Trinity and Family are divine synonyms. God is a
family (Father, Son and Holy Spirit). Man is a family (father, mother, son)‖10

With the knowledge of kinship as a purpose for removing a rib from man in the creation of woman, this
presents a strong and indissoluble bond that is present between man and woman. With the bond between
man and woman in place, it paves the way for the creation of a child where man finally reaches the
ultimate form of kinship: family. Johannes Pedersen explains: ―In the family, the chief thing is kinship...
For the Israelite it is a matter of course that common flesh makes common character. Therefore, mishpaha
or family is the designation of those who are of the same kind, have the same essential features and it is
the essential factor of community‖11

With this in mind, mishpaha or family becomes a natural application by the Israelites for all human
beings because it encompasses humanity as a whole12 and the Israelites see these communities of
different races as communities of different families.

Deriving from the idea of the kinship of family, it is also worth noting that the creation of man and
woman reveals that they were created as a single pair13 in contrast to the other creatures in creation

6 Gen. 2:21. 7 St. John Paul II. The Redemption of the Body and Sacramentality of Marriage: Theology of the Body, (The
Catholic Primer, 2005), 22.

8 Ibid., 11. 9 Isaksson, Abel and Neil Tomkinson. Marriage and Ministry in the New Temple: A Study with Special Reference to
Mt. 19. 13-12 and 1 Cor. 11. 3-16, trans. Neil Tomkinson; (Lund; Enjar Munksgaard, 1965), 20; Also see Gen. 2; Lev. 18; and
Deut. 24 which also refer to kinship.

10 John D. Keller, Jesus’ Doctrine of Marriage, Divorce, Remarriage (Goose River Press, Waldoboro, Maine, 2006),14.

11 Johannes Pedersen, Israel: Its Life and Culture Vol. 1(Scholars Press Atlanta Georgia, 1991), 48. 12 Gen. 10:15,18; Ps. 22:27.
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that were made in large numbers. Compared to the rich variety of other creatures in creation, man and
woman was the only single pair that seemed to face extinction at the very beginning of history. The only
means of survival for their species was ―to be fruitful and multiply14‖ populating the earth. In order for
them to be fruitful and to multiply, man and woman must now balance this delicate relationship between
them in order to survive. With the fall from grace, it altered the once out-flowing and special relationship
between him and the woman making it more difficult for both of them to nurture and maintain their
relationship. With the overwhelming odds in favour of man‘s extinction, man relies on his faith in God15
in order to see hope and build a relationship between his family and God. It now becomes imperative for
man to sustain his faith and hope in God and let it lead him and his family in a marriage of love and
promise.

Prior to the creation of the woman, man does not completely realize his predicament of being ―alone‖
and only realizes this after meeting the woman and by ―existing with the woman‖ and come to fully
understand it by ―existing for woman.‖ John Paul II explains: ―Let us add that this finding of oneself in
giving oneself becomes the source of a new giving of oneself. This grows by virtue of the interior
disposition to the exchange of the gift and to the extent to which it meets with the same and even deeper
acceptance and welcome as the fruit of a more and more intense awareness of the gift itself.‖16

This recognition of kinship and gift of self between man and woman is encapsulated by the exclamation
of man upon meeting woman: ―This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh!‖17 With the
declaration that they are forever bound, man forms a covenant with woman which results in ―man
leaving his father and mother to be with the woman and they become one flesh‖ With man and woman
becoming one, they are now bound by oath to share every triumph and tragedy, weakness and strength
and both share their responsibility to God. The woman then, becomes a partner to man in their roles of s̳
ubduing‘ the earth. With this role, stems responsibilities and obligations toward each other in mutual trust
and fidelity which in turn grounds a covenantal relationship.

Lastly, the act where the woman was formed from man‘s rib raises questions as to why was the woman
specifically taken from the rib of man and not from any other parts of the man‘s body. Another question
is, why does it have to come from the body instead of being formed from dust of how the man was
created. 17th century English minister and author Matthew Henry provides a beautiful insight on the
reason why the woman was taken from the man‘s rib. He says: ―Women were created from the rib of
man to be beside him, not from his head to top him, nor from his feet to be trampled by him, but from
under his arm to be protected by him, near his heart to be loved by him.‖18

13 John D. Keller, Jesus’ Doctrine of Marriage, Divorce, Remarriage (Goose River Press, Waldoboro, Maine, 2006),12.

14 Gen. 1:28. 15 This is an echo of the words of Pope Francis in his homily during the Papal visit to Tacloban, Saturday, January
17, 2015: “And beside the cross was his Mother. We are like a little child in the moments when we have so much pain and no
longer understand anything. All we can do is grab hold of her hand firmly and say “Mommy” – like a child does when it is afraid.
It is perhaps the only words we can say in difficult times – “Mommy.””

16 St. John Paul II. The Redemption of the Body and Sacramentality of Marriage: Theology of the Body, (The Catholic Primer,
2005), 44.

17 There are two instances wherein “bone” and “flesh” referred to woman as wife. In Job 2: 5-9 where Job was stricken with
boils and his wife turns against him. Here, she is regarded as the final blow to Job’s physical ailment. While Ecclus. 25:26 states:
“A bad woman must be ‘cut off from’ her husband’s flesh.”

18 Matthew Henry, George Burder, Joseph Hughes and Samuel Palmer. An Exposition of the Old and New Testament. Ed.
Barrington & Geo. D. (Haswell Publisher, Philadelphia 1838).
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From Henry‘s reasoning, we glean that marriage is no longer seen as a mere sexual union of a couple but
rather something far more sublime. The complementarity of man and woman goes far beyond mere
sexual expression and instead encompasses the entirety of the human experience. Leonardo Boff adds:

―In fact, marriage seen on its own is already a sacramental sign of the love of two lives. Through it, the
meeting and flowering in love of an ―I‖ and a ―Thou‖ are expressed on the personal and social levels.
Human love, therefore, seen in its totality, possesses a transcendent need and dimension. In love, man
experiences fullness, the generosity of living for another, and the encounter that makes two one.
Nevertheless, he also knows that love can be threatened by infidelity, by separation and by death; he can
also find that the other is not the full and exhaustive answer to the longings of his heart. Man sighs for a
deep and lasting love. What he loves is not in fact just another person, but the mystery of personality,
revealed and made flesh in the loved one, but also veiled and withdrawn‖19

II. Marriage as practiced in the Old Testament

Even though the word only appears six times20 in the Old Testament and often times seen as purely a
civil contract21, marriage is still illustrated powerfully in the narratives seen in its books. To understand
how marriage is practiced in the Old Testament is to understand how Israel sees their relationship with
God as a marital relationship.22 As marriage is rooted in the Creation by Yahweh, the union of man and
woman was protected by the laws that governed the early Israelite society and is intertwined with its
history. Marriage and family, in ancient Jewish practice, have been one of the defining institutions of
Judaism for almost a thousand years.23 Consequently, what will be discussed in this area will be
consisting firstly of the marriage practices in the Old Testament and secondly, How marriage in the Old
Testament mirrors the marriage of Israel and Yahweh.

Marriage: The Practice

The stages of the Jewish marriage in the Old Testament consisted of [1] a contract or betrothal stage, in
which the terms of responsibility and payment were determined;24 the stage consists of the wedding
dowry or engagement gift which was usually offered by the bride‘s father.25 As soon as the gift is given
to the groom, the woman becomes the grooms‘ legal wife26 even though the marital relation has

19 Leonardo Boff, 1973. “The Sacrament of Marriage” in Concilium 7, n.9, 26. 20 Gen. 38:8; Ex. 21:10; Num. 36:6; Deut. 25:5;
Ps. 78:63; and Isa. 62:5. 21 According to the Mishnah (the first written major redaction of the Oral Torah), A wife is to be
acquired by money or by writ or by intercourse. Thus, in some cases, sexual intercourse alone was considered as a means to
constitute marriage; Isaksson, Abel and Neil Tomkinson. Marriage and Ministry in the New Temple: A Study with Special
Reference to Mt. 19. 13-12 and 1 Cor. 11. 3-16, trans. Neil Tomkinson; (Lund; Enjar Munksgaard, 1965), 125.

22 Jocelyn Hellig, “A Jewish Woman’s Reflections on the Pressure of Secularist and Hedonist Influences on the Traditional
Jewish Ideals of Marriage and Family,” Dialogue and Alliance: Journal of the International Religious Foundation 9, no. 1 (1995),
91.

23 Richard L. Rubenstein, “Marriage and the Family in Jewish Tradition,” Dialogue and Alliance: Journal of the International
Religious Foundation 9, no. 1(1995), 17.

24 Daniel Sinclair. “Marriage,” in The Oxford Dictionary of the Jewish Religion, eds. R. J. Zwi Werblowsky and Geoffrey
Wigoder. (Oxford: Oxford University Press, 1997), 423-424; also See Genesis 34:12; Exodus 22:17.

25 I Sam. 18:25-27; II Sam. 3:14. 26 Deut. 22:23-24. 12

not yet been consummated;27 [2] the consummation stage also known as the chuppah stage, wherein the
bride and groom would consummate their union in the chuppah, or bridal chamber28; and lastly, [3] the
seven blessings and the marriage supper, which includes seven days of feasting as a celebration of the
marriage while the seven blessings were recited over the couple.29 One can note how the matrimonial
process mirrors the covenant process namely, the declaration of terms, the confession and finalization of
oath and the fellowship meal.30

According to the Kiddushin,31 the minimum age for those willing to get married in the Jewish society of
the Old Testament was thirteen (13) for the boys and twelve (12) for girls. But acknowledging the reality
of the times, the Hebrew Talmud encouraged marriage after puberty, preferably sixteen to twenty four
and such marriages were usually arranged by the parents.32 Since the Israelites give high regard to
kinship, the choosing of a wife by either the parents or the groom himself usually is influenced by
relationships with family and the welfare of the tribe33 although relationships and marriages with very
close family members is strictly forbidden.34

In choosing an ideal woman, the book of Proverbs35 presents an image of an ideal woman in who is a
potential candidate to be the king‘s future wife. She will give birth to the future heir to the throne; she is
full of virtue who presents assurance to her husband because she does only good during her whole life.
Her chores are various: she works with wool and hemp, cooks and feeds the ones in the household,
manages the house activities when the husband is absent, she even takes care of small business, works the
land, and speaks wisely. All these bring her husband and sons‘ praise, as well as the community leaders‘
appreciation. To take such a woman into marriage meant, in the Israelite society, ―to find the good‖ and
getting a ―favour from God.‖36 Fertility, industriousness, and morality were the basis criteria in
choosing a wife and, implicitly, the most praised virtues of a woman in biblical writings. On the other
hand, the ideal virtues of a man can be seen in the narratives of Exodus which state that a man‘s duty was
that of always providing for his wife food, comfort and security. 37

Going back to the ritual performed in the marriage rite, the Old Testament provides little insight as to
what occurs. The mother could choose the wife for her son38 or can be a part of the decision making
process.39 The Song of Songs shows that the mother places a wreath on her son‘s head on the wedding
day.40 The groom as well as the bride have an entourage41 and among the entourage is ―the groom‘s
friend.‖42 It is implied that the wedding can take place in the bride‘s house43 or at the house of the
groom.44 The wedding ceremonies are long and includes fasting.45

27 Deut. 20:7; 28:30. 28 Solomon B.Freehof, “Huppah,” in The Oxford Dictionary of the Jewish Religion, eds. R. J. Zwi
Werblowsky and Geoffrey Wigoder. (Oxford: Oxford University Press. 1997), 341; See also 1 Jn. 2:16; Ps. 19:6

29 Normon Solomon, “Marriage” in Historical Dictionary of Judaism. (Rowman & Littlefield, 2015), 243 30 William A.
Dyrness,“Themes in the Old Testament Theology” (InterVarsity Press, 1980), 118-119 31 Kiddushin is Hebrew which refers to
sanctification or dedication, also called erusin (betrothal), the first of the two stages of the Jewish wedding process.

32 Judg. 21:21; Gen. 24:2, 29:23; Tob. 6:13. 33 Gen. 24:4. 34 Lev. 18:6. 35 Prov. 31:10-31. 36 Prov. 18:22. 37 Ex. 21:10. 38
Gen. 21:21. 39 Gen. 27:46; 28:7; Judg. 14:2-3. 40 Songs of Sol. 3:11. 41 Judg. 14:11. 42 Judg. 14:20; 15:2; Jn. 3:29.

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With regard to the authority between the husband and wife relationship, many would think that since the
Israelite society followed a patriarchal framework, it would follow that the husband is the master or
owner of the family and of his wife‘s person as well. This belief, framed under the title of the husband:
―ba‟al” focuses more on the procreative responsibilities of the wife in the marriage. The husband does
not own the wife‘s person, but her sexuality. Catalin Vatamanu elaborates:
―In marriage, a man did not have a property right over his wife, but exclusive rights over her sexuality
and fertility, by extension, over the children resulted from the fruitfulness of their marriage. In this
context, the use of baal meant, undoubtedly, the expression of the husband‘s authority, the idea of his
property over his wife‘s sexuality and fertility. It follows that the concept of legitimate property is applied
to a woman only before marriage, when she is the property of her father who is responsible for it. In other
words, the only meaning in which the woman could be described as ―property‖ would be her status as a
daughter, not as a wife.‖46

Once the wife becomes a mother, the role of motherhood becomes a patent of nobility47 for the woman
where she acquires a place in the family as well as a share in the authority of the husband over the
children. And even though the authority of the father supersedes those of the mother as regards the
welfare of the family, the father and mother are still mentioned together and given the same manner of
respect by the children and thus, presents a deep relationship of reverence between the children and their
parents.

Covenant: A Marriage between God and His people

Proceeding to the second part of the topic, marriage in the Old Testament mirrors the marriage of Israel
with Yahweh. Throughout the scriptures, Yahweh describes His covenant with His chosen people in
terms of marriage which implies how it is highly regarded by God:

―The Time is coming,‖ declares the Lord, ―when I will make a new covenant with the house of Israel
and with the house of Judah. It will not be like the covenant I made with their forefathers when I took
them by the hand to lead them out of Egypt, because they broke my covenant, though I was a husband to
them,‖ declares the Lord.‖- Malachi 2:13- 16

This covenantal relationship of Israel and God is often illustrated as that of a husband (Yahweh) and wife
(Israel) in stark comparison with the polytheistic neighboring countries around Israel. Leland Ryken et al.
explains that ―the Israelites‘ monotheistic stance distinguished Judaism from the polytheism of other
ancient religions; the idea of monogamy thus, underlies figurative prostitution accusations. God‘s

43 Gen.29:22; Tob. 8:19; Mt. 25. 44 Mt. 22:1-14; Jn 2:9-10. 45 Judg.14:10-12, Jer. 7:34; I Macc.9:39; Tob. 8:19; Jn. 2. 46
Catalin Vatamanu, “Marriage in the Old Testament. A Social Reality and a Theological Metaphor Reflected in the Biblical
Rhetoric”; Text si discurs religios, (2016): 5.

47 Johannes Pedersen, Israel: Its Life and Culture Vol. 1. in South Florida Studies in the History of Judaism, ed. Jacob Neusner,
William Scott Green, James Strange, Darrel J. Fasching and Sara Mandel (Scholars Press Atlanta Georgia , 1991), 71.

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covenant with Israel is comparable to a monogamous marriage; he provides for her, raises her to a special
place of honor and asks her to support his plan.‖48

The prophets of the Old Testament saw a monogamous relationship in the marriage of Yahweh with his
people and thus, presented the image of Israel as the one wife who was chosen by the God with whom
they formed a covenant with. This marriage between Yahweh and Israel presents God as the
compassionate and patient husband who loves his wife even in times of great conflict and aggravation. He
maintains His steadfastness in His covenant with His people despite their many flaws and abuses.49

The prophet Hosea, instructed by God to marry Gomer, an adulterous wife, illustrates a theological
example for Israel for from this story, by worshiping the gods of foreign countries, Israel dishonors their
covenant relationship with God.50 In the story of Hosea, the punishment of the unfaithful wife becomes a
clear symbol of the punishment of the people of Israel.51 In fact, the book of Hosea unveils the enduring
divine love of God for a sinful people. This covenant of God to his people is a covenant of mercy,
reconciliation and restoration that extends all throughout the history of Israel as a nation. The parallels
between marriage and covenant indicate that God intended marriage to be a lifelong and exclusive
relationship. David Atkinson points out the similarities between marriage and God‘s covenant: ―an
initiative of love, inviting a response, creating a relationship, making a vow of consent, guarding the
union, upholding faithfulness, the promise of blessing to the faithful and finally, sacrifice.‖52

For the prophet Jeremiah, he called for the repentance of his people for their infidelity:

―Go and proclaim in the hearing of Jerusalem: ―This is what the LORD says: ― ̳I remember the
devotion of your youth, how as a bride you loved me and followed me through the wilderness, through a
land not sown. Israel was holy to the LORD, the first fruits of his harvest; all who devoured her were held
guilty, and disaster overtook them,‘‖ declares the LORD.‖‖ – Jeremiah 2: 2-3

It was during the time of Jeremiah where the relationship of Israel with Yahweh was greatly stressed due
to their infidelity and sin and no wonder Jeremiah recalls the love of Yahweh for his people as to how a
husband loves his wife which was vividly captured in the scripture passage cited above. Robert Caroll
delves deeper into this statement of Jeremiah by saying:

―The strong emotions behind the language are apparent, and the oracles share the same atmosphere of
outrage, pain and jealousy as may be found in Hosea. The roots of the metaphoric language are probably
to be found in the cult of the incomparable Yahweh, the jealous God, who did not permit other gods to be
associated with his worship (Ex.20:3; Deut. 5:7). As a man did not permit his wife to take lovers or go off
after other men, so the deity did not permit the community to worship other gods‖53

48 Ed. Leland Ryken, James C. Wilhoit, and Tremper Longman, III., “Prostitute, Prostitution” in Dictionary of Biblical Imagery;
(Downers Grove: InterVarsity, 1998), 677.

49 Is. 54:6; 62:4; Jer. 3:1; Ezek. 16:32; Hosea 1:2; Mal. 2:11-14. 50 Hosea 2:18; 3:1-5. 51 Hosea 2:4-15. 52 David Atkinson,. To
Have and to Hold. (Glassgow: Colins, 1979), 75. 53 Robert P. Caroll, 1981. From Chaos to Covenant: Uses of Prophecy in the
Book of Jeremiah, London, SCM (1981), 61.

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Despite the love, honor and respect bestowed by God upon Israel, like a husband who showers his wife
with affection, Israel chose to leave Yahweh behind in search of other gods, breaking their bond and
covenant:

―This is what the LORD says: ―What fault did your ancestors find in me, that they strayed so far from
me? They followed worthless idols and became worthless themselves.‖‖-Jer. 2:5

―Long ago you broke off your yoke and tore off your bonds; you said, ̳I will not serve you!‘ Indeed, on
every high hill and under every spreading tree you lay down as a prostitute.‖-Jer. 2:20

With the unfaithfulness of Israel in contrast to the steadfast love of Yahweh, Jeremiah recognizes this
adultery of Israel54 and calls for a journey of penitence, reconciliation and renewal of the broken bond
between them and God.55 This renewed relationship is exemplified in the introduction of a new covenant
made by Yahweh:
―At that time,‖ declares the LORD, ―I will be the God of all the families of Israel, and they will be my
people... I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness. I will build
you up again, and you, Virgin Israel, will be rebuilt. Again you will take up your timbrels and go out to
dance with the joyful.‖ –Jer. 31:1, 3-4

―The days are coming,‖ declares the LORD, ―when I will make a new covenant with the people of
Israel and with the people of Judah. It will not be like the covenant I made with their ancestors when I
took them by the hand to lead them out of Egypt, because they broke my covenant, though I was a
husband to them,‖ declares the LORD. ―This is the covenant I will make with the people of Israel after
that time,‖ declares the LORD. ―I will put my law in their minds and write it on their hearts. I will be
their God, and they will be my people. No longer will they teach their neighbor, or say to one another,

̳Know the LORD,‘ because they will all know me, from the least of them to the greatest,‖ declares the
LORD. ―For I will forgive their wickedness and will remember their sins no more.‖-Jer. 31:31-34

Rabbi Albert Plotkin elaborates the covenant mentioned above by showing the deep love God has for His
people:

―Jeremiah also employed God‘s falling in love with His people for he was loyal in His love to His
people. The people went after other lovers and made sacrifices to other gods. Jeremiah, nevertheless, felt
that love was the very foundation stone for the idea of Covenant. God alone was Divine, Husband and
Protector, and Israel was exclusively his.

In the beginning, Israel was only with her God and the depths of her vows, as marriage vows, of loyalty,
were expressed through chesed (Heb. Loving-kindness) and through ahava, love. These two words were
integral to Covenant as Jeremiah lived and understood it. He felt that the marriage took place in Israel‘s
history. The prophet recalls the event as a solemn reminder of the word zochor, memory, and the
marriage vows as the most important factor in renewing the value of Covenant.‖56

54 Jer. 3:1, 4. 55 Jer. 11:1-7. 56 Albert Plotkin, 1999. Jeremiah’s Concept of Covenantal Relationship, ed. Judith T. Borras and
Angel Saenz- Badillos, vol. 1, Jewish studies at the turn of the Twentieth Century, Proceedings of the 6th EAJS Congress Toledo,
July 1998 Volume 1: Biblical, Rabbinical, and Medieval Studies(Netherlands: Brill), 174.

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MARRIAGE IN THE NEW TESTAMENT I. Marriage in the Gospels

In dealing with marriage in the New Testament, like its counterpart, the Old Testament, it endorses and
demonstrates the same sound doctrine of marriage. Like the Old Testament wherein marriage is typically
used to illustrate the relationship of Yahweh to His people, so does the New Testament illustrate the
union of Christ and the Church, finally elevating marriage to its eternal state while still fully defending its
original intent. Marriage can be seen throughout the Gospels in the key events in Jesus‘s life. From the
relationship of Joseph and Mary, to the wedding feast at Cana, to the scathing sermon of John the Baptist,
and parables shared by Christ, marriage is at the core of Jesus‘ life and teachings.

It is often taught that Jesus is the fulfilment of the Old Covenant57 and if the covenant in the Old
Testament includes marriage and mirrors the marriage of Yahweh with His chosen people, then marriage
finds fulfilment in Jesus. Douglas Moo supports this by relating: ―In his direct statements about the law,
Jesus upholds the continuing validity of the entire Old Testament Scriptures, but also asserts that this
validity must be understood in the light of its fulfilment.‖58
In Christ, God brings back creation to its original unimpeded state.59 Christ in turn, fulfils marriage and
transforms it in the intended image and plan of God. Jesus‘ own remarks in the Gospel of Mark point to
this direction:

―And Pharisees came up and in order to test him asked, ―Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife?‖ He
answered them, ―What did Moses command you?‖ They said, ―Moses allowed a man to write a
certificate of divorce and to send her away.‖ And Jesus said to them, ―Because of your hardness of heart
he wrote you this commandment. But from the beginning of creation, ̳God made them male and female.‘

̳Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become
one flesh.‘ So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man
separate.‖-Mk. 10:2-9

In the early days of Christ‘s ministry, John the Baptist compared his role to that of the best man60 whose
role is to assist the bridegroom [Jesus] in his ministry. John the Baptist serves as the link of the Old
Testament prophetic era to the New Testament‘s arrival of the Messiah. Therefore, ―in light of the OT
background where Israel is depicted as ̳the bride of Yahweh,‘ the Baptist is suggesting that Jesus is
Israel‘s awaited king and Messiah.‖61 John the Baptist‘s role comes into focus as the ―bridegroom‘s
friend‖ who assists him in the completion of the wedding. Grant Osborne explains:

―To oversee most of the wedding details and lead the procession that brought the bride to the groom‘s
home for the ceremony. While the groom was the focus, the best man was ―simply glad to stand with
him.‖ Behind this is also the imagery of Israel as the bride of

57 Mt. 5:17. 58 Douglas J. Moo, “Jesus and the authority of the Mosaic Law” Journal For The Study Of The New Testament vol.
20, (1984):28.

59 Rom. 8:22. 60 Jn. 3:27-30. 61 Andreas J. Köstenberger, “John,” in Commentary on the New Testament Use of the Old
Testament. ed. G. K. Beale and D. A. Carson (Grand Rapids: Baker, 2007), 437.

17

Yahweh (Isa 62:4–5; Hos 2:16–20) and the Church as the bride of Christ (Eph 5:25–27; Rev 21:2, 9).
John the Baptist had handed God‘s people over to the Messiah and was thrilled to do so.‖62

At the heart of Christ‘s ministry, Jesus likened his mission to that of a bridegroom and the disciples the
wedding guests.63 Jesus‘ analogy concerning the wedding guests supports the metaphor from John the
Baptist who recognizes himself as the ―best man‖ and Jesus the groom.64 Bower and Knapp adds that
―Christ in love gives himself to establish a covenant relationship with his one bride. Christ‘s atonement
is seen as a betrothal gift. Christ‘s love cleanses and makes the bride worthy of him.‖65

The very first miracle that was performed by Jesus in John 2:1-11 where he changed water into wine at
the wedding in Cana presents a depiction of God marrying humanity. The miracle that took place in the
wedding is a ―crucial event in the story of the restoration of Israel because it is a dramatization of God
uniting with humanity.‖66 In reviewing the aforementioned Gospel of John, the plot is presented ―When
the wine ran short, the mother of Jesus said to him, ̳They have no wine.‘‖67 Wine in the Israelite tradition
is an important part of the wedding feast and its absence in the festivities would have social
consequences. ―Now there were six stone water jars there for Jewish ceremonial washings, each holding
twenty to thirty gallons. Jesus told them, ̳Fill the jars with water.‘ So they filled them to the brim. Then he
told them, ̳Draw some out now and take it to the headwaiter.‘ So they took it.‖68 Jesus chooses to fill the
jars used for purification to reveal how he values the host‘s honor and dignity.69 The water placed in the
purification jars illustrate the tradition and prophets of the Old Testament and the transformation of the
water into wine is Jesus‘ revelation, a transformation of the old in the new.70

Since the Old Testament contained instances wherein water was used to display the power of Yahweh,71
it is no coincidence that water was again used to demonstrate Jesus‘ first miracle. When Jesus proclaimed
at the last supper that the bread shared in the meal is to be his body and the wine to be his blood, 72 the
wine transformed from ordinary to the wine of salvation. This change echoes the transformation of the
water into wine at the feast of Cana and mirrors the transformation of the water into blood at the time of
Moses. With the transformation of water to wine to blood, Jesus lays out the master plan of God wherein
Jesus being the true bridegroom brings forth the wine of redemption for the coming wedding: the true
marriage between God and humanity.

Jesus used the metaphor of marriage in the parable of the bridesmaids wherein the wise bridesmaids bring
extra oil for their lamps to help them wait for the coming of the bridegroom73. In

62 Grant R. Osborne, “The Gospel of John,” in Cornerstone Biblical Commentary. ed. Philip W. Comfort and Carol Stream. (IL:
Tyndale, 2007), 61.

63 Mt. 9:15-16; Mk. 2:19-20. 64 Jn. 3:29 65 R.K. Bower and G.L. Knapp, ‘Marriage’ in G.W. Bromiley (Gen Ed) The
International Standard Bible Encyclopaedia (Grand Rapids: Eerdmans, vol. 3, 1986), 265

66 Rachel M. McGill, “God’s Getting Married: The Wedding at Cana as a Dramatization of Covenantal Fulfilment.” The Hilltop
Review 8 no.1 (2015):56

67 Jn. 2:3. 68 Jn. 2:6-8. 69 Craig S. Keener, The Gospel of John: A Commentary. Vol. 1.(Peabody: Hendrickson Publishers,
2003), 500. 70 Rudolf Schnackenburg,. The Gospel According to St. John. Vol. 1. (New York: Seabury Press, 1980), 333;
Schnackenburg refers wine as a symbol of eschatological fulfilment.

71 Gen. 7:6-8:5; Job 5:10, 12:15; Ex. 14:21, 27; Josh. 3:15-16. 72 Mt. 26:28; Mk. 14:24; Lk. 22:20. 73 Mt. 25:1-13. 18

another instance, Jesus insinuates the he is the bridegroom. In Luke, Jesus answered the accusations of the
Pharisees regarding the question why the apostles were not fasting:

“They said to him, ―John‘s disciples often fast and pray, and so do the disciples of the Pharisees, but
yours go on eating and drinking.‖ Jesus answered, ―Can you make the friends of the bridegroom fast
while he is with them? But the time will come when the bridegroom will be taken from them; in those
days they will fast.‖74

While fasting is directed toward the preparation and strengthening of the spirit, with Jesus in the midst of
the apostles, there is no longer a need to fast for they are already with God.

This use of marital image in the Gospels is significant, because God‘s revelation is a person in Jesus
Christ who like the bridegroom longs to enter into a relationship with mankind and such God‘s revelation
draws man to know Jesus in that unique marital bond wherein he forms a supernatural, bridal relationship
with humanity.

II. Marriage in St. Paul’s Teaching

The apostle Paul portrays marriage in the same light as the Gospels where he presents Jesus as the
bridegroom and humanity the bride. He teaches that like Christ, husbands have to share the same love and
affection to their wives: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up
for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to
himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless.‖75

David Williams explains that the washing by water is an allusion to the purification of the individual in
the Sacrament of Baptism which, in turn is a symbolic precursor to a union with Christ.76 In his
correspondences with the Church in Corinth, Paul once again uses marriage as an allegory to the union of
Christ and the Church wherein he presented his role to the Corinthians as either a father to the bride or a
friend of the bride whose duty is to present to the Corinthian faithful ―in marriage to one husband—to
present a pure virgin to Christ.‖77 Philip Hughes, explains the presentation of Paul as father of the bride:

―And as it is the father‘s right to give his daughter in marriage to an approved bridegroom, so he, their
spiritual father, had given them in betrothal to one husband, a Divine Husband. The betrothal of a maiden
implies purity and faithfulness; she is committed to the one man to whom she is engaged to be
married.‖78

Meanwhile, Alfred Edersheim gravitates toward the role of Paul as a friend of the bride rather than the
bride‘s father since it is more in tune with the Jewish practice in the New Testament times. He states:

―In Judea there were at every marriage two groomsmen or ―friends of the bridegroom‖— one for the
bridegroom, the other for his bride. Before marriage, they acted as a kind of intermediaries between the
couple; at the wedding they offered gifts, waited upon the bride and bridegroom, and attended them to the
bridal chamber, being also, as it were, the

74 Lk. 5:33-35. 75 Eph. 5:25-27. 76 David J. William, Paul’s Metaphors: Their Context and Character. (Hendrickson Publishers,
2004), 54-55. 77 I Cor. 11:2. 78 Philip E. Hughes, The Second Epistle to the Corinthians. (NICOT; Grand Rapids: Eerdmans,
1962), 374.

19

guarantors of the bride‘s virgin chastity. . . . he speaks, as it were, in the character of groomsman or
―bridegroom‘s friend,‖ who had acted as such at the spiritual union of Christ with the Corinthian Church.
And we know that it was specially the duty of the ̳friend of the bridegroom‖ so to present to him his
bride.‖79

Here, one can see how Paul views himself as a friend who won the Corinthian believers to Christ and
betrothed them to Him and is duty bound to present them as ―a pure virgin‖ to the groom.

In the letters to the Ephesians, the marriage metaphor once again surfaces, alluding the relationship of
Christ with the Church.80 The husband is advised to act as the head of the wife likened to Christ as head
of the Church, though this seeming rule of one over another is not a connotation of leadership but rather
of advocacy where the head guides the body for the benefit of all. This unity between husband and wife
results in the children being nurtured in an environment of security and self- sacrificing love which flows
out and touches all.

B. THEOLOGICAL PERSPECTIVE OF MARRIAGE

I. St. Augustine: Proles, Fides, Sacramentum

Augustine, the bishop of Hippo in Africa, lived from 354 to 430 AD. Before becoming a well- known
doctor of the Church, he was once a Manichean who believed that the body was created by evil and
therefore also evil, though it holds a certain amount of goodness.81 After he converted to the Catholic
Faith and his eventual election as the Bishop of Hippo, he wrote several treatises on marriage wherein he
defines the good of marriage namely: fides, proles, and sacramentum—fidelity, procreation, and
sacrament. Fidelity refers to a man or woman remaining loyal and exclusive to their spouses; Procreation
refers to the introduction of children into the world where they are nurtured and educated in the Faith; and
Sacrament refers to the indissolubility of the union of spouses. These elements remain the basis of the
Church‘s teachings on marriage until the present time.82

Fides

Fides or fidelity is the good of marriage whereby the couple remains faithful to each other as well as offer
mutual service to each other. Augustine wrote: ―Furthermore, in performing their duty to each other,
even if this is claimed somewhat excessively and without restraint, husband and wife have a duty of
fidelity to each other.‖83

John Noonan believes that for Augustine, fides weighs heavier than proles which Augustine derives from
the writings of the apostle Paul where the Paul teaches that the couple should assist each other and
recognize that their bodies no longer belong to themselves but rather, to their spouses.84 The

79 Alfred Edersheim,. Sketches of Jewish Social Life in the Time of Christ. (Walking Lion Press, 2006), 153. 80 Eph. 5:21-33.
81 Garry Wills, Saint Augustine (New York: Penguin), 27-30; Noonan, John T. Jr. 1986. Contraception: A History of Its
Treatment by the Catholic Theologians and Canonists. (Cambridge: Belknap Press), 107-111. It was also stated that since the
body was evil, procreation was an evil act as it produced more evil into the world (pg. 111).

82 Fr. John J. Edersheim, O.F.M., Marriage and Mulieris Dignitatem. Ave Maria Law Review 8, no. 349 (2010): 356. 83 John T.
Noonan, Jr., Contraception: A History of Its Treatment by the Catholic Theologians and Canonists. (Belknap Press of Harvard
University Press, 1986), 127.

84 Ibid., 129. 20

acknowledgement that in marriage, one‘s body no longer belongs to one‘s self but rather belongs to the
spouse is to acknowledge surrendering one‘s self to another. This surrendering of self to each other gives
a sense of authority to the other that requires mutual trust and becomes the basis of fides. Though there
can be a danger of abuse of this authority, the couple then strives to achieve such fidelity and trust that
neither individual would want to abuse or cause harm. Karol Wojtyla, adds, that the couple must make a
―gift of self‖85 in the marriage: ―It is not enough for a woman and a man to give themselves to each
other in marriage. If each of these persons is simultaneously the property of the Creator, He also must
give the man to the woman and the woman to the man, or at any rate approve of the reciprocal gift of self
implicit in the institution of marriage‖86

Proles

Even though fides weighs heavier than proles, Agustine notes that proles, or procreation is the first and
foremost good of marriage because it necessitates the continuation of humanity: ―We can say now that
in that condition of being born and dying with which we are acquainted and in which we were created, the
union of man and woman is something of value.‖87

Augustine arrives at this conclusion not just for the continuation of the humanity but rather of the
propagation of Christianity itself.88 The importance of procreation in marriage is further explained by
Wojtyla and holds that procreation is the ―primary purpose of intercourse.‖89 Wojtyla‘s explanation of
the connection of marriage and parenthood reveals matrimony coming from the word matrimonuim which
highlights to role of motherhood and give precedence to matrimony preparing the couple for the duties of
parenthood90. These support the earlier analogy of Roland Teske when he mentioned that ―matrimony
was, of course so named because a woman ought to marry to become a mother91.‖ Wojtyla continues by
emphasizing that ―the birth of a child turns the union of man and woman based on the sexual
relationship into a family.‖92

In proles, Augustine cautions that since procreation is a vital good of marriage, couples should only
engage in intercourse for the sole purpose of procreation and if done outside this condition would result in
venial sin. Wojtyla lessens the impact of this impression of Augustine and says that instead of an explicit
desire for having a child, the couple must be ready for the possibility of parenthood:

―To say that intercourse is permissible and justified only on condition that the partners hope to have a
child as a result of it would be an exaggeratedly strict ethical position. It would be at odds with the order
of nature, which characteristically leaves the connection between the sexual act and reproduction in
particular marriages a matter of some uncertainty.‖93

85 Adrian J. Reimers, Truth About the Good: Moral Norms in the Thought of John Paul II. (Ave Maria: Sapientia Press, 2011),
219.

86 Karol Wojtyła, 1960. Love and Responsibility. Trans. Willetts, H.T. 1981 (San Francisco: Ignatius, 1993), 224. 87 Augustine,
De Bono Conugiali, 3.3. 88 John T. Noonan, Jr., Contraception: A History of Its Treatment by the Catholic Theologians and
Canonists. (Belknap Press of Harvard University Press, 1986), 127.

89 Karol Wojtyła,. 1960. Love and Responsibility. Willetts, H.T. trans. 1981. (San Francisco: Ignatius, 1993), 226. 90 Ibid. 91
Roland Teske, S.J., The Works of St. Augustine, A Translation for the 21st Century: Answer to Faustus, a Manichean. (Hyde
Park, New York: New City Press, 2007), 257.

92 Ibid., 217. 93 Karol Wojtyła, 1960. Love and Responsibility. Willetts, H.T. trans. 1981. (San Francisco: Ignatius, 1993), 233.
21

Albeit the recognition of proles as an important good in the married relationship, Augustine also
recognizes that while the relationship must be open to children, a marriage cannot become invalid if the
couple remains childless: ―The marriage bond remains, even if because of evident infertility no children
result, despite the fact that this was the reason for entering into the marriage.‖94

While procreation may be an important good of marriage, it is not the only good of marriage and if the
couple cannot bear any child it is not an excuse to sever the marriage. Wojtyla complements this and
continues stating that even though a child would make the marriage ―fuller‖ and leads the members to
become a family, a marriage without a child does not lose its character and retains its full value as an
institution.95

Sacramentum

Sacramentum asserts the indissolubility of marriage as well as the monogamous reality of the married
relationship. Augustine further explains that ―entering into the marriage contract is a matter of such
sacredness that it is not annulled by that separation.‖ 96

Augustine affirms marriage as something which is so sacred that it cannot be dissolved even by physical
separation in as much as even if the couple no longer live together. The marriage still binds them so much
that a second marriage would be considered adulterous.97 The Catechism of the Catholic Church defines
sacramentum as a ―visible sign of a hidden reality‖ wherein it connects to marriage seamlessly. Jeremy
Bergstrom believes that Augustine sees the sacrament of marriage as a ―spiritual reality that is beyond it,
and in which it participates.‖98 This spiritual reality is revealed to the couple through the sacramentality
of marriage where the couple is given a visible reminder of the union of Christ with His Church.

Bergstrom continues by saying that Augustine sees sacramentum not as the result of fides and proles but
rather the redemption of fides and proles: ―So it is that the sacramentum of marriage reminds us, through
its signification of Christ united to the Church, to order rightly our marital fides, or faithful friendship
toward the good of mutually obtaining Christ with one‘s spouse‖

II. St. Thomas Aquinas: The Ends of Marriage

Marriage has always been an area wherein challenges and opportunities arise due to its nature as a
sacrament. Italian Dominican Doctor of the Church, Thomas Aquinas has greatly contributed to the
deeper understanding of marriage and its sacramentality. Rev. Fr. James P. Lyons accentuates Aquinas‘
contributions in the study of marriage stating:

―Saint Thomas and his school have perhaps done more than any other theologians to clarify the structure
of marriage and to indicate its place in the divine order of things...

94 Augustine, De Bono Conugiali, 15.17. 95 Karol Wojtyła, 1960. Love and Responsibility. Willetts, H.T. trans. 1981. (San
Francisco: Ignatius, 1993), 218. 96 Augustine, De Bono Conugiali, 7.6. 97 Carol Harrison, Augustine: Christian Truth and
Fractured Humanity. (Oxford: Oxford University Press, 2006), 168.

98 Jeremy W. Bergstrom, The Great Sacrament of Augustinian Marriage: Furthering our Discussion over the TFSM. (The
Episcopal Diocese of Dallas, 2015), 6.

22

But beyond this, Thomism has a special value in a study of marriage, and especially in a study of the
philosophical note of the essential structure of marriage. For Thomism is, par excellence, [quoting Gilson]

̳the theology of the natural‘‖99

Aquinas usually treats the sacraments systematically where he identified the matter, form, minister and
effect of each sacrament. Meanwhile, Aquinas slightly deviates from this approach in his discussion of
marriage where he presents marriage according to the three goods mentioned by Augustine namely,
proles, fides, and sacramentum. Through these distinctions, Aquinas was able to present the potential and
limitations of marriage at the natural and spiritual level. With the approach to marriage according to
essence, cause and effect, Aquinas mirrors Augustine where in essence, he states, is the union or
conjoining of a man and woman100 [sacramentum], the cause is the consent of the spouses101 [fides],
and the effect is the child [proles]102

―Thus, therefore, matrimony has three goods. The first is that it is a function of nature in the sense that it
is ordered to the production and education of offspring; and this good is the good of offspring. The second
good is that it is a remedy for desire, which is restricted to a definite person; and this good is called
fidelity, which a man preserves toward his wife, by not going to another woman, and similarly the wife
toward the husband. The third good is called the sacrament, inasmuch as it signifies the union of Christ
and the Church, as it says in Ephesians (5:32): ―This mystery [sacrament] is a profound one, and I am
saying that it refers to Christ and the Church.‖‖103
Though it may seem that Aquinas would merely echo the teachings of Augustine with regard to marriage,
Aquinas would order these goods into a more systematic and compressed idea. With his belief that every
being is ordained toward God and participates in his ultimate goodness, Aquinas presents a different
perspective on marriage emphasizing its ends.

In Summa Contra Gentiles, Aquinas elaborates how God places order in creation and within each
creature. Each order of being follows a certain end which, in turn is directed to God. It is in this premise
that man was endowed with the ultimate order to seek and achieve a certain level of happiness that leads
him toward God, his absolute end. Aquinas believes that since man is a rational creature, he can identify
things that can make him happy and thus, pursue them, seeing them as ―ends and goods.‖ The difference
however, in ends and goods according to Aquinas, relies on the ―will‖ naturally siding with the aspect of
the good. Though some goods are constitutive of human nature and thus, merely seen as objective goods
e.g., seeking friendship, ―ends‘ are actions that are chosen as the objects of the actions. With this search
for ends and goods present in man, Aquinas believes that it cascades to marriage, giving it a certain
rational order, as a person is naturally inclined to choose certain ends, like procreation which in turn
fosters the preservation of humanity.

99 James P. Lyons, The Essential Structure of Marriage: A Study of the Thomistic Teaching on the Natural Institution (Catholic
University of America Press, Washington D.C., 1950).

100 In IV Sent., D. 27, q. 1, a. 1, qc. 1 and 2. Cf. also Summa Contra Gentiles, lib. IV, cap. 78, paragraph 2. 101 In IV Sent., D.
27, q. 1, art. 2. 102 In IV Sent., D. 27, q. 1, a. 1, qc 2. 103 Super I Epistolam B. Pauli ad Corinthios lectura Commentary, On the
First Epistle to the Corinthians, Saint Thomas Aquinas, 318. Translated by Fabian Larcher, O.P. Html-edited by Joseph Kenny,
O.P. http://dhspriory.org/thomas/SS1Cor.htm#71 Thomas, Daniel A. Keating, and Fabian R. Larcher. Commentary on
Colossians.(Naples, Fla: Sapientia Press, 2006).

23

The Procreative End: The Good of the Offspring

For Thomas Aquinas, the good of marriage namely, proles does not merely pertain to the continuation of
the species but rather, a more meaningful one or as he would call bonum prolis: the education of children:
―First, as concerns its principal end, which is the good of offspring: for nature does not intend only their
generation, but their upbringing, and their advancement to the perfect state of man as man, which is the
state of virtue.‖104

For Aquinas, the upbringing of the child forms the core of the married relationship and ensures the
fidelity and indissolubility of marriage on a natural level. It requires adults to guide and nurture their
children until they reach maturity which in turn obliges the adults to stay to help each other in the shared
task of raising their children. This upbringing of the child goes beyond the biological dimension of
marriage. Aquinas presents this when he cited the marriage of Mary and Joseph wherein the two were
united for life for the sake of raising Jesus.105 Though there was no consummation present in their
relationship, Mary and Joseph remained husband and wife not only as a formality but as an actual reality
which shaped the developmental years of Jesus.

Aquinas was not merely looking at proles on the scale of societal benefits like increased birth rates for the
welfare of society but more of a common good wherein it is a collection of goods. To simply put it, for
Aquinas, the aim of proles is not for the sake of producing children but rather for the sake of producing
adults who do not only add to the continuation of humanity but the building of the Body of Christ. The
more adults who are raised in virtue, the more a community becomes the Body of Christ: ―A child is not
called the good of marriage only because he is generated through marriage, but also inasmuch as he is
accepted and educated in marriage; and thus, the good of this marriage was a child, but not in the first
way‖106

―marriage was chiefly instituted for the good of offspring, not only their generation, since this can
happen without marriage, but also their upbringing to the perfect state: since everything naturally intends
its effect to arrive at its perfect state. But in children a two- fold perfection must be considered: first, the
perfection of nature not only as to the body, but also the soul, through those things which are of natural
law; second, the perfection of grace.‖ 107

The Unitive End: Shared fate and fortune

According to Aquinas, ―marriage does not only occur among men for the procreation and nurturing of
children but also for the consortium of a shared life for the sake of sharing the labors.‖108 With the idea
of ―shared life‖ in mind, Aquinas presents that the second end of marriage supports the first end wherein
the parents seek to store up treasures for their children who are their ―common good‖:

―marriage by the intention of nature is ordered to the education of children, not only for a certain time,
but for the entire life of the children. For which reason it is from natural law that parents store up treasure
for their children, and children are the heirs of their parents. Therefore, since children are a common good
of the husband and wife, it is necessary for

104 In IV Sent., D. 26, Q. 1, Art. 1. 105 In IV Sent., D. 30, Q. 2, art. 2, ad 4. 106 Ibid. 107 In IV Sent., D. 39, Q. 2, art. 2, ad 4
108 In IV Sent. D. 31, Q. 1, Art. 2, obj 1.

24

their association to remain undivided forever according to the dictates of the law of nature.‖109

By using the phrase ―common good‖, Aquinas emphasizes the cooperation of the couple in rearing the
child and how it endures in their lifetime. Beth Mortensen elaborates this analogy of Aquinas by saying:

―As the common good of his parents, the child is equally the good of both: he comes from both equally
and grows under their shared attention. If the parents‘ shared life is one of virtue, the child‘s inheritance
will be his education in virtue. This working together to bestow on the child the legacy of a life lived
well, shows us how the unitive and procreative ends of marriage are more deeply interwoven than
distinct.‖110

III. Marriage in the teachings of the Second Vatican Council

Before, marriage was viewed, interpreted and taught by theologians, priests and religious in a manner that
lacks the participation of married couples and thus, would seem separated from the reality of everyday
married life. In the teachings of the Second Vatican Council, the Church sought to remedy this situation
by grounding marriage and nourishing it through the insights of committed married couples. This can be
seen in the actions of Blessed Paul VI when he appointed married individuals and couples to help him
formulate Humanae Vitae. For him, he recognized the need of the Church to acknowledge the experiences
and insights of people who live in the reality of marriage and family, and witness everyday the values,
difficulties and triumphs of marital life.

As Vatican II stressed the biblical understanding of marriage as a covenant through setting aside the
juridical view and putting into light the personal dimension of conjugal love and life, it also makes way
for the development of the spirituality of marriage as it allows the interpretation of marriage in the life of
faith as an encounter with God through marriage‘s human experience of struggle and triumph.

Reintroducing Marriage as a Covenant

It is known that one of the considered achievements of the Second Vatican Council is in the introduction
of new reflections on marriage as a covenant. Vatican II in the Pastoral Constitution on the Church and
the Modern world (Gaudium et Spes) specifically nos. 48-52, sought to root marriage in sacred agreement
and covenantal relationship:

―For as God of old made Himself present to His people through a covenant of love and fidelity, so now
the Saviour of men and the Spouse of the Church comes into with them thereafter so that just as He loved
the Church and handed Himself over on her behalf, the spouses may love each other with perpetual
fidelity through mutual self-bestowal. Authentic married love is caught up into divine love and is
governed and enriched by Christ‘s redeeming power and the saving activity of the Church, so that this
love may lead the spouses to God with powerful effect and may aid and strengthen them in sublime office
of being a father or a mother. For this reason Christian spouses have a special

109 In IV Sent. D. 33, Q. 2, Art. 1. 110 Beth M. Mortensen, The Relation of the Juridical and Sacramental in Matrimony
according to Thomas Aquinas. (Fribourg, Switzerland, Fribourg University, 2012), 28.

25

sacrament by which they are fortified and receive a kind of consecration in the duties and dignity of their
state.‖ -GS no. 48

The Dogmatic Constitution on the Church Lumen Gentium also adds to the covenantal nature of marriage
when it stated that ―Christian spouses, in virtue of the sacrament of matrimony... signify and partake of
the mystery of that unity and fruitful love which exists between Christ and his Church.‖111 The
Perspective of the covenant though is no longer a new topic was still not properly given exposure
throughout the centuries since society tended to focus more on the legalistic aspect of marriage rather
than the covenantal relationship that occurs between the husband and wife. Vatican II reintroduced this
dimension of marriage as well as putting emphasis on the personal character of married life when it stated
that ―the intimate partnership of married life and love has been established by the Creator and qualified
by His laws, and is rooted in the conjugal covenant of irrevocable personal consent.‖112

Reintroducing Marriage and its Spirituality

The Catechism of the Catholic Church defines sacraments as ―sign and instruments.‖113 This definition
is lifted from the teachings of Lumen Gentium no. 1 which states that ―the Church is in Christ like a
sacrament or as a sign and instrument both of a very close knit union with God and of the unity of the
whole human race.‖ Through this, marriage can be seen as a participation of the spouses in the
relationship with God which acts like an echo of the Trinitarian relationship as well as Yahweh‘s
relationship with humanity. Besides this relationship with God, marriage connects the couples in a
binding relationship and through this relationship realized within the sacrament of marriage, it creates a
powerful and efficacious sign of the real presence of God. To simply put it, the conjugal love that is
shared by the couple manifests God‘s real presence in their marriage. The Synod of Bishops‘ Lineamenta
explains this:
―In the Incarnation, he [Christ] assumes human love, purifies it and brings it to fulfillment and gives to
the spouses, with his Spirit, the capacity to live that love, permeating every part of their lives of faith,
hope and charity. In this way, the bride and groom are, so to speak, consecrated and, through his grace,
they build up the Body of Christ and are a domestic church (cf. Lumen Gentium, 11), so that the Church,
in order fully to understand her mystery, looks to the Christian family, which manifests her in a real way‖
(Instrumentum Laboris, 4).‖-Lineamenta, 16

Part of the conjugal love shared by the couple is sexuality and sexual intimacy. Throughout the centuries,
the intimate union of the husband and wife has been construed only as a physical requirement in
marriage. By allowing a positive valuation of sexuality and sexual intimacy, Vatican II shifts the focus on
the relationships that take place in marriage: Between husband and wife, between the couple and God.
Vatican II asserts:

―Where the intimacy of married life is broken off, its faithfulness can sometimes be imperilled and its
quality of fruitfulness ruined, for then the upbringing of the children and the courage to accept new one
are both endangered, ... The sexual characteristics of

111 Documents of the Second Vatican Council, Dogmatic Constitution on the Church: Lumen Gentium (hereunto referred as
LG). (Pauline Books & Media, 1965) no. 11.

112 Documents of the Second Vatican Council, Pastoral Constitution of the Church in the Modern World: Gaudium et Spes
(hereunto referred as GS), no. 48.

113 CCC, no. 774. 26

man and the human faculty of reproduction wonderfully exceed the dispositions of lower forms of life.‖ –
GS, 51

Martin Linter describes this creative collaboration of the couple and God when he said: ―In conceiving a
child there is always a surplus, an excess of creative power that exceeds human capacity. It is a
manifestation how persons participate in God‘s creative force and – at the same time – how God uses
human action to be effectively present in the world. Every single human being can be seen as an
expression of a fundamental affirmation, as fruit of a primary love, even if the act of conceiving itself
may not always be such an expression of mutual love between the sexual partners or of their desire to
have a child.‖114

No longer is sexuality seen as something to be regulated but rather as a gift from God for the husband and
wife to appreciate. Gaudium et Spes believes that the sexual relationship of the spouses is also an avenue
wherein God is found. The sexual surrender and exclusivity of the couple to each other manifest God‘s
influence in their married life:

―The actions within marriage by which the couple are united intimately and chastely are noble and
worthy ones. Expressed in a manner which is truly human, these actions promote that mutual self-giving
by which spouses enrich each other with a joyful and a ready will. Sealed by mutual faithfulness and
hallowed above all by Christ's sacrament, this love remains steadfastly true in body and in mind, in bright
days or dark. It will never be profaned by adultery or divorce. Firmly established by the Lord, the unity of
marriage will radiate from the equal personal dignity of wife and husband, a dignity acknowledged by
mutual and total love. The constant fulfillment of the duties of this Christian vocation demands notable
virtue. For this reason, strengthened by grace for holiness of life, the couple will painstakingly cultivate
and pray for steadiness of love, large heartedness and the spirit of sacrifice.‖ –GS, 49
The sexual desire of the couple for each other permeates the longing to love and to be accepted and
through the fruition of this desire, the couple finds that they are in turn loved and accepted by God. They
also come to realize that this desire also gives fulfilment in being able to satisfy their spouse and grant
pleasure as a gift to their spouse. With this vision of the intimate relationship that exists in marriage, the
Church recognizes marital life as an effective sign and instrument of God wherein His love and grace is
present and experienced both in the relationship between husband and wife and in their role of conceiving
and raising a child.

AMORIS LAETITIA

Amoris Laetitia, or ―The Joy of Love‖ is the apostolic exhortation of Pope Francis on the ―Synods of
the Family‖ that met in the falls of 2014 and 2015. The document relays the great expectations and
concerns of the future of the family in the Catholic Church as presented by the pope‘s reflections on the
said synods. With the words: ―The joy of love experienced by families is also the joy of the Church‖115
Francis recognizes that marriage is still at the very heart of the Church in the modern world and that the
challenges faced by marriage and the family must be addressed in the light of the faith:

114 Martin M. Lintner, The Spirituality of Marriage after the Second Vatican Council. Melita Theologica 65 (2015):107.

115 Francis, Amoris Laetitia:the Joy of Love: Post-Synodal Apostolic Exhortation of Pope Francis (hereunto referred as AL).
(Canadian Conference of Catholic Bishops, CCCB, 2016) no. 1.

27

―The Synod process allowed for an examination of the situation of families in today‘s world, and thus
for a broader vision and a renewed awareness of the importance of marriage and the family. The
complexity of the issues that arose revealed the need for continued open discussion of a number of
doctrinal, moral, spiritual, and pastoral questions.‖-AL, 2

The exhortation starts gradually and then builds to a crescendo in chapters 4 and 5 wherein Francis notes
as the central part of the document is concerning love. Chapters 1 to 3 lay the foundation of preparing for
the discussion of love.116 Here, Francis, extols the love of the couple: ―The couple that loves and begets
life is a true, living icon – not an idol like those of stone or gold prohibited by the Decalogue – capable of
revealing God the Creator and Saviour. For this reason, fruitful love becomes a symbol of God‘s Inner
life.‖ –AL, 11

Through this discussion of love, the joy of family life and experience of God allows the love of the couple
for each other to become prevalent and that even though the family faces many difficult challenges and
hurdles, the family continues to give witness to unconditional love and sacrifice:

―I thank God that many families, which are far from considering themselves perfect, live in love, fulfil
their calling and keep moving forward, even if they fall many times along the way. The Synod‘s
reflections show us that there is no stereo-type of the ideal family, but rather a challenging mosaic made
up of many different realities, with all their joys, hopes and problems.‖-AL, 57

The central chapters share a beautiful exposition of love in all of its forms. Chapter 4 presents the many
faces of love as lifted from the Letter of St. Paul to the Corinthians117. Chapter 5 then shifts the focus on
the procreative dimension of the married life and the role of the couple in the family. After the first five
chapters, the document shifts to pastoral concerns and encourages ―a responsible personal and pastoral
discernment of particular cases.‖118 The document goes on to say:
―Our teaching on marriage and the family cannot fail to be inspired and transformed by this message of
love and tenderness; otherwise, it becomes nothing more than the defence of a dry and lifeless doctrine.‖ –
AL, 59 ―But I sincerely believe that Jesus wants a Church attentive to the goodness which the Holy
Spirit sows in the midst of human weakness, a Mother who, while clearly expressing her objective
teaching, ―always does what good she can, even if in the process, her shoes get soiled by the mud of the
street.‖ –AL, 308

Throughout the document, Francis recognizes the ―complexity of the contemporary family‖119 with the
analysis of the current conditions affecting the family and at the same time stressing that there is no single
response that would prove to be the only solution. He argues that the Church has not always been
supported by family due to being content to ―simply decrying present-day evils‖120 and seeking ―to
impose rules by sheer authority‖121. But despite the reality of the current relationship that the Church and

116 Chapter one presents the Scriptures, Chapter two shows the experiences of the modern family, and Chapter three lays the
doctrine. This approach of Francis gives way to the three pillared groundwork for marriage and family rooted in the Word of
God, the world today and Church doctrine.

117 I Cor. 13:4-7. 118 AL, 300 119 Ibid., 2 120 Ibid., 35 121 Ibid., 6 28

the family face, Francis still finds it as a real ground for hope and truth to which the Church must
proclaim. He drives home the point when he said:

―The word of God tells us that ―the one who hates his brother is in the darkness, and walks in the
darkness‖ (1 Jn 2:11); such a person ―abides in death‖ (1 Jn 3:14) and ―does not know God‖ (1 Jn 4:8).
My predecessor Benedict XVI pointed out that ―closing our eyes to our neighbour also blinds us to
God‖, and that, in the end, love is the only light which can ―constantly illuminate a world grown dim‖. If
only we ―love one another, God abides in us and his love is perfected in us‖ (1 Jn 4:12). Since ―the
human person has an inherent social dimension‖, and ―the first and basic expression of that social
dimension of the person is the married couple and the family‖, spirituality becomes incarnate in the
communion of the family. Hence, those who have deep spiritual aspirations should not feel that the family
detracts from their growth in the life of the Spirit, but rather see it as a path which the Lord is using to
lead them to the heights of mystical union.‖ –AL, 316

The document continues on with themes on gender equality; the parallel between Trinitarian and familial
communion; the relationship between work, poverty and nature; the deft handling of contraception; erotic
love in married life; celibacy and virginity and spirituality of the family. In chapter 8 of the document, it
challenges the Church to accompany the weak, discern with them and to integrate them into the Church.
Francis teaches that merciful love will heal, deepen and elevate all we do and from there we will see,
know and love as God. ―We cannot forget that ―mercy is not only the working of the Father; it
becomes a criterion for knowing who his true children are. In a word, we are called to show mercy
because mercy was first shown to us‖. –AL, 310

29

BIBLIOGRAPHY
Carroll, Robert Paris. From Chaos to Covenant. 1981.
Edersheim, Alfred. Sketches of Jewish Social Life: in the Time of Christ. Waking Lion Press. 2006.
Gaudium Et Spes. Typis Polyglottis Vaticanis. 1964.
Harrison, Carol. Augustine: Christian Truth and Fractured Humanity. Oxford University Press. 2006.
Henry, Matthew, et al. An Exposition of the Old and New Testament. Haswell, Barrington, and Haswell,
1838.
Isaakson, Abel and Tomkinson, Neil. Marriage and Ministry in the New Temple. A Study with Special
Reference to Mt. 19. 13-12 and 1. Cor. 11. 3-16. (Translated by Neil Tomkinson.). Lund; Ejnar
Munksgaard: Copenhagen, 1965.

St. John Paul II. Familiaris Consortio: the Christian Family in the Modern World. Catholic Truth Society,

1981.

Keller, John D. Jesus‟ Doctrine of Marriage, Divorce, Remarriage. Infinity Publishing. 2014.

Noonan, John T. Contraception: a History of Its Treatment by the Catholic Theologians and Canonists.

Belknap Press of Harvard University Press, 1986.

Solomon, Norman. Historical Dictionary of Judaism. Rowman & Littlefield, 2015.

Second Vatican Council. Dogmatic Constitution on the Church: Lumen Gentium. Pauline Books &

Media, 1965.

Reimers, Adrian J. Truth about the Good: Moral Norms in the Thought of John Paul II. Sapientia Press of

Ave Maria University, 2011.

Rotelle, John E., and Roland J. Teske. The Works of St. Augustine. A Translation for the 21st Century.:
Answer to The Pelegians, IV: To the Monks of Hadrumetum and Provence. New City Press, 1999.
Werblowsky, Raphael Jehudah Zwi., and Geoffrey Bernard Wigoder. The Oxford Dictionary of the
Jewish Religion. Oxford University Press, 1997.

Williams, David John. Paul's Metaphors: Their Context and Character. Hendrickson Publishers, 2004.
The Catechism of the Catholic Church. Paulines Publications Africa, 1992.
30

THE CHRISTIAN DIMENSION OF MARRIAGE

To give a background on the status of marriages in the Philippines, here are some figures in the year 2016
according to Philippine Statistics Authority: (release date 02-26-18)

• Data on marriages presented in this release were obtained from the Certificates of Marriage (Municipal
Form No. 97). They were registered at the Office of the City/Municipal Civil Registrars throughout the
country and forwarded to the Philippine Statistics Authority.

• In a span of 10 years, the reported number of marriages decreased by 14.4 percent from 2007 to 2016.
However, the number of registered marriages showed a generally decreasing trend from 2007 to 2016, but
with speed of decrease varying for figures 2007-2012, 2012-2016 with shifts in level in 2009, 2012 and in
2015.

• Highest number of marriages in CALABARZON: In 2016, Region IV-A recorded the highest number of
registered marriages, which accounted for 13.0 percent of the total marriages. It was followed by National
Capital Region (NCR) (12.7%) and Region III (11.8%) with the rank second and third, respectively.
These regions were consistently in the top three for the past five years. Furthermore, Region V showed
the highest percent change of increase (1.8%) from 2015 to 2016. On the other hand, NCR had the highest
percent change of decrease (13.0%).

• Most number of couples married in April: The top three months with recorded high number of marriages
in 2016 occurred in April (52,587 or 12.5%), February (12.3%) and May (10.8%). But November was the
least liked month for marriage, recording the lowest number of 20,875 marriages or 5 percent.

• Women married younger than men: The median age of the women that got married in 2016 was two
years lower than the median age of their male counterparts. This was consistently observed in the past
three years.

• Most brides married between ages 20-24 years: About one-third of the brides married at age group 20-
24 (139,067 or 33.1%) while grooms at age group 25-29 (149,187 or 35.6%). Meanwhile, marriages
involving teenage brides were four times more than teenage grooms. It was also observed that there were
some marriages involving adolescents under 15 years old.

• Four out of ten marriages contracted through civil rites: There were 1,147 marriages solemnized daily
through different types of ceremony. Of the total marriages in 2016, 41.6 percent were contracted through
civil rites. Others were either officiated in the Roman Catholic Church (37.5%), or performed in Muslim
tradition (1.2%) or tribal ceremony (0.7%) and other religious rites (19.0%). It could be noted that more
brides and grooms aged 25-29 preferred to be solemnized in the Roman Catholic Church than any other
types of marriage ceremony.

• Filipino brides and grooms also marry other nationalities: There were 404,556 marriages (96.4%)
between Filipino grooms and Filipino brides while 15,072 (3.6%) involved foreign nationals. Among
foreign nationals, the highest frequency of intermarriages involved Filipino grooms and Australians (317)
followed by Americans (279), Canadians (162) and Chinese brides (157). On the other hand, the highest
numbers of intermarriages were between Filipino brides and American grooms (3,081). Other foreign
nationals who married Filipino brides were Japanese (1,585), Australian (925), British (862), Korean
(781) and Canadian (769).

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Based on the data presented above, the Philippine Church serves as a modern-day prophet in preserving
and protecting Filipino marriages and families. With its decreasing number of couples who are getting
married and do not believe in the sanctity of marriage, it is every Christian‘s mission to uphold the
message of the Gospel and the teachings of the Church. As one enters into married life, he/she has the
purpose of sharing in the same mission of Christ in building the Kingdom of God and creating a world
full of love, peace and hope. The Catholic Bishops‘ Conference of the Philippines (CBCP) concretizes its
mission by expressing its stance against the House of Representatives‘ Committee on Population and
Family Relations that unanimously approved the proposed legislation entitled an ―Act Instituting
Absolute Divorce in the Philippines.‖

The CBCP‘s Episcopal Commission on Family and Life, chaired by Archbishop Gilbert A. Garcera,
issued a pastoral statement last February 23, 2018 condemning the proposed divorce bill. The pastoral
letter stressed the following:
• That marriage is an ―inviolable social institution‖ – the foundation of the family – which shall be
protected by the state as enshrined in the Constitution.

• ―Children deserve a home where love, faithfulness, and forgiveness reign. In particular, they don‘t
want to see their parents quit because there are difficulties in their relationship.‖

• ―The sight of their parents persevering together will always remain with them especially when they
will have their own families.‖

• Referring to marriage, that ―what God has joined together, no human being must separate.‖

I. MARRIAGE IS A VOCATION

The Second Vatican Council teaches that ―all Christians in whatever state or walk of life are called to
the fullness of Christian life and to the perfection of charity.‖122 Our call, whether to married life, single
blessedness, priesthood or religious life, is a way of exemplifying the universal call to holiness bestowed
on us in the Sacrament of Baptism. As taken from the letter of St. Paul to the Corinthians: ―All those
who are baptized are saints, that is, they have all been raised to the sphere of God‘s holiness.‖123 We
have our unique response to the Lord who draws us back to Him and invites us: ―Come, follow me.‖124

―The vocation to marriage is written in the very nature of man and woman as they came from the hand
of the Creator.‖125 ―God who created man out of love also calls him/her to love the fundamental and
innate vocation of every human being. For man is created in the image and likeness of God who is
himself love. Since God created him man and woman, their mutual love becomes an image of the
absolute and unfailing love with which God loves man.‖126

―Marriage is not a purely human institution despite the many variations it may have undergone through
the centuries in different cultures, social structures, and spiritual attitudes.‖127 ―It is in reality the

122Lumen Gentium 40. 123 1 Corinthians 1:2, 30; 6:11 124 Matthew 4:19 125 Catechism of the Catholic Church 1603. 126 Ibid
1604. 127 Ibid 1603.

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wise and provident institution of God the Creator, whose purpose was to effect in man His loving design.
Husband and wife, through that mutual gift of themselves, which is specific and exclusive to them alone,
develop that union of two persons in which they perfect one another, cooperating with God in the
generation and rearing new lives.‖128

―Marriage is a vocation. It is a response to a specific call to experience conjugal love as an imperfect

sign of the love between Christ and the Church.‖129 As Paul explains in his letter to the Ephesians,
―Christ loved the Church so much that He gave His life for her.‖130 This understanding of love led Him
to embrace an excruciating death on the cross. Marital life certainly shares in the Paschal Mystery of
Christ, which calls for sacrificial love. Man and woman accept each other, as ―they promise a total self-
giving, faithfulness and openness to new life. The couple recognizes these elements as constitutive of
marriage, gifts offered to them by God, and take seriously their mutual commitment, in God‘s name and
in the presence of the Church.‖131

II. CONTRACT
Marriage as a contract is based on an agreement between a man and a woman to become husband and
wife. This permanent union adheres and protects the sanctity of their life-long relationship. As stated in
the Family Code of the Philippines:―Marriage is a special contract of permanent union between a man
and a woman entered into in accordance with law for the establishment of conjugal and family life. It is
the foundation of the family and an inviolable social institution whose nature, consequences, and
incidents are governed by law and not subject to stipulation by the spouses.‖132

Looking at its nature, it ought to be governed by laws and regulations. ―The contract establishes between
the parties a social or domestic relationship, that of husband and wife; the obligations arising from there
do not come from the parties, but are the creations of law.‖133 The contracting parties do not set the terms
of the agreement that established their conjugal and family life nor could they terminate the contract at
will. It is the state that protects marriage and reserves to itself the right to void or render voidable the
contract.

In the Encyclical letter of Pope Pius XI on Christian Marriage Casti Connubii, he highlighted that
―matrimony was not instituted or restored by man but by God; not by man were the laws made to
strengthen and confirm and elevate it but by God, the Author of nature, and by Christ Our Lord by Whom
nature was redeemed, and hence, these laws cannot be subject to any human decrees or to any contrary
pact even of the spouses themselves.‖134

However, the free will of both man and woman plays a pivotal role. Marriage, in the same way, arises
from the free consent of each of the spouses. ―And this free act of the will, by which each party hands
over and accepts those rights proper to the state of marriage. This freedom regards the question whether
the contracting parties really wish to enter upon matrimony or to marry this particular person; but the
nature of matrimony is entirely independent of the free will of man, so that if one has once contracted
matrimony he is thereby subject to its divinely made laws and its essential properties.‖135

128 Humanae Vitae, 8 129 Amoris Laetitia, 72. 130 Ephesians 5:25. 131 Relatio Synodi 2014, 21. 132 Executive No. 209. July 6,
1987. The Family Code of the Philippines. 133 Artemio A. Baluma, 1990. Void and Voidable Marriages in the Family Code and
their parallels in Canon Law. 134 Casti Connubii, 5. 135 Casti Connubii, 6.

33

The matrimonial consent is an indispensable element in the validity of the marriage contract. ―The
Church holds the exchange of consent between the spouses to be indispensable elements that make the
marriage. If consent is lacking there is no marriage.‖136 ―It consists in a human act by which the
partners mutually give themselves to each other: ―I take you to be my wife‖- ―I take you to be my
husband.‖ This consent that binds the spouses to each other finds its fulfillment in two becoming one
flesh.‖137 ―The priest (or deacon) who assists at the celebration of marriage receives the consent of the
spouses in the name of the Church and gives the blessing of the Church. The presence of the Church's
minister (and also of the witnesses) visibly expresses the fact that marriage is an ecclesial reality.‖138

―The marriage bond has been established by God himself in such a way that a marriage concluded and
consummated between baptized persons can never be dissolved. This bond, which results from the free
human act of the spouses and their consummation of the marriage, is a reality, henceforth irrevocable, and
gives rise to a covenant guaranteed by God's fidelity. The Church does not have the power to contravene
this disposition of divine wisdom.‖139

III. COVENANT
―The Holy Scripture affirms that man and woman were created for one another: "It is not good that the
man should be alone." (Gen. 2:18) The woman, "flesh of his flesh," his equal, his nearest in all things, is
given to him by God as a "helpmate"; she thus represents God from whom comes our help. "Therefore a
man leaves his father and his mother and cleaves to his wife, and they become one flesh." (Gen. 2:24) The
Lord himself shows that this signifies an unbreakable union of their two lives by recalling what the plan
of the Creator had been "in the beginning": "So they are no longer two, but one flesh. (Mt. 19:6)"140

In the Jewish tradition, ―covenants are established by making an oath—an oath that creates kinship
between the two who are making the covenant. The Hebrew word for ̳oath‘ is „shevah,‘ meaning ̳to seven
oneself.‘ In Gen 21:27 31, Abraham makes a treaty with Abimelech using seven ewe lambs, and they
called the place „Beersheva,‟ which means, ̳the place of the oath‘ or ̳the well of the sevens.‘ If you do not
have an oath, you don't have a covenant.‖141

The covenant of love between God and His people is an essential part of the Revelation and faith
experience of Israel. God took the initiative to establish that relationship: ―I will be your God, and you
will be my people.‖142 In the course of history, despite the stubbornness of heart of the Israelites, He
endures in His love and remains faithful to His promise of salvation. He established a new covenant by
sending His only begotten Son. ―The communion between God and His people finds its definitive
fulfillment in Jesus Christ, the Bridegroom who loves and gives Himself as the Savior of humanity,
uniting it to Himself as His body.‖143 By means of Baptism, man and woman are definitively set within
the new and eternal covenant, in the spousal covenant of Christ with the Church. ―And it is because of
this indestructible insertion that the intimate community of conjugal life and love, founded by the

136 Catechism of the Catholic Church 1626. 137 Ibid 1627. 138 Ibid 1630. 139 Ibid 1640. 140 Ibid 1605. 141 David Kyle Foster.
Covenant: The Heart of the Marriage Mystery 142 Genesis 17:1 143 Familiaris Consortio, 13.

34

Creator,‖144 is elevated and assumed into the spousal charity of Christ, sustained and enriched by His
redeeming power.

A marriage covenant, therefore, is more than a mere contractual agreement. It is based on the personal
commitment and total giving of oneself to someone whom you‘ve made a pact. This covenantal love is to
be found in man and woman united in marriage which constitutes a special union, a life-long relationship.

IV. CELEBRATION

Marriage is a celebration of love that should be open for all. It is like the wedding Feast of the Lamb
wherein everyone is invited to come for a joyous celebration: ―Blessed are those who are called to the
supper of the Lamb.‖145 Jesus Christ, the Lamb of God, is illustrated as a bridegroom joining himself to
his bride, the Church. The priest at the Mass more clearly echoes this angelic invitation to the heavenly
wedding feast. In a sense, we are receiving a wedding invitation.

―In the Latin Rite the celebration of marriage between two Catholic faithful normally takes place during
Holy Mass, because of the connection of all the sacraments with the Paschal mystery of Christ. In the
Eucharist the memorial of the New Covenant is realized, the New Covenant in which Christ has united
himself for ever to the Church, his beloved bride for whom he gave himself up. It is therefore fitting that
the spouses should seal their consent to give themselves to each other through the offering of their own
lives by uniting it to the offering of Christ for his Church made present in the Eucharistic sacrifice, and by
receiving the Eucharist so that, communicating in the same Body and the same Blood of Christ, they may
form but "one body" in Christ.‖146

Marriage is a public declaration of the couple‘s love-commitment before God and the Church. As the man
and the woman enter into this definitive stage of their married life, the Church requires a set of
ecclesiastical and liturgical form to make certain its validity. The Catechism of the Catholic Church
expounds on why the Church requires that the faithful contract marriage according to ecclesiastical form:

―Sacramental marriage is a liturgical act. It is therefore appropriate that it should be celebrated in the
public liturgy of the Church. Marriage introduces one into an ecclesiastical order, and creates rights and
duties in the Church between spouses towards the children. Since marriage is a state of life in the Church,
certainly it is necessary (hence, the obligation to have witnesses). The public character of the consent
protects the ―I do‖ once given, and helps the spouses to remain faithful to it.‖147

This requires the bride and the groom to express willfully and publicly their matrimonial consent to have
each other before the presence of an officiating priest and witnesses: ―In the Name of God, I take you to
be my wife (husband), to have and to hold from this day forward, for better, for worse, for richer, for
poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish, until we are parted by death. This is my solemn
vow.‖

144 Gadium et Spes, 48. 145 Revelation 19:9. 146 Catechism of the Catholic Church 1621. 147 Ibid.,1631. 35

V. SACRAMENT

―On the threshold of his public life Jesus performs his first sign - at his mother's request - during a
wedding feast. The Church attaches great importance to Jesus' presence at the wedding at Cana. She sees
in it the confirmation of the goodness of marriage and the proclamation that henceforth marriage will be
an efficacious sign of Christ's presence.‖148 He dwells with the married couple, gives them the strength to
take up their crosses and follow him, to rise again after they have fallen, to forgive one another, to bear
one another's burdens, to ̳be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ,‘149 and to love one
another with supernatural, tender, and fruitful love.150 In the joys of their love and family life he gives
them here on earth a foretaste of the wedding feast of the Lamb.

―How can I ever express the happiness of a marriage joined by the Church, strengthened by an offering,
sealed by a blessing, announced by angels, and ratified by the Father? How wonderful the bond between
two believers, now one in hope, one in desire, one in discipline, one in the same service! They are both
children of one Father and servants of the same Master, undivided in spirit and flesh, truly two in one
flesh. Where the flesh is one, one also is the spirit.‖151

Marriage, like the other six ritual sacraments of the Catholic Church, is a sign or symbol that reveals the
Mystery of Jesus Christ and through which His divine life and love are communicated to us human
beings. This arose from the ministry that was instituted by Christ. It was entrusted to the Church to be
celebrated in one Baptism within and for the faithful. God‘s love becomes present to the couple in their
sacramental union. By their permanent, faithful and exclusive giving to each other, the couple unveils the
unconditional love of God. Their married life becomes sacramental to the extent that the couple shares
with God‘s salvific action and serves as living witness of Christ in the ordinary and concrete way.

―The Apostle Paul makes clear when he says: "Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the Church
and gave himself up for her, that he might sanctify her," adding at once: "'For this reason a man shall
leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one. This is a great
mystery, in reference to Christ and the Church."152

―The Church teaches that there are two effects of marriage: the indissoluble marital bond and the grace
of the sacrament proper to the married state of life.‖153 Sacrament effects grace when God shares the
divine life with the husband and wife and gives them the strength to keep on despite its odds and
adversities. The grace also gives help to be lovingly faithful to each other and to be responsible parents to
their children. As Blessed Pope Paul VI states: ―By it [the Sacrament of Matrimony] husband and wife
are strengthened and...consecrated for the faithful accomplishment of their proper duties, for the carrying
out of their proper vocation even to perfection, and the Christian witness which is proper to them before
the whole world.‖154

Suggested activities:

• The class will watch an AVP on marriage in the Philippine context. The students will make a reflection
paper based on the questions below:

1. How do you see the value of marriage in the Philippines?

148 Ibid., 1613. 149 Ephesians 5:21. 150 Catechism of the Catholic Church 1642. 151 Tertullian, Ad uxorem. 2,8,6-7:PL 1,1412-
1413; cf. FC 13. 152 Ibid 1616. 153 Ibid 1638. 154 Humanae Vitae, 25.

36

2. How do Filipinos give regard to the sanctity of marriage amidst moral

issues such as same-sex marriage, divorce and cohabitation? 3. On a personal note,

• The class will be divided into five groups with 8 members each. They will have a discussion/sharing on
the SWOT Analysis: What are the strengths, weaknesses, opportunities and threats of marriage?
Afterwards, the leader will report to the whole class on what transpired in their group sharing.

• My Ideal Mandala of Marriage: 1. The students will draw a circle and divide it into five equal parts. 2.
Each section represents a dimension of marriage. 3. Use symbols to represent the ideal dimension of
marriage:

Vocation, Contract, Covenant, Celebration, and Sacrament. 4. Type their explanation/reflection at the
back of Mandala.

• Infomercial of Marriage in the Philippines: The class will be divided into five groups with 8 members
each. They have to create a 1-3 minute infomercial on marriage in the Philippines.

• Individual Activity: Each student will make ―A Prayer for a Happy Marriage.‖ Put it on a short bond
paper.

• Individual Activity: Each student will make ―A Bottle of Vitamins for a Happy Marriage.‖ Each
capsule contains a Bible verse that serves as guide for married couples.

• Have an Interview from your respective parishes about marriage. Guide questions are as follows:
1. What is the demographic profile of married couples in our parish? 2. What particular
organization/committee caters to the needs of married

couples? What services do they offer? 3. How is our parish‘s programs for married couples?