Lesson 4_ True friendship - Summary Task

True friendship is a kind of divine act that enables two people to share their thoughts
and feelings that life may deny them. Real friendship is an inner feeling, an awareness
known when two people can be together and share thoughts, feelings, experiences,
ideas without evaluations, criticism or judgments, at the risk of exposing their human
vulnerability.
TO GIVE AND RECEIVE
Friendship is not a luxury, it is a spiritual opportunity, not necessarily religious, that
helps us grow in grace and wisdom. It implies loving, sharing, caring and learning to
give and to receive. Caring for each other means that souls connect to create a climate
of reciprocity and concern for each other’s wellness. As we reach out and find a friend
with whom we can interact honestly and warmly; such a relationship will give us a new
and better dimension about ourselves.
When two people do interesting and helpful things for each other, more feelings of
friendship are generated. Unlike acquaintances, friendships are a form of unwritten
contract. Friends usually enter into an unspoken agreement that they will respond
toward each other in generally honest and kind ways. They will be pleased to see each
other; they will support each other when either is threatened; they will be available for
discussions; they will publicly admit their friendship; they will have each other’s best
interests at heart; they will attempt to share each other’s joy and sorrow. Above all, they
will be predictable and loyal with the confines of their friendship. Friends are better than
the stars. The stars in the sky shine only during the night. But true friends shine day and
night by their behavior and response to friendship.
ACCEPTANCE IS KEY
When a friend is different from you in likes and dislikes, goals and aspirations,
personality traits, it’s nice to observe the difference without judgment. You may learn
from frequent contact with that person that good friends agree to disagree. What is of
essence is that there is a real desire to understand each other. Accept your friend with
his/her flaws. It may be that in the course of interaction, your friend’s virtues may
transcend the shortcomings. And it may be foolish to be irritated at a few blemishes,
forgetting our own.
True friends don’t desert each other when one is facing trouble. They would face it
together and support each other, even if it is against the interests of the other person.
Best friends don’t analyze each other; they don’t have to do so. They accept each other
with their positive and negative qualities. Nothing is hidden from true friends. They know
each other’s strengths as well as weaknesses. One would not overpower the other.
They would respect each other’s individuality. In fact, they would understand the
similarities and respect the differences. Best friends are not concerned about any
outsider who criticizes their friendship. At best, they can ignore or walk away from
people who criticize their friendship.
A SPECIAL BOND
Most of us wonder what is the real meaning of the saying “A Friend in Need is a Friend
Indeed”? The trust between best friends is such that if one friend falls in trouble, the
other will not think twice to help. If the bond between two friends is strong, true friends
can endure even long distances. For them, geographical separation is just a part of life.
It would not affect their friendship. They make it a point to stay in touch, even in the
verge of being exhausted due to the drudgery of everyday life. True friendship does not
fade away. In fact, it grows better with time. True friendship thrives on trust, inspiration,
and comfort. Best friends come to know, when the other person is in trouble, merely by
listening to their initial “Hello” over the phone. They can even understand each other’s
silence. What keeps the fabric of friendship solid and colorful is a touch of spirituality.
Friendship cannot become permanent unless it becomes a spiritual experience. It does
not have to be defended or explained. It is only with the heart that we can understand
what it means to be a friend or to have a friend.
Friendship is not a luxury; it is a spiritual opportunity that refines our character. As it
develops, we grow in grace, we learn to love and to care, we learn to give and to
receive. True friendship involves action: doing something good for each other, and
sharing thoughts and feelings without fear of judgment or negative criticism. Trust is
essential to true friendship. We all need someone with whom we can share our lives,
thoughts, feelings, and frustrations. We need to be able to share our deepest secrets
with someone, without worrying that those secrets will end up becoming public
knowledge. True friendship requires certain accountability factors. Real friends
encourage one another and forgive one another where there has been an offense. If we
sometimes offend a friend without meaning to, in a spirit of gentleness, we can
apologize. Saying “I’m sorry that I have hurt your feelings,” paves the way to restore
peace in our friendships.

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True friendship is a kind of divine act that enables two people to share their thoughts

TO GIVE AND RECEIVE

Friendship is not a luxury, it is a spiritual opportunity, not necessarily religious, that

and better dimension about ourselves.

friendship are generated. Unlike acquaintances, friendships are a form of unwritten

night by their behavior and response to friendship.

transcend the shortcomings. And it may be foolish to be irritated at a few blemishes,

forgetting our own.

people who criticize their friendship.

Friendship cannot become permanent unless it becomes a spiritual experience. It does

what it means to be a friend or to have a friend.

Friendship is not a luxury; it is a spiritual opportunity that refines our character. As it

knowledge. True friendship requires certain accountability factors. Real friends

sometimes offend a friend without meaning to, in a spirit of gentleness, we can

peace in our friendships.

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