never be you ✩ eric sohn

lying on your bed with your best friend, parallel to him, your head resting just below his chest, you were deep in your thoughts. your eyes stared silently at the ceiling, only lit by the purple neon of your lamp, the tips of your fingers playing mechanically with the edge of your beer can. eric's hand was resting on your stomach, his fingertips sometimes brushing your skin, and you slowly turned your gaze on it. his warm hand looked so imposing next to yours, adorned with some rings that embellished it, although it is already perfect for you.

a sigh left the barrier of your lips, causing the future-to-be-married to turn his face to the top of your head. tomorrow was a big day for him : at the top of his twenty years, he had already found a pearl on his finger. which gave you a lot of hassle. « eric, can i ask you something? » — driven by alcohol, you suddenly spoke up, already regretting what was about to happen. no noise disturbed your peace. instead of going out to party with your friends before the wedding, you both had decided to spend the evening together, knowing full well that it would not be possible anymore in the future.

« yea, what's up? » — even his voice was captivating to you. you felt your heart squeeze in your chest, biting your bottom lip to keep the words from coming out. you didn't want your feelings to take over you : the latter, buried for years, could still have remained hidden. you were head over heels in love with eric. you were in love with his smiles, his mesmerizing eyes, his bad habits, his hands that seemed made to hold yours, his comforting words, his bad jokes.. everything made your heart beat inexplicably.

« are you sure you want to marry her? i mean.. you're still young, you have your whole life in front of you, you could wait a little longer before taking such a big step.. » — you finally stood up, finding yourself sitting cross-legged on your bed. finishing your drink in one go, you easily threw the can in your trash, trying to cover up the red dye on your cheeks with alcohol. you were afraid of losing him. to lose your evenings and your outings together, to lose your moments between just the two of you. nobody mattered more to you than eric, and everyone knew it.

« why are you asking me that? » — eric's answer got you out of your reverie. on his side, he was content to admire your face filtered by the purple light of your room. eric had always thought you were the most beautiful and the best person in this world, he esteemed you more than anyone : even his future wife didn't mean as much to him as you. so knowing that you were wondering about his marriage, piqued his curiosity. he knew he shouldn't be thinking what he was thinking right now, but it was stronger than him. trying to make sure you don't notice him too much, he approached you, causing you to pivot your angelic face to his.

« i just want to be sure you don't make any mistakes. » — your voice was weak when your eyes exploring every feature of his face that you knew by heart. you loved the way his eyes disappeared in crescents moon with each of his smiles, you liked the perfect curve of his jaw, his damn attractive pink lips.. but your weak point was undoubtedly the mole of his eye. nothing was more beautiful for you than this little detail that made eric's eyes bewitching.

suddenly, your best friend's hand landed on your cheek, catching your breath away. his fingers delicately traced the curve of your jaw, carefully watching your every reaction : eric knew full well that you were much weaker with him than with anyone else. a smirk painted his lips as he felt a chill graze your body to the tips of his fingers, confirming all too well the nature of your sudden questions. leaning his face towards yours, he came to lay a chaste kiss on your cheek, the latter shivering at the contact of the cold material of his engagement ring.

when he started to draw the curve of your jawline with kisses, you gently closed your eyes to avoid thinking that this was all a big mistake. « stop that eric, you're drunk. » — your words suddenly made him stop, but only because he approaches your ear, brushing your lobe with his lips : « you are the only one who drank tonight y/n. ». you were too in denial to admit that he was right, because he hadn't had a single drop of alcohol all night long. your hands clung — in spite of themselves, to the sheets of the bed, feeling a wave of shivers rush through your body. but you were probably much more disturbed by his engagement ring against your cheek, than anything else.

you had the impression that eric could read your mind, because his hand left your skin to end up between your two bodies. bringing two of his right fingers to his left ring finger, he grabbed his ring, looking up at you. his warm gaze seemed to pierce you, and you felt the ground give way under your body : eric sohn wasn't good for your sanity. « do you want me to take it off? » — his voice was attractive, ricocheting off the walls to finally reach your attentive ears. your heart was screaming at you to say yes, while your head ordered to say no.

one little kiss. you just wanted one little kiss. but that simple gesture would make your best friend a hideous cheater.

eric didn't want to wait for your answer anymore, sliding his engagement ring on your night table, no longer even caring if this was all right or wrong. his big hands cupped your face, passionately crushing his lips against yours. everything seemed to turn around you two : you had the impression that his feverish kisses had more effects on you than alcohol. your hands were desperately clinging to his t-shirt collar, pulling his body closer to yours. inside you, the guilt was already starting to make you suffer : torturing your stomach all over the place to make you regret your actions bitterly. but the pleasure that was born inside you, and your heart racing in your chest, chased all this painful submersion : you finally had in your hands everything you wanted for years already. eric's wandering hands slipped under your top, brushing your shivering skin, burning every part that went under his fingertips, almost making you moan against his swollen lips.

you felt your body fall backwards, coming in direct contact with the mattress. eric now found himself on top of you, moving away from your lips to explore your neck, leaving open-mouth kisses against your opaline skin. you felt your stomach turn, eager for his touch, for his hands on you, for his feverish kisses.. everything about him drove you crazy. especially when your two bodies have disappeared under the white sheets of your bed.

everything seemed like a dream, despite the fact that you could still feel the effect of eric's warm kisses on your skin. you could remember every little detail from last night : his wandering hands over your body, his long-forgotten engagement ring, his black eyes piercing your soul, his hoarse voice making you shiver, his caramel skin against yours.. every little details of this night of complete happiness for you replayed in your head.

but you were suddenly brought back to reality in your worst nightmare : standing to next to eric, listening to him say his wedding vows to the girl who will be his future wife.

and whom will never be you.