líe is at your service ^-^

Hi! Some of you already know me as Jason Todd's personal lawyer and the most faithful lover, but little did you know that I am also a dedicated writer. You can find my works on ao3, by the nickname krmilia.

You can also find me on ko-fi, right here. You can either leave me a small tip if you like my posts and feel kind enough, or commission a fic. If you have any questions regarding that, feel free to drop in my messages or asks, depending on you.

I am also always very, very happy to receive any kind of asks, especially if they give me a right to yap even more about something.

totally can see Bruce thanking the God because he can finally stop worrying over his son (Dick was doing flips through roofs of Gotham, but Jason is tame like that), only for Jason to read while doing anything and everything and having zero of thoughts about his surroundings. his happiness never last long.

and you would think this is something Jason would outgrow eventually... expect, it gets worse when he becomes Red Hood. at least Jaybin would sometimes register pain and get a wake-up call. Red Hood? no feel of any pain of whotsever. add him constantly getting dissociated and catching derealisations after his death, and it is an awful combo. Bruce is spiralling without a no end.

i also raise you this: Tim and Damian play a game throw paper ball in Jason, who reads and whoever is being caught by Jason on it, ends up losing. the second possibility to lose comes if Bruce catches them doing that. definitely will get you scolding and warning glance. Jason also won't notice Bruce rubbing softly his forehead afterwards.

THIS IS HILARIOUS, SO HERE IS MY TAKE ON IT:

dream anon. your brain is so interesting. /gen

i am going insane how many genius scenarios you have stocked here.

wow, this so heartbreaking to read in the early morning you cannot imagine.

the mixture of humour but angst in Jason's head, both unintentional, is killing me. i don't think either of these kids realise just how tiring it could be, to be them, to have their thoughts, to live like this. the can of worms constantly swarming in your thoughts, reminiscing of all things that hurt you, that despair you, and that beginning from the very early age—

imagine standing next to little pre-Robin Jason, and all you hear in his mind is constant questions like: will mom survive tonight? can i scrap us a little more money? will father ever return from the jail? will i die tonight? is there any food?

and then you have Jaybin, whose thoughts a tad lighter — at least, he thinks of books, school, or family — but it eventually spirals as well in: will Bruce kick me out once? am i a washed out Robin? why i am still hungry? why does everyone on galas hate me so much? i miss my mom.

but let me add this: catatonic Jason is there, too. like a ghost, sometimes, he disappears. sometimes, just stares before himself. but there are no much of thoughts. just a repetitive string of Bruce and dad, all over again. and the more you listen to him, the more you start understanding what each of it means in different times.

angst aside! the son of Shakespeare and shitpost is KILLING ME, and it is so incredible real, and i felt it so much. stealing it.

Jason's thoughts jumping from one to another, which results Duke hearing this:

"what a one ends up becoming if his roots are deep in rotten ground and— omg, lmao, babies camels are so funny. wait, they are called calfs. anyway—"

(probably, Jaybin's thoughts during a fight)

yess, sounds similiar! hehe

so, if you love thinking about Jason and grief, you would love my last fanfic— (gunshots)

jokes aside, THIS. i think this is a thing about Jason that the most people fail to understand — just how full of love and grief he is above everything. all his emotions come from it, not the other way around. he truly did it all for love. he protects because he loves people, especially family members, so deeply. he sacrifices himself for it. he yearns love. he fights for it. and in the end, he dies because he loves so naively, so overwhelmingly, too. and that is his tragedy.

even Garzonas case is ultimately about Jason loving his people, loving Crime Alley, loving these, who deserve to get avenged.

his rage spills not from hatred but from love.

and i adore fics where League members first team up with Red Hood, and their whole perception shatters a little because that is not exactly what they imagined him to be at all. and considering how most of them are metas, aliens, etc, there is always a special layer to their acknowledgement.

i am no better than Bruce Wayne because I went absolutely feral over Ghostmaker's name in my inbox. MINHKHOA KHAN, THE MAN YOU ARE—

you know, i genuinely think that he is one of the best characters out of there, and it happened absolutely accidentally on DC's part. there was a discourse regarding his character once, and how lowkey racistic it was on DC's part, because while he is the first Singaporean character out of there, his name (from what I read, please, tell me more if you have some information on it) lowkey sounds nothing like Singaporean and gives off a mockery vibe to some people. and atop of that, they added him ASPD, which they often condemn in comics. but if they truly tried to demonise him, then they FAILED. because he is great. he is really great.

(almost as that one time when they tried to demonise Jason by talking about he protects prostitutes and wants to see awful pedos dead, lmaooo—)

but anyway, i think Khoa is one of the most fascinating characters out of there. and i love seeing ASPD characters if they are written nicely and bring more to the table than cliche maniacs stories.

i wish they gave him more screen-time and more arc to his duo with Bao Pham because there could be a place for some interesting duo if they ever decided to return the whole Ghost-maker wants sidekick, too, thing—

also, honestly, any other ship w Bruce stopped working with me after I found out about Ghostbat, and to this day, I am a firm believer that it is the best ship with Bruce along with Batcat. nothing else works for me, and I might be biased, but nothing else would work for Bruce in a realistic setting, too.

I know we love discussing Jason being hater in Internet (which is very true, and I think he simultaneously does it from both his own name and Red Hood, depending on who/what he hates at the given moment), but I suggest you this: Jason has an anonymous account to defend his favs on internet. Specifically, vigilantes and superheroes. Specifically, his family members or friends.

And no one needs to know that.

Of course, if you try to question Jason about that matter, he will never admit it. In fact, he often switches accounts if he feels like any of Bats are close to finding out who is writing these furious reddit posts, but. But Barbara knows. And every time Jason tries to bully someone in the family in real life, she can't help but tease him subtly.

omggg, thank you. i also have zero idea how to call it, but it is so exciting to make. i am glad you like it, he-he.

more soon: i found how to make Sappho's lines about Jason Todd—

hi, dear!

YOUR BRAIN, OUCH, OUCH— let me chime in with this addition:

i imagine both Bruce and Jason being restless after this event for nights, ultimately for the different reasons — Jason is wondering if it would change anything at all, if he got it back (no, it won't; if anything, it would hurt more) and Bruce keeps asking himself why Jason did what he did, with the memory.

the bump into each other one of these sleepless nights. stare each other for a while. and then, when they gather their courage, the same question leaves their mouth, at the same time, addressed to each other:

"do you regret it?"

Jason asks if Bruce regrets what had happened between them because of all of that, that memory, let alone, was supposed to mean something for Bruce — Jason used to mean something. so does he regret the bad blood between them? does he?

and Bruce obviously wants to know if Jason regrets their lost connection, their shared warmth. if he wants to take it back now. if their past still means something for him, if Bruce is not lost in his son's eyes.

but maybe they don't realise what this question truly means to each other.

maybe Jason thinks Bruce is asking if he regrets losing that memory (he does and doesn't at the same time — it hurt nevertheless). and Bruce assumes that Jason wonders if he regrets that day, the day of the memory — if he regrets loving Jason so dearly and choosing him over the mission with a new knowledge of what kind of person his son is going to become in the future.

so they stare, stare, stare, and answer simultaneously again:

"no."

and then they leave, bristling at each other, both hurt and arrogant, having no idea that they meant completely different things.

not finding out how loved they are by each other.

We as society really underestimate the concept of Jason hallucinating Sheila of all people. Yes, of course, hallucinating himself, or Joker, or even Willis and Bruce is interesting, but what about Sheila? This woman single-handedly shattered Jason's last drops of belief in parents... Do we really think it doesn't hunt him, the last images of hers, in that warehouse?

From all moments they shared there, I also think it is not the image of Sheila trying to escape along with him in the last minutes, clinging into him helplessly - I think, it is a blurred image of a smocking woman that turned away from him, when he was beaten. A sight he caught on the corner of his eyes, through pain and shock.

So, maybe Jason catches her reflection in the window, when he tries to smoke in his apartment - he doesn't like to do it, the feeling of smoke suffocates him, but that act helps him to pretend once that he has some control over his life and trauma - and she turns away from him again, disappointed, shaking her golden curls. Or maybe once Red Hood gets taken as a hostage by the sheer chance, ambushed or anything vaguely similar to what he had already experienced, he phantomly hears the click of the lighter, and his mother's long, drawled sigh followed by the impatient tapping of her heels against the concrete floor.

Just maybe.

But it is not like anyone else would ever know, right?

(whoops, i will keep that in mind for the next time)

my personal favourite Jason adopting Jason scenario is Red Hood taking care of Arkham Knight. like, Jesus, this boy got so admittedly worse in his timeline that it lowkey makes Red Hood's fate more favourable.

and imagine Red Hood finding this version of himself, that instead of dying that day spent three years abandoned in Arkham. tortured by all scums in the Gotham. endlessly so. while Bruce didn't even search for him, didn't try to do anything — just believed the first bullshit Joker threw at him and gave up. is Joker dead in his reality? yeah. does it change anything, considering Bruce tried to save him until the last moment and even carried his body to police with some grace, while he didn't even bother to search for Jason's corpse? no.

and this broken kid, a constellation of scars, burns, with minimum purpose, abandoned and tired finding Red Hood? it would heal something in both of them. me thinks.

this got me giggling. i rarely think about how fucking hard it must be, owning a property in Gotham, but you know what— i bet they all hate Bats.

do we think these spikes help? i think absolutely not, they are menaces. but i do think the first time it happened, Bruce didn't notice these spikes and landed badly. since then he hates it even more.