it's only life

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when liam was dying of cancer he and coco were already in their peak emo losers era so you know they were watching mcr cancer amvs for full metal alchemist and making themselves even more depressed for no reason

the fact that i said this about tumblr

and a few days later the same exact thing happened to me at my work place. my company is trying to cut costs in the face of these tariffs and rising inflation and the only way they think they can do that is by letting go of a ton of people and slashing the rest of our hours down to the bone. we've already started to run into problems because we don't have the bodies needed to put out small fires before they become big, costly ones and it's just a matter of time before something potentially dangerous happens because the first thing to slip through the cracks are safety precautions. i'm looking for a new job now because i don't want to be there when this happens 😐

this is only tangentially related to tumblr but i just wanted to point out that this business practice is so common. when your ship is sinking you start throwing shit overboard to lessen the weight, it's just how it goes :/

the idea of tumblr actually shutting down is so scary and everyone is saying "back up your blogs" but like... back them up where..... there's literally nowhere left...... i fear it's time to play the violin as the titanic sinks

good choices!! stevie would be the fun sibling who picks you up in the middle of the night to go get slushies at 7/11 and shoot the shit in the parking lot for a while because she knows you're stressed about school and your parents don't understand you but hang in there, everything will be alright :')

coco has such wildly different relationships with all her siblings depending on their age, how long they lived together (if at all), and whether they needed her to be more of a sister or more of a parent. but man she would love it if she could just be the uncomplicated silly older sister :( she almost has that kind of relationship with nico even though he's older than her

here's a bonus super early stage draft because why not

i love that you mentioned third wheeling with casper & coco because in this case coco is actually the third wheel lmaoo

yessss i was so excited for that game and then they pushed the release date back because of my fucking nemesis that is double exposure stealing their spotlight 🙄 and then i totally forgot about lost records :( but i will be playing!!!!

lmaoooo i love that ;-;

it only just occurred to me that "sure" and "four" don't rhyme in every accent

have you ever been bored enough to actually read these? i have.

stop yelling at me everybody makes mistakes

they mean so much to me and i really do wish i could've shared their story with you guys :( they're not going to be part of the book version of frozen pines, but that's actually a good thing in my eyes. it means i'm free to do whatever i want with them and they don't need to be stuck as side characters. casper's side of the story has only ever been tangentially related to asa, so it will be no problem to excise him from the narrative and give him his own story. that's a very far off future idea but i like knowing i have that option :')

SHE LOVES WOMEN!!!!

platonically though 😔

RIGHT WELL ABOUT THAT.... there are a ton of things i had intentions to write but probably wouldn't have gathered the courage to post because they ended up becoming far too personal for me. and frankly i don't think people were ready to read and be compassionate about this specific plot line, which was a huge problem because it was so personal to me. i don't want to go into detail, but it had a lot to do with intrusive thoughts. i realized that i couldn't portray that in the specific way i wanted to using this visual medium. i was terrified that my meaning would be misconstrued considering the topic is already so misunderstood by those who haven't experienced it. basically, i wrote myself into a corner by setting up this plot line and then realizing i actually am sooo not ready to share this with the world.

but i can still answer your question!! the short answer is yes, sometimes.

the long answer is that casper is ace, but for many reasons, you wouldn't hear him use that language himself. he wholeheartedly believes his complicated feelings about intimacy stem from OCD (oh yeah idk if this will be surprising to anyone, but i was in the process of saddling him with that 😌), and who his biological father is and knowing he shares his genetics, and also due to the way he was raised (mikaela may have been really good about teaching safe sex, but she was also a young mom who gave him an extreme fear of pregnancy lmao). it's hard to make sense of these outside factors and how they relate to inherent sexual attraction, and well, honestly... casper is not the type of person to investigate his feelings in this way. as he gets closer with coco and things start heading towards a relationship, he tells her that sex isn't his thing. he likes all the other parts about being in a relationship, he just wishes sex didn't have to be part of it.

she doesn't believe him at first and thinks that he's just using this as some kind of manipulation tactic. given her trust issues and the experiences she's had throughout her life and her career, she genuinely can't imagine that any man would want to be in a relationship without sex – specifically with her, as she has a hard time viewing herself as valuable outside of her sex appeal. neither of them are particularly good at communicating their feelings, so they end their already tenuous relationship and go back to being friends. but with time she realizes he's being honest. it makes her think about what she actually likes & doesn't like about sex. for her, it's a foregone conclusion, something she does even when she'd rather be doing something else, and the times she's enjoyed herself the most are when she's alone (truly alone, not in front of a camera) or when sex is the vehicle by which she can get closer to someone.

later, when they do get together, coco makes it clear that she's fulfilled with the relationship as it is, but that if he wanted to try it, she wouldn't make it a big deal. she knows better than anyone what it feels like to have sex with someone she's not sexually attracted to. it can still be fun, feel good, strengthen bonds, etc. and of course they would stop if it wasn't working out. this is something casper never got from the other people he's been with, no matter how understanding they tried to be. it's the first time he doesn't feel like he's being left out of a joke, or that he has a ton of expectations to live up to. so it does work for them sometimes! just not super often. but everyone's needs are being met and no one is getting pressured so it's all good :)

obligatory disclaimer: this is only representing the experiences of two individuals, this is not meant to be a representation of all asexual people, or all sex workers, or all people with trauma, etc.

i actually posted the outline for that scene here !!

coco is the one who first asked him out and kissed him too. prior to that, she was adamant about not wanting a relationship and casper wasn't going to push her into it. they became close friends and they even dated other people in this time, which got them into some toxic situations because they continued operating in exactly the same way they did before and didn't really care how their relationship looked to other people. their respective partners were never going to take first priority and everyone knew that. at a certain point coco was just like "there are a lot of reasons why this might not work, but what we're doing now is really stupid and i would rather go all in and fail than live a life of half truths" and casper was like "fucking finally <3"

fun fact, this is why i chose when harry met sally to play on the tv during casper and coco's first real conversation

let's all imagine a future where they actually happened