Idk if viv accidentally gave alastor the best villain origin backstory by having him be a black/mixed man only for him to die and end up as a white womans slave and whitewashed with a bad Karen cut. If viv played her cards right she could’ve made alastor a compelling anti hero whose motivation is always ambiguous and you can never tell when she’s gonna snap, but because she couldn’t take the criticism of cultural appropriation with the voodou symbols she HAD to make him mixed to justify the reason when in the leaks it’s still used inappropriately and he is NO WAY in any shape or form black coded. Same with husk just because he has a black va doesn’t mean he’s black coded. Darwin from Gumball is the best example of a black coded character and he’s just a fish with legs

It's crazy how much of the problems with both these shows boil down to "if Viv played her cards right." There's so much potential there, but she never, ever plays her cards right.

I’m so amazed how people can’t see the emotional burden that gets put on Katara throughout the show. I just re-watched “The Deserter” (Book 1, Ep 16) and oml. First, Aang straight up ignores all the wisdom and advice given to him, and pushes too far with fire bending even though he has no control, and burns Katara. And like yes, I get it he is young and naive and impatient. But what really struck me is he burns Katara, she runs off, and learns she can heal herself. (Also really wish they had have her keep the scars, would have been an interesting lesson and more lasting imo) Anywho, then Zhang shows up and she goes to get Aang, and Katara has to end up comforting him because he’s being mopey and self-deprecating saying he’ll never firebend again. My man BURNED this girl and then throws himself a pity party that SHE has to pull him out of and comfort HIM into feeling better. Being healed aside, this makes me so uncomfortable because for a lot of people in unbalanced relationships, this exact scenario plays out all too often. Someone gets hurt, and then it’s their job to make their partner feel better when they get all upset because they’re guilty. Then, after they escape, Katara heals AANG from his battle, and her burns are never mentioned again. I was expecting him to apologize again now that things had slowed down, and nope, nothing! Other than his frantic apologies while she was writhing around in pain, he never says another word about it.

Since she’s healed, it’s all good I guess, right? I’m watching a reaction series of ATLA, and even this guy who’s brand new to the series is calling zutara all the way from halfway into book one. So much about Kataang just feels so icky, and unbalanced, and so much physical and emotional labor on Katara’s part. Forever grateful that there are good fanfics and fandom circles out there to do Zutara justice.

Sorry for the rant, but it just gets to me that some fans seem to have not a lot of media literacy, like how does this inspire thoughts of a happy healthy relationship? Lol but I love your blog sm! Thanks 💛💛

It's actually not that people who ship KA are media illiterate. On the contrary, they are interpreting the show in exactly the way it was meant to be read. It's just that the trope of the Nice Guy stuck in the friend zone who has to prove he's grown up enough for the girl is such a common trope, and appeals to the misogyny that is ingrained in our society. Many people do not recognize the unfair burden put on Katara because it's expected for her to be the one to bear that burden.

And you're right about the situation in the Deserter being manipulative. Aang doesn't do it on purpose, but you're right that in real life, it's a red flag and a hallmark of abusive relationships. It's not framed that way because there is literal magic used to make Katara's pain go away, but it's all part of the narrative of the show choosing to address Aang's feelings about Katara over Katara's actual feelings.

What happens between Katara and Aang is actually very similar to what we see between Azula and Ty Lee in the Beach episode, when Azula makes Ty Lee cry by slut-shaming her, then Azula tells Ty Lee to stop crying and is juuust vulnerable enough to give Ty Lee an excuse for her behavior, and also a reason for Ty Lee to now focus on her: Azula only did that because she was jealous, so now Ty Lee can help by teaching Azula how to pick up boys.

The difference in the way these two scenes are portrayed is that Azula is clearly a villain and Ty Lee has been shown time and time again to put up with things we know she shouldn't. Whereas with Katara and Aang, we're supposed to think Katara bearing the brunt of the emotional labor is fine and normal and not Aang's fault, because the narrative twists to make it not Aang's fault.

I also find the way people mock zutara shippers for imagining Zuko doing the emotional labor to lessen the burden off Katara highly misogynistic. Like, this is so obviously the Nice Guy myth rearing its ugly head again. Women who think they know better about what they need than the Nice Guy does will wind up in an abusive relationship, because no man can actually be better than the Nice Guy. The Nice Guy actually NEEDS to think that no man can be nicer than him, not only because he needs it for his Nice Guy identity, but because it means that he doesn't have to be responsible for any of the labor foisted onto his object of affection.

In contrast, Zutara is threatening precisely because it validates Katara. Zuko's pain is not addressed until he addresses Katara's first, in the caves. His wish for forgiveness is not granted until he helps Katara get closure for her pain. Zuko is forced to do the emotional labor that the show always forces Katara to do. Not just with Aang, but with her brother. That scene where Katara eavesdrops on Sokka talking about how Katara is like a mother to him, with the guiltiest look on her face, is meant to reinforce that Katara should just quietly accept her rile.

Often, enemies to lovers ships are popular because the enemy is the only one that a female character is allowed to express her pain and hurt towards. And boy, does Katara express it towards Zuko. And he takes it in, and listens, and tries to make amends. Zuko actually needs Katara to forgive him in order for the gaang to function. He has to be Aang's firebending teacher. Katara could have just kept on being angry at him, and eventually her anger would have faded the way it does with all the men in her life, and she probably would have quietly internalized it as another part of herself that she needs to repress.

But it's Zuko who chooses not to accept this. Which he also could have done, because lord knows Zuko is used to living with people who hate him. At least Katara won't be actively malicious towards him.

But Zuko actually does what nobody else in the show does. The show makes a point of telling us that nobody else does it, too.

And you know what? Katara still heals her own pain. Zuko makes it possible, but he's pretty passive at the important moments. He watches, and that becomes something really powerful for a character like Katara who is always made to hide her own needs, her pain.

Zuko could have not gone with her on this journey. He could have sat back and waited for Katara to heal herself and reassure him that all was forgiven. But he doesn't. He witnesses. He validates. He lets her rage at him, then accepts her forgiveness when it's time for him to. He knows enough to know that he can't make the decision about what Katara needs, only she can do that.

That's why people write fic where Zuko is sensitive and a good listener and does the cooking and the cleaning and is otherwise the perfect partner. And I think they're so valid for that.

What I said about Azula and Ty Lee is also why Azula x Katara doesn't work as enemies to lovers, because Azula would not be able to do the work that Zuko does to acknowledge Katara's pain. She can't even do it for her friends.

I think as a society we need to shit more on this abomination.Seriously Katara changes her mind on a political/cultural issue just because she wants to make Aang's babies. AND SHE'S FUCKING 15.

So I honestly wasn’t sure if I was going to respond to this ask (just because I tend to stay away from fandom discourse), but when it comes to my girl Katara, I can’t help myself so I wrote this anyways. There are a ton of really amazing analyses of the comics and how the Kataang relationship plays out within them so this will be a sort of personal meta based on my own life experiences.

Again, I’m going to preface this by saying that I’m no expert, and this is based purely off my OWN experiences (and my own research and my own interactions). That being said, let’s get on with the meta.

One of the things that stood out to me from within the original ask is Katara’s age (14 in ATLA and 15 in the comics), and in preparation for writing this take, I spent a lot of time reflecting on the time when I was a 14/15 year old girl. During that time of my life, I went through one of the worst relationships of my life – I won’t go into much detail, but it was toxic and manipulative, and it was with a boy who was actually a bit younger than me.

On a fairly regular basis, I work with both preteens (10-12 year olds) and younger teens (13-15 year olds) as a mentor. Though a lot of them deal with relationship drama, I can honestly say that most of them are not ready to be in a relationship. The same can be said for both Katara and Aang (or just Aang, at the very least). 

If I’m being completely honest, I can see Katara potentially being in a relationship. She’s often portrayed as the most mature member of the Gaang (alongside Zuko toward the end of ATLA season three), and she’s had romantic encounters in the past (those inklings of a thing with both Haru and Jet). Despite all that, though, I’d honestly have loved to see Katara explore herself as a person outside of relationships in the comics (because she’s literally 14/15 and she’s been through war and she’s had her childhood snatched from her). Even still, I wouldn’t have been vehemently opposed to the idea of her being in a relationship because again, she’s 14/15, and that’s when girls “typically” have a greater interest in having one.

Aang, though… Aang is a different story entirely. The fact that boys tend to mature slower than girls is no secret, and there are several studies you can Google right now that discuss the nuance of it. From my own experience working with both girls and boys around Aang’s age (12-13), the boys tend to act at least a year or two younger than the girls of the same age, particularly when it comes to things like dealing with emotions or romantic interest. I’ve had a few discussions on this with my own mentor who’s taught within that age range for over twenty years now, and she’s confirmed my observations. This is not a hard rule, of course, but preteen/teenage boys tend to act roughly a year or two younger than their numerical age. Contextualizing this for Aang, that means that he acts ~10 years old, and this is definitely portrayed/shown throughout the course of ATLA (and the comics).

Not only does Katara have two physical years on Aang (no, we are not counting the 100 years that Aang was in the damn iceberg), she also has several years on him maturity-wise.

Obviously just because a couple has an age gap doesn’t mean that their relationship cannot work. There are tons of girls who date younger guys and have healthy relationships. This, though, usually occurs once both parties’ maturities have levelled so that they’re on equal footing.

This is not the case for Katara and Aang.

They’re both very, very young. They both don’t know who they are as people. Generally, getting into a relationship at such young ages is a very bad idea, particularly when it stems from teenhood into adulthood. There are always exceptions to this, but it’s very easy to lose yourself in another person, especially when your own identity as a person is still not fully formed yet.

That toxic relationship I referred to that I was in when I was 14/15? I ended up in a very similar role to Katara. I would constantly take care of the boy I was with and clean up his messes. If he owed people money, they would come to me and ask for it. If he offended someone, I’d have to apologize on his behalf. If he did something stupid, I’d correct it. When other girls would flirt with him, I’d tolerate it and let it happen because I didn’t know how to express how awful it made me feel. I’d placate him and reassure him and defer to him because that’s how our relationship was. 

This is dynamic of the Kataang relationship. 

The girl allows the boy to make decisions for her rather than coming to one together. 

The girl tolerates the boy flirting with other girls because she doesn’t know how to say how much she hates it.

The girl has to hold the boy together because he’ll lose it if she doesn’t.

The girl doesn’t believe that she deserves better treatment because she’s grown so used to the way the boy treats her and disregards her feelings.

It’s unfortunate, but throughout the comics and LOK, it’s apparent that Aang became Katara’s reason. Her purpose.

And I honestly think that that’s horrifying. I don’t care if she’s “just” a cartoon/comic character. Countless little girls look up to her and adore her and see themselves in her. It’s incredibly problematic to have this sort of toxic relationship play out to such a large audience and be seen as “adorable” and “cute” and “wholesome.”

It only perpetuates this idea that girls need a boy to be their reason. It leads to these little thoughts being planted in their minds. It leads to them justifying a boy’s mistreatment of them because “Aang did it to Katara, and their relationship is GOALS so maybe my relationship is too!”

I’m endlessly grateful that I escaped the relationship I was in. I didn’t make it out unscathed, and I will always carry the scars I received from it to this day. But I didn’t end up married to him, and I didn’t have kids with him, and I’ve been able to establish who I am as a person without him. I’ve been able to leave him and the insecurities/hurts of our relationship behind me, and as I keep moving forward, I heal more and more every day.

Katara doesn’t receive this reprieve. She’s in a toxic relationship from the time that she’s 14, and it affects her deeply until the end of her life. She doesn’t get to discover who she is without Aang. She caters to her partner and constantly has to corral him. She’s left constantly with her two non-airbending children. I have nothing against healing, but the whole warrior aspect of her character is reduced to essentially nothing. It’s horrifying.

I think it’s really, really sad that Katara becomes simply known as “the Avatar’s girlfriend/wife.” It’s not right. More people should be upset by this. More people should recognize the toxicity of the Kataang relationship. More people should realize that the very traits they occasionally condemn in real men are also in Aang.

Bryke did a disservice to both Katara AND Aang through their relationship. Katara’s character shouldn’t have had to revolve around someone else, and Aang’s character shouldn’t have been allowed to stagnate so sharply.

I desperately hope that girls don’t end up in situations like mine or Katara’s. I desperately hope that boys will understand that there needs to be an equality in a relationship. I desperately hope that, if you’re in this sort of unhealthy situation currently, this post can give you the hope and courage to at least begin thinking about what’s best for – not only your partner – but also for you, as a person.

All that being said, Kataang is NOT a good representation of a healthy relationship. At all. Period. Stop romantacizing it, for the love of all women (and others! [because women aren’t the only ones who end up being trapped in toxic relationships – but that’s a discussion for another time]) who are caught up in ones like it.

For those who may have missed it, I’ll say it again.

Kataang is NOT a good representation of a healthy relationship. 

Look at it for what it is, beyond all the nostalgia and misogyny.

Stop romanticizing it. 

"Evil Pomni" swearing every time she spoke gave me HH/HB flashbacks...

(Do you think it's deliberate, or is it just a jab towards characters swearing too much in general?)

It's fun to think that it might have been a jab, but I think it's too subtle to tell. Goose is smarter than Viv that way.

https://x.com/funtimedeluxego/status/1931115232665227452?s=46

Thought you would like this, Chai.

Painfully accurate, and I love it!

It's such a shitty episode but I love the oodles of Charlastor/RadioBelle energy Alastor has in the first half of "Dad Beat Dad", specifically when Lucifer is visiting the hotel. Alastor is SEETHING -- he has that aura of someone who's had to watch his girlfriend slowly crumble under the lack of parental support, who's had to listen as Charlie struggles not to say a bad word against her dad but desperately wishes that things were different. Lucifer hugs Charlie and Alastor looks about ready to bite his fucking arm off.

Oh, without question. He knows better than anyone else save Vaggie and maybe Angel how much she's poured into this dream, and no one's allowed to be an asshole to Charlie but him.