Bigger Vision, Business Building & Better Body

INSPIRATION

Good friends Natalie and Ann-Marie have turned me on to Joel Osteen, after each having become enamoured with his speaking style while flipping through the channels on a Sunday morning.  On a recent trip to Chapters with another good friend, Susan, I spied Osteen's book peering out at me from the bestsellers shelf, and intrigued, I picked it up and began to leaf through its pages.  Waiting for Susan to complete a meeting she was having in the Starbuck's cafe, I strode to the back of the store where rows of chairs invite readers to form long infantry lines of armchair soldiers, travellers, cooks and aesthetes, I found myself a comfy seat and proceeded to read the first three chapters of the book.  In its pages I found the familiar language of my Christian heritage, but reconstructed in a manner which remind me more of the sentiments of Abraham-Hicks' 'The Law of Attraction' or Napoleon Hill's 'Think and Grow Rich' than those found in the fiery sermons I heard in my youth.  One of the lines that I read echoes a line I recently read in Suze Orman's 'The Courage to be Rich', and it seems I am getting the same message from a variety of sources: stop being satisfied with 'just getting by'.  Enlarge your vision.  Dream big dreams.  Know that the favour of God (or the Universe, or Source, or...) is on your side.  Live big, adjust your course, don't hold to the thing that once worked when it is no longer working.  Know that you can be/do/have anything that you envision, and know 'that ye have not, only for a lack of asking'.  Ok.  I get it.  I hear you.  Loud and clear.  Every day a new step on the path to my envisioned future.  Thank you for the inspiration!  Success found in listening for and paying attention to that 'still small voice' coming at me from numerous sources - but essentially from within.

EMPOWERMENT

Hmm...I'm tring to decide if this trio of categories will serve my current purposes here of focusing on successes and I think it can.  In regard to empowerment today, hmmm...well, I feel I had a success in completing a training call with my MXI/Xocai team in Portland.  Two of my stars were on the call and I was also able to record it so that I can send an audio link out to those who were unable to attend.  I feel like we covered some important training and new information, and that we each learned a little more about each other and why we are involved in the business - what our 'why' is for building our individual businesses.  I feel like I was able to empower my team with information, but I have to say above all I am consistently inspired by their enthusiasm and their vision for their own Xocai businesses.  I am blessed to have wonderful people to work with in this chocolate wonderland!

TRANSFORMATION


I declared aloud to a friend this evening my intention to set up a new membership at a gym tomorrow so that I can follow through with my goal of gaining 10lbs of lean muscle mass by my birthday on December 7th, 2009, and being in the 'best shape of my life' by that point.  (To be confirmed by obligatory 'bathing suit' snapshots (for my eyes only!) and a complete physical with my doctor).  Check in tomorrow to see my success in following through with setting up that appointment!

Fun, Food, and Financial Fortitude

INSPIRATION
It's a silly little thing, but I love the amount of joy a new toy or diversion can bring into your life. We've recently opened a Skype account at Norman Flynn to hold conference calls with clients who are currently living in France. We went to Staples, bought a $4.99 microphone, hooked it up to the computer and have had all kinds of fun: pretending to be Bob Barker, taking turns recording funny voices, and pretending at the end of our call to our clients to 'run the credits' at the end of our 'show' as the theme music comes up.

EMPOWERMENT
It wasn't a huge stretch, but the bit of forethought that went into ordering chicken Caesar wraps from Bach's Cafe for Bruce and I to pick up on the way to a string of meetings went a long way towards keeping our blood sugar and energy levels up, and keeping us 'present' to the tasks at hand.

TRANSFORMATION
Listening to a training call by one of my Xocai upline sponsors, I gain this little nugget of wisdom, "The best defense in a lagging economy is your ownability to generate income." - Warren Buffet. This is an ability that I am building in myself each day as I complete my Millionaire Mind affirmations, my VAKS, and generally am present to my attitude toward money, making sure to only entertain positive thoughts.

Choc On!

INSPIRATION
I have to say, I am extremely grateful for being introduced to Xocai Healthy Chocolate by my friend Susan MacMillan. What an amazing company. What amazing people. What an amazing product. And how exciting that we all get the opportunity to build a chocolate business in a sustainable, ethical, empowering manner!

EMPOWERMENT
One stretch that I am proud of today is that I got up when the alarm went off, went for the half hour walk, did my affirmations and VAKS and STILL made it to Norman Flynn in time (well ok I was a few minutes late) for our 8am meeting!

TRANSFORMATION
I love the salutation my friend Faune Creaser used to close an email wishing me well on my new chocolate business - 'Choc on' she said. How perfect is that!? Thanks Faune!

Energy, Energy, Energy!

INSPIRATION
Today I am grateful for the satisfaction that comes with having done a job well. The last couple of days I have been working full out to re-create an empowering work environment for myself, and this evening, my office is clean, clear and completely inviting. Every surface gleams and reflects positive energy back to me. I love how the process of really thoroughly cleaning my home creates a sense of connection with the space I inhabit, and provides me with a sense of ritual and rhythm. At the encouragement of various lifestyle coaches, I have tried hiring people to clean for me, but I just get too much out of it to let someone else do it!

EMPOWERMENT
I have to say I am proud of how I have been pushing through my obstacles the last couple of days as well. With all the work I have been doing creating the optimal work environment, I was completely exhausted by 7pm tonight, and could have very easily gone to bed and slept through the night. Instead, I took a revitalizing nap, did a few more jobs, sent a few emails, paid my bills, got inspired to read in the tub, then realized I needed to do my affirmations and VAKS for today, and am just now crawling into bed to blog, check out http://www.evite.com/ to send invites to a chocolate tasting this Friday, and finish reading a magazine which profiles Xocai, the healthy chocolate company I have just decided to work with. Yahoo!

TRANSFORMATION
One of my four VAKS: "I have boundless energy to achieve all my desires!"

Unexpected Pleasure, Plenty of Productivity and Practicing Presence

INSPIRATION
A rumpled bed - is there any cozier place in the world?

EMPOWERMENT
I participated in an integrity day with Curtis today and did a pretty magnificent job of tackling (and accomplishing) my goals for the day (if I do say so myself). Having clear intentions of what I wanted to accomplish during each of the four hours of the integrity day I was able to stay much more focused and (gently) push myself to achieve my goals. I've decided that I will take advantage of integrity days whenever possible.

TRANSFORMATION
My dad sent me a very cute animated e-mail today which features photos that he took while he was visiting a couple of weeks ago. It starts with a quote from Albert Camus, "Autumn is a second spring, when every leaf is a flower". This reminds me to take the time to enjoy the beauty of the season (in every season).

Vision, Victory and Value

INSPIRATION:
There is a lovely maple tree situated directly outside of the window in the main hall of my flat, and I love catching glimpses of it as I rush down the hall to answer the phone or as I move from the bedroom to the kitchen. It is a harbinger of the seasons, and I love it most during this glorious season of fall when the afternoon sun sets its leaves ablaze in a triumphant blaze of energizing orange.

EMPOWERMENT:
I'm really proud of how I managed my time today. A few days ago I sketched out a chart of daily rituals outlining times to get up, go for a walk, have a shower, do my affirmations, eat breakfast and take vitamins among other things, and I've been able to give myself a 'gold star' in every section today. I was powerful in my action, and balanced in my execution of the tasks at hand and even got a 15 minute power nap in around the middle of the day.

TRANSFORMATION:
Chatting with my life coach Curtis about a new business opportunity this morning, I am fired up with enthusiasm and realise that the Millionaire Mind affirmations that I am embodying each morning really are having an effect on my mindset and the way I present myself in the world. I am particularly struck by the affirmation which states, "I deserve to be rich because I add value to other people's lives" and I am excited about the value I can bring through the vehicle of this new business idea.

New AND Improved!?

After a year and a half hiatus, I am back to the blogging world. I've been working with life coach Curtis G. Schmitt for the last year, and as part of my work with him, I have (finally) decided to return to the very purposeful practice of recording three beautiful things each day.

I've added a twist this time around, which is to divide my three beautiful things into three beautiful categories. A few years ago I attended Landmark Education's 'Forum' and 'Advanced Course'. As part of one of those courses it became very clear to me that who I am is the possibility of inspiration, empowerment and transformation.

For me, this means that I am committed to being inspired and inspiring. That I am committed to being empowered and empowering. And that I am committed to being not only transformed myself, but also being a transforming presence in the world. As such, I am going to use those categories daily in my practice of creating presence of mind through blogging.

INSPIRATION
One beautiful thing that inspires me each day. Most likely this will be a beautiful person, place or thing, maybe even you, dear reader!

EMPOWERMENT
One beautiful action that constitutes a sucessful stretch for me each day.

TRANSFORMATION
One beautiful affirmation, quote or other bit of wisdom that contributes to the powerful shift not only in my own life, but in the world as a whole - what an exciting time to be alive!

It is my hope that if you are reading this blog, you too will be inspired, empowered and transformed by what you read (it's also a tool which will enable Curtis to keep me accountable to my goals by checking in on my progress from time to time)

Blessings to all. Please feel free to comment or send questions if you have them. To protect your privacy, comments or questions will not be posted unless you specifically request that I do post them.

Engendering Happiness, Light and Health

1. Feeling rather mopey this morning (even after going to bed early last night) I remindmyself (without being hard on myself) that I will engender more of whatever I focus on and that I have a choice as to what that will be. I am grateful that I have established Zelig Three as way to create more of what I want in my life.

2. When we first looked at this flat I was afraid that it might be dark and dreary, but as it turns out, with the heavy curtains gone and the wall colours lightened up, there is actually a very lively interplay of light throughout the space all day long - best of all we get the early morning rays squeezing through a gap in the neighbouring houses and into our bedroom.

3. I am grateful that I have my health, and that I am able to direct my efforts toward empowering others who are having a challenge with their heath at the moment (www.milliondollarmay.com).

4. I just opened the back door to let Zelig out and the forsythia in the yard next door is ablaze in its golden glory. Dee-licious.

Peeping Tom, Rallying Relations, Stunning Sun

1. After rushing home at lunch time to let Zelig out for a run, I am walking back to Statement and I am delighted to look up to see a rather plump set of very white legs peeking out from behind an aqua-coloured blanket draped over a second-floor verandah. Summer is definitely on its way!

2. Last night I lay awake in bed, worrying that perhaps my idea to make a million dollars in one month for various charities is a bit crazy. I hope that I haven't offended any of Maureen's friends or family. This morning I got a round of cheering responses that supported me in my rather large vision.

3. Sitting in Statement with the sun streaming through the clerestory windows high above and being transfixed by the vibrancy of colours in the play of light the sun affords.

The Dash, The Balm, Million Dollar May

1. After two and a half months in limbo and thinking that I really should get back to my three beautiful things, I receive a link to this the site http://www.thedashmovie.com and am reminded how important it is to be grateful for all the good things in our lives!

2. A balmy 24 degrees celcius (in April! in Halifax!) and a slice of delicious sunshine across my face as I walk to work at Statement is almost too much goodness to bear!

3. I've been asked to help co-ordinate a silent auction as part of a benefit for my good friend Maureen Keating who is recovering from a cancerous brain tumour. In a matter of days it has gone from being a small silent auction to a "Million Dollar May" campaign with (hopefully) national and international media attention - raising the profile of several of Maureen's favourite charities and providing them with substantial donations. I am both exhilerated and mortified by the prospects of the task at hand, but grateful to have an opportunity to make an impact in this way.

Naturally Gorgeous, Hello There, Eleven Eleven

1. It seems like a silly little thing, but I think I actually like the way my hair is looking of late - and how its natural waves and curls seem to fall right into place when I simply let it air-dry and do its own thing.

2. One of the things that I disliked the most about being in Toronto was the way that it seemed almost impossible to connect with friends or family members - even if they only lived a few short blocks away. Tonight after Ray drops me off after work, I am waiting for the light to change when I notice a gaggle of people waving at me - and realize it is my good friend Susan with a couple of other friends from her work. They are heading to a movie at the Oxford Cinema and invite Tyler and I to join if we'd like. This is exactly the kind of community and happenstance that I missed in Toronto.

3. I lay awake at night and cannot, for the life of me, get to sleep. I rise to realise that it is 1:11 am. I often see times such as this displayed on the clock. 1:11, 11:11, 4:44, 11:44 and so on. I also saw these recurring numbers on exit signs and mileposts all the way here from Toronto. I've been told that these are angelic messages or other harbingers of good things to come (they often do come at the most auspicious times) - and I always get a little thrill whenever I see them.

While She Was Out, Visions of Sunshine, Good Puppies

1. Tyler and I have both been a bit under the weather and staying at our friend Angela's place. Being 'under the weather' has led to the watching of entirely too much daytime television - specifically makeover shows. We get inspired to rearrange Angela's furniture for her and make things a little more cozy for when she will arrive home from her 'Snoop Dog' concert around 2 in the morning. We buzz about the house pulling accessories and furniture pieces from other rooms and in just under an hour we have completely transformed the living room making it look cozy and 'lived in'. Hopefully the 2am Angela will share our enthusiasm!

2. Tonight we head out to see an apartment at Tower Road and Victoria. Although it's one of the grungiest apartments I've seen (you'd think if you were trying to sublet an apartment you would at least drag a broom haphazardly across the floor in an effort to tidy up the stray brown plant leaves and cigarettes and bottle caps, but apparently that hadn't occured to this guy) I am inspired by a turret full of windows, a wood stove, and a wall of cedar siding which, with a fresh coat of paint on everything else, could actually conspire to make this a bright and 'Wallpapersih' little flat. Bedtime finds me, sketchbook and pencil in hand, coming up with furniture layouts for the prospective apartment (even though we're not even sure it has laundry - all I can think about is that sun-soaked turret).

3. With cold, flus, migraines (the first ever - I have a whole new appreciation for you migraine sufferers!) and general malaise - combined with the particular angst of being in a state of transiton between homes and not yet knowing where we will be living, I have been particularly cranky, yet somehow Tyler is able to see and encourage the good in me. This makes me think of my 'good puppy' revelation way back in the summer when we first got Zelig. We're all really just good puppies on the inside. Thanks Ty.

Mile High Sky, Family Matters , Abundance

1. I know it's ridiculous how much I talk about the sky here, but earlier today I enjoyed an article in Utne magazine all about clouds and on my way home something about the reflected glow on the buildings in front of me makes me turn to take in a most breath-taking ribbon of candied persimmon running along the edge of a breathless blue sky and forget all about the troubles of the day.

2. My mom has never met Tyler (or any of my previous partners for that matter) and though I often wish that she would be open to doing so, I find my spirits lifted when, while hanging up the phone after a conversation with my mom, Tyler remarks how it is odd, but he feels that in some strange way he actually does have a relationship with my mom as he is usually in the background during most of my telephone conversations with her, and I include tidbits about each of them in my conversations with the other.

3. We posted our coffee table for sale on Kijiji, sold it tonight, and were able to make a $250 profit on it. Between that and the rebate cheque on our rent, which we also received this evening, we are feeling rather 'flush' (or at least 'covered') as we prepare for our roadtrip back to Halifax.

Chattering Windowpanes, Surf's Up, Man on a Mission

1. This morning brings the first real snow we have had this season - most of it coming from the east in the form of ice pellets rattling against the bedroom windows while we are still tucked cozily in bed. Later, Zelig and I head out towards the beach. His nails give him great traction, but I slip and slide along behind him and he marches ahead, undeterred.

2. We come to the edge of a rise beyond which appears a rapidly churning, roiling lake. It's as animated as I have ever seen it and it brings to mind images of surfers riding the frothy crests of winter waves at Lawrencetown Beach in Nova Scotia.

3. I've been enjoying reading books by David Bach and Jean Chatzky on personal finance lately and am gearing up to be my best budget-conscious, goal focused self in 2007.

A City to Myself, Confidant's Confidence, Tuckered Out / Tucked In

1. My friend Ray is in town from Halifax and has asks me to join him as he tours the Toronto Furniture Market. Hence I am up before dawn, showered and dressed and on the streetcar by 7:30am. Unencumbered by traffic or other passengers wanting to board, the streetcar glides silently across Queen Street like a ghost ship sailing through a sea of scattered snowflakes.

2. It's comforting to reconnect with Ray. He and I worked together for two years while I was in Halifax, and I will be rejoining him at his shop called Statement when we return to Halifax in a few weeks. I always enjoy our conversations and have received much sage advice from him over the years. I am buoyed by the fact that he seeks my counsel on many of the pieces that he chooses for the store, and seems to genuinely appreciate the insights I have to share.

3. Getting ready for bed and feeling a bit tuckered out after almost 10 hours in a stuffy convention hall, Tyler offers to make me a cup of tea, I accept, he asks what kind, I say the usual, and minutes later I am presented with a steaming mug of chai tea, sweetened with a teaspoon of honey and made all the more smooth with a shot of silky soy milk.

Sleep-in, Shop-in, Stare-in

1. Having worked an extra hour the other day means I get to sleep in and go to the store a bit later today.

2. Sam's store is the busiest today that it has been since I have been working there. With about twenty customers in the store at any one time and three major sales, it feels like a rather productive day.

3. At some point today (I can't remember exactly when) Tyler and I have a bit of a cheeky stare-down and I relish a few moments in which to ponder the rich chocolaty brown-ness of his eyes.

Missing Cousins, China Blues, Grade Egg

1. My cousin Nancy and I have made plans to head out to the country to visit my grandma. Nancy and I grew up together, went to the same high school and attended many church-related events together, and it is nice to spend the day with her, both catching up on what's new and reliving several fun memories.

2. We decide to take grandma out for lunch to Yin's in Waterford, a favourite local Chinese restaurant, where we each get to choose a favourite dish. Grandma's request is for the sweet and sour chicken balls, Nancy chooses the chow mein, and I go for the diced chicken with vegetables and almonds. Served up steaming hot in great mounds in wok-like serving dishes, this is Canadian-Chinese food at its best. (Although I do still miss the Halifax egg rolls with the unidentifiable greyish brown filling which sounds so incredibly terrible, yet tastes so incredibly good). It's always fun to see grandma's icicle blue eyes sparkle mischievously, and they seem particularly enchanting today against the pink hues of her sweater and those of the wallpaper behind her.

3. Upon our return to grandma's apartment she pulls out a photo album which contains a smattering of photos from across the years, and lo and behold we come across a couple of grandpa grading eggs in the old blue barn on the farm.

1. Changing displays

2. Halifax Flat

3. Arrested Development

1. Holts

2. Empowerment of reading - Jean Chatzky, Martha Rules

3. Couple on Streetcar - crinkled eyes - the way his mouth curls up when he smiles.

Get a Rhythm, Safe Harbour, Pep Squad

1. Using my SAD lamp on a daily basis seems to be resetting my internal clock and I find myself waking naturally around dawn feeling rested and having enough energy to get up and write my morning pages.

2. The whole idea of heading 'home' to Nova Scotia seems to have provided us with a sense of purpose and set us into a state of action. It's opened up new ways of thinking about our purpose in life and how to create meaningful work (or right livelihood) in ways that we might not have thought about before. It's also got us thinking and talking about the future, making plans together, so that even in the midst of the 'hardships' of the last several months, it's nice to know that we have each other, to know that we have successfully weathered our first 'storm', and are enthusiastically charting our next course.

3. As an added benefit of all this talking of heading back to Nova Scotia, we hear from our friends and 'family' back in Halifax about how excited they all are about the possibility of having us back in their midst. I had a chance to speak with Susan and Maureen this evening. Tyler has been keeping Angela updated on a regular basis. Ray and I have been back and forth regarding plans for us to work together again. It is comforting to have these little connections across the miles.

Get the Scoop, Confessions of Closet Word Sleuth, I Can Be Such a Goof

1. Have you ever noticed how sometimes the anticipation of a thing is almost as good as the actual thing itself? Walking down Queen Street the last couple of days I've noticed that Ed's Real Scoop looks to be closed, and I am a bit surprised as I thought I'd read that they stayed open all winter. Today a closer inspection leads me to a hand-written note taped to the door saying that they are closed for painting and cleaning and plan to re-open on Sunday if the weather is nice. Just the thought of a sunny Sunday afternoon and a scoop of Ed's toasted coconut gelato has me beaming for hours.

2. For some reason, while treating ourselves to Starbucks last weekend, I decided to start a crossword puzzle in the Toronto Star I found lying on a sunny window ledge beside our table. I've often associated crosswords either with extremely bookish types or seniors sitting in comfy chairs beside crackling fires (or even people with nothing better to do!), but it seems my competitive streak gets the best of me I'm hooked to the point that I find myself working on another puzzle this weekend. This time it's me sitting in the comfy reading chair by the fire, and although I am actually enjoying it, I tell myself the real reason that I am doing it is because it's good for my memory.

3. This evening I head to bed in a bit of a sulky mood, pretending I don't want to engage with the outside world, attempting to isolate myself from any kind of open communication. Fifteen minutes later my entire being relaxes as Tyler slides into bed beside me and, slipping an arm around my waist and one under my pillow, moulds the contours of his body perfectly to my own. A sigh of relief issues from deep within, 'he really is perfect' it seems to say.

Hot Toddy, Tuna Melts and Top 40

1. It's funny how comforting even just a cup of hot water can be. I'm on to my second cup of tea for the morning before I notice that in my rush out the door Tyler has forgotten to add a tea bag to the thermos. This reminds me of my great Aunt Hazel who, in her younger days, was always at the forefront of new health trends. We often spend a week at the end of the summer with her at her cottage, and often to reduce her caffeine intake, she would drink hot water instead of coffee.

2. Dinner this evening is a couple of tuna melts with old cheddar, yogurt and herbs de provence on giant croissants. I tell Tyler that this has funnily enough become one of my favourite meals. Comfort food I guess.

3. Classical 96.3 often plays the classics of the classics - the stuff almost everyone is familiar with. Sometimes this gets on my nerves, but this evening after dessert and sitting here typing away in the intimately lit living room it seems just right.

Birds, Birds, Birds

1. Walking home from Sam's store I turn to look up a side street and behold a tree which at first glance might seem to be fully in leaf, but the 'leaves' which fill out this tree are moving and jostling about in a most peculiar fashion. Upon closer examination I see at what appears to be hundreds of grackles 'leafing' out their arboreal perch.

2. A bit further along on my walk, I hear a chorus of flapping and look up to see a flock of pigeons moving as one in the sky above. First they fly north, then a sharp bolt straight up, back to the south side of the street and so on, moving in perfect unison with no one leader. Won't it be nice when we humans remember how to work together in this way?

4. Halfway home at the corner of Queen and Kingston Road I look up yet again, this time to see the black power lines of a music staff dotted with a rather 'busy' piece of music featuring starling 'notes'.

Tackled, Tickled, Transformation

1. I take a bit of guilty pleasure in the fact that Zelig seems to love to "pick on" me (and not so much on Tyler) - pulling at my jeans, nipping at my sweater sleeves, and ambushing my shins as I emerge from the hallway or the bedroom. I know this is probably some sort of dominant behaviour that ought to be quelled before it gets completely out of hand, but I can't help being overcome by the cute "puppyness" of it all. I also know that it's a bit naughty of me, but I kind of like the way it gets Tyler worked into a bit of a frenzy when Zelig pesters me this way. Sorry Ty!

2. Riding home on the streetcar, I am caught off guard by a blaze of pink whipping the western sky into wispy mounds of cotton candy.

3. Climbing the final hill on my walk home from the streetcar, I can almost feel the light of the moon pulsing in the sky behind a bank of gauzy clouds, pushing back the dark of night.

Walks, Talks and Treats

1. Zelig and I have gotten into the habit of going for a twenty or thirty minute walk each morning, and with the weather being as pleasant as it has been this has been a pleasure. The sky was crystal clear and the sun illuminated the morning's glory.

2. A few months ago we picked up David Bach's "Smart Couples Finish Rich" and I have been pecking away at it for awhile. Today Tyler and I do some of the exercises, discussing our top five values around money. I find a sense of empowerment in spite of the lean phase we are in. I see how we really could be at a point of moving forward very quickly as it relates to finances.

3. Even though we are trying to be good and not indulge in 'junk' foods, a post-dinner daze finds us longing for something to fill our craving for something sweet. The cupboards are nearly bare but we have a lemon and we have some eggs, so I am able to whip up a little lemon custard which hits the spot with its sweet tanginess.

Luxurious Lake, Guilty Pleasures, Home Sweet Home

1. The lake is a bolt of fine striated italian silk, ranging from nearly turquoise close the shore to a deep ocean blue near the horizon.

2. We've just discovered that we can now watch all the recent episodes of ABC's primetime shows through streaming technology recently released here in Canada (a privilege (?) previously reserved for those living in the US). Aside from a few technical difficulties we are rather enjoying the guilty little indulgence of watching the almost cartoonish series 'Ugly Betty'.

3. In the middle of a brisk walk to return a dvd to our favourite video store up on Kingston Road, we are striding along on a street we haven't walked before when I look up to see the most adorable little brick cottage complete with Georgian columns flanking the front door and a rather truncated octoganal "turret" which looks like it would provide an excellent spot to curl up with a book or gaze out into the trees and daydream. I'm completely green with envy - if only I could airlift it out to Halifax or a larger estate lot and set up house in this little gem!

Toronto the Good - Halifax the Better, Father Hen, Flurry of Friendship

1. Beset by the phyical symptoms of exposure to mold, and finding ourselves a bit adrift in a city we don't really love, we are suddenly considering a move back to Halifax. I have to admit I have pined for my fair 'maritime home' a bit ever since we left, but it wasn't until today when Tyler admitted that he might actually enjoy living in Halifax more than here that I let my true exuberance start to show.

Before you could say "U-haul" I was on the internet looking up apartments, exploring possible job opportunities and calling up friends to see if they thought we were insane. (Of course I only called the completely biased ones who would love to see us back in Haligonia).

2. My dad calls to tell me he has been worried about me since hearing that I sold the car over a week ago. He can't imagine me getting along without a car (even though the streetcar stop is a mere five minute walk from our front door) and feels terrible that he couldn't help me come up with a little extra money to get it fixed up and running properly. I assure him that everything is fine and that everything works together for good. Although I sometimes see my dad's worries and anxiety-filled phone messages as a bit of a perturbance, I am grateful that I do have a dad who loves me and wants to see me happy and successful.

3. I wrap up the evening with a conversation with my good friend Carolyn. For whatever reason, I don't have a lot of friends who have been with me for great lengths of time, but Carolyn and I have been friends now for over 10 years. She has seen me through everything from my first fling to my officially coming out to finally finding my life partner and her loyalty and support have never waned or wavered (even though we both come from fairly fundamentalist Christian backgrounds). Carolyn accepts everyone with her own special brand of grace and unconditional love. Not only that, but we have great conversations and she always gets me thinking about things in a new light. Sometimes she can be a flurry of excitement and enthusiasm, and other times she is a deep well of wisdom, both elements of her personality which have made my life's journey all the more rich.

Lazy Bones, Proud Pollyanna, Ginger Pork Surprise

1. Is it wrong to say that one of my favourite things today was to sleep in an extra hour on an extra grey morning? It really was.

2. Walking along a rather grey and dismal Queen street, on my way back from picking up a tea at Tango Palace, only to look up and see a tiny break in the steely grey, beyond which snowy white clouds ushered the way to a glimpse of vibrant blue sky beyond. This reminds me of an observation that I made once while flying - every day is a sunny day once you get to the other side of the clouds. Trite sounding I suppose, but some days that's just the kind of reminder I need - sometimes on a literal level, sometimes on a more figurative one.

3. In an effort to create a soup which will nourish our somewhat compromised immune systems, I fill a pot with ginger and garlic, chicken broth and broccoli, and quick grill up some pork sausages on the barbeque, slice them and add them to the pot, and the results are actually quite delicious!

Folding, Films & Fantasies

1. Inside for the majority of the last couple of days, it is lovely to round the bend of the driveway to see the lake folding over on itself and hear it thundering down upon the hard-packed sand of the beach.

2. One of the little joys of the holidays is staying in and watching heaps of movies. Today we watched 'Everything is Illuminated' and later ' Casanova' both of which were stirring in different ways, the former being quirky and touching, the later filled with enchanting views of Venice in the 1600's and plenty of gorgeous period costumes - and a quirky love story of its own.

3. On a whim we decide to look at properties for rent and for sale - in Newfoundland of all places! Tyler has been talking with his friend Shannon who lives there and their Christmas conversation has filled our heads with visions of moving back to the maritimes. Are we crazy?

Eat & Run(ners), Heart Strings & Puppy Heads

1. Spending our first Christmas Morning together as a family, we sleep in a wee bit and then enjoy a big breakfast of French Toast and bacon with oranges wedges and cranberry sauce. As we are feasting on our delicious breakfast, we are bemused by the number of runners and families out walking about the neighbourhood on this rather spring-like day.

2. Coming home from Christmas supper, with my dad and his partner at my brother's house, to the tiny voice of my grandmother wishing me a Merry Christmas and telling me that she missed me at the larger family get-together today. Hearing her sweet message makes me want to rent the nearest car and load up Tyler and Zelig and head out to the country for a visit. Perhaps tomorrow?

3. I love this picture that Tyler snapped the other day while he was at home alone with Zelig:

Happy Christmas Everyone!

Green Christmas, It's the thought that counts, Keeping Mom

1. Having forgotten to buy raffia or ribbon for Christmas presents, but at the last moment coming up with the rather brilliant (if I do say so myself) idea of throwing together some cellophane and the chartreuse napkins we picked up IKEA and tying up the works with some rather sophisticated black satin ribbons. Instant holiday! (I particularly liked the limey green rubber gloves we had purchased for my brother, caught up into a multi-fingered bow, topping his cellophane package of tea lights and cucumber cleaning wipes (don't ask).

2. Coming home from a Christmas Eve dinner with my mom and brother to find that Tyler had gotten caught up in the frenzy of wrapping and had four bright green packages tied up with black ribbons. Though they were smallish presents (as mine were for him due to our lean budget) each one was a wonder of thoughtfulness - and all purchased in our local area of the Beaches.

3. As much as the holidays can be a bit of a bone of contention with my mom not being able to accept that I have a man as a partner instead of a woman, it was still very lovely to have dinner with her and then walk home under a balmy, star-strewn sky.

Blessings of Recuperation

1. It seems I've picked up a bug (or gotten a mad case of food poisoning) and have been sick as a dog all day. Tyler has been a true saint, cleaning up after me, making sure I have what I need to eat and drink, and generally taking care of me - as well as making sure Zelig gets his walks in. I am blessed to have a partner who loves me and who practices these acts of kindness without any fanfare.

2. Although it's not much fun being sick, it does somehow provide one with a sense of the expansiveness of time, and in some ways, of what a luxury it is to lie in bed all day. Why do we wait until we are sick to do this? Where did this insatiable western work ethic come from? What of laying in bed and watching the tree branches sway in the wind, listening to the waves break upon the beach, and noticing the way the light changes throughout the day as the sun traces its golden arc around the apartment? What of that, then? I think I know what I'm doing on Boxing Day...

3. If it's up to me, heaven will be one big bathtub with a momentous stack of reading standing close by.

Calabrese Christmas, Goodness, Perfect Stranger

1. Heading out to Baldini (a relatively new Italian restaurant that has opened up on Queen Street) for Christmas dinner at Sam's invitation. Dinner was tasty, the wine was delicious, and Sam had us in stitches most of the night.

2. Feeling very moved and affirmed when Sam told Tyler and I that he could see that we were very good together. Being very moved by how good and how generous Sam is.

3. Being a little tipsy after our dinner out with Sam and ending up sharing a cab back to the Beaches with a good-natured (also slightly tipsy?) stranger named Heidi. We're glad not to have to wait for the streetcar, and get a cozier cab ride for about the same price as the fare for the TTC.

Enjoyable Lightness of Being, Space Shift, Meeting My Match

1. Having sold the car I feel a bit lighter - like I am travelling and have the opportunity to avail myself of the wonders of public transit. Odd as it may seem, I actually enjoy riding the streetcar. It's a bit of an introduction into the many worlds of the city. Different people going different places for different reasons - it's rather fun to speculate who might be going where and why. It gets me out of my own little world and more aware of my surroundings.

2. Our recessed lights were finally installed today, and it feels good to have taken the opportunity to do a thorough cleaning of the living room. Rearranging the furniture always seems to bring new life to a space and provides one with the opportunity to have a different perspective.

3. I'm a bit riled up tonight, having fallen into a bit of an aggravated mood after a frustrating telephone conversation. A bit sarcastic, and perhaps testing my limits with Tyler, he very wisely takes my vitriol with a grain of salt, and won't let me get away with more than the necessary venting.

Happy Feet, Little Treats, Mystery's Neat, A Jazzy Beat

1. The bracing wind off the mid-day lake is invigorating as I briskly put in my 40 minute walk to Sam's shop.

2. I decide to stop into the dollar store on my way home and find all kinds of little treasures jumping out at me under the fluorescent glow. Lime green miniature Chinese paper lanterns for Christmas decorations, my favourite microfibre cleaning cloths (perfect for everything from washing dishes to washing windows - and very environmentally friendly as they save the lives of many a grateful tree who gladly do not have to be ground up and stamped into little squares of paper towelling), coin wrappers (so we can finally clear up the shelf in the closet where all our loose change lands), a chocolate bar to quiet the rumblings in my tummy, and a packet of gum so I can hide all evidence of there every being a chocolate bar.

3. Arriving home to find a mysterious package containing one 'miniature electric grand piano'. To whom does this mysterious gift belong? Has someone finally recognized my latent vocal talent and decided to spur me on to musical greatness by providing this fine instrument? Hmmm...the intrigue of how the story will unfold.

4. Listening to the honeyed tones of Emily Claire-Barlow as she croons out holiday standards on CBC's 'The Arts Tonight'.

Divine Finds, Done Deals, and Fine Wines

1. Just by chance we happen upon the 'set sale' for the movie 'Hairspray'. We have fun poking about the various odds and sods of bric-a-brac and tacky chic. We circle around a few times until we agree that we both like the lines of a pair of teak chairs - both upholstered vinyl, one in olive green, the other butter yellow. The price tag says $30 for the pair. We talk the set stylist into giving them to us for half the marked price. We later peel away the sticker to find that they had originally been marked at $75 for the pair. What a steal! We are even more pleased to find the original price tag on the bottom of the chairs which reads $325 (which is obviously inflated much in keeping with our egos at having struck such a 'deal'). We have visions of posting them on e-bay and selling them for hundreds if not thousands of dollars as the chairs that Queen Latifah or perhaps John Travolta sat upon. Hmmm. Not a bad idea!

2. Tonight after many weeks of emails back and forth over the internet, we have finally sold our car to the sweet young couple who came to view it on Sunday. I feel very much like a father, cautioning them to drive carefully and asking them to call us when they get home safely. I turn off the lights in the bedroom so that I can watch them slowly pulling out of the driveway with my little silver bug. All day Tyler and I have been reminiscing of the many journeys we have shared in our little car. I am reminded of other road trips with good friends, exploring the back-roads of Nova Scotia and I am grateful for what a gift it has been to me. Thanks little bug. Be every bit as wonderful for this new young family as you have for us. Get them safely where they need to go.

3. We decide to have a little celebration dinner after the successful sale of the car so we bundle up and walk down the hill to Vi Vetha, a cozy little neighbourhood bistro with plastered walls the colour of August wheatfields. We both order the steak with mushrooms and gorgonzola. It's been so long since we have gone out to dinner just for the fun of it (and not due to the fact that we don't have a proper kitchen) that we are both near to welling up with tears as we sink our teeth into the savoury appetizers and main course, followed by decadent desserts. We are lucky to have come on Prix Fixe menu night and get out for under eighty dollars including our indulgent two glasses of wine each and a healthy tip for our pleasant waitress. What little things we take for granted. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Wish List, Accomplice, & Side-Dish

1. Today a rather tall, dark and handsome character came into the shop and poked around for a bit, keeping a rather close eye on me all the while. It was rather apparent that he was taken with me, and while I was wrapping up his purchases, I asked if he had gotten everything on his Christmas list to which he promptly replied, "Well no. Unfortunately, I don't have you." As corny as it may sound after the fact, I have to admit it was rather flattering to think that the now 35 year-old me might still be able to turn the odd head. Perhaps that Susan Miller at Astrology Zone is on to something - she said we Sagittarians would be completely irresistible this month!

2. Sam sits me down to tell me that in my first week at the shop he has had rave reviews about me from several of his customers. Not only that, but he is impressed by the amount of knowledge and skill that I have brought with me - not to mention the fact that I have found cleaners and paints and stains for touch up work that he didn't even know he had - and he wants to raise my hourly wage by an extra $2 per hour.

3. A few weeks ago, when things were looking particularly bleak on the financial front, we picked up a couple of super-cheap packets of pre-seasoned rice side dishes at Price Chopper on Victoria Park. Feeling rather lazy tonight, and wanting to save money on dinner so we could splurge and head down the street to the Fox for a $6 viewing of 'Shut up and Sing' (featuring the Dixie Chicks) we decided to cook up one of the packets of rice. It actually turns out to be quite tasty. Tyler whips up an equally tasty salad of cucumbers, tomatoes, orange pepper and orange wedges, and we have a dinner fit for a couple of kings. We end up cooking the second packet as a late-evening snack. Not bad for seventy-nine cents!

Morning Sunshine, All about Me, Chai Tea, A Friendly Proposition

1. After having gone to bed tired and cranky (a sure recipe for a night of fitful sleep and terrifying dreams) it's a pleasure to wake up with Tyler still sleeping quietly beside me. I nuzzle in close for a good half hour of snuggling before jumping out of bed, into the shower, and racing out the door to the Centre for Conscious Living.

2. After dinner, Tyler and I conjure up some ideas as to what the 'next-steps' might be for me in regard to both career & creative self expression, and how I might actually go about acheiving these steps. I get that familiar rush of adrenaline and excitement, thinking that I actually could make something important and meaningful of my life!

3. A quick jaunt to Chapters and a chai tea from Starbucks never fail to hit the spot when it comes to feeling indulged and comforted.

4. A sweet young couple has come to look at the car that I have for sale. They, like us, are in a bit of a financial predicament and are in dire need of a vehicle. I find myself dangerously on the verge of forgetting about my own needs and offering them an incredible deal just because I like them so much. I restrain myself, and we continue the negotiations, but somehow I could see this culminating in the four of us sharing a meal together enjoying each others' company. Who knows, perhaps we have found a buyer for the car and a couple of new friends in this big old city.

Sunnyside Up(town), Ginger Crinkles, Roar

1. Walking 'uptown' to the bank on Queen Street, preferring to zig-zag and dodge other pedestrians on the north sidewalk rather than zipping along on the south side of the street - just so that we can soak up a little bit more of the gorgeous sunshine on this unbelievably spring-like day. I know it's somehow morally wrong, but there's a dark side in me that can't help rejoicing ever so slightly at the prospect of global warming (although in reality I do as much as I can to prevent it).

2. On the way home, from the corner of my eye, I catch a glimpse of a thirty-something dad emerging from Starbucks to present his wife/partner waiting outside (tot-in-stroller) with a much welcomed steaming beverage. No words are exchanged but the slight smile-crinkles around his eyes as he presents his offering speak volumes.

3. Stepping into my brother's living room and seeing a roaring fire in the fireplace - this one made with actual wood logs and not those horrible fire-starter logs which I am sure are pumped full of chemicals.

Sweet Dreams

1. Tonight...

2. I'm grateful...

3. for falling asleep.

Handy Hands, Tummy Demands and Foreign Lands

1. Another industrious day at Sam's shop. I feel my talents, especially those that have to do with being handy, are being put to good use. I sand, stain and shellac two table tops; wax three others; wash, stain and wax a set of dining chairs; clean a wall of mirrors, banter with a few customers; help to rewire a floor lamp from the 20's; and repair a closet door that has been causing Sam grief for some time. Whew!

2. After my flurry of activity at the shop, it occurs to me that I haven't eaten lunch, but it is already three-thirty and I am scheduled to leave at four, so I slip across the street to the dark and moody Tango Palace (one of our favourite places to nestle in and write - we've taken to referring to it as 'Tango Pa-la-che' or simply 'The Pa-la-che') and request my favourite - a sticky pecan caramel blondie. Well enough sugar to power me late into the night.

3. This evening we return a light fixture we didn't need to IKEA and because we don't have the receipt for our purchase we are issued a credit note. It's not for very much - something like $20 - but we end up having fun spending it on a few little luxuries. An extra set of simple, white cereal bowls (made in China), some chartreuse napkins (by way of the US) to look festive against the dark chocolate brown of our dining table, and ever an IKEA favourite - a bag of 100 tea lights (PRC again).

Visions, Variety, and 'Volver'

1. I find myself thinking that somehow it seems as though a fog has lifted and am surprised to hear Tyler make use exactly these words to describe how he is feeling. We both feel inexpicably more hopeful and optimistic about life in general, and enthused about where it might be taking us. I love little synchronicities like this, and find that I have been experiencing a fair number of late. Often I know exactly who's calling before I even look at the phone. This makes me feel like all the inner work I have been doing to develop my intuition and trust in my inner voice must be doing some good after all.

2. Frustrated by untenable living circumstances we strike out to hunt down and view alternative digs. It's pleasant to get out of our regular routine, and fun exploring the city together, talking all the while. I find it so easy to spend time with Tyler and it seems we can speak endlessly about any subject. After observing firsthand the dearth of appealing aparments / neigbourhoods / rents out there we find that perhaps things aren't quite so bad as they seem. We have the lake, we have charm, we have solitude when we need it. Perhaps the outstanding work can finally be put right and we can once again feel completely at home.

3. As a little reward for all the difficult work we have been slogging though of late, we decide to treat ourselves to a viewing of Almodovar's 'Volver'. We have been excitedly awaiting this for almost three weeks now and Almodovar doesn't fail to please us with his unique brand of entertainment. Tyler's in love with Penelope Cruz and I would like nothing more than a six month hiatus spent knocking about the dusty villages that unfold on the screen before us.

Flushed, fortitude, forgiveness

1. It seems like such a little thing, but today I am grateful to finally have a toilet that flushes. After the ceramic tiles in the bathroom were laid last week we were left with a toilet (two actually) sitting in the middle of our living room floor. Never having actually installed a toilet myself, I knew I had to purchase a new wax sealing ring and got it set up on the flange and bolted down. However, I didn't want to mess with the supply plumbing and it was arranged that a plumber should drop by before the end of the week. Well needless to say, a plumber did not show up before the end of the week, and as such, each time nature has called, we've had to fill up the 5 gallon yellow bucket in the tub and slosh it into the toilet bowl to get the darn thing to flush. It seems like such a little thing, but today I am grateful to finally have a toilet that flushes.

2. I was proud of myself today that I was able to gather enough intestinal fortitude to let the landlord know that "we are not amused" by the fact that we still have neither a full bathroom nor a working kitchen. I think one of the reasons that we were led to this space is that it is giving us the chance to find our voices, and to look out for ourselves. To stop apologizing for ourselves and to request what is rightfully and legally ours. No doubt these as yet not fully tapped skills will serve us well in our future creative careers.

3. It's the darnedest thing, but it seems that one cannot hold gratitude in one's heart and be miffed at the same time. I was a bit put out with he-who-shall-not-be-named this evening for some trivial grievance and wanted to wallow in my own self-pity for a bit, but knowing that I was about to record my three blessings for the day made me realize that I can't very well express gratitude while being closed and uncharitable. Even holding this notion in mind has made me examine my grievance in a new light and see just what it is that was getting under my skin so that now I can perhaps deal more eloquently with the situation at hand in a way that brings enlightenment to all.

Misty, tangerine, industry

1. Gearing up for a morning walk with Zelig, bundling myself in copious layers, only to find the day balmy and springlike. Stepping out of the front doors we are enveloped in a refreshing mist.

2. During a few stolen moments in the streetcar (on the way to mind Sam's shop for him), I slip my tangerine coloured journal from my bag and finish up my morning pages.

3. After several months of working almost exclusively from home, it is refreshing to be out and about in public, interacting with people in the shop, exchanging pleasantries, and helping them come up with ingenious ways to use various furniture pieces in their homes. I spend the afternoon industriously gluing, sanding and repairing bits and pieces, and cleaning and rearranging things throughout the shop.

Meditate, tabulate and appreciate

1. Waking up early-ish on a Sunday morning, and tip-toeing into the living room to get in an hour of quiet meditation and writing before anyone else is up.

2. Working concertedly all afternoon to help my brother get his mountain of expense receipts sorted, catalogued and turned in for re-imbursement. The sense of satisfaction of learning a few new hints related to this task, and the simple pleasure of a a job rather swiftly completed and well done.

3. Walking along the boardwalk on the way home from my brother's, enjoying the sounds of the surf on a rather balmy December evening.

Devouring, delight, and dancing

1. An afternoon of solitude finds me lapping up Julia Cameron's memoir 'Floor Sample'. I've been a big fan for over ten years and I feel as though I am following the life journey of a good friend. The reading inspires me to do some longhand writing of my own, and I am reminded how good it feels to connect with myself in this way, to be in touch with what I really desire to create in my life.








2. While I am speaking with my mother on the telephone about various and sundry Christmas plans, Tyler works his way through the front door of the apartment, Zelig frothing about his ankles in a wild frenzy of delight. Sitting in my favourite reading chairm, I smile to myself as I take in the delightful performance my little family creates for my amusement.










3. Reclining in bed, pecking away at the laptop, I catch a glimpse of the gibbous moon as a phantom behind the window shade upon which the flickering light of candle flame dances its sacred ritual.

A million little pieces, gratitude stones, and my body the temple

1. It's my turn to take Zelig for his morning constitutional, and as he charges off down the gully with me in tow, the lake shatters into a million little shards of mirror and we are jolted awake by the clear light of morning.

2. In the yard in front of our apartment house there is a tree stump about two and a half feet high and almost three feet in diameter. On top of this stump sits an ever-growing collection of bits of brick, washed smooth by the waves of the lake below us, their rectilinear lines giving way to organic curves and hollows that fit perfectly into one's palm. I love to soak up their hues of buff and terracotta as I pass on my way to the laundry room or car.

3. Reeling from the effects of a post-birthday, sugar-induced coma, we decide to swear off sugar for awhile. After meeting with clients I stop off at the market and fill a basket full of all natural 'treats'. Juicy organic oranges, apples, and bananas. Yogurt and raisins and nuts. It feels good to be treating ourselves well, and I am grateful that we have the resources to do so.

Sweet, thoughtful, relief, and perfection

1. At 11:33am Tyler and I are brunching amidst the golden glow at Eddie Levesque's Kitchen. Our first course is lovely, but the rummy bread pudding steals the show. Thirty five years ago today at exactly this time I was busy taking my first breath. Thanks mom. Thanks dad.

2. 7:40am and the birthday phone calls and e-mails start rolling in. It's like clockwork. First my mom (before she heads off to work) and shortly thereafter my dad. It's reassuring how some things never change. I'm also moved by the unexpected e-mails that come from people whom I had no idea kept track of such things.

3. Wondering if my friend Susan might have forgotten my birthday, and feeling a bit sullen not to have heard from her all day, only to be shown up by an enthusiastic message that arrives on the voice mail mid-evening, jam-packed with Susanisms. She hopes I've had a 'groovy day'. She does love me after all!

4. Okay, okay. Again, I can't resist adding a fourth blessing for today. Even though resources are somewhat restricted at the moment, Tyler has rallied the forces and somehow managed to present me with two sweaters in perfect earthy tones (just the way I like them), a copy of Julia Cameron's memoir, and - especially thoughtfully - a copy of Margaret Sommerville's 'The Ethical Imagination' which I went on about after having heard her speak on CBC's 'Ideas' several weeks ago. Thanks Tyler (and the rest of you) for an absolutely wonderful day. I am blessed.

Sheep poo, pant-punt, and peace-inducing treats

1. While doing some research on printing companies for a friend who is printing a book, I come across a website for sheep poo paper, which I find simultaneously amusing and inspiring. The site features an endearing little stick figure drawing of a sheep with bulging eyes which seems to have found its way onto a series of greeting cards. You can check it out for yourself at: www.creativepaperwales.co.uk. Happy sheeping!

2. I've been a bit stumped of late as to why I am not getting any interest in the marketing I am putting out for my interior design services. After a quick power nap I realise that I've been saying for over three years that I want to get out of design as I have known it, and now it seems the Universe has provided me with an 'out' and the opportunity to test my mettle in regard to some of the other ventures I've been saying I want to pursue. Sometimes I just need a kick in the pants - thanks Universe!

3. Just yesterday I was thinking I would like to develop some 'passive streams of income', and tonight, while chatting with my friend Kathy at the Centre for Conscious Living, she tells me of an opportunity which requires minimal investment (really!) and which pays rather handsome dividends. And - get this - they sell a gourmet chocolate which contains an added enzyme which has been proven to reduce stress levels. Ask and you shall receive!

Sky-scape, Loud Scrape, and Shared Space

1. Returning from errands, I glance back over my shoulder at steel blue clouds slung low against a shell pink sky, the R.C. Harris Water Filtration Plant sending up a warm golden glow in the foreground.

2. As Tyler and I are walking along the sidewalk, we hear the bone-jangling scrape of metal against asphalt. We look up to observe a be-kerchiefed, elderly woman struggling with a table in her driveway. I offer to give her a hand and although she resists accepting at first, she cracks a wide smile as I lift the table to its proper spot. We share a sense of being connected in this big old city of five million people.

3. Although we are struggling a bit in finding enough work to keep us afloat, it is lovely to be able to together work from home, sharing a pot of soup at lunch, and whipping up a quick nosh of spaghetti for supper.

Tandoori, Sunshine, and Litchees

1. I start working part-time at a friend's shop. On my first day as a treat he decides to close up shop an hour early and we slip across the street where we share a bottle of wine and a tandoori chicken dinner.

2. Although today is the first really brisk day we have had this season, the walk to work is delightfully bright and sunny. I zag to the north side of the street so that I can soak up as much sun as possible on my forty minute walk.

3. My brother's sent me home from my birthday with an assortment of exotic fruits picked up in Chinatown. I carefully slip a thumbnail under the skin of a litchee and peel it in one long continuous spiral. I pop it into my mouth and enjoy its fleshy fruitiness. I do this with three more litchees. I think to myself what lovely little decorations these spirals might make on an all-naturally ornamented Christmas tree.

Chat, Cherish, Chant

1. After birthday lunch thrown for me by my brother, he and I lounge by the fire and chat about the ins and outs of life - just like old times.

2. With the new floors in the bathroom and kitchen finally in place, we are able to install the new toilet which has been sitting in the corner for months, and return the contents of the kitchen to their rightful place. Even though not everything in the apartment is yet what we would like it to be, surveying the newly rearranged and polished surroundings, we have to admit it's a beautiful spot we have.

3. After a somewhat tiring day, after all the moving Tyler and I have done, and after taking account of a seemingly unsolveable financial situation, it's quite heavenly to slip into bed with the soothing music of Deva Premal playing softly in the background, and to realize that here and now everything is perfect. Everything is as it should be.

Tile, Tyler and Teriyaki

1. After four long months of waiting, our bathroom and kitchen floors are finally in. It feels a bit like Christmas as I find myself alternately walking to either the kitchen or the bathroom and turning the lights on just so I can take in the clean, rectilinear lines of the newly laid ceramic tiles. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

2. Every once in awhile I am caught of guard as I turn my head and Tyler falls into my line of view and I realize afresh how strikingly handsome he is. He looks particularly snappy today in his window-pane checked white shirt and blue zip up cardigan topping his indigo, papery jeans.

3. Tyler and I share a bento box at our favourite Japanese restaurant on Queen Street. I'm not sure we even know the name of it. We refer to it as the one with the paper umbrellas hanging from the ceiling. Miso soup seems like the most nourishing food on the face of the earth.

Reading, Writing and a Cozy Little Nap

1. I am struck today by what an incredible blessing it is to be able to read. How grateful I am for eyes that see, for authors that write, for bloggers who blog, for ideas that are shared, for the sense of awe and inspiration this mode of communication affords.

2. I am moved to tears today reading Julia Cameron's memoir 'Floor Sample'. I am particularly moved as I realize how much I have always loved both reading and writing but in my earlier years somehow eschewed it for things I thought somehow more important. I am awash in a wave of grief that acknowledges loss, while simultaneouly enlightened by the realization of how much of my life is yet ahead of me - and by the foundation of confidence in my writing (and other) abilities which has slowly surfaced over the years. I am grateful for all that Julia has done to encourage the arts and my own creative abilities. I am thankful that her book 'The Artist's Way' was recommended to me by a friend over ten years ago.

3. Under a darkened sky the wind whips around our little apartment house and the rain slashes sideways against the single panes of leaded glass making it all the more cozy and comforting to be able to go back to bed for a wee nap in the late morning.

Gasp, Sigh, Dream

1. Having been pent up in a dimly lit home office for the better part of the day, emerging through the bevelled glass doors of our apartment house to be taken completely off guard by a gorgeous slice of orangey brightness lighting up the horizon above the bottle-glass-blue of the lake below.

2. Spending a few quiet moments - between harried writing jobs and making arrangements with banks - to cantilever myself over the back of one of the reading chairs with Zelig wedged in beside me, the both of us watching the rain drops gather and fall from the bird feeder just outside the window.

3. Completely dissolving into a steamy bath and retreating to a small hillside town in Italy while devouring six or eight chapters of Nino Ricci's "Lives of the Saints".

Waking, Washing and Walking

After much hesitation, deliveration and procrastination (and waiting for Mercury to turn direct) I have finally decided to initiate my first blog. This blog is to serve as a reminder for me to focus on the many blessings that surround me on a daily basis.

It is my intention to list here at the end of each day at least three things for which I am grateful. It has been said, "that which we think about and thank about we bring about". I am grateful for the many wonders I experience and wish to draw more of the same into my life. By counting or re-counting my blessings here, my desire is to magnify them in my own consciousness, and perhaps encourage others to see and acknowledge the goodness that abounds in their own lives.

As mentioned in the sidebar, this blog is at least in part inspired by our puppy Zelig. His name was consciously chosen to be an indicator of things to come. Zelig is a derivative of a German name meaning blessed, and true to his name he has proven to be a blessing in more ways than one. I am sure he will be a bit of a recurring theme in these pages, I did steal his name for my title after all, the least I can do is recount his own particular brand of doggie-goodness from time to time!

Special thanks as well to Clare Grant of 'Three Beautiful Things' for her inspiration and lively writing - I've really enjoyed following your posts, Clare, and admire your writing.

As we have focused on the fact that Zelig is a blessing, he has become one. What we put our attention on increases and manifests in our lives, and in that spirit, here is the first edition of the Zelig Three, three things I am grateful for today:

1. Waking in a sleepy haze and lounging in a comfy bed for a few extra minutes, relishing the sensation of being enveloped in the luxury of Egyptian cotton sheets.

2. Lathering up with my friend Anastasia's all natural handmade soap scented with cinnamon and patchouli oils. See Anastasia's complete line at 'Anointment'.

3. An unseasonably warm walk on the beach with Zelig this morning - wearing flip-flops on November 29th!

4. (Sorry, couldn't resist adding another) Accidentally finding photos of my first official trip with Tyler to White Point, Nova Scotia this past April and the rush of happy memories that came flooding in.