19 Works in His Majesty (Baldur's Gate)
Listing Works
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“Shall I confess my other sins to you while I’m at it?” His eyes bore into you, and you cannot help but shuffle your feet and blush at his charms.
“The only sin I can hear from you are terrible pick-up lines…” Shadowheart sneers. Your coworker from behind the counter hands her a drink. “Oh gods, thank you so much. You’re saving me from a terrible show.” She smiles devilishly, pointedly eyeing the man in front of you before starting to quickly shuffle her way out of the cafe.
“The only terrible show I can see is the dredge on your face you call make-up,” The man before you snarls back as Shadowheart passes by him. Shadowheart does not verbally respond, simply giving him the middle finger as she opens the cafe door, and you hear the familiar bong-bing chime reversed to signal a customer leaving.
This fanfiction is just gratuitous porn disguised as a Coffee Shop Alternate Universe.
There are also copious amounts of shitty memes and pop culture references.
You have been warned.
[Rated Explicit for graphic sexual content.]
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All seemed to be in order. For now. One must remain vigilant. After all, it hadn’t been long since all that nonsense had spilled into his domain. Most unacceptable. The whole kerfuffle had quite ruined his afternoon sunbathing. That there had been no sunbeams in his domain due to the effects of that dreadful curse was entirely irrelevant. Why, the mess had taken days to clean up! Not that he had done any of it himself, of course. That’s what underlings were for.
Series
- Part 2 of Baldur's Gate 3 Tarot Project
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In which The Dark Urge is messed up in the head, and Astarion's plan for tempting her into sex goes awry, but not entirely.
Warning: brief, playful mentions of murder / su*cide, but no violence occurs
Also, this is my first time ever posting here, so I'm trying to get a handle on all appropriate tags/warnings/etc. Forgive me please if I've done this wrong.
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The Cleric of Corellon Larethian by Steampunksherlockian
Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
17 Dec 2024
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A high Half-Elf Paladin with a first name in Common. He worships Corellon Larethian, the creator God of Elves, yet the gangly freckled boy is a mere two digits into his elven adulthood, despite being twenty-seven in human.
Looking for a job in Baldur’s Gate is the earliest he remembers before waking up to the voice of a Halfling in his mind, aboard a Nautiloid being pursued by Githyanki Dragon Riders and Devil Commanders on the front lines of the Blood War.
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Astarion can't get the druid out of his head. He keeps thinking about their shared evening, while he wants nothing more than to forget.
It just so happens that the druid won't stay out of his life - thanks to Astarions nosy friend group.Continuation of "Hunt For Happiness"
What he didn't expect was that their lifes not only were already intertwined, but they wouldn't be as easily separated as he hoped.Series
- Part 2 of Happiness
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You're a professor of Classical Theatre and you find yourself inexplicably drawn to the infuriating arrogance of Dr. Ancunín in the English department.
Series
- Part 2 of Office Hours Extended Universe
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20/31 Cannibalism by drownedrow
Fandoms: Dungeons & Dragons (Roleplaying Game), Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
30 Oct 2024
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The Urge receives a gift from his beloved Father.
Series
- Part 5 of Daddy’s Specialist Boy
- Part 20 of KinkyGuroWhumpy BG3 One-Shots :)
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I'll be there when your reality drowns by BelierDigitalis
Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
09 Oct 2024
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Dwyn Kelaril is a young half-elf who was raised by the Feywild Syndicate after being found as a youngling. After getting swept away from her life in Baldur’s Gate by mindflayers, she finds herself leading a group of adventurers who seem to pick up on some strange quirks the young bard possesses.
Her moral compass often leaves much to be desired for a leader who’s supposed to save the realms from its demise. She’s more of a schemer than a savior, after all.
No longer under the watchful eye of her father and his organization, she finds herself questioning who she actually is. And why has this devil taken such an interest in her?
Smut chapters:
3. Under my spell - Aradin
7. Martyr - Gale*READ THE TAGS*
It's unlikely that I'll ever continue this story. -
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“No one cares about feral cats. It’s like Shadowheart said. They’re only good for.…” He paused, his face twisting into a grimace of disgust and anger. “They’re only good for eating rats.”
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Wherein a stray cat inadvertently acts as an intermediary for Aeolian and Astarion.
Series
- Part 2 of The Tales of Aeolian the Bard
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“I think, my love, that if we survive this, I have some work to do.”
Mina was suddenly very aware of her breathing. Some combination of hope and heartbreak was seeping into her chest as he spoke.
“You’ve given me so much. I don’t… I don’t think I know how to give anything to anyone that isn’t being taken against my will. I want to learn that. And I have learned a lot from you, but I don’t want you to be my teacher or my test subject. I… I think I need to figure it out on my own.”
He was speaking softly, almost murmuring, and there were explosions in the distance, but he was the only thing Mina could hear.
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(Originally titled “Disarmed”)
it just always makes me sad that the timeline of the game is such that when you run off with astarion at the end he's still a baby and you can't let him live his own life for a bit AND have a romantic ending
but i say you can and he deserves it!!!!!!
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show me your teeth (got no salvation) by Ellerigby13
Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
20 Feb 2024
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After fifty years of spawnhood and pampering in the new Ancunín Palace, Tav is thankful for all Astarion has given her - and perhaps, waiting on eternity to surprise her.
Thankfully, he's a merciful and generous Vampire Lord. His gifts can only get better.
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Not every artist has a muse, but for Nulihn, their work is almost entirely centered around theirs. They don’t know his story or even his name. As far as they know, though, he’s a character that their mind created when they were fifteen. Yet somehow, the pale elf of their art and the glimpses they see in their head feels more than that. He feels like a person.
Struggling with migraines isn’t an uncommon thing for Astarion. It’s something that he’s been dealing with all this life. He tries to hide it, to mask what he’s feeling, to not let anyone see any weakness that he has. It’s usually easy to put a practiced smile on his face, but there are… certain migraines. When they come, he can only hope that he only hears a tune being played in the background or sees a reassuring and gentle smile. He doesn’t want to lose himself in the others.
Neither had any idea that the other existed until a small art show in a bookshop called Tara’s brought them together.
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imitation is the sincerest form of flattery by MzRogueRaz (EggplantRed)
Fandoms: Baldur's Gate (Video Games)
31 Jan 2024
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His Majesty had heard Astarion loud and clear and let him know it too.
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Five years after the defeat of the Absolute, Xerxes and Astarion are happily homesteading in the Underdark while searching for a cure when their home is suddenly invaded.
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Series of one shots, exploring Astarion's mindset through his romance with GN Tav (gender and race undefined to the best of my ability).
"What was illogical, to him, was that Tav permitted it. Letting the vampire hold them tight, pinned with their back to his chest while he fed. Perhaps they had a bizarre vampire fetish - it certainly wouldn’t be the first time he’d encountered such. There was a soft trembling to their skin as he fed, barely parted lips in the dying firelight while the others slept.
But the few nights Astarion declined in a huff, they smiled and said they were glad he wasn’t hungry. A puzzling mystery that irked at him, staying on his mind in the hours between fights."
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just a little one-shot i wrote of a few of the bg3 lads in a modern/no magic au. Takes place roughly around college ages or a little older. There's some mild halstarion because I think they're neat, but this was mainly an excuse to write about the animals.
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Jude noticed when the horror of others morphed into a kind of sick fascination, sycophants who wondered what it would be like to not only be sampled by him, but to become what he was. It must make him sick, she thought, and yet here she was—sitting across from a vampire spawn who had openly admitted his hunger, and feeling every nerve ending in her body warm to it.
Or: Not once had she allowed Astarion to feed on her, no matter how sweetly he asked. It wasn’t until Jude and her companions passed the borders into the Shadowlands that they realised their resident vampire may have trouble feeding in the land of the dead. And when said vampire is wholly responsible for saving her life after an ambush, could she, in good conscience, deny him?
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This takes place 2 years after the events in Baldur's Gate. Tav and Astarion have been staying in Waterdeep while Gale attempts to help them find a cure for Astarion's vampirism.
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'Darling,
let me tell you a secret,
In my heart,
we are always kissing.'
-Alexandra Vasiliu
~
Tav is beginning her new job as the Co-Director of the Fine Arts Department at Baldur's University. She comes highly recommended by her 'close friend' Gale. After bumping head's with the other Co-Director of the Fine Arts department, a sickeningly handsome man with ruby red irises, Tav can't imagine how she will survive the semester.