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Ed can’t come like this, he knows that much for certain.
Stede is going to make him try, anyway.
They’re on the bed, Ed rubbing his Hello Kitty panties in fits and desperate starts against the solid flesh of Stede’s thigh, and Ed can’t fucking come, not like this.
Or: Ed wears Hello Kitty panties and Stede is a massive fucking pervert about it.
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Indulge Your Cravings by ChaoticReader1031, What_Accountants_Do
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
09 Feb 2025
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Summary
Ed and Stede are finding out what kinks they enjoy. Today Ed is clingy and Stede just needs him to settle so he does the logical thing.
**Blanket permission to anyone who would like to create art or podfics**
Series
- Part 9 of Sugar, We're Going Down
- Part 1 of Indulge Your Cravings
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The Epitome of Sweetness by ChaoticReader1031, What_Accountants_Do
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
09 Feb 2025
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Summary
The boys go to Mary's wedding. Ed has an important question for Stede.
Series
- Part 8 of Sugar, We're Going Down
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It’s a fucking travesty. It’s an oozing, malignant cyst of a dessert. It breaks its banks when Ed cuts into it, releasing a tide of chocolate goo, which floods not only over the edges of the tray but halfway across the fucking table. Ed goes 'shit, shit', and he tries to stop the deluge with his bare fucking hand (again, exhibiting a laughable lack of foresight, insight, hindsight, all the sights). The liquid is blisteringly hot, hot enough that Ed instantly yanks his fingers back with a hiss and a litany of furious curses, and he abandons the whole fucking mess with an explosive kick to the kitchen counter.
He stubs his toe.
This is the cake’s fault.
Fuckin’ cake. Whole thing’s fucked. Well and truly.
But there is something worse than Ed’s abysmal excuse for a cake. Far worse. Unimaginably worse:
Stede thinks Ed is wonderful.
(OR: Stede showers Ed with praise every time he messes something up. Ed comes to a devastating conclusion about the reason why. Angst, fluff, talking it through (as a Two), and some emotionally healing make-up sex. For LizPoppe 💛)
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He parts his lips, bleps his tongue out between them. And then he presses just the tip against Stede’s pretty pink cock, gives him a cute kitten lick, just for a taste.
Or: kitty Ed gets his milk, in one way or another.
Series
- Part 4 of the kitty 'verse
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Podfic of "Stede's Good Boy" by pirate_captains_captain_pirates by EliThorn
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
30 Jan 2025
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Summary
The Author's summary:
Ed is, usually, Stede's perfectly sweet, obedient sub. Usually. When they play with denial and Ed disobeys Stede's orders, he learns that having multiple orgasms can actually be a punishment - and he learns that he really likes, above all, just being Stede's good boy. -
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Summary
Ed has just woken up from the gravy basket.
The crew are having a hard time adjusting to Ed being back, and Stede, desperate to repair his relationship with Ed, proposes a trip to help them all move along.
(Note: there is no plot I just like to write dialogue and put people in Situations) -
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Summary
Stede leaves a gift for Ed on his pillow, along with a note:
"Good morning, Princess. Be a good girl and put this on for me? If you’re wearing it when I get home, you’ll get a special reward. Keep your phone on you. xoxo"
...the gift is a cockcage.
(Title from the song Rollercoaster by M. Ward) -
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Ed lifts the tail from the box, one hand running through the fur whilst the other finds the purple silicone of the plug, closing his palm around the shape of it. His next inhale mirrors the soft flutter of his heartbeat, tremulous under the weight of want pressing down on his ribcage.
“I saw you looking at this one, when we went to get your ears and collar, and I… well, I thought maybe you might like to give it a try?” Stede takes a breath, and when Ed dares a glance up at him, he looks so sweetly nervous; so intensely protective that Ed’s eyes start welling up, going all soft and swimmy beneath Stede’s gaze.
Sometimes being loved is being bought a tail plug.
And Ed feels so fucking loved.
Or: Stede buys Ed a tail plug.
Series
- Part 3 of the kitty 'verse
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Ed had thought sex with Stede was good before. And it had been! But that had been before he was dealing with the full force of Stede Bonnet feeling confident, comfortable in his body, and sexy. And now he’d tasted that?
Yeah. Ed couldn’t get enough. Fuckin’ sue him. If he got to spend the rest of his life completely cockdrunk on Stede’s perfect new dick, he’d die a happy man.Ever since Stede's got the go-ahead for a full return to sexual activity after his phalloplasty surgeries, Ed's been a bit...insatiable.
There's a woeful lack of post-phallo porn in this fandom and here I am to deliver 🫡
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I'm going to have to give you a warning! God. Just thinking about Mr. Bonnet reprimanding him instead has Ed tugging his skirt out of the way and grinding down against his fucking wheely office chair like a desperate slut.
Stede is Ed's boss.
And Ed fucking loves getting bossed around.
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Edward felt his blood starting to boil. “You think I can’t handle myself, Izzy?” His voice was low and dangerous.
But of course, Israel Hands had not once in his miserable fucking life known when to stop pushing without someone else putting him in his place first. “Edward, see reason! I’ll have your back just in case. That way you’d be able to relax.” He had stepped closer now and Edward saw red.
In the blink of an eye, he had Izzy by the collar, spun them around and pushed him backwards against and slightly over the bulwark. Just far enough that if Edward should let go without a warning, Izzy wouldn’t definitely fall, but there was a very good chance he might.
----An illustrated exploration of why one would get a "Trust No One" tramp stamp (that tattoo did not look fresh!), since that feels less like a reminder to yourself and more like a message to the people topping you...
Told through seven sexual encounters spanning from Hornigold's ship to Post-Canon Era.First chapter is only mature, but the explicitness ramps up.
Series
- Part 1 of The Marks Left On Your Skin
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Summary
The shade is so perfect that Ed isn’t sure how he’s supposed to resist, or why he’d even try to. The lingerie set is all lace, practically translucent, a bright, rich purple that speaks to him so directly that he’s in the bathroom figuring out the complicated process of comparing his body to the sizing guide on the website before he’s really thought any of it through.
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On Christmas Eve, Ed and Stede are preparing a certain sexy surprise for their first Christmas with their partner Izzy.
The surprise in question involves lots of leather and lots of sex!
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In which Ed falls back into some of his unhealthier habits after the events of Season 1, and gets a little religious. This is a porn rewrite of my previous work, 'i lay down my heart with the rest at his feet'. I'm not entirely happy with it because I wrote most of it a year and a half ago but hey the porn is OK at least. God have mercy on my soul.
content warnings are in tags, please let me know if i missed anything out that i should add !!
title is from 'take me to church' by hozier
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,625
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Kudos:
- 1
- Hits:
- 85
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Savor Every Sweet Moment by ChaoticReader1031, What_Accountants_Do
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
29 Dec 2024
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Summary
Snapshots of Ed and Stede’s relationship as things get more serious
Series
- Part 7 of Sugar, We're Going Down
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choked up, face down, burnt out by serpent_and_dahlia
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
28 Dec 2024
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Summary
They were on round four of their game.
It had all been Ed’s idea. He’d explained to Stede what he wanted the other night, the two of them sitting side by side in bed, and watched with no small amount of delight as Stede’s eyes grew larger and larger with each word that came out of Ed’s mouth.
He’d felt smug about it, at the time—surprising Stede like that. Introducing him to something new, something his own (frankly kinda depraved) imagination hadn’t thought of.
Ed should’ve known better, really. As if he was going to beat Stede Bonnet in some kind of “total fucking lunatic” competition.
The rules of the game went like this: Stede could come as much as he wanted, whenever he wanted. Ed could only come when Stede told him to. Ed was to lay exactly as Stede directed him, open and waiting, and let Stede use him as he wished.
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“A thigh strap?” he asks.
“Mmhm!” Stede says with a proud nod.
“Huh,” Ed responds.
Stede sets his hand on Ed’s bare knee, sending sparks up Ed’s thigh. “Would you like to try it out?”
“Well…” Ed says, turning the strap over in his hands. “No offense, mate, but I was kind of hoping to bottom tonight.”
“Oh! Oh no. Sorry,” Stede says with a chuckle. “I suppose I haven’t been entirely clear with my intentions. No, I’ll be wearing this tonight, darling.”
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Ed only wants a few things for his birthday, and one of them just happens to be his husband's cock. But Stede can't make anything easy. Of course, he's going to make him work for his real gift. -
Podfic of feline rivalry by sparklespriggs by Baby_kraken for sparklespriggs (nerolinks)
Fandoms: Our Flag Means Death (TV)
03 Dec 2024
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Summary
Stede rescues an abandoned kitten during a storm and decides to keep it. Ed is definitely not jealous of the kitten. Nope. Not one bit.
The bell is back, I will not apologise for being a Menace 😼
(Probably listen to this one with headphones in…) -
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Summary
Eddie has a bad brain day; Fang takes care of her.
Series
- Part 2 of Love Between
- Part 1 of OFMD Lesbian Week '24